Calefaction
by ExploitingReality
Summary: Bella, adopted by the Cullens as an infant, has grown into an integral part of their family. When she disappears one afternoon, they desperately retrieve her. But something is amiss and everything is changing. Ed x Bel x Jas. M for later chapters.
1. Memory Lane

**A/N: Okay, my muse is being a capricious bitch lately, and her demands grow tiresome. This was supposed to be a lemony good one shot, but she decided to give it a back story, and alas, here is Chapter One.**

**A Few Noteworthy Comments: Though this is in the Jasper x Bella section, please be advised that it is a Jasper x Bella x Edward story. There will be very little, if any slash in this work. Also, there is an original character introduced; if that's not your thing, you may not want to read, as she plays an important role in the overall plot. **

**~Ex**

**Update 11/28/2011: Reworking and editing the story a bit as I look for inspiration to finish it. As always, feel free to PM me any questions or comments**

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Calefaction

Chapter 1

Memory Lane

**Jasper POV**

"Bella?" My shout sliced sharply through the still night air, startling a flock of shrieking, terrified birds into flight. An echo of my query resounded somewhere to my left, Rosalie's beautiful voice laced with fear. Emmett's tense baritone parroted our call a few seconds later, perhaps a mile ahead. I knew that Edward, Alice, and Carlisle were all out here as well, buried deep in the dense forest surrounding our home, in search of the girl. Esme had opted to stay back at the house, in case Bella showed up, an idea that seemed less and less likely. My family's agitation beat at me incessantly as we pursued every trace of her scent, pale wraiths moving with ungodly speed amongst the trees, but I couldn't blame them. More and more of the fear I felt in response to this situation was mine. Bella had disappeared several hours ago, apparently without a trace.

To vanish completely off the radar, when seven vampires with preternatural senses were looking for you, well it took a lot more skill than a single, seventeen year old mortal possessed. Of course, she could always be…

"Don't," Edward growled a low warning as he caught wind of my thoughts. How many times had he seen our human dead in the others' heads this evening, and by how many means? I immediately wiped the slate of my mind clean.

The idea that Bella, our sweet, clumsy, adopted, human sister might be dead was beyond our comprehension. She'd only been with us seventeen short years. To lose her now would be devastating.

As I pushed deeper into the thick foliage, periodically calling her name as well as seeking her emotions (a feat made nearly impossible with my family in such close proximity) I got to thinking of the first time I'd seen the girl.

Isabella Marie Cullen had been born September 13, 1987. I shook my head faintly, a fond smile curling my lips. Had it really been so long ago? It felt like only yesterday.

Unfortunately, she hadn't been born into the best of families. With typically misguided human judgment, her birth mother had deemed her a burden far too great to bear, and she'd been abandoned at the hospital in which Carlisle was working, in the small town of Sequim, about 75 miles from Forks, where we made our current home. Not surprisingly, there were very few areas other than the Pacific Northwest that offered us the weather necessary to proceed with our relatively normal lives.

Anyway, Carlisle being Carlisle, had offered to take the infant home until an appropriate set of foster parents could be found for her. Now let it be known that it has been years since any of us has slipped up and consumed human blood, but to bring a mortal infant into a house full of vampires, well I don't think I need to point out the numerous flaws in Carlisle's decision making. I will say that we were all quite flattered that he thought so highly of us.

But Carlisle was wise beyond our comprehension. The moment that Esme and Rosalie had laid eyes on the child, before any of the rest of us could even get a very good look at the writhing, squawking bundle, it was made implicit that they would tear anyone or anything that looked to be a threat to the child to pieces so small that they would never be put back together. They'd nothing to fear, however. The thing was so tiny that the smell of her blood was easily overpowered by the other abhorrent odors she was quick to produce.

My siblings and I, _sans_ Rose, had been less than impressed, and more than eager for the child to be returned to human parents; the sooner the better.

Though the expression on Alice's face when Bella had pissed on her new designer blouse... truly priceless. With her abilities, you really would've thought she'd seen that coming.

Edward's quiet laughter sounded from somewhere behind me, and I smiled faintly at the familiar presence that joined me in my head to view my memories.

The weeks passed, and while the rest of us grew impatient, it was plain to see that Rosalie and Esme were dreading the day when the child would leave our family. Even level-headed Carlisle seemed saddened by the prospect.

Never mind the rest of us.

It had taken several weeks of wheedling by Rosalie, and some rather persuasive feminine wiles by Esme but eventually, Carlisle had caved. To say that we had been surprised by the news that we were keeping the child permanently would be a gross understatement. A human child raised by a house full of vampires? The fates had a rather sick sense of humor.

But Carlisle had signed the papers the very next day, refusing to budge on the issue, no matter how much Alice and Edward had begged.

"I don't beg," Edward loftily informed me, and I chuckled.

_I remember some definite begging on your part, _I replied silently.

"Obviously your memory is faulty. Besides, it's not as though you were exactly silent on the matter."

_Esme didn't even like that table. Or those lamps. And she was just itchin' to get rid of that ugly China that Tanya gave her. I was doing her a favor by getting rid of them._

Edward laughed in response and I returned to my reminiscing.

It hadn't taken long for the two devious women to convert Emmett to Team Bella, luring him with the child's antics and laughter, and before long he was even more protective of the girl than the other two; a feat I'd previously thought impossible.

Alice's betrayal had been most surprising. Guess we really should've known that the opportunity to dress her own little human doll would be a temptation too great to resist. Frills and bows, lace and ribbons… I couldn't recall Alice having so much fun dressing someone else since 1982. (Neon leg-warmers. Enough said.)

And so it was that the number of us who wished the child gone dwindled, until only Edward and I remained. I'd never have thought that the two of us would end up in such an odd alliance.

"Nor I."

_Do you recall what happens next?_ My thoughts were colored with my smile.

"As though I could forget."

Trees flew by, little more than dark blurs, as I gave myself over to memory, confident that my keen senses would continue the search that was feeling more and more futile.

_It had been perhaps five years since the adoption of our Isabella, and Edward and I were still sullen on the subject. While the rest of the family romped about noisily with the child in one of the rooms we'd been forced to convert into a playroom, Edward and I sulked on the couch, he with his nose in a book and I flipping through channels at a pace that would've definitely given my inhuman status away._

_Tiny feet, clad in whatever superfluously feminine shoes Alice had managed to find, scuffled over the hardwood floors and I froze at their approach; the girl usually avoided her two broody brothers, or perhaps we'd been avoiding her, I couldn't be entirely sure. Edward must've heard her as well, because he too stiffened, closing his book. Emmett's quiet, solid footsteps sounded just behind the child's. She had her own six foot five puppy. Or guard dog as the case may be._

_I'd scooted to the edge of the couch, on the verge of fleeing, when the small, gentle fluttering of her heart assaulted my ears. I turned instinctively toward the sound, my eyes widening in surprise. Standing primly in Emmett's long shadow was a young girl, dressed all in pink. Her frilled, rosy petticoats came to rest just above her plump little knees, and her impossibly small feet were clad in shoes that must've taken hours to get into, for all of the buckles, buttons and lace. Chestnut curls rested neatly against her tiny shoulders, held back by two perfect bows. Her dark eyes seemed impossibly large for her round face, and held knowledge well beyond her five years. Wise, I was startled to find myself thinking, her innocent gaze held wisdom._

_The stray thought was followed swiftly by another. What exactly was I seeing? Was the unusual shrewdness in her gaze simply the product of living in a house full of intelligent vampires, or something more? Did she _know_? We'd known it would only be a matter of time before we'd be forced to reveal what we were to the girl, but so soon?_

_I looked to Edward frantically, but he seemed just as astonished by the child as I was. How had she grown so quickly? _

What's she thinking? _I requested silently of Edward._

_His tawny eyes were focused on the child's face, and he smiled faintly, his tone holding a hint of saddened awe as he replied so quickly the girl would not be able to hear._

"_She thinks we look like angels."_

If only she knew, _I thought sourly._

"_She knows."_

_So Carlisle _had _told her then. And she wasn't in hysterics, which either meant she didn't fully understand, she didn't believe, or Carlisle was a genius. There was certainly merit in introducing the idea while her young mind was still naïve enough to accept it, before age and cynicism had shielded her against such superstitious nonsense as vampires._

_She had tipped her head gently to one side, and was peering at us with avid curiosity. I suddenly wished for Edward's ability. What was she thinking about us, what did she want to say? What did I even know about her? How many words had Edward or I spoken to her?_

"_None."_

Never? We've never interacted with her?_ I desperately tried to think of a time when Edward or myself had done something with the child. Cooked for her, changed her, played with her, sang to her, read her mind? Something?_

"_No," he replied adamantly._

_She stepped into the room, a tentative smile on her rosy cheeked little face. Emmett leaned against the door jam, grinning wryly. He was obviously enjoying our discomfort._

"_He is. Far too much," Edward verified._

_The child came to stand before us. It was almost unnerving, the intensity with which she was staring. To think, a vampire made uncomfortable by a five year old human child. I couldn't help but chuckle at the absurdity._

_She seemed to take my laughter as invitation, and a brilliant smile lit her entire face as she climbed up onto the cushion next to me. Or she attempted to. Halfway up, her foot slipped off the fabric of the couch, and she went tumbling backward. Emmett's terror skyrocketed to a point of blinding intensity and I could only stare, drowning in his fear, as she hurtled backward toward the glass-topped coffee table._

_Luckily, Edward, unaffected by Emmett's desperate panic, reached out, lightly plucked the flailing girl from the air, and set her safely between us. Emmett's relief was so profound that I wondered if he might be brought to his knees by the sudden range of emotions. _

_Isabella's heart was racing wildly from her near miss, but she offered Edward the most angelic smile I'd ever seen._

"_Thank you very much, Edward." Her little voice was like a crystal bell, ringing musically throughout the room. _

_Edward seemed taken aback. Perhaps he was surprised that she could speak? The idea irritated me for reasons I couldn't name. She was human, not an animal._

"_I know that," he snapped sharply, at a speed beyond human comprehension, before turning his eyes on the girl. "You're welcome, Isabella," he replied cordially, if a little stiffly._

_She blinked those wide eyes and shook her head gently. The sweet scent of raspberries and vanilla drifted up from her bobbing curls. _

"_Just Bella, please," she demanded._

_Amusement washed over me from Edward, and I glanced at him in surprise._

Resolve's weakening, huh?

_He didn't respond, and I shook my head. So our little sister was cute. She was a child, it was to be expected. It didn't negate the fact that she had been unwillingly thrust upon us, intruding and insinuating herself into our daily lives. Because of her, ours was a family divided._

"_Did you ever think, Jasper, that perhaps it is because of _us_ that our family is divided?" he murmured swiftly._

_I started at the idea, turning to stare at Edward as though his sanity had fled._

No, _came my instant, unwavering reply._

"_The child has brought nothing but joy and happiness to the rest of our family, but because we refuse her, they feel guilt for enjoying her presence. We separate ourselves, avoid our own home, simply to escape her. How is this her fault?"_

_I mulled over his words broodingly, refusing to find truth in them. If the child had not been brought to us, then things would be as they were meant to be, as they had been. Rosalie and Emmett would be on their umpteenth honeymoon and Alice, Edward and I would be traveling the world, exploring places we'd never seen. But instead, here we all were, taking care of the brat. _

_Edward grimaced at my acerbic thoughts and I frowned at him. It had not been so long ago that his musings on the child closely echoed my own._

Traitor, _I thought sullenly._

"_Excuse me, Jasper?"_

_Warm, tiny fingers curled around the cuff of my shirt, and tugged insistently. I turned a frosty look upon the child. I half expected her to recoil, but she simply smiled her sweet smile and waited for my reply._

"_Yes?" My tone matched my eyes._

"_Well, I was just wondering. Can you see the future, like Alice?"_

_I shook my head curtly, unwilling to offer more of an answer than that. How did one explain empathic abilities to a five year old child? The idea wasn't a fond one._

"_Are you sure? Cause Daddy told me that you and Edward had some special powers, like Alice," she nodded solemnly._

_Daddy? Did she mean…Carlisle? It was all I could do to keep laughter from ruining my unaffected façade._

_Edward smoothly picked up where I'd left off as I attempted to regain my composure._

"_Well Isabella," the girl glared petulantly and he hastily corrected himself. "Sorry, Bella. Jasper and I can't see the future, like Alice can, but we do have our own 'special powers'. I can read minds…" _

_The unfamiliar phrase drew a look of confusion, the girl's brows drawing together as her lips pulled into a thoughtful moue. _

_Edward paused, searching his vocabulary for words and ideas that would be understandable to a child. "Hm. I can hear what you're thinking, before you say it. Here, I'll show you. Think of a color, any color."_

_Sticky fingers tapped a small chin as Bella affected an exaggerated expression of thoughtfulness. "Hmmmmm," she hummed. She grinned once more, giving an excited bounce as she leaned toward Edward. "Okay! Go ahead and guess."_

_I rolled my eyes as Edward played along; squinting as though he was struggling to see into her mind. "You're thinking of the colorrr… grass green."_

_Her eyes widened to almost comical proportions, and she lurched forward as she pointed at Emmett excitedly, nearly falling headlong toward the floor before Edward laid a restraining hand on her shoulder. "Did you see _that_, Em? You don't even gotta talk! He just knows the words!"_

_Emmett chuckled indulgently, nodding. "I did see." Under his breath I heard him mutter, "Trust me kiddo, it's not nearly as fun as you think."_

_Bella had already moved on, however, turning toward me expectantly. "Guess the color!" she demanded in her little voice, apparently expecting that Edward and I had the same ability._

_"Sunshine yellow?" I guessed dryly. Disappointment briefly billowed into the air around her before it was sucked immediately back in to be replaced by her perpetual excitement. _

_"Yours is different!" she exclaimed. "What can you do? Can you fly? Or go invisible? That would be _so cool_!"_

_Edward and Emmett's laughter grated on my already dwindling patience. I glanced at the sliding glass door longingly, wondering if it was too late to escape with any sort of dignity intact._

_"That ship has sailed," Edward answered my thoughts with a smirk before looking at the child who was watching me so expectantly. "Jasper can tell how you're feeling, and sometimes he can make you feel things."_

_She nodded slowly, and I could almost see the wheels in her head spinning as she processed this influx of information. "Can you show me?" she finally asked._

_I didn't want to, but I had a feeling that she'd plague me with questions, and really an example would be easier and more effective. I reached out with my ability, lightly testing the waters._

_"Well," I hedged. "Do you feel sleepy right now?"_

_She needed a moment to think about it, before finally shaking her head. "Nope."_

_I tentatively released a slight wave of exhaustion, unsure if, like medication, her small frame would require only a small dose of the emotional push. Within moments she was rubbing her eyes, tucking the toes of her shoes under Edward's leg as her head lolled back onto the couch cushion. I reined in my influence just before sleep was eminent._

_Despite my restraint she took several minutes to recover, smiling sleepily up at me as she yawned. "Wow, you're like a superhero! If someone wanted to rob a bank, you could just make them fall asleep. Cool."_

_She blinked tiredly, her lips parting several times as though she meant to speak, before she'd simply smack them and lapse back into silence. _

"_But… What if I don't want to feel sleepy?" She finally asked, turning to look at me almost accusingly, before setting the expression loose on Edward. "And what if there's stuff inside my brain that I don't want you to know about?" She asked the questions as though she already knew the answers and they were an affront to her delicate sensibilities._

_Emmett snorted, shaking his head as he watched the three of us. "Welcome to the family, kid."_

_Edward had been struggling to suppress a smile, but it finally broke free as he idly touched the end of one of her loose curls._

_"I do my best not to hear thoughts that others don't like me too."_

_She scowled, looking quite a bit like a disgruntled kitten in her sudden fit of self-righteous anger. "Do you do it on purpose?"_

_He shook his head. "No. I've tried to, on rare occasions, but it doesn't seem to work like that. It's more like…" He reached for the remote, pressing the power button before turning the volume down until it was little more than background noise. Bella immediately turned to the brightly colored cartoon characters, her attention easily diverted, but Edward placed a finger lightly beneath her chin and turned her face back to his. "The sound from the television? That's like the sound of other people's thoughts. Even though I'm talking to you, I can still hear it, and if I'm quiet, or I concentrate, I can understand it more clearly."_

_She snatched the remote out of his hands, pressing the power button purposefully. "Can't you just turn it off?"_

"_I wish it were that easy, Is… Bella. It's not something that I can turn off."_

"_Have you ever heard my brain before? I mean, not just the color thingy?"_

_He shook his head slowly and I felt a faint wave of chagrin from him._

"_Why not?"_

_The question gave him pause. Obviously he didn't want to blurt out the truth, which was because he'd despised her very presence in our lives and had avoided her at every turn, but she was obviously an intelligent child, so he'd have to make the lie believable. "Well, when you were a baby, your thoughts weren't quite as well formed as they are now, and I couldn't read them. And now, it just didn't seem polite to do so without permission."_

_It would've been a good excuse, if he hadn't just told her that he had absolutely no control of his ability. And perhaps with a child who hadn't been raised by a house full of quick-witted vampires, it'd still have worked. But judging by the concise clarity of her words and her lexicon, it was obvious that Carlisle had been teaching her personally. She bristled beside me._

"_You know what else isn't polite, Edward?" By his shocked expression, he'd plucked the answer out of her head already. I was, however, quite curious as to what she was thinking that'd warrant that particular face. "Lying. Mommy says that lying is not a good thing to do at all." She frowned, something striking her suddenly. "Unless it's to keep our big secret." _

_Our big secret. That was a nice way of putting things._

"_You're right, Bella. I'm sorry that I lied to you." _

_If he was hoping that his apology would end the discussion, he was sorely mistaken. Curiosity was surrounding the child like a bubble, the edges tinged with expectation. Edward capitulated with a heavy sigh. _

_"I've never had the opportunity to read your mind before now because I was never close enough to do so." _

_"Why?" she asked curiously._

_"Because I was avoiding you."_

_"Why?"_

_"Because I didn't like you."_

_I could sense no malicious intent behind the words, he was just being honest with her, as she'd requested._

_Emmett's low growl echoed throughout the room and he took a menacing step forward. I glanced at him in surprise. I'd known he was protective, but I'd yet to see firsthand just how much. _

_Bella smiled sweetly at him, revealing small gaps where she was missing several of her front teeth._

"_It's okay, Emmett, sometimes the truth is not nice." She turned back to Edward. "Well, Edward, thank you for telling me the truth." She patted his arm, like she might a puppy's head, her little hand tapping against his marble skin. "Just so you know, I still love you." His words had incited a brief wave of hurt and confusion, but if there was one thing I'd learned in the past hour, it was that the child's emotions were dynamic, never lingering upon one for more than a few seconds. As quickly as the wound had appeared, it was patched with her enthusiasm and she turned to me excitedly._

"_Jasper, can you teach me how to ride a horse? Alice says you used to be a real live cowboy!"_

_A cowboy? Alice and I were going to have a talk later._

"_I don't know if you'd call me a cowboy, really," I replied stiffly, avoiding her question._

_She saw right through my evasion._

"_Do you know how to ride a horse?"_

_I shifted uncomfortably. "Well, yes."_

_She climbed up to her knees, clinging to my shirt as she brought her little face close to mine. Her breath smelled sweetly, and I didn't doubt for a second that Emmett had been sneaking her candy before dinner. She suddenly threw her warm arms around my neck and rested her chin on my shoulder. Her chocolate eyes widened and she peered up at me pleadingly._

"_Please, please, Jasper, teach me how to ride a horse?"_

_It was right then, that very moment that I was lost. As she peered at me with such trust, such excitement, I realized why I'd felt so uncomfortable in her presence. Beneath the fleeting, fickle surface of her interchangeable emotions, one very prominent feeling lingered, never wavering. _

_Love. _

_She loved me. And Edward, and Emmett. Carlisle, Esme, Alice and Rosalie._

_We were her family._

_And though Edward and I had studiously avoided her for five years, we were her brothers, and she still selflessly offered us that unconditional familial love that we'd been denying her._

_Edward must've picked up on my thoughts, as I felt an incredible wave of regret, followed swiftly by longing roll off of him. He suddenly stole the girl from me, setting her gently in his lap. She giggled, pleased by his sudden acceptance._

"_What about the piano, Bella? Would you like to learn to play?"_

_Her eyes widened and she nodded, loosing a little squeal as she looked at Emmett. "Hear that, Em? I get to play the piano!"_

"_I hear that, Bells." Emmett was smiling indulgently and I could feel the tension caused by our previous dissention ease. _

_I scowled at Edward, reaching over and tugging Bella back to me, wrapping my arms lightly around her. I had to remember, she was still a human, a human child, and quite breakable at that. _

"_But first, you'll learn to ride a horse," I promised. I suddenly felt like I had a lot of time to make up for. _

"_Piano first," Edward argued, obviously feeling the same as I._

"_Horse."_

"_Piano."_

_Suddenly Emmett was across the room, scooping the girl up to hold her by her ankles in the air._

"_First, wrestling!" He declared with a booming laugh._

_Panic flooded me. Whether from Emmett's actions or his words, I couldn't decide. Bella laughed, thrashing wildly against Emmett's hold and despite common sense arguing loudly against my sudden, irrational dread, all I could imagine was his hands slipping… Her fragile little skull, the floor. _

_I jerked to my feet, ripping her out of his grasp, just as Edward stood, I assumed, to do the same._

"_Emmett! Be careful!" I admonished, cradling the child to my chest. _

_Edward fussed over her, tucking her hair neatly back into place with his cool hands, straightening her clothes, while Emmett just laughed and collapsed onto the couch, grabbing the abandoned remote. _

It'd been the beginning of twelve wonderful years. We'd taught her everything we could, all of us.

Carlisle imparting his knowledge of science and logic; Esme her wonderful sense of compassion and love. Emmett had taught her what he could about sports (though the girl's inherent clumsiness made that a rather futile attempt. Poor Alice had tried (was still trying) to convince Bella that just because clothing was comfortable did not mean it was fashionable. Rosalie had reminded our sister everyday to appreciate her humanity. Edward had taught her of all things beautiful; music and art, books and poetry. And I…What had I brought to our relationship? I shook my head, unable to decipher any qualities in myself that I'd wish to instill in her.

I came to a halt, scowling. Maybe I'd be able to concentrate if that incessant thudding would stop for just a second, I thought irritably.

It took perhaps a millisecond for the significance of that beating to take hold in my quick, vampire mind, and I was ripping through the woods in search of its source.

_Bella, Bella, Bella._ I chanted silently as I neared the faltering, labored heart.

"Here!" I roared, my shout echoing like a thunder crack through the quiet forest.

And there she was.

Pale, still as death, she was curled onto her side in the underbrush. Her breathing was shallow, gasping and labored as it forced its way in and out of her lungs.

"Bella," I murmured brokenly, as the frantic steps of the others began to approach.

I dropped to my knees at her side, running my cool fingers over her forehead. She was burning to the touch, even more so than usual, and I jerked my hand away with a hiss.

Edward was next to arrive and he immediately leaned down to draw her into his arms. I halted him with a mute shake of my head.

_Wait for Carlisle. If it's a neck or back injury…_

He recoiled at the idea of hurting her further.

It felt like hours passed, as we waited for the others, though I knew it couldn't have been more than a few seconds. Rosalie burst through the trees, Emmet close behind, crying sharply, "Is she…?"

"She's alive," I hastily advised, "But something's wrong with her."

Rosalie gave a short pained gasp, and stumbled toward us. She knelt at Bella's head, leaning over the girl she'd come to think of not only as a little sister, but a daughter. Her distress was a palpable thing as she stroked Bella's forehead, whispering that it would be alright.

Emmett shifted from foot to foot, anxious for some way to help.

Alice slid in next to Emmett, her eyes flashing wildly, blank one moment, coherent the next. I frowned and glanced at Edward for help reading her.

_What's up with Alice?_

"The visions are changing. Rapidly. She can barely get a hold of them," he murmured, slipping his hand into Bella's.

Carlisle was suddenly at my side, kneeling beside Bella's prone form.

"What's wrong with her?" Emmett demanded.

"Give me a second, Emmett, and I'll tell you," Carlisle replied tersely. It was the closest to anger I'd ever felt him achieve with one of his children.

He ran his hands lightly over Bella, performing perfunctory examinations of the placement of her bones and organs.

"She's really warm," I declared, feeling rather foolish as soon as the words had left my mouth.

"Yeah, Jasper, she's _alive_," Emmett replied sarcastically.

I growled a low warning in his direction. Now was not the time.

Carlisle placed a hand lightly on one of Bella's pale cheeks, nodding slightly.

"Actually, Jasper, I think you're right. I can't be certain by touch, obviously, but she may have a fever. I don't think anything's broken." He reached down to take Bella in his arms, and Rosalie snarled softly. I was shocked by her bestial behavior toward Carlisle, but he just smiled gently and nodded, allowing Rosalie to gather Bella close. We stood, relieved to have found her alive, but all of us curious as to her condition and what had happened.

"We need to get her back to the house," Carlisle declared unnecessarily. Rose was already sprinting through the trees. I glanced at Edward worriedly.

_What do you suppose is wrong?_

He shrugged, shaking his head, before following swiftly on Rose's heels. The others filed after them, leaving me alone in the small clearing.

I cast my eyes to the ground where I'd found Bella, and a small silvery glint caught my eye. I knelt slowly, running my hand carefully over the matted grass, grasping at the metal that caught my sleeve. Straightening, I frowned at the delicate platinum bracelet dangling from my fingers, a single charm, the Cullen family crest shining gently in the moonlight.

I tucked the bauble in my pocket, sprinting after the others.

Bella would want it back when she awoke.

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**A/N: Yes, no, maybe? Give me a review and let me know. :)**


	2. You Give Me Fever

**A/N: Woo woo! Here's Chapter Two. 6,112 words, according to my computer. It pretty much wrote itself, and I think it turned out pretty well. Give it a read and let me know what you think. Also, some credit to my beta/husband for sending me an E-mail at work about a high school full of boys with holes punched through their chests. :) You'll see what I mean.**

**Reviews are like chocolate for the brain. Head's up.**

**Minor Edits: 12/16/2011**

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Calefaction

Chapter Two

You Give Me Fever

Jasper POV

The house was bustling with activity when I arrived; you'd think I'd been thirty minutes rather than thirty seconds behind the rest of my family.

My sensitive hearing picked up on their unique physical signatures as they dealt with our predicament in the best ways they knew how.

There was Emmett's heavy tread as he paced impatiently somewhere on the second floor. The barest whisper of Rose's fingers threading through Bella's curls. Esme, humming quietly in the kitchen as she prepared what would probably amount to a small feast. The murmur of Carlisle's thoughtful voice as he gathered the necessary equipment for Bella's prognosis. Hm, Edward and Alice were incredibly silent, but it didn't take much for me to imagine them sitting at Bella's bedside, two solicitous statues; Alice desperately trying to see the outcome of today's occurrences while Edward sought to glean the answers from her mind.

Their emotions, as ranged and varied as their activities, assaulted me as I stepped over the threshold of our front door, and I staggered slightly beneath the unwitting attack. Small flickers of hope were crushed beneath rampant fear. The barest flutter of relief wound its way around a threatening rumble of anger. I took a swift, unnecessary breath as the chaos descended, blocking what I could while attempting to tamp down on my own unstable emotions, which could only be feeding the discord.

Carlisle's footsteps were moving, and I mentally followed them from his study into Bella's room. They slowed as he neared the bed, and a primal, territorial growl caused them to stop all together. Rosalie.

Emmett's concern was drowned in a sudden wave of fury. "Jesus Christ, Rose, would you stop it already? What? You think petting her hair is gonna make her better? Get the fuck out of the way so Carlisle can see what's wrong!"

Silence fell heavily over the house for a second, two…

An ear-splitting crash reverberated sharply as my siblings collided, the floorboards overhead shuddering and groaning in protest. I listened as they grappled, breaking apart only after the sound of cracking stone, followed quickly by Rose's pained gasp, could be heard. I was mildly surprised; after all these years Rose's pride still wouldn't allow her to admit that Emmett was at least twice as strong as she was. I'd warned her numerous times over the years, during sparring sessions, not to allow herself to be confined to close quarters with him. Once he got his arms around you… Well, Rose was probably recovering from a cracked rib or two about now.

Emmett growled, and there was a savage smile in his voice as he murmured, "Come get some, baby."

Rose shrieked furiously in response and seconds later the sound of shattering glass caused me to wince.

I shook my head with a sigh; it was typical behavior of them. I only hoped that they didn't destroy anything irreplaceable or Bella would be pissed.

If she woke.

_When_ she woke, I corrected myself silently.

Emmett laughed, taunting Rose even further into an already blinding rage. Wood splintered, cracking loudly, and the walls along the east side of the house shook. Esme was going to have her work cut out for her tomorrow. Assuming the house was still standing.

Perhaps it was the undeniably entertaining show that my siblings were putting on, or maybe the distraction of the fear we'd allowed to consume us, but the quiet, breathless whimper that passed Bella's lips went unnoticed by those in her attendance. I grimaced as the small, pained sound hit me like a blow. My first instinct was to run to her side, to demand to know what had hurt her, and to crush it. But Emmett had been right, if a bit cruel, in his protest that there was little any of us, except for Carlisle, could do to help Bella at the moment.

Though that wasn't precisely true, was it? There was one thing I could do. It was just going to be a bit more difficult than usual.

I drew a slow breath, letting the familiar scents of my home, my coven, my family wash over me. My hand closed over the doorjamb and I felt the wood give easily beneath my fingers, leaving a deep imprint.

My eyes drifted shut, blocking the dim overhead lights as I slipped into my mind, the physical world slipping away slowly. The sound of Emmett and Rose, snarling insults at one another faded, as did Carlisle's quiet, firm insistence that they 'cease immediately'.

I quickly accessed the immense stores of my memories, flipping through them as easily as I would a rolodex. I needed something just right… Not that, not that… I had to have something in here.

A memory, short but undeniably sweet popped up and a nostalgic smile tugged at my lips.

This ought to do…

_The sun had finally decided to make an appearance after thirteen solid weeks of rain. One would think, considering that we can't maintain our normal human façade in the face of solar light, that this would be a good thing; more precipitation, more human. And that was all quite true. But Bella, poor sweet Bella, absolutely hated being confined to the house by the weather._

_So when the sun escaped its nearly perpetual prison of cloud cover to grace the dense greenery with its luminous face, Bella was beside herself. She'd demanded, and I mean demanded, that we go on a family outing. A bit of hiking, and a picnic. Due to Bella's non-existent coordination, hiking had taken on the same definition as riding around on one of our backs._

_Esme stuffed a wicker basket with blankets and more food than a slender, ten year old girl could possibly even imagine eating, while Rosalie slicked Bella's fair skin down with sun screen. She may not be one of us, but she certainly looked the part. Alice had taken an hour, fifty-eight minutes of which Bella had been complaining, dressing her little doll in clothing she had described as 'outdoor chic'. I was pretty sure that she'd made that term up. Why it'd taken an hour to outfit Bella in a pair of khaki shorts and a pink hooded t-shirt was beyond any of us. Bella seemed to be of a similar opinion as she slunk sulkily down the stairs._

_"Heya Bells, why the long face?" Emmett demanded as he pushed the stool next to him toward her with his foot. She hopped up, filling her cereal bowl to the brim before sloshing milk all over the kitchen's center island. I slipped in beside her, reaching up to wipe a small white streak of lotion off her cheek as she heaped a giant bite onto her spoon._

_"Oh you know how Alice is," she said, mouth full. "My pigtails are so tight that it feels like my hair's about to fall out."_

_I examined her head, chuckling as I noticed the roots of her hair stretched taut from her scalp._

_Emmett was doing the same, shaking his head and tsking under his breath. He suddenly leaned close to Bella, his voice lowering to a conspiratorial murmur, "Well, you know what I think about that?"_

_She peered up at him with wide innocent eyes that sparkled with mischief. "What?"_

_"EMMETT!" Alice shrieked, and I heard her feet on the stairs just as Emmett's hand rose swiftly and he snapped the small rubber binders that held Bella's hair into two divided sections. He combed through her curls, rubbing her scalp lightly._

_"Better?"_

_She giggled, nodding as she turned back to her breakfast enthusiastically._

_"Emmett! It took me a half hour to get that done perfectly!" Alice griped from the kitchen doorway._

_"She didn't like it!" Emmett shrugged, unapologetic as ever._

_Bella nearly choked on her cereal as she hastily turned to face a rather crestfallen Alice._

_"That's not true at all, Ali. I told him not to," Bella nodded solemnly, though she struggled with laughter when Emmett growled softly at her betrayal._

_Never mind the fact that Alice had undoubtedly heard the entire conversation, even from upstairs._

_I interjected bemusedly, "You know, darlin', I seem to remember you chastising Edward once upon a time for lying to you to spare your feelings."_

_Bella flushed brightly and ducked her head, fiddling with the delicate bracelet encircling her wrist. I chuckled at her response. Her conscience was always her undoing. The poor girl couldn't lie to save her life._

_She sighed heavily, finally nodding her agreement with my words. "Alright, alright. It's just that it kinda hurts my head when you put my hair like that, Alice. But you know, I think it looks really good."_

_Alice's soft, melodic laughter brightened the atmosphere of the kitchen as she flitted in, brushing a kiss to the top of Bella's head._

_"S'ok, sis. This way looks pretty, too. Maybe Emmett's found his calling. Emmett the hair stylist."_

_Emmett grunted, while Bella laughed into her cereal bowl._

_"We should really get going, the sunshine will only last until…Three seventeen this afternoon," our little meteorologist declared._

_Rosalie had appeared, brandishing the SPF 70, and rushed to hastily wipe down Bella's legs with more coconut scented protection from the sun while she wolfed down the rest of her breakfast._

_We headed out of into the sunny afternoon, in good spirits. Bella clung to Emmett's back, giggling as every so often she'd attempt to poke her finger in his ear and he'd turn and snap playfully at her hand. I wasn't the biggest proponent for Emmett being Bella's transportation, considering the unnecessary risks he always seemed to take with her (much to her usual delight) but he'd insisted. They were practically joined at the hip. I had to say, I honestly felt sorry for Bella when she tried to start dating. If Emmett wasn't able to intimidate potential mates away from Bella, I wouldn't put it past him to use whatever means necessary. I briefly imagined a high school corridor, piled high with the bodies of Bella's short-lived boyfriends, holes punched straight through them. Laughter met the idea and I turned to grin at Edward._

_"Oh, that most certainly will be the case," he agreed._

_"What will be the case?" Bella inquired curiously._

_"Oh, nothing," I shook my head, not even wanting to put the idea of dating out there for Emmett to protest. Not that I'd be particularly happy when it happened, but no one saw Bella quite the way that Emmett did._

_"C'mon," she pleaded with a little pout._

_The lip came out and Edward caved. "Oh, Jasper was just thinking that it will be quite amusing when you come of an age to start dating."_

_Emmett visibly stiffened, angry disbelief radiating out from him like a shield. I almost laughed, but the look on his face held me back. He suddenly dragged Bella off his back, cradling her to his chest, causing her to wince._

_"Geesh, Em, take it easy, you're gonna break something!" She declared, wriggling against his grip. This of course had Rosalie and Esme at his side in an instant, fussing over the girl. Emmett shook them off with a scowl, loosening his arms slightly. He looked down at Bella with such fierce protectiveness that I can honestly say I pitied anyone who ever thought to harm our human in any way._

_"You are never, never, allowed to date, do you understand me, Bella?" He all but growled._

_Carlisle's shoulders shook gently and Alice hid a smile behind her hand. _

_Bella nodded gently, reaching up to touch Emmett's cheek with her warm little fingers, a smile of pure innocence playing on her lips. "Of course, Em. Boys are pretty gross anyway."_

_"Yes, yes they are," he agreed._

_There was no more mention of the possibility of Bella's finding a potential mate. We had years for that, anyway._

_Edward and Carlisle were speaking of some scientific something or another, while Bella and Emmett were playing a word association game that had her laughing every few seconds. Rosalie and Esme were discussing the nutritional value of different meats and Alice was dancing around us, smiling serenely. I was filled with an amazing swell of love for these beings that comprised my family, and I smiled, allowing the emotion to spread to them._

_Esme smiled warmly at me, falling back to wrap her arm around my shoulder._

_"Thank you, Jasper," she murmured quietly near my ear._

_I glanced at her curiously. "Thank you?"_

_"Mmhmm. For being so wonderfully selfless."_

_I shook my head, surprised by her words, but didn't dispute them. She wouldn't have allowed me to, and I felt she was right to a certain extent, though I would never willingly admit it._

_I shielded my family, to the best of my ability, from any emotion I felt that may be unpleasant for them. Grief, anger, frustration, I kept the feelings to myself, sharing only agreeable things such as love, happiness, and calm. Yet I was forced to endure everything they felt, be it uncomfortable for me or not, just as Edward was often forced to hear things that he may not want to. It was difficult, and sometimes pretty damned miserable, but it never really occurred to me to mention it to them._

_I smiled and wrapped my arm around Esme in return, "Thank you."_

_She ruffled my hair affectionately, before turning back to her conversation with Rosalie._

_We arrived perhaps thirty minutes later, going at a relatively normal pace for the sake of Bella's equilibrium, in a brightly lit clearing, just north of our home. We generally bought quite a bit of land with the houses we purchased, to ensure sufficient hunting possibilities as well as to give ourselves a bit of room to stretch our legs._

_The trees thinned into a grassy meadow, and Bella began to squirm against Emmett's hold as soon as her soft, dark gaze swept the verdant area, with its brilliantly colored wildflowers and small bubbling stream. It was beautiful._

_Emmett and Bella were laughing as he sped out of the cover of the wooded area into the clearing. Carlisle smiled, watching the two of them, and I sensed a sudden surge of happiness from him. To think we'd ever rejected the idea of taking Bella into our lives; I couldn't imagine an existence without her now._

_Esme began to spread the blankets onto the ground and I knelt to help her, setting out containers of interesting smelling dishes for Bella to pick at when she got hungry._

_Emmett, Alice, and Bella were throwing a Frisbee back and forth, under the watchful eye of Rosalie, and I reclined beneath the shade of a towering oak, leaning against its solid trunk as the brilliant light from above warmed my cool skin. Carlisle and Esme retreated to sit beside the stream, hand in hand, gazing at each other adoringly as they spoke of his work at the hospital. Edward flopped down beside me, picking idly at the grass as he slipped a book out of the large basket and flipped it open._

_Here, in this place, with the soft laughter echoing, with Edward lying beside me, and Esme and Carlisle watching over us all, I could almost, almost pretend that we were just your normal everyday family. Esme and Carlisle were the loving parents of six growing children, providing us with a wonderful life._

_"Aren't they?" Edward queried in response to the unspoken images in my mind._

_I laughed wryly, the sarcastic edge coloring my thoughts not nearly enough to dispel the pleasant atmosphere of the meadow. "In a way, yes, I suppose they are," I agreed reluctantly. "But it's not the same. A few of you are Carlisle's progeny, but you're not his children; which is good, because that'd make his relationship with Esme a little…unconventional." Edward chuckled, glancing at the couple. "And we may consider ourselves a family, rather than a coven, but that doesn't make us normal. Even taking into account or 'vegetarian' lifestyle, animal blood isn't the choice of most suburban families when it's dinner time." _Not to mention human blood, when our baser instincts take over_, I thought bitterly._

_"None of us has made such a mistake in many years Jasper. We are better than the monsters you make us out to be. We choose to be better."_

_He was right, I knew, but the guilt I felt when I thought of the humans I'd killed hadn't lessened over the years. Our 'mistakes' meant the end of a human's life. Perhaps, in the grand scheme of things, one mortal wasn't a great loss, but over the years I'd certainly racked up more than my fair share of 'mistakes'… and not-so-mistakes. If not for Alice… Well, I'd have been responsible for more 'mysterious disappearances' than I cared to contemplate. I only hoped that my remorse was genuine; that it stemmed from acknowledgment of my actions as wrong, rather than feeling it because it was expected of me._

_"If you truly felt no remorse, you would not have ceased such behaviors," Edward advised._

_I nodded. Yeah. If I'd really wanted to, I could've joined a nomadic coven and glutted myself on human blood. The Cullens weren't the only means of escaping Maria; they were the most convenient to present itself, but they certainly weren't my only choice. Yet here I was. Because I wanted to be here._

_"Because you're a Cullen."_

_I smiled over at him, nodding._

_Several hours later, as the sun was finally beginning to falter beneath the assault of the darkening clouds, we all lay in repose. Bella was curled quietly against my side, resting her head against my shoulder, blinking slowly as though she were growing tired. A small crown of wildflowers that Alice had laced together was nestled in her hair, partially hiding the darkening bruise on her forehead that Emmett had given her when he'd thrown the Frisbee a little too enthusiastically. Rose couldn't seem to keep her eyes off the mark; she'd glare at it furtively, before turning the same expression on Emmett, who was either extremely unobservant, or was immune to Rosalie's fury after all these years._

_I looked down in surprise when I felt small fingertips gliding over my forearm._

_"Jasper?" Bella inquired, quietly._

_"Hmm?" I tucked a strand of hair lightly behind her ear._

_"How come I have to have plain old not sparkly skin?"_

_I frowned in confusion. She knew that our skin was like this due to our vampirism, why was she asking that? I glanced at Edward, who was staring at the child as though she'd just committed some terrible crime. He shook his head fiercely, dropping his book and suddenly leaning forward to grab Bella forcibly by the shoulders so that she turned to look him in the face._

_"Never!" He hissed softly, giving her a gentle shake. "Never! Do you understand me, Bella?"_

_I stared at him, surprised. What was he going on about now? I pried his fingers away from her, tugging her protectively against my side._

_"Edward," I admonished._

_Bella sniffled, and I glanced down, astonished. She almost never cried. What was going on?_

_"You don't know what she was thinking," he growled softly, his fingers clenching into tight fists._

_I glanced at Carlisle, who looked just as confused as I felt, and then to Alice. A small smile curled upon her lips as she gazed at Bella, but she remained silent._

_"What was she thinking?" Rosalie demanded._

_Edward shook his head stiffly. "It's not something that will be discussed."_

_Bella's little chin went up and she glared at him defiantly._ _"I want to know when you will make me like you," she declared with ringing clarity._

_Edward growled softly, ripping a handful of grass from the ground by its roots. Rosalie shook her head mutely, an expression of pained shock on her face._

_"Never, Bella! This is not something you want. You will remain human."_ _Edward's voice brooked no argument._

_"I'll die," she whispered sadly. "I don't want to leave you, any of you." There was a thickness to her tone that I suspected was an indication of tears to come._

_"That is how it's meant to be," Rosalie murmured._

_"It's my decision!" Bella shouted, suddenly pushing herself to her feet, trembling softly as her little heart raced wildly with her agitation. I reached up to place a calming hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged me off. "I want to be like you!"_

_Edward snarled softly, "You want to be a monster, Bella?"_

How hypocritical of you,_ I remarked idly in my mind. _Not an hour ago, you quite passionately informed me that I was wrong to label us monsters.

_"This is different," he hissed, too quickly for Bella to hear._

Edward, always playing the role of tortured saint. Give it up already_._

_He looked as though he wanted to punch me, but Bella was demanding his attention._

_Shock was her primary emotion; it mingled with confusion as she took a tentative step forward, placing her small hand against Edward's cheek. She was shaking her head slowly, brows drawn together in bewilderment, as though she couldn't quite understand the language he was speaking. "Monster?" she echoed. "You think that you're a monster? You think that Mom is a monster? And Dad? He saves people's lives! I don't think you understand what a monster is."_

_He shook his head, dislodging her touch. "We drink blood, Bella, did you know that? We've killed humans, all of us. Humans like you."_

_"Edward!" Carlisle's tone indicated that Edward had crossed the line; I didn't disagree._

_Bella seemed unfazed by the declaration that had obviously been meant to terrify her. In fact, there was a notable absence of fear; I could sense only calm acceptance, as well as her pervasive confusion._

_"But you don't anymore, Edward. You're good vampires."_

_"There's no such thing," he replied harshly._

_Bella laughed softly, a tinkling, melodic sound that made my chest tighten with an unnamed emotion._

_"Oh, Edward. Have you ever stopped thinking about all of the bad things you've done and thought about the good ones, instead?"_

_He stared at her, uncomprehending. It was put in such childish, simple language, and yet he couldn't understand what she was asking of him. I almost laughed._

_"Well," she sighed, sensing his confusion, "you've killed people right?"_

_He grimaced, turning his face away from her._

_"You're a vampire, Edward, stop being silly. You killed people, like sometimes mom makes me a hamburger, right?"_

_"Humans are not animals!" He snapped sharply, his fingers closing over her tiny shoulders once more._

_She nodded slowly. "Okay, well no, a person isn't really a cow, that's not what I meant." Her cheeks were rosy with her faux pas. "I just meant, that's the thing that you normally need to eat. I need plants and animals, and you need people."_

_"We don't need people."_

_"How many vampires don't eat people?" she retaliated._

_Emmett chuckled._

_"Not many," Edward reluctantly admitted._

_"So you used to just eat what was normal to you, and now you feel bad about it, so you stopped."_

_"Right," he reluctantly agreed, obviously suspecting she had something up her sleeve. He was peering intently at her face, trying to get the information out of her mind, no doubt._

_"So, am I a bad person for eating chicken?"_

_"Well, no, but it's not the…" She cut him off, placing her little hand over his mouth. I heard Esme choke back laughter, and with Edward's expression I found myself doing the same._

_"So, how can you be bad for eating what you were supposed to?"_

_Carlisle's voice was bemused, "That's a good point, Bella."_

_Edward shot him a glare._

_"I just think that you've done a lot of good stuff since then, Edward. Doesn't any of that good stuff make up for the bad stuff? At all?"_

_He shook his head sullenly, still silent behind her hand._

_"Well, now you're just being stupid," she declared with an air of finality._

_"Don't waste your breath, darlin'," I advised. "Edward likes feeling bad about what he's done."_

_Bella seemed shocked. "He likes feeling bad?" Edward was glaring daggers at me._

_"Don't, Jasper," Esme cautioned softly._

_I nodded, shrugging. Perhaps now was not the best time to explain the whole martyr bit._

_"Bella," Carlisle said gently, dragging her into his lap and smiling down into her face. "One day, when you're old enough, we'll have this discussion again, alright? We're not allowed to turn children into vampires, it's against our laws. But you are correct, it should be your decision, and when the time comes, we will allow you to make that decision. Does that sound fair?"_

_Bella nodded, flinging her arms around his neck and hugging him._

_Edward and Rosalie were furious, Alice bemused, and Emmett excited, probably by the prospect of being able to protect Bella for eternity._

_Esme stroked Bella's hair away from her face, gently, humming quietly. Bella smiled, her eyelids beginning to droop. The gentle rhythm of her heart slowed, and her breathing evened. It was only a matter of minutes before she'd dropped into slumber. As we all watched her, the ambience began to shift from agitation to adoration. Every eye, golden or black, that gazed upon the child held love beyond anything we could've expected to feel for her._

_Calmness stole over us as we each made our personal, silent vows to keep her safe._

I recalled the emotion with all of the clarity of my vampiric mind, breathing slowly as I let the feeling tingle through my limbs, and then outward. It spread slowly, like honey, throughout our home, dislodging the icy chill of fear with warm fingers. Esme exhaled gently as peace began to steal through the house. I heard Rose and Emmett disengage, and Carlisle's murmur of relief.

I stepped over the threshold, continuing to exude the emotion as I wandered through the hall and up the stairs. Bella's heart was beating more quickly than normal, I thought, but not alarmingly so.

I came to stand in the door of the nearly demolished room, arching a brow at the fairly recalcitrant pair of Emmett and Rosalie, before turning to watch Carlisle's examination of Bella. As I'd predicted, Edward and Alice sat side by side, silently, in the window seat. Alice's eyes were blank, and Edward was staring at her intensely.

The thermometer that Carlisle held in Bella's ear beeped, and he pulled it out, glancing at the small readout, his eyes widening.

"This can't be right," he muttered softly, pressing a button that I assumed reset the device before putting it back in her ear.

"What, what is it?" Emmett demanded, taking a step forward, glass crunching underfoot.

Carlisle shook his head. "Let me double check."

The object beeped again, and we all leaned forward.

"Jesus," Carlisle breathed, staring at the reading.

"What?" Rosalie cried.

Carlisle never had the chance to respond.

I noticed the sudden acceleration of her heart, just before she began thrashing.

I stared in horror as Bella's eyes flew wide open, though they were blind to her surroundings. Her lips parted, breath catching for half a second, before she began to scream.

Edward jerked to his feet, staring at Bella in horror. "There's something wrong, Carlisle! She thinks…What she's seeing in her mind, she can't tell what's real and what's not," he cried anxiously.

She was trembling now, panting.

"She's hallucinating?" I clarified quietly, stepping forward, desperate to help, but unsure of what I could even do.

"What was the temperature today?" Carlisle questioned, and I glanced at him as though he'd lost his mind. Why would that possibly be relevant? I looked at my siblings, who were in turn, looking at one another.

"Esme!" He called swiftly, "What was the temperature today?" It was obvious that none of us were going to be of any use. The weather held little interest to us, other than whether or not the sun would be out. Temperature was extraneous information.

"Ninety three!" She called back. I wondered where she'd looked it up.

"Ninety three?" Carlisle murmured, more to himself than anyone else. I thought it seemed unusually warm for the small Washington town.

Bella jerked, coughing suddenly. Alice gave a frightened cry, "Turn her on her side! Now! NOW!"

I flew from my place at the door, my hands bruising as I swiftly shoved Bella from her back to her side. Just as her head lolled so that her cheek hit the pillow a thin stream of vomit escaped her lips. I stared in horror. She would've choked…

"Carlisle," I growled softly. "What's wrong with her?"

She shuddered, gagging as more of the liquid poured from her mouth. I held her over the edge of the bed, pulling her hair away from the flow.

"How long was she outside today?" Carlisle asked urgently.

I tried to think of when I'd seen her last. I frowned. Sometime this morning? I meticulously ran through the day in my mind. It was nine thirty, now.

The five of us answered at precisely the same time, "Twelve hours."

"Did she eat this morning?"

I shook my head as Bella mewled, clutching at my arm with burning fingers. What the hell did this even matter? Why wasn't he doing something?

Alice responded, "A little, some toast, I think."

I could practically hear Carlisle's mind working as he went through her symptoms and the information he'd gathered.

"I believe, she's suffering from heat stroke," Carlisle murmured finally.

As if his proclamation had somehow angered the object of its diagnosis, Bella began to shake violently in my grip.

"Carlisle!" I exclaimed, staring down at her flushed face with horror.

"Rose! Go run a cool bath. Not cold, cool! Emmett, put some ice in a few plastic bags and wrap them in damp cloths!"

Alice was gasping softly, panting as she gripped the edge of her seat.

Edward looked pained by whatever he was seeing in her mind, and he shook his head slowly back and forth.

Carlisle began to dig through the equipment he'd brought.

"Jasper, strip her down to her under things," he commanded.

Annnnd… I faltered. I stared down at the young woman trembling on the bed. Wouldn't it be better if Alice or Rose…

"Jesus Christ, Jasper," Edward swore softly, suddenly knocking me out of the way as he began to tear Bella's clothes away from her body. "She's dying and you're worried about propriety."

I frowned, feeling equal parts embarrassed and confused. Why had I even…what did it matter? I could barely sort through the emotions and thoughts that flashed through me.

"We need to get her into the tub, now!" Carlisle nearly growled as the thermometer beeped again. "One oh three point nine," he breathed.

Edward gathered her into his arms, hissing, I guessed from the heat of her skin.

He ran from the room, and I leapt after him. Rose was standing beside the half full tub, glaring at it for daring to not fill as quickly as she liked. She shrugged helplessly. Not everything was able to achieve the speed we were, I thought wryly.

"It's good enough," Carlisle declared. "We need to get her temperature down now. Much longer like this and she could sustain brain damage."

If I could've paled, I'm certain I would've just then.

"Someone needs to get in with her, she's prone to seizure in this state."

It couldn't hurt that we were all so cold, either.

Rose glanced into the water, before tentatively edging the toe of her designer shoe in.

I beat her to it. I wanted redemption for my earlier stupidity. I jumped in swiftly, sliding into a reclining position and reaching up to Edward, barely noticing the temperature of the water as it lapped at my skin.

He stared at me quietly for a moment, his expression entirely unreadable, before he handed Bella to me as if she were an ornament of spun glass. I set her between my legs, urging her to lean back against me.

She cried out, tensing as the cool water hit her overheated skin. "No, please," she begged.

"Shhh, Bella, it's okay," I murmured softly near her ear, forcing her further into the water.

"It's too cold! Please!" she gasped.

I glanced at Carlisle, her pleas ripping right through my heart. His mouth was set in a grim line, and he was looking away. It was obvious that her pleading had a similar effect on him, but this was apparently necessary.

Bella's soft protestations continued as the water rose, covering more and more of her fevered skin. She thrashed wildly, and I wrapped my arms around her waist, not wanting her to hurt herself. Rose finally hit the tap to turn the water off when it came to lap at our chests.

I whispered soft, comforting words, even as I confined her to the cold prison of the bathtub. I should've let Rosalie do this, I thought sullenly, and Edward chuckled, though I noticed a hardness in his gaze as he looked at us. I would have to remember to ask him about that.

He was sitting on the toilet, Emmett and Rosalie standing in the doorway, all three of them watching us, while Carlisle hovered, continually checking Bella's temperature. I felt a bit like some type of side show exhibition.

"How is she doing, Carlisle?" Emmett murmured in a voice more quiet than I'd ever heard him use.

Carlisle nodded slowly. "Her temperature is coming down. One oh two point two. We're going to give it a few more minutes and we'll get her out of there."

Bella stirred restlessly in my arms, and I glanced at her worriedly. Her cheeks were still pink, but not nearly the frightening crimson color they'd been earlier.

"Bella?" I murmured.

"Jasper," she whispered in return.

"She's coherent," I nodded at Carlisle.

Edward was frowning. He quickly interjected, staring at Bella, "She's not."

"She just said my name," I argued.

He appeared to be gritting his teeth. "I know, but just, please, trust me, she's not quite there yet."

I glared at him when no further information was forthcoming.

"Jasper," Bella sighed again, shifting against me.

Edward stiffened, looking uncomfortable. What on Earth?

And then I felt it. Sweet Jesus.

Desire. It was subtle, just an undertone, but it was definitely there.

I groaned with the realization of what was happening. Whatever was going on in her mind, set off by her raging fever, it appeared to be something sexual, and it was my name coming out of her lips. I glanced at the ceiling awkwardly.

"Carlisle, I think someone else should get in here with Bella, Rosalie or something."

Apparently he hadn't noticed Bella's odd behavior. Not being able to read her mind or sense her emotions might contribute to that, I thought sourly.

"Just a few more minutes, Jasper," Carlisle was glancing at a legal pad he was writing on.

I didn't want to argue and draw attention to the matter, so I stayed put, Edward's agitation warring with my own.

It felt like an eternity had passed before Carlisle declared that it was safe for us to remove Bella.

Edward jerked her out of my lap almost aggressively and I stared after him as he stalked from the room. What the hell was his problem? It wasn't my fault that Bella, in her crazed hallucinations, was thinking something sexual! Possibly…about me.

I banished the thoughts, the emotions invoked by those ideas weird, uncomfortable, and something else I wouldn't name and refused to examine.

I sloshed my way out of the tub, leaving a wet trail to my room, where I changed into something dry.

Emmett and Rosalie were clearing what they could of the mess they'd made in Bella's room, Alice cleaned the puddle of sick, while Carlisle put Belal to bed, placing the ice packs around her and covering her with a sheet.

Profound relief was the definitive emotion of the hour…aside from one…

I turned slowly to find Edward standing in my doorway.

"Hey," I said quietly.

"What the hell was that?" He demanded furiously, striding into the room, fists clenched at his sides.

I blinked. _What?_

"What did you do to her?" He growled.

_What?_

"I don't know what you're talking about, Edward," I crossed my arms defensively.

"Really? Really? The things that Bella was thinking," he paused, looking both furious and disgusted. "They were too graphic to be the product of her imagination." He took a menacing step toward me.

_Wait…What the fuck? What are you accusing me of?_ I demanded silently, aware that the others could hear us.

"You know exactly what I'm accusing you of," he snarled, pushing me aggressively.

I tried to stay calm, really, I did. _Edward, stop. Whatever you're thinking, you're wrong. I don't even…_ I didn't have coherent thought to defend against his ridiculous accusations.

"Jasper, her thoughts had the clarity of memory, not dream."

He suddenly made to push me again and I reached up instinctively, my fingers closing over his wrists tightly. "Edward, you told Carlisle that she couldn't tell the difference between her mind and reality, wouldn't that apply?"

The suggestion gave him pause enough that I foolishly released his hands.

With a feral roar, he charged, throwing himself at me. The sound of shattering glass was deafening, and then we were falling through the darkness.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I apologize if it was a little evil, leaving it right there, but it was getting crazy long. This story's been coming to be quite easily, so hopefully I'll get you another update soon! I love reviews!**

**Edit: Someone's review on this chapter advised that Edward would be able to see in Jasper's mind and see that nothing happened, thus he had no reason for such anger. However, I always thought Edward's ability was more like, he can only read what people are thinking right then, rather than dig around and see whatever he wants. I suppose he figures that if Jasper isn't thinking about it, possibly even hiding it, it's probably true. Or he's so pissed he's only seeing what he wants. :) Take your pick. **


	3. Wonderland

**A/N: Okay, so I know I promised smut by Chapter 5, but I don't know if I'll be able to deliver! These chapters feel pretty long as it is (almost 7k this time!), and to get the character development where I want it, well, that'd take like, 20k chapters. :P But I promise, lemonade is in the making! Also, I had a few queries as to the relationship status of Alice, Edward & Jasper. They are all unattached. **

**So Chapter 3 here may be a little confusing, feel free to send me a pm with any questions you might have. Hope you enjoy it. :) Give it a read and let me know!**

**Edited: 12/20/2011**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 3

Wonderland

**Bella POV**

I was swimming.

I didn't recall making a conscious decision to go swimming, but that was less alarming than it should've been, considering the past few hours I'd had. (I was assuming it'd been hours, but it really could've been days or even weeks for all I knew) I grappled with my brain, demanding that it separate truth from delirium, but it was either unwilling or unable to comply.

In fact, the last thing I really _remembered_, remembered as solid factual memory, was walking along the property that surrounded our house.

It'd been a rarely gorgeous day, the sun sticking around for longer than just a cameo appearance, and when it'd shone its bright face through our windows, beseeching me to come out and play, I couldn't refuse. There was just the minor, yet impossibly difficult, task of escaping my familial bodyguards long enough to actually enjoy the day. Now, don't get me wrong. I love my family to death; a scarily apt description, and enjoyed their company immensely, but sometimes their constant hovering, and worrying, and examination of everything I put into my mouth could be a bit much. I mean, allowing me a Coke or two couldn't possibly do as much harm as they all claimed it would. Rotten teeth, diabetes and heart failure? The way it'd been described to me, I figured soda should be sold as some type of biological warfare.

Emmett, Rosalie and Mom were the worst.

Mom was mom. From what I'd seen of my friends' mothers, hers was fairly typical behavior. Making sure I'd had enough to eat (no matter how many years passed, I'd never be comfortable sitting at the table with seven other people where I was the only one eating), taking me shopping for the start of the new school year, and ensuring that my siblings didn't pick on me too much. By siblings, of course, I mean Emmett. There was hot chocolate on cold, snowy afternoons, and freshly sliced watermelon in the heat of summer. I loved Esme, and though I'd been adopted, she was the only mother I could ever imagine having and the only one I'd ever want.

And if there was anything she forgot, a rarity I assure you, Rose was right there taking care of it. Some of my earliest memories were of stunning Rosalie, sitting at my bedside with my favorite book, "Squeaker the Mouse and His Orange Spotted Blouse", using that high-pitched voice that I'd always insisted on. That book held a sacred place in my bookshelves. And as the years passed and we moved on from bedtime stories, it became apparent in her actions that Rosalie saw me as more of a daughter than a sister, and that was alright. It's not as though we had the conventional family setting going on anyway.

The only one who really played his role to perfection was Emmett. Oh, Emmett. My crazy, fun-loving older brother. As fiercely protective as any father, yet nuts enough to perform terrifying circus-like stunts with me. Despite his own antics, he was aggressively against me attempting anything dangerous on my own. Roller skating? Whoa there, not unless he was holding my hand. Learning to ride a horse? I seemed to recall an implicit threat regarding the location of Jasper's head on his shoulders if I came back with as much as a bruise. Papier-mâché? Yeah right, the dyes in those papers could penetrate my skin and poison me, never mind the threat of paper cuts. (Though in a house full of vampires, that last one was actually pretty unnerving) I was terrified of the day when I had to tell him that I was interested in someone. To him, no one would ever be good enough for me. He was definitely my closest sibling, though perhaps not always the first I'd confide in.

Edward placed a close fourth on the body-guard chart. Perhaps as sheltering as Emmett, he unfortunately had an incredible weak spot for pouting that made him quite a bit easier to manipulate when I wanted my way. Not that I did that a lot, mind you, but it was useful knowledge when I wanted a Sprite with my salad. He usually caved before I had to stoop to that anyway, what with the ability to read it coming and all. It was hard, sometimes not to begrudge Edward his ability to see and hear everything that passed through my brain, important or not, but it was equally difficult not to pity him. Judging by the pained looks he sometimes assumed, his ability was often just as much a curse as a blessing. He was also very careful to keep others' thoughts to himself. Which was a relief, because we'd spent quite a bit of time together over the years. Edward had always shared the duties of tutor with my dad, Carlisle. He'd taught me to play the piano incredibly well, though it was still a mere shadow in comparison to his own, taken me to theatre and museums, and insisted that every second we spent together be filled with the learning of some beautiful thing.

Alice, Carlisle and Jasper were the least coddling of my family. They seemed to understand that as the years passed I was escaping my infancy and gaining at least _some_ ability to take care of myself. I mean, yeah, I was still as clumsy as ever (too bad vampire grace wasn't contagious), but I could walk out to get the mail without someone holding my hand every step of the way.

Alice was my girly sibling. We'd spent many nights up late giggling, flipping through the latest gossip magazines, and talking about boys (the latter only when Emmett was out hunting). She really seemed enthused about the whole big sister role, so I went to her with questions on all things inherently female. Much to Alice's disappointment, this didn't include clothes or fashion, but I didn't mind letting her groom and dress me every now and again. If there was one thing Alice loved, it was a makeover, and I just didn't have the heart to deny her that happiness. There was only one exception. A boundary which was never crossed. The line which had been drawn since I was perhaps seven years old. Nylon stockings. I refused to wear them. They were tight and they itched, and I was pretty certain a sadistic man must've come up with the idea for them. Not even the infamous Alice sulk worked on me when she set out pair of wildly colored hosiery that would undoubtedly feel as though I'd spent hours wading through poison ivy. She'd proclaimed sagely on more than one occasion that she'd _seen_ me wearing them, sometime in the very near future, and I was about ninety nine percent certain that she was just saying it to get me to cave. But when she wasn't lying about her visions to get me into uncomfortable leg-wear, it was actually pretty useful to have a psychic in the family. I often toyed with the idea that Alice was the least protective of me, because really, she'd know if something were coming. It was quite handy.

Jasper was one of the easiest members of my family to be around. And not just because he had the ability to make me feel as tranquil as a cat lounging in the sun, though that was actually pretty nice. He was just very… uncomplicated. No, that wasn't right. Jasper was probably more complicated than I could even imagine, he was just very good at concealing his emotional baggage. I'd heard the stories of his dark past before he joined the Cullens, and I suspected that he was enjoying the new found peace. He was who I lounged on the couch with, watching television (though he often complained that my channel changing skills were sorely inadequate), and whose room I visited when I wanted some quiet time to just read or think. Jasper didn't push me to fill my short human hours with any and everything. With Jasper I could just be.

And finally, we had Carlisle. Unarguably the father figure of my strange little family. Carlisle and I were as close as a father and daughter could be which actually isn't as close one might think. Don't for a second doubt that I love Carlisle with all of my heart. He is an amazing, loving man who has selflessly given all of himself to ensure the safety of his family. He took in an abandoned human child, after all. But as the years passed, there was a small distance between us that had steadily been growing. It terrified me. This was the man who had taught me to read at the age of four, who had been the unwavering support backing my studies, until I was almost as bored in class as my old vampire siblings. Carlisle taught me the importance of rationality, logic and fairness. He'd bought my first bicycle, bell and streamers, beads on the spokes, the works, and had held onto the seat until I was ready for him to let go. Carlisle was my dad, and I appreciated his steady, enduring presence in our family more than he could ever know.

So when it came time to sneak out of the house for a nice day of sunny fun all to myself, you can see where I might have some problems.

Luck was somehow on my side. A first, I assure you.

Emmett, Rosalie and Edward had gone hunting, and Carlisle was at the hospital. Alice had driven into Seattle to do some shopping, so I'd been left with only Esme and Jasper to contend with. I didn't think Jasper would begrudge me some outdoor time, so really, it was just Esme.

I could still recall the exact skepticism in her sweet voice as I had just put one foot out the back door.

* * *

"_And where do you think you're going, Isabella Cullen?"_

_I tried extremely hard not to look guilty as I turned to face her. "Just out for some sun."_

"_Homework done?"_

"_Mom, it's summer!"_

"_I know Carlisle gave you something to work on."_

_Dang. I'd forgotten all about that. A short compare and contrast essay on the Civil War. "Oh, that. Yeah, can I work on it when I come in?"_

_She smiled indulgently, and I fervently hoped that she would put my love of the sun ahead of the importance of my studies, just this once. _

_Her next line of questioning caused my heart to soar with triumph. I'd definitely won._

"_Sunscreen?"_

_I nodded emphatically. That was one thing that she and Rosalie constantly hounded me on, and the one thing that they didn't need to worry about. I enjoyed the sun, but its accompanying burns were less than my favorite thing. "Oh yeah, SPF five hundred or something."_

_She chuckled. "Have you eaten?"_

"_Breakfast," I replied instantly. Toast counted as breakfast, right? I doubted Mom would agree, so I left my answer vague._

"_Well, it's supposed to be hot today, so promise me you won't stay out too long," she smiled as she spoke, taking a few steps toward me. Her eyes were beautiful in the sunlight, glittering topaz pools that shone brilliantly with her love for me. It made my heart ache to be on the receiving end of such exceptional emotion. Cool, sparkling fingers grazed my cheek and I sighed softly, leaning into the affectionate touch. _

_I smiled in response. "Sure, I'll be in before too long. Just wanted to catch some rays. You know how it is; we probably won't see the sun again for months after this."_

_She nodded her agreement, eying our yard skeptically. "You're probably right. In fact, I think I heard we're in for some thunder storms tonight." Her gaze returned worriedly to my face._

_I hurried to reassure her, hating the idea that she'd be sitting here fretting over my well-being, while I went traipsing about the woods._

"_Mom, I promise, I'll be back way before then, kay?" I hugged her fiercely, and was relieved to see that she looked comforted by the words as I pulled away._

"_Alright, Bella, be careful."_

"_Promise." I crossed my heart and skipped out into the mid-morning sun._

_It was completely perfect. A faint breeze carried the scent of freshly cut grass and miscellaneous flora as it ruffled my hair playfully. The air was dry, and I swore I could actually smell the gentle heat of the sun, devoid of even a hint of rain. Over the years I'd come to accept clouds and precipitation as an inevitability, and honestly, they had a feeling of home to them, but when the sun came out I just couldn't resist its allure._

_I wandered into the greenery surrounding our house, sufficiently confident that Emmett had taught me the way home, regardless of what area of our land I ended up on. _

_My fingertips trailed over the trunks of the trees as I passed them, delighted to find the rough texture not even damp. Birds chirped merrily overhead, and I whistled softly under my breath, inclined to join them. I glanced at the clear blue sky, making up shapes for the cotton-puff clouds, laughing at myself as I decided that most of them were simply 'oddly-shaped cloud'._

_I tried to name the different trees as I passed them, something Jasper had taken to teaching me when we'd walk the area together. Not too surprisingly, I wasn't nearly as good at it as he was. Of course, he had a couple of years on me. _

_The morning wore on and the temperature began to rise, the changes so minute that I didn't even realize how unbearably warm it'd become until the noon sun was beating down on me. _

_When had the gentle morning warmth evolved into this blazing afternoon scorch? I fanned myself futilely, shifting uncomfortably as my hair stuck to the back of my neck, damp and heavy. Grabbing the neck of my tank top, I fluffed it in and out, trying to produce relief from the oppressive, stagnant air. The light wind of earlier was conspicuously absent._

_Definitely time to head home, I thought silently, turning to head back through the trees._

_Apparently, I'd extremely underestimated the impact of incredible heat on one's bearings. I must've stumbled through the woods for over an hour, trying to find my way out, but to my heat-addled brain everything looked the same. Every rock, every tree, every bird. Knowing me, I was probably just walking circles._

_I trudged along listlessly, my face agonizingly warm, my lips dry and parched. _

_Another thirty minutes elapsed and I noticed a definite increase in my stumble ratio. My head was swimming and my calves were starting to ache. _

_How far from the house was I? I was starting to seriously doubt that I had the strength to make it back. Would Esme or Jasper hear for me if I called for them from here? I doubted it, especially considering that my mouth and throat were painfully dry._

_Maybe I just needed to take a little break, I decided, nodding. Yeah, just a couple minutes to gather my wits and I'd start home. Let Mom make me something fruity and cold. _

_I staggered over to a fallen log, intending to make it a seat, but missed it by a long shot and slid to the ground. The soil was slightly damp beneath me, and faintly cool. Despite the hell I knew I'd catch from Alice for destroying these white shorts, I welcomed the temperature change with open arms, going so far as to slide down and rest my face against the earth. _

_I closed my eyes against the blinding light from above. _

_Just a few seconds rest and I'd head home._

_Just a few seconds…_

* * *

Warm, hazy darkness swirled lazily around me. I floated along, allowing the currents to carry me, only partially aware of a voice in the distance calling my name. It seemed to come from so far away, and was distorted, as though I were hundreds of feet below water, and whoever was speaking was on the shore. I didn't try to respond; I knew that they wouldn't be able to hear me, wherever I was.

Time passed, I couldn't begin to guess how much, when something finally caught my attention.

_"Hush little baby, don't say a word…"_

I tensed, the complacent fog that had settled over my mind suddenly banished.

_"Mama's gonna buy you a mocking bird…"_

Singing. The murmured strains of the lullaby were clearly audible, carried on a beautifully familiar voice. A voice that had once sang that very song to me.

"Rose?" I called hesitantly.

My voice, quiet and rough, was swallowed by the mist. It'd changed, I realized suddenly. The hazy gray current that had been moving as slowly as honey was picking up, like the wind before a storm. Within seconds it was whipping wildly around me, a single line of crimson shot through the suddenly swirling depths. I looked around wildly for something to hold on to, to stop myself, as I flew through the churning gale but there was nothing, I was helpless to the whims of the tempest. I screamed, or tried to though no sound emerged, as I was suddenly ejected into a brilliant light, a flash of pain behind my eyes blinding in its intensity.

And then, everything stopped.

I took several ragged breaths, swallowing hard against sudden nausea, before daring to open my eyes. As I blinked, my vision slowly cleared, but my confusion only grew.

I was in a room that I didn't recognize; the walls were pale pink and a garish yellow border, boasting pastel green and blue rocking horses, lined the room. There was a crib in one corner, a rocking chair in another. It was furnished with the typical nursery accoutrements.

In the middle of the room stood Rose.

"Rose!" I cried in relief. "Rose! What is going on around here? _Where_ are we?"

No response came. In fact, it was as though I hadn't even spoken.

"Rose?" I tried again, anxiety settling in the pit of my stomach like a rock.

She turned slowly, though the direction of her gaze led me to believe that it wasn't in response to my voice. She was smiling gently, peering down at her midsection, where her hands rested. Shock settled over me, rendering me slightly numb as I realized that she had a bump. A _bump_. She was cooing. At a large bump. Where the perfectly flat expanse of her stomach normally was. My mind reeled with the scenario presented to me. There was something seriously wrong here. Rose couldn't be pregnant! That wasn't possible, vampires couldn't…

I wasn't given further time to process the strange development. A frigid gust of wind blew the door open, causing it to snap back against its hinges and bang loudly against the wall behind it. The cheery demeanor of the room shifted abruptly and a sense of dread shuddered up my spine, a cold finger that I felt along each and every vertebrae. A long, ominous shadow was cast along the floor, and despite the hairs prickling at the nape of my neck, I couldn't stop myself from turning to see who it might be.

"Emmett!" I gasped, shocked.

It _was_ Emmett, but not _my_ Emmett.

The monster that stood in the doorway was more demon than man, leering sickeningly at Rose, while licking the remnants of what could only be blood from his lips. It dripped morbidly from the corners of his mouth, slithering down his strong jaw to drop onto his ruined white Polo, the fabric stained so dark with blood that it was almost black. His eyes, sinister pools of crimson, ran the length of Rosalie's frozen form as though she were the most delicious thing he'd ever seen. The terrified expression on her face seemed to exactly match the cold dread that now held me in its vice-like grip.

Now here, a small, logical voice in the back of my mind that sounded suspiciously like my dad questioned if I'd ever seen Rosalie look scared of Emmett. Couldn't it be just possible that I was dreaming? But everything seemed so real. A notion made even more so as a low growl from Emmett jerked me back to the present. He'd dropped into a crouch, grinning savagely. Rosalie's lips were moving, though I was suddenly deaf to my surroundings, and she clutched at her abdomen protectively.

"Emmett, no!" I cried. My throat strained with the force of my shout, and I could feel the slight vibration that signified speech, but I couldn't hear the words.

Emmett sprang, taking Rose to the floor as though she were nothing more than a doll.

Panic raked through me, flaying my already deteriorating nerves. I had to do something! But what? I decided I'd figure it out as I went, and made to move forward.

My feet didn't move.

Uttering a frustrated grunt, I strained against my invisible bonds, but it was like my feet were glued to the floor. Every muscle in my body tensed, trying desperately to obey the silent commands I was issuing, but to no avail. I was completely helpless as with morbid fascination I watched Emmett begin to viciously and methodically tear Rosalie to shreds.

Carlisle wandered into the room, tsking and muttering beneath his breath about doors being left open. As he turned to take in the scene before him, a small expression of shock crossed his face.

"Dad!" I silently shouted. "You have to stop him! Please!"

Of course, my words were futile, ignored or unheard, and I watched with a growing sense of helpless terror as Carlisle stepped closer to observe the slaughter with scholarly eagerness. He was muttering to himself beneath his breath, and I realized with a start that his was the only voice I could hear.

"Sloppy, Emmett," he murmured, shaking his head. "Missed the jugular by several millimeters!" He sighed loudly.

There was just…no way this was real, right?

A loud scraping noise from my left drew my attention and I stared at the small window, its white pane now spattered red, as it was pushed open. Jasper and Edward climbed through, laughing and speaking to one another animatedly. They seemed completely oblivious to Emmett and Rosalie's struggle as they began to walk a slow circle around the perimeter of the room. I couldn't hear them either.

Alice was the last to arrive; she appeared out of thin air dressed in something that looked more like it belonged in Hansel and Gretel, rather than at the scene of a grisly murder. She was smiling, her usual cheerful self, and it shook me as she looked right at me with her coal black eyes. She blinked several times, before turning away. She began skipping around the bloody mess on the floor, producing a small basket, from which she threw colorful flower petals, sing-songing "Ring around the Rosalie…"

It was too much. I needed to leave, or wake up. Something! Anything!

I tried to close my eyes, but like the rest of my body, my eyelids seemed locked in place and I peered at the ceiling with almost desperate attention.

"Wake up Bella, wake up Bella," I muttered quietly beneath my breath.

A horrible snapping noise, followed by a thud silenced me.

"Bella?" Rosalie's voice suddenly broke through the silence. She sounded pissed.

I looked around, desperately hoping for some sort of deliverance.

"Rose?" I asked softly.

"Bella! Down here!"

I didn't want to, I really didn't want to, but I glanced down. And there was Rosalie's head, sitting prettily at my feet.

"God, Bella, you just stood there and let him kill me? You're such a weak, pathetic human. What makes you think you're good enough to be a Cullen? Like we would ever want to make you one of us. Pitiful… Carlisle should've just left you."

I screamed, knowing that the images, ghastly reproductions of perhaps my deepest fears, were pushing the boundaries of my sanity.

The sound was abrupt and long, ringing wildly in my ears, sending the warped reality shattering. Everything vanished completely, and I fell back, panting.

It was then I realized, I was in my bed. Maybe? I wasn't sure how much faith I could place in my mind right now. There was an annoying beeping in my ear, and something cool was touching my hand. I shifted, uncomfortably warm, my clothing unbearable as it trapped the heat of my body against my already feverish skin. As I moved, nausea rolled threateningly, and my stomach clenched. Someone was shouting frantically, and I desperately wanted to tell them to be quiet, but my voice was still playing hooky. There was a blunt pain in my ribs and on my arm as something hard grabbed hold of me roughly, and then I was on my side, heaving.

Tiny flashing dots sparkled behind my eyelids.

And reality reorganized itself once more.

I was in class, sitting in an uncomfortable wooden desk. It was an old contraption, one I hadn't seen since elementary school. You know, the kind that has a prop open top, with a small hollow for your books and pencils and the like. The ones that inevitably snap your fingers whenever you try and close them.

There was the typical whispering, giggling and note-passing before class. I glanced at the clock, bored. We were probably just going to cover something that I'd already learned at home with Carlisle. At least that meant that I could show off a little and raise my hand for every question.

"Alright class, turn to page forty two in your Social Studies books, please," an authoritative voice ordered, and there was the immediate scrambling and creaking as the students dug in their desks for the correct books. I followed their lead, flipping the top of my desk open and peering inside.

And just as quickly slammed it shut, blood rushing to my face. What the…? Did I just see…? No, it couldn't be. But maybe?

I glanced around as covertly as I could, before propping my desk open just slightly. A thin shaft of light slanted through the small crack, illuminating a pile of photos. Photos of men. Naked. Judging by the glitter of some of the Polaroids, they were vampire men.

A blurred pale streak came down on the top of my desk, slamming the lid closed. I pulled my fingers back just in time to avoid getting them squashed.

I flushed guiltily, though I certainly hadn't done anything wrong, I mean those weren't _my_ pictures. Were they?

I let my eyes wander from the long fingered hand resting on my desk, up a lean arm, to the disapproving face of its owner.

"Edward?" I gasped, my eyes probably as big as saucers.

My mind raced. Edward was my professor? I knew he had degrees, but when did he start teaching? And when did he get glasses? Wait, vampires didn't need glasses.

My confusion was overwhelming.

"Well, Ms. Cullen, it looks as though you've forgotten your books again…"

"I didn't…" I began nervously, stumbling over the words.

"Don't interrupt me, Ms. Cullen. You know the punishment."

I did?

"Off with your clothes."

Wait, _what_? I stared at him uncomprehendingly. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You're dying. Remove your clothing."

And then I felt cold hands ripping the fabric from my body, but the plain white walls of the classroom had morphed into the cheerful yellow paint of my bedroom.

I welcomed the cool touch eagerly. I felt as though I were burning alive. Why was it so warm in here? Couldn't someone turn the heat down a little, before my blood started boiling?

Flames seemed to lick at my consciousness and I panicked. I was going to be consumed.

Darkness encroached, blocking all vision, real or imagined, and I welcomed it.

When I next opened my eyes, I was swimming.

In the most frigid waters I'd ever encountered.

I struggled wildly against the white capped waves that threatened to take me under, frantically looking around for the shore. It was miles away, at least, and for a moment I debated just letting the ocean have me. My arms and legs felt as though they were at least a hundred pounds each, and obeyed my orders only sluggishly. But I knew that I had to at least try. The Cullens had protected me for a long time, and I couldn't help but think that it would be a slap in their face if I were to just give up so easily.

So I summoned every swimming stroke that Emmett had taught me, and struck out for land.

I swam and swam, for what felt like hours, until my aching arms and legs trembled with exhaustion. They were going to quit on me soon, I knew. I drew up, treading water, looking to see how much progress I'd made.

The answer was startling.

None. I wasn't a single inch closer to the rocky shore of the beach.

That…that just couldn't be right. Had I somehow gotten turned around? No…I'd been swimming a straight line, I was sure of it. Frustrated tears threatened, and I grit my teeth against them, uttering a tiny exhalation of distress.

A voice responded instantly, "Shhh, Bella, it's okay."

The fading remnants of southern drawl gave me pause.

"Jasper?"

And as though I'd summoned him with the use of his name, he was suddenly there, his limbs cutting through the water behind me with graceful precision.

I peered over my shoulder, taking in his impossible beauty with immediate and profound relief. If anyone could get us out of here, it was level-headed Jasper.

"Jasper, how do we get to the shore?"

"We don't," he answered calmly.

"We don't?" I parroted. Why not?

"No. We're just going to stay out here for a while." His arms suddenly slid around my waist, dragging me back through the bitterly cold water, until the warm skin of my back was pressed to his icy chest. His cool breath tickled my ear as he leaned close, "Is that alright with you?"

My brain briefly short circuited; all I could feel, all I could think about, was the lean strength of his forearm where it rested over the bare skin of my hips and the defined muscles of his abdomen pressing against the small of my back. I gulped. This was way out of my experience range.

"I…I guess so. But, um…why?" I flushed as the words came out breathless, before swallowing hard, trying to get control of myself.

"I want to be alone with you," he responded earnestly, suddenly placing a light kiss on my bare shoulder.

The electricity of his cool, marble lips, pressing into the heat of my skin shocked me right down to my toes. There was an almost painful flutter in my stomach, as though a thousand little butterflies had all taken flight at the same precise moment, and their gilt wings were tickling my insides. I trembled lightly, frozen by this unprecedented turn of events.

"Jasper, I…" I began, but he silenced me by dusting several slow kisses up the side of my neck, obliterating my ability to speak coherently.

"Shh, Bella, just let me…"

_Let him what?_ my fevered mind cried.

His hands were moving now, and I glanced beneath the surface of the murky water to watch his long, pale fingers sliding over my equally fair flesh. He kneaded my hips as he took my earlobe into his mouth. I whispered his name, every nerve ending tingling with awareness of his presence. I just wanted…

He suckled at the small bit of flesh he had between his lips and a noise I'd never made, some breathless cross between a cry and a groan escaped me. I blushed furiously, but Jasper didn't seem to mind. If his actions were any indication, he actually quite liked it. He pulled me back firmly, until my bottom nestled in the cradle of his hips. _Oh!_ He definitely liked it…

I shifted restlessly, moving to face him… and he was gone.

No, wait he was still there, he just wasn't touching me anymore. Why? My hazy mind demanded answers that I sought to provide.

Drifting lazily out of the swirling darkness, which I hadn't even realized had taken me again, I understood three things simultaneously. The first was that I was not swimming. Though I did appear to be in water, very cold water. The second was that I was half naked, and a fully clothed, marble hard chest was pressing into my back. Huh. The final thing was that my head was aching so badly, I felt as though I might throw up if I had to so much as open my eyes.

Carlisle's voice reached me, though it was muffled, as though I had cotton in my ears.

"Ninety nine point eight. We're good to get her out of there."

Strong arms lifted me out of the water far more quickly and forcefully than my pounding head deemed appropriate, and I clenched my teeth against the bile that burned the back of my throat.

_If this is Edward carrying me, it'd be better for all involved if you didn't move me around so much, or your nice clean shirt is going to be christened in the worst imaginable way._

A low chuckle rumbled, but the arms holding me drew me away slightly, so that I wasn't rocking with every step he took.

_Thanks._

"Mmhmm," he murmured in response.

Things got a little obscure from there.

I recalled the slight citrus scent of my sheets, and cool, impersonal hands stripping me of my drenched under garments before tugging a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt onto me.

Then there was darkness and silence. Feminine fingers stroking my damp hair away from my face.

There was no strange imagery, no odd behaviors. Just peace.

I couldn't be certain how much time had passed when the sound of shattering glass jerked me from my restful state. I bolted upright with a frightened cry, turning to see a rather agitated looking Rosalie sitting on the edge of my bed.

"What's going on?" I gasped softly, trembling.

My mind was a jumbled mess of images, and trying to capture what was real and what wasn't was like trying hold water in your hands.

"Am I dreaming? Hallucinating?" I demanded softly.

Alice's tinkling giggle drew my narrowed gaze. She was perched in my window seat shaking her head, "No, Bella, you're awake. Finally."

"What happened?" I asked quietly, falling back against my pillows.

"What do you last remember?" Rosalie murmured soothingly.

Well, the last thing I remembered was possibly making out with Jasper, _my brother_, I threw in unnecessarily, blanching, in the ocean, but that was definitely not real, so moving on.

"Umm…I was walking, out in the sun. I stopped to take a little break."

I glanced at the clock on my bedside table, blinking slowly and repeatedly as there was no way I was reading that right.

"Ten fifteen? At night?" My voice held horrified awe.

"Yep. You were out in that heat for almost twelve hours, Bella. What were you thinking?" It was as close to chastising as Rosalie got with me. This indulgent, exasperated tone of voice. It was rather nice, considering the last time I'd gotten yelled at for something, it'd been by Emmett. And he wasn't exactly a quiet guy.

I sighed. "I dunno. I just wanted to take a quick walk out in the sun. I didn't know it was going to be a billion degrees out today."

Rosalie's enchanting, melodic laughter joined Alice's, and I smiled.

"Well, I hope you know that you've got Emmett in complete guard dog mode now, Bella," Alice advised. I thought she sounded way too amused by the prospect.

"Oh no," I groaned.

"Oh yeah," Rose agreed. "After your little bout of heat stroke, he's all up in arms about you even leaving the house by yourself. Here, drink this."

I pushed myself up on the headboard, taking the bottle of blue Gatorade with mild surprise.

"You know this is artificially colored, right?" I teased, already removing the cap.

Rose laughed and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, Carlisle insists."

I took a drink of the fruity smelling liquid, sighing pleasantly as the dull pounding in my head began to ease almost immediately. I gulped down half the bottle eagerly, wiping my lips lightly with the back of my hand.

Alice and Rosalie were watching me intensely, and I suddenly got the distinct feeling that they were playing my illness down.

"So, heat stroke huh? Sounds like a silly, frivolous, girly kind of thing."

Alice was smirking, already onto my ploy, but Rosalie's frown was deep and serious. "Bella, don't say such things. You were very, _very_ sick. Do you know how worried you had everyone? You could've…" She cut herself off abruptly, looking away, which was fine with me, because I really didn't need her to continue. Died? I could've died from a couple hours in the sun? Geez, they needed to hurry up and change me, before breathing became some sort of hazard.

"So, how come you're not yelling at me?" I figured I knew the answer to this one, but I wanted to hear it anyway. I fiddled with the cap to my drink.

"Bella, we're just glad you're alright," Alice's sweet voice trilled.

"Yeah, plus, you're going to get the lecture of a lifetime later from both Carlisle and Emmett." Rose's voice was grim.

I raked a hand through my hair, glancing around with a sigh. Yeah, that's about what I…

Whoa.

I stared across the room in shock. Okay, maybe this _was_ part of a hallucination after all.

The far wall, built to be just a massive book case, was smashed to slivers, my books piled in heaps on the floor in the leftover debris. I could see some lose pages sticking up damningly from small hills of rubble. And my beautiful antique silver standing mirror was shattered, it's frame bent into something that belonged in a post-modernist art display.

After seventeen years, you'd really think I'd be used to this, but my cheeks began to flame with my anger.

"What…happened to my room?" I demanded testily.

Alice laughed softly, crossing her legs and steepling her fingers as she gazed unabashedly at Rose. The latter was looking rather uncomfortable.

"Oh yeah. Well, Emmett was being an ass, as is his specialty, and I decided to teach him a thing or two about manners."

I was incredulous. "By destroying my room?" There was an Emmett shaped hole in my wall, and I peered into the bathroom next door with a frown.

"Well, hey, easy access now, right?" Rose chimed in cheerfully.

I turned a glare on her.

"Was that the glass I heard breaking?" But no, that couldn't be right, I'd just heard that, and Rose was sitting right on my bed.

Rose frowned thoughtfully at my question, finally shaking her head. "No, that was your other two idiot brothers, fighting. I believe Edward took Jasper out a window."

I gasped in fright, already rolling off the edge of my bed, all thought of the destruction of my room gone in a heartbeat as my need to ensure their well-being overwhelmed me. Though I knew they were far more resilient than I was giving them credit for, I couldn't help but imagine them laying in bloody shards on the ground outside the window. I looked around desperately for my slippers, trying to ignore the trembling weakness of my legs. Forget it; I would just have to go without them, not like…

"Wait, Bella?"

Rosalie's hesitancy caught me off guard, considering what a fairly straight forward person (vampire, whatever) she was, and I turned toward her expectantly.

Alice quickly interjected, cutting off whatever Rose was going to say. "Don't you think I would have seen that, Rosalie?"

Rose seemed to grit her teeth for a moment, before declaring crossly, "I want to hear it from Bella."

Hear what from me? I looked between the two of them with quite a bit of bewilderment.

"Bella, has Jasper ever…I mean…Have you two…Well…" Rosalie's staggering question shook me, and I sank back onto the edge of the bed. "Has Jasper ever done anything untoward to you?" She took a quick, unneeded breath, adding, "Sexually?"

I couldn't have been more shocked if she'd slapped me.

"What?" I breathed.

"Told you so," Alice said with an air of utter superiority.

"She hasn't denied it, Alice," Rosalie argued.

"No!" I exclaimed, before Rose could even finish talking. "Never! What…? Why would you even…? No!"

I shook my head so fiercely that my neck ached.

"Hey, Bella, calm down, I believe you."

Rose's hurried exclamation, as well as her comforting hand resting lightly on my shoulder, did wonders to calm the sudden horrible tension that had claimed me, and I relaxed slightly.

"No, we've never, he's never…Nothing like that." I was pretty sure my face was nearing crimson, something I could've verified if my full length mirror wasn't shattered beyond recognition on my floor. "Why are we even discussing this?"

Alice and Rose exchanged a look just laden with implications and I frowned, having the sudden urge to stomp my foot.

"What?" I demanded.

"When you were, kinda, out of it," Alice began, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "Edward saw some things in your mind, I guess about Jasper, and he just assumed that…they were memories."

_What? _He did _what?_ Of all the ignorant, idiotic, moronic…I bolted out of the room, wincing as a sliver of broken glass pierced my foot, but didn't slow me down.

"Bella, wait!" Rose demanded. "Carlisle and Emmett are already taking care of it!"

I ignored her, racing down the hall.

Edward and his stupid mind reading. Did he not realize that I was really, really out of it? A few images swam up from the nebulous depths of my memories of the last few hours. Rose pregnant? Jesus, did he think that was real too?

I took the stairs two at a time. Yeah, I know, not a particularly genius move for someone as uncoordinated as myself. And true to form, I hit the fourth stair from the bottom with a resounding crash, my tailbone taking the brunt of the force.

I forced myself to my feet, making a beeline for the front door. I threw it wide, and stumbled out into the night.

A low rumble of thunder resonated ominously, and the wind whipped my hair wildly around me. I shivered, wrapping my arms tightly around myself, even as I limped toward the rather obvious sounds of Edward and Jasper engaged in a fight. There was a loud crash, followed by a low urgent voice I could barely identify as Carlisle.

Nothing could've prepared me for what awaited me as I rounded the corner of the house.

Shattered glass and splintered wood littered the ground, while a thin beam of light, shining down from Jasper's room, illuminated the scene.

Jasper and Edward were circling each other slowly, teeth bared. They looked like…I shuddered violently. They looked like my dream Emmett, though their eyes were black, rather than red.

Emmett and Carlisle flanked each of my brothers, trying to calm them, obviously not wanting to become physically involved until absolutely necessary.

"Poor tortured Edward, can't stand the thought of anyone touching little Bella. What's the matter, jealous?" Jasper taunted uncharacteristically.

Edward snarled, a terrifying, bestial sound, lunging for Jasper.

"No!" I cried, stumbling forward. I don't know what I was thinking, I mean, what could I possibly do against the preternatural senses of my family, but I couldn't let them tear each other to pieces over this crazy misunderstanding.

"Bella!" Emmett's voice was terror in its purest form, and in a blur of speed, he was upon me, scooping me up in his impossibly strong arms. "What are you doing out here? This isn't safe for you." He stroked my tangled hair, tawny eyes moving swiftly, concernedly over my face.

"I had to tell Edward, Jasper and I, we never…" I couldn't even say it, it was just too embarrassing.

Emmett stiffened, his face growing dark and I frowned. Great. Now he was going to get after me about my nonexistent relationship?

But that wasn't it at all. I felt his chest stop, mid-breath, and he suddenly grit his teeth, his pupils dilating as he murmured softly, worriedly, "Bella, are you bleeding?"

Yeah right! I glanced up, shaking my head wildly. No way, I was not _that_ stupid. Coming down to two angry vampires bleeding, only a moron…

And then I felt the warm, sticky wetness dripping down my foot, soaking into the leg of my pajama bottoms.

_A sharp pain in my foot as I fled my room…_

"Oh my god, Emmett, yes. My foot!"

"Carlisle!" he called urgently.

But it was too late, as the first drops of rain were unleashed, a cool breeze stirred through the trees, and my enraged brothers turned upon us.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I'll get one question outta the way real quick. I didn't italicize Bella's hallucination type dreams, because to her it felt real. It's like it was actually happening. Because the events were so bizzare, we can all assume that they were just in her mind, but to her, they felt as real as anything. So I apologize if that was confusing, but it's how I wanted to do it. :)**

**Love it? Hate it? Leave me a review! Well actually, if you hate it, just don't read it. :P**


	4. Another Way to Die

**A/N: Okay, I struggled with some crazy writer's block on this chapter. Hope you enjoy it. :) **

**For clarification, in case you hadn't picked it up, Edward _can_ read Bella's mind in this story. **

**Let me know what you think.**

**Edited: 12/27/2011**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 4

Another Way to Die

**Bella POV**

_But it was too late, as the first drops of rain were unleashed, a cool breeze stirred through the trees and my enraged brothers turned upon us._

Everything happened very swiftly from there, and yet, time seemed to slow down to such a degree that every second was agonizingly long.

Within a moment of Emmett's urgent plea, Carlisle had leapt in front of us. It was nothing short of astonishing to see the gentle man whom I considered to be my father in a tense crouch, teeth bared, an utterly savage expression on his normally refined features. Astonishing and terrifying. To witness that feral countenance on Jasper and Edward, or even Emmett was one thing, but for Carlisle to assume it, calm, even-tempered Carlisle… The depths to which I had underestimated the demons that resided within my family were unfathomable.

My fingers were trembling as they came to rest at the base of my throat where my heart thudded wildly, beating so fiercely that I was deaf to everything but the dull rush of blood as it pounded in my skull. I was shaking; shivering violently, like a leaf caught in a bitter, merciless wind. Emmett's arms closed more tightly around me, but I found myself unable to take comfort in the action. If Edward and Jasper could turn on me so easily, who knew what it would take to push Emmett over the edge?

A low growl rent the misty air, and within the time it took for me to blink, Jasper had lunged for Carlisle. I could only stare, wide-eyed, as they crashed into the underbrush, grappling wildly for dominance. I closed my eyes briefly, dragging a shallow breath into my suddenly rebellious lungs, willing myself to wake up.

But I knew, I knew that this was no dream, nightmarish as the scene playing out before me was.

"Emmett," I pleaded, quietly. I don't know what I was asking for, though reassurance that I wasn't going to die tonight suddenly seemed quite important.

He didn't so much as look at me, and it took only a moment for me to understand why.

Edward was laughing, a quiet, eerie sound, and he circled us slowly, a vulture certain of his prey.

To say I'd never seen an expression such as that I was currently faced with would be an understatement of the highest degree. Yes, I'd seen hatred, and hunger. And I'd seen fury and savagery. But to see them all combined into one inhuman mask, and on the face of a man who I'd come to love as dearly as a brother…

_Edward_, I thought sadly.

If he heard me, he didn't acknowledge it. He danced gracefully around us, Emmett pivoting with him, never allowing him to get behind us. My traitorous mind allowed for a brief montage of what might occur if he were to escape Emmett's watchful eye for even a moment, and my stomach churned.

Edward laughed again, the sound prickling the hairs at the nape of my neck with its unpleasantness.

"All that and more, sweet little Isabella," he murmured in response to my grotesque thoughts.

Emmett snarled softly, taking a sudden, swift step forward, his hands tightening convulsively on me. "Shut it, Edward." The words were low; laden with threat.

"Or what, Emmett?"

Edward had the advantage, and there wasn't a single person present, living or otherwise, that didn't know it.

Emmett's hands tightened to the point of pain, and I winced, but uttered no protest. It was my fault we were in this situation; there was no way I was going to further add to my list of crimes by distracting him.

"You're damaging the merchandise," Edward murmured bemusedly.

"Hmm?" Emmett glanced down at me, much to my dismay, and the game of cat and mouse came to a severe and abrupt close.

Edward hand wrapped around Emmett's throat, a quick pale blur of motion, and we were suddenly thrust violently against the trunk of the nearest tree. Despite Emmett's rigid grip, I slammed into the marble strength of his chest, and the breath left my lungs in a single, fell whoosh. I gasped desperately, grasping at the edges of consciousness as they folded in on me.

I could feel Emmett struggling, but for all his strength he was at a severe disadvantage with me still in his arms. He turned his head swiftly, teeth bared, intending to bite Edward I was certain. Edward tsk'ed, as though he'd caught Emmett with his hand in the cookie jar before dinner, and pulled us toward him with a quick jerk of his arm, before slamming us cruelly against the tree once more. The force of the blow was enough to send several large branches crashing to the ground and I felt my teeth snap together as I was nearly jolted out of Emmett's hands.

Edward leaned in, his face close to Emmett's as he murmured almost seductively, "Emmett, why do you resist? You know that you want it as much as I do." A brief pause, before he continued charitably. "I'd share, you know.

"Jesus Christ, Edward," Emmett gasped. "You've completely fucking lost it. This is Bella you're talking about!"

Edward laughed derisively, trailing his cold fingertips down my calf, where it hung over Emmett's arm.

"Isabella _Cullen_. Right. Parading around as if she were one of us. The reality is that she's just a human. Nothing more."

The words stung, despite the severity of our situation and I blinked against unbidden tears.

Edward's hand trailed over my ankle and I suddenly realized what he was doing. I jerked out of my hazy half-conscious state, returning to reality violently, struggling against Emmett's iron hold, kicking at Edward. The blood… My foot…

"No!" I'd meant to yell it, but it came out as nothing more than a defeated whimper.

Edward's hand wrapped around my ankle, fingers meeting easily around the fragile column. Then he squeezed. Hard.

I cried out, feeling the flesh give and the bones begin to bend within his grasp. I struggled feebly, half blinded by the pain he provoked.

Emmett snarled furiously, but could do little to help me without letting me go, a prospect that was too terrifying to comprehend. There was a flash of short-lived relief as the pain ebbed and Edward's fingertips trailed over the bottom of my dirty foot. I moaned piteously.

_No, no, don't! Please!_

Again, that callous laughter, and suddenly his fingers were pressing against the small wound on my foot. He pushed cruelly, forcing a small shard of glass out of the already healing cut, and I stiffened.

_Stop! Please, not Emmett, please…_

He dug his fingers into the injury, and I screamed. Warm blood flowed freely down my ankle, sliding sinuously over Edward's hand.

Emmett froze.

"You see, Emmett, there's more than enough for both of us." He held his hand up, licking the tip of one finger, uttering a dramatic, blissful sigh. As the blood passed his lips, I could see the last vestiges of humanity leave his gaze.

I watched in horror as he suddenly reached up, running his thumb over Emmett's lower lip, leaving a dark smear of crimson behind. Emmett tried desperately to turn his head away, tried to break free of Edward's other hand, but it was no use.

I hazarded a glance at Emmett's eyes, unsure if I really wanted to look, terrified that I'd see the same feral expression reflected on his handsome face. I knew, instinctively, that something, some very significant thing that existed between us would be broken beyond repair if he were to look at me like he wanted nothing more than to tear my throat out.

His expression was tight, as though he were in pain, and he stared at me intensely. I watched with horrible fascination as the glittering topaz of his eyes began to darken. His pupils dilated, swelling like balloons filled too full, just before tiny veins of black burst from their center. The spindly ebony arms extended, mapping circuitously over Emmett's irises until all that remained was inky onyx.

I struggled with my wild, incapacitating fear. This was Emmett, I reminded myself. Emmett, who often looked as though he wanted to cause pain to inanimate objects for even imagining to exist and possibly threaten me. How many bicycles had ended up a twisted, metal wreck in our garage? And don't even get me started on cracks in the sidewalk. He could control himself, right? I was more important than a little bit of blood, right?

"Emmett?" I breathed cautiously, barely even noticing the cold, wet drops that fell from the sky with increasing speed.

His nostrils flared, and I felt his chest swell as he took a deep, shuddering breath. He looked up at Edward, a slow smile curling his lips, and I felt faint with the swiftness with which I paled. Please let it be quick, I uttered in silent, fervent prayer.

"Edward?" Emmett murmured pleasantly.

"Mmm?" Edward purred in response.

"I've been thinking about your proposition."

"I see. And?"

"And… I think you'd better back the fuck off, because you're already going to be emo as shit about this little scenario, and I really don't think I could handle the hundred or so years of moping you'd do if you actually hurt Bella… Assuming I let you live that long."

Edward looked confused for perhaps a fraction of a second before his fury overtook him.

The world shifted sharply as Emmett swung me over his shoulder, stabilizing me there with one hand, freeing the other. There were the sounds of struggling and then a dull thud, followed swiftly by a loud crash, some distance away.

"ROSALIE!" Emmett bellowed. My ears rang with the volume he projected.

For several seconds, there was nothing but the quiet whisper of rain slinking over greenery before dropping to the ground, nothing to indicate Rosalie's approach, but suddenly, I saw her high-heeled feet next to Emmett's.

She sighed, and I could hear the smile in her voice. "I told her not to come out here, hon, but you know how Bella is. Are our two idiot brothers done beating the crap out of each oth…" I could only assume she finally saw the expression on Emmett's face. Or perhaps it was the smell of my blood. Either way, she stopped short.

"What's going on?" she demanded quietly

"Jasper and Edward caught scent of Bella's blood mid-fight, they're pretty gone. I need you to find Edward and subdue him, get Esme to make sure Jasper and Carlisle are alright."

"Alice?" Rosalie queried.

"I figured she'd be caught up in her visions or some shit. You know she's no use when she's like that."

"Hey!" A melodic soprano interjected from a few feet away. "Useless indeed," Alice sniffed daintily.

"We've got to find Edward, Alice. Can you 'see' him?" Rosalie questioned swiftly.

"There's no clear path, not when his mind is like this, more demon than human, but we should be able to follow his scent. I've already sent Esme to find Jasper and Carlisle, but rest assured they're both fine."

"Where'd he go?"

"I threw him that way." Emmett's neck moved slightly against side.

If I was expecting to hear their departure, I'd be waiting a long time. Silence settled over us.

"Emmett," I murmured tentatively, my heart finally slowing as the threat of immediate danger faded.

"What?" He sounded irritated, and I frowned. I had a feeling that a lecture on bleeding around angry vamps was going to be a lot less pleasant than one about wearing a hat in the sun.

"Can you please set me down? I feel like I'm going to pass out." It wasn't a lie. Hanging over his shoulder like some prehistoric conquest was definitely making me light-headed.

The trees shifted, and suddenly the damp ground was underfoot. I pushed my wet hair out of my face, not daring to look at him just yet.

"Sorry," I whispered lamely. I couldn't quite wrap my mind around what had just happened, not that there were words to convey my gratitude or guilt even if I could.

"What were you thinking, Bella?" He murmured morosely.

"I…I guess I wasn't. I just wanted to make sure everyone was alright, and…" I broke off, the sudden lump in my throat making it impossible to continue.

I caught sight of Emmett's hand in my peripheral vision, just as his fingers came to rest lightly under my chin, forcing my face up. I met his golden gaze reluctantly.

"Bella, you have to promise me you will never do anything so careless again." I'd never seen such a serious expression on Emmett's face.

I nodded solemnly. "I promise, Emmett."

He stared at me intensely for several silent seconds, before suddenly smiling faintly, ruffling my hair lightly. "You sure you can walk? How's your ankle?"

I took a tentative step, grimacing as pain throbbed dully through my foot. "I think it's alright."

"Are you sure? When Carlisle gets back we'll have to have him…"

There was a crack of thunder, a soft whoosh of air that fluttered my hair back from my face, and Emmett was suddenly gone. I caught only a blur of motion before the bottom dropped out of my stomach and I was flying. I hit the ground with bruising force, sliding back through the mud, all too aware of someone heavy on top of me.

"Did you really think that he was going to stop me?" The words were a hiss, cold breath fluttering against my ear.

I stared up into the enraged, yet still undeniably beautiful face of Edward. I swallowed convulsively, my heart stopping abruptly, before resuming double time.

"You are mine, Isabella." I could feel the strength of his legs pinning my arms to my sides, and I knew that any struggling I may do would be futile. This was it then, it was useless. His cold hand pushed my face to the side, exposing my throat, the other dragging my hair away. I wondered if he could see the wild fluttering of my pulse just beneath my skin.

He groaned, and I quickly stopped that train of thought. He probably didn't need any extra encouragement, unwitting though it may be.

He leaned in, inhaling deeply. His teeth dragged slowly over my skin, and I tensed in expectation of the pain.

I had always wondered if it were true that your life flashed before your eyes just before you died, and what do you know, today was apparently the day to answer that question. I was almost anticipating reliving my favorite memories. Sadly, all that my brain seemed capable of producing was Edward related recollections.

There were Edward and I, sitting on the bench of the gorgeous grand piano in our living room, his fingers guiding mine over the ivory keys as we created an enchanting harmony, the likes of which I hadn't even realized existed.

And there we were in the dusty, silent corridor on one of our many museum visits. He avidly pointed out different brush strokes as we walked from painting to painting.

Low music seemed to fill my head as I recalled when we'd attended the symphony together. He'd held onto the back of the beautiful dress Alice had stuffed me into, lest I fall over the edge of the balcony in my eagerness to be closer to the musicians.

I clenched my fists, tears suddenly welling in my eyes. I fought them valiantly, but in the end, they trickled free, mingling with the rain on my cheeks.

_Edward, please, I don't want to die._

He snarled low, and his lips moved against my neck, as though he was speaking, but I couldn't decipher what was being said.

_Please, don't do this. You're not a monster, you're better than this. Please._

He tensed, his fingers clenching in my hair. I opened my eyes, staring into the tortured face above me.

_Edward, I love you._

I could almost see the internal struggle being waged as he stared into my eyes, watching the memories of our past seventeen years together flash through my mind.

Finally, he blinked down at me slowly, his hands suddenly relaxing, pulling away from my person.

"Bella?" he rasped, his gaze confused.

What? No way. I could barely allow myself the sudden hope that swelled, but there was no denying the retreat of the crazed look in his eyes.

"Edward?" I whispered tentatively.

"Bella?" he repeated, more slowly this time.

"Oh my God, Edward," I suddenly sobbed.

He scrambled backward, releasing me completely. Crouching several feet away, he stared at me as though he'd never seen me before.

"What's going on?" His voice was trembling slightly.

I couldn't have answered him even if I'd had the words. Turning on my side, I wrapped my arms lightly over my head, letting the inevitable tears come.

"Bella, what?" His hand touched my shoulder lightly, and I jerked.

"Please, don't touch me," I whispered.

"What…What happened… Oh my God."

I tried to stop it, the entire scene, from playing repeatedly through my mind. I tried to save him from the guilt I was certain he was sure to feel, but I just couldn't. His cruel hands and cold laughter echoed over and over until I thought I might go mad with it.

"Bella, I…"

"Edward," a cold voice that I recognized as Carlisle's interrupted. "Perhaps you should join Jasper in some hunting."

"I didn't mean…"

"I know, son. Go." Carlisle's voice held a quiet authority that was not to be denied.

Strong arms curled around me, and I let them. There was no fight left in me. If Edward wanted to drain me completely dry right now, I probably wouldn't deny him.

A low, pained cry echoed in the wake of that thought, and I knew I should feel badly, but I simply was unable to summon the appropriate empathy. I was emotionally and physically exhausted, retreating to a quiet place in the back of my mind, a warm, safe place free of pain.

The gentle rocking of the body holding me lulled me into a semi-conscious state, where I rested on the narrow precipice between waking and slumber.

"Bella?" A worried voice whispered through the comforting silence of my darkness and I frowned. Couldn't they see that I needed to rest now, I thought irritably, slipping further away. Something prodded at my sore ankle, and I retreated further, withdrawing until there was nothing but the peaceful lull of my own quiet mind.

* * *

"_Belllllla," a low voice sing-songed quietly._

_I glanced up from the book in my hands, a small frown on my lips. "Hello?" I called softly._

"_Belllllla," the voice repeated pleasantly._

_I slipped the worn tome of poetry closed, pushing away from the trunk of the tree that'd been providing me shade, and standing shakily. Sunlight filtered thinly through the green canopy above, and I squinted into the looming forest shadows. "Who's there?" I demanded._

_Laughter met my question, and I felt my heart skip a beat._

"_Whoever's out there, this isn't funny," I declared more bravely than I was feeling._

"_Isn't it?" A low voice murmured just near my ear, and I spun wildly, coming face to face with nothing more than the sprawling willow that'd been steadfastly sitting behind me all day._

_What? I clutched the book tightly to my chest, as though it could somehow provide me protection from the prankster, and took a small, stumbling step back. I bumped into something unyielding and spun once more, feeling dizzy with the swiftness of my direction changes. The willow tree…wait…how? I pivoted back…and screamed._

_Crimson eyes stared blankly out of a monstrous face, only inches from my own. Recognition hit me like a bucket of cold water._

"_Edward…" I gasped quietly._

_But the face was already changing, and now it was Jasper that stared at me as though he'd gladly kill a hundred people just to get at my blood. And then Carlisle, Emmett…the faces continued to morph wildly, until the face of death had taken on the visage of every person I'd ever loved, and expected loved me in return._

_Finally Edward's angelic features returned, and he laughed, a shrill, grating noise._

"_Shall we then, Bella?" he politely questioned._

"_What?" I replied dumbly._

_And then, he was upon me, his teeth tearing into my throat, my life spilling over his lips. I screamed, the pain intense, consuming…that of betrayal spearing the most deeply of all._

* * *

I bolted upright, shaking violently.

My hands flew instinctively to my neck, where I half expected them to encounter the warm stickiness indicative of blood. I found my skin hot, slightly damp with sweat, but clean otherwise. My pulse beat rapidly beneath my hand, like a tiny bird trapped in a small cage.

Falling back onto my pillows, trying to slow my racing heart and mind, I silently comforted myself. _Just a dream. Just a dream._

I jumped slightly as the door to my room flew open with such force that it broke the door stop clean off, and buried the doorknob in the wall behind it.

_Poor Esme_, I lamented silently, before the blur of movement slowed, and the edge of my bed dipped under the sudden weight of whoever had felt my nightmare needed immediate attention. I sat up with a frown, the expression expanding as I realized who it was.

"Edward?" I gasped, drawing away with a grimace.

"Are you okay?" he demanded intensely, running his hands perfunctorily over my arms.

I couldn't find my voice. _What…what are you doing in here?_

"You were screaming."

He answered so matter of factly that for a moment I began to question my sanity. Had earlier really even happened? I shrugged his hands off impatiently, kicking the covers away. Reaching down, I tugged the hem of my pant leg up. A deep violet bruise, exactly the size and shape of Edward's hand, glared damningly up at me.

It had been real…What could he possibly be thinking that he'd presume I wanted him here?

He was frowning, obviously following my every silent thought.

"Where…Where is everyone else?" I murmured, edging further away from him on the bed, hating the fear that suddenly claimed me in his presence. I had known Edward for my entire seventeen years on this Earth and I couldn't recall a single time when he'd ever done so much as pull my hair while brushing it. Had tonight ruined everything we had built? The thought was agonizing.

Judging by his expression, he felt the same.

"Rosalie, Esme, Alice and Jasper are hunting. Carlisle is downstairs, and Emmett…"

"I'm right here," a baritone voice intoned quietly as Emmett appeared in the doorway.

Profound relief washed through me.

"Come here, please," I waved him over, the motion just a little too frantic to be casual.

Edward's frown deepened.

Emmett strode silently into the room; he folded himself into the small window seat, quite a feat considering his size. It escaped no one's notice that he watched Edward warily.

Uncomfortable silence stretched between the three of us. Edward was staring at the mark he'd left on my leg, his expression unreadable.

_Edward, why are you here?_

He glanced at Emmett, replying quietly, "I just needed to make sure you were alright. I'm sorry."

Was he apologizing for coming to my room or for the day's earlier occurrences?

"Both," he clarified. "Bella, you have to understand, I would never…" He swallowed audibly. "I would never intentionally hurt you. You know that, don't you?"

A loud, scoffing exhalation from behind me told us both what Emmett thought on the subject.

I stared quietly at the beautiful, martyred young man before me, peering fervidly into his eyes as though they would somehow allow me access to his mind.

"I wish they could," he fervently whispered.

I nodded softly, never once looking away. Edward was as still as a statue. As still as a vampire, I though with a brief, internal chuckle.

The corners of Edward's lips twitched slightly.

"I believe you," I whispered finally, truly believing the words. His shoulders slumped, and it didn't take Jasper's ability to recognize the consolation my words provided. "But…" I qualified softly, "I do not trust you, Edward. You've broken that so beyond recognition with your actions today that I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust you again. You scare me. No, you terrify me." My soft laughter held no mirth.

"Bella," he whispered brokenly, reaching out as though he meant to touch me.

A large hand shot out from behind me to close around Edward's wrist; I hadn't even heard Emmett approach.

"Don't," he declared quietly.

Edward and Emmett locked gazes, and I could only guess at what their silent exchange entailed.

"It's okay, Emmett," I murmured.

He slowly released Edward, but didn't move, towering protectively over me.

Edward's cool knuckles grazed the warmth of my cheek, and I worked very hard to restrain the shudder that threatened to break lose. He must've plucked the distaste from my mind, because he quickly returned his hand to his lap, where he laced his fingers together tightly.

"I'm sorry, Bella, you don't know how sorry I am. If there's anything I can do, anything at all, don't hesitate…" I'd never heard Edward ramble. It was quite the interesting event. "The blood, if it hadn't been for the blood, and Jasper, and your thoughts…"

"Get out," Emmett growled softly.

"What?" Edward and I spoke in unison, glancing up at him.

"Get out, _now_," Emmett's face was cold with fury.

"Listen, Emmett," Edward's voice had taken an edge of irritation. "I know you think of yourself as Bella's protector, but until she tells me to go, I don't believe…"

Emmett moved so swiftly that I didn't even see him until he had Edward pinned against the door.

"Emmett!" I exclaimed softly.

His face was very close to Edward's and he seemed to have to force his words out from between clenched teeth.

"You will leave now, do you understand me, _Edward_?" He said the name as though it tasted awful in his mouth. "You will not come in here again until you can do so without blaming your own lack of control on Bella. Blood and fighting and thoughts. Oh boo hoo. Keep that shit to yourself, got it? There were plenty of us exposed to at least two of those things and everyone else managed to keep themselves in check. Even Jasper."

Edward was staring quietly at Emmett, and I presumed Emmett was adding some things that he probably didn't want me to hear, in his mind.

Finally, Edward turned a dejected stare on me, but I looked away. I did feel guilty, and yes, I truly believed that I was quite responsible for what occurred today, but I didn't refute Emmett's words. Edward couldn't just pass off his own role in today's craziness on me.

"Fine," he muttered coldly, shrugging out of Emmett's hands and stalking out the door.

Emmett glared angrily after him, his hands clenched into tight fists at his sides.

"Bella, when I think of what could have happened…" It took me several seconds to decipher the quiet words.

Poor Emmett, I thought sadly. "Emmett, it's okay…I'm alright."

"For now," he replied almost wistfully. "How long until you get a paper cut, or scrape your knee…I can't keep you safe forever."

"Maybe you should just change me," I whispered into the silence that followed, the words coming without thought.

He turned shrewd eyes on me, suddenly laughing softly. "You know Carlisle's decision, Bella. Eighteen and you can make the choice. I'm not going to be the one to break that rule."

My heart plummeted as the hope I hadn't realized I'd allowed myself was dashed. Just one more year. I managed to shrug relatively carelessly.

"Fine then, but promise me one thing?"

He took a step closer to the bed, looking amused.

"Depends on what it is."

"Promise me that if I don't make it to my eighteenth birthday…"

"Bella," he interjected warningly.

"Let me finish. Promise me that if I don't make it to my eighteenth birthday, if Edward slips again, or I'm in some near-fatal crash and I'm not going to make it, promise me that you'll change me."

He took several silent steps toward me, suddenly reaching out to ruffle my hair.

"Not a chance, kiddo."

"Why not?" I replied petulantly.

"Put that lip away, you know that only works on Edward." Sitting on the edge of my bed, he suddenly looked quite serious. "I don't think I'd be able to stop, Bella, and I'd never make you a promise that I couldn't keep."

I smiled faintly at his stark honesty. "Thanks, Emmett."

He stood up slowly, and I grabbed at his sleeve. "Emmett?"

He glanced down at me curiously.

I flushed faintly, hating that I was such a little coward, but unable to help myself. "Will you please stay with me tonight? I just…I know that nothing's going to happen, but I'd feel safer with you around."

He didn't laugh as I'd kind of expected. He chuckled, but the noise wasn't the condescending taunting I'd come to expect. He nodded, looking slightly pleased.

"Of course, Bells."

He settled into the rocking chair in the corner of my room, and I smiled at the familiar creak. Rose had pleaded with me on numerous occasions to allow her to fix the squeaking, and every time I'd declined. There was just something about the gentle rhythm of the familiar groaning joints that was comforting.

I settled back into my covers, staring quietly at the wispy canopy of my bed, shifting every few seconds as I tried to get comfortable.

Sighing softly, I suddenly tossed the covers away, slipping my feet over the edge of the bed and onto the floor.

"Bella?" Emmett questioned quietly.

I shuffled over to him, blushing brightly as I stared at the carpet. I wasn't sure he was going to go for this…

I held my arms out to him, wondering if he remembered…

For just a second, I thought he was going to deny me, but finally he chuckled, and reached out to pluck me off the floor. "C'mere brat."

Wrapping his arms tightly around me, he tucked me close against his chest. I smiled nostalgically as the rocking chair creaked under our combined weight. He rocked us slowly, easily, toying with the ends of my hair, and I was immediately taken back to the days of my childhood. The safe comfort of Emmett washed over me, and I slipped into an effortless sleep, my dreams consumed with a golden-eyed angel that kept the monsters at bay.

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**A/N: Awww, I love Emmett. **

**I've got a pretty good outline in my mind for Chapter 5, so hopefully I'll have it up soon.**

**As always, I love to hear what you think!**


	5. Interlude: Love Fool

**A/N: Okay, so this isn't Chapter Five, but a small demi-chapter if you will. It's a bit of information that fits into neither Chapters Four nor Five, but that I felt needed to be presented, so I decided to create this brief interlude. Yes, it's short, it's supposed to be.**

**A little present for my crazy long update time last time. :)**

**Also, I know I don't answer every review, but I do read and love every single one, so I wanted to offer my sincere thanks to everyone that reads my stories and offers me encouragement to continue. You have no idea what a nice little review does for a terrible bout of writer's block or when I'm just having a tough time of things. So thanks again to everyone! :D**

**To those that are questioning this pairing, yes, I still plan for it to be an Edward x Bella x Jasper triangle. It may seem as though that'd never come to pass at this point in the story, but we have a ways to go yet. Just trust me! :D**

**Edited 12/29/2011**

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Calefaction

Interlude 1

Love Fool

**Edward PoV**

I growled softly as the twitching animal in my arms went limp. Glancing down, I noted with mild surprise that it was a moose. It hadn't tasted like a moose. More like, a raccoon, or a squirrel; something miniscule and insubstantial. Running my tongue lightly over my teeth, clearing them of the red film I knew would've accumulated there, I tossed the carcass into the steadily growing pile between Jasper and myself.

Of course, since that tiny drop of Bella's blood, nothing had tasted quite the same, had it, an insidious little voice in the back of my mind whispered.

I crushed it with a low snarl. Enough. It was bad enough that there was a faint crimson ring marring the outer edges of my irises, I was not going to subject myself to the constant torturous reminders that my mind seemed intent to taunt me with.

"You alright?" Jasper looked only faintly concerned as he glanced up from the struggling coyote in his arms. No doubt he'd felt my sudden distress. I nodded briefly, turning away as he tore the throat out of the dying animal.

I hadn't quite forgiven him yet for his trespasses, real or imagined, and not for the first time in the past three days, I wished that I was out here with anyone else.

But Carlisle had insisted, both for Bella's peace of mind, and for the sake of keeping our familial unit intact, that Jasper and I head up to Vancouver for a couple of days. So here I was, with my empathic brother, struggling to keep my feelings contained. Feelings that I'd yet to interpret. Feelings that I did not need Jasper examining. He was doing the same with his thoughts.

Which was really for the best, because if anything _was_ going on between him and Bella, it'd be in his best interest to keep it to himself.

Jealous rage, a companion I'd grown used to these past few days, seethed to life within me, causing the edges of my vision to blur only just. I reached out, wrapping my hand around the neck of a fleeing deer, no doubt running from Jasper, and snapped the fragile column as though it were little more than a twig.

No, I wanted to know nothing at all.

By the time I had my hunger, and my emotions under control, I also had the remains of four more creatures to drag back to our little camp. I tossed them into the fire Jasper had started to destroy the evidence of our massacre.

"All finished?" Jasper questioned in that lazy drawl of his that I found more and more annoying by the day.

I nodded stiffly.

"You know, you're going to have to talk to me eventually. Us being brothers and all." His obvious amusement grated on my already raw nerves.

I took a seat on the ground across from him, staring into the dancing flames. "We're not really brothers, Jasper," I denied quietly.

"Well, that's news to me," he muttered skeptically.

Why was he baiting me? It was impossible that he didn't feel my irritability, considering I was making absolutely no attempt to hide it.

"Have we got the same mother?" I questioned archly, glancing into his coolly bemused face through the orange flicker.

"Esme," he replied instantly.

I sighed. "I'm not going to play this juvenile game with you, Jasper."

He shrugged, leaning back on his elbows to stare into the sky.

I grit my teeth. How could he be so calm, so accepting of what had almost happened three days ago? I had almost taken a human life, and not just any human life. I had almost killed Bella. And I'd definitely slaughtered any bond that had existed between Emmett and myself. Not to mention the trust my family had had in me.

I was the new Jasper, I decided with a bitter grin. They were going to be watching me constantly, ensuring that I fed at least every few days. They'd inconspicuously glance into my eyes for that telltale sign that I'd fallen off the wagon. The idea was unbearable.

_So what the hell is really bothering you?_

Jasper's voice intruded upon my mind, and I frowned. I'd often wished for the ability to block others' thoughts. Now was certainly one of those times.

"Well, in case you don't recall, I almost killed Bella."

"Yes, I suppose you did." _But you didn't. You didn't even really hurt her. Emmett probably cracked her ribs with his manhandling, you just left a few bruises._ He added as an unneeded afterthought, _And some emotional scarring._

"Yeah, that's _all_. I may as _well_ have injured her for the way that she looks at me now. Those big baleful eyes staring accusingly at me like I'm going to maul her at any second." I sighed heavily, knowing I was being unfair. Her feelings were more than justified, I just…I couldn't stand that she was scared of me.

_It's nothing that you can't repair, Edward, just give it some time._

"I don't want to give it time!" I snapped, jumping to my feet in my agitation. Emotions that I'd bottled up for days now were bubbling over, and there was little I could do to stop them.

"Whoa," Jasper muttered, sitting up, looking almost dizzy.

"What?" I demanded, pacing.

"You're a mess. Calm down," he admonished. "This is more than just remorse, Eddie. What's going on with you?" His face was serious now, and he stared at me with quiet intensity.

I shook my head, raking my hands through my already disheveled hair. "I don't know Jasper, I just…"

_Spit it out._

"I need to know," I muttered, coming to a halt before his seated form. "Just, tell me the truth. What is there between you and Bella?"

He sighed heavily, rolling his eyes. "Seriously? You're back to this?"

I crouched swiftly, meeting his gaze somberly.

"Just tell me, Jasper, I need to know."

"Jesus Christ, Edward, you already _do_ know. I've _already_ told you." He gave me a swift shove, forcing me away from him. I easily caught my balance.

"Then why are you so defensive whenever I bring it up?"

He blew a long breath out, looking quite irritable now. I sifted through his thoughts, seeking hidden meaning behind his words.

"Maybe because I expect you to believe me when I tell you there is absolutely nothing happening between Bella and myself."

"I can't!" I exploded. "You didn't see her thoughts, Jasper! She was thinking utterly…lascivious things about you! And liking them! I can't imagine her doing that unless there was _something_…"

"Edward, listen to yourself!" he suddenly interrupted, looking torn between amusement and frustration. "Now stop, for just one second. Separate yourself from whatever feelings you have about me, or about Bella, and take a breath." I glared at him, waiting for the point. "Okay? You can read minds, isn't that correct?"

"You already know the answer to th…"

"Isn't that correct?" he demanded staunchly.

"Yes," I all but growled.

"So, in your listening to the musings of human minds, do you ever find yourself the subject of their thoughts?"

What the hell was he getting at?

"Yes," I replied ungraciously.

"And are these thoughts ever…" He paused here to grin, no doubt at my word choice. "…lascivious in nature?"

"Of course. Jasper, you already know all of this. Humans are very preoccupied by the subject of sex."

"I see, I see," he answered, frowning thoughtfully and scratching his chin. "Of course, because of these _lascivious_ thoughts, you must have relations of a _libidinous_ nature with all of these mortals."

"Don't be absurd," I scoffed, ignoring his pointed ridicule of my vocabulary. "Humans have very creative minds. I'm surprised they even go after the real thing, considering some of obscene creations they…come up with." The light of realization must've dawned on face, because the corner of Jasper's mouth went up in a half smile.

"Huh. The imaginations of those crazy humans. Would've thunk it?"

I turned narrowed eyes on him. "So you expect me to believe that Bella, our innocent little Bella, _made up_ these images of the two of you? I just…I find that difficult to conceive."

"Edward, she's not a child anymore! She's a young woman, almost fully grown. Why would she be different than any of the rest of them?"

I frowned, not appreciating Jasper's comparison. She _was_ different. Perhaps not in terms of cognizance, but there was something about her…

"Trust me, Jasper, I am well aware that she's no longer a child."

That certainly gave him pause, and I realized, a moment too late, that I'd revealed more than intended. I glanced up at the stars, hoping he wasn't going to push me. Apparently I'd forgotten to whom I was speaking.

"What the hell does that mean?" His voice was quiet, holding just a hint of threat.

"Nothing," I replied a tad too hastily.

"No, no. Come on now, we're doing the brotherly bonding thing. Tell me."

"It's nothing. Just leave it alone."

His stare was brooding, before he nodded, far too quickly for me to feel assured that the topic was no longer up for discussion.

"Well, you know, now that we're talking about it, it might not be a bad idea to pursue Bella on a romantic level," he finally muttered.

I turned a bewildered stare on him, barely managing to choke out a "What?"

He didn't respond, so I tuned into his mind, the image there almost blinding me with my sudden, all-consuming rage.

Bella was laying in a small, sunlit meadow, smiling coyly. Her dark curls were tousled, her chocolate eyes heavy lidded. Her shirt was composed of little more than a scrap of material and to say her skirt was indecent would be a compliment. She shifted slightly, the fabric easing up her thighs.

"Stop it," I growled softly.

Her small hands rose to the indecently tight blouse she was wearing, and she slowly slid the first button free. A tiny sliver of her pink brassiere was revealed, and I fisted my hands.

"Stop it!" I shouted, leaping at Jasper before I'd even realized my intent.

The images vanished, and I stumbled back, clutching at my head, trying to rid myself of the ideas Jasper had planted.

"Why does it matter?" he taunted softly.

"I don't know," I gasped, trying to get a grip of the emotions wreaking havoc on my good intentions.

"Well, I'm going to ask Bella out, as soon as we get back then," he replied a bit smugly.

"No!" I exclaimed, unsure of where the words were even coming from.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm in love with her!"

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**A/N: Ooooh, Edward & Bella, sitting in a tree...except for that whole part where he tried to eat her and whatnot.**

**Let me know what you think. :)**


	6. Feelings

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A/N: Sorry for the length of time on this update. I had some difficulty getting things to come out the way I wanted them to. Anyway, here it is, I hope you enjoy it. Please feel free to leave me feedback if you do! :)

**To answer a query I've gotten in a couple reviews: Jacob Black will not play any sort of role in this story. Supporting or otherwise. If he makes an appearance it will be brief and insignificant.**

**The recognizable songs listed in the following chapter are available for your listening pleasure via youtube. I also don't own them, or anything to do with them.**

**Enjoy!**

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Calefaction

Chapter 5

Feelings

Three days.

Jasper and Edward had been gone for three long days.

And quite frankly, my guilt was starting to become a little overwhelming.

Not that I was necessarily eager to have them around. No; my comfort level with last week's surreal occurrences hadn't quite reached the stage of acceptance just yet. The emotion invoked by recollections of my multiple near misses in a single day waffled between distressed, irritated and infuriated. So I wasn't particularly looking _forward_ to spending quality time with the two of them; but all the same, this was their home, and I felt wretched to have played a part in their temporary ejection.

Sighing heavily, I meandered through the almost eerily quiet house, seeking diversion from my relentless thoughts.

Emmett and Rosalie had escaped the madness for a bit, heading up to Seattle for a couple days. I certainly didn't begrudge them their needed 'alone time', but I did miss the perpetual entertainment I could usually count on Emmett for. The house seemed incredibly empty without his boisterous laughter. And though I'd never admit it aloud, I'd had a terrible time falling asleep last night without him.

I wandered idly into the sprawling living room, trailing my fingertips over the back of one of several oversized wing chairs. Murky sunlight, filtered into an opaque gray veil by a predictable wall of rain clouds, glistened hazily through the spotless windows. I slumped into the comfortable leather armchair sullenly.

Normally I'd just curl up with a good book on a day like this, but I'd yet to recover the goods damaged by Rose and Em's little brawl. Esme had done an amazing job, as per usual, restoring my room to its previous immaculate glory (shelves rebuilt, hole patched, even the carpet had been replaced), but replenishing my suddenly meager book inventory was going to take a pretty hefty trip to several book stores. And the antique mirror would require some serious scavenging to replace. Emmett had promised to take me up to Port Angeles, and possibly even Seattle as soon as he got back.

This unfortunately didn't help me with my current ennui.

At this point, I'd even endure an endless session of Alice's favorite game, "Dress Up Bella", but my elfin sister was lost in one of the all consuming productions of her creative mind. She'd spread a huge canvas on the floor of her bedroom and she was currently flitting from corner to corner, oil paints in hand, capturing her fickle ideas in corporeal form.

It amused me to no end that Alice was almost never satisfied with the pieces she created. More often than not she would eye her work critically, lips pulled into a sullen moue, and declaring that it was 'completely pedestrian', or some other snooty art connoisseur phrase, she'd throw it out.

This struck me as odd.

After all, Alice had the gift of future sight, and I couldn't imagine her being unable to see the finished piece, before she'd even started. I'd approached her with my theory, with the last, amazingly beautiful in my opinion, watercolor she'd created, and promptly destroyed. She'd grinned, just that matter-of-fact smile that often graced her pixy-like features, and replied airily, "What else is there to do with my time?"

I chuckled, glancing at the ceiling as though it might open up to allow me a brief glimpse at my sister.

But Emmett and Rose weren't around, so that was unlikely.

I tapped my feet, a repetitive little motion that rumbled along the glossy hardwood floor, as I glanced around the beautiful living room of our relatively new house. Though we'd only been here a few months, it already felt like home. I supposed that this was because home was not a matter of wood and carpet, plaster and tile; not really. Corny and sentimental as it was, I'd always considered home to be wherever my family was. Which was probably for the best, since we usually never stayed in one place for more than five or six years.

In fact, we'd just left Philomath, a quiet, cloudy little town in Oregon, this past June, shortly after school had been let out for the summer. Like the two small, sleepy cities we'd deserted previously (that I could remember), I didn't lament the move. It was an inevitability that I'd come to accept long ago.

There was really only one aspect of our constant relocation that I didn't like.

School.

Starting a new school was always tough, but when you were a Cullen? Welcome to the land of the social pariahs.

It wasn't so bad in elementary and middle school, since none of my siblings were young enough looking to attend with me. The awkward interrogations from my friends as to why they couldn't stay the night, or even come over, had always been a tad uncomfortable, but my excuses had solidified over the years, until the lies came so naturally that they may was well have been truth.

But high school, well...I shuddered to even remember. Alice, Jasper & Edward had been parading around as seniors when I'd entered the ninth grade, and for all their beauty and charisma, I'd never seen three people more ostracized. And of course, being their 'sibling', my name was scribbled at the bottom of the high school blacklist without question.

No one ever said anything to my siblings' faces, of course. Perhaps they understood, at least on some basic, instinctual level, that taunting the elder Cullens was to flirt with a danger far more profound than the looming prospect of detention.

So, I took the brunt of it. The whispers, the sneers, the glares. The occasional foot in an aisle that sent me sprawling. You can't imagine how hard it was for me to hide those interactions from Edward and Alice. After all, the last thing we needed was for Emmett to fly off the handle and tear my bullies limb from limb. Literally.

Tenth grade had somehow been worse. Without the protection of my adopted family (they were excluded but frightening), well people hadn't even bothered to lower their voices when they were talking about me. Add my increasing awkwardness (thanks so much, adolescence, for hormones run amok and gangly coltishness) and my last year at Philomath High had really been a sort of hell on Earth.

I was hoping that this year would be at least a little bit better.

Edward and Alice were foregoing their usual sophomore route to join the junior class with me. They claimed it was just because they were more eager than usual to finish school, but I had a feeling that they were suspicious of the last couple of years' activities. The idea had solidified quite a bit when I'd gotten my schedule last week and come to the realization that I didn't have a single class without another Cullen present.

Jasper had opted for the expeditious, yet still slightly sociable option of taking a single year as a senior. Rose was skipping the bothersome chore of school altogether this time. I have to admit, I was jealous of their choices when we'd discussed the subject at the table a few weeks back. But Edward had reminded me, with a bit of a grin, how many years they'd been doing this, and I hadn't been able to hang onto that envy for very long.

Of course, there was still the matter of Emmett, who had decided, much to Rosalie's disappointment, to hang back as a junior with Alice, Edward and myself. I had a feeling that this decision was based in large part on me, but I wisely said nothing on the subject. That was a conversation best left for Rose and Em.

They'd destroyed half of Esme's garden in their 'discussion' on the matter.

I chuckled, slipping out of the chair and crossing the room to the opulent bookcase that displayed family pictures. It should be an interesting year, at least.

I ran my fingertips lightly along the edge of one of the shelves, glancing over the hundreds of framed images. There were a couple very fragile looking photographs of only Carlisle, Edward and Esme. Smiling, of course. Almost a hundred years old…I shook my head. Next, slightly clearer, were a small group with the addition of Rosalie, and then Emmett. Laughter seemed a common theme in any photo that contained Emmett. The edges of my lips quirked into a smile. The quality of the pictures became better and the family extended its welcome to Alice and Jasper. Jasper looked fairly miserable in the earlier photos, brows creased, frowning; it really almost looked as though he were in pain. I followed the line of pictures with my eyes as his features slowly began to smooth out, until his expression was one of relaxed happiness that matched Alice's mischievous grin and Edward's sarcastic smile. And finally…there I was.

Sometimes it was far too easy to forget how long they'd been around.

Carlisle was pushing three hundred and fifty years as a vampire, Jasper one hundred and fifty. To actually stop and think of that, think of how many years they had left ahead of them…it was mind-boggling.

I stared at the most recent set of photos, frowning thoughtfully. It was strange, to see myself changing, slowly growing older, essentially dying, while they all remained perfect and constant. Truth be told, I hated it. But until my eighteenth birthday, there wasn't a whole lot to be done for it.

I plopped down onto the sleek piano bench with a sigh. Just eleven more months and I'd be able to give Carlisle my decision. Edward and Rose would be furious. But this was a resolution I had never faltered upon. I'd known, for as long as I could remember, that this was something that I wanted more than anything. I just…wanted to be with them forever.

I stroked the top of the keyboard cover, suddenly pushing it back. My fingers came to rest on the familiar ivory keys of their own accord, my feet positioning themselves near the piano's pedals. I hadn't played in some time, but the knowledge was all right there. The only thing missing was…I glanced at the bench beside me, realizing with a start that I'd never played without Edward.

For a brief, silly moment, the idea that I may not be able to without him flashed through my mind. Ridiculous, really. I silently reminded myself that my talent did not reside in Edward's presence, regardless of how much he'd taught me.

As if I had given myself some secret, needed permission, my fingers began to move, slowly at first, but with more confidence as the strains of Chopin's Nocturne Four began to dance gently on the air.

I closed my eyes, losing myself in the easy melody. My fingertips stroked each of the keys precisely, never once hesitating as the notes rose and fell, invoking emotion as only beautiful music can.

Edward's voice sounded quietly in my mind, a memory of seldom given praise. _'Excellent Bella.' _I could almost hear the smile in the words.

I frowned, forcing the recollection away, my hands pausing for several seconds.

The crescendo of the song was fierce; a string of swift, hard notes, and I took great pleasure in the intense sound that echoed throughout the room, mirroring my chaotic thoughts.

Reluctantly, the music died back down into a slow, poignant tune. My fingertips almost caressed each key now, seducing it of its gentle notes. I swayed lightly, enjoying the freedom of playing without fear of critique. In this, at least, my clumsiness remained absent. I was starting to think my feet just had it out for me.

I was almost disappointed as the final note rang quietly.

I sat there for several moments after the conclusion, my eyes closed.

"Beautiful, Bella," a pleased female voice interrupted, and I blinked rapidly, looking around in surprise.

Esme was sitting in the chair I'd abandoned earlier, watching me with such a loving smile that I couldn't help but return the sentiment, despite the fact that she'd scared the pants off me.

I shrugged, flushing at her compliment. "It was alright, I guess."

She laughed softly. "You've become as good as Edward."

Well, now I knew she was lying. When it came to hand-eye coordination there was no way I had a vampire beat. And I didn't have near enough creativity to actually compose, as Edward did.

"Not even close," I argued. "But he does have a couple of years on me."

She chuckled. "Yes, his technique is flawless, isn't it?

I nodded, watching my hands trace over the smooth keys.

"But you invest yourself wholly."

I glanced back up, a question in my eyes and perched on the tip of my tongue.

"Edward doesn't?"

"Mmm," she answered noncommittally. "Sometimes. He's such a perfectionist that I often wonder if he forgets that there is more to be had than perfect technique."

I pondered her words. Everything I'd ever heard Edward play had been absolutely impeccable, but I couldn't deny that it often seemed as though he was sacrificing _something_, some unnamable element, in his quest for absolute perfection.

"Play that one I like?" Esme asked suddenly with such a child-like grin that I couldn't very well deny her.

"It's not as good with just the piano," I suggested half-heartedly, referring to the normally strings-riddled Palladio that was unquestionably Esme's favorite, other than Edward's original compositions.

"You know I love it."

I slid back around, easing my fingers back up over the keys.

My left hand began a low, steady rhythm, my right introducing the catchy, clever collection of notes that set up the rest of the song.

It was amazing to me, how easily I remembered everything that Edward had taught me. My fingers were swift and sure, and though they were lacking that enviable vampire grace and precision, they were incessant and unwavering.

The complex melody filled the room, and I heard Esme make a quiet sound of approval. I smiled faintly, my hands moving down the keyboard.

"Beautiful," a silken voice intoned quietly near my ear. It was impossible not to know who it belonged to. They were home, then.

My fingers faltered, slipping and clanging discordantly. I frowned, letting the song die as I pulled my hands back completely.

"Edward," I greeted him quietly, glancing over my shoulder to ensure that Esme was still around. She was seated as she had been, though frowning now.

"Bella," he returned. "No need to stop on my account, I hadn't realized how progressed your skill has become."

I nodded slightly, fidgeting with the hem of my shirt. It was strange, to have Edward so close. It was incredibly familiar, and yet, with the events that had transpired, I found myself on edge.

"I don't really feel much like playing anymore," I declared rather lamely, reaching up to pull the cover down. His pale hand stopped me, pushing it back. His fingers took the places mine had recently abandoned, and he began to play quietly. It was something he had written, a piece that required two players.

I watched him quietly from beneath my lashes, listening to the rising notes as he played the instrument intimately, coercing the exact sound he required from the strings and hammers. His touch was delicate, so swift that at times I had difficulty following the motions of his hands. I felt my heart begin to slow, to match the rhythm set by his fingers.

Still Esme watched us. I couldn't decipher her expression.

Tugging my lower lip between my teeth, I capitulated to the silent request. Calming my trembling fingers, I forced them back onto the keys. Edward's playing slowed, assuming a pace he knew I could match. My first several strokes were hesitant, and I couldn't begin to sort through the jumbled assortment of my thoughts. On one hand this was Edward, someone I'd known and trusted my entire life. On the other, he'd tried to kill me.

We were sitting so close. Could he smell my blood?

His fingers slipped briefly, a single harsh keystroke jangling dissonantly.

"Sorry about that," he murmured. He recovered quickly, picking up where he'd left off.

Our fingers moved in tandem, creating a slow, haunting melody that echoed sullenly. Was this how Edward was feeling? Sad? Depressed? Did he have any right to feel those things?

His fingers came down forcefully, causing me to jump with the sudden volume of the notes he created. His hands began to move quickly dominating the keyboard, until I was forced to withdraw. I watched him quietly. The verse he played was nothing that I had ever heard before. It spoke easily of a fierce, deep-seated pain, resonating hollowly as his hands made use of only the left end of the piano.

He turned then, meeting my eyes head-on, and I swallowed convulsively. His topaz eyes mirrored the melody he created. There was sorrow there, fear and anger. At me? At himself? I couldn't begin to guess, and he didn't seem as though he were about to answer my thoughts.

There was also something else…something I couldn't name. I leaned closer, slightly, staring more deeply into his eyes, before he suddenly turned away, breaking our staring contest.

Well, two could play at this game.

Elbowing into his space, I placed my hands on the cool keys, drawing from the agonizing memories of the past several days. Edward's melody died as my fingers moved without further prompting, words unnecessary as the ringing notes of my terror, my love, my insecurity echoed wildly. I closed my eyes, swallowing against the sudden lump in my throat, swaying slightly with the melodic manifestation of my emotions.

Edward shifted next to me, and suddenly his piece was winding its way around mine, a low, heavy counterpoint. Together, they created something very beautiful, but amazingly heart-wrenching.

We continued like that for several minutes, playing off of one another's misery, calling the other's pain and raising it. Our hands battled for space on the piano's keyboard, each of us desperate to get our message across when we were unable to find the words to do so.

Eventually the agonizing, cathartic music wound down, until each of us had resumed our personal space. The same final note, octaves apart, rang out quietly at our conclusion.

We both stilled, sitting silently, refusing to look at the other. What we had just done felt so much more personal than speaking ever could have.

A small breath from behind us caught both of our attention, and we glanced back at the same moment. Esme was staring at us with wide eyes, her hand resting over her still heart.

"That…was stunning," she murmured.

I blinked. To be honest, I'd completely forgotten her presence. Edward at least, had the presence of mind to be polite.

"Thank you, Esme," he replied warmly.

"Was that one of your creations, Edward?" She sounded slightly doubtful, perhaps because of what we had discussed earlier.

"Hm? Oh, no. That was…Well, I'm not entirely sure what that was," he laughed quietly.

"It was lovely."

I frowned, standing abruptly. To think that our dual despair had created something so lovely was a disturbing thought.

I turned away, stilling as an idea suddenly occurred to me.

"Edward?" I murmured.

"Yes, Bella?"

_This doesn't mean I forgive you._

"I know."

We both knew that I wasn't being completely honest.

* * *

Several hours had elapsed since my bizarre encounter with Edward. I'd taken to my room, curling up on the bed with a minimally damaged copy of Tom Sawyer. True, it was missing half of the first chapter, but I'd read it often enough to have the plot down pat. Music was playing quietly in the background, an interesting band I'd discovered recently that blended beautiful classical strings and heady bass-driven pop.

It was right about there that Jasper found me.

I didn't even notice how long he'd been standing in my doorway, glancing up only when he drawled lazily,

"What the hell is this crap?"

I shot him a glare, snapping my book closed. "Sorry, they can't all be 'My wife left me and my truck broke down after rolling backwards out of my driveway and hitting my dog, my one and only friend.'" You could say I wasn't the biggest fan of some of the country music Jasper enjoyed.

There was a brief pause where I pondered that perhaps taunting a vampire who'd almost attacked me might not be the wisest of moves, but Jasper simply tipped his head back and uttered a sharp bark of laughter. I realized suddenly that it was a pretty rare occurrence for me to here that particular sound coming out of that particular mouth.

"Oh, Bella, you are too much."

I chuckled, inching back until I was sitting against the headboard. Grabbing one of my pillows, I hugged it to my chest, my nerves jangling slightly. True, I hadn't seen Jasper with his proverbial fangs out, but he had looked at me like dinner, and that disturbing image was hard to banish.

Emmett had told me that Jasper never intended to hurt me, not like Edward had. Enquiring minds, of course, wanted to know how Emmett could've possibly come to that conclusion. Jasper had, after all, attacked Carlisle, who was protecting me. Emmett had just shrugged his broad shoulders, offered me a rather goofy grin, and declared, "If Jasper had wanted you, he would've gone after you. He attacked Carlisle to keep himself occupied until we could get you safe."

An interesting theory. I wanted to believe it, of course, but now that Jasper and I were alone, I was finding it more and more difficult.

Jasper strode into the room, perching on the edge of my bed. He glanced me over speculatively.

"How ya doin?"

I shrugged. "Been better, been worse."

"Yeah? Worse than almost getting bitten by a vampire. You'll have to tell me about that sometime."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "You know what I mean. I'm doing alright now."

He nodded, suddenly lacing his hands behind his head and laying back. He stared at the canopy of my bed as though it were the most interesting thing he'd ever seen.

"Hey Bella?"

I looked at my toes. "Yeah?"

"I think we should talk."

I turned my attention on him curiously.

"We are talking."

He shifted, tipping onto his side, his head in his hand. He watched me intently.

"I had something specific in mind."

"Okay, shoot."

He nodded, almost absently, but remained silent.

Seconds, and then minutes ticked by. I fidgeted uncomfortably, wishing he'd get on with it already.

Just when I was going to break the increasingly awkward silence, he suddenly queried,

"What do you think about me?"

I blinked, taken aback. What…did I think about Jasper?

"What do you mean?" He was going to need to clarify this one.

"Well, I guess, how do you see me? Brother, friend, acquaintance, roommate…other?"

Other? What on Earth…Oh my God. No, he was _not_ bringing this up. Images, what I could remember of them, flashed through my mind, and I felt the blood rushing straight for my face. A wave of calm combated my rising panic, and I took a deep breath. C'mon Bella, you had to know this was coming.

"Umm…I guess, just a brother. A friend, sure. I've never…never really thought about you as anything else."

"Never?" he questioned skeptically, obviously referring to what Edward had seen in my head the night I'd been ill.

My blush deepened, and I hissed angrily, "Never intentionally!"

He held his hands up, as though expecting a physical attack. "Hey, okay. I was just asking."

A profoundly awkward silence ensued, before he blurted, "What about Edward?"

I closed my eyes, willing myself to find a bit of patience.

"What about him?" I ground out.

"Well, how do you see him?"

"Who?" A smooth voice interrupted the rather impolite answer I was about to give. I looked up to find Edward looming in the doorway, frowning quite severely in Jasper's direction.

"No one," Jasper said immediately, a little too quickly. I wanted to smack him across the back of the head. Edward had probably heard the entire conversation, never mind our thoughts.

"Huh," Edward declared, suddenly making his way across the room and sitting cross-legged at the end of the bed.

Because it wasn't bad enough to be in a room with just one of the vampires that had wanted to drink my blood. Collect the set!

"Bella," Edward whispered, pained.

I frowned and glanced at the ceiling.

"We were just discussing how Bella is in love with me," Jasper suddenly declared airily.

I shot him an incredulous look, he smiled in return.

Edward rolled his eyes. "Is that so?"

Jasper nodded rather solemnly, and I felt my lips twitch with the sudden impulse to grin. "Oh yes. We're going to be married as soon as possible. A spring wedding, isn't that right, dear?" He attempted to grab my hand, but I pulled away quickly. I had no idea what he was playing at. I looked at Edward, hoping for some insight, but all he could offer was a shrug.

"I see. Best of luck to you."

"Luck?" Jasper scoffed, glancing over his shoulder at Edward. "You've seen what goes on in Bella's head, do you really think I need luck?"

I grit my teeth, while I noted Edward's hands fisted in my comforter.

"That's quite enough out of you, Jasper." I declared prissily.

He grinned, a cocky male grin that made me want to kick him in the teeth.

Edward laughed. "You'd break your foot."

"It'd be worth it," I declared vehemently.

"Not fair," Jasper sulked.

"What's not fair?" A deep voice inquired, and again my head snapped toward the door. An immense figure filled out the frame, and I couldn't help but grin. Guess a day and a half was enough quality time.

"Emmett!" I shrieked happily.

He laughed, took a couple steps, and then dove onto the bed. There was an awful creaking groan, and then a brief, dizzying feeling of weightlessness as the legs collapsed out from under us and the box spring crashed to the floor.

"Dammit, Em, home two seconds and you're already back to destroying my room," I complained.

Edward looked stunned, while Jasper had assumed a rather irritable expression.

"Boys, what's going on up there?!" Esme called from downstairs. I grinned, as she didn't include me in the obvious trouble-making.

The three of them shouted in unison, "Nothing!"

Emmett made himself comfortable, and I shot him a appreciative glance. I was glad to have him around, just in case.

"So what were you whining about? Something being not fair?"

"I wasn't whining. I was just saying that it's rather rude for the two of them," he inclined his head first toward Edward, and then myself, "to be talking about whatever he picks out of her head."

"Oh yeah, that is annoying," Emmett agreed, and I scowled at him.

"And we were discussing Bella and Jasper's wedding," Edward smirked.

I could feel Emmett go completely still next to me, and shot a sympathetic glance toward Jas. This ought to be fun.

"What?" Emmett growled.

"Yeah," Edward continued relentlessly. "He was talking about how easy it'd be for him to get her, you know, since she was having all those impure thoughts about him."

"What?!" Emmett shouted now.

I silently wished for the floor to open right up and swallow me. Any second now…

"Oh, you didn't know? That's what had Jasper and I in such bad graces the other evening. Bella was thinking about taking Jasper to bed…Well no, actually, they were in the water, but you understand my meaning. And I assumed, of course, that he must have done something to provoke such thoughts. He hadn't, so obviously, Bella just wants him. You know, for sexual intercourse."

I was going to die. It seemed like a pretty basic fundamental of physiology that if all the blood in your body was suddenly centered only in your face you would die. Right? Please let me die.

Tense silence reigned for about a half a minute, during which Edward looked smug, and far too pleased with himself. Poor Jasper was like a deer in headlights, obviously regretting his decision to taunt Edward. And Emmett…Emmett looked like he wanted to kill someone. I inched away from him.

"Bella?" he said quite calmly.

"Yes?" I hedged.

"You are never, _never_ going to have sex, do you understand me? Not with Jasper, not with anyone."

If it meant we could drop this topic, I'd really agree to just about anything at this point.

"Okay, Emmett. No sex. Got it."

He nodded, as though that settled everything, but Jasper was laughing.

"C'mon Emmett, that's unreasonable."

"It's not! Bella is still practically a child."

"Hey!" I exclaimed, disgruntled.

"She's nearly of age," Edward suddenly argued in my favor, and I glanced at him in confusion. He refused to meet my gaze.

Sighing heavily, I threw myself back on the pillows, closing my eyes as the three began a debate that was enough to make me cringe. Everything from menstruation to development was being discussed…As if the first time I'd had to endure it, it wasn't bad enough…

_

* * *

__Seventh grade. Just about the time for sex education classes. _

_A lot of kids in class were snickering about the non-necessity of said educational opportunity, considering what they already knew from television, older siblings, or even their own parents. It was the single school subject upon which I felt wholly unprepared. I decided that rather than make a fool of myself, I would just ask Carlisle. He'd never denied me the opportunity to further my education._

_I bounded into the house that afternoon, dropped my backpack at the door, and headed straight up to Carlisle's study. Lucky for me, it was his day off. _

_He was bent over a gigantic medical tome when I arrived. I knocked politely on the door frame, though the door was open. He glanced up, a bright smile suddenly lighting his incredibly handsome face._

"_Bella!" he exclaimed. "Come in, come in." He beckoned me over, and I scurried across the room, plopping into one of the comfy chairs in front of his desk. He stood, leaned over, and brushed a kiss to the top of my head. I smiled._

"_To what do I owe this pleasure? With it being such a nice day I figured you'd be out with Emmett, or perhaps riding with Jasper." He retook his seat, his attention fully on me. I began to feel slightly nervous._

"_Well," I hedged, "we're going to be starting some lessons in school soon, and I don't feel that I'm really quite prepared for them." So it was a roundabout way of doing this, I wasn't quite ready to just blurt out my question._

_Carlisle looked mildly surprised by my declaration. This man was a task-master when it came to knowledge acquisition. I could tell he was pretty shocked that we were going to be covering something he hadn't already at least begun to teach me._

"_Really?" he murmured, obviously wracking his brain for something he'd missed. I figured I should probably put him out of his misery._

"_Yeah. You see," I took a deep breath. "We're going to be starting…well…" I lowered my voice slightly, completely unnecessarily. "Sex ed classes." I flushed, glancing at the floor._

_There was silence for perhaps a millisecond, followed by a sudden clamor. The sound of multiple feet on the steps, as well as some mild cursing reached me, just before Edward and Emmett were both shoving their way into the room, glaring at one another as they tried to push through the door frame at the exact some moment. Jasper gave each of them a shove and was the first to enter, looking bemused but calm. The other two were hot on his heels._

"_What's going on in here?" Emmett demanded._

_Carlisle appeared to be fighting laughter._

"_Well, I was just going to have a fairly important talk with Bella," he said, when he'd gotten himself under control._

"_About what?" Edward asked offensively._

"_None of your business," I replied ungraciously._

"_Don't you think she's a little _young_ for this talk, Carlisle?" Emmett was pacing in front of the door. I noticed that Rosalie was standing in its frame, looking tense. Jasper slid lazily into the chair beside mine, looking rather amused by the entire situation. Frankly, things were getting way too crowded for my comfort. I mean, I knew they'd all be able to hear, but did they need to be in here?_

"_Yes," Edward stated, unyieldingly. I stuck my tongue out at him._

_Carlisle shot us a curious glance, before answering Emmett. "Well, Emmett, I can teach her the basics, or we can allow the public school system to do so. Or her classmates."_

_Emmett didn't appear to be pleased with any of the options._

"_Why does she need to learn about this?" he argued._

_Really? _

_Carlisle seemed about as astonished as I felt. "Emmett, do you think she's going to remain a child forever? Eventually she's going to meet a mate."_

"_No!" Emmett and Edward exploded at precisely the same moment. _

_Okay, this was getting out of hand. I stood abruptly, the chair toppling back behind me in my haste. _

"_Enough!" I exclaimed loudly. "Carlisle is going to educate me on this subject. If you don't think you can handle it, _get out_!"_

_Jasper leaned back, righting my chair, and I smiled at him, resuming my seat._

_Carlisle looked pleased by my stand. I heard Rose, Em and Edward all take seats against the back wall. No doubt pouting. I leaned forward, knowing that this was probably going to be slightly embarrassing, but eager for the knowledge all the same._

_Carlisle retrieved several medical journals from the immense shelves lining the walls. He flipped them open and set them before me. Emmett was at my side in the blink of an eye, glancing over the pages. He quickly slapped a hand down on top of the topmost book, shielding it from my gaze._

"_Obscene," he decided._

_I tried to push his hand away, but he was completely stubborn._

"_Emmett, take a seat, or leave," Carlisle said, in that quiet, commanding voice that brooked no disobedience. Em hesitated, finally relinquishing his grasp on the book and trudging back to his chair._

_I leaned forward, flushing slightly as I gave a quick assessing glance to the pages spread before me. Human anatomy. This much at least, I was fairly familiar with. Perhaps not all of the male parts, but we'd gone over the female parts when I'd gotten my first period._

_Edward made a small, strangled sound from the other side of the room, and I dusted those thoughts under the rug._

"_Alright, Bella, you know the productive cycle of a woman. For men, it's quite different. Rather than a short period of time during a given month, most men are fertile fairly consistently. In a male specimen who has reached sexual maturity, the testicles, here," he gestured at the diagram in front of me, and I peered at the images, ignoring the collective, astonished murmurs from our audience, "produce and store sperm."_

_He continued with his explanation, and I could feel the growing unease from behind me. Jasper at least, was quiet on the subject._

_Of course when we reached the actual reproductive act, it was really too much to have supposed the tentative peace could continue._

"_Now, the reason for intercourse has always been for reproduction, however, you'll find that this isn't always the motivation behind the undertaking," Carlisle was explaining._

"_When two people love each other very much…" Emmett suddenly interrupted. I turned a glare on him._

"_People don't have to be in love to have sex," Jasper declared idly._

_Carlisle cleared his throat. "We'll leave the ethical debate for another day, hmm boys?"_

_Emmett sullenly sat back in his chair, while Jasper arched a brown, lips quirked in a grin._

"_Now, whatever the catalyst for the decision to proceed with intercourse, please be aware of the possible negative side effects that may arise. These aren't meant to scare you, Bella, you're a smart girl. Take these at face value. Pregnancy is, of course, a significant concern, as well as sexually transmitted diseases, which can be not only disagreeable, but lethal." _

_I nodded solemnly. Yikes. The giggling girls in my class hadn't mentioned the possibility of death in their excited ramblings._

"_When a man becomes aroused, tissues in the penis fill with blood and it becomes erect."_

"_Carlisle!" Edward admonished. I glanced over my shoulder in surprise. For that tone of voice, you'd think Carlisle had offered to give me a demonstration first hand._

"_Bella!" Edward suddenly used 'the voice' on me, and I flushed. Oh yeah, mind reader._

"_Okay, Edward, out." Carlisle jerked his thumb toward the door._

_Edward looked flustered, something I'd never seen before, and it amused me to no end. He stood with as much dignity as he could muster and stalked out of the room._

_One down. I was sure it was only a matter of time before the others…I grinned._

_We made it to insertion before Emmett broke the arms off the chair he was seated in. Carlisle gave him the boot, and Rosalie followed swiftly on his heels. I wondered if Jasper was going to make it._

_He didn't. With explanation of the act in process, he declared cheekily,_

"_You know those noises you sometimes hear from Emmett and Rose's room?"_

_There were several angry shouts from around the house, and Jasper was evicted as well._

_Needless to say, with the peanut gallery gone I was able to look at things from a purely academic standpoint and I was more than ready for sex ed the following week._

* * *

But this…this was exceptionally intolerable. I decided to take Carlisle's lead on this one.

"Okay guys," I declared, pushing myself up. "The human needs her rest. Everybody out."

They seemed surprised by the sudden assertion of my authority. We all knew that physically I'd never be able to force them to leave, but a quick shout to Esme…

Edward grimaced, leaping off the bed agilely. "She means it, fellas."

Jasper followed, stretching, as though his muscles could even get tired. I rolled my eyes. Their practiced human mannerisms were a constant source of amusement.

"You want me to stay tonight, Bells?" Emmett asked, leaning forward to tuck a stray lock of hair behind my ear.

I shook my head just a little to fiercely. "No, thanks." The last thing I needed was to have some strange dream based on this conversation and to start talking in my sleep. My room had sustained enough damage without unintentional provocation of my fiercely overprotective brother.

"Alright, well, I'll be around all night, so come get me if you need me."

I smiled, leaning in to kiss his cheek.

"Will do, Em. We going shopping tomorrow?"

He groaned, halfway to the door. Obviously he'd hoped I'd forget.

Yeah right.

"Of course, Bella, whatever you want."

I changed into some comfy pajamas, sliding under the covers of my noticeably closer to the ground bed, and curled up with a yawn. I'd have to think of some excuse for the sudden damage. I supposed I could just blame Emmett, which was usually the truth anyway, as was the case this time.

I was just reaching for the switch on my bedside lamp when a slight noise from near the door caught my attention. I glanced over curiously, surprised to see Edward standing there, gently illuminated against the dark backdrop of the hallway.

I smiled tentatively, still not completely at ease alone in his presence.

"Hey, what's up?"

"I was wondering if it'd be alright if I stayed in here tonight?"

I stared at him in silent surprise. I knew they had an extreme fascination with sleep, since it was the one ability I could lay claim to that they couldn't, and it wasn't unheard of for any of them to sit up and watch me during the night, but they usually crept in after I was long gone from the land of the conscious. Why was he asking…?

"I actually hoped to talk to you a bit," he clarified in response to my silent pondering.

The look on his face told me that this was something I probably wasn't prepared to hear, particularly in light of recent events. I shook my head gently.

"I think it'd be best if I were alone tonight, actually. I haven't really been sleeping well." _And I'm not comfortable being alone with you._

He grimaced as though I'd hit him, before nodding slowly.

"Alright then, I understand."

Did he?

His frown deepened, but he turned, his hand resting lightly on the doorknob as he made to close the door behind him.

"Hey Bella?"

I snuggled down into the blankets, reaching out the flip the light off.

"Mmhmm?"

He hesitated for the briefest of seconds. "Love you."

I smiled, eyelids already growing heavy. "Love you too, Edward."

* * *

**A/N: There you have it! Reviews are always welcome!**


	7. Hermione, Thor & Voldemort

**A/N: Thank you to everyone that reads and reviews my stories. It's incredibly encouraging! A special little shout out to Wanted - Hot Empathic Vampire, whose review, I stole a line from. (Thanks!)**

**For Team Jasper, this chapter's for you.**

**Be sure to read the author's note at the end of this chapter for an important question regarding a decision for the next chapter!**

**Chapter Six is Jasper PoV.**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter Six

Hermione, Thor & Voldemort

So...

Edward was in love with Bella.

Or so he claimed.

I had to admit, even with my ability to hone in on others' feelings, this had pretty much blind sided me. Edward had either become extremely proficient at hiding this particular emotion, or he was confusing it with something else. Neither idea was especially settling.

Alice and I had discussed the issue, not entirely to the extent which I'd have liked, on a hunt the other evening after Bella had decided she'd had enough of my brothers' and my presence.

* * *

"_So, I suppose you already know then," I hedged as we sped through the long, dark shadows of the forest._

_Alice's melodic laughter trilled quietly into the night as she slanted me a knowing glance. "You're going to have to be a little more specific, Jas."_

_I chuckled, leaping easily over a small ravine, admiring the dancer's grace of Alice's slender frame, outlined in the hazy silver moonlight, as she did the same. _

_I'd often wondered why, after all this time, nothing had developed between the two of us. The expectation had been there when she'd shown up to forcibly drag me out of the dark, violent din my life had become. I could still remember being awe-struck by her beauty, that mischievous smile set in delicate elfin features. Wide, tawny eyes that saw more than I could've possibly begun to imagine. It was more than that though. More than just her physical appearance. It was as though there were something inherently radiant striving to make itself known, shining gently from within. She was such a brilliant beacon in my otherwise bleak existence I would've followed wherever she led. _

_As it were, she led me directly to the Cullens, who had, much to my surprise, accepted us with open arms. _

_But adjustment to this vegetarian life style had been difficult for me. Restraint had never been an issue previously, because I'd never been forced to practice any, but now... To live amongst the very beings I'd considered nothing more than food for nearly one hundred years. Needless to say, my 'barely there' control put quite a strain on my newly forming familial bonds._

_None so much as that which I'd forged with Alice. She was a constant in my life. Unwavering support when I felt as though my demon were going to overpower what humanity I'd managed to retain. I had a feeling that this was, perhaps, why we'd never been able to slip out of the assumed roles of brother and sister, caretaker and dependent, and into those as lovers. And I knew that for the both of us, the time for such decisions had long since passed._

_As it turned out, I was alright with that. Or at the very least, I wasn't upset. I loved Alice dearly and wouldn't give up what we had for anything._

"_Jas?" she prompted with a grin._

"_Right." I shook my head lightly, clearing it of the past. "What I was referring to was Edward. _

_Specifically, his feelings toward Bella."_

_Alice made a tiny, scoffing sound as she took a swift, running leap, catching the branch of a nearby tree and flinging herself around it as well as any accomplished trapeze artist._

_I briefly took the small noise for disbelief, and was surprised to find myself pleased with the idea. Before I could examine why that might be, Alice continued._

"_Poor Edward is absolutely head over heels," she flipped once expertly, as if to visually prove her point, "desperately in love with poor, oblivious Bella." Laughing softly, she dropped silently to the ground, resuming her swift sprint. _

_Her validation gave me pause, and it took several seconds to surmount the rather large hurdle of the unexpected proclamation. Inexplicably, I was angry. Quite furious, actually. Why…_

_I caught up with her in several long strides. She looked bemused._

"_So he finally told you, hm? I knew it would be soon."_

"_How long have _you_ known?" I shot back._

_She rolled her eyes skyward briefly, as though she had to think about the answer. "Only about, five years or so now."_

_I stumbled._

_In an utterly Bella-esque fashion my feet managed to find some imaginary obstruction, and I pitched forward slightly. Unlike our human, I didn't end up face first on the ground, easily catching myself, but it was still rather embarrassing. If Alice noticed, she refrained from commenting._

"_Five years?!" I demanded incredulously._

_She shrugged, as though it were a perfectly natural length of time to hide the fact that your vampire brother would be harboring a crush for your human sister. _

"_Why didn't you tell anyone?!"_

_She paused, briefly, scenting the wind, before turning abruptly east with a nod of her head. When her eyes met mine, they were bewildered. "Why _would_ I tell anyone?"_

_I floundered. Just because Alice could see the future, I could feel others' emotions and Edward could read minds didn't mean we should necessarily share what we picked up on. It was an unspoken agreement between us and our family. Unless it was a matter of life and death, sometimes it was just best to keep these things to one's self. _

_Of course this was different. This was important!_

_I didn't think that argument would hold up in the court of the clairvoyant, so I bluffed. "Because Edward could be dangerous to her, and the rest of us for that matter! You saw what happened the other day. His jealousy almost cost Bella her life."_

_A tiny frown, something almost never seen on Alice's face, crossed her lips briefly. "Please don't try to manipulate me, Jasper. Do you honestly think I'd have kept such a thing secret for the sake of personal interests if it meant Bella was in jeopardy? Have a little faith."_

_An undercurrent of hurt washed toward me from Alice and my burgeoning guilt redoubled. Of course Alice would report potentially dangerous situations if she saw them. "Sorry," I mumbled._

_That airy smile was easily back in place, her feelings having rebounded in record time. "S'alright."_

_We continued in silence, though there was a question itching at the back of my mind. One that I very much doubted she would answer._

_As we approached a small herd of elk, I decided I'd never know if I didn't try._

"_Alice?"_

"_Mmm?" Her eyes had already begun to darken with her thirst as the swiftly beating hearts of the animals grew louder._

"_Will Bella return Edward's feelings?" _

_Why this was important, I didn't know. _

_Another mystery was why I was silently hoping that Alice said no._

_She looked at me then, tipping her head slightly to the side. I knew instantly that she wasn't about to break her self-imposed psychic-family confidentiality clause on this one._

_She uttered a small, "Hm", smiled that infuriatingly astute smile, and leapt onto the back of one of the large animals._

* * *

She'd refused to speak further on the subject, despite my threatening, cajoling, and all around obnoxiousness.

Thinking back, there was one thing that I really wished I'd have asked her before she closed the door on the topic.

What was Emmett going to do when he found out?

"Jasper, is this right? I feel like I'm about to fall off!"

I glanced up as Bella's voice broke through my musings. I chuckled, shaking my head as the amusing imagines of Emmett's fury were replaced by those of Bella, circling the paddock awkwardly on the back of her beautiful bay mare.

Now under normal circumstances, Bella was an excellent rider; probably because she wasn't relying on her own feet for transportation. Ten years of riding lessons from yours truly had probably helped as well.

But today…

Perhaps I'd optimistically misjudged her balance when I suggested she attempt a bit of bareback riding.

She'd received the purebred Arabian on her eleventh birthday and promptly named the poor creature Hermione. Let a young girl name a horse shortly after the release of Harry Potter and this is the result, I thought wryly. The horse had set Carlisle back about as much as an automobile would have, not to mention my black gelding, Thor, and Emmett's tobiano stallion, Voldemort. (Yes. Voldemort.) It'd been well worth it though, to see the expression on little Bella's face when Carlisle had prompted her to open her eyes.

She and the gentle animal had forged something of an immediate bond, and it was a rare occurrence to see the horse in a foul mood when Bella was around.

At the moment, however, it looked as though it wanted nothing more than to throw its rider and go graze with its stable-mates.

Sighing, I pushed away from the fence I'd been leaning against, a quick, assessing glance giving me a fairly good idea of the problem.

While her fingers were gripping the reins tightly, prompting the horse to slow, her calves were clenching against its sides, in an effort to keep her balance, signaling it to speed up.

"Jasper, I don't like this. Can't I just get my saddle?" she pleaded as I neared.

I took the reins, halting the horse, who somehow managed to look immensely grateful for my interference.

"You could," I drawled, looking up at her.

Alice had dressed her, as usual, in designer equestrian attire. The sleeves of a plain black t-shirt clung to the faint swell of her bicep, while a brown (coffee, Alice would argue) zip up vest hugged her torso. The unnecessarily tight matching riding pants made me glad that this was a privately owned stable, considering the way they clung to her like a second skin, disappearing at the calf into standard black leather boots.

Compared to my blue jeans, gray button-up, cowboy boots and hat, she seemed incredibly overdressed. But she never complained about the attire (aside from the helmet, which I refused to budge on), so I kept my opinion to myself.

She was frowning at me now, from under the ledge of said helmet, obviously expecting more. Growing impatient with my silence, she demanded, "_But_?"

"Buuut…I just thought you'd gotten good enough to take on a bit more of a challenge. If not, that's alright. I'll go get your saddle." I headed toward the stable.

She made a small sound of exasperation, suddenly exclaiming, "Wait!"

I turned back, hiding my smile. "Yes?"

"I want to learn, just show me what I'm doing wrong."

Never one to back down from a challenge; in that aspect she was far more like Emmett than was probably good for her.

"Alright, first of all, straighten up, you're leaning much too far forward."

"I don't want to fall. I do enough of that when I'm not ten feet up," she complained, but immediately began to ease back.

"You're not ten feet up, and even if you were, do you really think I'd let you fall?"

She had a vampire, possessed of preternatural speed and strength, and she thought she was going to end up in the dirt. If it'd been anyone else I'd be insulted.

Bella just grinned, shaking her head in disbelief. "Oh, if I'm going to fall, there's not a whole lot you can do to stop me. I'd probably just end up taking you with."

Alright, she might have a point there. I'd never seen any human so inherently prone to bad luck.

"Okay, I concede to that. But Bella," I grinned lazily, "you know I'll catch you every time."

The words were meant to be playful, teasing, but as I glanced up into her face, our eyes met, and I suddenly wanted her to understand the absolute truth behind them. She was so fragile, so…mortal. I would never think to restrict her actions, as my brothers were fond of doing, but I would always be there. To listen to her, to laugh with her, to save her, if necessary.

An image of _that night_ flashed in my mind.

The scent of her blood, the terror in her eyes. The need that that potent combination had invoked had almost been beyond bearing. The bloodlust had roused my demon from its prolonged dormancy, and it's demand had been swift and vicious, tearing through me until very little was left of my humanity.

But there had been a single greater necessity that pounded ruthlessly through my brain.

Bella must be kept safe.

Above hunting, above feeding, above all else. We were her protectors.

I was her protector.

And so, I'd taken on Carlisle, knowing that my unbridled rage and desire would make me clumsy, by vampire standards anyhow. He'd kept me occupied until all traces of her scent were banished.

I knew that Emmett had told her this.

I also knew that she didn't fully understand.

But, for some reason, I needed her to know now.

She watched me silently, her dark eyes wide. Finally, she smiled gently, giving a slight nod of her head. "Yes, Jasper, I know."

I nodded, something within me swelling slightly with the verbalization of her trust. After the insanity of the week previous I was surprised she'd even allowed me to take her on this outing. Of course, I hadn't chased her around the woods like a deranged beast, much as Edward had done.

A slight wave of panic washed over me, and I frowned, for a brief, ridiculous moment thinking that Bella must've found her way into my head. But no, that wasn't possible…

"Bella?" I questioned, just as the horse gave a fitful shake of its head; where unfortunately, Bella's hands were fisted in its mane. She shrieked, just as she began to slide sideways.

Laughter was, of course, an inappropriate response, so the glare I was the recipient of as the noise burst from between my lips was completely justified.

I caught a fistful of her vest and gave a slight tug, holding the reins tightly so as not to spook the horse. She yelped, sliding back toward me, nearly slipping off again. With a sigh, I rolled my eyes, wrapping an arm loosely around her waist as I vaulted up behind her.

"I swear, Bella."

"Hey, this was your idea," she replied petulantly. I noticed that her alarm had receded.

Using the hand at her waist, I forced her to sit up further, as she would in the saddle, until she was resting lightly against me. Taking the reins in my free hand, I glanced over her shoulder so I could watch her.

"Take the reins," I said quietly.

She laughed, reaching up to clap a hand over her ear. "Your breath is tickling me."

I ceased to breathe. A shame really, because she smelled rather good today. And not just her blood.

"And that's just creepy," she glanced over her shoulder with a grin.

"Just can't please you, can I?" I responded kissing the tip of her nose.

She rolled her eyes, turning to face ahead. "Okay, now what?"

I leaned forward slightly, surprised to find that the heat of her body seeped warmly through both of our sets of clothing.

"Alright, the problem you're having is, you see how you're holding the reins? Easing back?"

"Well, I don't want her to start running. I'd probably get myself killed," she defended.

I didn't disagree. "Mmhmm. But, here." I release the reins, placing a hand lightly on her knee, just above the leather of her boot. "You're digging in."

There was a moment where I heard her heart cease to function, before redoubling its efforts. I frowned.

"Am I?" she asked quietly, her gaze straying to where my hand stood out palely against the dark fabric of her riding pants.

I nodded. "Yep. Mixed messages. Try to relax, you're more likely to fall as tensed up as you are." I tugged at her knee lightly, pulling it away from the horse's side.

Her lungs were the next part of her to fail. I listened as the breath faltered in her throat, exiting only shallowly several seconds later.

Hm. She was either incredibly terrified of this six foot drop, or something was going on.

"Bella?" I murmured near her ear, not wanting to startle her.

"Yes?" she breathed in response.

"Are you alright?"

She only nodded mutely.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Jasper, I'm fine!" she snapped quietly, surprising me. I frowned, casting the net of my ability out to capture her feelings. Contentment, irritation and embarrassment battled for dominance, tinged lightly around the edges with something dark that I couldn't name. The jumbled mess was so far beyond my comprehension that I suddenly wished that Edward was around.

"Alright then," I said neutrally, taking up the reins and sending the horse into a slow walk.

We'd circled the paddock twice before she spoke.

"Hey, sorry about that." She shook her head lightly, sending a fruity, citrus smell wafting up from her hair. I leaned in and breathed lightly.

"Don't worry about it," I replied, meaning it.

"I have something to ask you," she said quietly. She'd begun to relax, her body shifting slightly from side to side, matching the natural rhythm of the horse. I nudged the animal's sides lightly, sending it into a mild trot.

"Alright."

"Promise you'll answer me truthfully?" she asked.

I glanced at the side of her face. She was staring ahead resolutely.

There was no way this could be good.

I struggled to answer in the affirmative while still giving myself a way out.

"I'll answer as truthfully as I'm able," I finally went with. Apparently that was good enough for her.

"Okay. You remember the other night? When we were talking?" I hoped she was going to clarify, because we'd done a lot of talking in the past. She took a deep fortifying breath, and I felt a slight transmission of nervousness. I instantly provided a low pulse of calm.

"Which night?" I questioned.

"You know, when you came into my room and asked me about Edward?" She fidgeted slightly. "And you?"

I blinked, recollection of the night in question in the forefront of my mind within a second.

"Yes," I answered hesitantly.

"Well, I've been thinking about that a little bit, and I was just wondering. Why did you ask me about that?"

Oh. I hadn't even thought of the possible ramifications of my little interrogation. What did she _think_ I'd meant by that?

She tipped her head back slightly, and I realized that I was no longer teaching her, but just taking her for a ride. She seemed so relaxed I didn't have the heart to tell her as much.

"I was just curious." It was true, at least. Really, I wanted to know how she felt about Edward, before Edward had the chance to inundate her with his professions of love.

Not something I could tell her.

"What even made you think of it?" she pressed.

Now this was definitely something I knew she didn't want to talk about. My arm around her waist tightened slightly. "You know why."

I could feel the heat of her blush as she turned her head slightly.

"That's all?"

I nodded, staring ahead at the densely wooded area surrounding the stables.

"Jasper?" she questioned tentatively.

"Mhm?"

"What do you think about _me_?"

To say the words came as a shock would be such an understatement as to almost be a crime.

I blinked several times, trying to wrap my head around it.

The most eloquent response I could provide was, "What?"

I could feel her slender shoulders shaking lightly against my chest, and assumed she must be laughing.

Brat.

"You know, how do you see me? Sister, friend, acquaintance, roommate…other?"

She threw my words back in my face verbatim, and I grimaced. Brat, indeed.

Still, I'd asked the same of her, it was really only fair.

There was a single word on the tip of my tongue almost immediately. Sister. Bella was a cherished part of my family, in the role of little sister. But I paused, before the answer could escape.

I'd promised to answer her as truthfully as possible, and to my surprise, I had to stop and evaluate if sister was correct. Did I just see her as a little sister? Could the emotions I felt for her be applied strictly to that role?

I hated that Edward was in love with her, but I knew for certain that Emmett saw our Bella as nothing more than a sister and he was going to hate it as well. My hatred, however, was tinged slightly with something I could only assume was jealousy. Jealous…of what? I didn't know.

I loved her, of course, but I didn't believe that I was 'in love' with her. I adored her, I was fiercely protective of her. But, again, all traits and feelings that could be applied to Emmett as well.

Did I see her as a man sees a woman? No…Well, today I had noticed how the fabric of her pants clung lightly to curves that had definitely not been there before, but I think I could pass that off as simple curiosity at her sudden arrival into adulthood.

I felt safe in the truth department when I replied, "As a sister of course."

"Of course," she replied, a hint of something solemn in her tone.

Did…she want me to see her as something more than that? I frowned. That couldn't be right. I was probably just reading too much into it.

"So, school starts next Monday," she said suddenly, changing the topic so abruptly that I found myself mentally scrambling to catch up.

"So it does," I agreed. I knew all too well how she felt on the subject of school, so I was mildly surprised that she'd even brought it up.

"Excited?" she asked.

I laughed. "Oh yeah, only done this about ten times now."

She grinned. "Maybe I'll wait to ask Carlisle to change me until I'm old enough looking that I won't have to attend any more."

"As if you could wait," I scoffed.

Unlike Edward and Rosalie, this topic wasn't one that bothered me. Bella was well informed, and when the time came for her to make her decision, she would make that which was best for her.

Honestly, I'd be a little relieved when we didn't have to worry so much about her physical well-being.

"You're right," she conceded.

"On the subject of school," I segued, not intending to stick to the topic at all. "You know, they don't allow horses."

She turned her head slightly, blinking at me. "That's rather random."

"Oh, just saying, since this is the only form of travel you've mastered, even above that of walking, you might want to start working on getting that license, since they won't let you ride to school."

She groaned, her head lolling back against my chest.

"Please don't bring this up," she begged. "Edward or Alice can take me. They're going to the same place and we'll save on gas."

"Don't you want to at last try to learn to drive, Bella?" I prompted.

She shook her head adamantly. "I _did_ try. Remember? Me, you, Rose and Edward? Do you recall how that went?!"

I couldn't help but laugh at the memory. Oh, I did remember how that went. Not well.

"Alice or I could teach you," I offered.

I slowed the horse as we reached the stables, sliding down and reaching up to pull Bella down as well. I steadied her as she regained her land-legs.

"I really don't want to."

"Just promise me that you'll think about it," I cajoled, picking up the reins and leading Hermione toward the stable. I'd expected a ready agreement, simply so I'd drop the matter, but it appeared none was forthcoming. I wasn't anticipating her next line.

"Jasper? I…I'm not feeling so well," her voice had taken on a rather feeble tone and I rolled my eyes. She had to be the world's worst liar.

"Bella, you're not getting out of this _that_ easily," I declared, turning to her with a grin. She was leaning against one of the fence posts, suddenly looking quite pale.

Perhaps she wasn't lying.

"No, Jasper, really, I feel sick."

I rushed to her side, trying to figure out what could have possibly happened to her within the past few minutes.

"What's wrong?" I demanded, eyes flying over her as I searched for visible injury.

Her heart was racing, beating a heavy, wild tattoo in her chest. Her breathing was short, shallow and labored, but I could detect nothing from her outward appearance.

"I…I don't know," she breathed, laying a trembling hand to her chest. "I just feel really dizzy. And warm. Is it warm out here to you? No, I suppose it wouldn't. It feels so warm. I gotta get out of this…" her rambling trailed off as she struggled with the zipper on her vest, and I reached in to slide the small metal closure down. Frowning I realized that the heat she exuded seemed to have risen.

She shrugged out of the offending piece of clothing, letting it drop to the ground.

"Maybe you need to sit down for a few moments?" I suggested, feeling entirely useless. Should I give her a couple of seconds, or race her straight to Carlisle?

She slid down the fence with a nod.

My rising panic sky-rocketed as she kept right on going, slumping until she was laying on the ground.

"Bella!" I called, sliding to my knees at her side. I felt for her emotional signature and came back empty.

I tore my cell phone out of my pocket, flipping it open and pressing the number five. Carlisle's calm voice answered almost immediately.

"Carlisle!" I all but shouted.

"Jasper?"

"Something's wrong with Bella! We were horse back riding, and she said she was feeling dizzy, and now it looks like, maybe she's fainted. I don't know."

"Calm down, son. Is she breathing?"

"Yes," I answered instantly, ears pricking with the bare thread of the sound.

"Did she fall at all today? From the horse or otherwise?"

"No."

"Hmmm," he sounded perplexed.

"Can I bring her home? Will I hurt her?"

"If she hasn't fallen at all, you should be fine. Bring her home."

I snapped the phone shut and forced it into my pocket so roughly that I tore the small bit of fabric right through. Growling lowly, I tucked it more carefully into the other.

"Bella?" I said softly, as I leaned in to gather her into my arms. "Can you hear me?"

She made a small noise that I could only assume was confirmation.

"I'll get you home in just a second. Hang on."

As I cradled her close to my chest, I couldn't help but be struck with an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. Why… She shifted lightly, pressing her cheek against the fabric of my shirt, and I snarled.

She was burning up.

Just like last week, when we'd found her slumped on the forest floor. But the sun wasn't even out today, dammit! What was this?

I ran as quickly as I dared with her in my arms, my mind working furiously the whole way.

* * *

"What the hell did you do to her?!"

The words registered just before a strong hand closed around my throat and slammed me into the wall. I could only stare at Emmett, astonished, as his anger rolled over me in hostile waves.

"Jesus, Emmett, I didn't do anything!"

"He's telling the truth," Edward intoned coolly. Considering the fact that he sounded as though he barely meant it, his defense was probably more for Esme's sake than mine.

Emmett released me reluctantly, grumbling all the while and I slid down the wall with a sigh.

Carlisle was with Bella as we spoke, had been in her room for near thirty minutes now, and had yet to give us any news.

Esme, Alice and Rose were on their way back from a hunt, as I'd called them as soon as we'd gotten in the door.

Edward sat on the thin ledge of railing that overlooked the living room. He was doing what he did best. Brooding.

Emmett was like a caged lion. Stalking into Bella's room furiously, snarling as he was forced back out by Carlisle.

I didn't know what to do with myself, and so I sat, silent, swamped by the almost tangible coalescence of worry that the three of us were emitting.

We suffered for ten more minutes before Carlisle finally made an appearance.

"I don't know what's wrong with her," he declared, shocking all of us into silence.

Carlisle didn't know what was wrong with her? That had to be a first. He'd been practicing medicine for hundreds of years. How could he not know what was wrong? Emmett looked as though he were about to demand that very knowledge.

"Actually, I take that back. Medically, I can _find_ nothing wrong with her. She has similar symptoms to her bout of heat stroke last week, but as Jasper advised, it was overcast and barely sixty five today, plus Bella wasn't engaged in any taxing activities." He was frowning, massaging the back of his neck. "I just can't figure it out."

"What do we do to help her? Stick her in a bath?" Edward asked, suddenly glancing at me with a frown.

"No, her temperature isn't high enough for that, I don't want to risk shock, but we should definitely attempt to bring her fever down. It's difficult when she's not conscious." His mumbling seemed more for himself than any of us. "Actually," he suddenly declared, "One of you could go in and lay beside her while I continue researching the possible causes of this." He was already walking away, still speaking quietly to himself.

I guess his thought process on this was we were not only cool, but able to leach the heat from her body. Of course that really only left one question. Which of us…

We stared at each other for several seconds, each silently daring one of the others to move first.

Edward was, of course, out of the question, considering his feelings for her. Emmett was an alright choice, but he was so damned overprotective that he'd probably tear Carlisle's head off when he came in to check on her. Besides, I'd promised her that I'd be there to help her.

"I'm doing it," Emmett growled.

"Like Hell," Edward argued. Did he really think I'd let him in there, all things considered?

"Well, we can stand around and argue like children," I said patiently, "Or one of us can get in there and help her."

"Rock, Paper, Scissors," Emmett declared.

I rolled my eyes. Seriously? "Edward can read minds, Emmett."

Edward looked pretty pissed that I'd ruined it for him.

"I can keep my mind clear for a few seconds, can't you Jasper?" Emmett taunted.

Scowling, I stepped up, silently reciting the names of the states in backwards alphabetical order.

"One," Edward said sullenly.

"Two," Emmett growled.

"Three," I stated calmly.

Laying my hand out, I glanced the three of them over swiftly.

* * *

**There you have it! Now a question for you.**

**Just _who_ should win this little game of rock, paper, scissors? Let me know in a review and I'll write the next chapter based on your answers!**


	8. Interlude: Paper Beats Rock

**A/N: Well, obviously Jasper is the clear winner of the rps contest!**

**This is a mini-chapter from Edward's point of view.**

**Trust me, I'll make you like him again. Don't doubt me!**

**And again, I can't thank those of you that read and review my chapters enough. I love you guys!**

* * *

Calefaction

Interlude 2

Paper Beats Rock

_Louisiana, Kentucky, Kansas..._

_Rosalie in a bikini...._

_Iowa, Indiana, Illinois..._

_Alice in a bikini..._

_Idaho, Hawaii, Georgia..._

_Carlisle in a bikini..._

I grimaced, nearly withdrawing from Emmett's mind at this last vivid image. The impression was so detailed that I briefly wondered if this was the first time Emmett had imagined such things. The temptation to taunt him was great, but considering the gravity of our current situation, I refrained.

I wondered if the two of them actually believed they'd be able to bypass my ability. Regardless of how occupied they kept their minds until then, there would still be a moment, however brief, where they'd have to decide which of the three objects of the game they'd choose.

_Florida,_ _Delaware, Connecticut..._

_Get out of my head Edward..._ Emmett's mental voice warned just before a truly horrifying tableau played out. _Jasper in a Speedo...feeding bikini clad Carlisle grapes...while I, in a loincloth play errand boy and fan them with a...rock..._

I frowned briefly. Aside from the ridiculous impossibility of the situation, it seemed particularly peculiar that I would be fanning them with a… Oh!

Ha!

_Colorado, California, Rock..._

It was one of the harder things I'd had to do, restraining my smile.

Our hands landed at precisely the same moment, rock, rock, and paper.

"Dammit Edward!" Emmett exploded. "You are such a cheater!"

Jasper shook his head, chuckling mirthlessly before uttering bitterly, "I told you, Emmett."

I watched Jasper intently for a moment, wondering where along the way our friendship had diminished so severely as to barely exist. Certainly as Bella grew and we each took to teaching her our own preferred pastimes, we'd begun to drift apart, but when had the valley become such a chasm?

I could admit that my unfounded accusations had probably helped add quite a bit of distance.

Had I apologized for that?

I only wished that my agonizingly accurate memory would cloud things up a bit rather than thrust the glaring realization all too abruptly into my conscience.

I hadn't, of course.

Perhaps now was the time to do so. Perhaps it would be best for all if Jasper were to go ease Bella's discomfort. I had a feeling that I would only add to it.

Though more than a week had passed, and I had done my best to keep my distance, Bella had yet to actively seek my company. Esme had echoed Jasper's initial sentiment, had advised that I needed to allow for some time, and rationally, I could see the truth of her words. What I had done was unthinkable, inexcusable, and unforgivable. But the distraught, sophistic portion of my brain, which had been playing a rather large role as of recent, was demanding immediate resolution.

To have Bella look at me as though I were something born of her nightmares was unendurable, regardless of whether or not I knew it was justified.

Still, awakening me with beside her would no doubt cause a bout of panic, and that was the last thing I wanted for the beautiful young woman that I loved.

My lips parted as I decided that there was no time like the present for reconciliation, when Jasper's mental voice cut harshly through my mind.

_You will not enter that room, do you understand me? If you take so much as a single step toward it, I'll tell Emmett your feelings for Bella._

For a single moment, all emotion, all thought drained away, and I stood in stunned silence. Quick in the wake of my stupor came anger, my good will washed away in the tidal wave of my fury. I set a level glare upon my brother.

"Excuse me?"

_I know that you heard me. I won't repeat myself._

My fists clenched furiously, while Jasper had the audacity to smile smugly at me. I could hear Emmett's thoughts, reflecting confusion as he attempted to keep track of this one sided conversation.

It shouldn't have mattered, considering I was going to ask Jasper to do the task anyway, but the means he had employed to ensure his desired end…the betrayal stung. We weren't in the best of graces, no, but this was not something I thought he would ever attempt to use against me.

_Tell Emmett you think that I should go in. Make it believable._

My teeth ground together as my pride roared a furious denial.

Perhaps I should just tell Emmett. Remove this obstacle immediately, before Jasper's manipulations got out of hand.

But no. I hadn't even spoken the words aloud to Bella as of yet, I was not about to tell Emmett and have him destroy any possible hope I may have.

If looks could kill, Jasper would've quite likely dropped dead. I stared at him threateningly as I forced the words out.

"You know, Emmett, I think that perhaps Jasper should be the one to assist Carlisle with Bella's illness." I could read from his thoughts that he was about to protest, and I quickly cut him off. "He was the last one she saw before she passed out, it would probably ease her return to consciousness if Jasper is the first she sees when waking. Plus, he does have the ability to calm her if she grows restless. And we all just want what's best for her, don't we?"

Though he grumbled beneath his breath, Emmett could not deny the logic of my words.

_Not bad._

I'd never wanted to inflict physical pain on anyone as much as I wanted to hurt Jasper right then.

As he stepped toward Bella's door, I placed a light, restraining hand on his arm.

"Jasper?"

He looked at me cautiously. Perhaps he knew that the underhanded method he'd used had crossed the line.

"You realize, of course, that this weapon will be at your disposal for only a short period of time?"

The corner of his mouth twitched upward briefly, and he nodded acceptingly.

I released my hold on him, taking a deep, calming breath as I heard Bella's bedroom door click.

"What the hell was that?" Emmett demanded quietly.

I frowned, shaking my head. "You'll know soon enough."

He glowered, snarling, before turning heel and stalking away. I heard the door to he and Rose's room slam shut.

I foolishly thought that I would be able to control myself in light of the decision to allow Jasper to aid Bella, most likely because the realization of what he would be doing hadn't fully hit home.

I turned toward the stairs, thinking that I would, perhaps, go play the piano for a while, or read in Carlisle's study, when a quiet, yet utterly unmistakable noise reached my ears. The soft creak of the bed springs as they endured Jasper's additional weight.

That was all it took, really. A tiny, inconsequential sound.

The jealous rage that had calmed from a blaze to a simple smolder suddenly burst back to life. The demon that slept within stirred at the primordial emotion, and a low, sustained growl rumbled in the back of my throat. Without realization of my intent, I turned toward the bedroom. Something within, something dark, demanding that I lay claim to what was mine.

I managed to stop myself as I reached for the gleaming doorknob.

No. This wasn't right.

Despite my age, I was far from a caveman, though my recent behavior certainly wouldn't have led anyone to believe that.

Bella was a person, not property to be owned.

She was ill, and Jasper was assisting her. I would just have to deal with it.

Taking a swift, running leap, I bounded down the stairs.

I didn't, however, have to stay and bear witness.

I was out the door within seconds, racing across the back yard. My feet ate up the ground, and I closed my eyes briefly as I moved through the open space, letting the familiar evening sounds and scents wash over me.

I ran.

Perhaps for minutes, perhaps hours. It didn't matter.

I sped through the woods, trees passing as little more than dark, looming blurs. Birds called quietly, songs of impending twilight, lullabies perhaps. The cloud cover had broken long enough to allow the sun a brief, brilliant moment in the spotlight. It sat in understated magnificence on the horizon, crimson, bleeding into the rainbow hued sky.

It reminded me of Bella.

Utterly beautiful.

Unique. Devastating. Wholly brilliant.

I sprang into the nearest tree, climbing swiftly to the top, to better see the carmine orb fade.

Inevitably my thoughts returned to Bella.

I'd known her for the entirety of her existence, which, in reality hadn't been any great length of time, and if you'd asked me, during the sixteen years prior to this if I ever thought I'd have fallen in love with the mortal Isabella Cullen, I'd probably have laughed. I can honestly say that I would never have predicted such a thing to occur. In my mind, Bella was never to be on the receiving end of romantic love.

Not because I didn't think she was capable of attracting a mate. She was just…Bella. The youngest, infinitely fragile Cullen.

Perhaps because we, ourselves, didn't age, we'd begun to think of Bella in the same light. In some of our minds, Emmett's especially, Bella had become trapped in a state of perpetual stasis. Forever the five year old child who had managed to make Jasper and myself realize the idiocy of our self-imposed exile.

Recently, we'd had to face a realization that some were ill-prepared to, and others refused to acknowledge.

Bella was growing up.

Long gone were the curly pig-tails and frilled shoes. No more sticky little hands or high pitched giggles.

In their place was a subtle beauty that would've left me breathless if breathing were still a necessity.

Her hair had changed very little since she was a child, hanging in loose mahogany curls that reminded me of silk, spun into fine strands. Her skin was like the fairest ivory, smooth and soft. Expressive chocolate eyes sat innocently in her fine-boned face, and her lips, well, her soft, coral lips had given me thoughts I hadn't realized I was capable of creating. Her jaw was stubborn, a hint that perhaps not all physical attributes were genetic, as that was a well known trait amongst us Cullens. The graceful column of her neck flowed gently into impossibly small shoulders, slender but strong arms, and delicate hands. Her breasts…well I hadn't allowed myself to think of them, really, though there had been some definitive changes there. The slight indent marking her waist swelled ever so slightly where her hips began, and her legs, despite having attempted to kill her so often, were lovely. Her feet were tiny, completely adorable, just like the rest of her.

It was hard to believe that seventeen years had already passed. Only one more and Carlisle would allow her to make her life altering decision.

I already knew the answer she had chosen, and hated it. On this, perhaps for the first time, Rosalie and I were in complete accordance, seeing perfectly eye to eye.

The argument was long since tired, repeated over and over through the years, with the same result each and every time.

We argued that Bella should live her life.

Bella returned fire that we _were_ her life.

Sighing raggedly, I raked a hand through my hair. It was no use dwelling on such subjects. There would be enough angst to go around when the day in question actually occurred.

For now, she was the sweet, living, _human_ member of our family.

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts, that the sound of my name being called quietly from below set me immediately on edge.

"Edward?"

Startled anxiety gave way to neutral acceptance as recognition of the voice hit me.

Carlisle.

"Up here, Carlisle," I answered.

He was beside me before I had time to contemplate if it was rude not to hop down to meet him.

"Lovely evening," he said cordially.

I glanced at him from the corner of my eye, smiling faintly.

"You came all this way to remark on the weather?"

He chuckled, looking at me then.

"I suppose not."

"No."

"I wanted to ensure that you were alright." He paused briefly, continuing only after examining my confusion expression. "After everything that has occurred recently. I know that you blame yourself…"

"I almost killed her, Carlisle!" I shouted, all of the pent up fury and frustration releasing itself in that single statement. I could still recall every moment of the terrifying incident, and I hated myself for it.

I'd almost killed her.

An image of Bella, lifeless and cold swam sickeningly before my vision. I never would have been able to live with myself if anything had happened to her.

"Mmhmm. You almost did," he agreed, not offering me pity or sympathy. For that, I was almost glad. "And you've got to come to terms with it, as the rest of us have."

Groaning, I hung my head in my hands, closing my eyes. Come to terms with almost killing the woman I claimed to love. Easier said than done, I assure you.

"She hates me."

Carlisle laughed softly, reaching over to pat my back lightly.

"You know that's not true, Edward."

"At the very least she's terrified of me."

I wanted him to deny that as well, but we'd both know he was lying if he did.

"You have to understand, for all that she knows what we are, she really had no idea." I began to protest, but pondering the notion, decided to let him finish. "We tell her that we're vampires, that we drink the blood of animals for survival, and her mind has accepted that. But I don't believe she truly comprehended what we are. The difficulty we face when restraining that part of us, call it your demon, monster, what you will, that demands the life force of humanity for sustenance. To her we are simply her family, perhaps eccentric, but relatively normal. You have shown her that we are dangerous when our baser instincts are called into play."

I sighed my disgust with myself. "I didn't want to be the one to have shown her that. I would have thought that Jasper…"

"Jasper has come a long way, hasn't he? I will agree that of the two of you, I'd have suspected Jasper to have gone after Bella when he scented her blood. It's rather odd…"

I frowned and kept my lips closed on the subject. Carlisle no doubt had a theory on this, but was awaiting me to question him on it. He would be waiting a while.

"Any thoughts on why that might be?" He was relentless.

I shrugged casually, picking at a stray thread on the hem of my shirt.

"Why did you attack Jasper?"

I shifted uneasily. Not a subject I was eager go touch on.

"You know why," I mumbled.

"Bella's thoughts, right. Why would you jump to such a drastic conclusion, though, Edward? You're normally quite level-headed."

The final rays of the fading sunlight disappeared entirely, and I glanced at Carlisle in the growing darkness.

"I suppose I just wasn't thinking straight," I answered lamely.

"Hm."

I wasn't about to offer any further information. I wasn't so desperate as to have deluded myself into believing Bella returned even a sliver of the emotion I felt for her, and the last thing I wanted was for my family to find out and possible divulge my awkward secret.

"How's she doing?" I asked.

"As well as can be. I believe she and Jasper were cooking something that I hardly approved of when I left."

I tried to banish the thought of the two of them in the kitchen together. At least Jasper was an absolutely wretched cook. "Do you have any idea what's wrong with her?"

"Not a single clue. Unless she's been to the rainforest recently without telling any of us."

We both chuckled at that, a poor mask for the concern we felt.

"She'll be alright though?"

Sighing heavily, he glanced up into the sky.

"I hope so."

Several minutes of companionable silence elapsed before he spoke again. "Edward?"

"Mm?"

"If Bella's illness is something grave, would you agree to my changing her? If it meant saving her?"

The answer was instant, both surprising and irritating me as it left my lips without any thought. The motivation behind it purely selfish.

"Yes."

He nodded gravely.

I was such a hypocrite.

* * *

**A/N: Continue on for some Jasper Bella cuddle time!**


	9. Rock Blackmails Paper

**A/N: I suffered some serious writer's block on this one. Hope it meets your approval!**

**Jasper PoV**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 7

Rock Blackmails Paper

Shit.

I stared down at the three of our hands, Emmet's and my own fisted, Edward's lying flat.

Dammit. I knew there was no way we'd be able to pull it off. Emmett and his bright ideas. I shook my head, laughing lightly, though the sound held no humor. "I told you, Emmett."

He looked at me helplessly, as if the idea that this might have happened was entirely unfathomable to him.

Ugh, why had I even agreed to this nonsense? When it came right down to it, regardless of who the 'winner' may be, it was not a good idea for Edward to go into that room. Was he so selfish that he refused to acknowledge that? Not only was it inappropriate, considering his feelings for Bella, there was no way in hell she was going to be happy waking up to his presence. Painful as it might be for him to face, Bella needed some time and space after what he'd done.

But what could I possibly do to prevent him? Emmett was no use, considering himself the only appropriate protector for the mortal Cullen.

Short of physically having it out with Edward, I had no leverage.

The thought gave me pause. Now that wasn't entirely true. I had, perhaps, the greatest leverage of all, but to use it in such a fashion would be unacceptable.

Wouldn't it?

I was thinking the words before I'd even realized I'd planned to hone them into a fine edged blade.

_You will not enter that room, do you understand me? If you take so much as a single step toward it, I'll tell Emmett your feelings for Bella._

It was a low blow, even I would admit to that, but what other choice was he leaving me?

He watched me, calculation glittering in his savage gaze. The dark pulse of anger that rolled off him didn't surprise me in the least. If our situations were reversed, I'd have felt at least what he was sending my way now. I acknowledged the underlying edge of hurt at my betrayal with disgust for myself, but I hid it away in the back of my mind. It was obvious that Edward and I were going to have to talk, and soon.

As though he hadn't heard my unspoken words, he murmured dangerously, "Excuse me?"

Emmett looked as though he wanted to shake the both of us. I knew that it irritated him to no end for us to communicate this way.

_I know that you heard me. I won't repeat myself, _I thought callously.

With his prolonged silence came the relief of my victory. Despite my better intentions, I smiled rather slyly.

We stood in silence, a muscle in Edward's jaw ticking as he ground his teeth together.

_Tell Emmett you think that I should go in. Make it believable._

His fury rose, a tsunami of aggressive emotion that washed over me. I didn't bother attempting to calm him. He was too far gone for that.

He glared daggers in my direction as he forced himself to speak the words I'd requested.

"You know, Emmett, I think that perhaps Jasper should be the one to assist Carlisle with Bella's illness. He was the last one she saw before she passed out, it would probably ease her return to consciousness if Jasper is the first she sees when waking. Plus, he does have the ability to calm her if she grows restless. And we all just want what's best for her, don't we?"

That was better than I been hoping for, considering his state of mind.

_Not bad._

He looked as though he wanted to haul off and punch me square in the nose. Honestly, I wouldn't have blamed him.

But he didn't. He was working on that whole self-control thing.

Now was not the time to tell him so, but I empathized with him on that point.

I took a step toward Bella's closed door, my ears immediately tuning in to the hushed whisper of her breathing, the steady, dull thudding of her heart.

"Jasper?" I was mildly surprised when Edward's hand closed over my arm. I glanced down at the offending appendage, before tentatively meeting his gaze. Perhaps I felt a minute fraction of shame for the way I'd used his secret for my own gain. I never would have if it hadn't been in Bella's best interest.

"You realize, of course, that this weapon will be at your disposal for only a short period of time?"

I couldn't help the half grin that tugged at my lips. Leave it to Edward to threaten like a gentleman.

I nodded my understanding, and he released me.

I stepped into the dim room with a low sigh, letting the door close with a soft click. The blinds were drawn, casting the area into long, evening shadows. Pale curtains ruffled faintly as the open window allowed a cool breeze to sweep through, offering respite from the stifling warmth that had invaded the space.

My eyes were drawn to the large four poster, lacy monstrosity that took up a good portion of the room. I noticed with some amusement that the frame had been replaced after Emmett's carelessness. And there, in the center of the sunny yellow covers was the girl who had been the center of so much familial drama as of late.

She was very still, the rise and fall of her chest shallow, barely an indication that she was even alive. The passing thought caused something to seize up within me, and for a moment, I felt an irrational surge of panic. Within a fraction of a second I was at her bedside, taking her tiny hand in my own, feeling for her pulse, though I could quite obviously see the small, steady beating just along the edge of her jaw.

My gaze lingered there, briefly, and I examined my reaction to the fact that there was blood; warm, ambrosial human blood, brimming with life, flowing just beneath the thin protective membrane of her skin. I was pleased to find very little change. The insatiable beast stirred briefly, sensed that perhaps this was the one human it could never tempt me to claim, and resumed its slumber. I brushed my thumb faintly along her wrist, dusting the tentative pulse there, smiling to myself.

I was no Carlisle, or even Edward, but I had certainly come a long way.

Feeling slightly ridiculous for my over-reaction, I gently laid her hand back on the bed. She didn't so much as stir.

I stepped back, something akin to nervousness rippling through me. Should I just…get into bed with her then…or…?

It was laughable. A one hundred and fifty year old vampire worried about the decorum of lying in bed with a human. And yet, I was.

Walking to the other side, I tugged the checkered comforter back slightly, watching Bella for any sign that she may be rousing. She lay quietly.

The mattress protested as I hesitantly added my weight to its burden. I sat there for several seconds, trying to figure out what the hell I could possibly be so anxious about. Any answer that may have been present was certainly elusive, and I quickly gave up on trying to catch it.

I laid back slowly, staring at the bright, airy canopy above. I very much doubted that this was what Carlisle had in mind, one of us lying beneath her covers, separated from her by several feet, but I was having difficulty bringing myself to do much else. Should I put my arms around her…or lean closer…this was definitely new territory for me.

The decision was made for me as the enterprising Ms. Cullen, even in her unconscious state, seemed to sense that relief from the heat that plagued her was close at hand. Without so much as a moment's notice, Bella had rolled toward me, throwing a slender, flushed arm across my torso and nuzzling the warmth of her cheek against my shoulder.

I expected to feel awkward, perhaps even uncomfortable. Both remained conspicuously absent.

What I hadn't anticipated was my body's immediate reaction. My arms wrapped around her, gathering the warmth of her tiny frame against mine. I found my hands moving of their own accord; the left tracing the gentle bumps marking her spine, while the right eased over her arm, seeking to soothe the discomfort of her elevated temperature. She sighed, a quiet pleasant sound, and pushed closer to my side. Smiling faintly, I toyed with the ends of her hair. She fit against me neatly; the infinitely fragile piece to this strange two person puzzle.

I glanced down at her face. She looked rather pretty, with the dark fringe of her lashes resting against the light blush on her cheeks. Her lips were parted slightly on her breaking breath, and I felt each soft exhalation through the thin material of my shirt as surely as if she'd touched me. I reached in, tucking a stray curl behind her ear, and she tipped her head lightly, pressing into my hand. The backs of my knuckles stroked her flushed face, and I chuckled quietly as she uttered a small mewl of contentment.

I knew that I probably shouldn't be enjoying this, shouldn't feel this quiet sense of peace, but in that moment, I couldn't particularly bring myself to care. Didn't human families show one another that they cared with physical displays of affection? Why not a vampire/human family mix? (We'll conveniently leave out the minimal chance of death and dismemberment here) It wasn't as though I'd done anything inappropriate.

I briefly wondered why the thought sounded like an argument.

Bella shifted beside me, and I absently ran my hand over her back soothingly.

Her fingers suddenly fisted in my shirt and she made a tiny, breathless noise that sounded suspiciously like my name.

Was she having a nightmare? Should I wake her?

I opened myself up to her emotions, frowning as a discordant wave of something complex rolled over me. Fear was present, certainly, but there was excitement, dissatisfaction, and an underlying darkness that I hadn't realized she was capable of.

She jerked away from me, a fitful little toss, and began to kick at the covers. Her head moved from side to side, her hair becoming a dark halo against the pale fabric of the pillows as slender fingers curled convulsively into the sheets. Her chest rose and fell shallowly while her heart raced wildly.

Only Edward could've looked at her just then and not suspected at least some of what was going on in her sleeping mind. How he'd remained so naïve over the course of eighty years was beyond me.

"Jasper," Bella suddenly breathed, and I was pulled from my jaded musings.

Assisting in her recovery? Okay. Holding her? Sure. Listening to her dream about me in such a manner? Slightly awkward.

I rested my hand on her shoulder, fully intending to wake her, when realization of the heat she was emitting shocked the thoughts right out of me.

Jesus, she was definitely not cooler for having had me lay beside her.

I reached down, tugging the bedcovers back and away from her. Her clothing was especially feminine; a pair of pink sleeping shorts with wide eyed pandas and rainbows on them, and a matching sleeveless shirt. Normally I'd have scoffed at the ridiculously over the top set, but I found my lips quirking in amusement as I decided that it was perhaps slightly adorable.

I couldn't have possibly expected what happened next. Trapped, as it had been, beneath the sweltering warmth of the bedclothes, her scent hit me all at once; the slightly citrus heat of her skin, the bittersweet temptation of her blood, and the undeniably dark undercurrent of her arousal. Panic promptly ensued as for the first time in more than ten years, Bella caused venom to flood my mouth.

_You don't need to breathe, you moron, _a quiet, logical voice in the back of my mind stated quite calmly.

I heeded the practical advice, halting the breath in my lungs. I silently wished that it were so easy to rid myself of the memory. Her scent, just then, had been the most enticing thing I'd ever smelled in my entire hundred and fifty years.

I was mildly horrified with myself for all of five seconds, before I realized that despite the venom, I hadn't wanted to bite her. The physical response had been a base result of the triptych of temptation she'd unwittingly offered, something I couldn't have stopped even if I'd tried, but it hadn't crossed my mind even once that I should drink from her. She just smelled very, very good.

Hesitantly, in light of this revelation, I exhaled, pausing for just a moment to collect my self-control, before taking a slow breath in.

As several seconds had passed since I'd revealed her to the cool air of the room, the extreme concentration of her scent seemed to have dissipated at least somewhat. But it was still there. I closed my eyes, the familiar, sweetly tart almost grapefruit scent of the body products she used registering, heightened by the elevated temperature of her skin. Her blood as well, something I hadn't allowed myself to think of since she'd become a part of our family, seemed to be brought into sharp relief with her rising heat. And finally…I sighed as the primal third element washed over me. Combined, the three created something I had no description for.

Another bout of venom followed my examination, and I likened it to our 'vegetarian' metaphor. Were a vegetarian to smell a particularly tasty cut of meat, prepared by a master chef, isn't it possible that they could enjoy the scent without ever once wanting to partake of it?

Wait.

Did I just compare Bella to a steak?

I frowned, shaking my head to clear it of the odd, inappropriate thoughts.

Still, she tossed and turned, and I couldn't be sure if it were the heat or her own mind causing her discomfort.

I debated going to find Carlisle, but something stopped me. I had promised her that I would help her whenever it were possible for me to do so, and I certainly had the ability to help with at least one of her issues.

She was on her own with the dreams that plagued her, but…

Reaching out, I wrapped an arm around her waist, giving a small tug. Her back came to rest against the cool marble of my chest. I immediately dismissed the realization that she was cradled rather intimately between my hips. Definitely not brother appropriate thoughts, there.

Resting my chin lightly atop her head, I tucked her close, my cold fingers tracing lightly over her arms. I breathed the sweet scent of her hair, closing my eyes.

Minutes ticked by and she began to quiet, much to my relief. The warmth she emanated began to recede, and eventually she gave a soft shiver that had me pulling the comforter back up and over us.

I couldn't be certain how much time had passed when she suddenly stiffened in my arms.

A small frown crossed my features as I felt a low pulse of fear from her. Another dream?

But no. Her head began to turn slowly toward me, until her wide eyes met mine over her shoulder. As our gazes locked I could feel the physical relief flow through her as her muscles relaxed.

"Whew," she said quietly.

I offered a lazy smile. "Whew?"

She blushed faintly, ducking her head. "Yeah, I thought you might be Edward."

I chuckled, and she joined in my quiet laughter. "You don't really think I'd let him in here if you weren't comfortable with it, do you?"

She shook her head slightly, rolling onto her back for ease of looking at me. Her eyes mapped my face slowly, before she asked, "Am I dreaming?"

I couldn't help but tease her just a bit. "Were you dreaming of me?" The brilliant crimson that flooded her cheeks was more than enough of an answer, and I took pity on her. "No, you're not dreaming."

She pondered that for a moment, releasing a long, slow exhalation. I curled a strand of her hair around my finger.

"Alright. Then…why are you in my bed?"

Again, I couldn't resist. "Oh, we got married this afternoon, I thought you could use a bit of a rest before the reception."

Her eyes widened to comical proportions for all of a millisecond, before she grinned, rolling her eyes. "Oh yeah? What happened to a spring wedding? Frankly, I'm disappointed." She managed a fairly convincing sigh of chagrin.

"Well, I just couldn't wait."

"Mmhmm. And Emmett approved of this, of course."

I nodded solemnly. "He was my best man."

"Uh-huh."

She stared at me expectantly.

"After our ride this afternoon, you stated that you weren't feeling well. Before I had a chance to get you home, you passed out."

She grimaced. "How embarrassing."

I shrugged. She was human. Humans were susceptible to illness. It was an unfortunate weakness, but a fundamental truth nonetheless. "Carlisle advised that I should bring you home, so I did. Turns out, just like last week, you were running a fever. Not quite as severely, but still elevated beyond a normal range. He can't figure out what it might be."

A deep frown caused a small crease to appear between her brows. I had the sudden urge to soothe the line with my thumb. I resisted.

"That's strange. I mean, for it to appear all of a sudden, and then for Carlisle to be unable to identify it. Also, I have to wonder, why isn't Alice seeing these bouts of illness? Because they're not based on any particular decisions I'm making?" Her confusion swelled to uncomfortable heights and I responded with lulling tranquility.

"All good questions, but none that I'm able to answer, I'm afraid."

She nodded, grinning just a bit. "Though you've still to answer my initial question."

"Ah, yes. I'm in your bed because as you know, we vampires are ectothermic." I thought I saw brief confusion cross her features, so I added, "Unable to produce our own body heat, but able to draw it from our surroundings."

Irritated eyes snapped to mine. "Living with vampires for seventeen years, you really think Carlisle didn't teach me the definition of ectothermic?"

Her anger was quite cute; like a furious kitten.

I decided it best to keep that thought to myself.

"Of course he did." I went for contrite and she nodded. "So, he felt it would be beneficial to have one of us lay beside you, drain a bit of your heat, as well as cool you.

"Good thinking." She chuckled briefly, a neat brow rising slightly. "Though, I have to say I'm surprised that you got past Emmett." If I weren't mistaken, she actually sounded a bit awed.

"Oh, well, I won rock, paper, scissors," I replied matter-of-factly.

She nodded as though that explained everything. "I see."

A low growl interrupted our banter, and I glanced up in surprise, half expecting to see Emmett or Edward crouched in the doorway, prepared to attack. Danger driven instincts caused me to grab the fragile girl lying complacently at my side and push her to the far side of the bed, while I leapt in front of her. She gave a startled little shriek as the force of my hand sent her flying right off the edge of the mattress. I heard the slight thump as she landed, just as my gaze hit the door and found it, surprisingly, still closed up tight.

What…?

The noise sounded again, this time from the other side of the room. I whirled, frowning.

Bella peered over the edge of the mattress, her hair in wild disarray as she sat up. She looked rather irritated. Well, she'd thank me when I saved her from whatever was making that noise, wouldn't she?

"What…are you _doing_?" she demanded.

"Shhh. Did you hear that?" I said quietly, intensely.

It grumbled softly through the room again, and I set my sensitive hearing to finding the exact location of the sound.

It seemed to be coming from…Bella?

"That?" she asked, suddenly sounding quite amused.

"Yes," I answered, staring at her confusedly. I had a feeling this was going to end poorly for me.

"That's my stomach, genius."

Wait, what?

I could only stare at her as she got to her feet, realizing a moment too late that I should've helped her up.

"Yeah, that's my stomach. I haven't eaten since this morning and I'm starving."

No way. That had sounded like, an animal or something. I reached out suddenly, grabbing her around the hips and pulling her toward me. Inevitably, she tripped, but the strength of my hands held her up. I leaned close, resting my ear against her abdomen and waited.

Amusement arose from her in lively waves.

"You don't believe me?" she queried, skeptical bemusement lacing her voice.

"Shh," I commanded.

She complied, standing still for my evaluation.

Sure enough, several seconds later, a gurgly growl erupted from her mid-section. I drew back, assuming a look of feigned horror. "What the hell do you keep in there?"

She patted her the flat expanse of her stomach with a knowing smile. "I'm afraid that a secret."

I released her, shaking my head, feeling only slightly mortified. Over-reaction at its finest, folks.

"Sorry about that. I don't know what came over me."

She laughed indulgently, before reaching over to ruffle my hair. "Don't worry about it. Better watch out though, or you're going to end up as bad as Emmett."

I chuckled, springing out of the bed. "Unlikely." Striding toward the door, I smiled over my shoulder at her, still feeling rather embarrassed for my behavior. "Get dressed and come down and we'll see about getting you something to eat."

That was probably more of a threat than a promise. Cooking was not exactly my forte, but she still managed a sunny grin and a nod for my benefit.

"Oh, Jasper?" she called tentatively as my hand reached for the doorknob.

I glanced back.

"Thanks," she said with a soft smile.

I shook my head, shrugging off her words.

"None necessary."

* * *

"Hey!" Bella suddenly exclaimed from somewhere within the depths of the unnecessarily large pantry. I peered around the corner curiously.

She bounded out of the dimly lit area with a small blue box in hand.

"Look!" she exclaimed, shaking the box in my face. Macaroni and cheese.

I blinked. She was obviously excited by this discovery, but why that might be, I really had no idea. I tried to summon an appropriately enthusiastic smile, which she promptly saw right through.

She sighed in exasperation.

"You don't remember? Emmett let me buy some when we went grocery shopping a couple years ago, and he was banned from taking me ever again?" She laughed fondly and gave the box another little shake. "Of course, I loved it. I wonder who put it in here?"

Emmett took that rather obvious cue and stuck his head around the open pantry door with a grin.

"Hey kiddo, how you feeling?"

She spun to face him with child-like enthusiasm. "Did you do this?" she asked suspiciously, holding the box up.

He shrugged, though the answer was written all over his face. "Maybe there's some kind of fairy for that?"

Bella scoffed, throwing me an amused glance. "A macaroni and cheese fairy?"

Emmett chuckled. "Hey, vampires are real."

"Are they?" she asked, tipping her head to one side.

Emmett nodded sagely, before darting around the partition and wrapping his arms around her. She shrieked with laughter as he lifted and spun her around. I absently wondered if Emmett would ever see her as anything but the child she once was.

I took the diversion to pluck the suspicious box out of her hands, flipping it onto its side to peer at the nutritional contents. Now I'm no expert, but from what I could see, there weren't many.

Bella had come to rest on her own two feet in front of Emmett, arms crossed defensively over her chest. They wore identically mutinous expressions.

"Well," she demanded. "Are you going to take it away from me?"

It was like something out of a bad movie. Pretty, weak girl and her terrifying bodyguard. How I'd been cast as the villain was beyond me.

I shook my head neutrally. "Of course not. Want me to make it for you?"

She and Emmett exchanged a glance, one that easily read 'Yikes, get that away from him if you want it to remain edible', before she quickly divested me of the package.

"No, that's alright. I haven't cooked in a while. You know, you could just heat me up some vegetables or something, to go with it. Some green beans maybe?"

Emmett relinquished his position behind Bella and went to sit at the kitchen island, flipping open the laptop that resided there.

I frowned. "But you hate green beans."

Her lips twitched, and I could tell that she was desperately trying to keep a straight face.

"Hm…"

Oh, she thought I wouldn't be able to so much as heat up a canned vegetable without ruining it? Well, she was going to be pretty horrified when she had to eat the dreaded greens, wasn't she?

She disappeared into the pantry, reappearing shortly with a small can, wearing what I could only describe as a challenging smirk.

Now, it's true. I had ruined any number of dishes I'd attempted to prepare, from the simple to the ridiculously complicated, but this was just insulting.

Dammit, I'd make the best green beans anyone ever had!

I took the can from her hand with a cool smile. She returned the sentiment.

Bella went about her cooking with familiar ease, setting the water to boil, before going to perch on Emmett's knee, the two of them laughing at an amusing video he'd found online.

I frowned at their merry making, before tipping the can on its side to read the instructions.

Hmm. Ingredients: Green beans, water, salt. Calories…Distributed by…where?

I realized suddenly; there weren't any. I looked up to find Bella watching me bemusedly.

Brat.

Well, how difficult could it really be? Open, heat, serve, right?

It took me several minutes to affix the can into the electric can opener, a few attempts to actually get the perversely dull blade to puncture the container, and promptly gave up when pushing the lever only caused the can to drop onto the counter with a thud.

I heard Emmett and Bella's muffled laughter behind me and shot them a glare.

Alright then. Who needed ridiculously inefficient house hold appliances when you had super strength?

I pushed my thumb against the lid, triumphant as the metal squealed and gave, breaking away. With the smell that emanated from the aluminum, I really couldn't blame Bella for disliking this particular vegetable.

"Ha!" I exclaimed, holding the can toward them.

Bella offered mild applause. Emmett was laughing too hard to provide any encouragement.

I scowled, turning to the line of cupboards. A brief search produced a saucepan, and I set it next to the Bella's on the stove. I dumped the smelly contents in, and glanced at the settings.

Low, medium and high. Simple enough.

I wanted it hot, so, high seemed to make the most sense. I quickly turned the knob to the highest setting, stepping away with a little smile, and making my way over to the two of them.

"Better develop a taste for beans quickly, Bella," I warned.

She glanced at the stove, smiled, and shrugged. "We'll see.

We'll see, indeed, I thought sourly.

"Say, where is everyone?" Bella asked suddenly, glancing around.

It was a good question.

"Uh," Emmett glanced up. "Rose, Alice and Esme are up in Vancouver hunting, I think."

"I told them to come back," I interjected.

"Yeah, Carlisle called and let them know that Bella was alright, so I think they were going to finish up before heading back. And Edward…Well he ran off to cry about this or that. Carlisle followed him."

Bella, who'd gone back over to the oven, looked up in surprise.

"What's wrong with Edward?" she asked.

I felt Emmett's eyes on me as he answered. "I dunno. Might wanna ask Jasper."

I glanced down at the granite countertop as though it held the secret meaning to life.

"I'm not sure," I replied as airily as I could manage. "He's just been out of sorts for the last week or so."

Bella frowned thoughtfully and turned back to her pan. I noticed that she glanced into mine, wrinkling her nose.

I wasn't really going to make her eat them, of course; admission that they were perfectly prepared would be good enough.

Fifteen minutes of comfortable silence elapsed as Bella prepared her dinner. She poured bright orange powder into the pan and I grimaced.

"What's that?"

She blinked, glancing up in surprise. "Cheese." The 'of course' was implied.

"Huh. You know, I haven't eaten cheese in a hundred and fifty years, but last I checked…Yeah that's not cheese."

She laughed, stirring the mixture until all of the noodles were coated in the same gaudy color.

"Artificial cheese powder, then," she said, scooping some of the pasta into a bowl. She grabbed a bottled water from the refrigerator before taking the stool next to Emmett. He peered at her bowl curiously.

"Want some?" she asked.

Emmett was certainly the most adventurous of us when it came to trying human food, but even this appeared to be too much for him. He blanched, shaking his head.

"No, thanks."

She began to slowly uncap her water, offering me a sweet smile.

"About those green beans…" she started.

I shook my head firmly. "Oh no, young lady, you're not getting out of eating your vegetables that easily."

She pressed her lips together and shrugged helplessly. "Okay then."

I turned to the stove, glancing into my pan.

Huh.

That's…not what I remembered putting into the pan.

Most, if not all of the liquid that had been in the can had evaporated and the thin green strips, well mostly brown now, lay dry and dead looking in the bottom of the pan.

"Is this what they're supposed to look like?" I questioned.

Bella quickly put her spoon in her mouth, looking far too smug.

Emmett was quick to hop up, vaulting over the island and landing at my side. He glanced skeptically into the pan.

"Yeah…No." He shook his head ruefully.

"What'd I do wrong?" I demanded.

Again, Bella let Emmett do her gloating for her.

"High heat? For over twenty minutes? Did you stir them?" he asked, knowing full well that I hadn't.

I shook my head mutely.

"Yeah, you burned them."

"Ugh," I exclaimed disgustedly, tossing the pan, ruined vegetables and all, into the sink. "Humans should just drink blood."

I sat next to Bella dejectedly. She patted my arm, smiling cheerfully. "Good try."

I scowled.

"Hey Emmett, I'll give you a dollar if you eat one of those green beans," she suddenly, playfully dared.

He looked over in surprise. "A dollar?" He rolled his eyes.

"A thousand," I chimed in.

"Jasper!" Bella gasped. I had a feeling that while Bella knew we were well off, she really had no idea how much money that actually amounted to.

"Five," Emmett countered.

"Thousand?!" Bella squeaked. She seemed perilously close to choking, so I handed the water bottle to her. She took it gratefully.

"Deal," I answered.

Emmett glanced into the sink with a grimace. Reaching in, he plucked one of the shriveled beans from the bottom of the pan, holding it in front of his face for a moment, looking at it with all the disgust he might offer a leper.

"Well," I prompted.

He shot me a look that clearly requested silence.

Taking a quick breath, he put the vegetable in his mouth, chewed quickly, and swallowed it.

I wouldn't have done it for five. Twenty, maybe.

I couldn't have stopped the laughter at the faces he made if my life depended on it. Bella was giggling so hard that she very nearly fell off her stool. I righted her with a hand at the small of her back.

"Gross, Bella. If you have to eat crap like that, I say we just change you now, you poor thing." Before she could take him too literally, something we both knew she was likely to do, he walked over, holding out his hand. "Pay up."

"You know where it is," I chuckled.

Grumbling beneath his breath, he cast an assessing glance between us, before heading out of the room.

The very second his steps faded away, Bella turned to me, a pensive look on her face.

"Jasper? What's wrong with Edward?"

Her voice was low, and I found it amusing that even after all this time she thought that we couldn't hear her, just because we weren't in the room. No doubt, Emmett was listening intently from upstairs, as we spoke.

"I'm not at liberty to say," I answered honestly.

She frowned, pushing the remnants of her dinner around in her bowl.

"But you know?"

"I do," I replied.

"Does it have something to do with me?" she tried.

I'm sure my expression reflected my complaisant exasperation. "Bella."

She huffed. "I know, I know, you're not at liberty to say."

"You have to understand, this past week has been tough on him."

"Well, it hasn't exactly been a walk in the park for me either."

I nodded. "I know that."

She sighed. "I wish I could just trust him again, you know? It would make everything so much easier."

"Bella, you can't force yourself into that position. Just give it a little time. What happened is a very serious matter. I think you're handling it amazingly well, all things considered."

"As do I," a quiet voice murmured from the door.

We both glanced up in surprise. Edward leaned in the archway, a faint smile on his face.

"Hey," I said quietly.

He acknowledged me with a brief nod.

_Still pissed at me?_

He nodded again.

"Hey Edward," Bella said with a smile. It was the first genuinely happy expression she'd had for him in the past week.

"Good evening, Bella. Having something to eat?"

She grinned. "Artificial cheese powder pasta."

He arched a brow. "Sounds delicious, though probably not on the approved list." He shot me a look.

_Yeah, because you'd have been able to deny her._

"Oh, it's not. I forced Jasper to let me make it. I was going to have some vegetables as well, but I let Jasper prepare those."

"Ah, so they were rendered inedible then?"

They exchanged a grin and I frowned.

"Okay, enough about my cooking skills."

"Or lack thereof?" Edward asked innocently. "Actually, I wanted to take Bella to see her belated birthday present, if she's up for it?"

_What? But you got her that c.d. collection and a bunch of books, didn't you? The last big gift was supposed to be from Carlisle and Esme._

He blinked in response.

"What?" Bella's face split into a giddy little grin. "But you already got me something…"

_What did you do?_

Again, he refused to acknowledge my thoughts.

"C'mon!" Edward demanded, and Bella practically bounced off her stool, bounding toward the doorway eagerly. If there was one thing Bella loved, it was presents.

Conversely, she didn't like us to spend much on them. We usually ignored that stipulation.

I had a feeling that her protestations were going to be rather loud when it came to Edward's gift. If he thought that buying her expensive trinkets was going to get him back into her good graces, he was in for an unpleasant surprise.

I followed them at a reluctant pace, suspicion solidifying as we neared the door that led out to the garage.

If Edward had done what I suspected he had, this was going to be good.

* * *

**A/N: Oh, Edward, what have you done? (Actually, I know, I'm just not telling you yet! Mwahahaha!)**


	10. All or Nothing

**A/N: Finally getting Chapter 8 up! It just kept going! I wasn't going to end it where I did, but it was definitely a good place to do so.**

**Thanks so much to everyone that reads and reviews. :D **

**Also, while I love and appreciate my husband/beta very much, he doesn't write fan fic at all, and well...he's a guy. **

**SO: _I'm actively seeking a second beta._ Looking for a female perspective, as well as someone who writes as well as reads fan fic. :)**

**Please send me a PM if you are at all interested.**

**On to the story!**

**You can find images of all automobiles listed in this chapter in my profile. :D**

**Chapter 8 is from Bella's PoV.**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 8

All or Nothing

"Well?" Edward's voice held a subtle hint of anxiety, and more than a touch of excited impatience.

I squinted into the darkness of the garage. Maybe it was something that glowed?

"She can't see it yet, brain trust. Turn on the lights," Jasper drawled quietly behind me. I started slightly as the cool brush of his breath on my ear caused something curious to flutter to life in my stomach.

I _really_ needed to stop dreaming about him.

"Oh, yes, of course," Edward spluttered, reaching over to hit the switch.

I wasn't offended by Edward's lapse of memory in regards to my humanity; it was really kind of nice that he just immediately thought of me as one of them.

I blinked rapidly as the darkness melted away beneath the brilliant fluorescent illumination from above, before casting my eyes around curiously.

Now, when we hadn't progressed past the garage, I have to admit that I'd begun to grow just a little suspicious. If Edward was finishing the replacement of my book collection (my secret hope), or he'd written me some new sheet music, the garage wasn't exactly an ideal place to keep either. In fact the only thing I could think of that would be kept here was...

But certainly he wouldn't have...I mean...No...

Oh.

He had.

I took a deep, calming breath.

"Well?" he asked again.

Regardless of his impatience, Edward was just going to have to wait a few seconds (minutes, hours) for a coherent response from me, because right now, my brain really wasn't capable of formulating much that didn't sound like something an infant might utter.

Jasper's unwavering presence stood at my back. He was close enough that I could feel his chest shaking lightly with laughter. If I didn't know it'd hurt me more than him, I'd have punched him just then.

"Well look at that. Very nice," he remarked lightly, sounding just a touch sarcastic.

Edward glared at him, and there was a brief, silent exchange between the two.

Huh, Emmett was right, that _was_ incredibly annoying.

I'd have suffered any number of non-verbal conversations, however, if it meant that Edward was kept occupied. Unfortunately, he turned a proud smile on me just then, and I couldn't help but smile hesitantly in return. I kept my mind completely and utterly blank.

"What do you think?" he asked.

The appropriate words were stalled somewhere between the frozen cogs in my brain and my lips and I realized I was going to have to wing it.

"It's a...car!" I exclaimed lamely.

He chuckled, leaning in to wrap an arm around my shoulders. I could feel Jasper stiffen slightly behind me, but I was in too much shock to care how close Edward was at the moment.

"A car?" he asked skeptically. "This, my dear, is a Bentley Continental GT convertible in Silver Lake."

His tone implied that those words should mean something to me, but aside from the realization that Bentleys were rather expensive (something I'd only picked up from watching this or that celebrity television show with Emmett), not much else registered.

Don't get me wrong, it was a gorgeous car. I didn't need Rose's fascination with automobiles to recognize its beauty. The pale, baby blue exterior gleamed brilliantly in the overhead lights, and the cream colored seats, most likely leather, absolutely beckoned you to come and sit. It was built with sleek, graceful lines, hinting at both luxury and sport.

It fit right in with the rest of the cars in the massive Cullen garage.

I took a quick, sweeping glance. Rose had forced me to memorize the name of every expensive car in here.

In the corner were Esme and Carlisle's pair of Mercedes. The...S550 and E320...30? Oh, Rose would have a fit. Regardless, in classic black and white, they sat perfectly maintained and unassuming, an accurate reflection of my parents.

As for Alice... Well just like the ridiculous amount of closet space needed by the tiny pixie of the Cullen clan, Alice required an entire row for her choice in cars. Nine VW Beetles were parked, in rainbow order of course, in every manufacturer color available, as well as a convertible in shocking pink, against the far wall. When I'd finally gotten old enough to realize the absolute excess of having so many automobiles and questioned her about it, she'd leveled me with an amused stare and proclaimed, "One to match every outfit, of course."

Of course.

Not to be outdone in terms of sport and speed, however, she could also lay claim to the white, Mercedes Benz McLaren Roadster. Rose absolutely panted over that car, but apparently there was some unspoken rule between the two of them: Don't wear the same outfits, don't drive the same cars; and Alice had made her purchase first. I thought it was rather silly, but hey, what did I know?

Instead Rose had settled on a cherry red BMW Z4. I couldn't think of a better match, really. Beautiful, ostentatious, unattainable...

Looming over the tiny, sleek sports car were the behemoths that comprised Emmett's fuel wasting SUV duo. A slate gray Hummer and a metallic black Escalade. He loved those things like children. I wondered; if it came down to saving me or his Hummer, which he'd choose...

I grinned a little, my eyes gliding to the less flashy, but still obviously affluent choices of the eldest Cullen brothers.

Jasper's BMW M3 perched humbly just to my left. Everything about the car was understated, from the muted dusky exterior to the near silent purr of the undeniably powerful engine, yet it was impossible to ignore. Kinda like its owner.

Of course, for when you wanted to be noticed without question, you could just take a spin on a ridiculously fast, entirely unsafe motorcycle. Not being able to really die or be injured probably helped with that last concern, but you'd never catch me on anything like Jasper's Honda Bluebird or was it Blackbird…I wasn't as familiar with that one.

And finally, Edward's babies. Perhaps he didn't think of them as kin quite like Emmett did, but he was still incredibly protective of them. The silver Jaguar XF was lavish without being overly showy. It was able to get the message of wealth and power across without being quite as in your face as Rose's choice. But the black Porsche 911? Pft. Just about as pretentious as you can get.

I couldn't help but guess that the car choices of my family had quite a lot to say about their personalities.

Which brought my gaze inevitably back to the car that Edward had picked out for me.

The Bentley who's-it-whatchamacallit.

Was this what I would have selected for myself?

I sighed.

Probably not.

I could see Alice in this car, possibly Rose if we switched the color up to red. But I just couldn't envision myself driving something so...extravagant.

I struggled to keep my mind neutral.

"It's gorgeous!" I said softly, shrugging out from under Edward's arm to take a closer look. Was there a gracious way to refuse this gift? I was seriously doubting it.

"It is," Jasper agreed, shadowing me. I glanced over my shoulder at him, silently pleading for help. He simply smirked.

Maybe I should've been nicer to him in the kitchen. Damn it.

"So, Eddie, how much did you drop on this lovely scrap of metal?" Jasper turned to Edward with a lazy smile.

Edward bristled, knowing full well that I shied away from accepting expensive gifts.

Now I have to be honest here. Growing up as a Cullen, I didn't truly understand the full value of a dollar.

I'd never wanted for anything.

Alice bought my clothes, Esme and Rose purchased food, and Carlisle took care of educational necessities. But in the same token, I didn't think that I was spoiled.

I didn't go out of my way to go shopping (attributed to the fact that I hated it), and I never asked for more than was given to me. I appreciated every single thing that I owned, and understood that the Cullens provided for me better than I could've imagined and possibly better than I deserved.

I never bothered with asking about the cost of things. If Alice hung a few pairs of jeans in my closet, they could've been from Wal-mart or some designer boutique for all I cared.

But I understood expensive gifts, and a car worth more than most people make in a year was definitely an expensive gift.

I looked at Edward, awaiting his answer.

"Not much, considering the quality," he replied evasively.

"Huh." Jasper chuckled, letting it drop. I wasn't nearly so complacent.

"Edward," I demanded quietly, "seriously, how much did you spend on this?"

"Does it really matter?" His eyes were begging me not to push the issue.

"Well, yes, it does." I was relentless.

"It's rather rude to ask the cost of a gift, Bella."

As if I could be guilted so easily. I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him.

He sighed, as though my demands were just ludicrous. Glancing skyward, his lips moved swiftly and near silently, making it impossible for me to make out the words. Lucky for me, there was someone around who apparently found it amusing to make this difficult on both of us and who just happened to have super-human hearing.

Jasper perked, looking at me with a cheerful grin. "What was that Edward? Two hundred and fifty _thousand_ dollars?"

I stiffened, jerking the hand I'd been tentatively reaching toward the glossy paint job away as though I'd been electrocuted.

Okay. I'd been expecting a rather large sum but, two hundred and fifty thousand dollars? I felt the air rush out of my lungs in a giant whoosh.

Edward rolled his eyes. "So?"

Jasper shrugged. "That's more than all nine of Alice's Beetles, combined."

I swayed slightly on my feet.

Edward simply scoffed. "The Roadster cost five hundred K, Jasper. So yeah, no comparison."

Five hundred thousand dollars?! For a car?! That was more than most people spent on their house! I felt perilously close to hyperventilating.

"I suppose you're right. Still, Bella would have the second most expensive car in the garage. Think you can handle that?"

"I bought it for her," Edward replied haughtily.

"Knowing full well that she doesn't like to accept expensive things from us."

I wanted to inform them that despite my silence I was, in actuality, still there. I just needed a few seconds to find my voice.

"Yeah, because those Arabians were so cheap."

My head jerked toward Jasper at this. He'd told me he and Carlisle had gotten the horses from a farm estate sale, for practically nothing.

Jasper looked like he wanted to strangle Edward.

"What?" I managed to squeak.

"Oh yeah," Edward continued, smirking in Jasper's direction. "The Arabians are purebred, they set Jasper and Carlisle back at least twenty grand a piece.

Okay. Needed to sit. Right now.

I stumbled over to the padded workbench in the area where Emmett pretended to be a handyman, resting my hand on my chest.

Instantly Edward and Jasper were by my side, proverbial pissing contest forgotten.

"Are you okay?" Jasper murmured, while Edward began to examine me for injury.

I nodded, closing my eyes for just a moment and taking a few shallow breaths.

I was surrounded by what consisted of more than a million dollars (a _million_ dollars!) worth of metal and auto parts. Our house was huge, a room for every person, and not the only one that Esme and Carlisle owned. Every closet, vampire and human, was filled with clothing that I'd begun to suspect was worth nearly as much as these cars.

"Just how much money do you guys have?" I breathed suddenly, blinking my eyes open to look first at Jasper and then at Edward.

Far from tactful, I knew, but the undeniable curiosity was eating me up.

They glanced at one another, before Edward's face broke into a crooked grin and Jasper chuckled.

"You mean how much money do _we_ have?" Edward gestured between the three of us.

I shook my head numbly. No way. I was not to be included in this.

"Bella?" Jasper queried, his expression bemused. "Have you ever checked the balance on the ATM card that Carlisle gave you?"

Instantly, my hand flew to cover my pocket where the blue leather card holder that Carlisle had given me for my fifteenth birthday resided, the initials BMC embroidered in glittering silver on its cover. Inside had been my ID and a bank card with my name on it. Carlisle had smiled that kind smile of his, ruffled my hair, and told me to use it whenever I had need.

My use consisted of perhaps four ATM withdrawals in the amount of twenty dollars each.

Like I said, I wanted for nothing.

"No. I rarely even use it."

Edward laughed. "Next time you're at the ATM, go ahead and check the balance. You probably could've bought that car yourself with your bank card."

I went rigid. "What?!"

I would have never, ever imagined the wealth that my family had access to. I mean, yeah, they've been around a couple hundred years, but aside from Carlisle, they don't even work!

"It's true," Jasper agreed. "Carlisle probably has about five hundred in there for you, and I add some occasionally."

I knew, immediately, that he wasn't speaking strictly in hundreds.

"Same here, and I know Rose likes to ensure that you have spending money."

"Spending money?!" I stammered, finding my voice. "Spending money is twenty dollars to go see a movie! Or five bucks to get some lunch with your friends. Spending money is _not_ five hundred thousand dollars!" I was practically shrieking now.

"Whoa, easy there, Bella," Jasper chuckled, and I felt a warm wave of tranquility push my rising panic back.

"Alright, what the hell are you guys doing to my baby sister?" A gruff voice demanded from the open doorway, and I looked up in relief. I could really use a big old Emmett hug right about now. "Oh hey, what's this?"

And just like that, my supposed savior was easily diverted by the brand new shiny.

Edward jumped to his feet, all boastful grins, and sashayed over to where Emmett was examining my new car.

"Oh that? Just a Bentley Continental GT..."

"...Convertible. Swan Lake exterior," Emmett finished.

"Spring Lake," Jasper interjected.

"Silver Lake," Edward corrected irritably.

"Yeah, whatever, a chick color."

"Hey!" I grumbled.

"Whose is it?" Emmett asked, as though finding a brand new quarter million dollar car in the garage was an everyday occurrence.

"Bella's," Edward and Jasper voiced at the same moment.

Emmett whistled. "Very nice, Bella. Big spender."

Surely he didn't think that I'd… No way… I stared at him incredulously, finding enough presence of mind to inform him sharply, "_I didn't buy it!"_

"I got it for her birthday," Edward said with such egotism that I could've smacked him across the back of the head. Where was Rose when you needed her?

Edward peered over his shoulder at me with a lop-sided grin. "I'm way too fast for her."

I didn't want to, but I smiled. Just a little.

"Whew, how'd you get her to agree to that? Remember that bracelet I wanted to buy her last time we were in Port Angeles? Stubborn as a mule, that girl."

"Yeah, hi, Emmett? I may be human, but my hearing _does_ extend as far as the length of the garage."

Edward chuckled while Emmett turned and stuck his tongue out at me. I returned the face. Jasper had taken a seat next to me and was watching the entertainment that was his family with quiet bemusement.

"I didn't tell her, actually. But she's going to accept it, aren't you Bella?" Edward glanced at me.

Oh, hello hot seat.

How could I think of a polite way to say no without Edward hearing it?!

"You can't," he answered in response to my thoughts, and I jumped slightly at the realization that he was suddenly standing mere inches before me.

Crap!

"Bella," he said in a quiet, cajoling tone; his voice was positively musical. I felt a cold fingertip brush my chin just before my face was tipped upward and I met Edward's gaze. My breath caught as I found myself suddenly drowning in liquid topaz. "You know I picked this especially for you, and it would please me if you were to accept my gift." His lilting words wrapped around me like a velvet blanket and I shivered softly. His cool, sweet breath fanned my face as he quietly commanded, "Breathe."

It seemed inconsequential at the moment, but if Edward wanted me to, I couldn't deny his request. I forced a quick shuddering inhalation, surprised to find my lungs aching slightly. From far away, I heard Jasper's voice, growling softly, "Stop it."

Edward didn't heed the advice, and at the moment, I didn't particularly mind. A warm haze seemed to have clouded my mind in the most pleasant of manners.

"Now, you wouldn't want to hurt my feelings by refusing my gift, would you Bella?"

I shook my head mutely. Anything as long as he continued to look at me like this.

His lips quirked into a gorgeous little half smile, and my heart faltered.

Jasper's hand came into my line of vision blocking me from Edward's golden gaze and I frowned, tipping my head to see around the pale fingers.

Edward pushed the appendage away, and I sighed happily as our eyes met once more. I thought I might have heard Emmett laughing quietly somewhere. "So you'll accept the car then?"

I nodded absently and the smile that broke free on Edward's face was nothing short of angelic. I was pleased that I was the one to provoke such a reaction.

He stared at me quietly for several seconds before suddenly pulling away.

"Great!" I jerked slightly, drawn out of my stupor by the volume of the exclamation. "It's all set then."

"What?" I asked drowsily, glancing around.

Jasper was tense at my side, and I peered at his balled up fists curiously.

"Dammit, Emmett, why didn't you stop him?" he suddenly snarled.

I looked up at the hulking shadow of my protective older brother with a frown. He shrugged casually, appearing entirely unconcerned with whatever had just occurred.

"Why didn't _you_ stop him?" he countered. "It seemed pretty harmless to me. Maybe we could use it to get Bella over that whole humble bit. Besides, he reminded her to breathe."

Reminded me to breathe?

Realization dawned, and I felt my hackles rise.

That..._bastard_!

I could accept their unnatural grace, and their inhuman speed. Even their precise senses had become less disconcerting over the years.

But I would never accede to _that_.

Call it glamour or hypnotizing, confusion or charm; when it came right down to it, it was irritating and...well _cheating_!

I'd once seen Rose use it to get out of a speeding ticket.

As far as I knew, no one had ever used that particular 'power' on me intentionally, until today. I felt my cheeks flush with the sudden anger that wracked me.

"Tsk, language, Bella," Edward admonished.

"There are plenty worse words I could think of to call you, _Edward_," I hissed his name as though it were one of those things. "You...You Dazzled me! On _purpose_!"

"You were being unreasonable."

No one condescended like Edward, let me tell you.

"Unreasonable?! You spent a quarter of a million dollars on a car, which I can't even _drive_, incidentally, and _I'm_ unreasonable? You are...You are just too much, Edward Cullen!"

Jasper made the mistake of chuckling quietly beside me and I shot him a glare that quickly shut him up.

"Actually, Bella, I've already remedied that problem."

I scoffed, "Yeah? Did you take my driver's test for me?"

He rolled his eyes. "Of course not. I did, however, set it up for you to take your test on Sunday."

Sunday...But it was already Wednesday!

Anxiety abruptly swamped me, leaving no room for anger, and my fingers knotted in the hem of my shirt. "Sunday?" I breathed. "I am not ready to take a driving test by Sunday!"

"We got ya covered, Bells. We're going to take you out over the next couple of days. You'll be a pro by Sunday," Emmett promised from somewhere beneath my car.

My car.

My two hundred and fifty thousand dollar car.

Oh my God.

I scrambled for excuses why this would not work.

"I just...You guys know that my feet are not to be trusted. I don't think that adding a two ton vehicle to the equation is helpful for anyone."

My last line of defense began to cave with the realization that I was fighting a losing battle. I looked to Jasper hopefully.

"You do just fine on a horse," he remarked, rising to join Emmett as he popped the hood.

Damn Jasper.

"Fine!" I capitulated. "Fine! I'll take the car, and I'll take your _stupid_ driving lessons and I'll take the driving test! Happy?!"

Dramatic? Perhaps. But I felt it got my exasperated point across quite nicely.

Edward kissed the tip of my nose, somehow managing a moue and a smug smile all at once. He uttered an infuriatingly blasé "Only if you are", before joining the other two idiots.

Grumbling, I pushed to my feet, leaving the boys to examine whatever it was under the hood of a car that made it run.

As I stalked into the house, my mind was whirling wildly with all that had happened. My strange illness; there was so much to talk to both Alice and Carlisle about. And Edward's outrageous gift. I shook my head.

Only if I was, indeed.

* * *

"Bella?"

A quiet, melodic voice drifted into the nebulous depths of my tranquil slumber, and I stirred.

"Bella, love?"

I blinked blearily, swimming to sleep's surface slowly. For just a moment, staring up at Esme's perfect smile in confusion, I wondered where I was.

Emmett's sudden laughter caused me to flinch slightly, serving as a sufficient, if unnecessarily loud, reminder that I was in the living room with everyone, watching a movie. Well. If watching a movie and sleeping had suddenly adopted the same meaning.

My head was resting in Esme's lap and her dexterous fingers were threading gently through my hair, a slow, repetitive motion that was quickly lulling me back toward lethargy. My feet were lying in another lap but I was feeling far too lazy to take a peek at who it belonged to.

"Love, why don't you go on up to bed, hm? It's been quite the day for you."

She was right. I nodded sluggishly but didn't move.

"Would you like me to carry you up?" she asked quietly, hushed laughter tingeing her words.

Regardless of what I knew of their strength, it always struck me as odd to see Rose and Esme, and especially Alice, performing feats that some human men had difficulty with. I shook my head slowly, murmuring groggily, "Just give me a few seconds."

Her fingers stroked gently along my cheek, and I sighed contentedly, basking in the warm love that I saw in her gaze. It was hard to believe that a monster, like that had broken free of Edward's control, resided in the woman I considered unconditionally to be my mother. It was impossible to imagine.

"What are you thinking about?"

I couldn't bring myself to tell her the truth, not under the soft, tawny scrutiny of her gaze, so I simply shook my head. "Nothing."

It took me a few minutes, and a couple more boisterous howls from Emmett, but I finally managed to force myself into a sitting position. I glanced to the far end of the couch, from which Carlisle smiled warmly back at me. I leaned forward, wrapping my arms around his shoulders suddenly, feeling silly and emotional in my weariness. He chuckled, holding me close for a moment, brushing a kiss to the top of my head.

"Would you like _me_ to carry you up?" he asked.

I laughed, pulling away, "No."

I took quick stock of the others' locations. Emmett and Rose were sharing a recliner, while Jasper and Alice played checkers on the floor, their hands moving so quickly I couldn't be sure who was winning.

"Is Edward hunting?" I didn't realize I'd planned to ask until the words left my lips.

"Umm...I don't think so, he was just around a little while ago," Rose responded, glancing at me with a smile.

"Well, I'm going to head up to bed. I'm sure I'm going to need a heap of patience for tomorrow's driving instructions. You know...after last time..."

I earned several chuckles for bringing up the last horrific lessons.

"C'mere kiddo," Emmett demanded, and I slid off the couch, stumbling only a little as I made my way over to him. He wrapped me in the bear hug I could've used earlier, while Rose kissed both of my cheeks.

"Night guys."

"Night, Bella," they chorused.

Now, it was true, I really did need to get some sleep if I had any hope of surviving the next day, but maybe, just maybe, I wanted to take a teensy peek at my new car. Maybe sit inside of it a little. Just because, you know, it was nice, and I was curious.

So, I bypassed the staircase, and bee-lined for the garage door. It creaked slightly as I opened it, and I found myself peering around suspiciously, blushing. After the fuss I'd made today, I wasn't exactly anxious to get caught fawning over the object I'd made such a show of refusing.

If anyone heard my snooping, they let me go about my business unscathed.

I tiptoed into the garage, shivering just a little at the cool concrete beneath my bare feet. Reaching over, I hit the light switch on the wall, a startled gasp escaping my lips.

"Edward?!"

I don't know why I asked, because of course, it was.

He was sitting in the driver's seat of the new car, smiling faintly. I stood there for a moment, perhaps Dazzled from afar as I took him in.

My family is attractive. There is absolutely no doubt about that. I'd observed the stares, heard the gossip and as I grew older, even I couldn't deny their beauty, especially in regards to Jasper and Edward, heck even Emmett and Carlisle. The thoughts always gave me pause. I wasn't particularly ashamed of them, but I knew they probably weren't normal familial thoughts.

Of course, we weren't exactly the Cleavers, either.

Edward looked just a little silly behind the wheel of the effeminately colored car, but good nonetheless. His eyes were soft, brilliant gold in the fluorescent lighting, the color reflected faintly in his disheveled auburn locks. He was wearing that half grin that I found particularly appealing, and his immaculate clothing, from the charcoal sweater, to the white collared shirt underneath, right down to his blue jeans, had me glancing at my old pajamas, a pink tank top with a rearing horse on it, and matching flannel pants with slight self-consciousness.

I shrugged it off.

It was just Edward after all.

Crossing my arms over my chest, I tipped my head to one side with a smile.

"Sit in the dark garage often?"

I expected him to retaliate with some comment as to why I'd come out here, to tease me with the fact that I wanted to take a closer peek at the car he'd bought for me. He surprised me.

Leaning over, he popped open the passenger's door and smiled invitingly.

"Care for a ride, pretty lady?"

I rolled my eyes, but found my feet moving anyway.

It was hard to believe that the angelic young man (young looking anyway) before me had seriously thought of taking my life just over a week ago.

"Bella, please, can we just…Not tonight?" He pleaded softly.

_It isn't intentional, Edward. I'm sorry, it's just…on my mind._

He nodded as I slid into the car with him. As the look of it had promised, the cool leather seat was beyond comfortable. I leaned back with a sigh.

"I'm sorry, that was selfish of me," he said after several minutes of companionable silence had elapsed. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I looked at him. Did I want to talk about what had happened? Stir up the memories that would make me scared of him all over again?

Not really.

I shook my head silently, and though I'm sure he'd never admit it, he looked relieved.

"Well, how about a ride then?"

"Edward," I laughed softly. "I'm not even dressed, and it's like, eleven thirty, I should probably get to bed." Subconsciously I wondered if I should run back in and tell Esme or Carlisle that I'd be going out. It was silly, really, considering who I'd be going with.

"Geez, Bella, are you seventeen or seventy?" he teased. "Besides, Alice tells me the flannel pajama look is quite fashionable these days."

I laughed at his ridiculous jokes just because I could. Because I wasn't so preoccupied with black eyes and gnashing teeth that I couldn't see Edward.

"Alright, fine. Let's see what _my_ new car can do then."

He beamed, turning the key, which I hadn't noticed was already in the ignition, and the engine purred to life. I had a feeling that despite its silence, the car would be far from inconspicuous.

As we pulled out of the garage, Edward reached over me, grabbing my seatbelt and clicking it into place. I rolled the window down just a bit, enjoying the mingling of the crisp night air and the always discernible new car smell.

"You know," he began suddenly, and I glanced away from the window to look at him. In the low light his pale profile looked more relaxed than I'd seen it in days. "I do want to apologize for using my, what did you call it, _Dazzle_, on you earlier."

I chuckled, cutting this conversation off in the bud. I knew my own temper, and I didn't want to walk home. Not wearing shoes, and all.

"Oh no, you don't. That is a conversation for _after_ I'm changed." I shook my fist at him.

Internally, I flinched slightly, realizing that while I was attempting to avoid a controversial topic I'd opened a whole other can of worms.

But Edward refrained from lecturing me, refrained from reminding me that it was 'good' to be human, and that there was no guarantee that behaving well as a vampire guaranteed a spot in the afterlife, et cetera, et cetera.

If I was shocked by this, which I was, I was astonished by what he did next. His strong, cool fingers wrapped around my wrist, disallowing the return of my hand to my lap, and he leaned over, brushing his lips very gently to my knuckles. Our eyes met briefly during this exchange, and I felt my heart stutter, felt what I was sure must be all of the blood in my body rush straight into my face. I looked away quickly, reminding myself, this time, to breathe.

What could he have possibly meant by that?! The question rang resoundingly in my mind as he pulled away.

I couldn't begin to guess, and it was not something I planned to investigate while in such close confines with a mind reader. I shoved it out of my brain as Edward gingerly set my hand on my leg.

I pressed my lips together, feeling it was the only sure way to contain all of the questions that were begging to be asked.

So much for comfortable silence.

"So, new school this year. Should be interesting," I stammered awkwardly. The spot where his lips had touched was pleasantly warm, despite his unnaturally low body temperature.

"Yeah, can't wait," he replied, his voice fairly dripping sarcasm.

A quiet sigh of relief passed my lips. He, at least, seemed unconcerned with what had just happened.

"You know, you could just stay home with Rose. You probably deserve a little time off."

He slanted me a glance, the corner of his lips tipped up. "And miss your last two years of high school? Unlikely."

I chuckled. "You and Emmett had better take it easy this year."

He blinked, giving me that feigned innocence that I saw through all too easily. "Whatever are you implying Ms. Cullen?"

"Really? You mean you guys didn't comb through the minds of everyone at our last high school, find any and every guy…"

"And two girls," he interjected, which caused another bout of blushing.

"And two girls," I added, "Who were thinking of me in any kind of love interest way, and proceed to 'evil eye' them all away from me?"

"We'd never do such a thing," he declared solemnly.

I snorted. "Yeah, okay."

And then he dealt a low, if logical blow. "Bella, if we're just going to be changing you on your eighteenth birthday, or after graduation if I have my way, why would you want to engage in a relationship with someone who can never see you again after?"

Well, when he put it that way…

I hadn't even thought of it, to be honest. Once they changed me, that was it. There was no more possibility for human experiences, no chance at dating or falling in love.

"That's not true," he chided gently. "There are other vampires out there. It's not that you can't fall in love, or even 'date' if you'd like, but you won't be able to indulge in such activities with humans."

"Oh," I breathed. I wasn't particularly attached to any humans, no, but the implications were still sobering. "So, no vampire has ever fallen in love with a human?"

The silence was so prolonged that I had to look away from my fidgeting hands and up into his face. His stare was incredibly intense, and not for the first time, I wished I had his ability.

Finally, he said quietly, "Most sane vampires refrain from such things. You've seen our strength Bella, and now, what we're capable of if we lose our control, which is tenuous by nature. To embark on a relationship with a human, aware that a simple embrace could crush them, that a minor wound could signal the end of their life, well it would be foolish at best, and absolutely disastrous at worst. That's not to say that it's never happened, or that all such situations end poorly, but I've certainly never seen such a couple."

"Wow, I guess I just figured, since you live with humans, it was bound to happen."

He shrugged. "You have to remember, most of us _don't_ live amongst humans. The majority of vampires are of a nomadic nature. They must move from place to place to avoid suspicion, as they're not simply killing wildlife."

I shuddered softly at the unspoken conclusion.

"Some vampires have taken to using humans for…hrm…pleasure if you will, but that generally isn't a long term relationship." He stared straight ahead as he spoke, and I had a feeling that he'd have been blushing if he could. Lucky for him, I was blushing enough for both of us.

I'm not sure what prompted my next words. "Have you?"

"Hm?"

Because there was no way to verbalize it without my head exploding for the profusion of blood, I let him pick the details out of my brain.

_Have you ever taken a human…lover?_

His face was so astonished when he looked at me that I could only assume he was horrified that I even knew the meaning of the word lover.

"Absolutely not!" he exclaimed, obviously outraged that I would even think such a thing.

I didn't push the issue.

A low rumble of thunder echoed ominously on the horizon and I shivered. Edward reached over, resting his hand atop mine, giving it a gentle squeeze. His touched continued long past completion of the comforting gesture.

I stared down at our hands, mine dwarfed by his own, resting lightly on my leg.

"Edward, how long have you been alone?"

I briefly wondered if I should elaborate. After all, I knew he'd been alive for nearly a hundred years. Had he never found someone that appealed to him, in all that time?

He must've accepted qualification in the form of my thoughts, because he answered quietly, "Forever, Bella."

The words were carried on a low undercurrent of sorrow, and I frowned, reaching over to rest my other hand lightly atop his, sandwiching the cool marble appendage between the fragile warmth of my own.

"Have you ever been in love?"

His fingers tensed slightly, and my eyes were drawn to his face. He was looking at me.

If I didn't have complete faith in the absolute accuracy of his driving skill, I might have been concerned with how little he was looking at the road.

He didn't speak for such a long period of time, that I wondered if he might not answer. Finally he replied simply, "Yes."

I didn't need to be a mind reader to receive the clear message that the topic was closed.

* * *

My dreams that night, what I could recall of them, were interesting to say the least. On several occasions I found myself awake, staring at the ceiling, struggling to recall the strange images that had woken me.

Unfortunately, I was left with nothing more than fleeting impressions. School, Edward, driving, Jasper, Emmett...Brief flashes that made no sense out of context.

It was during one of these inconvenient awakenings that I glanced at my bedside clock. Four twenty seven. I groaned softly and threw my arm over my eyes.

Of all the nights for restless sleep...

Inevitably, my thoughts drifted to the curious conversation I'd had with Edward in the car.

We hadn't spoken another word until we'd returned home, and while the silence seemed significant, it wasn't uncomfortable. He'd kissed my cheek and bid me goodnight, and I'd scampered straight up to my room to try and make sense of what was happening.

A futile task, I tell you.

In my unpracticed, naïve, inexperienced opinion, with the way Edward had watched me, the way he'd kissed my hand, I'd tentatively presumed that _maybe_ he might have an interest in me that wasn't strictly platonic.

But that was laughable, right? Obviously speaking on the subject just made him get a little intense, and I mistook that to be directed at me. Right?

I just didn't know.

And if I my misguided meanderings _were_ correct, was that okay with me? If Edward liked me, you know _liked_ me, how did I feel about it?

It was so left field that I didn't have an answer for myself.

Tension gathered at the base of my skull and I pulled one of my pillows over my face.

Not the best subject to attempt to fall asleep to.

So I promised myself that I would investigate the matter at a date that didn't involve ungodly hours of the A.M. and I let my mind wander where it would. It touched lightly on the shiny new car in the garage, before the image of Jasper shimmered into focus.

Another touchy subject. Recently, Jasper was playing the leading role in the nighttime theater of my mind. And these were not family friendly dreams.

It bothered me, but only slightly. Which bothered me even more, because I felt as though I should be upset about it.

Ugh.

None of that either. I can't control my dreams, dammit. Jasper was gorgeous. I couldn't blame my subconscious for noticing.

I reached for the small white remote on my nightstand, hitting the power button for my stereo. Within seconds the sweet strains of a Chopin piano concerto filled the room. I fell back, burrowing into my pillows with a sigh.

The music had soon lulled me into a tranquil, half-conscious state, and it was only a few more minutes until slumber claimed me.

_

* * *

__It was going to storm._

_If the wild, damp wind that wound its way around me wasn't proof enough, the tumultuous clouds roiling ominously overhead were a rather clear sign. Though it was only mid-afternoon the sky had been cast into almost complete darkness. A humid gale whipped my hair from its neat coif, so that it lashed at my cheeks, tugged at the long, heavy skirt of my dress until it flapped against my legs. I stumbled slightly beneath the onslaught, realizing with a start that I was in no position to succumb to my inherent clumsiness. _

_I was on a balcony, and as I staggered into the wrought iron railing I realized that while the fall probably wouldn't kill me, it would certainly be less than pleasant. I pushed backward with a soft cry, heart racing. _

_Where was I? What was this place?_

_The answers seemed unimportant in comparison to my sudden, driving need to get to safety. I whirled frantically uttering a startled cry as two strong arms closed around me._

"_Bella, what's the matter darlin'?" Jasper's sweet southern drawl whispered over my ear and I sagged against him with relief._

"_Jasper, where are we? What's going on?"_

_Jasper laughed softly, the sound sending the most curious shivers up my spine, as he wrapped his hands around my arms, pushing me back so that he could look at me. Our eyes met, and I felt my breath catch at the emotions evident in his gaze. Lust, love, adoration, anxiety. _

"_Nothing to concern yourself over."_

_What…What did that even mean?!_

_I was about to ask that very thing when he suddenly leaned close, his lips a hairsbreadth from my own. "Dance with me, darlin'?" His cool, sweet breath bathed my face and my senses scattered. _

_Suddenly it didn't matter that I was as graceful as a bull in a china shop, it didn't matter than the portico was no better than a death trap with the storm brewing around us._

_I nodded helplessly and he smiled. It was a lazy, masculine smile that was capable of melting bones._

_He drew me closer, until I could feel every muscled plane of his body against my own. Singing quietly beneath his breath, he led me around the terrace with practiced ease, righting me when I tripped, and never once laughing at my incompetence._

"_I didn't know you could dance," I murmured._

"_There's a lot about me you don't know, Bella."_

"_Tell me," I urged._

_His smile was teasing, yet something very serious lurked behind his playful demeanor. "All in due time."_

_His voice began to quiet as he dispatched of any remaining space between us, his face lowering toward mine. _

_My breathing faltered. Was he going to…Should I stop him…_

_Jasper's cool, firm lips brushed mine, a tiny, intimate caress, just as a refined, velvet voice purred quietly from behind me, "Mind if I cut in?"_

_Edward._

_Jasper held me possessively, his eyes darkening slightly as he righted himself to watch Edward impassively._

"_I'd rather you didn't."_

_Edward's laughter was quiet, yet rung with hostility. _

"_Ah, but I'm going to all the same."_

_Did I want to go with Edward? _

_I didn't have a chance to decide as I was passed from one vampire to the other._

"_Stand on my feet, love, so you don't fall."_

_I glanced down at our feet, frowning slightly. "But Jasper…"_

_A low growl drew my eyes back to his face and he said quietly, each word enunciated perfectly. "I am not Jasper."_

_I nodded, stepping onto his feet as delicately as I could._

_We began to glide around the now trembling balcony, and I couldn't help but laugh softly at the ease and grace of the dance. _

_Felicitous finesse, requiring little thought and less work. Effortless._

_I glanced at Jasper, who was watching us with an indefinable expression._

_Ambitious determination, the satisfaction of completion all the more triumphant for the exertion. _

"_What are you thinking, my love?" Edward murmured, and my eyes were drawn back to his angelic face._

"_You can't read my thoughts?" The notion didn't surprise me as much as it should, perhaps._

"_Humor me."_

_The words tumbled out of me, uncensored as the filter between my brain and my mouth was apparently out of order. "I'm thinking that I enjoy Jasper's company, because he challenges me, he makes me stand on my own two feet, and the things that I achieve when I'm with him feel like true accomplishments." Edward's growl and Jasper's purr mingled into one raw, animalistic noise. "But…" I quickly amended, "I also enjoy that you, Edward, know when I need a rock, when I'm not strong enough to stand on my own, when I need someone to ensure my success."_

_Now it was Edward's turn to look pleased, while Jasper frowned thoughtfully._

_Edward set me away from him gently, brushing the barest of kisses to the tip of my nose._

"_So?" he asked quietly._

_The sky above was illuminated by a sudden streak of lightning, followed quickly by a deafening crack of thunder. I shivered, wrapping my arms around myself as the wind that seemed to have died while I was held by the two men before me picked back up._

"_So what?" I murmured in confusion._

_The two exchanged a glance, and they each turned their incredibly different, yet equally devastating smiles on me._

"_Which of us do you want?" Jasper asked, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world._

_I blinked. Which of them did I want?_

_At that precise moment the heavens opened up and deluge of frigid rain came pouring down upon us. I gasped, hoping that we could, perhaps take this confusing conversation indoors, but they were both standing stock still, expectant._

"_Why do I have to choose just one of you?" I demanded softly._

_Again with that look that suggested I was in someway mentally handicapped._

"_We're not good with sharing," Edward answered._

_They both took a step toward me, and I took an answering step back._

"_So which will it be, darlin'?"_

_They each held an imploring hand out to me and I took another step back, coming into contact with the insufficient railing._

"_Choose, my love," Edward prompted._

"_I…I don't want to!" I exclaimed._

_Choose between two of my favorite men in the world? What next, I can never see Emmett again?_

_I didn't understand what was happening, and I cringed as they moved closer yet._

"_Choose," Jasper urged._

_There was a moment, a resounding thunderclap, a brilliant flash of electricity, and the railing at my back faded into nothingness. I was falling…falling…_

_Two hands caught me, and I looked up, dangling over a precipice that seemed infinite. _

"_Choose," they murmured together, and I stared at the strong, pale hands holding my wrists._

_Several tense moments passed and I swallowed convulsively._

"_I can't," I murmured, somehow feeling selfish for the decision._

_They shared a look._

_And then they let me go._

_

* * *

_

**A/N: And there we have it. :D**

**Please hit the review button and let me know what you think.**


	11. Drive Me Crazy

**A/N: So, don't kill me. I'm sooo sorry that it took me so long to update! A serious bout of writer's block, as well as some craziness at work were completely kicking my ass!**

**BUT, to make up for it. Here is a lengthy ten thousand word chapter. :D There's some yummy Jasper goodness in it that I promise you'll love. Some sweet sisterly bonding. As well as some Bella self-realizations.**

**Also, I've been trying to make sure I respond to everyone that reviews, but these past couple weeks have been just nuts for me, so I apologize that I wasn't able to get to you. If I didn't respond to you, let me just say here, that I absolutely adore you for leaving me a review, and of course, for reading. You guys are the reason I keep writing! So thank you to my readers and especially to my reviewers!**

**Also, to those responding to my Beta inquiry/request, I will be getting back to you soon!**

**Chapter 9: Bella PoV**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 9

Drive Me Crazy

_Falling...falling..._

I jerked awake as I hit the ground, a startled gasp forcing what felt like all of the air out of my lungs as I bolted upright. My stomach, which I'd apparently left up on the imaginary balcony, lurched back into place with a jolt of nausea as my bleary eyes hastily took in my surroundings.

Gone were the angry gray cloud cover and the wild wind, which had eventually gotten its wish of seeing me fly right off the terrace. Gone was the white stucco villa that had housed that homicidal device. And Jasper and Edward were definitely nowhere in sight. I tried not to examine the slight pang of disappointment I felt at that too closely.

I glanced around my room with a slight frown, realizing that, while I hadn't plummeted headlong to my demise, I_ had_ managed to at least eject myself from my bed. I fell back with a low groan, closing my eyes against the cheerful yellow paint of my ceiling. My sheets had followed me to the carpet and were twisted tightly around me, forcing one of my arms into a rather awkward position. I idly wondered if this was what a strait jacket felt like.

Considering my dreams as of late, it wasn't out of the question that I might actually find out.

Between the disturbingly pleasant fantasies of Jasper as my...paramour, the thankfully less frequent nightmares of Edward tearing my throat out, and last night's dramatic little tableau, I was starting to wonder if my mind and feet hadn't joined forces in some evil conspiracy to ensure my downfall. Visions of disembodied feet and brains, huddled over what looked an awful lot like football plays, danced through my consciousness.

And if thoughts like _that_ didn't land you in a strait jacket, I wasn't sure what possibly would.

My mind eventually drifted from the villainous plots of my personified appendages, to the one thing I wasn't really feeling up to reliving. Of course, because I didn't want to think of it, it promptly lodged itself in the forefront of my brain.

Last night's bewildering dream.

It had been so unrealistic that I was surprised 'dream Bella' hadn't suspiciously started looking around for a hidden camera.

First, there was the boys' behavior. They had gone well beyond family affection with their endearing pet names and familiar touches. I paused in my nebulous meanderings here, anticipating a debilitating blush. Several seconds passed, and rather than the usual flush of embarrassment, I felt nothing but a small tingle of pleasure remembering the purred drawl of 'darlin' and the cool velvet coated 'my love'. Of course, realization of my reaction to this hit and my cheeks were no less than crimson.

Not appropriate, Bella. Not appropriate at all!

The nonverbal chastisement trilled in a coy, permissive voice that sounded an awful lot like Alice, and lent absolutely no credence toward sincerity. Oh God, what was wrong with me? I threw my free arm over my eyes with a pathetic moan.

I sent a silent prayer to my ceiling that Edward was not within 'hearing' range, because despite my mortification, my newly iniquitous brain seemed intent to just continue right along on this subject.

The dancing went debatably as well as I supposed it would have in real life, though I doubt that I would have relented quite so easily. The whole puppy dog eye thing didn't work on me too well.

Of course, Jasper hadn't been making sad doe eyes, had he? No, he'd looked at me like he wanted to push me right up against that glistening stucco wall and...

Okay, that's enough of that.

I tugged my resisting brain out of the gutter.

Sadly, this wasn't the first time I'd envisioned such things in relation to Jasper, so the cool touch of his lips, the doting words uttered in that sexy, er, no, nice, yes _nice_ Southern accent, well they didn't stand out as much as Edward's behavior had.

Even in my dreams Edward was bossy and completely overbearing, so it wasn't his personality.

Just the way he'd held me against him like I was the most fragile, most expensive glass ornament to ever come into existence, and the way he'd faintly, possessively enunciated the 'my' in my love, well, I'd never thought to experience such things from him, even in my dreams.

Top all of this with the cherry that was the kiss he'd placed on my hand, and you had yourself a delicious bowl of raging hormone sundae, emotional confusion optional.

Not nearly as tasty as it sounds, let me tell you. Unless, maybe, you enjoyed the teachings of Dr. Freud. In which case, I'm sure it was positively _delicious_.

When it came right down to it, I was probably just obsessing over nothing. I couldn't control my dreams after all, and I didn't really think that anything like that would happen for real, right?

But I was honest enough with myself that I could admit that I _did_ think this dream was something more than nonsense.

Hadn't I already begun to suspect that Edward wasn't being completely truthful in regards to his feelings toward me? After all, a lie by omission was still a lie. And as for Jasper...well, even if he felt nothing at all for me, I was definitely having some non-sisterly feelings toward him.

The label echoed sourly through my mind.

Sister.

The title really made me cringe at times like this.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the feeling of belonging that came with the appellation, and when Emmett defended me as his baby sister, well, it was a heady feeling knowing that such a powerful guy held me in such high regards, but there were times when it was just...no good! After all, despite having lived with them, grown up with them (me being the only one doing the growing, of course), I had absolutely nothing genetically in common with them. In fact, we weren't even the same species!

The callous thought made me blanch slightly as my justifications took a rather mercenary turn.

The Cullens were still mostly human. Better humans than most _actual_ humans, really.

But the fact remained that when it scientifically came right down to it, we were family in name and emotion only. And it was okay if my emotions weren't the same for all of them. Right?

It was a perfectly logical argument. Flawless, even.

Unfortunately, it did nothing to ease my discomfort for not feeling more disturbed by my fluctuating emotions.

I made a mental note to speak with Carlisle, and soon.

"Mornin', lil sis!"

Emmett's cheerful visage drifted into my line of vision, peering just over the edge of my mattress and I gave a startled yelp.

"Jesus!" I breathed, resting a hand over my chest, lest my suddenly racing heart actually escape. "What are you doing?!"

He chuckled, glancing over my disheveled appearance. "Just making sure you hadn't forgotten about the big day!"

"Yeah, yeah. As if I could forget." The response was petulant, childish, and may I say, totally justified! The last time some of my siblings had taken me out, I'd driven approximately seven feet for the bickering, order-giving and general chaos that had ensued. Honestly, I didn't have much higher hopes for today's session. At least Jasper could keep everyone relatively calm.

"It won't be that bad," he argued. "I won't let those two idiots do anything too stupid."

Typical Emmett, here. "And what about you, huh?" I called him out, my voice incredulous, as I began to struggle my way free of the cotton prison of my sheets.

He looked genuinely confused. "Me?" He made it sound as if I'd affronted his delicate sensibilities. As though anything about Emmett could be described as delicate.

"Yeah, you!" I grimaced as the covers refused to relinquish its prize of my arm. Emmett watched the scuffle bemusedly, before finally taking pity on me and reaching down to pick me up, one massive arm wrapped around my waist, as he gently, patiently, disentangled me. I smiled my thanks before continuing with my intended tirade. "You have to promise me that you're going to be able to control yourself, and your temper, when it comes to Jasper and Edward, _and_ the other drivers on the road. You are not allowed to yell at anyone, dismember anyone, or damage any property. In fact, I'm even forbidding the evil eye. Got it?"

He sulked, as though I'd taken any prospect of fun right out of the day. I couldn't help but relent slightly when he turned those liquid topaz eyes on me, managing to somehow look contrite for any past wrong doing, and yet pleading that I would grant him some leeway.

"Alright, alright, the evil eye's okay, but nothing more."

He grinned, pulling me close against him and hugging me tightly. I smiled and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. I felt as tiny and fragile as a china doll in his arms, and he handled me just as carefully as if I were. I had a feeling that it would always be like this between the two of us, even when I became as strong and invincible as he was.

"So, why were you sleeping on the floor?" he inquired casually, and I glanced up.

"Eh, bad dream I must've fallen out of bed."

"Wanna talk about it?"

I briefly, insanely, considered it. The thought lasted all of a millisecond before I realized that Emmett knowing about potential crushes I had on our family members would be a bad thing. I hastily lied, "I don't really remember it anymore. Thanks, though, Em."

He nodded, leaning back against my headboard, just cradling me against the cool strength of his chest.

I sighed softly. "Do I really have to go today?"

His chuckle rumbled pleasantly just beneath my ear. "C'mon Bells, it really won't be that terrible. Don't you wanna learn to drive?"

I shrugged. "Not like you guys are going anywhere. You could just drive me around."

"I'm sure there will come a time when you don't want us tagging along." I heard him take a deep breath, and there was a lengthy pause, though I could tell he wasn't finished speaking. Finally he said, in a quiet rush, "I mean, what if you have a date or something?"

I blinked, my head whipping toward him so fast that if it weren't for his quick reflexes I would've undoubtedly managed to hurt myself on his thick skull. He pulled back swiftly, looking down at me. I knew what those words had cost him to say, and I suddenly felt as though this whole driving prospect might not be such a bad idea, if only to appease Emmett. I smiled brilliantly, hugging him tightly for a second. "You're right, Em. This will be good."

He nodded, setting me lightly on the bed, before springing up with an abundance of that enviable agility. He headed toward the door, suddenly glancing back at me over a broad shoulder. "That whole dating thing's never going to happen though, right?

I hastily nodded. "Of course not, Em." I was suddenly, infinitely glad that Emmett didn't have Edward's ability. I couldn't imagine what he'd do to poor Jasper if he saw us kissing (or worse) in my mind.

He nodded, if not satisfied by my reassurance, at least pretending he was.

He disappeared with a quiet click of the door.

I fell back against the pillows with a sigh.

It was going to be a long day.

* * *

Alice and Rose were huddled over the laptop in the kitchen when I finally summoned the will to trudge downstairs a half hour later. I mentally cringed as Alice looked up, her wide eyes giving me a quick once over. I knew that appraising look. That was the "You're a Cullen and you'd better dress like one" look. Luckily the blue jean/plaid navy hoodie met at least some of her finicky fashion police criteria, because her gaze narrowed only slightly and she nodded once, curtly, before turning back to the screen where Rose was pointing at something. I allowed myself an audible sigh of relief as I made my way over to the refrigerator. I had a feeling today would be stressful enough without hearing that I looked like a hobo, a moniker Alice assured me that she meant with the utmost affection.

I poured myself a glass of orange juice, leaning against the counter to watch the two of them bemusedly. They were doing the vampire thing, speaking so quickly that I could barely make out the words, let alone understand them, but they were obviously excited about something. I'd be willing to bet a fairly hefty sum that the monitor currently displayed some unpronounceable designer's fall line.

Alice froze, suddenly, her pretty gold eyes unfocused, blind to their surroundings. I leaned forward curiously. These visions Alice experienced had always intrigued me. Didn't it annoy her to have them constantly interrupting her daily life? How could she possibly keep up a façade of normalcy in school when she was constantly succumbing to her gift? Guess I'd find out.

She blinked quickly several times, as though she were just coming out of a dark tunnel into the sunlight. A small, Cheshire grin tugged at the corners of her lips and she suddenly looked at me.

"Bella, would you like to do a little shopping today?"

I arched a brow, downing the rest of my juice. I turned to rinse the glass out and set it lightly in the dishwasher. "You know, Ali, as much as I hate shopping, I would gladly cancel today's plans to hang out with you two if I thought I could in any way get away with it." I turned back to her with a rueful grin.

She was still smiling, unruffled by my proclamation. Rose also looked intensely amused. Huh. Obviously they knew something I didn't. Alice was quick to spill, as usual.

"Oh, yes, _driving lessons_." No missing the sarcasm there. I tucked my hands into the front pocket of my sweatshirt, watching her expectantly. "I assure you, those will last all of..." she paused with a small hum, wracking her brain for specifics. "Forty five minutes. The only thing you'll learn is that the combination you've chosen for today will be even worse than the one you chose last time."

I frowned. I wasn't anxious for this, no, but there was no way it could be worse than last time. I felt a small surge of rebellion at her declaration. A "I'm going to make this work now, just because she thinks I can't" sort of thought.

"We'll just see about that," I argued airily.

Rose chuckled, "That must be a first. Someone betting against Alice."

Alice looked positively gleeful. "The visions are subjective, after all," she sing-songed. "Care to make this interesting?" She pinned me with her sharp gaze, and I squirmed, caught as surely as a butterfly beneath a pin.

"Well..." I hedged hesitantly. "Depends on what you mean by interesting."

"Let's see here," she tapped one perfectly manicured finger against her chin, glancing at the ceiling. It didn't take much time at all before she'd attained that perfectly mischievous expression that she and Emmett so closely shared. "I got it! If you last forty five minutes or less, you not only go shopping with me and Rose today, but you let me dress you for the first day of school!" Huh, that didn't seem so bad. She quickly ruined that impression as she finished evilly, "Right down to the socks!

Oh. I shuddered lightly at the very idea of feeling that horrible, scratchy nylon against my bare legs.

"And if I last longer?" She'd have to make this good for me to even think about agreeing.

Rose piped in, much to Alice's chagrin, "Alice and I won't bother you about anything you decide to wear for a full year." Alice looked very much like she wanted to silence Rosalie in the worst imaginable ways.

"I dunno. Ali, think you'll be able to abide by these terms _when_ I win?"

Her sullen, betrayed expression faded at my competitive statement and she lifted her chin slightly. "Considering that _I'll_ be winning, I don't think that's even a concern."

"Hm," I replied, smiling just a little. "Guess we'll see."

She leapt gracefully over the kitchen island, landing silently before me with her hand extended. "Deal?"

I glanced at the appendage as though it might bite, before finally thrusting my own forward and shaking her small, cool hand. "Deal."

She took a slight step back, glancing me over as she'd done when I first entered. Her grin was far too cat-got-the-canary for my comfort, and I crossed my arms defensively across my chest.

"Bella, do you know when the last time I lost a bet was?" she suddenly asked.

My brow furrowed slightly, and I shook my head. "No."

She shrugged her tiny shoulders, her laughter ringing like a bell. "That makes two of us."

* * *

Alice's winning streak was definitely not about to be broken.

The realization hit approximately twenty three minutes after Edward had driven us out to the small, barely used road just south of our house.

Visions of the monstrosities she was going to try and clothe me in filled my mind as I tuned out Edward and Emmett's bickering. Ruffles and bows, hooks and buttons, lace and ribbon; I'd _seen_ the pictures from my childhood. I only hoped that hair styling wasn't included in this first day of school package, or I had a feeling that I'd be getting up a lot earlier than I was accustomed to.

"She should learn to drive with it on, or she's never going to know how!" Emmett's bellow was not to be ignored and I jumped slightly as my future misery was shoved right out the door by my present one.

I groaned and laid my head against the steering wheel. Twenty four minutes and counting.

"It's an unneeded distraction, Emmett. Unnecessary and inappropriate for a first time driver."

Emmett had been arguing with Edward for the past seven minutes that he couldn't very well teach me to drive without some proper driving music. Edward had declared such frivolities a nuisance and a danger. I didn't really care either way, I just wanted to get on with the driving already. Unfortunately I'd received only glares for my effort when I'd stated as such a few moments earlier.

I glanced in the rearview mirror where Jasper sat tight-lipped and silent. I felt rather sorry for him. Between my misery, Edward's anger and Emmett's belligerent frustration, he'd stopped trying to keep us calm a while ago. I wouldn't be surprised at all if, after being bombarded by our unpleasant emotions, he was feeding our moods with his own by now.

Our eyes met in the reflection, his pleading, and I shook my head, shrugging helplessly. I thought I saw a glimmer of a smile before Emmett's sudden shout had him slinking right back into brooding.

"Edward! Why do you always have to be such a bossy son of a bitch?!"

Edward growled softly turning slightly in his seat.

Jasper quickly intervened. "Whoa, alright." He placed a restraining hand on both of the angry men's shoulders, holding them apart. "You know, it's Bella's car, why not let her decide?"

I darted him an incredulous look in the mirror. Where we'd been companions in our suffering, misery loving company and all of that, he'd suddenly turned traitor. I felt three sets of eyes upon me and quickly tried to find a solution that would appease both contenders.

"Well...I..." I reached out, pushing play on Emmett's iPod. He crowed happily; until I quickly turned the volume down until it was little more than background noise.

Apparently this had been the wrong decision.

Emmett fell back against his seat pouting, actually _pouting_ and muttered under his breath that I was no fun. Edward on the other hand was glaring at me sullenly, and I was fairly certain he grumbled something about me disobeying him.

We sat in uncomfortable silence (save for the quiet strains of the Top Gun theme song) for several minutes before I forced a falsely cheerful smile into place and turned slightly to look at each of them.

"Okay! Let's get this lesson on the road!"

None of them even cracked a smile at my terrible pun, and I scowled, turning back to stare out the windshield. I quickly opted for a different approach.

_Edward, c'mon, please? I want to learn to drive my present._

"Why don't you ask Emmett for help, since you seem to agree with his opinions on the subject," he muttered sulkily.

You'd never know I was the youngest person in the car with the way they were acting. Emmett shook his head exaggeratedly, "Oh no! We wouldn't want my bad influence and distractions to be a _danger_ to Bella!"

Oh my God, seriously? What were they, five? I'd cheerfully take one of Rosalie's lectures on how tire pressure effected gas mileage over this petty idiocy any day.

I tipped my head back with a sigh as they started back up. Every ridiculous word exiting their cold, pale lips pushed my miserable frustration closer to anger, until finally…

"That's it!" I shouted. "Here, Emmett!" I reached out and turned the volume of the music up, yelling to be heard over the sudden clamor. "There! Here's your stupid driving music!"

All eyes in the car were on me, identically bewildered, but I didn't care.

"It doesn't matter Edward, because I'm not driving! Not now, not ever, not with any of you!"

My exit would've been a lot more impressive if I'd remembered to take off my seatbelt first. As it was, when I came up short after flinging the door open, they were all smart enough not to laugh. I jammed my finger onto the release button so hard that I winced, fairly certain I'd done some damage, but the second the safety device whirred back into place, I bolted out of the car.

I stumblingly sprinted out to the main road. My feet seemed to realize the sincerity of my anger and refrained from spilling me face first onto the pavement. Lucky for them.

I didn't glance once over my shoulder to see if any of them were coming after me as I began jogging back toward the house. They'd have to be crazy to think I wanted any of their company right now.

I'd run perhaps, a half a mile, when a yellow car came to slowly roll beside me. I glanced up in surprise, grimacing at the realization that it was a Beetle.

The window rolled down, and Rosalie's beautiful face filled the pane. She smiled sympathetically. Obviously, she didn't need to ask how things had went as Alice had probably told her everything. She asked teasingly, "Did you kill the idiots?"

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Wanted to, but you know, vampires."

Rose laughed and opened her door to me. Alice suddenly leaned around her, all smiles. "So, Bella, what do you think about pink?"

* * *

Luckily, Alice changed her mind on the whole pink thing, proclaiming loftily as I stepped out of a changing room that it made me look washed out, whatever that meant.

Unfortunately, vetoing pink didn't really lessen the selection I was forced to try on. Orange vest, green tank, white skirt, black jeans, red t-shirt. Ugh.

As I stepped out of the dressing room for what felt like the hundredth time, fully expecting Alice to verbalize her disgust while Rose just grimaced, I received a shock when the latter pursed her lips thoughtfully and the former declared, "Oooh."

Huh.

I'd given up on even looking at myself in the mirror, considering my opinions were about as listened to as one of Emmett's might have been, so I whirled expectantly toward the full-length mirror on the back of the door.

I glanced myself over, deciding hesitantly that it wasn't…awful. Certainly not to the extent that Alice could have abused her power with winning the bet.

The top was a little…girly for my usual tastes, and it certainly covered the whole lace and bows portion of my nightmarish vision of Alice's outfit for me, but it was acceptable, I reluctantly admitted to myself. Cerulean and black flower patterned lace was sewn over a black silk t-shirt. The neck line dipped into a low V, just between the slight beginning swells of my breasts; it would've been an uncomfortable amount of skin exposure if not for the scalloped lace trim, rising just far enough to reduce the slut level from a seven to about a three. The sleeves were short, making my arms look long and graceful. How wonderfully deceiving, I thought with a wry grin. The corset top hugged my waist, making the gentle indentation there appear amazingly small, and embroidered lengths of ribbon outlined the bust, as well as marked the torso. A grey and blue bow rested just between my breasts, excess lengths of satin from the knot falling gently down over my stomach. A tiny expanse of flesh was exposed between the end of the shirt and the beginning of my jeans, but it was obscured slightly by the lace hem as well.

The jeans were kind of silly. I mean, they were relatively normal blue jeans, but they were torn. Alice had assured me they were supposed to be this way, with the slightly frayed hems and the small holes just underneath the pocket on the right hip and thigh. They weren't enough to actually expose any skin, covered by the white threads indicating wear and tear, but it seemed kind of ridiculous to me to pay…I glanced at the tag, my heart stuttering slightly. Two hundred dollars?! Two hundred dollars for a pair of ripped jeans? I gasped softly and shook my head.

"This is too expensive!"

Alice rolled her eyes, exactly the reaction I'd been expecting and gave me a light nudge back toward the dressing room.

"We're getting it. No arguments, you look hot!"

Rosalie nodded her agreement, smiling, "All the boys won't even be looking at me and Alice come Monday."

I rolled my eyes. The day guys stopped looking at Rose was the day that Emmett danced ballet.

I slipped out of the outfit, changing back into my own clothing. Could I sneak these back onto the shelf when Alice wasn't looking? As I pushed the changing room door back open, all hope was lost as she whisked the clothes right out of my hands.

"Alice, really, this stuff is so pricey." I glanced around the small Seattle boutique with a frown.

"Bella, the jeans you're wearing now cost more than the ones I'm holding."

I gasped, feeling somehow betrayed as I stared down at the comfy pants in horror.

"What?!"

She nodded with a knowing smile.

"Uh-huh. So you may as well just relax, breathe for heaven's sake, and enjoy yourself. Do you honestly think after all these years we haven't accumulated more money than we possibly know what to do with? Especially with my particular gift?" She arched a brow, grinning slightly and I just shook my head, taking a slow breath.

She was right, I knew she was right, but I don't know that I'd ever be comfortable spending 'their' money.

I must've spoken aloud because Alice suddenly laughed.

"Bella, it's not ourmoney, it's _our_ money," she made a wide circle with her fingertip, including me in it.

I frowned. "I didn't earn any of it."

She sighed in exasperation, ushering me toward a few racks of hoodies. "You're part of our family! Now just calm yourself, and buy something. It always makes me feel better, and I know how much you like these…_things_." She gestured to the sweatshirts like they were something disgusting, which to her, they probably were.

She danced away before I could argue, either about the money or the comfortable tops I preferred, and I grumbled beneath my breath before reluctantly thumbing through the selection.

One in particular caught my attention and I pulled it free from the others, glancing around. I somehow felt guilty for this. For shopping with money that I had absolutely no right to.

But it was so cute. A white hooded sweatshirt with a coy looking black Siamese cat, outlined in pink wearing a pearl necklace. Further inspection revealed two small white cat ears on the hood. Oh, guilty pleasures!

I absently touched my pocket, which held my ID and bank card.

"Don't look at the price tag, if it makes you feel better," Rose suggested, peering over my shoulder with a grin.

I jumped, my hand flying to my throat. "Don't do that," I breathed, trying to sound stern.

She chuckled. "Sorry. Just trying to help."

"Trying to help me spend your money?"

She looked thoroughly exasperated, as if my words were nonsense; some other language she could barely understand.

"Bella, why would I put it in your account if I didn't want you to have it?"

I had no good response, so I stayed quiet.

"Do you consider yourself a Cullen, Bella?" she suddenly, quietly asked.

My eyes widened and I glanced to her in surprise, shocked at her question. The answer left my lips, immediately, requiring absolutely no thought. "Of course!"

She smiled indulgently, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and tugging me against her side. "Then start acting like it, sweetie. When it comes to finances what belongs to one of us belongs to all." She paused, laughing lightly. "Except for the cars, of course."

I couldn't help but chuckle in response. "Of course."

"Are you going to get that then?" she asked, gesturing to the shirt in my hand.

I looked up into her eyes for a moment. They were dark today, a sort of bronze hue, yet despite her thirst I saw nothing else that hinted at the carefully leashed demon within her. Her gaze was knowing, amused, loving, accepting.

I nodded once, decisively. "Yes, I'm going to get it."

She grinned, mussing my hair. "Good girl."

I ended up picking out two other shirts, a gray tank and a navy sweater, and even chose another pair of jeans. Alice was practically beside herself, hovering over me, watching my every move. Her oohs and ahhs, and the occasional "that'd look great with your eyes/hair/skin color" were just really starting to get to me, the urge to swat her like a gnat causing my hand to itch, when she suddenly switched gears on me.

"So you're really going to wow everybody at the new school this year, huh? Buying all this new stuff." She held a hideous neon pink plaid tank top against her torso, before thankfully replacing it. Even _I_ knew better than that.

I shrugged in response. "I suppose. I guess I wasn't really thinking much about everybody else. Just picking out what I like."

She nodded, unerringly finding the equally hideous matching skirt to the top she'd just put back. "No Lynda Cummings this year at least." She suddenly looked up at me, her expression far more serious than I'd seen it in some time.

I swallowed, looking away quickly as I shoved a pair of khaki pants back onto the rack. Lynda Cummings had been the most popular girl in Philomath High School. She'd also been my unequivocal tormentor. Of all the girls, of all the students in general, she had been the most eager to make my life miserable. And had she ever succeeded. I could still remember crying in one of the bathroom stalls after she'd cut a big chunk of my hair off, seated behind me as she had been in Algebra.

But Alice couldn't possibly know about that. I'd been very careful to keep my thoughts hidden, made certain she had no reason to _look _for such things.

I cleared my throat, glancing back up warily. "Uh…Yeah. She wasn't too pleasant." There we go, keep it light. No specifics. It was a well known fact that Lynda was a bitch. Nothing unusual about reiterating the truth.

Alice nodded, somehow having managed to capture both the ugly skirt and top, and was holding the outfit up. I quickly reached out and pushed them down, shaking my head. "No."

"No?" She looked so disappointed that I almost relented, but I just couldn't let her walk around in that.

"No," I repeated.

She sighed and re-racked the items.

"Anyway. You know one time I had this vision…" Oh, this couldn't be any kind of good. "Lynda tripped you in the cafeteria and you had to wear everything that was on your tray all day. It was funny, because it couldn't possibly be true, right, because you would've told us about that, _right_? The funny part, get this, is you came home that afternoon, covered in lasagna surprise, claiming you'd fallen. Everyone believed it of course, because we all know how your feet tend to misbehave."

Oh yeah. Really not good.

"Or this other vision, where Lynda told everyone in school that you were a guy. Or the time she cut your hair. Oh and what about that time she locked you in the bathroom from the outside and you missed all of your classes? Or when she told everyone the only way you got A's was by sleeping with the teachers. And of course…"

"Okay!" I gasped, interrupting her. All of the references to the humiliations of my high school career were causing a sudden tightness in my chest.

She wrapped her cool arm around me, pulling me close, her voice sad, "Bella, why didn't you ask us for help?"

The emotions she'd invoked with her sudden attack were overwhelming. Poignant sorrow for the miserable suffering I'd been forced to endure. Unjustified anger that Alice knew and she hadn't done anything. Relief that I was finally going to be able to talk about this.

I shrugged helplessly. "What could you have done? Really? Was Carlisle going to speak to the principal? We all know how that would've turned out. The bullying would've been ten times worse. Maybe Emmett could've dealt with it? Because a single blow of his fist wouldn't have just crushed Lynda's skull to dust?" The idea held far more appeal than it should've, and I forced it out of my mind. "Or Edward could've examined her mind for her deepest secrets and I could've revealed them to everyone? Made her as miserable as she made me? It sucked, but it's just…a part of growing up, I guess."

Alice was aghast at my excuse. "Part of growing up? Bella, no one, no one at all, should ever have to suffer like that! It's a public institution for learning, not a place for horrible excuses for humans like Lynda to take their aggression out on people they don't like!"

"I…I guess you're right," I agreed weakly.

"I am!" she declared firmly. "And this year, I want you to come to me immediately if anyone so much as looks at you wrong."

I laughed, shaking my head, "Alice…"

She grabbed my shoulders with her small, but incredibly strong hands, and turned me slightly until we were face to face. Her expression was fierce, and for the first time, I saw a sliver of what I'd seen in Edward, in her.

"I'm serious, Bella. I will not have you suffering because of us."

"It's not your faul…"

"Bella, please. Do you think we don't know what people say about us? How they at once love and hate us? How they are envious, yet utterly oblivious to how very lucky they are that we don't attempt to befriend them? You're a Cullen. Though they know you're somehow different, your difference doesn't make you immune to their misplaced animosity. Just promise me, alright?"

I nodded. "Alright, Alice, I promise."

She pulled me close and hugged me tightly, suddenly, and I uttered a tiny squeak as she squeezed just a little too hard. She stepped back with a bashful grin.

"Sorry."

I chuckled, rubbing my ribs lightly. "S'alright."

Her sunny disposition reappeared without so much as a how-d'ya-do and she tipped her head, grinning impishly. "You sure I can't pull of that little pink number?"

I laughed, tugging her toward the register, lest she become too tempted. "Trust me on this one, Ali."

Of course, Alice being Alice, the outfit was in her bags when we left.

* * *

When we got home, I ignored Edward and Emmett, who'd been waiting at the door, both apologizing profusely, and headed straight up to my room to put my clothes away. I couldn't stay angry with them forever, of course, but that didn't mean I couldn't make them suffer just a little for what they'd put me through.

I was hanging my new pants, still marveling at the fact that we'd paid two hundred dollars for a pair of ripped jeans, when there was a knock at my door. I turned slightly, puzzled. Definitely not Emmett, and probably not Edward. The two of them usually didn't bother to knock. Apparently because they could hear my every move, heck my every heartbeat, it meant that I didn't appreciate the illusion of privacy.

I turned back to the closet, calling over the music I had playing, a jazz CD Carlisle had suggested, "Come in!"

The door clicked. It took me a few seconds to realize that no one had spoken. I glanced over my shoulder. Speaking of jazz…

Jasper was sprawled across my bed, feet tapping lightly against the footboard in time with the music. His hands were laced behind his head and he stared up at my canopy as though it were actually interesting.

I closed my closet door and went to sit on the edge of the bed. "What's up?"

He slanted me a glance. "How'd the shopping go?"

I shrugged. "As well as could be expected." He arched a brow in response and I chuckled. "Better than usual, anyway. I actually found a couple things that I liked."

He nodded absently, and I had the distinct feeling that he hadn't come up here just to ask about our trip into Seattle. I reclined against my pillows, settling in with a sigh. "What's really up?"

He pushed himself up until we were at eye level with one another, sighing heavily. "Sorry I wasn't more help this afternoon."

Ah. He was feeling guilty was he? Despite my earlier anger, some of it misdirected at him, I knew he really didn't have any reason to be feeling bad. What was he supposed to do?

I shrugged. "It's alright. I felt about as bad for you as I did for me, considering all the emotions we were throwing your way."

"I guess." He wasn't buying into my easy way out.

I leaned over slightly, taking his hand and lacing my fingers with his. He stared at our joined hands for a second, before returning his gaze to mine. "Seriously, it was just a good thing you were there so they didn't rip each other apart. All in the name of bad eighties music."

He chuckled softly, some of the tension in his face easing. I smiled, laying my head on his shoulder. His sigh ruffled my hair, and I felt his chin land gently on the top of my head.

"Will you let me make it up to you at least?"

I pulled away, eyeing him suspiciously. "Jasper Cullen Hale, don't you dare try to buy me anything. One car that I can't drive is enough, thank you very much."

At this, he laughed; a loud, sudden burst of sound that had me grinning it was so contagious.

"Ah, Bella." He wrapped his arm around my shoulders, squeezing me lightly. "No buying of anything ridiculous, I promise."

"Alright," I hedged. "What then?"

"Well, I already have something in mind, but I'd kinda like to keep it a surprise. Would you mind?"

Oh, the many things that could go wrong with my agreeing to that question, and yet I did. I nodded slightly, the corners of my lips pulling up into a tiny grin. Not that he had anything to make up for, really, but I enjoyed spending time with him.

"Great!" he exclaimed enthusiastically, suddenly pulling me into his arms.

For a second my mind swam, slipping into dream mode, and I tensed, half expecting his lips to come crashing down onto mine at any second. That's certainly how Dream Jasper would be making things up to me.

Of course, I was being an idiot, and he simply leapt from the bed, racing out the door and down the stairs. He'd tucked me into my new car, clicked my seatbelt into place, and had us out on the road in a matter of seconds.

"Not wasting any time, huh?" I breathed, my puny human brain trying to catch up.

He laughed. "Nope."

I wanted to ask where we were headed, but I'd agreed to allow him this surprise, so I kept quiet and watched the trees flying by, occasionally sneaking glances at Jasper from the corner of my eye. He really was quite attractive, I realized not for the first time. From his tousled blonde hair, to his amber eyes, the strong line of his jaw…

He must have caught me staring, because he suddenly turned to face me, a bemused smile playing on his lips. "What?"

A brilliant blush belied my hasty, "Nothing," and I turned to stare determinedly out the window. No more of that.

He didn't push the issue, and all too soon he was pulling to the side of the road. I glanced forward in surprise. Where…?

The same stretch of abandoned road from this morning's fiasco met my gaze and I felt an immediate wave of panic. I glanced at Jasper wide-eyed even as I felt his answering calm forcing my anxiety to retreat.

"Jasper, what? No!"

He smiled, nodding. "Yep."

"You're making it up to me by taking me back to the scene of the crime?!"

"Crime, huh?" his voice sounded far too amused for my liking.

"Yes! Edward and Emmett murdered any will I had to learn to drive. Death? Crime!" I exclaimed dramatically.

Jasper rolled his eyes, and I felt his tranquility redouble its presence.

Despite my unwillingness, I relented to the lull of his gift, falling back against the seat.

"I can't do this, Jasper," I uttered pathetically.

"Of course you can, Bella. Humans learn to drive all the time."

"Okay, I don't want to do this, then."

He reached over, tipping my chin so that I faced him. He smiled lazily, and my heart paused briefly, before staggering to a hurried start once more. "But, you will."

My frown was mutinous. "I won't."

I knew he wouldn't dare Dazzle me any further than that criminal smile, not after how angry he'd been at Edward for daring to do so. I hadn't really anticipated that he had any other tricks up his sleeve.

He nodded dejectedly, as though admitting defeat, just before reaching over suddenly to heft me out of my seat, as easily as if I weighed ten pounds rather than one hundred and ten. He pushed his seat back slightly in the same second, settling me between his legs before I had a chance to so much as blink.

I struggled briefly in a vain attempt to return to my own seat, my futile actions subdued within a matter of moments by a terribly unfair combination of Jasper's gift and the strength of his hands. Resting back against him, I muttered petulantly, "Cheater."

"Never said I played fair, darlin'," he murmured, his cool lips just barely touching my ear.

Wow, no he sure _didn't. _

My breath caught, and I closed my eyes briefly, hating that I couldn't control my response to that slight touch, lethally combined with the familiar endearment. I waged a brief inner struggle for composure, wondering how much Jasper could sense from my body language alone. Thank goodness he had no access to my head, because I might just die of mortification if anyone other than me was in there right now. It really didn't help that I was wedged so snugly in my lap, my bottom resting right against… My face flamed briefly and I refused to finish the thought. God, my dreams were turning me into some sex crazed monster! Also known as a hormone-riddled seventeen year old girl, I thought self-deprecatingly. I inched forward on the wide leather seat, wanting just a little space to try and reign my wayward body back in.

Of course, sweet oblivious Jasper just had to go and make things worse. His arm wrapped around my torso, just beneath my breasts, and he pulled me back against him, no doubt thinking I was trying to escape. I froze, barely daring to breathe as my back came flush in contact with every muscled plane of his chest. This was like, my own personal Hell on Earth. Learning to drive while unknowingly being tortured by Jasper. Any faith I had in karma sure was fading fast.

We sat like that for several seconds, before he seemed to pick up that something wasn't right. I felt his cheek brush the side of my neck as he asked softly, far too close to my ear, "You alright?"

I desperately tried to keep my voice steady when I spoke, and failed spectacularly. Thankfully my agitated state didn't seem to effect my brain's ability to come up with tiny white lies. "Yeah," I breathed. "Just, Alice hugged me kinda rough this afternoon, and I'm a little sore."

My words had the desired effect as he immediately released his hold on my waist, and I breathed a quiet sigh of relief, scooting forward slightly.

My reprieve was short lived.

Jasper leaned back suddenly, and I felt his fingers on the hem of my shirt, just a moment before they began pushing it up.

"Hey!" I gasped. Say hello to Jasper from my dreams.

He shot me an exasperated look, "Shush, I just want to make sure there's no damage."

Of course that's what he was doing. What did I _think_ he was doing? I silently repeated over and over that the question was definitely not 'What did I hope he'd been doing'.

I shivered lightly as the cool night air bathed my suddenly exposed skin. Jasper's fingertips glided up my side and my heart raced wildly in response, a crimson blush warming my cheeks.

Did he feel absolutely nothing at all to be touching me so intimately? Was this just a doctor/patient thing for him? What did he even see when he looked at me like this?

"Doesn't look too bad," he diagnosed. "Just a couple of bruises."

I winced slightly, as a small ache made itself known beneath Jasper's prodding hands. "Ow," I complained softly.

He looked up, concerned. "I'm sorry, did I hurt you?"

I nodded, staring into his worried eyes, "Only a little, it's okay."

He frowned, obviously not satisfied with my response. He lifted me slightly, leaning down as he did so, and I died.

Okay, I didn't die, but I felt like I might when his cold, firm lips brushed the tiny expanse of skin that he'd been poking at. My fingers clenched into tight fists, the only restraint I could think of to refrain from burying my hands in his hair and holding him right there.

I felt something in my stomach demanding my attention, a faint fluttering sort of throb. Stupid butterflies always waking up when Jasper was around.

As he dusted another small kiss to my side, I knew I had to stop him, or I was going to do something stupid that'd make us both uncomfortable. Swallowing softly, I found enough of my voice to whisper, "Jasper?"

"Hmm?" he inquired, looking up from his task.

Our eyes met, and I knew my gaze was far too intense, but I couldn't seem to control my responses at all.

He read everything that he needed to without my so much as having to speak a word, thank the deity of your choice.

"Oh," he murmured, hastily releasing the edge of my shirt, letting it drop back into place as he drew back.

Though a tiny, selfish part of me hated to say it, I quickly uttered the necessary words. "You know, I think maybe you should sit in the passenger's seat, Jas."

He nodded quickly, easing out from under me in a matter of seconds and reappearing in the seat next to mine just as swiftly.

He cleared his throat, and I had a feeling he was about to apologize. I held up my hand, flushing faintly at the realization that it shook slightly. "No, don't. Just. Teach me, okay?"

I smiled tentatively, and he nodded.

"Alright, hands on the wheel and look down." I wrapped my hands around the steering wheel, before following the direction of his gaze as he peered between my feet. Two pedals sat ominously on the floor before me.

"The gas pedal is the one on the right. The brake is on the left."

As I focused more on his instruction, and less on his presence, I found myself better able to concentrate.

"So, do I put my right foot on the gas, left on the brake?"

"No. You definitely don't want to do that."

He leaned forward suddenly, his fingers closing around my left leg, just above the knee, but slightly below thigh territory. He gave a light nudge, forcing my left foot away from the pedals.

Okay, he was obviously trying to kill me. His touch, if it was just a little higher…I squeezed my eyes closed against the images as I suddenly became very acutely aware of the low throb of my pulse in every single portion of my anatomy.

He was talking, and I tried to tune into the words.

"…pretend like this one's on vacation. It gets to do nothing for a while." He chuckled. "Until Rose teaches you how to drive a manual anyway."

Even the prospect of learning to drive stick under Rosalie's scrutiny couldn't shake me free.

"Jasper?" I muttered.

He glanced up from his positioning of my feet, frowning thoughtfully, I imagined at the tone of my voice.

"Yeah, I'm actually going to need you to stay on _that_ side of the car." My blush was practically enough to incapacitate me, but those words just really needed to be said.

His lips parted and I interrupted the inevitable question. "Don't…Ask me why. Just, please."

He watched me for several seconds, every single one dragging on as though it were an hour. I didn't know what he was looking for, or if he found the answer he sought, but he suddenly nodded slightly, pulling away.

If I trusted my mind at the moment, which I didn't in the slightest, I would've sworn that I felt his fingertips lightly trace the inseam of my jeans up my thigh before drawing away.

I allowed myself a few moments to regain some semblance of self-control, before smiling and declaring,

"Alright. Left foot on holiday. What now?"

Another probing look, before he took his cue from me and reverted to normalcy. "Take a look over here."

He proceeded to teach me the parts of the car necessary to actually operating it. Thankfully, he refrained from trying to explain what was under the hood and how it worked. That was about where he'd lose me.

Windshield wipers, gear shift, headlights, mirrors…When I wasn't being yelled at, bossed around or generally annoyed it actually didn't seem so bad. Thankfully, whatever emotion that had practically charged the air between Jasper and I earlier had faded as well.

And he was right, people did this all the time. People that were a lot dumber than me.

I could totally do this.

My courage faltered slightly as he actually asked, "Okay, ready to do this?"

"What?" I squeaked, feeling that incredible panic rising once more. "Now?"

He laughed, shaking his head. "What'd you think, you'd just learn about driving and never have to do it?"

At least he wouldn't die if I managed to somehow crash and burn on this trial run.

"Well, I guess…I don't know! Do you think I'm ready?" My eyes were pleading. I wasn't sure if I wanted him to say yes or no.

"Only one way to find out," he declared, gesturing toward the key in the ignition.

I started the car, my tension rising as the low rumble of the engine met my ears. My fingers clenched into white knuckled fists around the wheel.

"Okay, what now?" I choked out.

He laughed softly. "First, you need to calm down. You're going to give yourself a heart attack."

I felt the presence of his gift, and didn't fight it.

"More," I sighed softly, closing my eyes.

Rather than the tranquility strengthening, it began to fade slightly.

I frowned, blinking my eyes open. "Jasper, what's…?"

He was staring at me, his eyes almost copper in the fading light, his expression odd.

"What?"

"Shhh."

I shushed obediently.

Several minutes ticked by, and finally, I felt the gentle waves of calm spreading over me.

"Thanks," I murmured, still slightly curious about what had just happened.

He nodded. "Foot on the brake, put the car into drive."

No time to panic, I did as he instructed.

"Good, Bella. Now take your foot off the brake."

Oh God, here goes. I slid my foot slowly off of the pedal that ensured safety.

We began to roll forward slightly, and I made a tiny noise in the back of my throat.

"You're alright," he encouraged. "We're barely moving. Put on the brake and see how quickly we stop."

I stomped on the brake and the car lurched to a halt. I was pretty sure my seat belt was going to leave marks.

He laughed. "Okay, no need to stop so forcefully, but good."

I blushed. "Sorry."

"It's alright. Try it again."

I let the car roll forward, before easing my foot back onto the brake. We came to an immediate, but less harsh stop.

I felt a small boost of confidence. This wasn't that hard.

"Now let's try the gas. Don't do what you did with the brake, a lot of people do these jerky types of accelerations because they give the car too much gas at first. Just steady, even pressure."

I dropped my foot onto the pedal and we began moving forward. Five, ten, thirty miles per hour.

I was doing it!

"There's a stop sign ahead," he murmured.

My panic was squashed like an insignificant little bug as his calm washed over me.

The car rolled to an easy stop at the sign in question, and I gave an excited little bounce.

"Great, Bella! Do you want to drive home?"

My immediate thought was to say no. Endanger other people on the road? Yeah, not a good idea.

But we _did_ kinda live in the middle of no where. Not too many others drove around back there And the practice would be good, right?

"Yeah, I do," I decided firmly, nodding.

"Good. I was going to make you anyway."

I laughed, turning to stick my tongue out at him, and he pinched the end of it lightly.

"Brat."

"Right back at you," I declared cheerfully.

It felt good, this easy back and forth that we were _supposed_ to have.

"Alright, Mr. Driving Instructor, which way?"

The idea of memorizing all of the roads necessary to get around was slightly daunting, but we lived in a pretty small town, so it couldn't really be too hard.

He directed me back to the house, where every single member of my family was sitting on the front porch.

Of course. Alice.

I put the car in park in the driveway, leaping out (remembering the whole seatbelt thing this time) and squealing, "I did it!"

Emmett had me on his shoulders in the blink of an eye, cheering, while Carlisle rubbed my back affectionately. Esme clasped her hands together, smiling as though she were about to cry, proclaiming, "Oh congratulations honey, I knew you could do it!"

"Thanks to Jasper!" I had to give credit where it was due.

He looked slightly embarrassed, rubbing the back of his neck and toeing the ground. I half expected him to say 'Aw shucks' with that posture.

"Bella did all the real work," he argued instead.

I rolled my eyes snorting, just a second before my stomach gave a loud, grumbling complaint. One glass of juice for a day full of excitement just didn't cut it.

Esme sprang into action. "Let's get you something to eat, sweetheart." She rushed into the house.

Emmett tugged me down from his shoulders, tossing me lightly into the air, much to Edward and Rose's horror, and I shrieked with laughter. He caught me easily, as I knew he would, before setting me on the ground. He ruffled my hair, "Way to go kiddo."

I grinned. "Thanks, Em. You and me, Top Gun theme song. Tomorrow?" I knew that I'd made some great strides toward learning to drive today, but I was going to need some practice if I was going to be ready for my test on Sunday.

"Hell yeah!" He tugged a lock of my hair before following Esme into the house.

I turned to Jasper with a little grin as everyone began filing into the house.

"Hey, really, Jas, thank you so much for making me do this."

He smiled, taking a step forward.

"Of course, Bella."

"Guess I just needed the right teacher."

He took another step closer, a long stride that brought him incredibly close. I felt my traitorous heart begin to beat that wild rhythm that seemed reserved specifically for him. I glanced up into his eyes. Did he have any idea what he did to me?

"I imagine you're right," he murmured. His hand rose, slowly, and he tentatively brushed the backs of his knuckles over the warm, rosy skin of my cheek. I couldn't stop from leaning into that touch if my life depended on it.

"Bella," he said quietly, and it sounded at once reproachful and pleading. I took a small, stumbling step back.

"Yeah, I'd better get inside, Esme will be beside herself if I don't eat something soon." I patted my stomach, smiling ruefully, wondering if he was buying the act, because all I wanted to do was get close to him again.

He hadn't moved, was staring at me. "Go," he whispered, and I knew that it was not a suggestion.

I turned heel and ran up the stairs.

I paused on the threshold of the front door, glancing over my shoulder. His gold eyes glinted in the dim light, boring right through me.

My retreat was hasty as I entered the house. I leaned against the door after I'd closed it, taking a deep, steadying breath.

What had I done?

* * *

**A/N: I would love some driving lessons from the delicious Jasper, or even the incredibly overbearing Edward. :P**

**I gotta tell you, it's tough not to write them too...excitingly if you will, at this early stage, because I just want to make them hop into bed!**

**Anywho, leave me a review if you liked it, and constructive criticism is always appreciated. Unless you're going to tell me I'm too wordy. Unfortunately, that aspect of things isn't going to change. :P**


	12. Interlude: Ordinary Angels

**A/N: So, I was going to post two mini-chapters, from Edward and Jasper's PoV, and then a full length chapter from Bella's. But my muse was determined to give Edward his own chapter, and she would not be denied. So this first interlude is Jasper PoV, with the following from Edward's. **

**I struggled like crazy with this one. So if it stinks, I'm sorry. Just grit your teeth and bear it, cause the next one is better promise. :D**

* * *

Calefaction

Interlude 3

Ordinary Angels

I was in trouble.

The kind of trouble that vampire speed, strength and smarts couldn't get me out of. In fact, they probably were only adding to my woes.

Now, what kind of trouble could a vampire possibly get into that they were unable to save themselves from? What kind of trouble would even register as more than a blip on the radar to an immortal being with a general immunity to all things harmful and the ability to turn humans into complacent vassals with nothing more than a smile?

How about the youngest, mortal member of said vampire's family falling head over heels in lust with him?

That might be troublesome.

Aside from Edward's unforgettable overreaction, I'd disregarded it when it'd first occurred; that subtle undercurrent of desire as I'd held Bella's feverish frame tightly to mine, cool water lapping over us. She'd been sick, delirious, and certainly couldn't be held accountable for whatever hallucinations had claimed her.

It'd been more difficult to justify from there.

There'd been the inconspicuous flow of confused desire, followed swiftly by further confusion and guilt at the stable when I'd attempted to position her properly for bareback riding. And her breath breaking on my name as she'd all but reenacted whatever she'd been dreaming about while I held her in her bed. The faint wave of longing as I'd murmured near her ear in the darkness of the garage.

I'd ceased any nighttime forays into her room to watch her sleep. The potent combination of her emotion and sleep-talking was simply overwhelming. I couldn't be certain that her nocturnal reactions were all in response to me, but if Edward's occasional morning frown was anything to go by, I had a fairly good idea.

With each incident I noticed less discomfiture on Bella's part. The contrition and mortification had begun to fade, begun to muddle the passion she'd portrayed less and less.

Take the incident in her car the other day. Her discomfort at my proximity had faded almost as quickly as it'd appeared. Melted into a slow, demanding need that burned through her and prompted an answering response in me. I'd behaved deplorably in response to her emotions. Allowed my lips to linger on the warmth of her fragrant skin, feigning innocence when she'd murmured my name. Barely resisted the feminine heat that beckoned as my fingers closed over the yielding flesh of her leg, the scrap of fabric between us infuriatingly substantial, yet tauntingly thin. Perhaps I'd wanted to test her resolve, or perhaps I was simply a terrible person, but I'd let my hand linger between her thighs, had traced the seam of her pants upward, drawing away at the last possible moment, barely able to conceal my groan at the reaction she'd transmitted.

And the way she'd closed her eyes and pleaded for more when I'd been attempting to calm her…

I briefly envisioned her beneath me, soft curls spread upon my pillow, her cheeks rosy, lips parted as she begged for more. But it wasn't the emotional influence that she asked for. No, she was pleading for release that she was certain only I could provide her, clinging to me with desperate strength.

Shaking my head swiftly, I dispelled the thoughts.

We were well passed propriety, but it didn't mean that we would be acting on these things anytime soon. Or anytime ever.

I could just imagine the nightmare of drama and fighting that would break out if Emmett found out. And much as we hadn't been getting on, it would be a stab in the back on Edward's behalf. I _did_ know his feelings for her after all.

Besides, I very much doubted that Bella wanted me. Truly wanted me for who and what I really was.

After all, I knew how humans perceived us. Every one of our physical attributes called to them, beckoned them in. The beauty, the melodic voice, even our scent; all of it existed to lure the mortals in. They were, after all, our natural prey.

I chuckled humorlessly, the thought giving me pause. Natural. A misnomer to be certain. There was nothing more unnatural than a walking corpse, relying on the blood of other beings to survive.

Humans knew we were different, instinctually realized that despite our perfection, or perhaps because of it, that we were not like them, that we were somehow wrong. And yet, they simply couldn't resist the curiosity that plagued them when faced with our kind.

Bella was not immune, much as it pained me to say.

And God help me, I wasn't completely unaffected when it came to her...charms. The quiet rush of blood as it infused her face, flushing her cheeks a delicate pink. The slight stagger of her heart when I was near, the rapid pulsing song it sang if I were to actually touch her. Her dark lashes fluttering lightly as she peered at me from the corner of her eye when she thought I wasn't looking.

The innocent desire she'd been spoon feeding me was almost unbearable.

But I hadn't confronted her.

I can't even begin to imagine what I'd have said.

Stop thinking about me? Stop dreaming about me? You've idealized me into something I'm not, and you obviously don't really want me because I'm a monster?

That'd have gone over well, I'm sure.

Besides, I wasn't even sure I believed that.

Bella _had_ seen us at our worst. One of us at least. The worst she could have possibly seen and lived to tell of. And she'd forgiven him. Far more easily than I can imagine any other mortal doing.

Perhaps she saw us better than we saw ourselves. She was willing to acknowledge both the good and the bad, while we tended to linger on our past misdeeds as some sort of definition for who we were.

And truth be told, as Bella's discomfort with her feelings toward me began to lessen, mine did as well. I couldn't deny that the lust permeating the closed confines of the car on Thursday hadn't been all hers. She provoked something in me that'd lain dormant for quite some time. Something that I told myself again I would not be pursue.

She was a teenage girl. How many times had I felt similar lust, directed at me and otherwise, from other humans her age?

Far too often.

This would pass. And I wouldn't be responsible for irreparable damage to our relationship by acting on these fleeting, fickle thoughts. I didn't really want to anyway, did I?

I sighed.

Of all Bella's choices for infatuation, I was definitely the worst.

Things would've certainly been less complicated, at least, if she'd begun to look at Edward the way she looked at me.

Something growled silently within at the thought.

No, I didn't really want that, did I? The idea of the two of them together made me want to break something. Preferably something expensive and irreplaceable. And if it belonged to Edward, all the better.

"Stop shoving, Emmett!" Alice's arioso voice had risen several octaves from its normal tenor and I grimaced as it pierced the broody bubble of my thoughts from down in the living room.

Shit. I was turning into Edward.

"Not my fault you're so damned tiny," Emmett responded.

I vaulted off my bed, refusing to think anymore on the subject when my mind was quite obviously made up. I slid downstairs on the railing, easily avoiding the newel post. Leaping over the back of the couch, sprawling comfortably on the wide, pale furnishing that had recently replaced the last one that'd been destroyed, I eyed the scene before me with skeptical amusement.

Thin plastic mats full of electronic bits and pieces were spread on the floor, and Alice and Emmett were stomping, whirling and generally flailing about in what can only be described as some terrible mockery of dancing. Music, and I use this term loosely, blared from the television's speakers; heavy, bass driven noise. In the background small, random sounds rang out; beeps, rings and trills, and the occasional obnoxious male voice shouting "Perfect!"

"Hear that Emmett, I'm perfect," Alice declared airily as the proclamation resounded throughout the living room.

Emmett snorted and gave her a shove. Anyone else would've gone flying at the push from that massive hand, especially if they were as tiny as Alice. As it was, she barely budged, sticking one little foot between his and nearly sending him sprawling.

"Cheater," he growled.

I refrained from mentioning that there had probably been a bit of that on both sides, lest Emmett challenge _me_ to, as he'd put it, 'The Championship Dance Off of the Century'. You wouldn't catch me dead... alive... undead?...well, you wouldn't catch me on one of those things. Besides, Emmett hadn't even been alive a century. I'd also decided it best not to point _that_ out.

"Takes one to know one!" Alice sing-songed, leaping deftly into the air before landing without so much as a whisper of sound. I bit back a laugh as Emmett copied the motion.

Vampires are graceful, it's just a given, and Emmett, despite his size, was no exception. He doesn't stumble over his own boat-like feet, and he knows just how much clearance is needed to accommodate his frame. But stick him next to Alice and he looks like a big, bumbling giant competing with an agile little elf.

He contradicted the thought; flipping backward, coming to rest on his hands, feet in the air, as he decided aloud, "That doesn't make any sense."

Alice frowned curiously, "What doesn't?"

Emmett righted himself, still tapping away. "'Takes one to know one.' It doesn't make sense. Are you implying that by my calling you a cheater, I myself am one? Because that's just not something you can apply to any situation. If I called Bella a human, would that make me one? Of course not. Or were you just saying that one has to exist in order for me to acknowledge it? In which case, it's a pretty simple, redundant statement, don't you think? Not even an insult, really."

I stared at him, a single brow arched. I was fairly certain Alice's expression mirrored my own. She'd even stopped her infernal jumping about. The AI audience had begun to boo.

He glanced between the two of us, grinning. "What?"

We were saved from attempting to graciously answer when the front door flew open, a wave of excitement preceding the actual appearance of the entrants.

A squeal rent the air, and Emmett raced to the foyer. I followed at a more sedate pace, smiling as I saw Bella clutching a yellow piece of paper as though it were a Nobel Prize.

"Got it!" she exclaimed, launching herself into Emmett's arms.

He laughed, engulfing her in a hug that all but made her disappear. "Of course you did! You're a Cullen!"

I wanted to remind Emmett that we generally succeeded at everything because we were supernatural beings relying on heightened senses, and Bella was a mortal, but it seemed rather callous, so I swallowed the words back.

Carlisle, Esme, Edward and Rose stood in the door's frame, all looking, and feeling, rather pleased and proud. There was a tiny rivulet of resentment flowing from the group, and I immediately pegged it on Edward. Sulky bastard was probably still moping about his failure at teaching.

His eyes narrowed on me and I cleared the air waves of offensive material.

"So, are you going to drive us tomorrow?" Emmett asked excitedly as we filed back into the living room amongst congratulatory remarks.

Rose glanced at the television, murmuring, "Oooh, DDR," before shooting Alice a challenging glance. The two began to play while Emmett, Bella safely ensconced in his embrace, threw himself onto the couch. It lurched backward, tipping onto its hind feet, balanced precariously between righting itself and falling, and I nudged it forward with a sigh.

Bella laughed, and I slid onto the couch beside them. Esme and Carlisle claimed the recliner and Edward folded himself onto the floor near Bella's feet.

"I dunno. My car's kinda…show-offy, don't you think? If we want to fit in, maybe we should take something a little less ostentatious?"

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Like what? Alice's Roadster or Rose's BMW?"

"No," Rose declared. "I don't trust those children not to damage my baby." She blanched slightly, turning to Bella with an almost bashful grin. "No offense, sweetie."

Bella just waved it away. "It's alright. I know that not everyone is as awesome a driver as me."

Edward chuckled, "Confident, are we?"

She nodded, her head brushing Emmett's chin. "Yup. I had a good teacher." She shot me a grin at this, and I couldn't help but smile in return. It was nice to see her feeling so self-empowered.

"I suppose I can take us tomorrow then. Guess it doesn't really matter, considering we're going to stand out no matter what," Bella relented with a shrug.

"What's your schedule look like?" I questioned, wanting to take her mind off our prescribed fate as outcasts. I recalled Carlisle having pulled some strings with the admissions office to ensure that at least one of us was placed in each of Bella's classes. Alice had remained tight-lipped on the subject, but there'd been talk of some bullying last year. The idea didn't sit well with me.

She thought for a second, before tapping her fingers as she rattled off her classes. "First is gym," she actually shuddered a little in disgust. "Civics, Biology, Spanish, Lit, Algebra, and Home ec."

I only had one class with her, then. Advanced Placement Literature. I was surprised to find that I was slightly disappointed. I probably just wanted some company to keep the inevitable boredom at bay.

That's what I told myself anyway.

"Jasper, how much longer do you think we'll have 'riding' weather?" she suddenly asked.

I frowned thoughtfully, glancing out the wide paned window overlooking the yard. Brilliantly hued leaves already littered the ground, beautiful in their dying throes, and Esme had recently started turning the heat on in the evenings, for Bella's sake. "Not too much longer," I replied truthfully, shaking my head. "Couple of weeks at most."

She sighed. "Dang."

The poor girl hated winter. Snow and ice weren't really too friendly for an uncoordinated person. Add to that the fact that we refrained from riding, for both horse and rider safety, and the season had a permanent place on Bella's shit list.

"Did you want to go a little bit later?" I offered consolingly. I didn't really imagine we'd have much time once school had started anyway. Well, considering she hadn't done the coursework twenty times, _she _wouldn't have the time.

She nodded happily, and Alice merrily abandoned her position on a plastic mat in light of a possible Bella Doll Dress Up opportunity. Emmett hurried to take her place, dumping his mortal companion in my lap. I chuckled softly as she curled up against me, as though she hadn't just exchanged arms like some misbegotten little puppy. She tucked her head neatly beneath my chin, her warm breath bathing my neck.

I tried to stop myself, decided it'd be prudent for all involved if I just kept that protective barrier up, shielding myself to the best of my ability from her emotions. But I didn't. My curiosity got the best of me, and I reached out, testing the waters as I wrapped my arms around her.

Contentment, a bit of weariness, and there…There it was. Minute. Nearly nonexistent. But there, nonetheless. A faint, buzzing whisper of desire. Was it in response to my presence? I knew I shouldn't want it to be, but irrationally, I did.

Unfortunately, I didn't get much time to examine its nuances, as Alice sighed dramatically, glanced at her invisible watch, and swiftly plucked Bella out of my hands.

"Girl time!" she declared, whisking Bella upstairs before I could so much as take a breath to protest.

Annoying little pixie.

* * *

Most of the ride to the stables was spent with Bella murmuring street names quietly to herself. She recited driving rules, sing songed mnemonic devices that I couldn't imagine why she recalled and created some of the most ridiculous acronyms I'd ever heard. Bbsid? Break before shifting into drive. Why not just remember the five words themselves?

I smiled, barely able to restrain myself from pointing this out as she whispered, "Hatat. Hands at ten and two." I quickly leaned in and turned on the radio.

"Where's your iPod?" I was pretty sure that calling most of what today's performers (I refused to call them artists) thrust upon us through the radio waves, 'music', was some type of criminal act, and I avoided it whenever possible. We didn't share identical musical tastes, but Bella's preferences were certainly better than this.

"Oh, I forgot that it even connected in here. Crazy new-fangled car."

I laughed. "You're not old enough to say new-fangled yet."

Her lower lip immediately went on the offensive, poking out lightly. "I'm not?"

I shook my head solemnly, reaching over to push that lip back into place. Bella playfully nipped at my finger, obviously forgetting that were she to attempt to bite me, she'd probably break her teeth. I pulled my hand away quickly. "Nope. Minimum age limit of sixty."

"Sixty?! Well, that's just ridiculous."

"Hey, I don't make the rules."

She slanted me an amused, disbelieving glance. "Oh no?"

"Nope. The council for…word usage and slang committee…team…does."

Her slender shoulders shook, but she managed to maintain a straight face. "I see, I see. I'll be sure to send them a petition to lower the age limit on new-fangled immediately."

"Good luck. They're a bunch of crotchety old bastards."

She looked at me, grinning. "Yeah, I believe that."

I chuckled, resisting the urge to lightly poke her in the side only because she was driving.

"Oh!" she suddenly exclaimed, leaning forward and pushing the small volume button.

"You have volume controls on the steering wheel, darlin'."

Her breath hitched, slightly, at my words, and I watched her curiously. Excitement over the idea of not having to reach for the stereo? I doubted it. Perhaps it was…No, I'd used that word a hundred times over. Against my better judgment, I decided I'd have to test my theory.

She pushed the small button near her thumb, and a quiet, pretty melody filled the car.

"I love this song," she declared with a smile. "I know you don't like pop music, but this is good."

"Yeah? Are you going to sing it for me?"

Bella had a gorgeous singing voice. She denied it up and down, refused to share her gift with anyone but her family, but it was the truth. It was perhaps the one thing she could claim to do as well as any of us, aside from sleeping, which she excelled at. She could hit nearly any note, save for the very lowest bass, and each and every one rang with a clear sincerity. When she sang she was able to provoke emotion nearly as well as I could.

It really was a shame that she hated crowds so much, she was quite amazing.

She ducked her head slightly, and I could feel the heat of her blush even with the few feet separating us.

"My voice isn't nearly good enough…"

I scoffed. "It's gorgeous."

She glanced at me with a small smile, and a curious emotion reached me. It wasn't the sudden surge of desire that she usually sent my way. It was certainly some type of want, but a gentle, effervescent sort of feeling that slowly wound its way around me, before pulling tight. I frowned.

Bella didn't notice, training her eyes back on the road as the woman on the radio began to sing. Her lips parted on a quiet breath before she commanded my attention wholly with the quiet strains of the first verse.

"_Remember those walls I built, well baby they're tumbling down. And they didn't even put up a fight, they didn't even make a sound. I found a way to let you in, but I never really had a doubt. Standing in the light of your halo, I've got my angel now. It's like I've been awakened. Every rule I had you breaking. It's the risk that I'm taking. I ain't never gonna shut you out."_

Bella sang the lyrics with a quiet reverence, an octave higher than the musician. I stared at her silently, opening myself up to her emotion when I noted the almost pained expression she wore. An aching sense of longing hit me. It increased as she broke into the chorus.

"_Everywhere I'm looking now, I'm surrounded by your embrace. Baby, I can see your halo, you know you're my saving grace. You're everything I need and more, it's written all over your face. Baby, I can feel your halo, pray it won't fade away."_

She became silent as the singer went into a round of unnecessary repetition of the word halo. She sighed gently and I wanted to ask her what was wrong, but I didn't want to interrupt whatever cathartic event I was witnessing.

"_Hit me like a ray of sun, burning through my darkest night. You're the only one that I want, think I'm addicted to your light. Swore I'd never fall again, but this don't even feel like falling. Gravity can't forget to pull me back to the ground again."_

The refrain began and she suddenly looked at me; wide, innocent eyes that touched upon every feature of my face before coming to rest on mine. I wanted to look away from that probing gaze, but I was 'Dazzled' by her sudden brilliant smile.

"You know, I thought you were an angel when I was a kid," she murmured quietly. "Pale, and beautiful and good." She seemed to lose herself briefly in her thoughts, before she shook her head, and turned the music down.

"Guess you know better now?" I asked, not completely unserious.

She glanced at me once more, a tiny, knowing smile on her lips. "Hmm," she hummed in response, before turning away and effectively closing the subject.

Shit.

I was in trouble.

* * *

**A/N: You are indeed, dear Jasper. You are indeed. Continue on for a tasty Eddy chapter! But not before hitting that little green button and letting me know what you think!**

**The song referenced in this chapter is Halo, by Beyonce. I own nothing. I make no money. You know the drill.**


	13. Firsts

**A/N: Shorter than normal, but this was supposed to be less than 4k words, as it was going to be a mini-chapter, rather than a regular one, but, meh. What can you do?**

**Chapter 10 is Edward PoV.**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 10

Firsts

"Alice, _please_, it looks _fine_!" Bella's exasperated, weary exclamation resounded through the house. I chuckled, glancing at the clock. It was the fourth time those very words had been spoken in the past twenty five minutes. Poor Bella. She obviously didn't understand the fury that was Typhoon Alice when she got into 'First Day Fashion' mode. She'd spent a half hour on my hair alone, swearing up and down that if I didn't wear the outfit she'd laid out for me, right down to the shoelaces, she'd make me pay.

Denying Alice her clothing-related demands was akin to smearing yourself with honey and running through Grizzly infested woods. It simply wasn't done.

"Bella, if you don't sit still, I swear to God, I will tell Emmett every attempt any boy will ever make to talk to you," Alice hissed tightly.

The sound of Bella's fragile human teeth gritting would've been some cause for alarm, if Alice's threat hadn't sunk its icy little talons straight into the irrational portion of my mind in charge of jealousy and injected it with enough bile to swell it to ten times its normal size.

I was flinging the bedroom door open before Bella could draw a breath to argue.

"What boys?" I demanded, taking in the scene before me with mild disbelief. Bella had assured me that she and Alice already had her first day outfit picked out. Yet it would appear that every piece of clothing that had ever resided in her closet was strewn about the room. The dresser was open, brightly colored scraps of fabric hanging limply from its drawers. Typhoon Alice indeed.

"_Not now, Edward_," the two growled in unison, both glaring at my reflection in the vanity in front of which Bella was seated, Alice standing behind her.

I gingerly stepped over a small mountain of what appeared to be socks before throwing myself onto the unmade bed. Residual heat from Bella's body still lingered and I sighed, allowing the sweet, citrus scent of her to wash over me.

"Watch your hair, Edward," Alice suddenly snapped.

I rolled my eyes. "I thought it was supposed to look mussed." I don't know why I bothered; it was going to be futile.

"Yes, it's supposed to look 'just got out of bed' disheveled, not 'I haven't combed my hair in months' messy!"

"But I am in a bed," I argued reasonably. "Wouldn't it make the most sense if...?"

"Edward, don't _taunt_ her!" Bella suddenly pleaded, and I noticed Alice's little hand tightening around the brush she was holding, until she was brandishing it almost like a weapon. Well...for Bella's sake... I propped my head carefully in my hands, watching the two of them.

Alice's brain was filled with constantly changing images of our first month in school. From what I could see, regardless of how it happened, things were going to be fairly similar to how they'd always been. The first week they'd watch us, the following they'd attempt to make contact, and eventually, they'd give up and label us freaks. If only they knew the half of it.

Bella's mind was still slightly hazy with sleep. Images from her latest dream danced on the edges of her consciousness (I astutely avoided those), while her main focus circled around pleasing Alice and whether or not Gym class was going to be completely awful.

It was, I'd seen, but I wasn't about to tell her that.

"Alice, seriously. It looks fine! Ask Edward!"

Alice shot me a contemptuous glance. "Like he'd know," she muttered scathingly. She was just a vicious little thing this morning.

Regardless of her insult, I glanced at Bella in the mirror.

She did look fine. She looked better than fine. She looked amazing.

Soft chocolate eyes were outlined in a dark, earthy color, and her lashes were particularly thick and long, hiding her gaze as her lids lowered tiredly. Her pale countenance was like alabaster satin, flawless, save for a tiny spot of gentle pink marking each of her cheeks. Her coral lips were glossy and full, and I felt a peculiar tightening somewhere low in my abdomen as the tip of her tongue swept out, trailing along her lower lip slowly. I hastily looked away even as Alice uttered, "Bella! Lip Gloss?"

Bella uttered a mock sob and shook her head. "Alice, this is torture. I did not get out of bed an hour and a half early to be yelled at by you! Now calm down or I'm going to kick you out, bet or no bet!"

Alice's golden eyes narrowed and she placed her hands on her hips. "I'd just like to see you try."

Bella stood abruptly, pushing the small padded vanity bench back so quickly that it toppled onto its side. She whirled to face her torturer.

Alice was thinking that the left side of Bella's hair needed more straightening. Bella was envisioning picking Alice up bodily and throwing her out the door. I found both trains of thought equally amusing.

"Alice, you may be faster than me, and you may be stronger than me, but you had better believe that I am _not_ above calling Esme up here."

Alice seemed momentarily taken aback. I followed the course of her thoughts as she imagined Esme appearing. She seemed to think she could sway our mother in her favor. She suddenly leaned in with a grin, both brows rising. "Do it, I dare you."

Bella took a deep breath, and I could almost hear the build-up of the single word in her throat.

I quickly interfered, leaping between them, hands out in supplication "Okay. We don't really want to start our first day like this, do we? Bella you look lovely, and Alice you're doing a great job making her look lovely. So let's just finish up so we can get...going..." My eyes were suddenly drawn to Bella's apparel, the outfit having previously been out shadowed by their argument. The warm expanse of skin just above her heart held my gaze. That...well that was just completely inappropriate! No one (but me) should be allowed such access to her charms! "What the hell is _that_?!" I spluttered.

"Oh God, here we go," Alice grumbled, righting the bench with her foot and guiding Bella back to a seated position by her shoulders. Bella watched me curiously in the mirror, her lips twitching.

"What the hell is what?" she queried innocently. As if she didn't know.

"That! What is that..._thing_ you're wearing?!"

Alice smoothed the straightener through Bella's hair, replying boredly, "It's a shirt, Edward."

"A shirt? Oh, I don't think so. Shirts cover people, not expose them. That is...a disgraceful excuse for a proper piece of clothing!"

Bella giggled. She giggled!

"You're not wearing that," I declared staunchly.

They exchanged a glance. Bella thought my fiercely protective behavior was ridiculous, overbearing and just slightly cute. Alice's thoughts were directed right at me.

_Keep it up, you idiot, and you're going to push her completely beyond your grasp._

I frowned. Not what I was going for. I just didn't want any stupid, adolescent children panting over her and making her uncomfortable! It was all in her best interest.

Wasn't it?

Perhaps my intent was slightly selfish. _I_ didn't want others seeing her that way. Bella deserved to be told that she looked as beautiful as she was.

I sighed defeatedly. "Emmett's not going to like it."

"He doesn't have to like it," Alice replied tartly.

"Who doesn't have to like what?" a voice belonging to the vampire in question queried from the door.

Alice sprayed a few squirts of something fruity around the base of Bella's neck. "You." She touched up Bella's lip gloss. "Don't have to." Finally she pulled Bella to her feet, turning her to face Emmett. "Like this. Get it out now, Emmett, she's not changing."

Emmett stared at Bella quietly for a second. His eyes moved over her smooth, silken locks, over her made up face, down her fruity neck, and over her first day outfit. I noticed her jeans were ripped. I tensed in preparation for the inevitable explosion.

"Why would she change?" Emmett asked calmly.

I felt betrayed, felt I needed to explain to him exactly why he should be one of the biggest proponents for a wardrobe update. "Why would she change?! Why would she change?! Don't you see this?!" I asked, gesturing at the bust of the shirt.

Bella flushed, swatting my hands away, "Edward!"

"Or this?!" I reached out, tugging the lace hem up and exposing a small strip of skin between her jeans and the shirt. Her skin was warm beneath my touch, and her thoughts became slightly incoherent as my knuckles grazed her hip. Something I'd have liked to examine if I weren't so agitated.

Emmett shrugged. "That's pretty tame. Don't you think you're overreacting? I mean look at what Alice is wearing."

"Overreacting?!" I parroted, glancing at Alice's outfit. The jeans she wore rested quite low on her hips, revealing the slight indents marking her hip bones. A too-tight t-shirt came to an end just above her navel, an even smaller zip up pullover completing the ensemble. But that was Alice! Alice could show as much skin as she wanted. Bella should be covered up!

"Yeah, Edward, overreacting," the object of my thoughts declared, pushing my hands out of her personal space.

"Fine, don't come crying to me when the idiot boys are panting all over her."

Bella laughed. "Good! I'm seventeen years old and never had a boyfriend, Edward! I want guys to pay attention to me!"

Emmett's growl and mine echoed at precisely the same moment.

"Ugh, whatever. I can't even talk to you when you're like this. Let's go Alice," Bella grumbled, taking Alice by the hand and leading her from the room.

"Well thanks for the help, Emmett," I declared when they'd descended the staircase.

"Huh?" he asked curiously, glancing at me.

"Never mind," I sighed. For all of his protective instincts, he was quite oblivious.

"Women, huh?" he asked, shaking his head.

"Women," I agreed wearily.

* * *

And so it started.

Just as it always did.

As Bella pulled into the school parking lot, driving as though she'd been doing it for years and not just a few days (I still found it hard to believe that Jasper'd been able to get through to her when I couldn't), the thoughts I picked up on became increasingly Cullen-centric.

_Who's that?_

_I wonder if they're movie stars!_

_Look at that car!_

It was exponentially worse as we'd made our way across school grounds.

_Wow! They're hot! Are they related?!_

_I heard they're weird, I mean look how pale they are. Looks like they haven't slept in days._

_Are those Dr. Cullen's kids? Must be. Look at that girl. She seems kinda...different._

I saw our images reflected in nearly every mind as we passed. We made for an odd, attractive bunch. I had to reluctantly admit that Alice had chosen each of our first impression outfits well.

Emmett was the quintessential jock; dark curly hair, easy carefree grin, and a musculature that already had girls panting. He was wearing a blue and green striped polo with the collar up, followed by a pair of khaki shorts and matching athletic shoes.

_Oh. My. God! Look at that guy! He's adorable! I wonder if he has a girlfriend._ Typical.

A single, silent high pitched squeal. Yawn.

Jasper strode beside Alice, laughing quietly. I kept a close eye on both his and Alice's minds, wondering if he would be alright in the presence of so many humans. He didn't seem particularly bothered, and I felt a small flash of relief. Despite the plain attire of a white t-shirt, a black hooded sweatshirt, unzipped, and a pair of jeans, the thoughts of many of these girls had taken a sudden turn straight into the gutter, and it'd be only too easy for him to lure one of them away.

_Oooh! What a cute little Southern drawl! He's gorgeous! _

A rather explicit image of Jasper and a busty blonde bent over teacher's desk. How unoriginal.

Alice had chosen a typically Alice outfit for herself. Enough skin to draw a bit of attention, and also enough to remind any guy that thought to approach that she was so out of their league as to not even be playing the same game. Her jeans clung to her slender legs, hugged the slight swell of her hips. Her shirt left little to the imagination, though if I were to be brutally honest, there wasn't a whole lot there to begin with. Thank God she couldn't read _my_ mind.

_Look at the girl! She's so graceful. It's like every step she takes is part of some intricate dance. I wish I moved like that._

_Oooh! Damn, she's hot! I need to get me some of that. Unless that big guy's her boyfriend..._

I glanced down at myself. Having Alice dress me wasn't too different than dressing myself. I wasn't quite as obsessed with shoe laces as she was...but all the same. A gray v-neck collared shirt, over a white oxford, striped with thin lines of blue and navy. She'd laid a red tie out as well, something I didn't normally wear, but I'd tucked it into the overshirt, pushing my sleeves to mid-forearm at her request. A pair of dark khakis completed the ensemble.

_Mmm...that guy...I could just eat him up._

I almost laughed. If only she knew.

_Well isn't he attractive? He probably knows it too. He's probably an asshole. Jerk._

No snap judgment there or anything. It was a shame I'd probably end up proving her right.

I held the door to the main office open for my siblings, glancing at the congregation that'd gathered to watch our approach, refusing to meet any of their eyes.

Several colorful thoughts regarding Bella reached me, and I felt my control falter slightly. I took a slow, deep breath, willing my beast back to sleep. People's ideas were certainly more varied when it came to the mortal Cullen.

_What are they doing hanging out with _her_? They're like super models and she's like, a catalogue model or something._

So she's pretty enough to be a model, just not quite up to our standards? The pettiness of mortals was constantly astounding. Besides, that person was a complete fool if they thought we outshone Bella in any way.

_Hm. She's pretty. I wonder if she'll be in any of my classes._

I glanced up in surprise, looking for the source of the thoughts. A young looking boy, all blonde hair and bright blue eyes was watching us from within a small ring of students. He had an earnest, open face, but despite his innocuous thoughts and pleasant enough demeanor, I felt an instant dislike for him.

The crowd reluctantly dispersed as a cold drizzle began to fall, and I let the door swing shut behind me.

The cheerful woman behind the desk handed us our schedules, and a small map with the location of all of the buildings, as if we'd need them, and encouraged us to have a good day.

I ushered everyone back out, Emmett and Bella engaged in lively conversation, Jas and Alice pushing each other, and a lone, quiet voice penetrated the incessant clamor that seemed intent on driving me crazy.

_Hm. Look at that. I wonder if they're family. They don't look anything alike. They must just be good friends. Are they new, like me? Judging by the ridiculous gossip, I'm guessing so. At least they've got each other..._

The thoughts weren't tinged with any emotion. No self-pity. No sadness. They were just a matter of fact assessment. I peered at the mortal whose mental voice had so singularly invaded my mind.

A tiny red head, perhaps even smaller than Alice, was sitting on the ground beneath an overhang on one of the buildings. She held a battered book close to her face, peering at us curiously over its edge. At least she was polite enough not to stare at us outright.

Alice was beside me suddenly, watching the girl as well. Her eyes went blank for several seconds. A frown tugged at her lips as she came back to herself.

"Edward?" she murmured.

I glanced at her curiously. "Hmm?"

"What's she thinking?"

_I wonder why they're looking at me. Maybe they know that I'm new as well? If I have some classes with them, perhaps we can commiserate on the horrors of the first day at a new school. Especially in a town like this. I figure most people know more about me than I do. Hopefully they don't know too much..._

I relayed the thoughts, verbatim for Alice, who pursed her lips.

"Edward, she's important."

I arched a brow, slanting her a significant look. Jasper, Emmett and Bella were already heading for their first classes. "What do you _mean_, important, Alice?"

She retreated into her mind, and I followed. There was the girl, laughing with Emmett, clinging to his back like a child. Playfully plucking a pawn from the chessboard when Jasper wasn't looking and slyly handing it to Alice. Eating pizza with Bella…at our dining room table? What the hell? There was a brief flash of something more, something smeared brightly through with a red haze. Something incredibly sinister.

"What was that?!" I demanded, grasping Alice's shoulders and shaking her lightly. "Rewind it!"

She shoved me away in frustration. "Rewind it, Edward? It's not a movie, I can't just replay the visions at will! I don't know _what_ that was! I don't know _who_ she is, and I don't know _why_ she's suddenly here." She tapped the side of her head, clarifying just where she meant.

I peered at the human from the corner of my eye. She was tucking her book into her backpack, her mind humming something random. She seemed blissfully unaware of Alice and my sudden distress.

"Perhaps Bella befriends her?" I mused quietly. It seemed the most logical course for such things to follow.

Alice sighed, shaking her head. "I thought that as well, but it just doesn't feel right. There's something more. We need to keep an eye on her."

I nodded. "Alright, I'll let the others know."

"No. Don't tell the others. Not yet."

Hm. An odd request.

"Why?"

She shook her head. "I just have this feeling that we shouldn't. Something's going to happen…" She clutched her head as though she were in pain.

"Alice?" I murmured concernedly.

She flashed me a slight grin, relaxing. "Just trust me on this one."

I glanced back to the spot where the girl had been sitting, but she was gone.

"Alright, Alice. If you say so."

* * *

I followed the progress of Bella's first two classes by flitting between her, Emmett and Alice's minds. I was still slightly shaken up by Alice's incredibly strange vision, but whatever would come to pass seemed to hinge on decisions that I had no control over, and as such, I couldn't bring myself to fret much.

C'est la vie.

Gym class went as terribly for the poor girl as it could have. Coach Clapp was not of a mind that the first day of Physical Education was for getting to know you. It was for physical education.

Right off the bat he brought out several big rubber balls, diving the class into two teams. Unfortunately, Emmett and Bella were not on the same team.

"Dodgeball!" Coach Clapp had declared, and as I waited for something more on the subject, I realized he felt that was all that needed to be said.

Bella fell twice, elbowed a girl in the face hard enough to give her a bloody nose (poor Emmett), and actually managed to puncture one of the balls. It got to a point where she headed for the 'out' corner without even having been hit by one of the balls. It really was better for all involved.

Emmett couldn't help but show off, destroying the other team and promptly embarrassing Bella by breaking into dance. I chuckled as she silently wished for an injury that would ensure she never had to come back to gym class again.

I really was quite lucky for my gift, and the fifty some years of formal education I'd attended. I didn't need to pay much attention to my lessons. It was the same boring crap, intoned in the same boring voices, from the same boring personalities.

"Excuse me?"

I glanced up as a nasal, feminine voice intruded on my Bella spying. I arched a brow in response.

"Hi, yeah. I was just wondering if I could borrow a pencil. See, mine broke." _Nevermind the fact that I have about twenty more in my backpack. I just needed an excuse to talk to this guy! I wonder if Jessica has seen him yet. He's completely drool-worthy._

I stared at her impassively, unimpressed with her insipid thoughts. She fidgeted when I offered no response.

_Did I say something wrong? Why is he looking at me like that?_

"Lauren, is it?" I finally questioned quietly, recalling the name from attendance.

_Oh my god! He knows my name! Shit! Why didn't I pay attention to his?!_ "Um, yeah. And you are?"

"That's not really important, Lauren. Let's just get this out of the way. I'm not going to go out with you. In fact, I'm not even remotely interested. I don't want to be your friend, or your acquaintance and I certainly don't want to be some kind of trophy for you to parade around in front of your undoubtedly plebeian friends." I offered her a dangerous flash of white teeth, before holding out a pencil. "Here you are."

_What an asshole! Who the hell does he think he is? I wasn't going to ask him out! I'm way too good for him! Like he's God's gift or something…_

Her cheeks assumed an unattractive shade of maroon, before she ripped the pencil out of my hand and turned back to face the front.

Well, that ought to get the message out that I wasn't here looking for friends. Girls like that were quick to gossip.

The bell rang and I darted out of the classroom, uttering an exclamation of surprise as I nearly took the waiting pixie to the floor. I halted mere centimeters in front of her, scowling.

"Jesus, Alice, what are you doing?"

"She's in your next class. Find out about her."

And just like that she turned and walked away. I glared at her retreating back. Why the hell did I have to do it? I sulked all the way to my next class.

When I arrived at the Trigonometry classroom, she was already there, again with her nose buried in that tattered old book. Closer inspection revealed a worn copy of Little Birds, by Anais Nin. I was mildly shocked. Not only by the choice, but by the fact that she didn't seem bothered to be reading a book of erotic short stories in public.

She glanced up when I slid into the seat beside her, offering a slight grin.

I hesitantly smiled in response. Ugh, Alice had to be kidding. I hadn't attempted to hold an honest conversation with a human in years.

"Hey," I hedged awkwardly.

She blinked, glancing around briefly as though she thought I were speaking to someone else, before dog-earing her page and looking up at me.

"Hello," she responded politely. Her voice was slightly lower than I expected. By no means masculine, but of a pitch that seemed inaccurate in comparison to her tiny frame.

"Good book." God, I was lame.

She chuckled, glancing at the cover. "I'm pretty fond of it."

I nodded, having no clue where to go from here.

"Edward Cullen, right?" she asked with a smile, taking pity on me for my obvious lack of social skill. She held out her hand formally, and I debated for just a second, before shaking it lightly.

She didn't comment on the temperature of my skin.

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

She chuckled, looking mildly bashful. Her mind was blissfully free of any thoughts of what she'd like to do to me if she could just get me alone. She wasn't thinking much of anything. Other than she was enjoying our conversation. "Trust me, you don't want to know."

I smiled, surprised to find that it came easily. "Try me."

She tucked a stray crimson curl behind her ear, and I realized with a shock that she was actually quite pretty. She was certainly no Bella, but with her delicate, elfin features, and her brilliant green eyes, she wasn't terrible to look at.

"Well," she reluctantly said, her lips twitching as she suppressed a grin. "I was in the ladies room, when a rather furious blonde came storming in. Laura? Linda?"

"Lauren?" I asked, laughing in spite of myself.

"Yes! That's her. Well, she and a group of equally stupid looking girls came in, and she started going on and on about how this new guy, Edward Cullen, the one with the messy auburn hair and a jaw that could cut glass, was a complete ass and seemed to be socially retarded. The insults got rather extreme from there. I honestly thought she might be having a fit of Turret's."

I chuckled, enjoying the girl's quick wit and easy-going personality.

"Anyway. There are only a few of us side-show freaks known as the new kids, and last I checked you were the only one who matched that description. So my deduction was nothing short of genius, on level with Sherlock Holmes." She shrugged, as if to say she simply couldn't help but be so smart, and I smirked.

"Elementary, my dear Watson?" I offered.

She grinned. "Lysandra, actually. Lysandra Jenkins."

"What an odd name," I blurted, cringing as I realized how rude it must have sounded. While I'd been more than happy to drive Lauren away, I was supposed to be getting to know this girl.

But she just nodded, sighing dramatically. "Don't I know it. It was my parents' revenge for me not being a boy."

I plucked an image from her mind, two marble headstones, side by side, and had to remind myself that it was not at all acceptable to offer her my condolences based on what I'd 'seen'.

I was saved from any potential slip-ups as the teacher called the class to order.

I sought Alice's mind, watching as she taught Bella how to intricately fold a note into any shape imaginable. A house, a swan, an octopus? Alice and I were going to have to have a talk about distracting Bella from her studies.

The rest of the class period passed uneventfully, and I didn't have much of a chance to talk to Lysandra again. She offered me a smile, a wave and a "Nice to meet you," as the bell rang, and she filed out.

At least I wasn't going back to Alice empty handed.

I was expecting her this time when I exited the classroom.

"Well?" she demanded.

I shot her a glance. "First of all, you don't send me on reconnaissance missions like that. I am very good at keeping them away. Not so much with the whole 'holding a polite conversation' bit."

She rolled her eyes. "Fine."

"But, I did find out a few things. Her name is Lysandra Jenkins."

"Lysandra?" Alice echoed.

"I know, even more strange than our old fashioned names, hm?"

She nodded.

I continued as we strode out of the building. "She's new here, and her parents are dead."

Alice seemed appalled. "You managed to bring up the topic of her dead parents in your first conversation?!"

"No! I read it. What do you think I am?" I scoffed.

"I have it on good authority that you are quite socially inept, actually."

"Lauren Mallory?"

She nodded, giving me a lop-sided grin. I answered with one of my own. Obviously I'd chosen the fastest possible route for giving myself a bad name.

"I didn't find much else out. She seems nice. Has good taste in literature. Intelligent."

Alice nodded absently. "I'll have at least one class with her today, so I'll find out what I can."

"Keep me up to date?"

She nodded, and we parted ways. I had Biology with Bella this period, and I was anticipating seeing her. Because I hadn't just seen her less than two hours ago.

I was such a love-sick fool.

She waved me over with a smile as I entered the building. I felt an acute pang in the vicinity of my still heart as I gazed upon her beautiful face. Walking over, I took the stool next to her, lightly tugging a strand of her hair.

"How's the first day going?" I asked, though I knew the answer very well already.

She shrugged, doodling a small design in her notebook. "Aside from the humiliation of gym class and the pointed stares and whispers?"

I laughed, "Yeah, aside from those things."

"Just dandy!"

I shook my head at her sarcasm. "Well now that you're partnered with the most knowledgeable science student in this place, I'm sure that things are bound to get better."

"Oh, I'm sure," she replied with a sage nod.

We were going to be covering a lot of things that Bella and I were already well versed on, and we ignored the teacher as he went over the syllabus, playing hangman on a spare sheet of paper. Perhaps it would be hypocritical of me to chastise Alice…

I briefly envisioned using the game to profess my love, but decided that was possibly the furthest from romantic I would ever achieve.

I did, however, inform her, at the risk of a stick character's life, that she looked quite beautiful today. She blushed, scoffing, though answered with the thought that I looked rather nice as well.

She then proceeded to silently question what I had done to so furiously piss of Ms. Mallory. She and Alice must've had class with the girl last period. I swiftly wrote the story out in her notebook, much to a combination of chagrin and amusement on Bella's part.

_Edward, you know it's okay to be friends with humans,_ she thought bemusedly.

I wrote my response on a sheet of paper.

_She wanted to be much more than friends, love._

The endearment added itself without my permission, but if Bella noticed, she did an admirable job keeping it from her thoughts. Rather than continuing the conversation in her mind, she scrawled her response beneath mine.

**So, you dont have to be friends with Lauren. There are lots of others.**

_To be honest, I'm not particularly interested. It wouldn't be fair for me to embark upon a relationship where, not only may I be unable to hold up my end, but I'm a threat to the company I keep._

She pondered that briefly, before nodding.

**I guess youre right But it must be hard, being alone all the time.**

_I have my family._

**Dont you ever want more?**

_No._

She scowled at my response.

**Who is it that you loved?**

I stared at the question, surprised. What had made her even think of this? Should I tell her? I hesitated, gathering my courage, before setting my pen to the paper, and scrawling hurriedly,

_You._

I regretted it the moment it was so damningly displayed before us.

She huffed, glaring.

**You know what I mean. Not me and Alice and Emmett. Who did you LOVE?**

I couldn't believe my luck. She didn't believe me? She misunderstood? I almost laughed in relief. What had I been thinking?

I was saved from having answer as the teacher suddenly called,

"Ms. Cullen. Why don't you stand up and introduce yourself?"

Her mind grew agitated and I heard her silently mutter,

_For goodness sake, what does this have to do with science. I hate this. All these people staring…_

"Sure," she said, falsely cheerful. "I'm Bella Cullen, I just moved here from Oregon…"

The thoughts of our classmates swirled around me, jealousy, attraction, curiosity. I frowned, closing my eyes against the sudden cacophony.

Bella slid back into place, pink cheeked as she finished her impromptu speech. Mr. Banner promptly called on me and I got to my feet, mind swirling with my emotions for Bella, the sudden appearance of mystery girl, and a thought from a student in the back row who'd already decided he was going to ask Bella to the prom.

Sighing lightly, I shook my head.

It was going to be a long year.

* * *

**A/N: Poor Edward! And who is this new character? You'll have to keep reading to find out!**


	14. Demons, Auras and Vampires Oh My!

**A/N: Nothin much to say here. I had a little trouble with this chapter, but it came out alright, I think...**

**Thank you for all of the lovely, wonderful, amazing reviews! They seriously make me giggle like a little kid. :P**

**Chapter 11 is Bella PoV**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 11

Demons, Auras and Vampires…Oh my!

"So, what's up with Alice?"

I glanced up from perfecting my octagon note-folding technique at Emmett's murmured question to Edward. Though five minutes had passed since the bell rang, our Spanish teacher, Senora Gomez, was conspicuously absent, and I couldn't see the harm in a little extra-curricular activity until she arrived. A tennis ball whizzed past, perilously close to my face, and I grimaced, though Edward easily leaned in and caught it before tossing it in the garbage, ignoring the chagrined "Hey!" of the ball's owner. Apparently I wasn't the only one taking advantage of the unexpected free time.

Edward, in the desk to my left, shifted slightly, a thoughtful expression momentarily crossing his handsome face. His shoulders rose and fell in an unconvincing shrug. "What do you mean?"

I looked at Emmett, sitting in front of me, though currently facing the aisle. He rolled his eyes at Edward's obviously intentional perplexity. "I mean what's. Up. With. Alice?" He didn't elaborate.

Aside from my impish older sister's morning fashion insanity, I hadn't noticed anything too out of the ordinary, and I'd just seen her a little over an hour ago. Of course, preoccupation with my own first day jitters probably didn't make me the most observant person. I watched Edward curiously.

He absently rubbed the back of his neck, his eyes, dark today, shifting between the two of us. He sighed heavily, shaking his head, before leaning closer. Emmett and I did the same. When he spoke, Edward's voice was hurried, laced with concern. "Okay, Alice had a vision this morning. I told her I wouldn't inform anyone else, but I feel it's important, because it may concern the safety of our family. There's a human. A human girl. She's a student here, and Alice sees her in our future. The visions are hazy, but it appears almost as though we befriend her?" He sounded skeptical and I couldn't blame him. Even as the human member of the Cullen family, I could count the number of friends I'd made at school on one hand. Edward blew out a slow breath, and I felt slightly dizzy as the cool, sweet air bathed my face. He frowned and pulled back slightly, continuing, "There was something in particular, something near the end that has me worried. Other than avoiding this girl, I don't know that there are any preventative measures we can take, but if things progress according to Alice's vision, I don't believe it ends well. I can't tell if that's for her or us."

I stared at him, mouth agape. Questions, imaginings and possibilities all swirled through my mind, a wild, incoherent hurricane. Who was she? Why was she here? Could she be in some way involved with my sudden mystery illness? Had Edward or Alice confronted her?

Emmett easily cleared my mind as he asked a question whose answer could have been a million times worse than any of mine.

"Edward. Are you sure she's human? Could she be a Volturi member? Maybe they've finally heard about Carlisle's decision." He nodded slightly toward me, and I felt my stomach drop straight through my toes.

I'd known this was a possibility. We all had.

But when Carlisle had seated me in his study three years ago and explained vampire law and the Volturi, I had never actually believed it would happen. If they were to find out that I knew of their existence, but remained mortal... Well, I would definitely be getting my wish early. But I wouldn't want it, not like that. Not under threat of death, tainted by fear. I couldn't even wrap my mind around the idea of what would have happened if they'd found out when I was still a child.

Edward's warm, velvet voice dislodged the icy fingers of fear that had wrapped around my heart and were steadily squeezing. "She's definitely human." He smiled faintly at me, lightly taking my hand and rubbing my knuckles reassuringly. "The Volturi would never use a human for such a task." I nodded mutely, slowly rebounding from the incapacitating terror that had claimed me. "Though at least with the Volturi we would know what we are up against. This human...I don't know..."

"Have you met her?"

Edward nodded, his fingertips tracing small designs on my palm. I felt myself slowly relaxing against the uncomfortable wooden chair.

"Does she seem like a threat?"

I slanted Emmett a glance. He was definitely slipping into aggressive protector mode. His big hands clenched convulsively into tight fists, before relaxing, only to repeat the action several seconds later. His dark brows were furrowed into an angry grimace, and his topaz eyes held a hint of something feral.

Edward was silent for several seconds, perhaps assessing his answer. Finally, he reluctantly replied, "No. Not at all. She's Alice's size, maybe a little smaller even."

"What about up here?" Emmett tapped the side of his head.

"She's smart." Edward gave a start, as though he'd just thought of something. "Perhaps smart enough to have heard the legends and figured us out..."

Emmett muttered an expletive beneath his breath.

Edward hastily backpedaled. "But even if that were the case, there's no way she could know about my ability, and she wasn't thinking anything like that at all."

Emmett just shook his head. "Who is it?"

I squeezed Edward's hand lightly, curious as to the identity of this potential threat myself.

Edward faltered, before shaking his head. "Alice is going to have words with me for even telling you two as it is. I'd better not..."

Emmett's fist promptly tightened around his pencil until all that was left was dust. I blinked.

"Edward. Tell me."

"Yes, because I'm sure you'd show as much restraint with her as you did that poor writing utensil were I to disclose her name."

Emmett growled quietly, and I glanced around furtively, hoping no one had heard. Luckily, everyone seemed more than happy to engage in loud, raucous behavior with the teacher's absence, and other than the occasional curious glance, we seemed to be of little interest.

"I have a right to know," Emmett insisted.

Edward was saved from answering as our dark-haired Spanish teacher finally arrived, launching right into a, "Buenos dias mis estudiantes! Lo siento que soy tarde..."

I missed the explanation as to why she was late, retreating into my own thoughts.

Why hadn't Alice wanted us to know about this mysterious new threat? Was she even really a threat? Perhaps _we_ were the threat to_ her_. After all, look at how Emmett had reacted... And though I'd never seen it firsthand, I'd heard that Jasper wasn't exactly known for his amazing self-control.

But who was she, and what did she want? Did she know about us? Was she going to find out? Was she just a normal, everyday person, coming into this blind?

I resolved that this was a discussion that we would definitely be having at lunch.

"Senorita Cullen?"

I looked up, pasting a smile in place. "Si, Senora Gomez?"

While I was a far cry from fluent in Spanish, certainly nowhere near as good as my siblings, who'd been practicing numerous languages for five times my life span, I was a fair hand at speaking and an even better one at understanding it.

"Por que no dice mejor le dices a la clase un poquito acerca de ti?"

Ugh. Could I tell the class a little bit about myself? You couldn't escape it! Not even in a class where you didn't know the language fully. I sighed. "En espanol?"

She smiled, nodding. "Por favor."

I stumbled through the obligatory retelling of who I was and what I did over the summer, the entire time wishing for a fault line somewhere to miraculously open up and swallow me whole, before taking my seat, willing my cheeks to resume a normal color.

After Emmett and Edward had each taken their turns, both unnecessarily showing off, and we'd chosen our Spanish names for the year, Emmett started right back in. I couldn't hear what was being said, it was either too quick or quiet, but I could tell by the look of consternation that continually creased Edward's brow, and the scowl that twisted Emmett's lips.

I had to admit, I was curious. I wanted to meet this girl. See what she was like. Find out what the fuss was.

Maybe tell her to stay the hell away from my family...

As class was winding down I glanced up from my doodling, having long since finished the assignment, to find Emmett grinning triumphantly. I quickly looked to Edward, who was frowning.

"Did you tell him?" I asked, quietly incredulous.

Edward shook his head, shooting Emmett a glare.

"Then what..."

"He told me what she looked like," Emmett declared, his smile widening.

He...told Emmett what she looked like? That didn't seem particularly helpful in a school populated by so many students.

Emmett seemed to read my thoughts from my expression.

"How many girls in this school do you think are smaller than Alice with flaming red hair?"

Ohhhh...

"Edward!" I admonished.

He shrugged helplessly. "I didn't think of it!"

Emmett was staring at the clock, already on the edge of his seat. Oh...this was going to be interesting. I quickly jammed my text book into my backpack, shoving my assignment in after it.

The very second the beginning trill of the bell sounded, Emmett was out of his seat. I was hot on his heels. I could feel Edward bringing up a close third.

We raced out of the building and I nearly ran into the solid wall of Emmett's back as he came to an abrupt halt, avoiding the collision only as Edward's hands closed over my hips, his fingers cool against that small bit of exposed skin. I drew a quick breath, my heart stuttering slightly.

"Alright?" he murmured near my ear.

I nodded mutely, mildly horrified by the traitorous, uncontrollable responses of my body. First Jasper, now Edward? Oh, this was not good.

I didn't have time to ponder this newest insanity as Emmett jogged across the parking lot, where I saw a small, red-haired girl standing against the side of one of the buildings, with her face buried in a book. I quickly dashed after them. He wouldn't do something rash would he?

"Would he?" I gasped to Edward, who kept pace with me.

He frowned. "We'd best follow, to be safe."

Emmett had just disappeared around the corner and I forced my legs faster. Edward's hand at my elbow reminded me that it wasn't the wisest idea for someone like me to be running across the slippery, wet ground, but I was counting on him to catch me if I fell.

"Always," he said with a smile.

I came to a skidding stop as we followed Emmett around the edge of the building.

"Emmett!" I exclaimed in horror, taking in the scene before me quickly.

Emmett had the poor, frightened looking girl trapped against the side of the building, a massive hand on either side of her head. She clutched her battered book to her chest as though it were some type of shield against Emmett's anger. His face was very near hers, his teeth bared, and I heard him growl softly, "Who are you?"

The girl shot me a pleading glance, and I couldn't help but be reminded of the night when Edward had nearly lost it. I took a step forward, only to have Edward stop me with a hand on my arm.

_What?! We need to stop him, he's terrifying her._

His murmur was low, "Perhaps we'll find something out..."

I was honestly appalled by his agreement with these mercenary tactics.

_No! Stop him right now!_

"Just give him a moment."

Seeing that she would be getting no help from our direction, the girl forced a tentative smile, holding her hand out slightly, "Um...Lysandra Jenkins? Nice to meet you?"

Emmett glared at the outstretched appendage until she pulled it back.

"Who are you?" he repeated quietly.

She shifted uncomfortably, trying to sink into the brick at her back.

"Well, I know I didn't give you my middle name, but that's only because it's one of those embarrassing, ridiculous sorts of..."

Emmett cut her off with a quiet growl, and I struggled against Edward's restraining grasp. He didn't budge.

The girl's spine seemed to straighten suddenly, however, and she actually took a step closer, until almost no space was left between the two of them.

"As I stated, my name is Lysandra. Who are _you_?"

"Emmett Cullen," he murmured. "Stay away from my family."

She blinked, apparently taken aback by that statement.

"I'm sorry, do you have a thing for Edward?" she asked innocently. "I mean, I know I was talking to him, but I really have no romantic interest..."

Emmett suddenly stepped forward, effectively shoving her against the building and pinning her there with his weight.

_Edward! Enough! Stop him before he hurts her._

I watched in horror as Emmett leaned in, breathing deeply as his face neared the girl's neck. She squirmed uncomfortably, pushing ineffectually at his broad chest.

_Oh my God! Edward! Please!_

I looked at his face, but he stared impassively at the scene unfolding.

Lysandra exhaled in surprise as Emmett's lips lightly brushed her throat. I could only gape. What...What was he doing? What about Rose? How had he gone from interrogation to making out? His eyes briefly shot toward Edward and me, and I noticed they'd gone completely black...Oh my God...

_He's going to bite her...Edward! _

He released me, taking a quick step forward just as Alice's sweet voice trilled,

"Emmett! _There_ you are!"

She came racing around the corner, swiftly taking Emmett by the arm and forcibly dragging him away.

Jasper was only a second behind. He came to a halt beside me, his hand resting on my lower back. I shivered lightly as his fingers stroke thed exposed skin there faintly. His eyes moved over my face concernedly.

"Are you alright?" he murmured.

I began to nod, but Edward cut me off, replying coolly, "She's fine."

They exchanged a glance, laden with something I couldn't begin to comprehend, before Jasper's thumb traced the tiny dimple just beneath the denim at my waist, and everything in my mind promptly scattered into mumbling incoherence. Edward uttered a quiet growl, taking a step forward, but Jasper simply turned away, smiling easily as he approached the confused girl, huddled in on herself against the wall. The warm pulse of tranquility he exuded washed over the area, dispelling the fear and confusion that had been dominant.

"Hello there, Lysandra is it?"

She blinked, her head turning slowly toward him. She nodded mutely.

"I wanted to apologize for my brother's behavior. He forgot to take his medication this morning, and we generally keep an eye on him," Jasper shot Edward a glare here, "but he got away from us. Are you alright?"

Again with the blinking. As though she thought she was just waking from an unbelievable dream. Poor girl. And having the surreal beauty of my vampire family around couldn't be helping.

"I...I think so..." she breathed, smiling hesitantly.

He nodded encouragingly. "Good. He didn't hurt you at all?" He purposefully slanted a surreptitious glance to her neck. I felt my stomach tighten with the idea that Emmett might have an unintentionally created a new vampire. The coils loosened at the look of relief that crossed Jasper's face.

"I don't think so, no. He just surprised me."

I stepped forward, thinking it'd be best if she had some actual _human_ interaction at this point.

"Like Jasper said," I nodded toward him, "I'm really sorry about that. I'm Bella, by the way."

She looked at me, and I half expected that appraising glance that I was usually on the receiving end of. The one that made me feel completely inferior to my family. But she simply met my gaze and nodded.

"Really, it's alright. I'm...I'm fine." She sounded slightly surprised, as though she couldn't believe it.

And with good reason.

My stomach rumbled quietly, reminding me of where we'd be if it weren't for Emmett's sudden misbehavior.

I took another step closer. "Want to go get some lunch?" I had a feeling that of any of us, I was the most likely to find out information about this mysterious new girl.

She moved away from Jasper quickly, no doubt sensing that, like Emmett, there was something she should fear from him, at least on some instinctive level.

"Sure, I'd like that." She hesitated, turning back to smile faintly at Jasper. "Hey thanks."

He nodded, smiling cordially.

I heard his voice, quiet and sharp as we headed in the direction of the cafeteria, presumably speaking to Edward.

"We need to talk."

I only hoped he'd proceed to yell at him half as much as I'd planned to.

* * *

"So, your brother's pretty scary," the wide-eyed redhead sitting across from me declared, taking a huge bite of her bagel. It was strange to be sitting with someone else that ate. Truth be told, it was kind of nice.

I hungrily shoveled a bite of salad into my mouth, laughing lightly as I washed it down with some lemonade. "Which one?"

She chuckled, wiping her fingers on her napkin. "Touché."

My smile faded as I watched her. Emmett's black gaze momentarily filled my mind and I realized she had absolutely no idea how much she'd really had to fear. For a split second I wondered if Carlisle couldn't be considered slightly irresponsible for allowing his 'children' to attend school like this, where almost anything at all seemed able to send even the most disciplined over the edge. I banished the thought as swiftly as I'd summoned it. They'd been doing this for years before my arrival. Who was I to question their self-control? I hurried to reassure my potential friend, "Yeah, Emmett definitely wasn't himself. I can't even begin to imagine what came over him." It was half true. While I understood the basic fundamentals that had caused Emmett to react as he had, I really _couldn't_ imagine what it must be like.

Shrugging lightly, she finished her bagel and started on an apple. "It's alright. It freaked me out a little bit, but I'm relatively unharmed."

"Relatively?" I echoed, hastily looking at her neck. Because my human vision would've been better than Jasper's, right?

She nodded, inattentive to my examination. "You know, emotional trauma, because my first day just hadn't been exciting enough."

I laughed. Now there, I could sympathize.

"Did you break someone's nose in gym class?" I countered bemusedly.

She looked up in surprise, obviously trying to suppress laughter, God bless her.

"I can't say that I did," she struggled, and I had to give her points for trying to let the subject drop, but only a few seconds elapsed before she exclaimed, "You actually _broke_ it?!"

I shook my head, grinning. "I don't think it was actually broken, but it may as well have been for all the blood."

She chuckled. "Yikes. It's not bad enough that we've got to be the subject on everyone's mind for being new, karma likes to toss a few extra challenges our way."

I saw my opportunity and decided to find out what I could. Subterfuge really wasn't my specialty, but I truly was curious about her, so perhaps this wouldn't require too much on the sneaky front.

"That's right, you're new too. How are you liking it so far?"

She smiled, glancing at the window briefly. "Oddly enough, I like the weather."

I snorted. "Weirdo."

"I know, I know," she held up her hands with a smile. "I don't know what it is, but I've always been fond of the rain. The town itself? Well, it's creepily small. Most of these kids have been going to school together for years now, and to get thrust into that, well; it's like swimming in a stagnant pond. New genetic material hasn't been introduced around here in a very long time." She grinned, and I couldn't help but do the same. "How about you?"

"Seems like we've always lived places where the sun didn't shine much," I admitted, hoping she wouldn't question it. "Though I'll be the first person you see outside when it does actually show up."

"With skin like that?" she asked, not unkindly.

"You're one to talk," I countered with a smile. I was surprised at how incredibly easy she was to talk to.

"Hey, I avoid the sun at all costs. I'm not trying to turn into one giant freckle."

I snickered. "Why the move to Forks?"

She grimaced slightly. "I live with my grandmother, and she grew up around here. Now that my grandfather's dead, she decided it was time to move back."

I wanted to ask, but I knew Esme would have my head if I actually blurted the question on the tip of my tongue. Lysandra took pity on me.

"They're dead, by the way." Her smile was only a little sad.

"I'm sorry," I murmured sincerely.

She shook her head. "It's alright. It's been a while now, so it's not as hard."

In that aspect I knew I was incredibly lucky. I lived with seven immortal beings. I would most likely never have to suffer such a loss.

"How?" I regretted it the second I'd whispered the question. Possibly just as thoughtless as the one I'd resisted asking.

She stiffened slightly, briefly, and I thought she was going to tell me to mind my own business. I wouldn't have blamed her at all if she had. Instead, her shoulders slumped slightly and she said, "They were camping. A trip I'd refused to go on thanks to my typically rebellious thirteen year old attitude problem." She sighed, pausing. I wanted to apologize for asking, tell her she needn't continue, but she suddenly spoke again. "They were mauled in their sleep." I shook my head in mute horror. "The police claimed it was a bear, the coroner said wolves. The only thing they could really agree on was that it was unusual behavior for the native wildlife. The bodies were barely recognizable. I wanted to believe that it wasn't them. It didn't look like them, so I could pretend, right?" She shook her head.

I could only stare. 'I'm sorry' seemed insultingly shallow for such a thing, but I uttered it anyway.

She tucked a stray hair behind her ear. "Like I said, it was a while ago. I just...It's not something I think you ever get over completely, you know?"

I didn't. I didn't know. I couldn't comprehend how such a tragedy had occurred in her life and yet here she sat, as normal as can be.

This girl, broken and re-pieced together was our potential threat?

I wasn't buying it.

Alice was wrong, or misunderstanding. I'd be sure to let her know my thoughts on the matter the very second I next saw her.

I hesitantly changed the subject. "What class have you got next?"

"AP Lit." She seemed relieved that I was steering clear of the previous topic.

"Hey, me too. And Jasper, I think."

She nodded. "The cute one with that little hint of Southern drawl?"

I felt a minor pang of something that I refused to name as jealousy. "Yup, that's the one."

"So, you guys can't possibly all be related by blood," she ventured.

I shook my head with a laugh. "Oh no. Carlisle and Esme, our parents, adopted us all. They're unable to have children themselves."

The look of confusion she'd been wearing eased. "I see. There are five of you then?"

"Six, actually. Rose is done with school already." The lies had been rehearsed and performed so often that I didn't even have to stop and think about them.

"Lucky her."

"I know."

"Jasper's the tall blonde, he's a senior. There's Alice, the teensy one that always looks like she's dancing. Edward, who I think you'd already met, is the sort of cocky looking one. And Emmett..."

"Is a fool for not having come over here to apologize already?" a lazy voice suggested. We both glanced up in surprise as Jasper approached. I hadn't even realized he'd come in. He slid silently into the seat next to Lysandra and I couldn't help but smile; she almost looked like a child sitting beside him. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

She smiled, shaking her head. "Not at all. Bella was just telling me a little bit about your family."

Jasper nodded, slanting a glance in my direction. I was expecting that pointed, "How much did you tell her?" look, but he just smiled. Something briefly danced to life in my stomach.

"Only good things, I hope."

I felt full and relaxed, particularly under Jasper's calming influence, and resting my chin in my palm, I watched the two of them almost sleepily.

She was staring at his face in that way that humans who were unaccustomed to their presence did; all wide eyes and smiles. Poor girl.

She managed to retain wits enough, at least, to respond cheekily, "Of course. Oh, except for that Jasper guy.

He sounds like a real jerk."

Jasper arched a brow, and because I was so open to his emotional influence, I felt a slight fluctuation in his. A small wave of bemused surprise. I didn't suppose he was used to being teased by humans. I laughed quietly in response.

"She's right about that, darlin'. It'd be in your best interest to stay away from him."

I stiffened slightly, a flash of irritation causing my eyes to narrow. The emotion snuck up on me so quickly that I didn't realize I'd planned to lean forward and glare in their direction until I'd actually done it. Jasper's look was startled as he suddenly turned toward me.

_Darlin'..._

_Darlin'..._

He was _not_ allowed to call anyone that but _me_!

The sudden possessive thought made me incredibly glad that Edward was no where in sight.

Realization that the words were on the tip of my tongue made me incredibly glad that Jasper was around to make me feel so lethargic.

I swatted the annoying feeling away with a frown.

Just because I was attracted to him did not mean I was going to turn into one of _those_ girls. I had absolutely no claim on him. He wasn't mine. I hadn't even told him how I felt. And I wasn't going to.

Besides, he wasn't interested in her. She was a human.

_So are you_, a small voice whispered cruelly in the back of my mind.

My thoughts were as irritating as gnats today. I silently hastened to justify just _why_ he wouldn't be interested.

She was a _random_ human. A potential lapse in judgment. A snack!

I was ashamed of myself even as the words formed.

Thankfully, I was saved from my acerbity as the warning bell rang. I quickly grabbed my bag and tray in one hand, promptly tripped standing up, and was righted by Lysandra's hand on my arm. She smiled. She had one of those rare, genuine smiles that you hardly ever see on people anymore. Which served to make me feel all the worse for my thoughts. Did she have to be so nice?

I took her wrist and quickly led her away from the table, amid feeble protestations that she didn't want to seem rude by just leaving our table companion without a word.

"He's in our next class, remember?" The words came out more testily than I'd have liked.

She looked at me then. Withdrew her hand from mine, stopped right in the middle of the school grounds, and turned to face me. I stared right back, tapping my foot as a gesture of impatience. Her eyes widened slightly, suddenly, and she grinned. I didn't like the look of that knowing grin.

"You…_like him!_" she suddenly exclaimed.

The sudden rush of blood to my head was enough to make me feel light headed.

"W..What?" I felt as though I'd been caught in the middle of some heinous crime and try as I might, I couldn't force the nonchalant chuckle I'd planned to use out of my tight throat. I shook my head.

She narrowed one eye, peering at me closely, and I had an eerie sense of déjà vu. She was looking at me like Edward did when he was rummaging around in my thoughts.

No way.

_Can you read minds?_ I thought the words clearly, concisely, and as loudly as my mental voice was capable of. Her expression didn't even twitch.

_Your shoes are hideous._ I went for something a bit more inflammatory. It was the meanest I could allow myself with this girl.

Again, she didn't even move.

Several seconds passed, before quite suddenly she blinked, the grin spreading across her face far too Cheshire.

"You _do_ like him."

Feeling at least slightly relieved, considering I wouldn't have to explain just what I'd meant by calling her a 'snack', I urged her toward the literature building.

"How do you figure?" I asked lightly. I _was_ curious. I hadn't thought that I was being blatant. Not that I even liked him! Just…hypothetically. Yes, all hypothetically.

"I don't really like to talk about it. It's kinda weird."

Unless she was going to tell me that she was some kind of super hero, I could probably handle it, I thought wryly. You know, even then, I don't think I'd be _that_ shocked.

"Try me."

She shifted her back to her other shoulder looking uncomfortable.

"I can see auras."

Well, that was…not at all what I was expecting. As we entered the building, I lowered my voice.

"Auras?"

She nodded, leading me toward the back. I didn't normally sit this far away, but I was definitely interested to hear more, and I could see why she wasn't overly eager to have others partake in this conversation.

"Yes. An outward manifestation of the health and status of our soul, as well as our emotion, normally invisible to the eye."

She was frowning slightly as she looked at me, and I was sure she was expecting me to refute her claim.

I slid into my seat, setting my backpack in the seat next to mine for Jasper, thinking. It wasn't _that_ far fetched. It made sense that whatever was going on inside of us escaped in some form. Plus, I lived with seven vampires.

Vampires.

"How do you read them?" I asked eagerly.

She sat down next to me, watching me suspiciously.

"You…believe me?"

I nodded. "Sure. There's a lot of weird, unexplainable stuff in this world."

She smiled. "You're an odd one, Bella."

I shrugged, chuckling. "I know."

"Well, each of our auras is composed of three parts." She scribbled a rough sketch in her notebook, ripping it out and handing it to me.

A stick figure was surrounded by three hazy outlines.

"The first section, the thin layer closest to the body, is the soul."

I arched a brow, glancing at her. The soul was outside of the body? There I grew skeptical.

"Sorry," she said, realizing her error. "I mean, this is the visual of the soul's consistency. This will tell you what really causes a person to tick. This is a constant, it does not change. It can, however, divide itself in two. When two people are so devoted to one another that they want to share everything about themselves that they can, even their soul, the soul sheds a small portion of itself and merges with the other. This will change the aura as the two combine. The bond is broken upon death, or loss of the other. Your soul will reject the foreign soul, even while desperately clinging to it, trying to stay complete. I've heard this is a very painful experience, emotionally enough to cause almost physical agony."

I stared at her, wide-eyed. "Do you get the other half of _your_ soul back?"

She shook her head.

"No. Your soul has to regenerate itself. This often takes years and years."

I nodded.

"Now, this second, thicker layer, I like to call it the fake aura. These are things that we've built up to protect that first layer. Most of these are superficial, though unfortunately, not easily changed. Beliefs, traditions. In a person whose soul has been fractured, this layer is particularly thick. Guarding what remains."

She sighed softly, before smiling.

"And this final, outward layer is the fleeting emotional aura. Swiftly transitioning, it's the most versatile of the auras, revealing surface level feelings."

I felt my bag land lightly beside my feet, and glanced up. Jasper smiled at me, that evil, lazy smile, and I just about melted. He peered over my shoulder at the paper, which Lysandra quickly plucked out of my hands and crumpled up. Poor girl. He'd probably seen and read everything before she'd so much as thought to take it away from me.

"Lys here was just telling me about auras," I said casually. She shot me a glare.

Jasper watched her quietly for a second, his head cocked to one side. A small fringe of blonde hair fell over his forehead, and my fingers nearly itched to push it away. I scowled, clenching my hands together in my lap.

"You're a reader?" he guessed.

She frowned mutinously, staring at the front.

"Hmmm," was all he said.

The entirety of class was spent with Lysandra alternatively glaring between me and Jasper. Jasper watched me intensely, or looked at my new friend curiously. And I just wanted her to tell me what she saw in my aura!

The second the bell rang, I shot out of my seat, taking Lys with me. Despite her anger, she didn't deny me. We walked swiftly toward a small cluster of buildings.

"Sorry about that, I didn't think he'd guess!" I sighed.

"It's alright. I just don't need the entire school calling me a freak. I've suffered that quite enough."

"He won't tell anyone." It was a lie, and I amended, "Other than the rest of my family."

She sighed, before glancing at me surreptitiously. "They're… different you know."

I tripped over my own feet, catching myself before I hit the ground. She didn't know…what they were, did she?

I nodded slowly. "I know." _How much do you?_

"They're not human," she declared, barely more than a whisper.

I felt my heart stop, before redoubling. The breath left my lungs in a silent, sudden rush. What was I supposed to say?! Deny it! Deny it Bella!

"Yes, they are," I managed to choke out, though we both knew that too much time had passed for that to be the truth.

"It's alright, you know. I'm not going to tell anyone. I don't even know what they are, really. I just know that their souls are stagnant. They're no longer regenerating, and if the aura is anything to go by, there's very little left of them. More in others. Emmett's is still quite substantial. Edward and Jasper's have dwindled," she shrugged, as though it didn't bother her at all. I wanted to shake her!

But a thought occurred to me.

"They still have souls?!" I hissed, grabbing her shoulders and forcing her to look at me. If she was making all of this up, I would kill her.

She laughed lightly, "Of course they still have souls. To be without, one would have to revert to an utterly animalistic state without any value or moral. Even demons have souls. Or so I'm told."

"D..Demons?" I faltered.

She chuckled. "I've never met one, but I don't doubt their existence. As you said, there is a lot of weird, unexplainable stuff out there."

"They have souls?" I parroted. I couldn't believe we were having this conversation. What normal seventeen year old girl walks around school on their first day spouting off nonsense about demons?

She nodded sagely. "Oh yes. Good and evil is all subjective, you know. They have morals and principles that they work to uphold. Just because they don't match the ideal of yours doesn't mean they're wrong."

I found myself gaping, just barely grasping how we'd come to this point in the conversation.

"Oh! This is me, gotta go," she turned toward the building of her next class, and I grabbed her arm.

"What does mine look like?" I murmured.

She smiled, "I was wondering if you were going to ask."

She took a step back from me, and that appraising gaze swept over me. When she spoke, her voice sounded distant, similar to when Alice explained her visions.

"At the core, you are good, pure. A white, almost silver glow. Intuitive, nurturing. A faint blue ring on the edge. Caring, loving. Your shield aura is very thin. You're very open with your soul. There's a dark blue there, fear of the future. It's mingling with a muddy brown. Insecurity. Your emotions…right now you're rather confused, but when we were in the cafeteria, you were shifting between a brilliant emerald and a forest green. Love and jealousy. They were heavily tinged with a clear, vibrant red, indicating passion."

She blinked, shaking herself.

Wow.

"That's…Weird." I declared.

She laughed, shrugging. "What can I say?"

"Do you want to hang out after school?" I found myself blurting. Not only did I need to find out just how much she knew about the Cullens, but I was wildly curious about what she'd seen in the others.

"Oh." She seemed surprised, both brows raising, before she nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that."

"Cool. Did you drive?"

She shook her head, making a face. "Bus."

"That's fine, I've got a car."

"Your place or mine?"

I grimaced, thinking of Emmett's inappropriate response to her proximity. "Better be yours."

She nodded, her expression thoughtful. Perhaps she was reliving the same memory.

"Alright. I'll meet up with you in the parking lot after school then."

She waved, turning toward her class.

Well, I could definitely see how this may be a potential threat. She already knew they weren't human! How long until she figured out what they were? Would we have to move? What would they do with her? They wouldn't harm her, would they? Not like anyone would believe her!

I rested my hand against my head, feeling the beginnings of a headache accompanying the whirlwind of my thoughts.

I just needed to talk to someone.

Edward was in my next class, but he'd probably just go right to Carlisle. Emmett was definitely out of the question. Rose didn't even know the girl. And Jasper seemed more curious than concerned.

Alice…Alice had visions about Lys, already knew a bit about her and would probably be the most level-headed, all things considered.

I sighed, hurrying to class, not enjoying the idea of walking in late.

Alice it was.

I shivered slightly, having that strange sense that someone was watching me. The hairs at the nape of my neck prickled, and though I told myself I was being silly, I couldn't help but glance over my shoulder.

A pair of angry gold eyes met mine.

Edward.

Shit…

I sighed in resignation.

Edward it was…

* * *

**A/N: Let me know what you think! :)**

**Also, if you're some kind of crazy aura expert, don't come after me about this chapter. I made most of it up, the only thing I looked up was aura colors. I mean, I figure I can do that, it's a vampire story. :)**

**I haven't taken Spanish in a long time, but a friend of mine promised me that what I wrote here was correct. *crosses fingers***


	15. Cherry Pie

**A/N: Whew, well I have a little bit to say here this time, actually.**

**I was pretty shocked by the mixed feelings on my OC. Please don't leave because of her appearance, and if you do, well, I'm sorry to see you go. Those of you that love her? Yay! Those of you that are indifferent? Well, I don't know if any of you folks even exist. I respect all of your opinions, even if I don't necessarily agree with them.**

**Let me say that she is _not_ a love interest for either Jasper or Edward. That much I can assure you. She's a much needed human touch in a world where Bella is surrounded by nothing but the supernatural. I know we're not overly eager to accept new characters in a world we've already come to recognize and love, but just give her a chance. After her initial debut in these past few chapters, she will become less of a focal point. **

**As always, thanks to all my lovely readers for the reviews on the previous chapter! Your encouragement is very gratifying!**

**Anywho, the following chapter is from Bella's PoV. Hope you enjoy it! Hit the button at the bottom to let me know! :)**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 12

Cherry Pie

"You weren't going to tell me?" Edward asked incredulously as his cool, strong hand wrapped around my upper arm, just above my elbow. The cold contrast of his skin against mine made me shiver lightly and goosebumps chased a tingling path down toward my hand.

"You were going to find out eventually, weren't you?" I asked, stumbling slightly as he began to pull me away from my seemingly unattainable destination of the math building. "Where are we going?"

"Why weren't you going to come to _me_ with this information?" He ignored my second question all together. I was only mildly surprised by the depth of his anger on this. It was Edward after all. If I so much as breathed without his prior knowledge and permission it was cause for an uproar.

I tugged lightly against his grasp, but he simply tightened his hold; far from the point of pain, but enough to let me know that I wasn't going to be free until he decided to make it so. I sighed, quickening my pace to match his long legged strides.

"Well, don't you think you occasionally have a tendency to overreact?" I hedged timidly, hoping to diffuse the potentially explosive suggestion by quickly adding, "Where _are_ we going?!"

It didn't work.

"_I have a tendency to overreact?"_ He looked at me as though I'd just asked for his blessing for Jasper and I to marry.

I stared knowingly right back. Could he possibly prove my point more?

He took a brief, steadying breath, and nodded. "Alright, I will admit to perhaps, on occasion, taking things rather… personally when they involve you."

I scoffed. "On occasion?"

"Bella..." he warned quietly.

Of course. Gloating by the winner of such battles was only acceptable if Edward himself was the victor. I rolled my eyes, following his quick steps hurriedly.

Wait…We were definitely not getting any closer to my original destination.

"Where are you taking me?"

"To the car. We need to talk."

I blinked. "What? No! Edward, I can't miss the first day of class! Math is definitely not my strong subject, and unlike you, I don't have eighty-something years of knowledge to tide me over. Hello, _human_, remember?!"

He cast a surreptitious glance around as my voice began to rise.

"Bella, please. Not information we need to be broadcasting."

I scowled, feeling my irritation with his condescending attitude growing by the second. "Let go of me!" I dug my feet into the damp ground and was shocked when he continued to pull me right along, fairly dragging me toward the parking lot. I pulled out the only weapon in my arsenal that seemed to work with any of them. "Edward, if you don't let me go right this instant I will tell Carlisle!"

He paused briefly. "You're going to _tell_ on me?"

I glared in the face of his amused skepticism. "Yes, I will. I'm sure Carlisle would like to know that you caused me to miss my _first _day of math due to some little temper tantrum."

His eyes narrowed, but my words had their desired effect, as his fingers faltered just slightly on my arm. I quickly jerked free. It was like pulling your arm out from between two gigantic boulders. I winced, the expression souring to a grimace at the realization that I would be wearing Edward's handprint as a bruise for the second time in so many weeks. For feeling bad about being a vampire, he sure used the supernatural power it entailed without conscience.

Knowing there was no way he was going to let me get to class short of my making a very embarrassing public scene, (despite my threat, I knew he'd be able to convince Carlisle that his actions were in the right, as they were undoubtedly done in an attempt to 'preserve my safety') I opted for what I saw as the only other out.

I turned swiftly and ran.

"Bella!" Edward exclaimed exasperatedly.

I'm willing to admit that this was not the brightest of plans ever conceived. Who attempts an escape knowing it's doomed to failure?

Graceful, agile vampire. Clumsy, bumbling human. You do the math.

Still, with Edward confined to human speed, and my feet apparently having a good day, I made it much farther than I'd anticipated.

As I passed the Lit building, the math classroom within my sights, I glanced over my shoulder briefly, gauging my success rate.

It was at about .0001%.

Edward was right on my heels, and I uttered a startled cry as he suddenly grabbed me around the waist and dragged me around the corner of the building, the damp shadows enclosing us. He pushed me against the siding, not roughly but certainly not gently. Acceding momentary defeat, I leaned against the faux wooden paneling, despite the cold wetness seeping into the back of my shirt, panting from my exertion. Several silent seconds passed in this manner. I closed my eyes, listening to the quiet whisper of trapped rain drops sliding down from the canopy of the trees, trickling into the foliage, and finally the earth.

"Do you really have no sense at all?" he suddenly, heatedly blurted.

My eyes snapped open and I fixed him with a frown.

"Excuse me?"

"Why do you do this to me?" he demanded, pacing a small trail back and forth in front of me.

"What, Edward? What am I doing to you?"

"Put yourself in unnecessarily dangerous situations?" His tone suggested it was nothing short of exceedingly obvious.

I arched a brow. "You mean like the one I'm in right now?"

He appeared confused. "What? No, I mean…"

I interrupted him. "No? It's not dangerous to be in a secluded area with an agitated vampire?"

He scowled. "You're safe with me."

I scoffed. Whether or not that statement was true remained to be seen. Hadn't he always proclaimed that no harm would come to me when in his care? Hadn't he been the one to nearly claim my life just couple of wee…

Edward began to talk right over non-verbal line of questioning.

"Listen to me Bella. You are not to go with this girl after school, do you understand me?"

He turned swiftly, trapping me against the building with a hand on either side of my head. I was briefly reminded of Emmett's intimidation tactics from earlier, and of Edward's response to them. And like a brittle twig, I snapped.

I couldn't recall having raised my voice to Edward. Ever. Not as a child, not through my awkward adolescence, not even when I'd hit puberty and his protective nature had crossed the border into overbearing. Ostentatious displays of anger were definitely not encouraged when the majority of your family had the ability to destroy most natural and artificial substances with the flick of a wrist.

Seventeen years of voluntary oppression was probably the cause for the sudden, unbridled rage that surged through me. My cheeks tingled warmly, indicating a brilliant flush and my hands clenched into tight fists at my sides, my nails biting into my palms.

I took a sudden step into his personal space, shoving at this chest. He must not have been expecting it, because he actually took a slight step back in response.

"No, _Edward_, you listen to _me_ for a change! You are not my parent; last I checked you weren't even my legal guardian. You have absolutely no say over what I can and cannot do. I should be able to eat junk at school without suffering the evil eye. And I should be able to make friends without you inspecting their family tree going back fifteen generations! You want me to live a _normal, human life_, so let me live it! If you'd like to bring this up with Carlisle and Esme, you feel free, but until they expressly forbid me from hanging out with a _normal, human girl_, you can just take all your patronizing bullshit and shove it."

He looked absolutely appalled. I allowed myself a brief moment of reveling in that expression before retreating back into the refuge of my anger.

When he spoke his voice was a mere murmur, though it held a definite note of strain, as though his self-control was hanging by a very tenuous thread. "Bella, you have to know, everything I do, it's all with your best interest in heart."

I laughed skeptically, a hollow burst of sound. I thought my eyebrows might disappear right into my hairline for as wide as my eyes became. "Are you kidding me?! Edward all of your actions are all about _you_. I hate to be the one to break this to you, but someone really needs to grow a..." I paused for just a second here. The phrase "a pair" was on the tip of my tongue, an expression I'd picked up shortly after entering junior high, but heaven forbid I give poor Edward's still heart such a jolt by besmirching my chaste and innocent avatar in his mind. "...a spine and inform you of how ridiculous your self-righteous crap is. My best interests are only important when they just happen to coincide with yours, and we both know it. You want to guard and take care of me when it's convenient for _you_."

"Bella," he whispered, sounding pained.

"Shut up, Edward. You can't even refute the validity of everything I'm saying, can you?!" I took another step forward. "Where were your good intentions when you tried to turn Emmett on me? Where the hell were they when you knowingly hurt me? And please inform me of what little holiday they were on when you were merrily pondering tearing my _throat out!"_

He was staring at me as though he'd never seen me before, and my anger fizzled slightly beneath the onslaught of his horrified gaze.

"Bella," he murmured brokenly, "you have to know...that...wasn't...that wasn't me."

And just like that he set me off again.

"Who was it?!" I snapped. "Were you possessed?"

"Yes! Yes, that's exactly what it's like Isabella! I can't even begin to describe the intensity of the need. All sane, rational thoughts leave you and it's like something else entirely has taken control."

I rolled my eyes. "Yet you're so quick to tell me, Edward, that that's _exactly_ what you are. It's _all_ you are! It's what Emmett and Alice are! What Esme is! Monsters! You don't treat it like something uncontrollable, Edward!"

He clutched at his head, as though he could feel pain, and a tingle of remorse made itself known, somewhere in my stomach.

"Of course it's not all that I am!" he spat. "But I know that it's in here!" He rested his hand against his chest, where I knew his heart lay still and dormant. "What kind of..._person_ walks around knowing that he could unleash something wholly evil upon humanity at any moment?!"

"You're being ridiculous," I exclaimed archly. "We are all capable of terrible things, Edward. Humans have done things that make me feel sick to even ponder. It's a matter of self-control. Of morals and principles. Do you allow that darker side to take control..."

He lunged at me so quickly that I almost didn't have time to be afraid.

Almost.

My minimal self-preservation flickered to life as he crowded me back against the classroom, a low, feral snarl echoing from the depths of his throat. "This cannot be controlled!"

"Of course it can. You wouldn't be able to live amongst humans if that were even remotely true."

He laughed coldly. "You can't possibly understand."

"Yes, because I'm the sweet, innocent human, right? I couldn't possibly begin to comprehend urges and instincts, demanding to be acted on, that are completely out of character for me." My mind swam briefly with hazy recollections. Edward's cool hands. Jasper's lips. Warm flesh.

"Bella, enough," he commanded sharply.

"Or what, Edward?"

He was silent and I felt an unfamiliar smirk tugging at the edges of my lips.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Look, I'm practically an adult, and your tenuous-self control aside, I don't need you watching my every move. I'm going with Lysandra this afternoon, and you can't stop me. You can just run along home and brood about the tragedy of your very existen..."

The callous words were lost in the cool depths of his mouth as his lips suddenly came crashing down upon mine. The cold iron bands of his arms closed around my waist, dragging me away from the wet siding, crushing me to the length of his body. Every soft plane molded intimately to hard musculature.

By the time my addled brain had scrambled into the action, demanding that I push him away, my traitorous body had converted the excess of my potent rage into demanding need.

My arms twined around his neck, fingers raking through the damp silk of his hair. He purred his approval, a low rumbling sound that echoed hollowly in his chest, sending small shivers of pleasure coursing through me.

Weeks of pent up frustration. Teenage hormones. Edward's ridiculous beauty.

Blame it on what you will. I was later inclined to believe it an incendiary combination of the three as I found myself pressing closer, answering the demands of his lips as well as making my own.

One of his hands slid up my spine, before tangling in my hair. He wound the strands around his fist, pulling my head lightly this way and that. I followed his lead without question, caught up in the maelstrom of consuming lust.

More. I made the silent demand without realizing I'd done so, and I felt the building against my back once again. One of his strong hands slid around to my hip, gripping it possessively for a moment, before sliding up. He lingered at the hem of my shirt, on that tiny bit of skin exposed there, and my back arched gently, urging him onward. He shuddered, and I felt his cool touch slide over the warm expanse of my stomach. He spread his hand out, his palm resting just below my belly button, and I marveled at how large he was. The tips of his fingers just missed the undersides of my breasts.

The thought was lost as he slanted his lips firmly over mine, demanding absolute incoherence.

His hand began to creep upward, and it didn't occur to me to stop him. Right now, in this moment, this is exactly what I wanted. The fact that my brain was short circuiting didn't matter in the slightest.

The backs of his knuckles just barely grazed the rounded edge of my breast, a mere whisper of a touch through the plain cotton of my bra, and I uttered a quiet, breathy sound.

The noise was loud in a silence previously inhabited only by my increasingly labored breathing.

It was also just enough to snap Edward out of the trance that seemed to have settled over both of us.

He stiffened suddenly, and I blinked as his eyes snapped open. Slowly, very slowly, he pulled back. He peered at me; his gaze a deep bronze, heavy lidded with what I could only assume was his own arousal.

"Bella," he whispered, his hand freeing itself from the confines of my lacy shirt to stroke my flushed face lightly. The touch felt wonderful against my heated skin and I leaned into his hand, instinctively reaching for him once more.

He held me gently away.

Why? Why was he pushing me away? He should just kiss me some more.

"No, Bella, not like this," he murmured.

The sound of his rejection, quiet and resolute, penetrated the hazy fog that had seemed quite content to keep my brain completely incapacitated.

Oh my God.

Edward.

I had just had my first kiss (and then some!)...with Edward.

My trembling fingers rose to my swollen lips, touching them lightly, as though they were some alien appendage, recently attached to my face. They certainly didn't feel like my lips. A brilliant blush made its way into my cheeks, undoubtedly turning them an attractive shade of crimson.

"Oh my God...what...what did we just do?" I murmured in shock.

He was standing very close still, his hands having reclaimed their positions on either side of me, caging me against the building. His eyes were closed and a small muscle in his jaw was ticking convulsively. Several uncomfortable seconds passed in silence, the entire time my mind a whirlwind of half-coherent thoughts.

Finally he looked at me, murmuring, "I'm sorry."

I frowned. He may have initiated the act, but I certainly hadn't said no, had I?

"Are you? Why?" I asked curiously, horrified to find my voice still breathless.

He looked at me intensely, his eyes lingering briefly on my lips. I nervously darted the tip of my tongue out to moisten them, and Edward's low groan bathed the warmth of my face in his cool, sweet smelling breath.

Despite the turmoil in my mind, I found myself wanting to get closer to him.

He pulled back, perhaps at my thoughts, and crossed his arms defensively over his chest.

"I shouldn't have done that." The words fairly dripped with self-loathing and I felt a swell of irritation building once more.

"I should've said no," I countered.

"Don't. This was my fault," he sighed, glancing away.

And here we go. Resurrection of the drama queen. Why did he always revert to this? Couldn't he just be honest with himself for once? It was okay that he liked that. Hell, I had. But no, he had to go on his fallen angel rant.

He glared at me as he followed the train of thought through my head.

"Maybe, just maybe, not everything you do is something that requires the delegation of blame, Edward. Maybe that was just two people kissing, because they both wanted to. Why are you such a martyr?"

"You wanted to?" he asked, his mood switching so quickly that I felt the beginnings of mental whiplash.

"I...I think so?" I tentatively agreed. I was certainly no expert in the art of intimacy, but the low almost electrical current that had singed through my veins when we'd kissed had seemed to indicate that I liked it, and perhaps wanted more. Of course, my brain had had very little to do with the decision making at that point.

Apparently my answer was less than satisfactory, because Edward waded right back into his shallow pool of self-hatred. "Ugh. You see? I'm just...there's something wrong with me."

I sighed heavily, tipping my head back onto the wet wall. Alice was going to have a fit when she saw what I'd done to my first day appearance. Closing my eyes, I tried to get my racing mind to focus on the issue at hand.

"Do you think you could save the self-flagellation for another time? I'm already really late for class."

"Bella, why aren't you more concerned about this...this incident?"

I laughed, ducking out from under his arm. He didn't stop me.

"You think I'm not concerned Edward?" I turned on my heel, unwisely walking backward as I faced him to continue speaking. Thankfully, my feet refrained from marring my exit. "Of course I'm worried. What's this going to do to our relationship? Is everyone else going to find out? What will people think? What are your feelings toward me?" He made to interrupt here, but I held up my hand. "And more importantly, what are my feelings toward you?" I shook my head. He watched my gradual retreat silently. "The world isn't going to stop turning because we kissed, Edward. And I can't stop living and go brood in my bedroom for a few years. I'm mortal. Time isn't a luxury, it's an enemy."

Again he looked as though he was going to speak, and I quickly turned and sprinted to class.

The seat beside me remained conspicuously empty for the remainder of the period.

* * *

I was less than anxious to get to Home Ec.

Probably not for the same reasons that any number of other students might be worried. I didn't think I'd start the building on fire, or scorch a pumpkin pie into an inedible lump of coal. In fact, the potential for cooking disaster was barely a blip on the radar. As long as my feet behaved, I actually wasn't half bad in the kitchen.

I did briefly envision myself tripping into an open oven, while Alice and Emmett, dressed as Hansel and Gretel, cheered and clapped, slamming the door shut with glee. I couldn't help but grin. Just a little.

No. It definitely wasn't an end to rival that of a wicked with that had me worried.

It was Alice.

Not because I thought she might've seen. Nosy little thing that she was, that wasn't even a question. She'd seen. It was more a matter of how long she'd known. Had she just caught a glimpse of it as Edward's self-loathing and my sudden fury ignited into something far greater than either of us was prepared to deal with? Or had she known for some time?

And was it wrong of me to think that, had she known, she should've given me some kind of advance warning?

I dawdled outside the math building, not at all my usual style, casting covert glances over the groups of students walking past. Though I tried to fool myself, I was definitely looking for Edward. I had a sneaking suspicion that he was already at home brooding. Perhaps he'd even called Carlisle and poured his cold, still heart out. I blanched at the idea of Carlisle, _my DAD_, being privy to such intimate details of my life.

I waged a swift inner battle as to whether or not I should change my after school plans. Was this big enough to warrant cancelling the first real chance I'd had to hang out with someone other than one of my family members in something like, five years? Should I go home and work things out with Edward? Head potential disaster off at the proverbial pass? The last thing I wanted was for this to get out before I'd had a chance to really get a grasp on what had happened and what exactly it meant.

I faltered, my resolve wavering, weakening for just a moment.

Thankfully, the voice of reason did not remain silent for long.

Wouldn't Edward just love _that_? Cancellation of the very plans that had caused this whole mess to begin with. Ugh. He'd be getting exactly what he wanted.

And when it came right down to it, I was sick of always bending to Edward's unyielding demands simply to avoid confrontation. I may be the inherently weaker party in our relationship, but that did not give him the right to eliminate my free will. I was mortal, fragile in comparison to my family, certainly, but humans were a lot stronger than he was willing to give us credit for.

My spine straightening, I practically marched to the building that housed my next class. It was a shiny, updated structure, prominent against the washed out backdrop of dark, damp greenery and outdated edifices. My newfound confidence, fickle by nature, quavered slightly as I threw the door open, only to find Alice and Emmett, both looking incredibly bored, already seated at a table together. It was unusual for them to be so early. I had a feeling I knew why that might be.

When Alice glanced up at me knowingly, her gaze sparkling with something akin to mischievous amusement, my hypothesis was proven correct.

Just what was she going to say to me?

Only one way to find out.

I trudged over to the table, tossing my bag on the floor by the chair I slid into. Emmett looked at me with an eager grin. He gestured between the two of us, wagging his finger as he mouthed, 'you and me: partners'. I laughed quietly beneath my breath. Why was he bothering with silence when we had a good three minutes before class started? He cast a surreptitious glance toward Alice, as though reading my mind, and I bit back the sudden laughter that bubbled up, threatening to burst free.

Alice was an absolutely terrible cook.

Not that she'd made many attempts, mind you. The first two or three had been enough to completely turn her off to the entire experience.

At least Jasper _tried_.

Her brow rose archly as she glanced between the two of us; no doubt she'd discerned the content of our silent conversation. I smiled apologetically, while Emmett just shrugged.

"Sorry, Ali, you suck."

She uttered a tiny, lady-like humph, and turned her chair toward me.

Uh-oh.

We stared at each other intently for a moment, the silence between us thickening with the conversation neither of us was willing to begin.

Perhaps a minute had passed before I took the plunge, clearing my throat and hesitantly declaring, "So..."

"It happened?" she murmured quickly, quietly. I didn't need clarification on what 'it' was.

A small frown tugged at the corners of my lips. Why was she asking? She'd seen it hadn't she? Perhaps it was so unbelievable that she found herself questioning her ability. I sighed lightly, before nodding. Heat flooded my cheeks as the response provoked an unbidden surge of memory.

"Wow," she breathed, glancing at her hands. "I never thought he'd actually do it. I mean, he's wanted to for months now, planned to approach you numerous times, but you know how he is, he's never..." The words, what seemed to be a verbatim translation of Alice's current thoughts, trailed off and her eyes widened to the size of saucers as her gaze strayed swiftly back to my face.

I felt as though my heart had just stopped, dropped like a stone into my stomach, and promptly began to beat again. I gasped for air, though there was a ready supply, and the world I thought I'd known shifted precariously on its axis, everything changing in a single, discomfiting instant.

"Bella?" Alice asked in the most timid voice I'd ever heard her assume.

I stared at her blankly for a moment, suddenly finding my voice enough to hiss, "_Months?!_"

"Bella!" A familiar voice broke through the strained silence of our sudden staring contest and my head shifted toward the sound.

Lysandra stood in the doorway, all smiles. I felt a flash of relief as the singular source of relative normality in my life appeared like some sort of guardian angel. I heralded her over with a wave.

I turned to Alice, who actually shifted away with a frown beneath my narrowed gaze, "This conversation is far from over." What had she known that she'd been hiding from me?! Didn't I have a right to know when someone I _lived with_ was harboring feelings for me?!

A tiny voice, the devil's advocate, laughed at what it seemed to think was unjustified anger. _Would you like for Alice to tell Jasper how you feel about him? Or perhaps nothing should be sacred and she should reveal all future events, important or not, just so you can be prepared for them when they involve you? Other humans don't get that benefit, you know. Perhaps you're just being a little selfish..._

I promptly squashed that train of thought, stopping it dead in its tracks. This was different. This was important.

I glanced up from the table, shaking my head faintly to clear it. Lys had stopped several feet away from the table, a small frown creasing her brow.

My stare was questioning as it met hers. She nodded her head slightly, brows rising, as though to indicate that I should look at something behind me.

I glanced over my shoulder. Alice was looking morose, doodling on a piece of paper. Emmett sat like a stone statue beside her.

Emmett...

Of course, how thoughtless of me. I was just about to get up and suggest she join me at another table when she squared her shoulders, marching over with a look of determination. I hid a smile behind my hand.

She slipped into the chair next to mine, completing our circus sideshow of a table.

"Hey," she said, only a little lamely.

Alice gave her a cheerful wave, belied by the intensity of her stare, while Emmett simply shifted uncomfortably. Served him right, I figured, losing control the way he had.

Thankfully, we were saved from further awkward interaction as a portly, older man entered, cheerfully welcoming us to junior level home economics! His small, square glasses glinted in the fluorescent light from above; combined with his white, grizzly beard, and glittering blue eyes, he reminded me of an old nineteen fifties Santa Claus.

He droned on for perhaps fifteen minutes, going over the syllabus and exclaiming about how exciting the wonderful world of domestic arts could be. I was horrified to discover that along with cooking, we'd be learning how to sew. Alice seemed particularly intrigued by this prospect. She turned toward me suddenly, her expression animated, looking for all the world as though she were about to say something. She paused, frowning, before her lips snapped shut, and she turned away with a sigh.

I felt a tug within the vicinity of my heart, and nudged her lightly, a questioning look upon my face.

She grinned giddily. "Sewing! This whole cooking fiasco might almost be worth it if I could design some of our own fashions!

I was briefly reminded of an episode of the Cosby Show, where one of the eldest siblings had assured her younger brother that she could sew a shirt just as good as the designers made. In typical sitcom predictability, it had not ended well. A wry smile tugged at my lips. Alice would probably be able to actually pull it off.

"Alice and Isabella Cullen."

I glanced up, flushing guiltily.

"Station seven."

I blinked. Station...seven?

"We're partnered!" Alice exclaimed happily, shooting Emmett a victorious grin.

He scowled darkly; no doubt imagining himself paired with some random human.

But fate just wasn't that kind.

"Emmett Cullen and Lysandra Jenkins, station eight."

I grimaced, shooting her a glance.

She looked positively panicked. I laid a hand lightly on her shoulder. "You'll be fine," I assured her.

Her face was ashen as she looked at me wide-eyed, nodding. "Yes, of course." Not like she had much of a choice. What was she going to do, tell our teacher that Emmett had almost attacked her and she just wasn't comfortable partnered with him? Alice watched her curiously for a moment, her lips pursed in a small moue.

The rest of the class was paired off and we headed to our cooking stations, each complete with their own sink and dishwasher, oven and counter space. A small, laminated cherry pie recipe was sitting on a tiny decorative easel on the counter.

I began to gather the necessary ingredients, while Alice hung back, looking equal parts annoyed and anxious.

"What do I do?" she suddenly demanded.

"Why don't you..." I shifted my weight from one foot to the other, pondering. Selfishly give her something easy or try and help her actually learn and tempt the possibility of a less than passing grade?

I handed her the sauce pan. I didn't know when this knowledge would ever come in handy for her, but if she wanted to learn, I wasn't about to deny her.

"Okay. Let's get you started on the filling while I do the dough." A compromise; everyone knows that a crust can make or break a pie, or so the lively chefs on the Food Network proclaimed. I'd always used the pre-made stuff, myself.

"Take that bag of frozen cherries." She scanned the countertop, anxiously eying the butter and flour, before her eyes landed upon the brightly colored bag. She held it up triumphantly.

I quickly set her to simmering the cherries and sugar in the saucepan, and once I'd explained to her that cooking was quite similar to following a formula, say for creating a perfume, she seemed to relax slightly. I refrained from mentioning the important roles that the senses of taste and smell played, considering hers were quite a bit different than those of your average human.

We cooked in companionable silence, until she suddenly glanced at me with a smile.

"So, how was it?"

It took me a moment, as I looked up from kneading the dough, to understand just what she was referring to. When I did, my jaw dropped and my face flushed crimson.

"Alice!" I exclaimed, my self-righteous outrage marred slightly by the tiny grin I couldn't conceal.

She shrugged, looking as innocent as Alice could. "What? Can't blame a girl for trying."

I chuckled, finally relenting with a hurried, whispered, "It was good."

Alice's tinkling, melodic laughter had many heads turning our way. Her eyes sharpened slightly as she glanced at the companion station next to ours, fixing on Emmett.

"Emmett wants to know what we're talking about," she declared haughtily.

I murmured quietly, knowing he could hear me, "None of your business, Emmett."

I glanced at Alice, who was laughing quietly. "He says it most certainly is his business, considering it sounds like we're talking about _boys_."

"Trust me, Em, you really don't want to know."

"He's fervently exclaiming that he does."

I glanced at him, meeting his gaze, the corners of my lips twitching. Lysandra was standing awkwardly next to him, as far away as the small space and his rather large frame allowed.

"Okay then," I said with a Cheshire smile. "We were just talking about my first kiss. Which I had. Today." I wisely left out the part about who the other participant was.

A strand of silence, fraught with tension, unraveled in the space between us, and quite suddenly, the small package of flour in his hands exploded, showering both he and Lys in a cloud of white dust.

I pressed my lips together, wanting desperately to laugh at Emmett's predicament, but not wanting to draw attention to the girl who I was attempting to befriend. It was far too late for that. As the flour settled around them, heaped into small piles, reminiscent of snow drifts, the class began to laugh uproariously. I allowed myself a tiny giggle.

Emmett was stoically silent from then on; at least when it came to speaking with me. As Alice and I placed our prepared pie in the oven, sitting on the counter and talking about fashion (Alice was talking, I was observing the rest of the class' participants), I noticed that the conversation between he and Lys actually seemed to be flowing quite nicely.

I arched a brow in surprise as their quiet laughter floated over to us on the pie-scented air. She was certainly more quick to forgive then I think I could've been. Or had been, for that matter.

My gaze was critical as Emmett suddenly reached in, his big hand looking even more enormous when compared to the tiny girl beside him, and he brushed a small piece of cherry off of Lys' cheek. She shifted, an unusual expression crossing her face, as though she were about to turn and run, before she submitted to Emmett's boyish charm, tipping her face toward him.

I hurriedly nudged Alice. She glanced up from the magazine she was flipping through.

"What the hell is that?" I demanded, my voice quiet, my tone anything but.

She frowned thoughtfully, watching the two of them, before her gaze shifted to the ceiling and she sighed.

"I'm not sure," she whispered.

I had a feeling that she wasn't being completely honest with me.

"They're not going to like...I mean...that's not... that's just friendly, right?"

Her eyes met mine. She said nothing.

I frowned, looking back at them. Lys was singing something into her spatula. Emmett was leaning against the counter, watching her with an expression I was not eager to decipher.

Alice hopped down as our timer dinged. "It's not my place to divulge that information, Bella. I'm sorry." She sounded pained, as though she thought I might hold it against her. I could admit that the fear wasn't entirely unfounded.

She was right. My earlier anger had been completely out of line. Alice had the ability to warn us when great danger approached, kept us safe in a way that no other family could claim. How she dealt with the burden of all else she saw, the secrets she must keep, was up to her. I couldn't expect her to tell me everything just because we were sisters. It was unrealistic and unfair.

I lightly laid a hand on her shoulder, smiling gently.

"I know."

Her smile was relieved and she set the pie on top of the oven with her usual enthusiasm.

"So, how'd we do?!" she asked energetically.

I glanced over my shoulder in time to see Lys and Em pull their pie out of the oven, laughing. I could see, even from this distance that it was a hideous wreck. Lysandra giggled as she poked at a lumpy, burnt edge.

I looked back at the picture perfect creation that Alice and I had made.

I forced a smile. "It looks really good."

* * *

***ducks* Please don't kill me for giving Edward the first kiss. I assure you that when Jasper gets his, it will be a thousand times hotter! *pleading smile***

**So there you have Chapter 12! Let me know what you thought! :)**


	16. Interlude : The Lion and The Mouse

**A/N: So...I got some awesome response for my last chapter, and I just wanted to say thank you so much! I desperately tried to answer everyone's reviews, but I just didn't have the time. :( I'm so sorry about that, but please know that I appreciate all of them so much and they provide me with a lot of inspiration!**

**I'm also relieved to hear that you guys trust I won't mess this up too much. :P**

**This is a brief interlude chapter with some brotherly interaction. (Not _that_ kind of interaction. :P)**

**Interlude 4 is from Jasper's PoV**

* * *

Calefaction

Interlude 4

The Lion and The Mouse

"Jasper!"

I glanced up from my inspection of the damp concrete at the sound of my name being called. Though I immediately recognized the voice, the visual confirmation caused a single brow to climb.

Edward.

I watched him coolly as he jogged across the grounds, curious as to why he wasn't in class. While our absence from school certainly wasn't unusual, we generally waited a couple of weeks to become scarce. Of course, I wasn't exactly a shining paragon of such things, skipping out on my last period study hall. I stared at him impassively as he approached.

He matched my stride as I continued to walk. For reasons I couldn't begin to fathom I briefly expected him to be panting, perhaps even flushed from his minor exertion. Of course, he looked as calm and collected as ever.

His emotions, however, belied his expression. Anxious nerves and an almost violent sense of concern assaulted me as he drew up. Instinctively I sent out a calming wave of tranquility.

He stared straight ahead, silent for the moment, and I didn't push him. It couldn't be too important, or he'd have said something straight off. I peered at the shoe laces in my boots, smirking slightly as I realized that they exactly matched the color of my pants. Oh Alice...

"I need your help," Edward suddenly declared, taking a deep breath and deigning to face me.

I glanced up, blinking slowly, waiting for an elaboration. He had to know that I wasn't foolish enough to agree to this favor without further information.

"It's about Bella."

A lazy smile tugged at my lips and I looked away.

_Isn't it always?_

He offered no outward response, but I could all but feel his hackles rise. He refrained from responding to my thoughts, plowing right ahead with his request.

"It's this girl. Bella's new friend?"

I glanced at him from the corner of my eye. His concern was rising exponentially with every word spoken. Regardless of my nonchalance regarding what I figured was an imagined issue, he was absolutely serious about this.

"What about her?" I finally asked.

"I think it unwise for Bella to spend time in her company."

This news came as less than a surprise. If Edward had come to me with any problem outside the realm of Bella, I'd have thought something wrong with him.

"Mmm?" is all that I responded with.

He nodded, obviously reading the indifference of my thoughts. He was over-reacting, of course. Again.

"Jasper, just listen to me. The girl is...different!"

I scoffed. "And we're excellent judges of the abnormal, aren't we?"

"She's a hazard! She knows about us. I don't know how, but she knows."

I couldn't remain entirely blasé on this note. I didn't believe that she knew _everything_ regarding the Cullens, but I was positive that she was suspicious at least. Not knowing the little mortal from Eve, we had absolutely no guarantee that she could be trusted with what information she did have. Certainly Alice would see if she became a threat… I frowned. Perhaps we should have let Emmett take care of the potential risk after all.

Escaping the contrivances my mind hastened to create should things go awry I found Edward staring at me, perhaps expecting an answer. I offered what I knew.

"She can read auras."

He was apparently stunned into silence for a moment. "W...What?"

"Auras, if you believe in such concepts, and I think that we probably should, all things considered; she can see them, and it seems understands them."

"How do you-?"

"I overheard her explaining to Bella."

He seemed to ponder this. "Do you believe it?"

I shrugged. "Of all people, I, the walking corpse, probably don't have the right to question it."

He sighed, nodding. "What do you think of her?"

"I don't," I answered honestly, glancing at him. "She holds no interest for me, aside from the obvious." He didn't need clarification that I meant the presence of the steady crimson and cerulean streams just beneath the surface of her fragile skin. "I'm glad that Bella's found a human friend, but I don't plan to involve myself unless Alice advises it necessary."

He growled in frustration. "How can you always be so calm?!"

"Why do you feel the constant need to work yourself up?" I countered mildly.

"Will you help me or not?" he demanded.

"Probably not, but why don't you ask me anyway?"

His hands clenched into tight knuckled fists"Bella is going to the girl's house this afternoon. She and I aren't exactly on the best of terms at the moment-"

"I can't imagine why," I interrupted.

He shot me a glare. "...-So I need you to figure out a way to accompany her."

"No." The single word of denial was out before I'd even realized I intended to speak.

"Jasper, please."

I shook my head. "Nope."

"_Why?!_"

"Why? Perhaps you should explain to me _why_ I should risk Bella's wrath over your ridiculous insecurities. Why you feel the constant need to interfere with her life when it's obviously unnecessary. If anything should happen, Alice will see-…"

"Minds change constantly, Jasper, Alice may not see it in time."

His incessant nagging was grating on my nerves. Frankly, I didn't know how Bella could stand to spend so much time with him. If he read my irritation he opted to ignore it.

"Please! I'd do it myself, but she's already furious with me." His emotions shifted slightly, and a sliver of shame prodded me painfully. I mentally swatted it away for the pest that it was.

"Why don't you ask Emmett, I'm sure he'd be more than happy to assist with this ridiculous little mission?"

Edward shifted uncomfortably and his self-loathing increased to a degree that had me peering at him curiously. He usually hated himself for some frivolous reason or another, but to have it so prominent; he must have done something that he deemed terrible.

"I...think I'd rather like to avoid Emmett for a while."

Hmmm...This could prove to be rather interesting.

"And why's that?"

"I'd rather not disc-..."

"Edward, you're asking for my aid, and things really aren't looking as though they're going to end in your favor. Perhaps you can dispense with the misplaced modesty and just tell me what's on your mind?"

He scowled darkly, answering me evasively when finally he spoke. "I have a feeling he's going to come into some information that will be cause for some tension between us, if he hasn't already."

I arched a brow as he didn't offer anything more.

_And that information would be...?_

Silence greeted my thought, and for a second I believed he'd given up. Finally, he sighed. "I was arguing this afternoon with Bella, about the girl? Things were rather heated, and she made some unusually cruel remarks. I wasn't thinking...It was like all of the emotions I'd held at bay for the past several months finally burst forth..."

_Get on with it already,_ a voice in my mind interrupted dryly.

"I...I kissed her."

_Kissed her...Kissed her...Kissed..._

The word played over and over in my mind, like a skipping record. I stopped dead in my tracks, turning very slowly to face him. My voice was far more ominous than I'd intended when I spoke, something I attributed to the fact that I suddenly wanted nothing more than to cause him bodily harm. "You did..._what_?"

He was watching me strangely, his eyes narrowed slightly, and I knew he was rifling through my mind. Unfortunately, Bella was taking up a rather large portion of that immediate space. Her dark eyes, her soft lips, the exquisite sweep of her emotions stirring my nerves...I scrubbed it all away and began silently singing the state song of Texas.

"I kissed her," he proclaimed, almost defiantly.

"Emmett's going to kill you," _if I don't do it first._ The unspoken ending intruded, unbidden, and he took a defensive step away from me. I watched him coldly.

"What does it matter to you?"

It was a good question, and one I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to examine, let alone answer. Why _did_ I care? A number of flimsy excuses were readily available. Because I didn't want her to end up with someone as controlling as Edward. Because she'd never had a relationship with another human. Because she was far too good for him. While they all held a note of truth, only one answer truly mattered; the one that had burrowed in the back of my mind, and consistently popped up at the most inopportune times. Because I wanted her myself. I blanched at the idea of sharing that information with Edward, instead blurting the first excuse that came to mind. "She's our _sister_!"

He rolled his eyes, laughing mirthlessly. "And the thought of her hands all over you is a very brotherly one."

I'd have blushed if I could. Instead, I simply glared, unable to defend myself against an accusation that we both knew was true. As we squared off, both glaring, his anger melted into a steady stream of distress.

"You said there was nothing between the two of you," he murmured, the words an entreaty.

I shook my head. "There wasn't...isn't. She just..." I didn't want to place the blame on Bella, as though she were somehow directly responsible for my emotions, but she certainly hadn't been helping in my quest to build the platonic walls back up. I shrugged, "Of any of us, you know what she's been thinking lately. It's getting to me. I..I'm..." I faltered, holding my hands up helplessly. "I'm attracted to her."

Edward looked as though I'd punched him repeatedly, a terrible expression of pain and betrayal. His emotions crashed down on me in a single great wave, and I carefully erected what shields I could to defend myself.

"I...I _love_ her!" he exclaimed, shaking his head, as though he couldn't begin to fathom how I could do such a thing to him.

I spoke without thinking. "No, you don't."

He froze, drawing back. His gaze was sharp as it landed on my face. Dangerous. "What did you say?"

Unfortunately for him, those intimidation tactics were less than effective on me. "You don't love her, Edward. Perhaps you forget, but I can feel your emotions. You're infatuated with her, perhaps in love with the idea of being in love with her, but you're not in love with her. You'd never have done what you had if you loved her." It was a low blow, but it needed to be said.

He looked as though he wanted to kill me on the spot. I only hoped that my answering gaze replied with the single thought in my head. _Dare you to try._

"I. Love. Her." He said tightly.

I shrugged. "You probably think you do."

He was on me in a moment, my shirt fisted tightly in his hand, my back meeting a tree trunk with a resounding crash. Our furious gazes met, clashed violently.

"_I love her_," he snarled, his face close to mine.

"Do you?" I asked quietly, and felt a millisecond of doubt from him. I smirked slightly. More than enough to prove my point.

He read the caustic thought and slammed me hard against the tree, snarling quietly.

I silently reminded myself that it would be entirely inappropriate for me to tear his arms off and beat the shit out of him with them.

"Edward, it's not the time or place for this," I cautioned, silently scanning our surroundings for mortals.

He ignored my words, a low snarl tearing from his throat. It took everything in me to restrain the beast, rattling at the bars of its cage within me as it demanded that I allow it to meet Edward's. I knew that if I didn't stop this now our cover was going to be completely blown.

Taking a slow, steadying breath, I smirked, "You're not going to try and kiss me, are you?"

He stared at me as though I'd lost my mind, before the corners of his lips reluctantly twitched. He uttered a quiet laugh and stepped back, releasing his grasp on my shirt. I dusted myself off, straightening my clothing.

He looked only mildly contrite as he muttered, "Sorry about that."

I nodded, lying through my teeth as I replied, "It's okay."

We both shifted uneasily as the tension broke.

Despite my feelings toward his predictable behavior, I did feel mildly ashamed of myself for my thoughts on Bella considering what he'd told me. "I didn't mean for it to happen," I said lamely, rubbing the back of my neck.

"I know," he answered, glancing skyward. Fat drops of cool rain slowly plummeted to the Earth, as if prompted by his gaze.

"What are we going to do?"

He shrugged helplessly and remained silent. I brushed my dampening hair out of my eyes as the rain began to fall in earnest.

His emotions were a constantly shifting, almost living entity. Happiness, anger, bitterness, sadness...I was barely able to grasp one before it morphed into another.

He sighed quietly, "I worry about her."

"We all do."

"Not as I."

"Emmett?"

He shook his head. "He puts her in danger as often as he protects her from it, doesn't he? Please, Jasper, please do this for me?"

_I thought you didn't beg?_

He laughed, "For Bella's sake, there isn't much I wouldn't do."

He meant it. If the ringing clarity of his voice wasn't enough, his emotion was absolutely resolute. He honestly believed there was nothing he wouldn't do for her. I couldn't help but mentally scoff and refute, _except for living her life..._He sighed, a pained expression crossing his face. Had I underestimated his emotion for her?

Dammit. Who could you count on , if not family?

"If I do this..." I began, and he turned toward me eagerly. "You are going to owe me like you've never owed anyone in your entire eighty years." I could already imagine the quiet fury in Bella's gaze as I carved a place for myself in a part of her life I hadn't been invited into.

He was already nodding. "Anything. Please."

I sighed heavily.

"Alright, I'll watch over her this afternoon, but if I find nothing unusual about this girl, you have to promise that you'll back off. Bella's human, not made of glass."

I doubted he heard a word I'd said, considering the dizzying relief coursing through him, but he nodded vigorously.

I turned away, trying to force my thoughts away from the realization that Bella had had her first kiss with Edward. It bothered me more than I was willing to admit. It wasn't that I necessarily wanted it to be with me, I lied to myself, just the fact that it'd been with Edward… Had she enjoyed it? Was she going to allow him further advances? Did she want to be with him?

"Jasper?"

I glanced over my shoulder. He was grinning his appreciation, and I couldn't help but smile faintly in return.

"You cannot implicate me in any way. She'll kill me."

I rolled my eyes, resisting the impulse to advise him that if he knew it was such a terrible thing to her, maybe he ought to just forget about it. Instead, I simply turned away with a nod.

Striding toward the parking lot, I sighed, hating that I'd let him rope me into his ludicrous scheming.

Still…having Carlisle's favorite little brooder owe me anything I wanted…

I chuckled. He was really going to regret this.

* * *

**A/N: Poor Edward, what on Earth was he thinking? :P Stay tuned for some Jasper/Bella drama!**


	17. Dead Man Walking

**A/N: Full length chapter here from Bella's PoV. **

**I know my OC has been dominating some chapters lately, but she'll be cut out quite a bit from here on.**

**Also, since I hinted that there's some potential for things to happen there, and the story idea is making itself known to me, I will be writing a companion for Calefaction very soon, called Numb, which is going to be a short story from Emmett's PoV, set during the Calefaction time frame, in the Calefaction universe. It'll elminate some unecessary information from this story, so I can focus on my lovely little triangle, though some things that happen will effect Bella's life and be necessary to add.**

**REMINDER: This is not a Bella/Edward story, nor is it a Bella/Jasper story. This is a Bella/Jasper/Edward story! :) Lucky girl doesn't have to choose. So there will definitely be a little something for everyone! :)**

**Again, thanks to all my readers. I love you guys and you make it totally worth breaking through the writer's block and other frustrations that tend to plague me.**

**Hope you enjoy this one!**

**~Ex**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 13

Dead Man Walking

_Brrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiinnnnnnggggg!_

I jumped, glancing up from the game of Hangman I was playing with Lys as the final bell rang. My gaze shifted quickly, seeking the enormous frame of my brother, soon to be interrogator. He was standing at the station he and Lys shared, looking ridiculously endearing in his little apron, sweeping.

I figured we'd have a pretty good head start on him if we hurried. Not only had Mr. Colin, the Home Ec teacher, insisted that Emmett stay behind and sweep up the mess he'd made, but the genius had decided it'd be smart to actually eat some of the pastry monstrosity that he'd had a hand in creating. While Lys insisted that it tasted just as good as ours, a feat which I absolutely doubted, the horrified faces Emmett made while her back was turned were enough to suggest that he was going to regret choking down the tiny bit of blackened crust and two shriveled cherries.

Hastily shoving the piece of paper into my backpack, the half finished message there clearly headed in the direction of 'Bella and Jasper sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G', I tossed my pens in carelessly after it. Grabbing the cuff of Lysandra's sleeve, I gave a swift tug, urging her out of her seat. Alice was still sitting, watching my desperate scrambling amusedly. I was glad to see the expression of worry she'd been wearing for the past ten minutes ease.

"I take it this means that we should find our own way home?" she asked with a wry grin.

I froze, turning to face her fully, my stomach sinking. Crap! I'd completely forgotten that I'd driven everyone this morning. I wouldn't be able to deny them if they asked me to drop them off first, but sitting in the car with Emmett and possibly Edward was definitely not high on my list of fun things to do this afternoon. Poor Edward wouldn't stand a chance once he said something stupid and Emmett and I began to fight over who got to rip his head off first. And if Edward wasn't around to take the brunt of it... I cast a worried glance toward Emmett, whose feverish sweeping seemed to be worsening the mess, rather than cleaning it.

I looked back to Alice, my gaze pleading.

She chuckled, easing her books into her bag before gliding to her feet gracefully.

"You're going to have to face them both eventually, you know."

The idea was enough to make me seriously contemplate running away.

Alice's laughter tinkled like a silver bell. "You'd make it less than a mile, sweetie."

I groaned. "I know, I know. I know I'll have to face them both, I just...Just not right now. Please?" I was mentally formulating other plans should this one fail. My siblings could easily run home in less time than it took for me to drive them, but Alice's whims were often fickle and unpredictable. Perhaps Lys lived close enough that we could walk? Or we could take her bus!

Alice was watching me, a calculating glint in her gaze. "Alright, get out of here. I'll keep him occupied for as long as I can."

"Thank you, thank you!" I exclaimed happily, throwing my arms around her. She laughed softly and hugged me close, before gently pushing me away.

"Go on! He's sure to have heard every word and is probably just fuming over there."

I nodded, grabbing Lysandra's elbow and propelling her toward the door. She grumbled under her breath as she tripped twice and nearly dumped the contents of her backpack onto the floor before she managed to get everything shoved in and the zipper done up.

I continued dragging her until we were out in the relative safety of the parking lot.

She was watching me with a look of amusement as I finally slowed and glanced at her.

"In a bit of a hurry?"

I chuckled bashfully, admitting, "I'm avoiding Emmett."

She seemed to perk up at the mention of his name and I had to bite back my sudden frown. Would it be inappropriate for me to tell her that he was _married_? Certainly Rose wouldn't mind if I marked her territory for her a bit? The words were on the tip of my tongue when Lys asked,

"Why are you avoiding him?"

My cheeks must have gone from ivory to crimson in about two seconds flat. I forgot all about warning her away from Emmett, laughing nervously as I glanced at the pavement. "Oh, he's just super over-protective, and he sorta found out I had my first kiss today…" I neglected to mention that I'd been taunting him with it.

She gave a little squeal, leaning in conspiratorially as she murmured, "With Jasper?"

The tingling heat in my face somehow managed to increase as I shook my head vaguely.

A look of surprise widened her gaze to almost comical proportions as she curiously inquired, "Then…who?"

I really didn't want to tell her. She'd probably look at me with absolute disgust and tell me to hang out by myself. Lusting after not one but two of your adopted siblings? If there was one thing I knew about my kind, it was that they were nothing, if not judgmental.

But on the other hand, did I want a friend I couldn't be myself with? Hiding all the odd little quirks that made me who I was? That didn't seem like any kind of friendship at all.

I watched her from the corner of my eye. She seemed curious and interested; not a single trace of censure apparent in her expression.

I pressed my lips together briefly, as if to hold the name in, before suddenly blurting, "Edward."

Her mouth flew open, as she stared at me in shock. The expression lasted all of ten seconds before she suddenly grinned slyly. "You lucky girl! He's certainly easy on the eye."

Stunned silence met her declaration. She…was okay with it? Encouraging even? What a strange…strange girl.

I eased out of my stupor slowly, grinning, "Too bad he can be a real jerk."

She chuckled, nodding knowingly, "Yeah, he seems like the type."

We chatted quietly about my siblings as we headed for my car, drawing up short as the extravagant blue vehicle came into view. Jasper was leaning against the driver's side door, scanning the crowd. Looking for me?

I had to shake off the small thrill that spiraled through me at the thought. Of course he was looking at me. I had the keys to the car. _Don't be stupid, Bella,_ a nasty little voice in my mind taunted.

Still, I allowed myself a few moments of unabashed Jasper-watching as we stood just a few feet away.

He looked incredibly good, today; Alice had such a good eye for what made each of us look our best.

The hood of his sweatshirt was pulled up, several strands of damp blonde hair sticking out from beneath the scrap of fabric, falling into his eyes. My hand practically itched to reach up and smooth the locks back. I let my gaze drop slightly, lingering briefly on his lips, before sliding down the damp white t-shirt that clung to his body like a second skin. I could just make out the lines of muscle beneath the fabric. My breath stuttered slightly and I jerked my eyes straight back up to his face. His gaze finally landed upon me, caught mine, and a slow smile lit up his face. I thought I might just embarrass myself by fainting.

"Wow," Lysandra breathed from beside me.

I laughed, glancing at her, expecting that we were looking at the same thing. Her eyes were admiring…but she wasn't looking at Jasper.

Jogging ahead of me, she came to stand beside the car, looking like she might explode from excitement.

I tugged my keys out of my pocket as I approached at a more sedate pace. Jasper was still watching me. A tiny flutter of something I couldn't name came to life at his gaze; a sudden, violent little throb low in my tummy. I suddenly recalled the light touch of his cool fingers dipping just beneath the fabric of my jeans, brushing my lower back intimately. My blush spread warmly from my cheeks all the way to the tips of my ears.

I was drawn out of my Jasper-filled fantasies as Lysandra squeaked. "This is _your_ car?!"

I laughed, holding the keys up and jingling them. "Yep. It was a birthday gift."

She turned slightly jealous eyes on me as she asked incredulously, "From who? The pope?"

I snickered as I envisioned a wizened old man handing me the keys to this car; perhaps blessing it or something. "No, from Edward."

She coughed just a little, grinning slyly as she suddenly asked, "Now you said he's single, right?"

"Sweetie, it's not worth it," I snorted.

I thought I heard Jasper utter a quiet sigh at my words, but when I glanced at him, he was impassive as ever.

"Didn't Alice tell you that I was heading over to Lysandra's after school? I thought you guys would be alright to get home."

He nodded slowly. "Mmhmm, I'd heard." He opened his mouth, closed it, paused, and opened it again, as if waging a sudden inner debate. "I was actually wondering if I could tag along?"

I was instantly on the defensive. Planting my hands firmly on my hips, my eyes narrowed, honing in on his. "Did Edward put you up to this?" Jasper was almost never one to interfere with my perfectly normal, safe plans. I expected this behavior from Emmett and Edward, but never him.

He looked slightly offended at my suggestion, answering stiffly, "Of course not."

"So you expect me to believe that you're just interested in hanging out with us?"

He nodded sagely.

"Uh-huh. Right."

Unfortunately, I apparently hadn't stressed quite enough to Lys that my family could take the protective sibling role to the extreme, because she suddenly turned a sunny smile on us, declaring, "I don't mind."

Jasper smiled smugly. "She doesn't mind."

I took a step toward him, glowering. "Well, I do!" I hissed. "Why are you doing this?"

He leaned in, the hood of his shirt shadowing both of us, his lips gently brushing my ear. I gasped softly as his cool breath bathed the sensitive skin there, before the low murmur of his voice rumbled pleasantly through every part of my body. "Bella, I promised you that I would look after you, take care of you. I'm no Emmett or Edward, so please, do not treat me as though I've done something to offend you." I shuddered softly as he brushed a delicate kiss to my neck, just beneath my ear. Every nerve ending seemed to come to life with that small, simple touch. "I just wish to find out more about your friend. I trust your judgment, but we have to think of the family as well."

Frankly, he could've told me that he was going to lock me in a dark cell somewhere and never let me see another human again and I probably would've agreed for the havoc he was wreaking on my senses. I nodded absently and he lightly kissed my earlobe before drawing back. I mourned the absence of his presence acutely.

"Well, if you two are quite finished," an amused feminine voice cut sharply into the hazy warmth my subconscious had become, and I jerked slightly, glancing at Lys, my cheeks burning.

"Okay, well, it seems as though Jasper's coming along, if you don't mind?"

She nodded enthusiastically. I had a feeling she just wanted to get in the car.

I had a sudden thought.

"Do you have your license?" I asked.

She nodded, making a face. "Oh yeah. But my old clunker would probably break down twenty times on the way here."

I laughed, extending the keys, "Wanna drive?"

A brief look of confusion crossed her features, followed swiftly by hope, and finally, she looked as though I'd just told her she won the lottery.

"R…Really?" she asked, tentatively reaching out, as though she thought I'd jerk the keys away and laugh at any moment.

I dropped them into her hand. Somewhere in the back of my mind Edward's voice was protesting heartily. I silenced it mercilessly. "Sure. You know the way to your house better than I do."

She was staring at the keys as though it were a million dollars. Something far too precious to accept from a virtual stranger, despite the obvious longing you felt.

"Um…Alright then."

I reached over and hit the button to disable the alarm and unlock the doors, skipping over to the passenger's side door with a hastily shouted, "Shotgun!"

Jasper rolled his eyes, sliding silently into the back seat.

Lys took her place on the driver's side, adjusting the mirror and seat, before taking a moment to lightly run her hands over the steering wheel.

Starting the engine, she reached into the back, where she'd tossed her backpack and pulled out her iPod. She gestured to the fancy contraption that allowed the connection of the music player, asking, "Do you mind?"

I waved a hand toward it, having forgotten mine, again, and nodded. "Feel free."

She attached the mp3 player, and hit play, before pulling her seatbelt on and easing out of the spot I'd parked in.

I picked up the little purple contraption and began looking through her music. She had a lot of stuff that I'd never heard of before.

I chose something at random, grinning as what sounded like a Japanese pop song came bouncing happily out of the speakers. I looked at her, arching a brow. She blushed, laughing with a shrug that seemed to say she couldn't help what she liked.

I could certainly understand that concept.

Pressing the shuffle button, I settled in. Lys appeared to be a good driver and I wasn't concerned in the slightest that we wouldn't make it there safely. The feeling was helped with the calming presence in the back seat.

A song by The Killers began to play gently, a slightly familiar song, and I perked an ear to the lyrics. Lys was singing along quietly beneath her breath.

"_I never really gave up on breaking out of this two star town. I've got the green light. Got a little fight. Gonna turn this thing around. Can you read my mind?"_

"Edward can read minds," I suddenly blurted.

I regretted the words the very second they'd left my mouth. Perhaps I was getting just a little too comfortable around this girl.

Jasper made a sudden sound from behind me, what seemed to be a strange mutation between a cough and a groan.

Lys glanced at me as we rolled to a stop at a red light, arching a brow.

"Can he?" she asked curiously.

I glanced behind me, silently pleading with Jasper for help. He seemed to think the damage irreversible, because he answered cautiously, "Yes, he can."

She grimaced, training her eyes back on the road as she drove. "That must seriously suck. So what, you can't like, hide _anything _from him? _Ever_?"

I shook my head mutely, again surprised by the ease with which she took all of our peculiarities (a nice way of putting things) in stride.

"Bleh. I can't even imagine. I feel sorry for you guys."

Jasper laughed quietly. "You don't know the half of it."

"I'll bet."

We continued on in companionable silence, save for the eclectic collection of Lys' music.

Finally, we pulled up to a small, red house. The roof looked to be in desperate need of re-shingling and the paint was cracked and peeling in some places. The lawn was overgrown, save for a small patch of yellowed, dying grass beneath an towering old tree.

She grimaced as she noticed my assessment. "Yeah, considering the car, I suppose you're used to something a lot nicer, huh?"

I turned an easy smile on her. "Oh stop that. C'mon, introduce me to your grandmother."

Her eyes thanked me for not drawing attention to her less than rich status, and she hopped out of the car happily, gingerly placing the keys back in my hand as she reached me.

"I'm sure she'll be thrilled that I've made a friend," she chuckled.

Jasper brought up the rear as we headed into the house. It was even smaller than it looked from the outside, but it had that immediate feeling of home. Faded, cozy furniture crowded the small living room, and the air was lightly scented with cinnamon. Pictures of Lys, and who I assumed were her parents and grandparents, seemed to take up every spare inch of wall space, and I chuckled as a particularly large photo of my new friend, missing all four of her front teeth, grinned at me.

She noticed the direction of my gaze and rolled her eyes. "Oh God, don't look at that."

My grin was devious. "I'll bet if we asked your grandmother, she'd be more than happy to show us more pictures just like these." While my parents had never had the chance to do such things, considering I couldn't exactly have people over, it'd been my experience that most parents, and especially grandparents, were more than happy to partake in the national past time of embarrassing their kids.

Her glare was only mock fearsome as she declared, "Don't you dare…"

"Lyssa, is that you?" A strong, but obviously elderly voice interrupted whatever threat she was about to make, and she shrugged her backpack off, tossing it on to the floor. I followed her lead and toed my shoes off as well. A glance showed Jasper doing the same.

"Yeah, gram, it's me," she replied. "I've brought from friends from school over."

"Oh! You made some friends! That's lovely, just lovely! Come on into the kitchen and introduce them! I have fresh snickerdoodles!"

Lys blushed and rested her hand against her forehead, shaking her head.

I laughed and urged her forward.

We followed her through the short hallway, into the kitchen. Though older, the cabinetry having lost its shine, the tiles scuffed, everything seemed immaculate. An older woman was standing at the counter, stirring whatever was in a bright blue bowl. Her gray hair was tucked into a neat bun, and her eyes, as brilliantly green as Lys' sparkled intelligently from her wrinkled face. She was short, standing no taller than Lys herself, and thin as a rail. I absently wondered how she held the large bowl without toppling right over.

Lys smiled brightly, introducing us. "Gram, this Bella and Jasper Cullen. Guys, this is my grandmother, Ethyl Jenkins."

I almost laughed. It was such a grandmother type name. Stepping forward, I held out my hand, uttering the expected pleasantries without thought. "It's nice to meet you."

She enclosed my hand in her slender fingers, her skin feeling as fragile as paper. We shook for several seconds before I attempted to pull back; she held me with surprising strength. I glanced into her face, my confusion evident.

She was staring at me curiously, a small frown creasing her brow. I felt as though she was staring right into me. Right through me.

Suddenly she smiled, though I thought it held a hint of sadness, and released me, exclaiming, "Have a cookie, dear, have a cookie."

I forced a grin, pulling one of the warm cookies off the plate on the counter. Taking a bite, I noticed that she did not ask to shake Jasper's hand, nor did she offer him one of the home-made treats. She did peer at him closely for a moment, before returning to her baking.

I glanced at Jasper, who shook his head, as if saying that we would discuss what had just occurred at a later date.

I nodded, sinking my teeth into the sugary confection once more. It really was a shame he couldn't eat, because these were so good! So soft they practically melted on your tongue, the flavor of cinnamon and spice dancing along the palette.

"These are really good, Ms. Jenkins," I offered with a smile.

She nodded, apparently having finished her inspection of Jasper and myself and finding us up to par, for she turned away, carefully rolling small balls of the dough in cinnamon.

"Recipe handed down for generations. Mother to mother."

The words caused something awful to come to life within me. A pang of sadness that spiraled briefly out of my control with the realization that I would never have that. There would be no children, or cooking on holidays, or recipes handed down.

Jasper placed a comforting hand on my back as I tried to force myself to remember to breathe.

Ethyl Jenkins turned to me suddenly with her shrewd gaze, and smiled warmly. "There are many kinds of traditions, love. Many kinds."

How had she?… She simply smiled her crinkly eyed smile and began to place the cookies on a sheet pan.

Lys was looking mighty uncomfortable by this point and declared staunchly, "We're gonna head up to my room, gram. Thanks for the cookies."

The woman nodded absently as Lys began to usher us out.

"Lyssa?" I heard her call as we stepped through the archway. Lys turned at her grandmother's behest, a curious brow risen. "Be careful."

She blinked at what she must have considered an odd request and nodded. "Yep, okay gram."

* * *

Plopping onto Lys' bed, I glanced around the small room with a smile. Like the rest of the house it was comfy and clean. A small desk housed a computer that looked far too high tech for the rest of the furniture, while the double bed took up most of the rest of the space. A tall, thin armoire stood in the corner, and photographs had been mounted on the walls in some sort of makeshift collage wallpaper. Nature scenes, animal, people, they all blended into one huge mural.

I liked it.

"So, what's the story with your grandmother?" Jasper suddenly asked, sitting on the bed near my feet.

Lys flushed guiltily, taking a seat at the chair in front of her desk. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, why was she regarding us so strangely, why did she seem to know that Bella was distraught, and why didn't she try to get me to eat any of those cookies?"

She shook her head, "I don't…"

With a soft growl Jasper was on his feet, towering over her. "I'm not here to play games. Tell me."

I had just about had it with this crap. Shoving off of the bed, I snapped, "Get away from her, Jasper. Jesus, you guys are all the same. Physical intimidation at its worst. You can't actually do anything to her, you'd kill her."

He glanced over his shoulder at me, his eyes flashing furiously at my interference. I didn't particularly care. "Get away from her, Jasper, right now, I mean it!"

He scowled and drew back reluctantly, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

"Now, you expect her to just, what, spill all of her secrets, because we've been so up front about ours?"

"It's different-…"

"How, Jasper? How is it different?"

"Bella," he murmured, the warning sounding far too much like Edward for my comfort.

I huffed, turning away from him to smile at my frightened friend. "Lys, you don't have to tell us anything you don't want to."

She stared at me with wide eyes, whispering quietly, "She's a witch."

Whoa. What?

"A witch?" I echoed.

She nodded, reaching up to grasp a small stone at the base of her throat, a small black rock attached to a silver chain that I hadn't noticed before. "You know how I can see auras? She can see…I don't know how to describe it exactly. It's like…she can see someone for exactly what they are. Aura, soul, thoughts, feelings."

"What?!" Jasper asked, a thread of panic in his voice.

Lys looked at him, her gaze piercing as she asked quietly, "What are you?"

Jasper shook his head in firm denial.

"Vampire," I murmured.

Jasper looked like he could cheerfully throttle me. Lys looked surprised and intrigued.

"Is Emmett…?" she murmured.

I nodded. "Yes, all of them. All of them but me."

"We're leaving," Jasper declared, standing.

"What? I don't want…"

"I don't care, Bella. We're leaving. Let's go."

I scowled, staring at him defiantly. "No."

"Okay." He wrapped his hand around my arm firmly and began to bodily drag me out of the room.

"Wait!" Lys called, jumping to her feet and grasping my wrist.

"Release her, immediately," Jasper demanded, his voice quiet and full of threat.

"No! Let her go, you can't just drag her around."

Jasper turned suddenly, a low snarl torn from his throat. He wrapped a large hand around her child-like wrist and I could see his fingers tense, tightening around the slender appendage until she gave a quiet cry and released me, her eyes shooting to mine apologetically.

"Jasper!" I gasped in admonishment, horrified to find her cradling her wrist to her chest. Had he hurt her?

He growled, jerking me out the door with him.

"I'll call you!" I shouted, realizing belatedly that I didn't have her number.

I was out of the house and in the car before I could fully register what was happening.

My heart didn't begin to slow until we were several blocks form her home, Jasper in the driver's seat.

I gaped at him, feeling a horrible sense of disappointment with his behavior.

"How could you?" I murmured angrily.

"Me?! ME?!" He bellowed. "_**You told her, Bella! Without thought! Without reason! You told her!**_"

I drew back at the volume of his voice. Jasper had reprimanded me in the past, certainly, but I couldn't recall him having ever taken this tone with me. I stared out the window as a tightness settled in my chest and I blinked back tears.

"We can trust her," I whispered unhappily.

"_**Can we, Bella? Can we? How do you know that? Can you see the future, or read minds? You're only human!"**_

I turned toward him, shocked, my breath stopping in my throat.

"What…Why…" I covered my face with my hands, not wanting him to see the pain there. "How dare you throw that in my face?" I murmured.

"It's the Goddamn truth, Bella. You've compromised us in the worst imaginable way. We may have to dispose of her."

I gasped, my own sadness forgotten as a wave of panic swept through me, paralyzing me.

"What?! No! What? Why?! You can't!" The words came out in a steady, spluttering stream.

"What part of _no one can know_ do you not fucking understand?!" he spat, turning toward me. His face was a mask of absolute fury.

I sobbed, breaking down in light of his rage. "I'm sorry…I didn't…I don't know…She already knew something! Please…Oh my God, please… Don't hurt her because of me," I gasped.

He turned back to the road, eyes dark and resolute. "I'll have to talk to Alice."

Trembling, I leaned back in my seat.

Lys' iPod was still nestled neatly in the dashboard.

As I glanced out the window, terror and fear battling for dominance within, a quiet melody reached my ears.

_The sunrise fills your eyes, cannot hear your cries. Pleading please just go away, I can't take another day of this. No surprise; a surplus of lies freed from the sky. Is there something that I missed? Can't even take another day of this. Lower than piss, have you ever felt like this? Can't recall the last time she avoided it. Lower than piss, have you ever felt like this? Judging by your eyes like crystal balls…_

_Madam Me's predicting that your answer will be yes…_

* * *

I'd been laying in bed for two and a half hours.

The rest of the car ride home had been awful. Jasper had refused to talk to me, and the second we'd set foot in the house, he'd bellowed harshly for Carlisle. Edward had come running, of course, taken one look at my tear stained face and turned on Jasper. Jasper had held his hand up and declared scathingly,

"She told the girl."

And I suddenly found myself on the receiving end of Edward's anger.

Unable to bear seeing that look time after time as Jasper relayed my sin to each of my family members, I'd run up the stairs and locked myself in my room, throwing myself onto the bed and sobbing to my heart's content.

No doubt they were down there right now, lamenting the awful human they'd taken in.

No one had come up to check on me.

I was torn between being glad and upset by that.

No one could yell at me if they weren't up here, but at the same time, they didn't seem to care at all that I was upset.

I grabbed the remote for my stereo off my nightstand, turning the music up slightly. I'd brought Lys' iPod in with me. It had an abundance of depressing music for me to sing along with.

A quiet knock interrupted my pathetic sniffling.

I ignored it, turning on my side away from the door.

It resounded again, more insistent this time, and a voice drawled quietly, "Bella?"

I stiffened as the sound of Jasper's voice singed along my already frayed nerves. He was the absolute last person on this Earth that I wanted to see. "Go away!" I called out weakly.

There was silence, but it was simply wishful thinking to believe he'd actually listened to me.

There was a slight creak, pressure against the oak door, before a solid thud, and a loud clank indicated that the doorknob had just been broken off. I sighed heavily and buried my face in my pillows.

"Bella?" Jasper called quietly.

"Please leave me alone," I whispered miserably. I wanted nothing more than to be left alone to wallow in my own self-pity.

He pushed the door shut and I heard the quiet whisper of his feet over the carpet. I knew he was only making so much noise so I wouldn't be frightened by his presence. Frankly, I was surprised he was bothering, considering how much he hated me right about now.

The mattress shifted suddenly, creaking gently with his added weight. I was infinitely aware of his cool presence at my back.

"Bella?" he murmured.

I drew in on myself, pulling my knees to my chest and wrapping my arms around them.

"Bella, I'm sorry," he whispered.

Hope flared briefly, before being ruthlessly crushed by the weight of my guilt. "Don't. You have no reason to be sorry."

He chuckled, suddenly wrapping his arms around me and pulling my stiff frame back against him. I wanted to deny myself the comfort of his arms, but I just couldn't. I allowed him to tug me close, his chin resting lightly atop my head.

"I do, though. I should never have spoken to you like that."

A quiet sound, half laugh, half sob clawed its way out of my throat. "I deserved it. I told her, Jasper! You were right. There was no reason, and I told her."

He'd begun to thread his fingers lightly through my hair, and I was lulled into slightly relaxing beneath the rhythmic caress.

"You were right, darlin'. She can be trusted."

I froze, my heart stopping suddenly, before violently re-starting.

"What?" I whispered, turning slightly in his arms so that I could see him. His eyes were bright, even in the dim light.

He laughed quietly. "You were right. She's not going to tell anyone. Much as we wouldn't tell anyone of her or her grandmother's abilities. She's interested in us, but not a threat."

"I…I didn't compromise us?" I gasped, feeling almost giddy with the sudden relief that washed through me.

He shook his head, kissing my forehead. "Not at all. I'm sorry for the things I said. I should have trusted you. Alice has informed me that you are an excellent judge of character."

I laughed. "I told you, but you just wouldn't listen!"

He tickled my sides lightly and the past several hours seemed to just melt away. Gone were the accusations he'd hurled at me, gone was the oppressive guilt I'd been wallowing under. We were both sorry, and the other knew it.

"I swear to you, Ms. Cullen, that from now on, I will not hesitate to believe you should you say someone is trustworthy."

I snickered, pushing him lightly.

"And, to prove to you that I have nothing against Ms. Jenkins, I have found her phone number for you, so that you may ensure she's alright." He frowned slightly here, as though remembering the unnecessary force he'd used with my mortal friend.

"I'm sure she's fine," I only partially lied, smiling and suddenly twisting to wrap my arms lightly around him. "Thanks, Jasper," I whispered the words against his neck.

He'd stiffened slightly in my embrace and I drew back slightly, frowning.

"What's wrong?" I murmured, glancing into his face.

He watched me intently, his gaze dragging slowly over each of my features, as though he were memorizing them. He lingered on my lips and my heart raced at a pace to make me light headed.

"Jasper?" I whispered.

He shifted suddenly, the cool weight of his body resting partially over mine, pushing me into the yielding softness of the bed.

I didn't struggle as the images from my dreams seemed to come to life. I'd be a hypocrite of the worst kind if I told myself I didn't want this.

He leaned in, his face drawing closer and closer. Reaching up, he gently tucked several stray curls behind my ear, his fingers lingering on my face. He gently traced my cheekbones, my jaw, his thumb lightly brushing my lower lip.

Lips parting on a soft breath, I kissed the digit.

"Bella," he suddenly breathed, grasping my face lightly in both hands. "You don't know how badly I've wanted to do this."

I wanted to reply that I sure as hell _did_ know how badly he wanted it, but my argument was lost as his lips finally lowered to dust my own, the touch as fragile as the brush of a butterfly's wing. That single, tame touch was enough to send my blood coursing heavily through my veins like melted honey. It seemed to pool just between my hip bones, slowly easing its way downward. I wanted more.

Reaching up, I lightly touched the back of his neck, offering a slight nudge, urging him closer. My lashes fluttered gently, lowering until all that was left was the darkness, and the touch of Jasper's lips.

His breath was cool, mingling with the heat of my own as he pulled back slightly. I shifted anxiously beneath him, desperately hoping he wasn't about to stop.

Instead, he trailed his thumbs lightly along each of my cheek bones, before groaning quietly and leaning in once more.

He kissed a slow trail over my lips, gentle, rhythmic pressure that had me murmuring quietly in anticipation for the next caress. The tip of his tongue traced the corner of my smile, and I gasped. I could feel that smile that I loved so much and forced my eyes open. He was watching me contently.

"Like that?" he murmured.

My blush could've set the bed aflame. I nodded helplessly.

"Hang on darlin', you'll like this even more."

His lips came down once again, confident and firm, and I sighed at the pleasant sensations that streaked through me, stroking nerve endings that I hadn't even known existed. His tongue gently traced my lower lip and I shivered lightly.

He whispered against my lips, "Let me in, darlin'."

I shuddered softly at his request, letting my lips part slightly. He uttered a low growl of approval just before I felt the cool length of his tongue sliding sinuously over my own. A tiny whimper of pleasure stirred somewhere in the back of my throat, lost in the dark depths of Jasper's amazing mouth. Rather than freak out and pull away, as Edward had done, Jasper simply tugged me closer, holding me possessively.

He tasted every inch of my mouth, darting along my teeth, tracing the roof of my mouth, his tongue dancing intimately over mine, luring me to taste him as well. I raked my fingers up through his hair, allowing myself the illusion that I held him where I wanted him. I slid the warmth of my tongue into his mouth, finding him cool and delicious. The faintly sweet taste of him spread upon my tongue, making me light headed with my desperate need for more.

He pulled away slowly, reluctantly releasing my mouth, murmuring gently against my jaw, "Breathe, baby."

I drew a ragged, shuddering breath, realizing that at least part of the dizzying aspect of the pleasure I'd felt was due to the deficit of air to my lungs.

He didn't allow me a moment's respite, despite my human needs, gently tugging my hands away from his hair and dragging them up along the bed. Grasping them above my head, held there by the wrist with one of his much larger hands, he leaned close, brushing damp, open-mouthed kisses along my jaw. I tipped my head, granting him access even as I squirmed lightly against the restraint he provided.

He pulled back, looking down at me, his sudden smile positively wicked.

The expression was enough to send a heated tingle of anticipation straight up my spine.

"Now, Bella, darlin', I'm going to release your hands, but you must keep them right where they are," he murmured.

I blinked at him in confusion, my mind far too incoherent to make sense of his request.

He laughed softly at my inability to answer, leaning in to very gently nip at my lower lip. I uttered a soft gasp at the tiny sting and he gently kissed the area.

"Do you understand, Bella? For the sake of my control, you can't touch me just yet."

I nodded. I'd have agreed to most anything if it meant he'd continue.

I felt his fingers slowly unfurl, releasing me from my makeshift manacle. He began to trail his fingertips lightly, slowly down the insides of my arms, and I laughed softly, a quiet, breathy sound as I instinctively jerked my arms down toward my body.

He tsk'ed gently, pulling my hands back up. He lightly curled my fingers around the headboard.

"Don't move."

I watched him from beneath my lashes as again his hands began their descent. His eyes were on his fingers, moving slowly over my skin. He skimmed slowly down my sides, barely grazing the edges of my breasts and I suddenly found breathing nearly impossible. I desperately wanted more, and arched my back toward him, silently pleading.

My fingers curled into white knuckled fists around the delicate wrought iron headboard as he continued to tease, trailing slowly over my ribs, always avoiding every part of me that seemed to absolutely ache for his touch.

As he made a slow pass over my arms for what felt like the fiftieth time, I finally gasped, "Jasper, please!"

His eyes flew to mine, blazing copper fire, and he leaned in to kiss me once more. His lips slanted over mine, demanding reciprocation as his hand finally glided over the swell of my breast. A soft cry escaped before I could even think to stop it; his palm cool even through the layers of my shirt and bra. The tiny peak pebbled to an aching point and I pressed closer.

"Bella," he murmured heatedly, kissing his way slowly over my lips and down my jaw, before finding my neck. I trembled, ignoring his rule as I reached down to rake my fingers through his hair once more. I needed to touch him.

His teeth scraped delicately over the sensitive hollow where shoulder meets neck and I thought I might come right out of my skin. I urged him closer and he shifted so that the entire length of his body rested atop mine.

Mindlessly, my legs parted and he settled between them, resting against the steady throb that seemed to demand his attention.

The proof of his arousal pressed firmly against me, and I suddenly hated my jeans with a passion for daring to stand between us.

"Jasper!" his name was a breathless plea as he took a small section of my skin between his lips and began to suck, laving the flesh lightly. "Yes, more," I hissed, and he answered with a feral growl. The tension that was building to unbearable levels suddenly heightened as I felt his defenses fall away, bombarding me with his need. How could someone experience this much stimulation without spontaneously combusting?

He leaned up on his elbow, reaching between us to rip the button clean off my jeans. It didn't matter that they were worth more than some people made in a week, I just wanted them off, I need to feel his skin on mine.

When his knuckles gently brushed the elastic waist of my panties, I shuddered.

"Open your eyes," he demanded quietly. I hadn't even realized I'd closed them, but did as he asked, gazing up into the dark passion that drew his face into a beautiful mask.

He eased his hand slowly down, and the anticipation had my heart racing.

"What the fuck is going on in here?!"

We lay there for several seconds, both watching each other curiously, confusedly, as if wondering how the other had managed to suddenly sound just like Emmett.

Emmett.

Oh…Fate, you sadistic bastard.

We both turned toward the door in the same moment, wearing identical expressions of horror.

Emmett loomed ominously in the frame, looking for all the world like an avenging angel.

Shaking his head, he suddenly grinned, a terrifying mockery of amusement, pointing at Jasper.

"You? Are a dead man."

* * *

**A/N: *ducks* Please don't kill me! I know that was an absolutely horrible place for Emmett to intrude, but imagine how poor Bella must feel!**

**But you gotta admit, way hotter than Edward's, right? I told you I'd provide!**

**The songs quoted in this chapter are: "Read My Mind" by The Killers, and "Madam Me" by Alkaline Trio (best band ever!) I own no part of either of the songs, etc, etc.**

**Let me know what you think, and of course, thanks for reading. :D**


	18. Enough For Now

**A/N: Yay for Chapter 14! It's pretty long, like, 8.2k words. I hope you guys like it! I had some difficulties with some stuff, and I always worry I'm repeating words, but meh.**

**Also, I didn't get a chance to answer but a few reviews from last chapter, but all of them were wonderful. You guys never fail to make me smile! :D I appreciate all of my readers more than you can imagine!**

**So, I was thinking, as I'm often wont to do, while I was making these characters into Sims (Yep, total nerd, right here) that it's odd that more guys don't read/write fan fic. I mean, there are plenty of guy authors out there. Why don't they partake in the wondrous pleasures of this genre? If you have any insight, please share!**

**Anywho, Chapter 14 is Bella PoV.**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 14

Enough For Now

It took me approximately 7.73 seconds to find my voice. During which time several thoughts occurred to me.

First, and foremost, I was going to kill Emmett. Kill him. Until he was dead. Or undead. Or whatever the opposite of what his current living status was.

Then, I thought I'd curl up in a little ball somewhere and just let myself starve to death or something. Was there any way to come back from mortification this acute? As my blush rose from beneath my shirt to paint every inch of exposed skin from my chest to my hairline crimson, I decided not.

Finally came a slew of incoherent thoughts as another curious face appeared in the door, Alice, and panic fully set in. How long until everyone came running to see what the commotion was? Did Edward know? What kind of person kissed two different people in one day? And Jesus Christ, could Jasper please remove his hands from my person?

He had yet to move, engaged in a vigorous stare-down with Emmett. I grasped his wrist, desperately attempting to pull his hand away from the sensitive expanse of skin just between my hips. He didn't budge.

"Jasper," I finally hissed. "Get off me!"

He glanced down, appearing mildly surprised that I was still there. Genius. I bit back the sarcastic remark that immediately sprang to my lips, turning wide eyes toward the door where Emmett still stood, his expression thunderous.

"And for the love of God, _get out of here Emmett!"_

Emmett's eyes were disillusioned when they came to rest on my face.

A swell of shame crested as I imagined what he must think of me, broke with a sickening crash as he muttered, "I never would've thought you'd be this kind of girl, Bella." The weight of his disappointment came down on me so crushingly that the room swam hazily for a moment, darkness encroaching, promising relief from this insanity. _There's no Jasper or Edward or Emmett here_, it beckoned. I briefly debated allowing it to sweep me right up into the comfy warmth of oblivion for a while, before forcefully pushing it away. Every single problem would still exist when I awoke. There was no use pretending.

Wiggling out from under Jasper's grasp, since apparently moving was just beyond him at the moment, I snapped quietly, "Shut up, Emmett."

He gaped at my minor state of undress (a button!) as I stalked over to my bureau, snatching a fuzzy blue elastic off the top and throwing my hair into a sloppy ponytail.

"With Jasper, Bells? Right under Esme and Carlisle's roof?"

I scoffed, turning on him, planting my hands on my hips. "You're one to talk, huh?! Flirting with a human when you've been married for a billion years!"

Jasper had flopped onto the bed, watching our verbal and forth as though it was a championship tennis match. I imagined it was probably a lot more entertaining, actually.

Emmett turned toward him with a quiet snarl, "I'm not done with you. And Bella?" His eyes were dark, "My relationships, or lack thereof, are none of your damn concern."

I laughed cynically, shaking my head. "Do you even listen to yourself talk?" I asked incredulously. "Jesus…It's all physical violence first, as questions later with you guys," I breathed, my ire rising by the second. Pulling a drawer open so hard that I nearly yanked it completely out of its frame, I grabbed a pair of hideous, but comfortable pajama bottoms. Tiny robots with rhinestone eyes grinned up at me from the faded fabric. I slammed the drawer hard enough to crack the wooden face. "So, let me see if I have this right. It's none of my concern what you choose to do with your personal life, but when it comes to me, it's alright for you, for all of you, to make my decisions for me?"

"You're morta…"

"_What the hell does that have to do with anything_?!" I exploded, taking a threatening step forward. I was beyond sick of having that thrown in my face. I didn't want to be mortal, did I?! If they were so damned concerned about my well-being why didn't they change me already?

Dropping the pants in my hands, before Emmett could so much as think to answer, I dashed toward him. Me being me, I promptly tripped into him, and he righted me with gentle hands, regardless of his anger. Our eyes met for just a moment, before I suddenly tipped my head to one side, tossing my ponytail over my shoulder, exposing my neck to him. "If you're so worried, just do it already," I breathed, my heart racing. Could he see the requisite vein there, pulsing wildly?

I assumed so, considering that he released me as though I were a leper, taking a single, stumbling step back into Alice. The bedsprings gave a squeal of protest as Jasper leapt of the mattress at the very same moment. His hands closed roughly over my shoulders as he tugged me away.

My name came from each of their lips in quiet admonishment, and I felt the tears I'd been holding at bay for weeks now finally threaten. Not the trembling, self-pitying tears that came after Jasper had yelled at me, or the slow, frightened tears that had slid down my cheeks when I realized that Edward had nearly taken my life.

No, I was long overdue for a hiccupping, snotty sob-fest. And it was not waiting much longer.

But there was no way I was getting away with that here. Esme herself would bust down the door if she heard the gasping, incoherent sob-phrases I was prone to during a real crying jag.

I felt trapped. I didn't know anyone outside of my family and they were the last people I wanted to be around. God dammit, why didn't I have any friends?!

...Friends…!

Taking a slow, shaking breath, I turned slowly toward Jasper, who was watching me intently, as though I might just lose it at any second. Of course, he could feel everything… I crushed the emotions inside of me that were spiraling out of control until all that remained was an unpleasantly oppressive numbness.

"Bella," he whispered concernedly, stepping forward.

I stared at him impassively. "Jasper, may I please have Lysandra's phone number?"

He seemed uncertain for a moment, and I had the feeling that if he denied me this right now, I might just shatter into a million irretrievable pieces.

And I think I would be allowed. After everything that had bombarded me over the past few weeks…

I was falling for Jasper. I was fairly certain that Edward was falling for me. I was mysteriously sick, God only knew how ill, and Carlisle had no idea what was wrong. The human that I'd finally met and was able to befriend wasn't even normal, and Emmett was in some way interested in her. I'd kissed two different men in one day, and been caught doing it. Driving lessons, heat stroke, first kisses…

"Please," I murmured.

He fished the small scrap of paper out of his pocket, and profound relief washed through me.

"Thank you," I whispered, and he nodded.

Ignoring the three of them for now, I wandered over to the bright pink cordless that was nestled on one of the bookshelves. Tugging it out of the charger, I dialed the number that had been scrawled in decidedly male hand writing on the paper, memorizing it as I did so.

As the dial tone faded into the persistent sound of ringing, I glanced over my shoulder. Jasper was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking tired and morose. Emmett stood against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, angry and defensive. Alice was smiling faintly as she curled up on my bed, seemingly unconcerned.

I quickly turned back away.

The time between the first ring and when Lys finally answered seemed like a lifetime. My heart began to race as I realized she might already be asleep, or heaven forbid, not at home.

Just as I was about to give up, feeling dismal, the phone clicked and a bright voice inquired, "Hello?"

"Lys?!" I gasped. "Oh, thank God you're home."

There was a second of silence, that awkward pause where the receiver of the call attempts to figure out just who is calling.

"Bella?" she finally asked. "Are you alright?"

"No, no, I'm not," I admitted quietly, painfully aware of the three vampires, with their super-sonic hearing, all in various states of repose behind me.

"What's wrong? What can I do?" she immediately asked, and I felt a surge of warmth that she should be so concerned over a near-stranger.

"Listen, I know it's a lot to ask, especially after this afternoon, but do you think I could come over for a bit?" I plunged right in, no use in tiptoeing around the subject.

From behind me, Emmett immediately said, "No, you're not leaving this house, Bella."

I ignored him, awaiting Lys' answer.

"Of course, Bella, do you need a ride?"

I thought I might break down right then, but swiped a hand across my suddenly leaky eyes. I was probably in no state to drive.

"Yes," I whispered miserably.

"Oh, sweetie," she murmured. "I will be there in two seconds. You're in that big old mansion of a house that all the kids at school say is haunted, right? Right out in the middle of nowhere?"

I chuckled in spite of myself, "Yeah, that's it."

"Okay, well, not two seconds then, but I'll be there as soon as I can!"

"Thank you so much for this."

"Hey, that's what friends are for, right?"

The phone clicked in my hand and the dial tone blared before I punched the off button. I cradled the device to my chest for just a moment, before setting it back in its charger.

"Bells, I mean it, you're not going anywhere."

I turned toward Emmett, sudden hatred for his domineering ways blazing through me. I wanted to scream at him, to pummel his chest furiously with my fists. Was he so blind to the real world that he couldn't see that he'd gone far past the border of protective and taken a dive right into controlling?

I pressed my lips together for a second, restraining the obscenities that were on the tip of my tongue. When I spoke, I was proud that my voice shook only slightly.

"Emmett, I'm not a child anymore. You have to stop doing this."

"Doing what?" he snapped. "Taking care of you because you're obviously incapable of doing it yourself?"

Alice and Jasper remained conspicuously silent, neither siding with Emmett nor coming to my aid. I found myself surprisingly glad that they were allowing me this battle on my own.

Grabbing a small overnight bag from my closet, I shoved the pajamas I'd been clutching like a life line into it. "How will we ever know, Emmett? You don't even let me try," I lamented, grabbing a t-shirt and an outfit for school tomorrow and adding them to the small sack.

"You're mortal, Bella," he said quietly, as though that just explained everything. The fall back excuse was grating on my very last nerve.

"And? What do you suppose most of this world is made up of, Emmett? Let me tell you, it's humans. Who live their lives everyday and miraculously go unscathed for doing so. Jesus, I have to be the most sheltered seventeen year old on the face of the planet."

He frowned, unwilling to accept my words, "I worry about you."

"I know you do, Emmett, but stop."

He snorted, "It doesn't work like that."

I leveled him with a stare. "Em, listen to me. When I was a child, your protectiveness was like…a bubble. A comfy little ball for me to run around in, safe from harm, because common sense had yet to develop." Jasper made a small noise behind me that sounded suspiciously like a chuckle, and I wondered if he was envisioning a hamster in one of those clear plastic balls like I was. I restrained the twitching of my lips, plowing on. "But I'm seventeen years old. Now, it's nothing more than a gilded cage that I can't seem to escape. There are times when I don't even want to be around you, Em. I mean, you have to let me live a little."

He looked pained, and I regretted the dramatic monologue, but not enough to retract it.

"Now, I need to get away from…" I waved my hands wildly as I tried to come up with a proper term to encompass everything that had happened, finally settling on, "…this, so I'm going to Lys'. You guys have my cell number if you need me."

Alice pulled a magazine off of my bedside table, flipping through it. She offered me a mischievous wink as she nodded, "Okay Bella, see you later."

I tossed my bag over my shoulder, surprised that I was getting away this easy.

"Bella?" Alice called just as I was about to leave the room.

I glanced back with a quizzical arch of a brow.

"We'll be talking when you return." I frowned, the expression deepening as she added, "All of us."

I wasn't that surprised, but I was definitely less than excited for this conversation. After kissing Edward and Jasper, and giving up our family secret, all in one day, I really hadn't expected to get away scot-free.

Trudging down the stairs and out the front door, I found myself on the verge of tears again.

* * *

"Wait, wait. So when they are exposed to sunlight, rather than spontaneously combusting, or even just bursting into flame, they…sparkle? You mean like if someone had dipped them in a vat of glitter, or what? Help me out here!" Lysandra declared laughingly, glancing up from painting her toenails a lurid shade of pink.

Smirking, I scraped my spoon back into the near-empty pint of Ben and Jerry's, plucking a fudgey chocolate fish out of the scoop and popping it into my mouth.

"Maybe glittery was the wrong adjective. More like, they got mauled by a gang of ten year old girls who just learned the joys of a Bedazzler."

Lys snorted, giggling like mad as the nail polish brush streaked a bright pink path over the top of her foot.

I'd made it exactly three miles in her rickety old beast of a car before I'd had a complete meltdown.

Though she'd stop asking what was up when I'd snapped at her for the fifth time, I could still feel her gaze drift worriedly toward me at every stop sign and red light.

As we'd rolled to a slow halt and she shifted in her seat for the umpteenth time, I felt my irritation peak and every confused emotion I'd had over the past few weeks came pouring out of me in one long, ragged sob.

Lys had immediately pulled over, dragging me across the center seat (who the hell drives a car big or old enough to have a third seat in the front?) and into a tight hug.

The entire story had come pouring out of me; a horrible, ceaseless stream of word vomit. My illness, Edward's attack, the driving fiasco, the kisses. By the end I was breathless and shaking from the cathartic exertion.

She'd lightly stroked my hair, murmuring comfort to me the entire time, and I couldn't help but wonder how Jasper could've so greatly over-reacted when it was obvious that this girl was some kind of angel in disguise.

When I'd finally pulled away, blushing at the wide, damp splotches my outburst had left on Lys' shirt, she'd just grinned that contagious grin of hers and declared that I was desperately in need of some Ben & Jerry's. I'd hesitantly inquired just who Ben and Jerry were. I had enough problems without adding two new guys to the mix.

She'd looked as though I just told her I didn't know who the president was or something, such an expression of astonished horror at my ignorance, and promptly peeled out, driving like a maniac until she'd gotten to the nearest grocery store.

By the time we'd gotten home and popped the lids off two of the twenty ice cream containers she'd purchased, I was in much better spirits. Just something about her good-natured personality was completely infectious.

And now, here we were, discussing the vast myths surrounding vampires.

"Garlic?" she asked, swiping a tissue over the top of her foot.

"Nope."

"Silver? Crosses? Churches?"

"Nuh-uh," I replied absently, grabbing a gossip magazine from the pile on Lys' bed and flipping through it.

"Holy water?"

I tossed her a skeptical look.

"So what, they're just like, invincible?"

I flopped onto my back, glancing in her direction. "Pretty much."

She released a long, slow breath. "That's kind of scary, you know?"

I dropped the periodical, not at all interested in the exploits of the latest pop princess. Rolling onto my side, I reached for the open container of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream sitting on the night stand. "How so? They don't drink human blood."

She nodded absently, escaping my scrutiny by glancing back down at her feet. "Well, no the Cullens don't, but there are probably more out there, huh? What if they decide to raise a big old vampire army and take over? There wouldn't be a whole lot we could do about it. They could take over the planet! We'd be like animals! Enslaved! Nothing more than food to our vampire masters!" she exclaimed theatrically.

I giggled, shaking my head. "Can't happen."

She actually looked mildly disappointed at my declaration. Apparently the girl thrived on drama. "Why not?"

"The vampires have laws of their own, as well as a society that enforces them."

She sighed heavily. "Wow. All of this, right under our noses, and we never had a clue. Pretty amazing, huh?"

I shrugged. "I guess since I've known about it forever, it doesn't strike me as very amazing. It takes a lot to shock me."

"Heh. Yeah, I'll bet."

She finished with her toes and flopped down beside me, our spoons clashing for a spot in the cardboard ice cream container before I admitted defeat and turned to stare at the ceiling.

Several minutes passed with nothing but the quiet hum of her stereo in the background. My mind was a whirlwind of activity. Questions, thoughts, ideas…There was one thing in particular that was incessant in its pestering.

"Hey Lys?" I asked quietly.

She glanced at me, both eyebrows raised.

"Do you think I'm…like…" I stumbled over the words, flushing. "I mean, you know, since I kissed two guys, do you think it's kinda…Do you think I'm a hussy?"

She blinked slowly, cracking a wide grin. "Hussy?"

I glared, hitting her with a pillow. "Fine, a whore then." My blush deepened as the word left my lips.

"Why on Earth would I think that?" She seemed honestly confused by the question.

"Well geez, I dunno, I kissed two guys in the same day!"

She laughed. "Bella, you kissed them, you didn't fuck them."

My cheeks flamed at her casual use of the curse. I pressed my cool fingers to my skin, hoping to assuage some of the heat.

"I know! But still. Emmett made me feel like I just…I don't know, like I did something wrong."

"That's crap, Bella. You can kiss as many guys as you want. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Especially not Emmett."

She lingered on the name and I thought I noticed a slightly dreamy look in her eyes.

"He's married," I blurted, completely out of nowhere.

Smooth, Bella, very smooth.

Lys' expression varied for several seconds, shock fading to anger fading to something completely crestfallen, before her smile muscled its way back into place. "Is he?" she asked. I had a feeling she was going for nonchalant, but it just came off as strained.

"Yeah. To Rose, my other sister. She decided to skip the whole school thing this year."

She hesitated a second, before asking, "So…What's she look like?"

After the judgment-free comfort she'd offered me, I didn't want to crush her, but I really didn't want her sniffing around Emmett either.

"Well. Imagine the most beautiful model you've ever seen. Now, pretend she's a lesbian, and she marries the second most attractive model in the world. By some fluke of nature, they manage to procreate. The love child of this strange duo is exponentially lovelier than the combination of even these two gorgeous women should be. Yeah, that's Rose."

Lys grimaced.

"Sorry," I offered.

She shrugged, chuckling. "Meh, what can you do? Figures."

"Yeah."

The silence that ensued was less than comfortable, and she quickly hopped off the bed. "Gonna go grab some more ice cream." The statement was followed with a nervous laugh.

I stared at the empty doorframe through which she'd disappeared.

When had things become so complicated? Why was emotion so fickle; so eager to raise its devious little head and cause trouble where there just didn't need to be?

Throwing an arm across my eyes, wishing that reality was as easily obscured as the dim light from the lamp sitting on the desk, I sighed.

Things would be so much easier if I'd developed a crush on some sweet human guy. Like that kid in my gym class who'd been staring at me all period, much to Emmett's dismay. Mike, I thought his name was. If only I'd gazed into those naïve blue eyes, and returned that innocuous smile, and actually felt something.

Instead, I'd kissed two preternatural beings that were essentially my family.

I was such a mess.

I wanted to blame the almost blinding rage that'd been provoked for my mishap with Edward, but there was no way to turn off common sense completely, even when you apparently had as little as I did, and as his lips had descended I'd known what was happening. I'd wanted it to happen.

Groaning my frustration aloud, both at the idiocy of my actions, as well as the completely inappropriate responses invoked by the memory, I quickly banished the thoughts.

I didn't even _like_ Edward! He was domineering, and sulky, and selfish! If he had his way, I wouldn't so much as blink without his permission. So, he had the looks of a fallen angel, all disheveled auburn hair and intense eyes...and his lips...it was hard to believe that that'd been both of our first kisses; he was quite good at it....

Ah!

The traitorous train of thought went careening off its tracks as I realized the turn my mind had taken.

Bad mind! Bad!

Perhaps I'd written off the brain/foot conspiracy theory too soon.

But really, _why_ was I attracted to Edward? _Please let there be a reason other than the shallow preoccupation of my brain_, I thought only a touch desperately.

I dug through the drama of the past several weeks, forgoing feral snarls and twisted grins, skipping merrily beyond expensive gifts and defensive accusations, seeking the faded childhood memories that seemed to hint more at dream than reality as time elapsed.

And there, outside the snarled mass of miscommunication and misconceptions that had begun to settle over my mind's eye of Edward, was the quiet young man I'd come to love as a child.

This Edward wasn't shouting at me for imagined wrong-doing, or second guessing my choice in human friends (what's a seven year old child really capable of?), or making me question myself and my decisions at every turn. This Edward, while still maintaining a relatively sullen expression, was quick to smile and even laugh when prompted, and wanted nothing more than my happiness. He taught me as much as my limited human brain could keep up with, and encouraged me to see the beauty in everything from spoken and written word, to faded canvases and cracked paint that were established before even he was born.

Where had this Edward gone?

I couldn't begin to guess, but I wanted him back. I didn't want these final years of my human life to be tainted by this growing rift between us.

Perhaps I could do something to allay his fears, assuage his concern that I was going to leave the house and somehow manage to break my neck, or fall into a puddle, knock myself unconscious, and drown. Or both.

I was a klutz, but come on, the odds of that had to be pretty slim, even for me.

I knew we'd be having a discussion soon regarding my behavior, a thought that at once made me shudder in revulsion and caused bile to burn the back of the my throat; perhaps it'd be a good time to bring up others' behavior as well. I doubted Edward would like being called out in front of the rest of the family, but it really needed to be done, and if my courage was up to the task, he wouldn't be the only one.

Emmett...

Fury simmered just beneath the calm exterior of my emotions, and I willed it back. Emmett was definitely going to get a piece of my mind.

And Jasper...well...

I realized that aside from the outburst that I'd already forgiven him for, I had no qualms with Jasper. He was sweet, and funny, and let me live while still keeping an eye out for me. Sure, he was prone to the occasional animalistic display, but he was a vampire. Even Alice had broken the occasional window; and once, in frustration over something I'd been too scared to question, Esme had torn a set of curtains down with such force that the hardware attaching it to wall came clattering to the floor and the fabric fluttered to her feet, in tatters.

Heck, even I had my moments, though I admittedly didn't have the ability to do quite as much damage as the rest of them.

Besides, if I were honest with myself, and I usually was, some of Jasper's more bestial tendencies were enough to make me light-headed, in the absolute best way. The intensely savage gaze, the possessive tread of his hands, the quiet growls...

I blushed brilliantly, feeling twenty three kinds of ashamed for thinking of Edward and Jasper in such similar context within a matter of a few minutes.

What was wrong with me?

It seemed as though every question I answered simply spawned ten more that I couldn't.

I cleared my mind of intentional thought, lest its sadistic nature drive me completely crazy; let it wander where it would.

I managed to doze off before Lys returned; waking to what was easily the most annoying sound in the world.

She had one of those alarm clocks that just begs to be smashed to tiny plastic bits with a sledgehammer. This wasn't music, slowly rising in volume to let you know the day had begun. No ocean or jungle noises to ease your transition from the dream world to the real one. It wasn't even an annoying, steadily beeping sound, utilitarian in its wake up call.

Oh no.

Her alarm clock shouted at you. Literally.

I was jerked out of my peaceful, dreamless sleep by what sounded like a very angry old man. His rise and shine was liberally sprinkled with obscenities.

I groaned, reaching for the general area where I seemed to recall the nightstand stood.

Unfortunately, I'd fallen asleep horizontally and ended up in a graceful morning face-plant, the sheets acting as a terrible parachute.

"Lys?" I asked groggily.

No response was readily coming.

I dragged myself to my feet, yanking the cord for the alarm clock out of the wall when I couldn't find the off button. A glance revealed that my commiserating buddy was no where to be found. Rubbing my eyes, I wandered into the hall.

After a quick pit stop at the bathroom, I slowly meandered down the stairs. I paused as quiet murmuring reached me. I couldn't make out what was being said, but considering one of the voices was male, my curiosity was piqued. I took the remaining steps two at a time, skidding to a halt in front of the small adjoining archway between the entry and the living room.

Shock made my jaw drop. I was surprised it didn't hit the floor.

"What...What are you doing here?!" I managed to gasp.

Sitting on the faded floral sofa, next to the redhead that had introduced me to the wonders of Ben & Jerry's, was Emmett. The curtains were pulled open, revealing that today was going to be a patented Cullen truancy day. Soft streams of sunlight shone through the wide window, reflecting faintly on Emmett's skin. Lys was staring at him with wide eyes, apparently Dazzled.

My wayward sibling looked at me with a grin, glancing over my disheveled appearance with the arch of a brow.

"I just woke up," I defended sulkily.

"I'm here to bring you home," he answered with a shrug and a wry grin. "You weren't answering your phone," he added as an accusing afterthought.

My phone...? Oh, I'd left it in the bottom of my overnight bag...on silent mode. Useful.

"Sorry."

He nodded. "Obviously, we're not going to school today."

This seemed to shake Lys out of her sparkle-induced coma. "You're not?"

I frowned at the disappointment evident in her voice. The expression morphed into a full-blown scowl as Emmett turned a gentle smile on her.

"Can't exactly walk around like this, can we?"

"It's beautiful," she breathed.

Okay. That's enough.

Marching into the room, I grabbed Lys' arm, pulling her up from where she was sitting just way too close to Emmett, and nudging her toward the door.

"Go get ready for school," I ordered.

She wandered out, nearly crashing into the wall as she gazed over her shoulder the entire way.

I whirled on Emmett, who was wearing a similarly dreamy expression.

"What _are_ you _doing_?" I hissed when I was sure she was out of earshot.

If I didn't know that he'd practically invented the look of feigned innocence I might have actually believed the puppy eyes he turned my way. "I came to pick you up. You know, since you stormed out without your car last night."

Oh no, he was not turning this around. "You...You...You just stay away from her!" I spluttered.

Emmett stood slowly, rising to his full, intimidating height. I blinked, tipping my head back to meet his gaze.

"Bella. Don't interfere in things that don't concern you."

I poked his chest roughly, wincing as my finger attempted to bend in ways that were not natural.

"But it does concern me. It concerns the entire family. You are _married. Married, Emmett!_ What would Rose think?"

Lightly grasping my shoulders, he turned me forcibly away from him, nudging me much as I'd done to poor Dazzled Lys.

"Go get your things."

I tried to turn back, but he restrained me, pushing me toward the door now.

"Not until you tell me what's going on, Em!"

"Bella, please. Just do as I ask."

"You mean do as you say? Don't pretend as though I have a choice."

He sighed and I shivered lightly as the cool air ruffled my hair.

"We'll discuss this later, alright?"

I glanced over my shoulder. "Really?"

He gave a resigned nod.

I raced back up the stairs. Lys was sitting at her computer, frowning thoughtfully. I started shoving my belongings into my bag, not bothering to change out of my pajamas.

"What's up?" I asked as the minutes elapsed and she didn't move.

"Why aren't you coming to school today? You're not, you know, magically glitter-tastic."

I laughed at her word choice. "Yeah, but the whole 'family camping' cover kinda requires us all to be gone."

She nodded slowly, suddenly glancing up.

"I like him, Bella. I can't explain it...but there's just...something there."

My irritation, which seemed to be on a relatively short provocation timer lately, spiked and I snapped grumpily, "He's married, Lys. Married. To Aphrodite. For eternity."

She sighed, "I know, I know. I just want..."

"Well, you can't have it, okay?" I interrupted sharply. "Just, leave Emmett alone."

Her glance was reproachful and I knew I was behaving awfully after how nice she'd been to me. I sighed. "I'm sorry, alright? I just... Things are getting crazy enough right now without the idea of Emmett infidelity, you know? Please."

She nodded slowly, standing and holding out a small plastic case that housed a CD to me. I took it hesitantly. "What's this?"

"A 'fuck guys' CD I made for you."

I stared at her for a second, my lips twitching. The irony of this after her confession was not lost on either of us. She suddenly broke into the dimply grin I already considered exclusively hers and I couldn't help but answer with a smile. We both giggled.

"Thanks," I snickered.

She nodded. "See you tomorrow?"

I pulled her close for a hug. "As long as the weather's crappy. Thanks for everything."

She waved my gratitude off as though it were an insect.

Tucking the CD into my bag, I headed back down to Emmett.

The prospect of a family talk was suddenly a lot more appealing.

* * *

"We don't know anything about her! She could be dangerous! It's obvious that someone has to be the voice of reason here, beca..."

"She's not dangerous, she's a human, what damage do you really think she could cau...?"

"Because humans haven't done plenty of damage in the past? All it takes is for one person to believe her, just one..."

"She's not going to tell anyone! We can trust her, Alice even said! And we know plenty of secrets about her too, why are you being so...?"

"I don't think Bella should see her anymore!"

"I think you should mind your own business! Maybe you should focus more on having your own life instead of working so hard to make everyone else as miserable as you are!"

"_Enough_!"

The escalating rabble died away abruptly as Carlisle shot up from his chair, slamming his hands down on the table as his iron composure crumbled to rubble.

I fell back in my seat, panting as though I'd just run a long distance. Screaming to be heard over a group of riled vampires was really quite exhausting.

Carlisle was standing at the head of the table, looking positively disgruntled. Esme sat on his right, frowning unhappily, while Edward was beyond enraged on his left. Alice was smirking impishly at Edward's elbow, while Rose seemed to waver between bored and irritated next to her. Emmett, having scooted away from me and closer to Esme, was growling quietly beneath his breath, fully aware that everyone could hear the muttered insults, and I was so beyond ready to just go hide out in my room for a while. Jasper sat at the end, trying his damnedest to calm us down. It didn't appear to be working.

"Now," Carlisle sighed, shaking his head, "we're all adults here, or very nearly, I think this conversation can be handled in a more mature manner?"

I bit back the "he started it" that sprang to my lips, deciding that wasn't quite the maturity level he was looking for.

"Bella, we briefly spoke with Jasper regarding your indiscretion yesterday." I blushed, fidgeting as all eyes swung toward me. "Alice assures us that there will be no grievous consequences for this action, but I'm forced to ask, you do understand that it is very dangerous for a human to know our secret, do you not?"

I hated being put on the spot like this. How could he even ask that? Of course I knew. I'd known for twelve years. Couldn't he see that this was different? I didn't dare put these questions to him, simply nodding and swallowing against the wretched lump that had suddenly formed in my throat.

"I thought as much," he said with a gentle smile.

"Why'd you tell her, then?" Rose suddenly asked, not unkindly.

I glanced at her with a frown, suddenly wishing that she hadn't skipped on formal education with this latest move. It felt like she was so out of the loop.

"Well, she...I mean, she already kinda knew."

Esme gasped softly, peering at Carlisle in surprise. I thought I heard her question quietly, "The Quileutes?" before Rose scoffed.

"She _knew_? She can't have."

I glared defensively. "Well, she didn't know all of the details, but she sure knew you guys weren't human."

Apparently Jasper had only shared the bare minimum with them. I shot him a look. He simply shrugged in response.

"How?" Esme asked, her expression one of acute curiosity.

I felt slightly foolish admitting Lys' talent. "Well, she can like, read auras and stuff."

Carlisle arched a brow, and I continued headlong into revealing others' deepest secrets, something that I apparently excelled at. "And I guess her grandmother is a witch?"

"A witch!" Esme breathed, grinning. "It's been a while."

Edward interjected quickly, lest we get too caught up in the supernatural excitement and forget that it was 'Bella chastisement' hour.

"I don't care if she's a ghost, or a shape shifter, or a succubus! There was no reason to reveal us!"

My mind reeled briefly with the possible implications of his words. Were all of those things real?

"Edward, if it's no danger..." Esme began.

"This time it's not. What about next time?"

I shifted uncomfortably. "I'm not going to tell anyone else, Edward."

"You said you weren't going to tell anyone to begin with," he countered.

I had no defense against his argument. It was true. I had said that I would take their secret to the grave, whether it be my final resting place or the clever front used to disguise my disappearance from society. And I'd told someone. Not a regular human, no, but that didn't lessen my crime in his eyes.

"You're right. I'm sorry. But I can't take it back, and I don't think I would, even if I was able. The burden of that secret is not slight, Edward."

"I like her," Emmett suddenly declared.

I slanted him a surprised glance. The pressure of the spotlight suddenly shifted off of me.

"I, uh, I just mean that I met her, talked to her a bit, she seems alright." I noticed he conveniently left out the part where he nearly bit her.

I couldn't help but peek at Rose from beneath my lashes. She seemed less than interested.

"Okay, so we have a nice little human friend for Bella who's not a threat. Moving on?" she asked hopefully.

I could see that Edward was on the verge of arguing, but Carlisle quickly cut him off. "I think we can close this subject for the time being."

"Good, then we can talk about this _pervert_ over here!" Emmett declared, jabbing a finger at Jasper.

I groaned and covered my face with my hands. No, no, no, no, no.

"Can we just skip this portion of the discussion?" I pleaded weakly.

"No way! You asked me not to beat his ass, so I didn't. You're not getting out of this."

Carlisle sighed, raking a hand through his hair. As he resumed his seat he looked equal parts amused and worried.

"So what, Jasper and Bella kissed, big deal," Alice declared airily. I wanted nothing more at the moment than to hug her for her dismissive attitude on the subject.

I hazarded a glance at Edward, who was frowning as though in pain.

"It _is_ a big deal! What are his intentions?! They can't just be making out in the house for all of us to hear!"

Oh my god...they could hear? I felt my cheeks warm. Of course they could hear. This just got better and better.

"I agree," Edward murmured. I wasn't sure if he was acknowledging my thoughts or Emmett's statement.

"We have to hear you and Rose all the time! Even with my crappy human ears I've heard some things that you should never have to hear your brother say!" I complained.

Rose had the good grace to look mildly embarrassed.

Emmett, on the other end of the spectrum, grinned proudly. "You should hear what we do _outside_ of the house."

"Ugh! Emmett, no...just no!"

He chuckled, before growing suddenly serious. "It just doesn't seem right."

"Why?" I asked incredulously. "If it's not Jasper, would it be alright if it was some insipid moron from school? Would that be okay? Would anyone be good enough?"

He scowled darkly, before admitting, "Well, no. I just didn't think your first kiss would be with him."

Why the filter between my brain and mouth suddenly decided to so seriously malfunction is something I don't think I'll ever know, but as soon as Emmett had uttered the complaint, I found myself blurting my 'way too much information' reply. "Jasper wasn't my first kiss, Edward was."

The silence that followed my proclamation actually made my ears ring. I glanced at Edward in panic.

Considering our expressions were probably identical, he wasn't much help.

I quickly tried to extract my foot from my mouth. "I mean, that's to say, we didn't...we didn't _kiss_. I don't know why I said that...Because, we were just talking about kissing, and I was looking at Edward, and..."

"You kissed them _both_?!" Emmett choked out. Even Rose looked surprised.

Alice simply laughed.

"I didn't...I didn't _mean_ to! It just kinda happened!"

Taking a page from Alice's book, Rose suddenly leaned forward with a leer. "Were they any good?"

"_Rose_!" Emmett roared.

She laughed, "Oh sit down and stop yelling. She's not a kid anymore, she was bound to kiss some guys eventually."

Emmett looked as though he was actually choking on his fury. His mouth gaped open and snapped shut in rapid fire repetition. He clenched his fists. I had a feeling that Esme was going to be in the market for another dining room table soon.

Carlisle held up a steady hand. "Alright, that's enough. Emmett? I understand that you care very much for Bella, and only have her best interests at heart, but if she's asked you to take a step back, you must accede to her wishes. If she'd liked to kiss every young man in school," he turned to me with a wry grin, mouthing exaggeratedly 'please don't', before returning to Emmett, "then she can."

Emmett sulked like a kid called out for teasing a younger sibling. Rose laughed and patted his leg. He gave her a look I'd become rather well acquainted with over the past day and I quickly averted my gaze.

"However, Jasper, Edward and Bella, I would like to see you three in my study if we're finished here."

I glanced back at Emmett, brow furrowed. Was it my place? I wanted him to stay out my relationships, so did I have the right to call him out on the suspected developments between he and Lys? His eyes met mine and it was almost as though he could read my mind. A worried frown crossed his features and he glanced at Rose.

I bit my tongue. He and I would talk later, but with such little evidence to go on, it just didn't seem right.

When no one spoke up, he nodded, "Alright, this way please."

I quickly leaned toward Alice, "What's he want?"

She smirked, "The usual. He's going to caution you to be careful, vampires are possessive, strong, et cetera. The voice of reason bit."

"Thanks!" I said with a smile, leaning in to peck her cheek.

Hopping up, I headed to Carlisle's study. As I entered, he closed the door behind me. I certainly hoped he didn't think the illusion of privacy did anything for me. Everyone was going to hear everything we said anyway.

I settled into one of the comfy chairs between Jasper and Edward. Carlisle took a seat at his desk, steepling his fingers as he gazed the three of us over pensively.

"I'm not sure what the three of you have been up to," he began, "but I feel it necessary to warn you that vampire/human relationships tend to be doomed to failure."

Edward nodded vigorously, gazing at Jasper and I as though he were some innocent party in all of this.

"You kissed me, Edward," I reminded him coolly. He subsided with a scowl.

"Physical intimacy is dangerous at best," Carlisle continued, as though I hadn't spoken, "and fatal at worst. Control is imperative, and while the both of you have made incredible steps toward this end, I don't know that either of you is ready for such an event. Jasper, while you've adjusted very well to this lifestyle, you have not been practicing it for any great length of time."

Jasper crossed his arms, frowning, "Hey, I didn't try to kill her."

Edward looked as though he was about to speak, but Carlisle interrupted, "Yes, and Edward had his recent mishap."

Mishap. What a vanilla term for attempted homicide.

Edward's glare was nothing short of arctic.

"In light of this evidence, I really must request that any relationship you may wish to attempt be postponed until after we've turned Bella."

He smiled warmly at me and I felt a tiny thrill of excitement at the words. It was only a matter of months before they would allow me to make the decision I'd already decided upon years ago.

"_If_ she decides she'd like to be turned," Edward interjected.

Three pairs of incredulous eyes landed on him.

"Alright," he grumblingly relented.

Jasper nodded, "I believe I'm more than capable of such restraint."

I was less expeditious in my answer. A small knot of disappointment had settled weightily in my stomach. I wasn't sure what I'd been expecting in the wake of two amazing kisses, but a sudden thrust backward into my nun-like ways definitely wasn't it.

I hesitantly nodded. "Alright then."

"And Bella, I don't think I need to tell you that by nature vampires tend to be very possessive, and jealous. I would be more than happy with the mating of any of the three of you, but you mustn't lead them both on."

"I wouldn't…I mean, I never intended…I don't want…!" I gasped, spluttered and sounded generally foolish as I tried to defend myself against Carlisle's words.

Jasper chuckled quietly at my side. I elbowed him, earning myself nothing more than a bruise.

Carlisle grinned. "No, never intentionally, Bella, I know this. I just thought it should be said."

"I don't even think I want to be…what was the word…mated?…with either of them! I just… It was kisses! Just kisses!"

Even Edward couldn't remain stoic in the face of my verbal scrambling, cracking a smirk.

"Of course Bella," Carlisle advised, holding up his hands. "It was just a thought."

My mind couldn't help but replay the vivid dream of several nights past. Edward and Jasper allowing me to meet my demise as I was unable to choose between them.

If someone told me right this moment that I had to choose either Jasper or Edward, my answer would be easy and immediate.

Edward suddenly turned toward me, frowning.

"Who?" he asked tersely.

It took me a moment to realize he'd invaded my mind and had been following my inner monologue.

Frowning, I shook my head, "Don't."

"Tell me," he whispered.

Sighing quietly, I glanced at Jasper, unable to speak the single word. The hurt that invaded his gaze with my non-verbal answer was bad enough.

"I see," he said stiffly, rising suddenly.

"Edward," I pleaded, grabbing for his sleeve.

"Consider your advice taken, Carlisle. I'm going to hunt." He evaded my clutches, striding out of the room, ignoring both my words and the sudden rationalization of my choice that I was silently shouting.

Slumping back into my seat as the door closed, I felt a cool hand come to rest on my shoulder.

"Alright?" Jasper asked.

I nodded. "Yeah. Just been a rough couple of days."

Carlisle made a small sound of sympathy.

"Which reminds me, how have you been feeling lately?"

I didn't need clarification as his gaze swept over me, seeking some physical manifestation of my recent illness.

"Fine. Great, even," I said with a nod.

"Good, that's good." The relief on his face was so exaggerated that I couldn't help but smile.

"Well, if we're all done…?"

He nodded and I rose.

I made it halfway to the door before the room began to spin, reminding me of a rickety carnival tilt-o-whirl. Frowning, I turned back to where Carlisle and Jasper still sat.

"Actually, dad, I think…I'm…"

The floor rushed up to meet me as the darkness that'd been crouching at the edges of my vision descended, Jasper's terrified voice echoing wildly in my ears.

"Bella!"

* * *

**A/N: Oh noez! Bella! :O**

**Hehe. Let me know what you think, por favor! :D I wish I could promise Jasper kisses for reviews, but I'm just too selfish! You guys can have like, Jacob kisses or something. ;P**


	19. Interlude: Closer

**A/N: Short little interlude chapter here. All of my writing plans went right out the window this weekend with the unexpected arrival of some relatives. Meh. And along with my plans went my good intentions of answering ALL of my reviews. I'm so sorry to those who I didn't get a chance to answer, but I just didn't have the time. I love them all and I wish I had a chance to get to everyone, but I just want you to know that I appreciate them all very much. :D**

**To the anon reviewer who stated they couldn't see Bella with anyone but Edward and Alice with anyone but Jasper, why on Earth would you be reading a story that's blatantly labeled: Bella x Jasper? :P**

**Interlude 5 is from Edward's point of view. It was written pretty quickly and only beta'ed quickly as well cause I wanted to get it up right away, so I hope it's alright.**

**The title, by the way, is not from the Nine Inch Nails song, but rather the King of Leons song. If you don't know it, you should check it out on Youtube. Great song. :)**

**Let me know what you think!**

* * *

Calefaction

Interlude 5

Closer

"Bella!"

The single word, combined with Jasper's terrified tone, was enough to make my heart lurch painfully in my chest. If it'd still been beating I was certain it would have stopped.

I'd just descended the final step, intending to lose myself in a particularly long hunt, perhaps stay away for a few days to collect myself, lest I 'accidentally' attempt to tear Jasper's throat out, when the worried exclamation reached me.

I turned instantly, blindly, finding the familiar path to Jasper's mind and sinking so deeply into his thoughts that I felt as if I'd somehow merged with him. Though my body continued to move forward, instinctively seeking the quiet, stuttering heartbeat, I watched the scene playing out through Jasper's eyes.

He'd watched her as she walked away, I saw the lingering memory of her hips, the gentle, unintentional sway with each step. She paused, turned, looking shaken and anxious, confusion pouring off of her in jagged, staggering waves. She glanced up, at Carlisle, and her lips parted on words that Jasper had been to scared to understand as her eyes rolled up and she collapsed.

He was out of his seat and catching her before her name had finished leaving his lips.

I tore myself out of his head as I burst through the study door, demanding answers though I knew there were none to be had.

"Is she alright?"

Jasper was staring at her wide-eyed and panic-stricken, as though expecting her to expire right there in his arms.

The idea did not sit well with me.

I turned to Carlisle, who was already gathering his equipment.

"What's going on? Why is this happening?"

He did not reply, so I sought his mind.

He was frustrated and concerned, ticking off everything Bella had done, ingested, and been exposed to over the past twenty-four hours in his mind. He'd exhausted every medical journal he'd been able to get his hands on, and he still had no answers. He was beginning to wonder if this was even a natural occurrence.

"Get her to her room," he commanded tersely.

Jasper complied, and I followed close on his heels.

She was so pale, her ivory skin ashen and sallow, even in comparison to Jasper's and something within me ached to hear the shallow, labored cant of her breathing.

"She'll be alright," Jasper murmured suddenly, perhaps in response to the pain that threatened to swallow me whole at the thought of losing my Bella.

"Will she?" I asked, knowing that he couldn't possibly have the answer, but wanting the reassurance.

He nodded, looking at me, the smallest of smiles upon his lips. "She's stronger than you give her credit for."

I sighed quietly. Hadn't she told me the very same thing recently?

But it was difficult to trust in such things, especially as Jasper laid her fragile, prone form on the bed.

Carlisle pushed me aside as he entered, striding to the bed with a thoughtful frown.

As he leaned over, lightly pressing his knuckles to her forehead, and then to each of her cheeks, he murmured seriously,

"I don't believe we're dealing with an organic human illness."

Jasper glanced at me, silently questioning what else it could be and I shrugged helplessly. His guess was really as good as mine at this juncture.

"Edward, open the window please?" he asked, before continuing. "There's nothing that would manifest itself in these symptoms, at these random intervals. She's perfectly normal one moment, the next…well obviously…" he gestured toward her.

I'd walked over and propped the neat white window open, allowing a soft, cool breeze to flutter gently in. I slumped into the window seat, picking up a small, pink stuffed cat, it's wide green gemstone eyes staring blankly, that I'd given Bella for her eighth birthday. We couldn't own pets, much as she'd have loved one, and this was my solution. I squeezed it and it gave a feeble meow.

"Carlisle, what else could it possibly be?" Jasper asked, pacing at the end of the bed.

He shook his head, sighing heavily. "I…I don't know."

"He's right," a quiet feminine voice interpolated. I glanced up to see Alice standing in the door, her little pixie face drawn tight with concern. "Don't you think it's odd that I can't see this? Ever? I didn't see Bella growing ill, I never see her sudden fainting spells, I couldn't even see that we would lose her in the woods that night. It's like, something is preventing me, obscuring it."

"Bella had wondered about that, I didn't have an answer for her," Jasper advised gravely.

Alice danced gracefully into the room, not even the weight of her fear enough to curb the innate lissome agility she possessed. She slid in next to me, resting her hand lightly atop mine.

"I'm afraid that I haven't any answers either. I do believe that it's time we start investigating. When this first occurred, what was happening? What new entities have been introduced…?"

"The human," I immediately interrupted.

Alice looked at me. I knew the look, but I was far too concerned with Bella's well-being to take the 'stop jumping to conclusions' expression to heart.

"Did you read this?" she asked carefully.

I scowled, admitting, "Well, no."

"Hm. It can't hurt to investigate, but I honestly don't believe she's to blame for this."

"But your vision…"

She shook her head sharply, looking away from me suddenly. "That has nothing to do with this." The words were neutral, carefully controlled, but held more than a trace of fear. I touched upon her mind but found her shielding her true thoughts by listing fashion designers.

"I'll look into her family," Jasper declared with a nod. I noticed that he'd yet to look away from the still figure that lay on the bed.

"What about the Quileutes?" Alice asked.

"What about them?" Carlisle asked, sounding slightly angry.

"Well, has anyone spoken to them since we've returned? If they know about Bella, they may be upset, and last I checked they still had shaman that were able to perform--"

"We have a treaty, Alice. We have not broken our word, we have no reason to believe that they may have broken their's." The words were spoken in such a way as to signify that this avenue of potential reasoning was officially closed.

Alice squeezed my hand and I peered at her. Her gaze was pleading and I nodded reluctantly. I was not particularly eager to go against Carlisle's rule, but it would be irresponsible not to examine every possibility.

"Alright then," Alice said delicately, and leaned back, watching Carlisle work swiftly and quietly at Bella's bedside.

When he eased Bella up, calling to Alice to help him disrobe her, I looked away uncomfortably.

A quiet laugh filled my mind, along with a teasing, _'Prude'_.

I smirked, shaking my head.

Carlisle worked tirelessly as the sun shifted overhead, easing from morning, to noon, to dusk.

Bella did not awaken.

The moon rose, visible for little more than an hour before heavy clouds settled over our gloomy little town once more, bringing with them the quiet patter of rain.

Still she did not stir.

The hours wore on.

As each member of our family filtered in and eventually out of Bella's room, I didn't need Jasper's ability to know that each minute that ticked by without her awakening caused the fear and panic to raise steadily, until we were all on a finely honed edge, despair threatening.

When the gray light of dawn broke the following morning, with still no sign of Bella's recovery, I finally snapped.

"Change her." I demanded quietly of Carlisle, who was reclining against the headboard, holding Bella close to his side, his fingers smoothing the ends of her hair. He glanced up at me in surprise and I heard Rose gasp quietly downstairs.

"Change her?" he echoed.

I nodded. "Yes! She's not getting better--"

"Edward, you're being impatient," he chastised.

Jasper watched the scene unfolding from the rocking chair in the corner. He made not a single sound in favor of Carlisle nor myself.

"I don't care," I replied, sounding very much like a petulant child, but unable to bring myself to care. "If we change her, we don't have to worry about this anymore!"

Carlisle chuckled mirthlessly, "Are you thinking of her well-being or your peace of mind, Edward?"

The words, coming from a man I considered to be my father, stung. I didn't need to reply, as we both already knew the answer. "I can't take this, Carlisle," I whispered brokenly.

A low, warm wave of calm washed over me, and I glanced at Jasper. He blinked, knowingly staring right back at me.

"Edward, I know this is difficult, it is for all of us, but I will not make this decision for her, regardless of her vehement declarations that she wants nothing more. If there is no other option, I will do as I must, but until that point…"

"What if you're too late?" A vision of her cold, lifeless body flashed before my mind's eye and I almost dropped to my knees.

"Son, I've been doing this for a very long time, you're just going to have to trust me."

I nodded, sinking back into the window seat, watching the roiling storm clouds approach, counting every slow, steady beat of her heart.

Days passed. Esme continued to call us in sick to school. None of us could bear the thought of leaving while Bella was like this.

I sat, still and silent, losing myself in memories of her, at times allowing myself to enter the tranquility of her thoughts. There were no hallucinations this time, no thoughts of myself or even Jasper. Everything was a dull, peaceful blue, as though she were floating on calm seas or flying through cloudless cerulean skies.

It was on one of these retreats that I realized we had trouble.

"Please, I'm worried about her! Can't I just see her?"

The voice, certainly human as it lacked the beatific cadence of vampire speech, pulled me out of Bella's head as surely as if someone had pushed me. I glanced at Jasper, who'd taken a seat next to me some days ago, in confusion, seeking answers from his mind though his expression mirrored mine.

"Who--?" he asked.

I shook my head, unwilling to leave the room to find out, though my curiosity was climbing.

Rose's voice answered politely, but with a note of finality, "No, you can't see her, I'll have her call you when she gets a chance."

The quiet creak of the front door as it began to slide shut, followed by a sudden slam, as though someone had thrown it back open caused Jasper to jump to his feet.

"Listen up lady, I just want to see my friend, okay? Let me in for a sec, or have her come down here, but please. I've got all of her homework and everything. "

Jasper's shoulders shook with silent laughter as he turned to me. "The human girl."

I arched a brow, wondering absently if Rose wouldn't just snap her little neck. I could just imagine the expression she was wearing now. I was almost sad to miss it.

"You know what we are, don't you Red?" Rosalie suddenly inquired, dangerously calm.

"You don't scare me," the girl denied vehemently.

Jasper chuckled. "She's petrified."

I nodded. With good reason.

"Really? I can hear your heart beating from here. I haven't eaten in a few days, actually, and it's absolutely making my mouth water."

I couldn't help but shake my head with a grin at Rose's intimidation tactics.

"Y-You d-don't drink human blood." The mortal definitely didn't believe her own words.

Rose breathed in quietly, and I could just imagine her leaning in, smelling the aroma that was a constant threat to each and every one of our control.

"Rosie," a quiet voice rumbled in admonishment. Emmett.

I heard Alice draw a quick gasp.

Things were certainly getting interesting around here.

"Emmett!" the girl cried in obvious relief.

"Lys, what are you doing here?"

"I want to see Bella. Please? I've been so worried."

His mind was a mess of confusion, but I could already see that he was going to relent.

"I brought her homework."

He sighed quietly and Rose growled softly, "No, Emmett."

"Please?"

"Alright--"

"Emmett!"

He ignored Rose.

I was shocked. No one ignored Rose, least of all Emmett.

"Come on, I'll show you up."

"Emmett!"

Footsteps on the stairs preceded a red tangle of enraged thoughts from Rose. She briefly imagined draining the girl, before shattering the image and racing out into the woods.

The smell of her blood was torturous after so many days of not hunting, but I swallowed against the venom that suddenly flooded my mouth, gazing at the tiny figure that stood in Emmett's shadow in the door.

"What's wrong with her?" she whispered.

"We don't know, Lys. She's been out since that morning I picked her up from your place."

A startled gasp escaped the girl. "_That_ long?! Why haven't you taken her to the hospital?"

"Carlisle's been practicing medicine for a couple hundred years, I think he's got it covered," Emmett replied dryly.

She blushed, laughing softly, "Oh, right. Can I…I mean, I won't disturb her if I…Would it be alright if…"

"Go on in," Emmett said quietly.

Though she moved unassumingly, fairly tip-toeing, I could hear every brush of her feet on the carpet. The instinct to attack as she approached Bella's prone form was strong, but I struggled against it, assisted by Jasper's calming influence.

Her gaze was wide, horrified as she gazed down at Bella's pale countenance. Her mind raced wildly with hypotheses and illnesses that she knew of. She couldn't believe that this was the same girl who had been laughing at her home just four days ago.

Four days…Was it Friday already? No wonder the girl was concerned.

She reached down with trembling fingers, and I read her intentions easily, she wanted to be sure that Bella still _felt_ alive, as she didn't look it.

Unfortunately, Jasper had no such knowledge. He caught her wrist in an iron grip before she was even within an inch of Bella's cheek.

"Don't touch her," he snarled.

A low growl erupted suddenly from Emmett's throat, and he gave Jasper a rough shove, catching the human around the waist and dragging her away. "Hand's off."

I stared at him quietly, trying to make sense of his actions, invading his mind. He was violently torn, concern for Bella and concern for her friend seeming to split him clean in half. I noted with mild surprise that Rose was nowhere to be found in the wild tangle of his thoughts.

Jasper's shock was easily read from his expression. As Emmett set the girl behind himself, he seemed just as bewildered. "I…I'm sorry. I don't know why…"

Jasper resumed his spot beside me, nodding slowly. He was reeling with the idea that Emmett had just physically threatened him for the sake of this nothing mortal.

The girl seemed shaken by the entire encounter, but attempted to diffuse the sudden tension by asking, "Is she going to be alright?"

I shook my head, "We don't know."

"I hope she's alright," she suddenly whispered fervidly. It was the single strongest thought in her mind.

Swallowing softly, she peeked around the edge of Emmett's broad back. "Do you mind if I stay for a little while?"

"Of course," Emmett answered immediately, but the girl was watching me intently, as though seeking my approval. Had Bella informed her of my gift? Her thoughts didn't betray such knowledge. I could only read her worry, her futile hope that she would be of some use.

I nodded slowly, "Certainly."

She walked over to the rocking chair, taking the seat and watching the bed pensively. Emmett moved to stand against the wall behind her, arms crossed. His posture fairly screamed that he dared someone to come near her.

The hours passed, and we lapsed into relative comfort. Esme offered the girl refreshment, but she claimed to be too worried to eat. Alice had come in several times, sitting beside her and talking to her quietly. They spoke of nothing important, but I couldn't help but feel that there was a reason for Alice's civility.

The night wore on and the girl fell into sleep, as humans are prone to do.

Emmett shocked both Jasper and I as he picked her slouched form up and cradled her on his lap, rocking slowly, his gaze advising us to keep our mouths shut and our questions to ourselves.

I was going to have to have a chat with Alice, and soon.

* * *

**A/N: I apologize to all the Rose lovers! And no, she's not going to kill Lys, sp please don't request it. ;P**

**Also, a little closer to figuring out what's up with Bella, hm? Soon, my pretties, soon! *evil cackle***

**Please let me know what you think!**


	20. Confessions

**A/N: Okay. First off, let me just apologize for the ridiculous length of time on this update. I gotta say, I was in a super weird writing funk, and I stared at/rewrote this chapter for a couple weeks. Honestly, I'm really not happy with the way it turned out, though my husband assures me it's great. But you know how husbands are, all biased and stuff.**

**So, here it is.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter that I didn't get a chance to answer. As always, you guys are a huge inspiration for me to keep going at this, even though writer's block has been kicking my ass.**

**** Also, Numb, my Calefaction companion story for Emmett is up, two chapters worth. :) I'm hoping to update it more often, until it's caught up to this story, but if my muse is going to continue to be a miserly little bitch, I can't make any promises. ;P**

**Chapter 15 is from Bella's PoV**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 15

Confessions

I didn't want to wake up.

Waking up meant contending with Emmett's strange behavior, Alice's unpleasant visions and the debacle that was Edward and Jasper.

Waking up meant facing the fact that something was probably quite seriously wrong with me.

Waking up meant enduring the crazy, perverse reality my life had suddenly become.

So I didn't.

I didn't resist the warm, nebulous arms that surrounded me, dragging me into a sweltering darkness that was oddly reminiscent of Alice's descent through the rabbit hole. There were no dreams, or thoughts; just the blissful tranquility of nothing.

I couldn't be sure how much time had passed; minutes, hours, days perhaps?

Frankly, I didn't care.

I'd had enough of real world excitement over the past few weeks to last me a Carlisle lifetime.

Unfortunately, the peace couldn't last.

Eventually, the swirling mist that had seemed content to keep me cocooned indefinitely began to fracture, tiny slivers of light intruding upon the shadow of my solitude. Snippets of conversation reached me, phrases and comments that made little sense in my current state of limbo.

I can't say that I was surprised when it was Emmett's voice that trespassed first. "Do you have any queens?"

A pause, before a contralto I recognized immediately as Lys replied, "Go fish."

"Oh, really?" he asked, his voice dripping with disbelief.

"Yup. Go. Fish."

Silence, and then a scuffle, the sound of a deck of cards scattering. "I _knew_ you had a queen, I saw you pick it up!" Emmett accused, though I could hear laughter in his voice.

Cheater!" she exclaimed in a decent impersonation of outrage.

The sound of footsteps and laughter followed, and the odd exchange faded away.

Like glass splintering slowly, a cobweb of cracks and fissures, the safety of my cerebral asylum began to shatter.

After the meddlesome voices came the discomfort.

Every muscle in my body ached; from my neck straight down to the tips of my toes. A particularly sharp pinch on the back of my hand throbbed every now and again, reminding me of its existence with a vengeance. I was hungry, no, starving. And dear lord, it was about fifty million degrees in here.

While the heat had been tolerable, comfortable even, in my strictly unconscious state, it was stifling and miserable as I swam toward awareness. I tried to kick away the covers, but found my legs unwilling to respond to the mental command. In fact, as I tried, and failed, to voice my request for covers-removal, I realized that every appendage, my entire body actually, felt as though it were made completely of lead.

My complacence faded in light of this development and I began to vainly struggle against the imagined shackles that kept me bound.

Cool air suddenly washed over my feverish skin, and for a moment I thought I'd won, but a wonderfully cold hand brushed my sweat-dampened hair away from my face, and a low voice murmured,

"Just tell me what you need, Bella."

Edward.

Of course; he could read my thoughts.

_It's so warm in here. Please..._

There was the murmur of quiet conversation that I couldn't make sense of, before a cool, damp cloth began to lightly bathe my face and neck.

"Better?" he whispered. The sweet chill of his breath was familiar as it touched my face, and the panic that had followed in the wake of my dramatic thought that I'd somehow managed to contract quadriplegia began to fade.

It'd be okay. As long as my heart was beating, they could make me better.

Exhaustion from my struggle began to set in as the encroaching heat receded beneath Edward's ministrations.

_Thank you,_ I slurred in my mind, before a deep, dreamless sleep claimed me.

* * *

I drifted in and out of consciousness, sometimes peering blearily at the occupants of my room from beneath my lashes, sometimes simply listening to their quiet chatter.

I was pretty sure that I was hallucinating occasionally. The idea came first on the heels of Edward and Jasper's laughter, combining until it had created an enchanting melody I hadn't heard in some time. I couldn't very well see what they had to be laughing about, particularly together. Therefore, it was most likely a product of my imagination; and a fair sight more pleasant than the images I'd endured the first time I'd been ill.

The next imagined conversation was obviously a projection of the fears in my mind. Alice and Rose were sitting in the window seat, judging by the location of their voices. Alice was whispering about a vision she'd seen, the possibility of Emmett and Rose's relationship taking a 'brief hiatus'. Rose simply sighed in response. I couldn't even begin to wrap my mind around _that _ridiculousness.

And finally, a hazy image of Lys and Emmett, twined around one another as they stood at the end of my bed, kissing fiercely. But Lys was my friend, and Emmett would never do that to our family.

Chuckling silently, I pushed the surreal happenings away, settling back into the cozy darkness.

* * *

I came to some time later, blinking slowly as the dim light from my nightstand began to filter through my lashes. My room swam, for a brief, dizzying moment, before coming into focus. I glanced at the window, and though the blinds were drawn, I could see that it was dark. How long had I been out of it?

I pushed myself into a sitting position, feeling light-headed and breathless as I did. I closed my eyes, swallowing back the bile that burned my throat as a terrible bout of vertigo claimed me. I reached up, pressing my palms to my face, wincing as the IV in my hand gave a hard tug.

"Bella?" A low, quiet voice reached me, concern lacing its tone. Emmett.

"Em?" I asked, my voice scratchy with disuse.

"Oh thank God," he breathed, and the edge of the bed dipped with his weight. I felt his strong arms enclosing me; drawing me into a tight hug. His hand rested against the back of my head, lightly massaging my hair and I relaxed against his chest, breathing in the familiar scent of him. He pulled back several seconds later, scanning my face. "How do you feel?" he demanded seriously.

I took a quick mental inventory before responding. "Sore. Kinda tired, surprisingly. And hungry. Very, very hungry."

He laughed, relief softening his features. "Baby Bell, you had us terrified."

Slight confusion crept over me, reflected, I was sure, in my expression, a tiny tingle of panic accompanying it. This wasn't the first time this had happened, and I'd been alright before, hadn't I? Maybe Carlisle had figured out what was going on? What if I was dying? Or worse? Was there worse? I quickly exited my head lest I drive myself insane.

"What…what's wrong with me?" I whispered.

He'd pulled his phone out of his pocket and was punching the tiny numbers vigorously. I momentarily forgot my concerns, amused, as I always was, to see Emmett texting. The whole speed and agility thing just didn't do much for you when your fingers were so big you couldn't help but push three or four keys at once.

"We don't know," he said by way of reply, glancing up.

"You don't know?" I echoed. "I know this is probably pretty serious, but I was alright before…"

He arched a skeptical brow, reaching in to tuck my hair behind my ear. "You weren't out for six days before."

Six days…

Six…

"What?!" I gasped, my hand flying to my chest as I willed my heart to resume.

"You've been unconscious for six days, Bells," he nodded, tucking the cell phone away.

"W..Why?!"

He shrugged his massive shoulders, looking apologetic. "We dunno. Carlisle has some theories that I'll let him discuss with--"

"_Bella!"_ A feminine voice shrieked my name and I flinched as a glance at the door showed the pale figure hurtling toward me.

"Whoa, there," Emmett declared, catching the person (who I now recognized as Lys) by the back of the shirt and giving a swift tug, until she dangled nearly a foot of the floor.

"Hey!" she exclaimed, disgruntled.

I laughed, shaking my head. "It's alright." He began to lower her and a thought occurred to me. I held up a hand, halting his progress, "Wait!"

Lys heaved an exasperated sigh, glancing at her imaginary watch.

"Am I contagious? Any broken bones? Dying?"

Emmett chuckled, shaking his head. "Nope."

"Alright, let her loose."

He set her gently on the floor and she promptly launched herself at the bed, wrapping her arms tightly around me. It struck me as odd, now that I wasn't a sobbing disaster, to be held by someone as warm as I was. I hugged her tiny shoulders as she murmured, "You scared me half to death!" She pulled away, her eyes moving over my face as Emmett's had done. I wondered how dreadful I must look, surviving on nothing but an IV for six days. "Promise me that you'll never do that again," she suddenly demanded.

I laughed. "If you order me a pizza, with pineapple, green peppers and bacon, crust stuffed with cheese, I will promise you anything you want." I was salivating at the very prospect.

"Hey, I don't think Carlisle wants you to eat that crap, Bells, not after you've been sick. Why don't you wait for the others, Esme will make you something." It was entertaining, trying to see Emmett put his foot down about this when he was so obviously reluctant to. I waved him off dismissively.

Lys rolled her eyes, grinning conspiratorially. "Your wish is my command, M'lady." She executed a little bow, winked, and darted off the bed, ducking lithely under Emmett's restraining arm before disappearing from sight."Bella," Emmett sighed, glancing over at me.

"Hey, I'm sick, you're supposed to give me whatever I want. You've watched enough television to know how this works."

He smirked, plopping back onto the edge of the bed. "Do you need a little bell to ring, so we can come running whenever the mood strikes you?"

I nodded solemnly. "Oh yes. And of course, though I'm better, I'll continue the charade long past a point that is wise and you'll find out that I'm actually no longer sick and chastise me accordingly."

He tried not to, I could see it, but he suddenly burst into laughter and I couldn't help but join him.

"How long's she been here?" I finally asked breathlessly, jerking my thumb toward the door.

"Since Friday night," he admitted.

"And today is?"

"Sunday," he said with a chuckle and I arched a brow.

My family had made many concessions for my humanity. Having friends over was not one of them. I couldn't help but wonder how she'd gotten away with not only entry to the heavily guarded 'Cullen Castle', but had also managed to stay for so long.

"How'd she accomplish that?" I asked, honestly curious.

He nodded, understanding the implications of the question. "She was worried about you and pretty much wouldn't leave."

I snickered. Sounded about right. "You guys could've just Dazzled her into leaving."

"Absolutely not!" he exclaimed, so suddenly and loudly that I jumped slightly. My eyes narrowed at the completely excessive response. He collected himself slightly, "There was no harm in her being here. Alice seems to enjoy her company, and she even managed to coax a tiny smile out of Jasper." I snickered. "Edward doesn't much like her of course, but he sees her being here as a chance to keep an eye on her."

At that, I full-out laughed. "Of course he does." Something swiftly came to me, as the little hamster in my brain woke from his six day nap and hopped back on the wheel. "What does Rose think of her?"

He stared at me, his expression holding betrayal, before pushing off of the bed and striding the length of the room with quick, agitated steps.I allowed him several seconds of silence before pushing. "Well?"

He glared at me. "You know she doesn't like her."

I _had_ known that it would be the answer, but to hear him say it, to acknowledge the effects of his behavior was somehow, slightly gratifying.

"Whyever might that be?" I asked, feigning innocence.

He growled, a low rumbling sound, in his aggravation.

"You said we could talk about this, Emmett, I want to talk about it. I assume the others are hunting, this is the perfect time. What's going on?"

He slanted me a glance. "What about you? Kissing Edward and Jasper in the same day…"

"I'm not married!" I countered angrily, the sudden emotion washing over me.

He made a small sound of dismissal and I felt my fury growing. "What about Rosalie?!"

"That's none of your concern, Bella," he scoffed.

"It is! You're talking about my family, Emmett. _My sister!_"

"Forever is a very long time, Bella, to be with one person," he snarled suddenly, his pacing quickening.

I laughed, the sound hollow and unsympathetic. "Jesus, you sound like a petulant child. Maybe you should've thought about this before you chose to--"

"Chose to? _Chose to?_" His harsh bark of laughter closely resembled my own."I didn't _choose_ it! I didn't fucking choose it, Bella! _She_ chose it! She chose this life for me! She made the decision to _save_ me. She made the decision to give me this…" he waved a hand in front of himself, elaborating only with, "_This!" _I decided he must be speaking of his vampire state. "She took me to Carlisle and she had him turn me, without a single thought that I might not want this! So don't preach to me about choices, Bella, because I haven't really made one in over seventy fucking years."

I fell back against my pillows, sails completely wind-less, certain my face must be ashen. I'd accumulated a sort of patchwork of information over the years, regarding the stories of my family and how they'd become what they were. Some of them were more forthcoming than others.

I'd listened to the story of Carlisle's life on many occasions, no detail spared as he shared what he considered to be invaluable knowledge. Esme as well was more than happy to share information regarding her transformation. Rosalie had used her tale as a form of psychological warfare; a futile attempt to terrify me into staying human (though really, it'd just solidified my decision, considering the terrible things she'd endured as a mortal). Edward offered me the barest minimum of details, while Alice could remember nothing, or at least claimed not to. Japer refused to speak of his past; his square on my motley quilt completely threadbare. He would grow furious and resolute if I questioned him too often on the subject, and over the years, I found it best to simply let it lay. He would tell me if and when he was ever ready.

Emmett…I knew that Emmett had been mauled by a bear, and that Rosalie, falling head over heels at first sight, had resisted her blood lust long enough to take him to Carlisle to be changed. Why had it not occurred to me that, so near death, he wouldn't have been able to decide one way or the other?

"You…You didn't have a choice?" I whispered, feeling slightly sick at the thought.

"Of course not," he uttered harshly, and I felt suddenly, incredibly naïve. "None of us did. Most of us were near death and Carlisle so _generously_ offered to give us new life."

"You'd rather have died?" I asked incredulously, feeling a fierce need to defend my father's actions.

"I don't know, Bella! I'll never know. I wasn't given the choice."

I wanted to know, and yet I didn't. I'd heard the story from him only once, with Rosalie interjecting every few moments, advising that she was the only one conscious enough to keep track of the details.

Human curiosity and poor manners got the best of me as I whispered, "What happened?"

He shook his head. "You already know."

I grabbed his hand as he passed the bed, drawing his gaze. "I want to hear it from you, this time. _Only_ you."

He swallowed heavily, taking my small hand in his and staring at it intently for a moment. He sank onto the bed beside me, tugging me against his side. I nestled close to him, as I'd done since I was a child.

"It was the summer of 1935," he began quietly, and despite the very cliché beginning, I couldn't find it in me to be amused. I nodded solemnly; peering up at his face as he carefully maneuvered my hand so my IV tube wasn't cinched. He stared at the far wall.

"Did Carlisle tell you that when you become a vampire, your human memories become very dim? It's almost impossible to recall details of the life you once led."

He seemed to be awaiting an answer, though I was sure he knew very well that Carlisle had explained every minute detail.

"Yes, he did mention that," I replied softly.

"I don't remember the name of the town I lived in," he admitted, frowning.

"That's alright," I soothed, tracing the back of his hand with my thumb.

He shook his head. "I wish I could remember."

I didn't know what to say to that, so I said nothing. Silence settled over us.

Finally, he glanced at me from the corner of his eye, a tiny hint of the standard Emmett smile tugging at his lips.

"It was in Tennessee, though, I know that much," he said rather proudly. "And that day…well I do recall that as well."

I smiled encouragingly.

"Now, I don't think I've ever told you this, but I love to fish. It's not nearly as fun now that I'm a vampire, being able to catch them one handed with my eyes closed and all, but I'm certain I enjoyed it as a human. So on that hot, summer Tennessee day, I was out fishing. There was a creek…" he seemed to struggle briefly with the fleeting memories, before murmuring with some awe, "…it ran behind our house…through a wooded area..." He'd closed his eyes, frowning. "I was supposed to meet up with Mary and John, they lived next door, I'd known them since we were children. I liked Mary."

A tiny grin tugged at my lips at his admission.

"There was…something going on in town, some event that we were all going to attend together." His voice had begun to take on that far-away inflection that meant he was living more in his hazy memories than in the present day and time. "Just one more cast, I told myself. I'd already caught more than enough for dinner, but I was thinking, if I could just catch one more, a big one, for Mary, then maybe the pretty smile she gave _me_ would start to look different from the one she gave her brother."

I couldn't help but laugh quietly here, and Emmett smiled ruefully, shaking his head.

"And I got it, too. Unfortunately, I'd never get a chance to give it to her. I turned back to the house, all proud and gloating, well, you know how I am, and there it was. The biggest bear I'd ever seen. I guess I kind of knew, right then, that that was it. I was going to die."

Shivering softly, I snuggled closer to Emmett, though he wasn't able to provide any warmth. I couldn't even begin to imagine how terrified he must have been. "You were twenty?" I asked, hesitant to interrupt the story, but unable to help myself.

He nodded. "I didn't even have time to react, Bells, it was so fast. One second it was rearing on its hind legs, blocking my exit, the next it was on me. I'd never really felt pain until that moment. It tore me clean open with a single swipe of its massive paw. And then the bastard had the gall to take my fish. While I lay there, bleeding on the ground, it took the damn fish."

I struggled with laughter, "Of all the things to worry about right then, Em, I'd think fish would be the least of them."

He chuckled, "I suppose you're right, but when you're dying, I don't think you're nearly as lucid as you'd like to believe."

Images from the feverish hallucinations that had first claimed me some weeks ago flashed through my mind, and I nodded, "Probably not."

"So there I lay, dying, unable to make so much as a noise. I remember reciting every prayer I'd ever learned, despite putting very little stock in them during the days when the end of my life was so far on the horizon. And then she was there. At the time, I believed her to be an angel, the answer to my hypocritical prayers."

"I thought Edward and Jasper were angels, once upon a time," I admitted.

Quiet laughter. "She was easily the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. I remember her face exactly as she picked me up, undoubtedly gorgeous, yet incredibly strained. And then, it seemed as though we were flying, though I know now we were simply running. I remember it seemed to take almost no time at all, before we'd reached the Cullens' home."

It was odd, to hear him speak of the Cullens as though he weren't a member of the family, though I suppose, at the time, he wasn't.

"She presented me to Carlisle, who I truly thought was God."

My mind drifted to Carlisle and how he might look through a haze of near death. I could definitely see the whole deity thing.

"I thought he was passing his judgment, and when the burning began, that I'd been cast into hell. The idea of spending eternity in such pain was terrifying."

Here, I gulped. I'd been warned more times than I could count of the pain I would be forced to endure upon transformation, and rationally I knew that the size of the person didn't matter; but the idea of big, burly Emmett, writhing in burning that he thought completely unendurable was quite frightening.

Unaware of my thoughts, Emmett continued. "Rosalie sat at my side the entire time. I can't recall the things that she said now, the words of comfort she offered, but I do remember wondering why the angel would allow such a thing to happen to me. Why would she knowingly bring me to such suffering?"

He took a quiet, unnecessary breath.

"Finally, it stopped. It'd been days, though it'd felt like lifetimes. The fire in my veins was extinguished very slowly, the paralysis that accompanied it lifting one finger at a time. Until finally, I was able to open my new eyes on my new life. Carlisle and Rosie explained to me what I'd become and what would be required of me when living with them. At the time, I didn't even think to question it, Bells. I was so grateful to Rose and Carlisle for giving me back my life."

"Knowing what you do now, would you have made the same choice?" I hesitantly asked, not at all sure I wanted to know.

It took him several moments to answer. "I believe I would have. I wasn't ready to die. But I think, after that first awful year, I'd have tried to experience my new life a little more independently. Maybe travelled with Ali, Jas and Ed."

I nodded. The more he spoke, the more I could reluctantly see where he was coming from, even if I didn't necessarily agree with his actions.

"Do you regret marrying Rosalie?"

"No," he said instantly, as though it required no thought, or was something that'd been rehearsed quite often. I arched a brow and he was slow to add, "I just wish we hadn't rushed into it so quickly. But Rosie says we're soul mates."

"Do you agree?"

"I guess I don't really understand that idea well enough to agree or disagree," he said with a shrug. "I love her."

"Are you _in love_ with her?" I prodded. I was definitely pushing boundaries I had no right to, considering I'd told Emmett to mind his own business about my love interests, but I wasn't a crazed older brother, I just wanted to understand.

"Who's in love with whom?" Lys interrupted, skipping into the room and plopping into my rocking chair.

I'd never wanted to strangle someone more.

Feeling slightly antagonistic about the whole thing, I spoke for my brother. "Emmett is in love with Rose." He offered me nothing more than a scowl for my efforts.

Lys grinned wryly, "As often as you enjoy reminding me of that fact, or some variation of it, I know."

I ducked my head, blushing slightly at my almost Emmett-like behavior.

Luckily, I was saved from further eating my feet as a loud crash from downstairs, which I quickly recognized as the front door flying open, resounded loudly. (Knowing who was doing the opening, it probably wasn't just hitting the wall, but had been torn from its hinges and tossed to the floor)

Moments later a dark figure leapt lithely through the second story window, eliciting a startled gasp from Lys.

I, on the other hand, would recognize that lazy smile and mop of blonde hair anywhere.

Edward burst through the door perhaps a fraction of a second after Jasper's feet hit the ground.

Jasper arched a brow, crossing his arms and declaring monotonously, "Told ya the window's faster."

Edward's glare of irritation was marred slightly by the smallest of smiles.

All hint of sibling rivalry vanished as both sets of bright gold eyes landed on my undoubtedly sallow face. They were at the bedside in an instant, the backs of Jasper's fingers brushing my forehead as Edward urgently questioned, "Are you alright?"

I nodded slowly. "I think so. Six days, though!"

He assumed a grim expression at the reminder. I hastily switched gears.

"And Carlisle still has no idea?"

A quiet voice interjected from the door, "I have my theories."

I sat up quickly, leaning around Edward to eye Carlisle, Esme standing close at his side.

"Well? What are they?" I demanded.

He frowned thoughtfully, rubbing his chin. "I'd like to investigate the possibilities before worrying you unnecessarily."

My stomach roiled slightly at the implications of the words. If Carlisle thought his diagnosis would be troublesome to me, then there was no way it could be something simply cured. "Is it something you can fix?" The words trembled slightly, but I was unable to help the slight tremor. Jasper's fingertips soothed lightly over my wrist and a low wave of calm rolled over me.

Carlisle had appeared at the bedside, his smile unconcerned, yet there was a weariness in his gaze that made me feel incredibly guilty for my humanity. He stroked my hair, ruffling the tangled strands. "Don't worry Bella, regardless of what this is, we're not going to lose you."

He'd meant to comfort me, I was sure of it, but the words sent a cold spiral of dread through me.

"I'm…dying?" I gasped. Why was it suddenly so hard to breathe? The air was so thick and my airways seemed to be shrinking. I gripped Jasper's hand with desperate strength.

"Bella, no," Esme breathed, shaking her head.

Carlisle seemed to have already realized his mistake, and quickly dropped into a crouch, grasping my chin and forcing my wild gaze to his. "Isabella Marie Cullen, stop this nonsense immediately," he murmured, and almost immediately the light-headed feeling began to subside. As I stared into my dad's calm face, his kind eyes, the warm security blanket of his love wrapped me up tightly and I knew that regardless of what was wrong, things were going to be alright in the end. Carlisle would never let anything happen to me.

The doorbell rang, interrupting our moment, a tentative voice calling from below, "Hello?"

I glanced at Edward, arching a brow. _You ripped the door off, didn't you?_

He looked bashful, rubbing the back of his neck, and I couldn't help but laugh, the sound taking on a shrill intonation thanks to the slowly receding tension that'd claimed me.

Lys hopped up, looking mildly uncomfortable, perhaps for having witnessed what was a fairly private moment.

"Must be the pizza," she declared cheerfully, hopping up and disappearing within a blink of an eye.

"Pizza?" Carlisle questioned quietly, drawing the single word out until it'd become an entire interrogative question.

I smiled sweetly. "It was Emmett's idea."

* * *

"Please, mom, _please_! It's been almost two weeks! Do you know how behind I am?!"

Esme glanced up from her tofu experimentations, her gaze reproachful. "Bella, love. You know that Carlisle doesn't want you back in school until we have a better of idea of what's wrong. What if something were to happen while you were there?"

It was the same argument we'd been having for the past week. They were treating me like an invalid, and I just wanted to get back to my life. They'd told me not to worry, but they were acting like I was made of glass. It was absolutely frustrating.

"Seriously? Jasper and Alice and Edward and Emmett would be there!"

Esme took a quiet breath, glancing at me from beneath her lashes, before grating some spices into a pan on the stove that actually smelled quite good.

"Bella, if we needed to…" Her gaze flickered to the tiny redhead beside me who was working on her calculus homework just a little too avidly to not be listening.

"Really, mom?" I asked with a grin. Lys had been hanging around as often as possible the past week; bringing my homework, taking notes for me in the classes we shared, and stifling the rumor mill when possible. I figured the latter was pretty much a lost cause at this point.

I suspected that Lys had ulterior motives for her visits. If Rose's behavior was any indication, dragging Emmett out of the house as often as possible, she agreed with my suspicions.

Esme relented with a slight frown. "If we needed to change you quickly, you know that Carlisle would need to be the one to do so. The safest place for you right now is in our home. You'll have an eternity to learn algorithms, hm?"

Grumbling, I rested my head against my open math textbook. "I guess. I'm just going stir crazy, cooped up in the house all day. I mean, come on, nothing has happened for a week. You can't keep me locked up forever!"

"Lying in bed isn't nearly as stressful as school. We don't know what provokes these attacks, Bella, we won't take any chances."

"It's sitting in a desk all day! _Please?_" If she thought I was going to give up so easily, she'd have another thing coming.

"Bella--"

"Actually, Esme, Carlisle has agreed to allow me to take Bella on an outing, a test of her stamina, if you will, to see if she's perhaps ready to head back to school. She's right, we can't keep her in the house for much longer if want to maintain our pretenses." The cool, velvet voice, and the words it spoke, caused my head to jerk up, the page I'd been resting on tearing out of the book, stuck to my forehead. I scowled, and tore it away, glancing into Edward's bemused face.

"Really?" I gasped, not even caring that I'd have to spend all day with Edward, who was probably going to grill me about whatever may be occurring between Jasper and myself.

He nodded, offering, "I won't, by the way." Laughing suddenly, he turned to Lys, "Eventually, yes, you do get used to it."

I glanced at her as she turned pink. "The mind reading?" I asked with a grin.

She nodded mutely, turning back to her homework.

"Where are we going?" I asked enthusiastically, turning excited eyes back to Edward.

"Museum?" he asked with a quirk of just one corner of his lips.

"Oh, we haven't been in such a long time! Yes, please."

He nodded slowly. "Tomorrow afternoon then."

Of all of the members of my family, Edward was the last one that I'd have pegged to go to Carlisle to plead my case of early release.

Was it a gesture of peace?

Had he given up caring for me now that he knew I'd kissed Jasper?

Did he finally see me as something more than the pig-tailed, chocolate-scented child I once was? Someone who was capable of walking down the street without a full entourage of body guards?

I couldn't begin to fathom his motives, but I was thankful for them nonetheless.

I only hoped he would keep his word about Jasper.

* * *

My eyes danced lightly over the framed canvas, and I could only hope that the skepticism I felt wasn't too strongly reflected in my expression.

A single black line had been scrawled over a faded, browning background, splatters of the dark paint marring any mathematic perfection that may have distinguished it as some form of art. It curved slightly midway through, creating a barely there parabola. My brow furrowed as I glared at the painting.

A cool, looming presence at my back indicated that Edward had joined me. I glanced over my shoulder at him, scoffing slightly as I gestured toward the frame with my head.

He arched a perfectly sculpted brow.

I turned back to face the wall, leaning into him slightly. I half expected him to wrap his arms around me, but he simply rested his chin atop my head and stood still as a marble column against my back. I sighed softly.

"What are you thinking?" he asked quietly.

Laughter escaped me before I could bottle it up, even as I reminded myself where we were. It was like being in a library. At any moment a matronly old woman with enormous cat eye glasses was going to hop out and violently shush me. Or so I envisioned.

"Edward, you know what I'm thinking," I chastised with a smile.

I felt him nod against the top of my head. "Mmhmm," he rumbled in agreement. "But humor me."

Being out of the house for the first time in two weeks had put me in a particularly good mood, so I relented to the silly request.

"I was thinking that _this_," I gestured to the enormous waste of space on the wall before us, "is _not_ art. I could've made this!"

His chest rose and fell, a swift, staccato rhythm as he laughed, his breath fanning coolly over my hair.

"What?" I huffed, wondering what exactly he found so amusing.

His hands came to rest lightly along the sides of my arms, skimming down to wrap around my wrists, lightly manacling me in place.

"So you don't hit me," he explained sagely.

I smirked.

"Now, you know I love you dearly," he started. And what a promising start it was.

"You'd better watch it," I warned with a grin, "I've been locked up for a long time--"

"Two weeks hardly makes you a prison hardened criminal," he interrupted dryly.

I tried to elbow him but he held me in place effortlessly. "I'm just saying, cabin fever induced insanity...I really can't be held responsible for my actions."

A quiet chuckle answered my threat, and he murmured softly, far too close to my ear for comfort, "I'll take my chances."

A delicate shudder trembled up my spine as the gentle vibration of his voice spiraled warmly into every limb.

I swallowed audibly, whispering, "I warned you."

A lopsided, male grin seemed to infuse his voice, and I was suddenly rather glad that I couldn't see him.

"Now, this painting here, is quite genius."

Warm fuzzy thoughts of Edward's angel face vanished in the wake of his words. I scoffed disbelievingly.

"It's a black line on a dirty canvas," I argued.

"It is," he agreed.

"A five year old with a paint brush and access to a mud puddle could've produced something similar."

"You think so?" I took a breath to respond, and he released one of my hands to press a palm to my lips.

"So hasty. _Look_ at it, Bella. Look past your initial, surface perceptions."

I peered at the painting, eyes narrowing, finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate as I breathed in the sweet scent of Edward's skin, mingling faintly with the clean smell that was uniquely him.

He quickly pulled his hand away, though I thought I heard him laugh quietly.

I focused on the 'art' once more, trying to figure out what he was seeing that I wasn't.

When I hadn't uttered a single peep in several minutes, Edward murmured, "If I handed you paintbrush, and a canvas, is this what you would do with it?"

I frowned thoughtfully, though the answer came immediately. "Probably not."

"Mmhmm. Do you think this is what many people would do?"

The turn this conversation was taking was becoming increasingly obvious to me and I scowled. "Of course not. But different does not a good piece of art make. Besides, hand someone enough cash and they'll make whatever you tell them to."

"But this wasn't a commission piece, Bella. Does this look like something a rich old lady would want to hang over her sofa?"

I grudgingly shook my head.

"It's easy enough to draw a bowl of wax fruit, or a sprawling meadow of beautiful wild flowers. But to create something so...well, ugly, really; it's obviously a portrayal of what the artist was feeling or perhaps thinking. It's honest, and vulnerable."

He'd gotten all of that from a crooked line?

I stared at it, willing my mind to work properly.

It began to piece itself together slowly, with a simple silent question. What had the artist been thinking that provoked them to create this?

As I stared at the subtly curving line darkly splashed against a dirty background, I began to play with the idea that the parabola, flat and incredibly boring, save for a very minor ascent and then decline, was the artist. Living their daily monochrome life, no end in sight, as the line disappeared into either edge of the frame.

The world around them appeared dull and dank, beautiful in its own savage way, yet lacking light and laughter.

I took a step closer, my hands fairly itching to reach up and touch the chaos of swirling brown and gray. Edward moved with me, as though he were my shadow, and held my hands lightly at my sides.

My eyes were inevitably drawn to the that tiny bump, the curvature that had finally disrupted the monotony.

"What do you suppose they gained, and then lost so suddenly?" I whispered, noting that upon the loss, the line dropped slightly, so that it was suddenly less than equivalent to the quality of life experienced before.

Edward smiled wistfully, glancing at the name plate and brief description of the artist near the painting. "A woman, of course," he replied, shaking his head.

Our eyes met for a moment and I murmured, "But it didn't break him, he persevered."

"He killed himself four years later," he countered, smiling faintly, the gesture almost sad.

"He was foolish. There is plenty in this world to live for. He was just too blind to see it."

"Perhaps the one thing he truly wanted was so bright that the rest of the world could never hope to compare to the brilliance of what he'd seen."

We both knew that we weren't strictly speaking of the artist any longer. I frowned and glanced back into the dark beauty of the image.

"No one's life should so wholly depend upon another's," I argued futilely. "We must make our own happiness."

"Bella," he whispered softly. I looked to him once more, his eyes intense as they locked on mine. My heart gave a stutter, accelerating swiftly. "You are my happiness."

"Edward," the single, low word came out as both a plea and warning.

"I'm in love with you," he murmured, his head dipping slightly so that his breath fanned my lips as he spoke.

The words hit me with the force of a Mack truck. I uttered a quite gasp, shaking my head mutely, unable to fully grasp the ramifications of this confession. He smiled gently, nodding in response, his hand sliding up my back to cradle my head lightly.

"I…I don't know…I mean," I breathed, floundering.

"Don't. You don't have to answer. I just wanted you to know." He inched closer yet, his eyes touching upon every curve of my face. I knew I should pull away, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I wished I could blame a Dazzle, but I was fully aware of my actions, regardless of a swift descent toward incoherency. "I've acted foolish, jealous and possessive where I had no right, stifling your humanity while encouraging you to explore it. I just want you safe. If anything happened to you…I could never live with myself. I wouldn't want to," he admitted.

A sliver of pain splintered through me at the thought of Edward taking his own life, and I turned in his arms, grasping his shoulders lightly. "Edward, don't speak like that," I pleaded, thinking of the suffering Carlisle and Esme would have to endure if they lost not one, but two of their children.

"You are my happiness," he repeated quietly, reaching up to oh-so-gently tuck a curl behind my ear, before cupping my cheek.

I could do nothing but stare helplessly, heart pounding as his lips descended.

* * *

**A/N: Not much to say here. Bleh. Feel free to drop me a review.**


	21. Enlightenment

**A/N: Chapter 16! Woot! It came to me pretty easily, and I hope that reflects in the writing. I don't have too much to say about it, other than I hope you enjoy it.**

**Thanks again to all of my wonderful readers, and especially reviewers, though I only got a chance to answer a handful of you guys last time. XOXO ~Ex**

**Ch. 16 is from Bella's POV.**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 16

Enlightenment

It was one of those amazing movie moments.

Any girl over the age of perhaps seven would know exactly what I meant. It was the moment in every PG-13 romantic comedy that you'd come to idolize, to hope for. It was the brainwashing you'd willingly accepted, until the very idea of a kiss was accompanied with dark, star-scattered nights and fireworks exploding, sparks cascading down around you in brilliant showers.

And when little Jimmy finally catches you by the pigtails, shoving you to the ground at recess, and transmits his cooties via kiss, you're stunned. Blinking into the bright afternoon sun, scalp aching, sand in places you can't even begin to fathom existed, you wonder what just happened.

Inevitably you come to the conclusion that something must be wrong with him, stand up, dust yourself off, both literally and figuratively, and merrily proceed with the delusion.

How long does it take to figure out that those moments don't exist? That bluebirds will _not_ be flying into the window carrying buckets of confetti, and a magical string quartet that exists solely for the purpose of amazing kisses will not poof inconspicuously into the corner to begin playing a heart-wrenchingly gorgeous melody in honor of your big moment?

I'd hazard a guess of around ten years.

While I was short on personal encounters when it came to such experiences, the stories I'd heard had often involved a good bit of drooling and a whole lot less symphonic expression.

I'd been lucky then, considering my first two kisses had certainly incited fireworks, though both had been flawed in their own right.

The kiss I'd shared with Edward had been marred by the overwhelming fury we'd been feeling at the time, not to mention his behavior afterward. Not that it hadn't been good, because it certainly had, but the romance factor had been rather absent.

As I watched Edward's lips from beneath my lashes, mere centimeters from my own, I decided it'd be best to steer clear of any such memories involving Jasper just now.

His laughter, silken velvet with just a hint of an edge, sent cool breath fanning gently across my lips, causing a delicate shudder to slide up my spine. "I _would_ appreciate it if you refrained," he murmured, the words rumbling pleasantly through his chest and into mine. I laughed quietly in response, glancing away from his face. He lightly nudged my chin upward, and my eyes returned to his darkening gaze. "I only hope I live up to your expectations," he whispered, that incredibly sexy half-smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he continued teasingly, "though I don't believe they allow bluebirds in the museum."

Blood rushed swiftly from my racing heart into my face as I realized he'd followed my entire ridiculous inner monologue. I stiffened slightly in his embrace, but before I could decide if I should be outraged or mortified, he closed the distance between us and thoughts were no more.

My lashes lowered, fluttering softly, tickling faintly as they came to rest on my flushed cheeks, obliterating everything save for the solid strength of Edward against me and his infinitely gentle kiss.

His lips touched mine almost tentatively at first as his large hands moved to cradle my jaw. He pressed a small kiss to each corner of my mouth, and I found myself tipping my head slightly, seeking greater connection. He kissed my lower lip, cautiously scraping his teeth over the fragile skin, and I uttered a quiet gasp. He answered with a quiet groan, and as though the small, unconscious sound I'd made had granted him permission neither of us had realized he was seeking, he allowed his lips to slant fully over mine.

I felt the contact straight down to my toes as he eased a hand into my hair, guiding me gently, a sharp contrast to the solid steel of his other arm, wrapping around my waist as he dragged me tightly against his chest, until there wasn't even room for the suddenly sultry air to come between us.

Our surroundings faded into nothingness. There was only Edward and myself. I found my hands exploring his arms, sliding slowly upward to trace the corded muscles, bunching convulsively in his shoulders, before tangling in his hair, pulling him closer yet.

His breath dusted my lips once more, warmer from my heat, yet still cool enough to cause the most delicious awareness of the difference in our temperatures. I inhaled, enjoying the taste of him, the taste of us.

He growled softly, the sound ragged as his hand briefly fisted in my hair, causing a curious throb low in my belly. I felt my hips instinctively arch toward him, knowing that he had the means to ease the sudden heavy ache.

"Bella," he groaned, sounding torn, and in response I could do nothing but seal our lips together once more.

The wall was at my back before I'd realized he was moving us, and he shifted slightly, easing a strong thigh between my own, crushing me against him as though he never meant to let go. A quiet whimper escaped me, lost in the cool depths of his mouth as the slight friction between my legs caused my head to spin.

_More_, I thought desperately, clutching at his shoulders, drowning in the tidal wave of unyielding want that he'd unleashed.

His tongue began to lightly trace the seam of my lips, a slow, undemanding swipe, over and over, driving me out of my mind. I eased them open, granting him entrance, and he shuddered, another feral sound clawing its way out of his throat.

I wanted this. This Edward. The Edward that was honest with me, and with himself, about how he felt. The Edward that didn't apologize for his feelings. The Edward that was able to accept my responses without feeling guilty that he'd somehow unfairly influenced them.

His tongue invaded my mouth in the wake of my thoughts, exploring every inch of warmth he could find. His fingers at my waist clenched slightly, perhaps bruising, but I didn't care. As his tongue stroked suggestively over my own, I felt the solid column of marble between my legs shifting slightly, rocking me against it, and I stiffened, sensations I hadn't known existed rocketing through me, turning my blood molten in my veins.

Perhaps feeling my response, he eased back slightly, the wonderful pressure fading, as he panted against my lips, "No?"

"Yes!" I gasped, "Please, don't stop." My fingers clutched at him, trying to draw him closer, and I leaned fully into the wall, easing my legs apart slightly, hoping to invite him back.

His eyes, black now in his lust, raked over me, and before I could even think to plead with him once more, he had me pinned to the wall, his mouth hard on mine, his thigh rubbing rhythmically between my own. The pleasure that throbbed slowly through me was dark, heavy, like liquid honey, causing my limbs to tingle and my ears to buzz with white noise.

Above the static I heard Edward's voice, tense and low as he placed a trail of cool, wet kisses to my ear, "God, I want you," He nipped my earlobe carefully, the tiny frisson of pain nothing more than another form of pleasure. "You smell so good, you can't even imagine what you're doing to me…"

If the pressure of his own arousal against my hip was any indication, I had at least some idea of what was happening to him… The blush that rose to paint my cheeks crimson was a superficial response, as rather than the embarrassment I know I should've felt, I could summon nothing more than a half-hearted murmur, carried on a surge of lust. "I'm not doing--"

His leg moved torturously once more and I uttered a breathy, shaking cry.

"That," he whispered against the shell of my ear, his breath painting my heated skin causing goosebumps to race up my arms. "That's all you need to do, Bella."

"Edward," I whispered, my eyes fluttering open for a fraction of a second, wanting to see his face, wanting to know that he felt as I did. His eyes were black, watching me with intense heat, his features drawn with need. My hands at his neck urged him closer, and he claimed my lips almost roughly, just as I'd been thinking I wanted him to.

I gave myself up to the kiss, letting the fireworks explode behind my eyes, the shower of sparks tingle over my skin.

His fingers lingered on the hem of my shirt, easing beneath it with excruciating patience. I reached down to grasp his wrist, trying to force his hand to move more quickly, but he just laughed softly against my lips.

"Ahem!"

The sound was loud, but it still took several seconds for it to penetrate the lust-clouded haze of my mind.

A woman's voice, exclaiming sharply once more, "_Ahem!!"_

My mind completely malfunctioned, whether because of what I'd just been doing with Edward, or because I'd been caught doing it, I wasn't sure. I could hear my pulse roaring dully in my ears, a terrible sense of unfulfilled longing raking over my nerves, as though they were exposed.

Thankfully, Edward was much more quick to recover. His eyes traveled my flushed face, a rather wicked grin upon his lips, before he turned toward our interrupter with a genial smile.

"Can we help you?" he asked, a strange timbre to his voice.

The woman in question, exactly as I'd imagined her, cat eye glasses and all, parted her lips on what looked to be a rather outraged response, holding her finger in the air threateningly, before her eyes suddenly went blank as she gazed at Edward.

"What?" she asked quietly.

"I asked if we could help you," he repeated slowly.

The woman didn't make any move to respond.

It took a minute or two for my still recovering brain to catch up, and when it did, I uttered an outraged, "Edward! Don't do that!"

His gaze was innocent as it flashed to me, though his smile was anything but. "Do what?"

I shoved his shoulder, with all the success of pushing an Edward-shaped block of steel, and moved around him, glaring all the while. How he could go from arousing me beyond anything I'd ever known one second, to absolutely infuriating me the next was beyond me. "Stop Dazzling her!"

He sighed in exasperation. "Do you really want to have to explain what just happened between us?"

I glanced at the floor, toeing the white and gold marble with a sulky frown. I could hardly explain it to myself, let alone a complete stranger, and an angry one at that. "Well, no…" I grudgingly answered.

His smug smile made me want to knock his teeth down his throat.

"And do you want to be able to come back here again?" he asked insistently, ignoring my violent imaginings.

I shot him a coy smile. "Well that depends on who's taking me."

I'd never been much of a flirt, but the look on his face was entirely worth it. His eyes went wide, and his mouth dropped open slightly, giving him something of a slack-jawed yokel look.

And just as suddenly, he turned the tables on me.

With a fluid, predatory motion, he leaned over me, forcing me back against the wall, his face close to my own. "Would you like me to take you, Bella?" he asked with a pleasant smile.

I swallowed convulsively, this previously unseen side of Edward proving to be both intimidating and exciting.

I couldn't very well let him have the last word, however, and leaning forward, until my lips were oh-so-lightly touching his own, I murmured sweetly, "Perhaps I'll just ask Jasper."

A myriad of emotion crossed his angelic countenance, ranging from fury and jealousy to surprise and amusement. He settled on one that surprised me as he suddenly threw his head back and laughed. It wasn't one of the feeble, half-hearted laughs he'd often politely throw into conversation, he seemed genuinely bemused by my sentiment, and I shook my head, deciding I'd never be able to figure him out.

Resting an arm behind my shoulders and guiding me past the painting that had begun all of this, the poor curator left staring blankly at the spot we'd just occupied, he murmured, "Jasper hates the museum, as you very well know."

Smirking, I eased out from under his arm as we neared the door, silently reminding him that regardless of the kiss we'd just shared, we were _not_ 'together'. His eyes seemed to answer that it was only a matter of time.

"I'm sure I could convince him," I declared in what I hoped was a suitably sexy tone. "I have this shirt that Alice picked out. You've seen it, I think. Blue and lacy? Cut just a little short?" I eased the hem of my shirt up just slightly, revealing the tiniest bit of skin between my t-shirt and my jeans.

"Bella," Edward growled softly in warning.

I decided to ignore it. Stupid or not, I figured that after this afternoon's events it was a bit late to start worrying about what was the smart thing to do.

"I think he likes it, especially this little bit of skin right here," I murmured, turning away from him and glancing over my shoulder at the pale expanse of flesh just along my lower back.

Smiling darkly, he whispered, "Ten seconds."

I dropped my shirt, whirling to face him confusedly. "Ten seconds?" I parroted.

He nodded slowly, glancing at his expensive watch. "Mmhmm, I'll give you a ten second head start."

"Edward," I laughed, shaking my head.

He turned an entirely serious gaze back upon me. "Eight."

Grinning as adrenaline seized me, causing excitement to race through my limbs, I turned heel and ran out the door, feeling almost giddy.

My Edward was back.

* * *

I wondered how long it would last.

As I traversed the main building on Monday morning, pointedly ignoring the whispers and stares as best as I was able, Lys at my side, Edward at my back, I felt as though I had both a ferocious Doberman and a snippy little Shih Tzu sharing guard duty.

While I could appreciate the odd bonding they seemed to be doing over protecting me from the gossip of my peers, I couldn't decide if I wanted to laugh at Lys, or pinch her as she snapped sharply to a leggy blonde I recognized as the captain of the cheerleading squad, "Hey, hi, yeah, over here? This is Edward. Do you know Edward? Edward, introduce yourself." Edward blinked, remaining stoically silent, though his frown had taken on a hint of menace.

The poor girl glanced between the two of them as though they were crazy. I certainly wouldn't refute the claim.

I brushed my hair forward to cover my blush, hastily continuing onward as I realized Lys' speech wasn't nearly finished, "Edward doesn't like it when people stare at his sister. Do you Edward?"

"I…I wasn't…" the girl stammered.

"I don't want to hear it. Keep your eyes to yourself, got it?"

"I…"

I sent a silent prayer for patience to the ceiling as I rounded the corner, coming to a halt in front of my locker. Sighing softly I leaned forward, letting the cool metal touch my flushed cheek.

"What are they doing now?" a deep voice intoned, causing me to jerk upright, glancing around wildly. Emmett came into focus and I smiled.

"The same thing they've been doing all morning," I complained, spinning the dial to my combination. "She's the mouth, he's the muscle. It's getting real old, real fast."

"Would you like me to take care of it?" he asked, sounding exactly as I felt, an odd combination of irritation and bemusement.

Tugging my Lit texts out of my locker, I shot him a pleading glance. "If you wouldn't mind?"

His smirk let me know that he didn't mind in the slightest, and he tugged me close for a hug, ruffling my hair before declaring, "On it."

A shriek promptly followed his departure, and then a shrill chorus of, "Emmett Cullen, you put me down right this instant!" and other such outraged phrases.

I was just slamming my locker shut when Emmett reappeared, Lys slung over his shoulder, red-faced and struggling.

"Emmett Cullen, if you don't put me down right now…!" she threatened hollowly.

I laughed as he brought a big hand down on the seat of her jeans with a growl, causing her to scream, more in embarrassment than pain, I was sure.

Served her right, considering the crap she and Edward had put me through today.

Emmett strode toward the lunch room as though he were carrying his backpack and not a struggling girl.

I absently wondered if I could convince him to take Edward over his knee…

A chuckle near my ear caused me to jump.

"I don't think so, love," the object of my thoughts declared wryly.

Clapping a hand to my chest, I glared. "Don't _do_ that!"

"I'm sorry," he murmured, in what was possibly the most insincere apology of all time. The very corners of his eyes were crinkled as an amused smile graced his features. I couldn't help but wonder how he could possibly fend off the thoughts of hormonally-charged teenage girls day after day, looking as he did.

Reaching down, he lifted my bag, which I'd dropped at his antics, and laughed. "It's difficult, I assure you."

Resting a hand lightly on my back, he ushered me toward the lunchroom.

I didn't shrug him off as I'd done before, if only for the fact that it seemed as though people were far less inclined to openly point when I was accompanied by someone who could make the threatening glower an Olympic event.

"I assume I'd take gold?" he asked lightly, arching a brow as he looked down into my face.

"Was there any doubt?" I responded teasingly in kind, unable to stay angry with his previous terrorization tactics when he was wearing that grin that I liked so much.

I really didn't know what to think about the turn my relationship with Edward had taken, and we certainly hadn't discussed it, opting to let the car stereo do all the talking on the way home from our museum outing. Upon our arrival he'd judiciously advised Carlisle that I was more than well enough to return to school, and promptly left to hunt.

I'd studiously avoided the dark, spiky-haired head that came bobbing toward me at a frighteningly swift pace, taking the stairs at a dangerous three-at-a-time, and slamming my door shut in such a manner as to implicitly advise I was _not_ in the mood to chat.

I fretted over every little detail, unable to sleep for hours, though I was exhausted; my first time out after my most serious bout of illness wiping me out, though I'd never admit to it.

What if I'd been a terrible kisser? What if Edward reverted back to the broody self-loathing I'd unfortunately come to expect of him over the years, after he'd finally allowed me back in for a while? What would Jasper think when he inevitably found out? What did this mean for Edward and myself? What did he expect? And for that matter, what did I?

I'd finally fallen into a fitful, restless sleep in the early hours of the morning, waking and feeling as though I hadn't even closed my eyes.

"Bella?"

A quiet voice intruded upon my memories, and I blinked slowly, breathing a confused, "Hmmm?"

When had we gotten to the lunch room? And wow, we were even in line? A quick glance let me know that we were not only in it, but holding it up. The irritated students behind me seemed to be holding their tongues only because of the frigid glares Edward was shooting in the direction of anyone whose lips even twitched.

"Bella?" Edward repeated and I glanced up at him with a frown. "What would you like for lunch?" he asked gently.

Oh. Could I have been more out of it? I shook my head slightly to clear it, leaning forward to glance at Monday's lunch lady offerings. I quickly slid the tray Edward had placed before me down the line from the steaming pile of tater tot surprise that looked an awful lot like vomit, pausing briefly before the bagels, and eying a stack of oranges thoughtfully, before an idea occurred to me.

Edward was trying to give me some space, allowing me some human quirks, wasn't he? Well let's just see how well he fared.

I heard a quite groan behind me, and couldn't help the smile that spread slowly across my face.

I walked past the salad, and the pre-made sandwiches, avoided the warm soft pretzels (though they tempted me), and came to a stop directly in front of the deserts. Brownies, cookies and cake were spread on little Styrofoam plates and I eagerly leaned forward, grabbing a piece of spice cake heaped high with more cream cheese frosting than any single piece of cake had a right to.

My eyes strayed toward the looming figure at my back, and I smiled innocently. "I want this."

He struggled, I could see it, the small muscle in his jaw ticking as he refrained from the undoubtedly Carlisle-esque comments that were on the tip of his tongue. I had to give him points for the follow-through, though the dismount was a little shaky as he asked, "Just that? Are you sure?"

"Oh, no! I forgot!" I exclaimed, enjoying it far too much as the look of relief on his face changed to surprise when I placed both a Coke and chocolate milk next to the monstrous slice of cake. "Cake makes me thirsty," I dead-panned.

He reached beyond me suddenly, grabbing a fairly tasty looking salad and placed it next to my lunch choice. I turned a glare on him, warning venomously, "Edward…"

He held up his hands, all wide-eyed innocence. "It's for me!"

I snorted, taking the tray up to the disgruntled woman at the cash register. Edward paid and I headed to the table that already housed my other siblings and a rather miffed looking Lys.

A small wave of relief swept through me at noting Emmett sat on the other end of the table next to Alice. I'd decided that I wanted to know absolutely nothing about what happened between the two of them. I would just have to trust that they knew what they were doing, the same courtesy I'd asked Emmett to extend to me.

I figured I could hold up my end of the bargain for a good day or two before I broke.

I plopped in next to Lys, with Edward sliding gracefully in next to me. I quickly divested my tray of the salad, setting it before him with a grin.

He offered me a sarcastic smile in response, and I dug into the cake with a sigh.

Jasper watched the exchange with some interest.

"Oh hey, spice cake, I didn't even see that!" Lys suddenly exclaimed, reaching toward my tray.

I lightly slapped her little hand. "No way, get your own!"

She responded with a sulk that had Emmett out of his seat and in line before she could even finish her, "Emmett, wait, I was just kidding!"

Shaking her head, she turned back to her muffin.

"You know," I said, around a mouthful of cake, a bad human habit that had Edward blanching and Jasper smirking, "I'm sure Edward would share his salad with you. He's on a special diet."

Alice glanced at me in surprise (I'd made it a point to never call attention to their differences) before the entire table erupted into laughter.

She froze suddenly, her eyes going glassy in that way that meant Alice was momentarily gone from this world.

"Alice?" I murmured.

"What's wrong with her?" Lys asked, watching with avid curiosity.

"She's having a vision," I explained, more calmly than anyone saying those words should.

Jasper was resting his arm lightly around Alice's shoulders, holding her in place carefully as whatever she was seeing in her mind replaced her eyesight.

"M'lady," Emmett's voice suddenly interrupted, as he placed a piece of cake to match my own in front of Lys.

She rolled her eyes, "I was just playing, Emmett."

His crestfallen expression morphed to one of surprise and then guilt as Alice suddenly gasped, "Emmett!"

Rubbing the back of his neck, he slid in next to Lys, who was watching the exchange as we all were, a swift back and forth of our heads between the speakers.

"What?"

"How could you?" she demanded, suddenly sounding quite furious. She jumped to her feet, and I wsa surprised to see she was trembling slightly.

"You don't know what you're talking about Alice, you have no idea what's going on."

She laughed coldly, a shrilly pitched sound, and I swallowed, dropping my fork; glancing to Edward for some insight.

"Don't I?" she asked mockingly. "Think long and hard about what you're doing, Emmett. Mortal life is fleeting."

He rose suddenly, hands crashing down loudly onto the table. I looked around nervously, noting with some relief that only a few sets of eyes were on us. "Is that a threat, Alice?" he murmured menacingly.

"Think about it, Emmett," she replied softly, and dashed from the room without a single further word of explanation.

Emmett slowly reclaimed his seat, looking worriedly first to me and then to Lys.

Mortal life was fleeting…

Was I dying?

What had Alice seen?

I turned to Edward urgently. He was frowning thoughtfully, stroking his jaw. Obviously my cake was the last concern on his mind at the moment.

"What's going on, Edward?" I whispered.

He seemed to wage a swift inner debate, his eyes darting to the door through which Alice had disappeared, and then back to my face. "Hopefully nothing. Listen, I've got to go after Alice. You'll be alright?"

I chuckled, despite the strange happenings that were obviously going to go without explanation. "Other than being insanely curious, I'll survive."

He pushed away from the table, dropping a swift kiss to the top of my head, and strode from the room. He would catch Alice fairly quickly, I was sure. Hopefully he'd be able to drag her back here and make her explain whatever it was they'd both seen.

"What do you suppose that was about?" a quiet voice drawled near my ear as I picked up my fork and snagged the salad that had been in front of Edward. Cake was all fine and good, but it really wasn't suitable as a stand alone lunch. I munched on a cucumber thoughtfully, eventually shaking my head.

"I have no idea, Jas. Alice's words were rather cryptic. Intentionally, I imagine. I'm just worried. With everything that's been happening…"

A soft, warm wave of calm swept over me as Jasper's hand came to rest lightly on the back of my own, his thumb feathering over the pulse in my wrist.

I leaned into him with a sigh.

"So you and Edward seem to be getting along fairly well," he surprised me by saying.

I glanced up at him curiously, wondering where this had come from. A guilty flush tingled in my cheeks and I looked away to silently study the table for a few moments.

"Um, yeah, I guess so. He's been better lately."

"He told you, didn't he?" he questioned, a bitter note in his voice resounding discordantly.

I knew what he was speaking of, but this was not particularly something I wanted to talk about with him, not when I hadn't even figured it out myself. I pulled away from him slightly. "Told me what?"

My acting skills were right on par with my coordination and I heard Jasper scoff quietly.

"What did you say to him?"

"He knows that I don't feel the same," I whispered, giving up on pretense and poking at the remnants of my lunch.

"Are you sure? That he knows?" he asked insistently.

I scowled, nodding. "Well, I sure didn't say it back, I think that'd be a pretty clear cut sign."

He fell quiet and a quick glance showed that I'd apparently manage to appease him, at least for now.

I sighed heavily.

As far as I was concerned, this day couldn't end soon enough.

* * *

Jasper and I rode home in relatively companionable silence, and I was incredibly thankful that he didn't bring up our less than pleasant lunch conversation.

Edward and Alice hadn't returned for the final three periods of the day, and despite my initial pleading, Jasper had convinced me that I'd missed too much school recently to simply cut out early due to curiosity. If it was a matter of life or death, they'd have let us know, he assured me. I knew he was right, but it didn't stop me from pouting at him all through Lit.

We'd left Lys at the bus stop, her laughing explanation that she'd had enough excitement for a while followed with a quickly whispered, "Text me when you find out what's going on!"

Emmett had surprisingly declined to come home.

That was my first sign, I'd later realize.

He'd declared that he needed to hunt, immediately, and would meet us at home. Considering what had happened at lunch, I found this beyond strange, but before I could even think to begin interrogating him, he'd disappeared into the woods surrounding the school.

And so it came to pass that only Jasper and myself inhabited my car as we pulled up the long, secluded drive.

I knew instantly that something was wrong.

Rosalie's shiny red BMW was sitting in front of the house. As far as I knew, she'd rather cut off her own arms than leave her baby out, exposed to the elements.

I parked crookedly, killing the engine before jumping hastily out of the car. Because I was in a hurry, I, of course, tripped over my own feet, nearly taking a gravel bath before Jasper caught me with a low, "Careful, darlin'."

Normally such a close proximity, combined with that faint southern drawl was enough to send me spiraling into a hormone-driven fit, but for now my brain harshly brought my body into line, scrambling to make sense of what was happening.

We ran into the house.

Carlisle was seated in the living room, in one of the wide, leather wing chairs, his posture weary. He glanced up at me, and I felt dread steadily creep through me, tiny icy hands clutching at my veins. The light that normally resided in his gaze, that tiny spark of laughter that I'd always associated with his golden eyes, seemed to have flickered to almost nothingness. The sadness that had replaced it was almost too much for me to bear.

"What--?" I gasped, though before he had a chance to reply, I heard a shout that could have come from no one but Alice from one of the rooms above. I quickly ducked under Jasper's arm and took to the stairs.

He was my shadow, steadying me when I stumbled, as we passed the empty rooms. Mine, Jasper's, Edward's…until we skidded to a stop in front of Rose and Emmett's bedroom. Well, I skidded, Jasper moved with all the fluidity of a predatory feline, slinking to a steady stop as though he hadn't been moving at all.

My eyes darted frantically around the room, assessing the situation.

Rose stood in front of her closet, yanking items out carelessly and tossing them into an open suitcase on the bed. Edward was plucking the garments out of the luggage as swiftly as she was packing them. Alice was pacing, her lips moving swiftly, though I couldn't make out the words. Esme sat quietly on the bed, still as a statue, looking much as Carlisle had.

"M-mom?" I whispered, reaching toward her worriedly.

"Oh Bella," she murmured, swallowing convulsively, though she made no move to come to me.

They were seriously freaking me out. Someone needed to tell me what was going on… _Right now._

"W…What is all this?!" I demanded, the question so shrill it was nearly a shriek.

All eyes turned toward me, four pairs concerned, the final, Rosalie's resolute and morose.

She approached me without a sound. Her face held a gentle smile that I hadn't seen from her in some time. It worried me.

"Rose…What's happening?" The urgency I felt couldn't possibly be expressed more as I spoke the question so swiftly it slurred into a single word.

She took my face gently in her graceful hands, leaning in to brush a kiss to my forehead, the touch little more than a butterfly wing caress.

My terror began to rise more swiftly now, my heart racing to a point that almost hurt.

"Rose, please…" I begged, feeling this afternoon's lunch confection threatening to make a reappearance.

Tipping her head slowly to one side, she watched me carefully as with three words she tore my entire world apart.

"Bella, I'm leaving."

* * *

**A/N: No death threats please. :P Toward me OR Lys. ^.~ Let me know what you thought! The next chapter is pretty much writing itself in my mind so I may be able to get it up this weekend.**


	22. Bitter Pill

**A/N: Well, I know it's been a while, my apologies for that, but I was kind of feeling burnt out on the whole Calefaction universe. However, one reviewer in particular has the ability to kinda kick my butt into gear, so I finally made myself sit down, opened up Word, and all of this flowed out. Apparently my muse was more than ready to go, but my procrastination was holding her up. :P**

**Anyway, here's Chapter 17, from Bella's PoV. Full of angsty drama, though this should be the last of it for a while, and for those of you thirsty for the lemonade, it's in the making. I had to get this all set up before moving on. Be on the lookout for some tasty Jasper in Chapter 18. (Though we will have a Jasper PoV mini chapter up next)**

**One quick thing, as it's caused some confusion. I realize this story is listed under the Bella x Jasper section, causing some questions, since we've got her fairly making out with Edward. When all is said and done, this will be a BxExJ story, though they currently don't make a category for that. I apologize if this has been cause for any misunderstandings through reviews/messages/ANs. As always, feel free to send me a PM if you need any clarifications.**

**Also, I know I didn't get to answer hardly any of you last time, but thanks so much to all of my reviewers. Hit 1000 reviews! Woot!**

**So here we go, it's a bit shorter than usual, but hopefully it's up to par. Let me know what you think!**

_Walking away, it's not the same as running, is it to you now…that you've run this in the ground._

_You say take this, this medicine is just what you deserve. Swallow, choke and die._

_This bitter pill is leaving you with such an angry mouth._

_One that's void of all discretion, such an awful tearing sound._

Dashboard Confessional - This Bitter Pill

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 17

Bitter Pill

"_Bella, I'm leaving."_

I heard the words, of course, considering I was in no way hearing impaired. They entered my ear canal, traveling on their sound waves, did whatever magical thing they did in there that actually allowed the process of hearing, and I listened to them. Apparently, however, there was a detour sign just before they reached my brain, because I sure as hell didn't understand them.

The result was five pairs of eyes watching me concernedly as I muttered beneath my breath like some kind of lunatic.

"Leaving. Leaving. You're leaving? No, you're not leaving. Who's leaving?"

They allowed me to go on like this for perhaps thirty seconds before Rose suddenly gave me a none-to-gentle shake.

"Bella!" she demanded, and I felt my eyes focus in on her beautiful face. "I am leaving here."

The words, spoken so directly, toppled any road blocks along the way and hit my brain with the precision of an arrow on a bulls-eye.

Rose was leaving.

I went limp in her grasp, all of the blood leaving my face in a single fell swoop. My breathing came in quick, desperate gasps as I tried to pull in the seemingly short supply of air.

Edward immediately stepped forward, but I waved him off, recognizing the slight panic that tightened his features. This was not a symptom of an inexplicable disease. This was the physical manifestation of a loss so great that it's nearly impossible to comprehend, let alone cope with. I just needed a moment.

Shaking free of Rose's hands, I began to pace.

I didn't need to ask why, but I was going to. How long had Emmett expected Rose to stand by and watch his antics without them driving her out? Why was he so selfish? He was the one doing this to us, he should have to leave!

I sank onto the floor, drawing my knees up to my chest and hugging them. I looked up at Rose, who was frowning as she continued to watch me.

"Why?" I whispered.

Scowling, she turned away, stomping back to the closet and tearing more of her things free of their hangers. Edward didn't attempt to stop her this time as she threw all of the fragile garments into her expensive luggage. Alice winced several times, but made no move to help or interfere.

A solid, cool presence sank onto the floor gracefully beside me, a knee nudging my hip lightly, and I glanced to find Jasper smiling gently at me. Warm waves of calm washed peacefully over me, battling the rising panic that was rather persistently rising. He reached over suddenly and took one of my hands, unwinding my arm from around my legs, and rested it between the two of his, his thumb rubbing soothing circles across my skin.

I smiled my thanks for the comforting gesture, ignoring Edward's grumbling exhalation and cross expression.

And suddenly Rose turned. I wondered how near the surface her demon must be, for the expression on her face was one of inhuman anger. I shrank back against the wall, unable to recall a time in my life when I'd seen her look so...terrifying.

Her arctic smile was less than reassuring. "Why, Bella? Really? I'd think it'd be rather obvious. Emmett doesn't want me anymore, alright? There, I've said it."

"Rose..." Esme murmured in quiet admonishment, but a low growl from Rose silenced further protestations from any of us. She looked as though she were about to snap. I hated seeing her like this. I hated Emmett for doing this to her.

"Don't 'Rose' me, Esme. Surely you've seen it. He knows I'm leaving! We discussed it last night."

My malfunctioning brain was able to pick up a recollection of a very loud crash from the night previous. I wondered absently what she'd broken.

"Yet he's not here, is he? He's not trying to stop me! It would just make things easier for him and that little tramp if I was completely out of the picture! He's probably at her house now!"

"Tramp?" I parroted in confusion, just before realization hit and a cold pit of dread settled heavily in my stomach, causing a wave of bile to scorch the back of my throat. "Oh...Lys..."

Rose was in front of me faster than I could blink. I felt her fingers covering my mouth for only a moment before there was a blur of movement that I barely recognized as a hand, pushing her away from me. She crashed into the wall on the far side of the room, pictures of she and Emmett's weddings toppling to the floor and shattering. I stared at their smiling faces, blinking back tears, unable to even conjure the will to admonish Jasper for using such brute force.

Rose brushed herself off as though nothing had happened, snapping sharply, "Do not say her name around me. Ever."

"I don't understand," I finally admitted with a rather pathetic little sniffle. They were friendly to a point of flirting, sure, but I'd never seen them so much as hug. "I mean, they're not, like..."

"What's not to understand?" she interrupted coldly. "Jesus, you can't still be that naïve, you're seventeen."

"Rose!" Edward snarled, teeth bared.

She ignored him, taking a step toward me, her expression akin to awe. "Oh my God, she is. Well, Bella" she began, using a voice that would be insulting to a two year old. Some of my sympathy toward her hardened slightly as her condescension rolled over me in almost palpable waves. "You brought your little friend around here, and she stole my husband, that's what happened. And poor, simple-minded Emmett seems to think that he's going to find something in that..._human_, that he can't find in me."

"I'm sure she didn't mean to--"

"Really?!" Her sneer held more venom than her blood. "Yes, I'm sure it was just an accident when they _fucked. _She just _tripped_ and fell onto his..."

"_Enough!_"

The single commanding word punctured the hollow ringing in my ears that had accompanied a blush so fierce that I thought I might spontaneously combust.

Emmett and Lys had…? But he was a vampire and she was a human. How… How was that even possible? Carlisle had said it was dangerous; with his strength and her humanity. And he was married! She knew that!

Oh, this was bad on so many different levels I didn't even know where to begin.

Carlisle stood in the doorway, the only one of us who appeared calm. Tired, certainly, but calm nonetheless.

"Rose, if you wish to go and stay with Tanya in Denali you have our blessing, despite our misgivings about your leaving, but you will do so in a respectful manner. Bella, please adjourn to your bedroom. Your mother and I will be along to speak with you shortly."

I escaped the stifling, awkward atmosphere as quickly as my legs would take me, not stopping until I'd slammed my bedroom door shut and leaned against it, my emotions running a gambit so swift and colorful that I felt I might be sick for the sudden changes.

The entire situation was horrifying.

I threw myself onto my bed, unsure if I wanted to laugh or cry.

Rose was really going. Though I hadn't had a chance to ask, it sounded like she was going to stay with Tanya up in Alaska. Was she going forever? Would Alice answer if I asked her that?

I sighed heavily, tucking my face into the darkness between my folded arms.

What was Emmett doing? He was giving up his eternal happily ever after; and for what? For a stupid, plain human girl, overshadowed by Rose's pinky finger alone. I hated them both. I wished I'd never met Lys, or that she'd never moved here, or even better yet, that she'd been with her parents on that fateful camping trip.

I uttered a quiet sob at the horrible thought.

Why did everything have to be so complicated? Why couldn't we go back to the way things were?! I wanted the days of dual mothers ensuring that carrots were eaten and sunscreen was applied. Days of Jasper and Alice cheating to help me win at games I had no chance at otherwise. And Emmett taunting Edward about what I'd hunt when they turned me while Rose slapped him across the back of the head.

I wondered where Emmett was now. Obviously hiding from the wrath of both Rose and the family, but where? I doubted he was really hunting, but I couldn't imagine where a vampire would go to pass the time. I envisioned him sitting alone in a dark theatre, pondering if popcorn would taste as awful as it smelled. Or in a dusty library, reading and reminiscing. Both seemed unlikely.

When the pieces fell into place several seconds later, the click was almost audible.

Lys was tired and wanted to go home.

Emmett was in desperate need of a hunt.

Those...those..._assholes_!

My family was falling apart and they were sneaking off to make out and I refused to imagine what else?!

A hazy red tinted swamped my vision, the fury stealing through me so quickly that I began to shake with the sudden adrenaline. Common sense and manners fled in the wake of a raging monster that fed on my assumptions and accusations.

I leapt from the bed with far more grace than my barely functioning mind should've been able to pull off, stalking over to the bookshelf that housed my phone.

Yanking it out of the charger, I hit the number one speed dial, vowing to wipe it clean as soon as I hung up.

The voice that answered was tentative, and I knew she'd been expecting my call. "H-Hello?"

"_You bitch!" _I spat the words with as much hatred as I could muster.

I heard a quiet breath on the other end of the line and waited for her response. I wanted this fight, wanted her to retaliate in kind. Instead came a murmured, "I guess I deserve that."

Her acceptance of my anger only enraged me further.

"Did you know she was leaving? Did you know?! Tell me right now, or I swear to God I'll let Rose come over there, and in the state she's in, it'll be even harder to identify your corpse than it was your parents'!"

There was a swift gasp, and I felt a dark surge of satisfaction that I'd managed to land such a vicious blow.

"Bella..." she whispered miserably, and I quickly cut her off, unwilling to allow her to attempt to sway me.

"Answer me!" I shouted harshly, feeling my vocal chords strain with the effort.

"Yes, I knew," she finally admitted, and the need to hurt her increased tenfold.

"I hate you."

"I know," she replied simply.

Self-pity filtered in to saturate the mindless fury and I whispered, "How could you do this to me? How could you do this to my family?"

"I love him, Bella."

"Bullshit! You don't even know him! You don't know anything about us! You're not one of us, Lysandra, and you never will be! You are _not _a Cullen! Got it?! You are nothing but a worthless, home-wrecking whore!" I laughed, a shrill sound that I didn't recognize as my own voice. "I hope he hurts you. I hope you feel even a fraction of the pain you're inflicting. I hope he flexes his fingers just a little too hard and snaps your stupid little neck!"

"That's enough, Bella."

For a moment, I thought that Carlisle had interrupted my murderous tirade, and whirled. But my door was still firmly shut.

"Isabella Marie Cullen, do you understand me?"

I stared down at the phone in my hand, the madness that had descended with my rage causing me to wonder if perhaps the receiver had come to life and was somehow admonishing me for my deplorable behavior. It took several beats of my slowing heart to realize that it was Emmett's voice; that I had been correct in assuming his location.

With shaking fingers, I held the telephone back up to my ear, whispering, "Emmett?"

"Bella," he acknowledged quietly.

Hearing his voice, the unchanging voice that I'd come to associate with my Emmett, a beacon of fun and security since I was a child...it shattered the frenzied rage that had slowly been solidifying around me, leaving only a winding downward spiral of grief.

"What are you doing?" I asked brokenly, sinking slowly to my knees. Without the bracing, superficial strength of adrenaline, I found myself crumpling.

"Bella, you've asked that I respect your need for privacy in regards to your relationships, now I'm asking that you do the same."

"But...Rose...our family..." I uttered around the lump in my throat that must surely be the size of a grapefruit.

"Trust me when I say that I have thoroughly thought this through. I know it's hard, on all of us, now, but it will get better."

Tears had begun to slowly leak from the corners of my eyes, and no matter how often I dashed them away with the backs of my hands, they refused to cease. I finally gave up, allowing them their damp paths down my cheeks.

"Why?"

"I'll be home in a bit, we'll discuss this then." I wanted to persist, but he spoke with such authority that I knew there'd be getting nothing else out of him for the moment.

"Okay," I agreed, suddenly faced, for the first time in my seventeen years, with a silence between Emmett and myself that I was unsure of how to fill. Finally, manners that had been set on the backburner fizzled to life, and I murmured, "I'll see you then."

As I reached for the button to hang up, I heard him exclaim, "Bella, wait!"

I eagerly pushed the receiver to my ear, hope cresting unwisely within me.

Tell me that this is all a terrible joke, Emmett. Tell me that you'll come home and stop Rose from leaving. Tell me that Lys is moving to Antarctica and we'll never have to see her again!

Though he meant well, his words were some of the most disappointing that I'd ever heard.

"I love you."

The wave of desperate longing morphed swiftly into a crushing, frigid tsunami of disillusionment, and as the first quiet sob tore its way out of my throat, I hung up.

* * *

I'd been expecting dramatics. Perhaps a prolonged farewell speech, or an impassioned monologue about how she'd eventually get her revenge. Maybe she'd destroy everything in their room that belonged to Emmett.

It was Rose, after all.

But she'd surprised us all with a tentative smile and a round of hugs, before she'd easily hefted her belongings into the trunk of her car and, slipping on her designer sunglasses, driven off.

And just like that.

She was gone.

The gaping hole she left in her wake was a tangible, festering thing.

By the time Emmett arrived the angry and concerned mutterings of my siblings and parents had coalesced into a single, distraught din, reminiscent of something one might hear from an angry television mob. I almost felt sorry for him.

Almost.

We made it to the dining room under Carlisle's watchful eye, but the very second that Emmett hit his chair, it began.

The questions came rapid-fire, and despite the graces granted to him by his vampire status, there was no way he could answer them as quickly as they were rattled off.

"How long have you known?" demanded Esme.

"Why?" I asked plaintively.

"What exactly are you hoping to accomplish here, Emmett?" Edward questioned.

Jasper threw in, "Hope it's worth it, Em."

Alice and Carlisle were curiously silent. Alice had probably already lived the entire conversation out in her head, and I supposed it really wasn't unusual for Carlisle to reserve judgment until all sides had been heard.

Emmett was silent for several moments, before sighing heavily as he got to his feet.

"I know, you're all upset by what's happened today, and though I disagree, you feel you deserve answers. To begin. Esme." He turned toward her with a slight smile that, for the first time I'd seen, she didn't return. Her stare hadn't even been _this_ icy when he'd stained her favorite Persian rug beyond repair.

"We reached this decision last night, though we've been talking about it for about a week now. Bella." I looked away from his gaze, knowing myself well enough to know seeing his almost child-like smile would undo all of the anger I'd worked up. "Why, you ask? Well, I have a question for you. Do you really think that I'm selfish enough to destroy what Carlisle has built if this was simply a passing whim? Resolution for some sort of boredom? You want to know why? She's my singer."

Every head in the room whipped toward him in a single blur of motion. Even Alice's.

I was a bit slower to respond. Obviously this term had vampire connotations that had nothing to do with the word's traditional meaning.

"How is she still alive?" Carlisle suddenly demanded.

Emmett shook his head slowly, shrugging. "I don't know what to tell you, Carlisle. The first time I was in close proximity I could think of nothing but draining her. Hell, I still think about it sometimes--"

"I wish you would," I spat angrily.

"Isabella Cullen!" Of anyone who might have scolded my words, the weight of Carlisle's disappointment landed the most heavily upon my shoulders. I glanced into his face timidly. His gaze was cold and reprimanding as he held my eyes. "You will never say such a thing in this house again, do you understand me?"

"But she--"

"Regardless of perceived crimes, you are not to wish that fate upon anyone. _Do you understand me?_" he interrupted in a tone that brooked absolutely no disobedience.

I glanced down at the table, examining the intricate wood grains, my cheeks flaming. "Yes, sir," I whispered.

"Emmett, continue," he offered as I blinked against humiliating tears.

"Bella, I don't hold it against you that you feel that way. I expected nothing less. I'm honestly surprised you guys are taking it _this_ well." His smile was half-hearted. "But nothing you say will change my mind on this matter. This is something that I want. That I need."

If his initial betrayal was a knife to the heart, these words simply twisted the blade painfully, over and over. There was no hope. His mind was made up.

"What about Rose?" I gasped softly.

He frowned at her name, and I made a mental note to bring it up in conversation as often as possible.

"Bella..." Edward admonished quietly, and I was sudden aware of his acute, knowing stare. I decided it'd be best to keep my plans of vengeance to myself for the time being.

"Rose will do what Rose does best," Emmett declared with a wry smile. "She'll take care of herself. I think it'll be a good thing for her to be on her own for a while."

"So what, you just dumped Rose to be with that stupid..." A glare from no fewer than three sets of eyes had me revising my initial word choice. "Girl?"

"Bella, she's not just another girl. If I was after just any old girl, don't you think I could have found one over the years? She's my singer."

"I don't know what that means!" I barked.

Emmett shot a surprised glance in Carlisle's direction. Apparently my vampiric education had been lacking.

Alice spoke for the first time since we'd been seated. "Bella," she trilled softly. "What's your favorite food?"

I rolled my eyes. I was really not in the mood for one of Alice's little games. "What does that have to do with anything?" I grumped.

"Humor me."

"I don't know. Those orange pumpkin cookies that mom makes at Halloween, the vanilla cinnamon ones." I crossed my arms with a sour scowl. This was supposed to be a 'yell at Emmett' family meeting, not a 'gang up on Bella' one.

Alice seemed pleased with my answer. "And what's the first thing you do when you get home from school and Esme's made those cookies?"

I sighed; a long, irritated sigh. "I eat them."

"What if she tells you not to?" Alice questioned, as though she didn't know.

My glance toward Esme was surreptitious and I wondered if I'd get punished for misdeeds carried out nearly a year ago. My voice was slightly less rebellious as I responded, "I find a way to get them anyway."

Alice smirked, nodding. "Exactly!"

The silence that ensued was filled with a fair bit of confusion on my part. I finally exclaimed, "Exactly what?!"

"Lysandra is Emmett's pumpkin cookie!"

I blinked slowly, staring at Alice as though she'd lost her mind.

Emmett cleared his throat, looking far more amused than I felt he had any right to.

"Okay, not the best metaphor."

Jasper was chuckling at my elbow, and my temper flared.

"You're _laughing_? You guys think this is funny?! Rose hasn't even been gone an hour and already you think it's alright to make a joke of this?! I lost my sister today! I'm _sorry_, I _fail_ to see the humor in this! Someone tell me what's going on!"

A cool hand against my neck brought my rising temperature down and I sighed as a wave of calm seemed to flow directly from Jasper's palm into me.

"Bella, a singer is essentially a vampire's favorite… food," Carlisle began, and the nonsense Alice had been spouting shifted slightly, coming into focus. "The blood of a human that is so potent to our senses we are nearly helpless to resist draining them."

I blanched, shivering softly at the thought of any of my family member's feeding on a human. Carlisle was right; I didn't _really_ wish that on anyone. Not even the girl that had been my supposed friend. The ruiner of lives.

I felt the pull of macabre fascination, in spite of myself.

"Have you ever...?" I began hesitantly, unsure of whether or not I'd be allowed to ask this question.

Alice quickly piped in, "Two for me."

Jasper was tight lipped, while Emmett nodded. "One for me as well. Well, two now I guess."

"Dad?" I asked with a frown. He'd been alive for a very long time.

"Only one," he said with a faint smile.

Edward snorted in a very un-Edward-like manner. "One that you've allowed yourself, anyway."

Carlisle tipped his head slightly in acknowledgment just as a thought occurred to me.

"Then why isn't Lys dead?" I asked, grimacing as my lips formed her name.

I wasn't the only one interested in this answer. All eyes returned to Emmett, though his initial shrug suggested we wouldn't be getting much of an answer out of him.

"I don't know," he sighed. "You guys saw, that first day, Alice had to practically drag me off her. But once that passed..."

"What do you mean passed?" Jasper asked curiously. "That shouldn't pass. If anything, it should grow stronger."

Emmett nodded helplessly. "I know! I can tell you right now that my first sure as hell isn't alive today, and she didn't smell nearly as good as this girl. But it's just... just easier, every time. I saw her a few hours later and yes, the thirst was there, but it was less, and in its place was something else. It's like, from the second I first laid eyes on her, there was this pull. Not just the blood. Something else."

"Eloquent," Edward remarked dryly, obviously just as confused as Jasper was.

"Shut up," Emmett complained. "There aren't words for it, okay? I just...Where there's me, there needs to be her. And I loved Rosalie, please, don't ever think that I didn't. But my entire life revolves around this girl now. If anything ever happened to her...I don't think I would even want to continue on."

"Carlisle?" Esme whispered tremulously as they exchanged a glance. They obviously knew more than they were letting on.

We silently, if not patiently, awaited an explanation.

"Though there's no proof on the matter, it's been suggested by some that vampires have only one true mate. While it's not impossible to find someone else and bond with them, even grow to love them, the relationship in question would pale so as to not even exist in comparison with what one might find with this mate. If this is the case, and Emmett has, in fact, found his, it stands to reason that he would want her fully, mind, body, even blood, but his love for her would not allow him to take her life, regardless of how wonderful she might smell. The downside to this type of relationship, is that, were anything to happen to her, it would nearly destroy him," Carlisle offered all of this knowledge in the strict, professional voice he used when giving patients their diagnosis. Clearing his throat slightly, he added, "Again, none of this has been proven."

"She's going to die, Emmett," Alice staunchly proclaimed, and Carlisle winced slightly at her subtlety.

"She's human," I added unnecessarily, wanting to drive the painful point home.

Edward, who'd no doubt been following the inner Emmett monologue, arched a brow, suddenly interjecting, "You can ask, but I don't think that's going to happen. Not after today."

Emmett's large hands clenched into fists. "Rose should have no bearing on this!" he insisted.

I watched the back and forth avidly, wondering what their words were in reference to.

But Emmett, being Emmett, wasn't one to tiptoe around a subject, and he suddenly turned to eye Carlisle, bracing himself, before plunging right in. "Carlisle, I want you to change her."

I didn't even dare to breathe into the silence that followed this declaration. It swelled, crackling like white noise in my ears, until Alice uttered a small squeak.

"Emmett, it's not going to happen."

He pounded his fists on the table. "Carlisle, you'd refuse me this because of Rose?! You changed me without even gaining my permission, all at her request! It's not fair!"

"Emmett, easy," Carlisle interjected, shaking his head. "I wasn't going to deny you. I do wish to speak to the girl, of course, before any rash decisions are made. She's young, you have plenty of time."

Emmett relaxed, falling into his chair with a sigh.

I felt as though the universe had grabbed me by the ankles, shook me down for lunch money, and then dunked my head in the toilet. What kind of sick joke was this?! He wanted to change her?! I'd have to spend eternity with her?! No! _No!_

Leaping to my feet, my chair clattering to the floor behind me, I slammed my hands palm down on the table, the effect far less intimidating than the thunderous crack that had followed Emmett's similar gesture.

"You are not to change her," I whispered threateningly.

"I'm afraid I agree with Bella on this, I don't think it's a wise idea," Edward agreed.

"Big surprise," Jasper scoffed. "Score a few points with Bella, and get rid of the girl you're so suspicious of, even though you have no proof of any wrong doing."

My gaze was betrayed as it shot to Jasper, who simply shrugged that calm, unaffected shrug of his.

"I'm sorry, Bella, but I don't think this is our decision to make. Just as I felt, and still do, that Rosalie and Edward's personal opinions on the matter should not have any affect your decision to be changed."

Carlisle nodded slowly. "I understand that everyone is upset, and that this affects us all. But Jasper's correct. This is not something that will be up for a vote. If and when the time comes, it will be a decision made by Esme, Emmett, Lysandra and myself."

"I can't believe we're even talking about this!" Disbelief was fading back into anger at a dizzying pace. Vampire soul mates? Changing that stupid girl that wrecked everything?! "Emmett did something wrong! I don't care if she's his angel or his soul mate or his singing angel soul mate! He made promises to Rose! Promises that he broke! And now she's gone. How are we forgetting this? We've forgiven him so quickly that it's okay to even bring up the idea of turning that awful girl into one of you and letting her join our family?! No! We're not discussing this! This is not happening! Emmett!" I thrust a trembling finger at him. "I hate you for what you've done. I hope you're happy with your stupid human girlfriend! I hope you don't accidentally crush her bones into dust the next time you're breaking the vows you made to Rose!"

"Bella, please," Esme pleaded, standing slowly. I hastily backed away from her outstretched hand, tripping over the chair I'd upset and crashing to the floor with a grimace. I shot to my feet, rubbing my backside, slowly easing toward the door.

"No! I'm not doing this anymore! I'm not going to pretend to be happy for Emmett. I don't care if he didn't have a choice about Rose! I don't care if she was the worst wife ever! You just don't..._cheat_ on her!"

Emmett looked appalled by my entire lengthy speech. "Cheated? How do you..."

"Oh, Rose told us _all _about it, Emmett!" I laughed, pausing as I found the door.

"Bella, you need to calm down, we don't want you growing ill," Carlisle murmured, glancing at Jasper beseechingly.

"Calm down?!" I cried, my voice rising by several octaves. "I won't! Maybe the lot of you aren't riled enough, did you think of that?! If this is how things work around here, you can just forget it! I don't want to spend forever with _any of you!_"

I turned and fled, nearly blinded by the tears that streamed mercilessly from my eyes.

It was a lie.

And we all knew it.

I only hoped that when I'd regained my composure, and came hiccupping into the kitchen for hugs and comfort food, no one would call me on it.

* * *

**A/N: Awww, poor Bella. What an awful day. I'm sure one of our vampire boys will be more than happy to make it up to her.**

**Emmett and Lys are taking a back seat now that a fairly significant point of that subplot has come to pass. And obviously, Bella won't be quite so eager to hang out with her. ;P She can spend some more enjoyable quality time with Edward and Jasper.**

**Please let me know what you thought!**


	23. Leaping Hurdles

**A/N: Okay, so please don't kill me. I know it's been ages since I updated! I wish I had a good excuse. Work or real life or something, but in reality, I've just been uninspired. I'm hoping that with the posting of this chapter, that'll be gone, but we'll have to see.**

**Thanks to everyone that's offered me encouragement and reviews!**

**This chapter felt rather bleh to me, but I've been assured it's okay. Please let me know!**

**Also, I've been nominated for an award in the "Everything's Bigger in Texas Jasper/Bella fanfiction Contest"! Wow! My one shot "To Dream" has been nominated in the best lemon one shot category, so if you're feeling up to it, feel free to toss me a vote! It appears you can vote by PM'ing anyone on the C2 or you can visit http://www(dot)jaspers_darlins(dot)livejournal(dot)com/**

**Thanks whoever nominated me!**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 18

Leaping Hurdles

Jasper PoV

It'd been a week.

A week to the day since Emmett confessed his 'sins', be they real or imagined, and Rosalie had fled the love and safety of a home she'd known for nearly seventy years, leaving a path of emotional carnage in her wake.

Now, I wasn't prone to histrionics, as I'd noticed the women of this family (and Edward) were, but I really couldn't fault her for wanting to leave. She'd be back, of course, I had no doubt about that, but wading through the wreckage of her broken marriage, nearly drowning in the tidal wave that was Emmett's newfound love, well...that really wasn't Rosalie's style.

I wasn't sure where to stand on the whole subject.

After a hundred and fifty years I'd come to realize that perfection was nothing more than an illusion. There was no such thing as a perfect person, object or relationship. Not even love, an emotion expected to withstand every possible disaster known to mankind, could claim perfection. Everyone and everything had flaws. You were better off accepting this right from the start, rather than turning a face of betrayal to the fates when the inevitable realization later hit.

Emmett was certainly no exception to this rule. He had his faults, as we all did, and I just couldn't seem to summon the appropriate level of anger for his indiscretions, as was expected of me.

Add to this the fact that I'd seen vampires, newborn and ancients alike, at some of their worst. I knew what Emmett was truly capable of, should the whim strike him, and frankly, infidelity and mating with a human were fairly mild crimes on that list.

Did I think that Emmett could have handled the situation with a bit more grace?

Hell yes.

It was just common sense not to invite your girlfriend into a bed still occupied by your wife.

In this case, less for fear of _her_ wrath, than that of her sister.

Though Bella had finally emerged later that night, sullen, but with her tail firmly tucked between her legs, she'd yet to speak a single word to Emmett since the incident. If only I could say the same for her situation with the human girl.

Personally, the girl was nothing to me. If Emmett wanted to kill her or change her or keep her human, well that was his prerogative, and I wasn't going to interfere. But if you asked me what I thought of her, I'd probably shrug and utter something entirely non-committal, something along the lines of, "Meh". I could live with her, I could live without her. She'd seemed to be a good friend for Bella, but since that was a thing of the past, I really couldn't be bothered to think about her when there were other pressing matters to attend to.

Bella, on the other hand, was barely able to control herself if they were within range of sight of one another. And the same room? Forget it; calming Bella was truly a lost cause.

The first several days consisted of a murderous rage so acute that I was forced to hunt each morning before school, lest the overflow of her emotion send me on a killing spree, which I assure you, would be no good for our cover. These were the days when I was most thankful that there was at least one of us in each of Bella's classes, as Edward had advised me he'd seen some rather violent plots in Bella's mind. Would Bella actually jump on the little mortal's back and beat her senseless with a geometry text book? I'd hazard a guess not, but it was probably best not to provide her the opportunity.

The remainder of the week consisted of snide comments and small jabs, hissed insults and very un-Bella-like remarks. If Lys and Emmett sought to join our lunch table, Bella would quite pointedly stand and find another, as far away as possible. Edward and I decided to join her, of course, though Alice waffled between the two tables often enough to earn the cold shoulder and a bit of silent treatment herself. These were afternoons of frigid derision and what could only be described as a feeling of moral superiority to the couple. It was hard to believe that she'd ever felt love the two of them.

This week held promise, however. Bella seemed to have come to the conclusion that ignorance was bliss, and, for her at least, the two had simply ceased to exist. She'd even smiled for me today.

I couldn't help but wonder if Edward had made her smile yet.

Had he set her down on the piano bench and played something that made her sigh wistfully and smile languorously? Had he gently prodded her through her geometry homework, amusing her with tales of his past schooling? Maybe he'd taken her to the museum...

My fists clenched tightly, snapping the neck of the small deer I held without my permission. The animal uttered a tiny, shaking breath and was still.

I tossed it away with a groan, sinking down against the nearest tree and resting my head in my hands.

Did they really think that I was that ignorant? That after a hundred years I didn't recognize the almost palpable tension of that very specific type of unrelieved stress?

I'd known the instant they'd burst through the front door. It buzzed between them like a swarm of angry bees. Bella's edgy, restless demeanor... Edward's nearly black gaze and clipped words... The way his scent was all over her...

Growling softly, I pushed to my feet with enough force to make the sapling at my back creak in admonishment. I paced, stirring the dying foliage with my swift, quiet steps.

Why did it matter?

The silent question had been one I'd been asking myself for days now, as the little green eyed monster within grew to a beast that was nearly insatiable and almost impossible to control. Where had this sudden jealousy come from? If the two of them were happy, who was I to begrudge them that?

When I'd initially told Edward that I planned to 'ask Bella out', I'd been antagonizing him, as I found myself wont to do (he made himself such an easy target), but the idea had held absolutely no sincerity.

Now...Well, now it had merit, dammit.

Not as a tool to further provoke my sullen brother, but because...because...

Shit. Because I _liked_ Bella.

I cringed to hear the voice in my head over-enunciate the word in a fair imitation of an enamored adolescent girl. Unfortunately it was something I was going to have to get used to, because, like most love-sick females, mortal and immortal alike, the inner monologue didn't know when to shut up.

_So, you like her_, it whispered in benevolent acceptance. _There's nothing wrong with that. She's smart, funny, attractive... You enjoy spending time with her, something that can't even be said for all of your vampire family members. She understands and accepts your true nature..._

"She's practically my sister," I protested aloud, knowing the argument was half-hearted even as the words left my lips. I couldn't recall my mortal family; whether or not I'd had siblings, but I knew, on some instinctive level, that what I'd felt when I'd kissed Bella was not something I'd have felt toward someone I truly considered kin. After all, I only pretended to be Rosalie's twin on occasion and the very idea of kissing _her_ brought remnants of human nausea right to the fore of my mind.

I could, however, recall the lovers I'd acquired since the change. And though I was wary to identify them as such, my emotions: jealousy, possessiveness, a general feeling of well-being, well... They were certainly more along the lines of the latter.

More like Edward than I'd care to admit, I was quick to find another argument that would deny me potential happiness.

"Edward told me how he feels about her long before these feelings developed..." I murmured, well aware that I was hosting a debate with myself, and feeling rather foolish for it.

"Regardless of our recent disputes, he is one of the closest things to kin I've ever known, and he would certainly feel betrayed if I made any advances. I can't do that to him..." Could I? We'd been close once, and I'd hate to think that I'd ruined any chance at reconciliation by acting on what could possibly be a passing infatuation.

_Pursuing Bella is in no way betraying Edward's loyalty!_ The voice fervently argued. _You're saving him heartache in the end. The two of them are completely incompatible. His overbearing demeanor alone is enough to put her off of him._

I nodded slowly as the argument built steam.

_How many times has he wronged her and you for that matter, since he made his proclamation? Edward always has his own best interests at heart. Is that truly what Bella needs? What she deserves?_

Sighing, I rubbed my temples.

_He doesn't know her, not really, and he makes no attempt to. Look at that ridiculous apology gift he got her._

"Which she uses," I interjected.

_Thanks to you._

I silently replayed the past several weeks in my mind, closely monitoring the relationship that seemed to have sprouted from a volatile mix of fear, anger and trust.

_He nearly bit her,_ the voice maliciously interrupted, and I felt a curious coil of fear winding tightly in my stomach in remembrance.

"She'll be changed soon and it won't matter..." I whispered skeptically, trying and failing miserably to halt the sudden barrage of images that came torturously to mind. Each and every one involved Edward losing control of his physical capabilities and injuring Bella in some way. We were all guilty of it. From hugging her too hard, to forgetting her mortal shortcomings. But never with violent intent. Until Edward...

Snarling softly as rage that I hadn't even realized I was holding at bay washed forward, I grasped a small boulder and hurled it at the nearest tree; the two meeting with a satisfying crash as the tree teetered precariously, before toppling, the earth shivering on impact.

I'd been the first to forgive that incident.

Because I'd had to.

Because when it came to sticking to our 'special diet', I was a constant source of worry for the Cullens.

Because I'd come to them with eyes colored crimson.

Because I was probably the last person to judge such occurrences.

But I realized that my acceptance had been premature; that I hadn't truly understood what he'd almost done, and what the consequences would have been, until right this moment. This wasn't the anonymous siren call of a stranger's blood.

It was Bella.

Edward had nearly killed our Bella.

_My_ Bella.

A dark, humanity-crushing fury roared through me as I allowed myself the possessive label, demanding vengeance for a crime that hadn't even been committed.

It was only several moments later, as I strode, snarling, back toward the house, that I realized I'd allowed myself to become completely derailed.

Not only had the weight of Edward's guilt been sufficient punishment for his misdeed, but I'd allowed myself to become so focused on he and Bella's relationship, that I'd lost sight of the true problem at hand.

And unfortunately, it had nothing to do with Edward. Regardless of what he'd told me.

I continued toward the house (albeit much more calmly), resolutely making up my mind in a single moment of clarity.

I wanted Bella. Selfishly, wholly and despite the fact that it might hurt Edward.

I wanted her.

And I intended to have her.

* * *

"Well, I don't have much to report on the Quileute front," Edward declared later that evening, as he, Emmett, Alice and myself gathered to have our first Nancy Drew meeting. Alice, Emmett and I jockeyed for position on my bed, while Edward sat in an armchair, looking mildly annoyed with our antics. "They appear to be respecting the treaty in so far as they've not told anyone about us. As long as we don't hunt humans and refrain from setting foot on their land, they don't seem to care much that we've returned."

Alice nodded sagely as we finally settled in. "I could've told you that much."

I barely refrained from casting a cynical glance in her direction. We all knew that she had quite a bit of difficulty 'seeing' many of the Quileutes and their actions, regardless of the fact that she'd like to believe her gift was omnipotent.

"What about Bella's illness?" Emmett demanded, true to character as he tactfully drove right to the heart of the matter.

Edward shook his head slowly. "I managed to speak with someone, a young man named Sam who seemed to have a fairly good grasp of the treaty. They hadn't even realized that we had a human living with us. It was no easy matter to assure him that she wasn't in danger, but we came to an understanding. I don't believe they have any involvement with our mystery."

None of us, save for Alice, had believed that they had. I had a feeling that her suspicion was closely linked to the fact that she could see neither Bella's illness, nor the actions of our natural nemeses. Not surprisingly, it appeared her doubts were unfounded.

"However, I thought you might like to know..." Edward leaned forward, pausing briefly, whether to be sure that Esme and Carlisle were truly gone (we'd gifted them with a weekend away for their zillionth anniversary) or simply for dramatic effect, I wasn't sure, before murmuring quite suddenly, "They've begun shifting again."

Our curious silence was obviously less than the reaction he'd been expecting if his glower was anything to go by.

"Hello? They've begun shifting again?" he repeated, impatience coloring his tone.

Alice and Emmett's confusion mingled with my own, though she at least was attempting to summon enthusiasm regarding his declaration.

"Um...that's..." she began.

"Wait, they're what now?" Emmett blurted, shaking his head.

Edward sighed heavily, an art he'd perfected, before seeming to realize that this was a perfect opportunity to opine at length.

"The first time we resided in this area, the Quiluete had the ability to shift into wolves," he began, his voice very Carlisle-esque. Despite the ensuing lecture, I found myself interested in this bit of information. I'd been informed of the treaty, but the lore surrounding it was less than clear. "When we departed, so did this ability. It appears that with our return, they've rediscovered their ancestral heritage."

Alice pursed her lips. "We'll need to be careful on our hunts. It'd probably be best to just avoid this area for a while. Especially since I have such a hard time seeing them."

I nodded my agreement, though Edward scoffed. "Trust me, there's no mistaking them for normal animals. The smell alone..." He shook his head, assuming a disgusted expression.

Emmett chuckled. "Alright, so that's a pretty firm 'no' on the Quileutes, though we should probably keep an eye on them from now on."

Alice took this as her cue, popping up from the bed in a fluid, energetic motion.

"Well, as you know, I've been researching Bella's birth parents," she began. Judging by her excited tone, I half expected her to pull out a stack of tag-board charts tracking her progress. Regardless of the information she presented, I felt I was still going to have quite an advantage, considering what I'd found out. "I've managed to track them down, based on Bella's birth records. I thought they might be useful in the future as well, if she ever decided to seek them out. I mean, I don't think that she will, cause she wants us to change her and all, but you know, if she does before then..."

"Alice," I interjected, arching a brow.

She simply grinned. "Sorry. So anyway, it turns out that they both live here. I mean, like, _here_. In Forks! Renee and Charlie Swan. He's the Chief of Police, and she just kinda floats from job to job from what I could tell. They were separated at the time of Bella's birth, and I guess Renee made the decision to give Bella up."

I couldn't help but ponder this. I'd heard from many that the maternal instinct was one of the strongest in mortal women. What had gone on in this woman's head that she carried the child to term, only to relinquish parental rights once it'd been born?

"To be honest, I don't think that Charlie even knows the child existed."

"What makes you say that?" Emmett murmured.

Alice shrugged her tiny shoulders, shaking her head. "Neither of them have ever sought her. There have been no inquiries at the hospital, no scouring of the public records. It's as though she doesn't even exist to them. And while I can see that from the mother, I mean, she gave Bella up after all, he just doesn't seem the type."

Edward suddenly scowled. "You didn't happen to visit them, Alice?"

She had the good grace to look mildly bashful. "Well... I may have stopped by selling magazine subscriptions?"

The three of us sighed in unison, though her meddling tactics were really nothing new.

"Which reminds me! I need to sign Charlie Swan up for a subscription to Fisherman Quarterly online!"

I couldn't help but laugh.

"So, as far as I can tell, aside from the mother being flighty in the extreme, I mean, she makes _me_ look grounded, they're normal. Nothing paranormal. No medical history that would cause worry. I mean, they're just like, average." She lifted a single shoulder in mild disappointment, and I decided that I'd definitely won on the 'dig stuff up' front.

All eyes swung toward me as I sprung up, unable to hide the smirk that crossed my lips. Not that my news was exactly good; but I'd managed to find something that might actually be useful.

I paused, looking between the three of them, knowing that this was bound to bring up some hard feelings between Edward and Emmett.

"Well, Alice, you asked me to look at the background of Emmett's little girlfriend. And I have to tell you, it's pretty colorful."

"I knew it!" Edward declared triumphantly, causing Emmett to send him a look that would've killed had it been able.

"Hold on," I cautioned. "It's probably not what you're inevitably concluding Edward. She appears to be a good student, her criminal and school records are clean. However... Her psychological background... Well... The professionals seem to think she's nuts."

Edward snickered and Emmett sent him flying across the room with a well-placed swat.

Alice seemed less than inclined to laugh on the subject matter. Rather, she looked disturbed, a frown creasing the smooth expanse of skin between her brows. I hastened to remove the look from her face.

"Her grandmother, knowing the truth about her abilities, of course, doesn't allow them to lock her away as they'd like to. She refuses medication as well. Other than what she can 'see', there's nothing really wrong with her. They've labeled her delusional, possibly schizophrenic."

Edward regained his seat as though Emmett hadn't just sent him sprawling.

"So basically we're back where we started? No leads?"

I shifted uncomfortably.

"Not quite. I'm not sure how useful this information is going to be, but... You know that her parents were killed a few years ago?"

They all nodded. Emmett was frowning, obviously not anticipating my words, Alice as well seemed disturbed by my revelations, while Edward was on the edge of his seat, looking for any reason to call the girl out.

"I did a bit of digging regarding their deaths. I mean, I went so far as to view the coroner and police photos, and..." I shook my head helplessly. "Her parents weren't killed by bears or wolves."

Edward's eyes were the first to widen as he plucked the information prematurely from my head. I watched him impassively as I made my declaration.

"They were killed by vampires."

Everything from there was a blur of motion. Edward leapt to his feet with a low growl, the sudden suspicious anger that poured off of him nearly overwhelming. At the same moment the door flew open with a resounding crash to reveal Bella, pale and trembling, shaking her head mutely. Emmett moved to restrain the furious Edward, beseeching Alice for help.

"I knew it!" he snarled. "You want motive? There it is! We took two of hers, she's taking two of ours."

"Stop it, Edward," Emmett demanded, giving him a hard shake. "Listen to yourself. What could she possibly do? She's little more than a mortal girl!"

Ignoring the bitter resentment that washed over me from their direction, I moved to the door, taking Bella gently by the shoulders.

"Are you alright? How much did you hear?" I questioned softly, my eyes moving over her drawn features.

She blinked, pulling her gaze from Emmett and Edward and focusing on my face. She continued to shake her head, her throat working as though she wanted to speak but couldn't find the words.

"She's destroying our family, Emmett. Are you so blinded by your ridiculous lust that you'll allow her to lie to you and harm Bella?!"

Edward's words caused a ripple of silence; Bella's heart beat once, twice... A loud crash resounded behind us and I whirled, pushing her behind me as I went. Emmett had grasped Edward around the neck and had thrown him to the floor. He pinned him there, his face very close to our outraged brother's.

"Are you so fucking blinded by your love for Bella that you'd place the blame for something so terrible on an innocent girl?" Emmett spat down at him, and we all froze. I glanced at Alice, whose tiny smirk spoke volumes on her knowledge of these events.

Edward had ceased his thrashing struggles and was staring up at Emmett with shock. "You...You know?"

"Are you fucking kidding me, Edward? I'm the only one around here, aside from Esme and Carlisle, who's been in a relationship that lasted more than a year. Do you really think I couldn't see that shit?" He slowly released his grasp on Edward's throat. Neither of them moved for several seconds.

"Regardless, Emmett. You have to admit, this is worth investigating."

"I won't admit to that, Edward. You've been in her mind. I spend every waking moment with her. Do you really think that neither of us would notice if she was practicing some crazy voodoo on Bella?"

"I want to talk to her," Edward murmured.

"Absolutely not." Emmett rose, crossing his arms.

I felt Bella's warmth as she lightly pressed against my back, peering around my shoulder with avid curiosity.

"Vampires killed her parents; don't you think that she might feel the need for retribution?"

"She doesn't know that it was vampires, Edward. And I rather she not find out."

"Scared that she'll change her mind about you?"

Emmett turned, a furious glint in his topaz eyes. "She won't."

"Then why the adamant objection?"

Emmett sighed in defeat, perhaps knowing, as all of us did that if he didn't relent, Edward would simply take matters into his own hands. "Alright, Edward. I'll arrange for the three of us to 'talk'. If you hurt her, bully her...If you so much as look at her wrong, you'll wish you'd never been reborn. Got it?" Emmett growled softly.

Edward stared at the normally gentle giant with disbelief.

"What's she done to you, Em?"

I gently pushed Bella out of the way as he angrily stalked toward the door. He paused, turning back to glare at Edward. "I think you should be asking yourself the same thing."

And he left.

I stared after him for a moment, before stepping forward to offer Edward my hand.

He stared at the appendage briefly, before allowing me to help him to his feet.

"It's her," Edward whispered.

I offered him nothing more than a skeptical glance. I had my doubts on his faulty theory.

"I don't think so, Edward. What I see of her... It's not related to Bella," Alice offered.

"You can't see Bella's illness, Alice!" Edward snapped.

"Thank you for reminding me," she responded frostily. "But you're wrong. I can _see_ her, if not Bella's fever. You're making a mistake."

Edward scoffed and Alice filed stiffly out of the room, her little pixie nose in the air.

"Bella?" Edward asked suddenly. "What do you think?"

Easing out from behind me, she blinked, as though waking from a dream.

"I don't... I don't know, Edward."

"Why did she single you out to befriend Bella? Why did your illness begin around the time she moved to town?"

Bella's confusion was rising exponentially with every word that escaped Edward's lips.

"She drove Rose away. She's taken Emmett from us."

Frowning slightly, Bella tipped her head to one side, brows drawn together.

"I don't think so, Edward. Rose chose to leave. Emmett chose to break his vows. I'm angry, no furious, with her, for the role she's played, but... What you're suggesting... I don't think she has it in her."

"But she..." he began.

Bella held up her hand. "No, Edward."

His gaze was baleful as he retreated from the fight that he had no hope of winning.

The door snapped close with a quiet click, marking his departure.

My gaze slid to Bella.

"Alright?" I murmured.

She appeared to be shaking slightly as she sank into the armchair that had been occupied by Edward for most of the night.

"I can't believe it," she whispered.

I nodded, easing onto the bed.

"I know. It's pretty crazy."

She pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them.

"What's wrong with me, Jasper?" she asked quietly.

I'd never wished for an answer more than at that moment. I could do nothing but watch her with an ache of disappointment as I murmured in response. "I don't know, darlin'." I forced a smile. "But at least it doesn't seem that you're turning into a werewolf, which was Emmett's initial response."

She laughed wryly. "Gee, what a relief."

We were silent for several minutes before she uttered a tiny sigh and asked,

"Jasper?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you think I'm someone's singer?"

The question was so out of the blue that I actually found myself mentally scrambling to catch up. In my confusion, I managed nothing more than an eloquent, "What?"

She giggled, sliding off the chair and flopping onto the bed next to me.

"You heard me. Do you think that I'm someone's singer? I mean... It seems so romantic, to have someone in love with you so wholly."

I stared at her, certain my eyes were about to pop out of my head.

"Bella, a singer is _not _a good thing!"

She turned onto her side, appearing perplexed.

"But Lys is Emmett's singer, and he's like, head over heels."

"That is something...different," I replied with a frown. Obviously Bella was confused by the notion. "I can understand your confusion, singer is such a ridiculously frivolous, romantic term. I think a better one might be, 'temptation from Hell', or 'A vampire's favorite food." Bella grinned, shaking her head.

"So, being someone's singer has nothing to do with love?"

"Nothing at all. A singer is simply a person whose blood is particularly appealing to a specific vampire. They're nearly impossible to resist and almost always die to the vampire in question."

"Why didn't Emmett kill her?" she breathed, and I couldn't help but notice the warmth of her words and the sweet scent of her skin. I lay down beside her, tracing her face with my eyes.

"I don't know," I replied honestly. "There's something between them that can't be explained."

"The soulmate stuff that Carlisle was talking about?"

I frowned. "I don't think so."

"Do you think she did something to him? To make him fall in love with her?"

"No. I think that they're experiencing something that currently has no definition. I think they're legitimately in love."

Bella sighed wistfully. "Do you think that I could ever have that with someone?"

The answer came so swiftly as to be suspicious, but Bella didn't seem to notice. "Yes. I think you will." I silently added that I hoped it would be with me.

"What do you make of Carlisle's 'one true mate' theory?"

I glanced up at the ceiling. "I don't believe it. I don't believe that any two people are so attached that their death would mean the end of the other. All wounds heal with time."

Bella uttered a quiet laugh. "That's not very romantic."

"No, I suppose it's not. But it's realistic. I don't think Emmett deserves an excuse, an easy way out, and that theory would provide him with exactly that. Emmett made his decisions. Perhaps it was due to love, perhaps he simply saw greener pastures. The blame lies with him."

She smiled, and I marveled at the beauty behind that expression.

"Thanks, Jasper," she murmured, suddenly leaning forward to press a kiss to my forehead.

As she moved to pull away I lightly grasped her wrist, pulling her back so that she fell against my chest.

Her cheeks colored, a gentle rosy hue and I smiled.

"Bella?" I murmured, my breath fanning coolly over her warm lips.

"Yes?" she questioned, leaning in just a bit.

Unable to help myself, I kissed her gently, a brief, chaste touch that did little to cool my ardor, and everything to fuel it.

"Would you like to go out with me? Tomorrow night?"

She pulled back slightly, confusion, followed swiftly by giddy excitement racing through her.

"You mean like, a date?"

I nodded, hoping I was going about this correctly.

She faltered just long enough to make me begin to worry.

"Are you going to tell Edward?"

I scowled, letting my head fall back.

"I'm sorry!" she replied, instantly contrite. "I just...I mean, you know how it is, and I don't want to be dishonest with you guys. I don't want things to end up terribly like it did for Emmett!"

I couldn't fault her for that. "Though I'm sure he's already heard our conversation, yes, I'll inform Edward of our plans," I answered, knowing he and I needed to speak anyhow.

"Alright, then." Her enthusiasm returned, full force as she kissed me hard, just once, and leapt from the bed. "Tomorrow night."

"Seven o'clock." I finalized.

She nodded, running to the door and nearly crashing into it as she skidded to a halt. Throwing it wide, she yelled, "Alice! I need you!" before flying out and slamming the door closed behind her.

Sighing, feeling more happy than I had in quite some time, I fell back onto the bed, arms crossed beneath my head.

I had a date with Bella.

Edward was sure to respond with a scheme in kind, but I wasn't worried.

May the best vampire win.

* * *

**A/N: *sigh* I love Jasper. I wish he was mass-producible! ;P**

**I always love to hear what you guys think.**


	24. A Vampire's Kiss Or Gangrene?

**A/N: Hey guys! I know, I know, LTNS! Please don't kill me! I know it's been ages, and I'm deeply apologetic! I just…haven't had any inspiration whatsoever. Blame my muses or my schedule, or what have you, but every time I sat down to write, I was so apathetic.**

**But! I've since snapped out of that nonsense, and I bring to you my 12,401 word chapter in hopes that you guys can forgive me for taking so long! I can't promise that it'll 'never' be that long again, but I will definitely try to bring you more regular updates.**

**I also wanted to give a very heartfelt thanks to those of you that have pm'ed with encouragement and threats and offers for help. Those were very nice to get, and it's great to have such fantastic readers.**

**Anyhow, without further ado, here it is! Feel free to hit the review button, but if you're cranky with me about not updating, feel free not to as means of punishment!**

**~x**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 19

A Vampire's Kiss… Or Gangrene?

'_When the Count saw my face, his eyes blazed with a sort of demonaic fury, and he suddenly made a grab at my throat. I drew away, and his hand touched the string of beads which held the crucifix. It made an instant change in him, for the fury passed so quickly that I could hardly believe that it was ever there._'

"What do you mean, '_no'_?"

The fictional words of Jonathan Harker's journal blurred slightly as the already shallow pool of my patience drained to a dangerously low level; at the rate it'd been sieving away, we were fast approaching a drought. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath, drawing on what meager reserves remained. Unfortunately, it wasn't nearly enough to stop the acerbic response, which had perched readily on the tip of my tongue, from taking the short leap to my lips.

"Oh, I'm sorry, wasn't that clear?" I shook my head and smiled at him; a saccharine, falsely self-deprecating abomination of an expression. "Allow me to explain. See, you asked if I would decline Jasper's invitation for this evening and I advised no. No, I will not decline. Now, unless you're playing dumb, a trait that really isn't attractive on you, I might add, I think that you understand the meaning of that word." As an afterthought, I uttered a swift parting shot beneath my breath. "Of course, considering how often you use your _incredibly burdensome_ vampire powers to get your way, perhaps not."

A small muscle in his jaw ticked repeatedly as I delivered the insulting words in a tone that would have best served to inform a rebellious two year old of just _why_, precisely, it was important to follow the rules. His lips were pressed into a tight line, and I wondered what manner of condescension he was holding back; while his eyes, deep ochre today, peered down at me with more than just the expected anger and jealousy. A coil of something I refused to recognize as shame slithered into my stomach, knotting and churning there as I took reluctant note of the slight hurt in his gaze.

I quickly looked away with a frown.

I hadn't been myself lately. Though my family and the few friend-like acquaintances I'd managed to gain were too polite to say anything, it was painfully obvious. Even to me, and I prided myself on willful ignorance of my occasional behavioral anomalies.

My temper had been on a hair trigger; the slightest provocation was enough to make me want to put my fist through a wall, if I were even strong enough to do so, or break down into furious tears. I'd yet to decide which would be worse. And patience had become such a foreign notion to me recently that I could hardly believe I'd ever taken the playful banter of my siblings with a serene smile and a witty comeback. These days I was more likely to hurl something expensive at them and go cry to Esme. I was frustrated with the lack of progress made on my prognosis, and guilt always managed to find the most inopportune times to gnaw furiously at my insides; many of the thoughtless words I'd said in anger coming back to haunt me. I missed Emmett. I missed Rose...

I just felt... Out of control. As though the pieces of my admittedly unorthodox life had been ripped from my grasp and scattered about in a dark room, while I was left to stumble around blindly, trying to not only find them, but put them back together. Things had fallen apart so quickly... The realization that everything important to me, from my family to my health, could be taken without so much as a please or thank you was a terrifying one.

In my mind, it was just one of many on the nearly infinite list of reasons they should turn me. Maybe when I wasn't so weak, and prone to illness, and just... human, I'd have a more firm grip on things. I'd have a say over whether or not my entire life was allowed to turn to complete and utter crap over the course of little more than a few weeks.

A quiet, somehow elegant, snort from Edward drew me from my thoughts.

"Human or immortal, life doesn't yield to the demands of many, Bella."

My neck creaked in protest as I glanced up swiftly; the words so Carlisle-esque I felt the need to verify that the handsome man standing before me wasn't perfectly coiffed and honey blonde. A faint smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I took in the mop of tousled auburn locks. Did Edward realize how much he sounded like the man he'd subconsciously decided he could never live up to? Still, even Carlisle would likely acknowledge that the unnatural state of being the Cullens currently resided in, whatever state that might be, came with a few perks. I sighed, retorting with disbelief thick in my tone, "Doesn't it? Tell me, Edward, when's the last time you were ill? Humiliated yourself before your peers? Feared for your life?"

He frowned, shaking his head as he came to sit beside me on the pristinely painted white steps that led up to the house.

"It's true; many of our kind like to think that they've attained some sort of mastery over mortality and its limitations. But at what cost?"

I sighed wearily. I wasn't particularly in the mood to hear part seventy-three of Edward's hundred volume set of 'The Sacrifices of Vampires' lectures.

His laughter was quiet and melodic and warmth that had little to do with the dying rays of the setting sun, and more with the sudden awareness of Edward's nearness, tingled through my limbs. "Hear me out, love."

There was a moment of silence in which the endearment hung awkwardly between us, before I quickly nodded my assent.

"Alright, tell me all about the suffering of the vampires," I replied without the bite I'd intended the sarcastic remark to have.

He nudged me lightly with his knee in reprimand, readily reciting whatever self-pitying speech he'd prepared to buy my sympathy. Unfortunately for Edward, I was fresh out. "As you know, I cannot grow ill, or age and it's incredibly difficult for me to die. And yes, I do hold some power of persuasion over humans. Dazzling, was it?" He turned a crooked smile on me that had me sincerely doubting the accuracy of the assessment of his power. 'Some' really was an understatement. 'A whole lot' seemed good. Oh! Or infinite... Even better. Empathy may have been out of stock, but unchecked hormones certainly abounded. I forced my gaze away as he continued speaking. "But none of that has done me any good, has it, when I watch the human I care for succumbing to some unknown infirmity. In this, my eighty years of education has failed me. Even Carlisle's three hundred fifty years of knowledge hasn't been enough. There's absolutely nothing I can do. There's no one to bribe, or barter with, or threaten. I can't..." The words broke as his eyes swept swiftly over me. He summarily looked away and cleared his throat. "I couldn't stop Rose from leaving. Granted, I wasn't particularly stung by her choice to go, but I knew that it would hurt you." The smile that graced his perfect lips was wistful. "I'm unable to stop you from caring for Jasper. I can't prevent Emmett from making the many mistakes he seems so intent to follow through on. And for all of the physical prowess you seem to think we have, there's nearly as many attributes which are beyond our control. The bitter venom that fills our mouths when we're near blood. The ever-changing color of our eyes. The nearly animal state we enter when we kill." His broad shoulders rose and fell gracefully. "It's a simple, unfortunate fact of existence. Many things are beyond our power. And forever will be."

I sighed softly, digesting his words. He was right... To a degree. But I wasn't asking for all that much. Not really. I wasn't asking that the world stop spinning, or that the sun rise in the west and set in the east. I didn't need to have a chokehold on every little aspect of life, but a shred of control, just a scrap, would have been nice. And despite his soliloquy, Edward hadn't convinced me in the slightest that he didn't have at least a smidge more power over his destiny than the average human did.

Nodding slowly, I chose my words carefully. "I understand what you're saying. And, of course, I can't deny that there are some things that can never be bent to the will of any one being. There _are_ things that we will never be able to exert our control over. But to say that you have as little power as anyone else..." The corners of my lips twitched. "Well, that's a rather bold lie. You have been granted abilities that the average human hasn't."

He made to interrupt and I swiftly clapped a hand over his mouth; his expression of surprise fading quickly to amusement. "I'm not done," I chastised with a grin. He nodded slowly, his gaze meeting mine with unnerving confidence as he pressed a chaste kiss to my palm that left my skin tingling faintly and had me jerking my hand away quickly. My cheeks felt warm and I struggled briefly to recall what we'd been discussing. "Um...as I was saying..."

Edward leaned back on his hands, a lazy, masculine grin letting me know that he knew precisely the havoc he was causing, and enjoying it to boot. My pulse beat a random, betraying rhythm. Clearing my throat, I shot him a mock glare. "Right then. Now, not only are you more powerful that the average human, but you've been given a gift that's considered rare and amazing even in the supernatural world. You can _read minds_."

All signs of smug, self-assured, strangely sexy Edward faded as Edward, King of the Martyrs returned full-force. "A curse as much as a blessing," he muttered bitterly.

The disagreement was so predictable that I felt as though I could've scripted this conversation beforehand. "While that may be true, you can't deny that it certainly gives you a leg up on the whole man versus fate totem poll. It's definitely worked to your advantage in the past." I could tell by his expression that I was not winning on this particular point, so I moved on. "You don't have to worry about growing old, or dying." I began to tick off my reasons on my fingers as I stated them. "Detrimental effects aside, you _are_ gifted with incredible physical abilities. And though I can't imagine you ever exerting this power, you _do_ have the ability to prevent terrible things from happening to the mortals you may know and care about."

I pinned him with a pointed stare, hoping to convey my meaning with the look alone, but in typical Bella-fashion my mind didn't hesitate to defect; images of me with glittering porcelain skin, frolicking with Emmett and Alice flashed incriminatingly through my thoughts.

Frowning, Edward straightened, shaking his head. "Bella," he warned, his soft tone bringing to mind velvet encased steel.

I shrugged, treading carefully on this incredibly unstable minefield. "I'm just saying... If the concern my welfare became too burdensome, there _is_ a way to eliminate the worry."

In his agitation, Edward suddenly took to his feet, muttering beneath his breath at a rate that left me only guessing at what was being said. I watched him silently for several seconds before he turned to address me.

"What you speak of is not a solution, Bella. It's a curse. One I will never willingly inflict upon you."

It was precisely the answer that I'd expected, and I sighed softly at Edward's predictability. How many times had I heard those words, or similar, since I'd made my decision seven years ago? Too many to recall, really. And every single time, despite the absolute conviction in Edward's voice, I couldn't help but wonder if there was something he and Rosalie had seen in me that they'd judged and found wanting.

It was with that in mind that I allowed an undertone of animosity to lace my words.

"Well, it's a good thing, then, that I have others who are willing to put my wishes before their own selfish feelings, isn't it?"

I regretted the words an instant after I'd said them. Unfortunately, I'd yet to acquire that handy time machine that I kept meaning to build.

He was on me before I could so much as think to be afraid. Long, fingers curled around my upper arms, cool even through the thick fabric of my sweatshirt. I was swiftly jerked from my seat on the steps, and the irate, yet still breathtakingly beautiful, face of Edward swam into focus, mere inches from my own. My breath caught as his gaze met mine, burning with an emotion I wasn't certain I wanted to attempt to name.

"Is that what you think, Bella?" He hissed quietly, his cool breath fanning over my face and making me dizzy. "That my decision is selfish?"

Though I knew the question was rhetorical, I felt one of my brows rise and unnecessary, trouble-causing words crossed my lips.

"Isn't it?" My tone implied that it absolutely was.

His laughter was harsh, abrading my quickly fraying nerves. He set me on my feet abruptly, and I grasped at one of the finely wrought newel posts as my legs shook in rebellion at the sudden motion.

"You think... That I'm being selfish?" he repeated incredulously, watching me intensely.

My stomach clenched and I suddenly wished that I'd just let the subject drop.

Still, if I didn't say it, he'd just have heard me think it, so I dove in, headlong and heedless of the consequences.

"Yes, Edward, I do. For reasons unbeknownst to me, you seem to think that you have the right to make every decision that in anyway affects _my_ life. Friends, clothing, my change..." He flinched at that and I felt like snarling. "What exactly is it that makes you an expert on what's best for me? Are they offering a Bella 101 class somewhere? Because they're obviously not teaching you that sometimes you just have to stand back and let me make the choices that you think are too dangerous or stupid or uninformed." I uttered a scoffing, helpless sound, the mutated offspring of a frustrated sigh and a disbelieving laugh. "You know? I'm sorry if my decisions upset or scare you sometimes, but I guess that's just one of the consequences of being part of a family; of allowing yourself to care about other people. It's not intentional..." I shrugged. "You say you're not selfish, but your reasons for wanting me to live my life as though I'm made of glass aren't exactly altruistic. It's not fair. We're two completely different people. It was hard for you, the change, but that doesn't mean I will have the same experience."

"Selfish..." He repeated the word quietly, more to himself, it seemed, than to me, and I wondered if he'd heard anything else that I'd said at all. He looked up suddenly, and his eyes were bright. I took a small, self-preserving step back as he came closer. "Selfish, Bella, would be destroying your soul simply to assuage my own fears. Selfish would be taking advantage of your naivety and allowing you to make the single greatest mistake of your life. _Selfish_ would be yielding to your misguided notions and keeping you with me for eternity. Don't presume to speak to me of selfish, Bella, when you are one of the most guilty perpetrators of such acts in this family."

The accusation flew from his mouth so easily, so condemningly, that I could only stare at him, reeling.

Edward thought that_ I_ was... selfish?

Ummm... What? What had I possibly done for him to come to that conclusion? I'd always tried to make sure that the Cullens knew how greatly I appreciated everything that they'd given me and done for me...

I tried to be careful... With the blood... And...

"_What?_" I squawked, when my voice finally decided to be useful again.

"I know that you heard me," he snapped, an ugly sneer twisting his lips. "Unless you're playing dumb, a trait that really isn't attractive on you, Isabella."

I grit my teeth as he threw my own words back in my face, my fists clenching so tightly that I felt my nails digging into my palms. I drew a deep breath, praying for restraint.

"It's a shame that the whole vampire beauty thing doesn't seem to apply to personalities..." I murmured levelly, fixing him with my most icy glare. Sadly, it was only a fraction of the arctic glacier he was able to achieve.

"In which case, we need not bother changing you after all," he responded with equal vitriol.

"Why do you think I'm selfish?!" I demanded suddenly, taking a careless step toward him. If I'd learned anything from living with vampires, you'd think it'd be to steer clear when they were angry. My homicidal brain had apparently decided that to mean 'provoke them'.

He threw his hands skyward, his laughter mocking. "Oh, I don't know, Bella! Let's see!" His lithe frame moved out of sight with preternatural speed, and I felt his intimidating presence at my back before I could even think to be irritated. The whisper of his breath brushed over my ear, stirring the dark curls that rested there as he murmured, "Did you ever stop and think, Bella, what you're asking of Carlisle?"

I whirled to face my interrogator, to respond to the soft, insidious question, but Edward was no longer there. My heart was a dull roar in my ears as I spun, wide-eyed, searching for the predator that he'd suddenly become.

There was no warning when he appeared behind me once more, his lips at my other ear as his fingers closed with deceptive delicacy over my shoulders, holding me still.

"You are asking the man you call father to destroy the very thing he strives to sustain. We walk a thin line, Bella, and you'd ask him to not only cross that line, but return with the both of you unscathed?" I swallowed hard; the persuasive, terrible words worming their way into my heart and causing an indefinable ache there. "What do you think it would do to him, Bella, if he couldn't control himself? We wouldn't be able to stop him, you know, he's so much more powerful than any of us." There was a brief pause, and I felt him shift, moving back to the ear he'd first assaulted with his duplicitous questions. "Of course, you _had_ realized that was a possibility, hadn't you? After all these years, you couldn't be so naïve as to believe that there was no risk involved in this little charade." He stepped closer, his fingers trailing lightly over my arms, until he had my wrists in makeshift manacles. "That, despite his frustratingly unfaltering will, even Carlisle isn't perfect."

I stared straight ahead, afraid to speak, lest my voice betray my newborn doubts to Edward.

He was wrong. Carlisle would never agree if he didn't believe, one hundred percent, that he wouldn't hurt me... Edward _was_ wrong...

"It will be fine," I whispered, hating that I couldn't force myself to fully believe the words.

"I'm sure you're right," he murmured, his tone almost caressing as his fingers slid further down, twining with my own. I glanced at the single entity our hands had become, his alabaster and glittering, mine fair and pink-knuckled. "But surely even you can see that what you ask of him is one of the most selfish requests you could make. Certainly more selfish than my wish to keep you alive."

"He said it was okay... He agrees with my decision..." My voice was tremulous, and I hated that I was allowing him to do this to me. I'd never allowed these ideas to sway my faith in my decisions previously. Yes, I knew that it was difficult, nearly impossible even, for them to stop once they'd tasted blood, but Carlisle was different. Stronger... Better... He had always been honest with me about his nature; about his struggles. He would have told me if he thought it would be too difficult. I'd resolved myself to this long ago, and despite Edward's very strategic tact, I refused to let him manipulate me.

"Of course he agreed, Bella; as though Carlisle could deny you anything," Edward was sighing as I escaped the emotion-tangled logic that was playing out in my head.

The blatant fabrication was all I needed to break free of the self-doubting trance Edward had lulled me into. I closed my eyes, drawing a quiet breath for strength, and jerked my hands free of Edward's grasp. He took a surprised step back, eyes wide, as I spun on him, a trembling finger pointed in his direction.

"That's complete crap, and you know it!" I spat. "Carlisle has absolutely no difficulty denying me things that he thinks are no good for me! Which is more than can be said for you, by the way!" I smirked, knowing that I was about to deliver the killing blow to this argument. "You don't have any room to call me selfish, Edward, when you're willing to throw the man you call father under the bus to strengthen your own arguments. Don't you dare even think of using Carlisle as a scapegoat for your own uncertainty. He's stronger than you could ever _hope_ to be." The anger was back, blazing in his eyes, but my fear was conspicuously absent. My voice was calm, certain as I spoke. "My decision is made, and regardless of what you think on the matter, it _will_ happen. It'd be better for everyone if you'd just accept that now." I turned away abruptly, grabbing my forgotten book and stalking up the steps.

It wasn't until I was closing the door behind me that his quiet "Never", reached my ears.

* * *

"He said _what_?"

I glanced up wearily from my worn copy of _Dracula_, which I was probably never going to finish at this rate, and met Alice's gaze in the mirror. She was comically still, apparently frozen with surprise at my statement; a curling iron held aloft in one hand, a brush clutched in the other. Aside from the confused expression, which would've been a terrible marketing idea, she'd have made a terrific salon mannequin.

Clearing my throat lightly - she'd heard what I said - I gave myself a glance in the spotless, reflective surface, allowing her a few minutes to absorb the words. I looked great, of course. Alice's particular brand of magic never failed. I briefly wondered how Jasper would react, before returning to the book in my lap.

Perhaps ten seconds later, I felt the easy stroke of the brush, combing through my hair once more. "What did you say to make him respond like that?"

I bristled. "What makes you assume that _I_ said something?"

Alice didn't even pause, her smile mischievous as she met my gaze in the mirror. "Please, Bella, I know you."

I chuckled, waving her off. "I guess I did kind of initiate the exchange. I _may_ have called him selfish because he's so adamant about my staying human."

"You may have, hmm?" One corner of her mouth tugged upward in a reluctant grin. With nimble fingers she began to gather curls loosely atop my head, reaching past me to grab a giant bejeweled barrette. I stared at the monstrosity for perhaps a second, all thoughts of Edward forgotten, before grabbing her hand.

"Whoa, whoa. What's that?"

Smirking, she easily escaped my clutches to secure the glittering atrocity. I was briefly blinded as the overhead light caught on one of the enormous gems.

"A clip," she evasively replied, her impish grin making me worry what else she had planned for me.

"A clip, mmhmm, I see. And those wouldn't happen to be _real_ diamonds, would they?" I demanded, imagining, with no small amount of horror, dropping, losing or breaking the stupid thing. Whoever decided to make jewelry that was worth as much as a house was a complete and utter imbecile.

"Umm... Nope," she responded just a little too quickly, before hastily changing the subject. "So, what'd you say?"

Giving the vanity a cursory scan for other potential fashion weapons, I replied distractedly, "What'd I say about what?"

Sighing dramatically, Alice began to fluff a few limp curls that had the gall to disobey her. "What'd you say when Edward said that Carlisle might kill you?"

"Ohhh." Seeing nothing else that I could object to too heartily, I leaned back. "I told him exactly what I thought about his besmirching Carlisle for his own gain..." I shrugged helplessly. "I don't know what it is about him, Al. I can never decide if I want to kiss him or kill him."

Neatly arranging dark strands of hair around my shoulders, Alice laughed, the sound clear and tinkling. "I'm certain you're not the first girl to feel that way about a guy. Vampire or not."

I grinned, shaking my head and watching the light play off the clasp in my hair. It _was_ a little pretty… You know, in a monster rhinestone barrette kinda way.

Alice took a step back, glancing at me in the mirror, before nodding. "So, I can expect Edward to be in an even more awful mood than usual tonight?" Her words were teasing, but I couldn't help but feel slightly abashed for leaving such a grumpy Edward with the rest of my family.

"Well… " I hedged. "I think he was going to be a bit sullen, regardless, considering where I'm going tonight."

She smirked, striding over to the bed, where I noticed for the first time a silvery slip of fabric that looked suspiciously like a dress. "I think it's more _who _you're going with, hmm? Are you going to talk to him about it?"

I stood as she gestured me over, casting a worried glance at the girly-looking combination of silk and ruffles, replying distractedly, "I suppose I'm going to have to eventually."

"Undoubtedly." She nodded, smoothing the fabric with reverent hands, before grabbing the hanger, turning, and holding it out to me.

I took a quick, stumbling step back, holding my hands out to ward off her advances. Colossal barrettes I could tolerate. This was a different story altogether. "C'mon, Alice, I don't need a ball gown to play mini-golf."

Alice's eyes were wide, dancing with laughter as she turned to me. "Miniature golf? Who told you that Jasper was taking you to play mini-golf?"

"Well, there isn't exactly a lot to do around here. It seemed like the only viable option. I guess I just assumed."

Quickly leaning in and tossing the hanger behind my neck, so the dress draped down over me, she turned to my closet with a snort. "Jasper's a 'good ole' southern boy at heart. He wouldn't dream of taking you someplace like that for your first proper date." She was sorting through my assortment of tennis shoes and flats with an expression of disgust. "Later, maybe, but not the first date." More rummaging ensued, and I watched, half-amused, half-annoyed as my floor became increasingly littered with casual footwear. Alice finally heaved a sigh of dismay, before turning back toward me, empty-handed. She seemed surprised that I was still standing there. "Why aren't you dressed?!"

I scowled, countering, "Why aren't you harassing Jasper?"

With a tiny moue, she shook her head, "I tried. He wouldn't let me. Now put that on while I go find some acceptable shoes."

As the door clicked shut, I laid the dress on the bed to assess the damage.

It wasn't hideous. Far from it, in fact. It was quite pretty. Not nearly as trendy as something Alice might wear, and certainly not as seductive as anything Rose would, but still... I knew that I wasn't going to be anywhere near comfortable donning it.

Yet, for fear of impish Alice's devastating wrath, I would.

Shucking my comfy jeans and sweatshirt, I was just about to pull the dress over my head when Alice barked

from just beyond the door.

"Isabella Cullen, with straps like those, I _know_ you're not planning to keep _that_ bra on!"

Scowling darkly, I stalked over to the dresser, yanking open one of the many drawers and glaring at the hated strapless contraptions. Reaching for one at random, a 'Not _that_ one!' met my choice, and I allowed myself a brief fantasy, in which I shredded all of the uncomfortable garments.

"Instead of pretending that I have any kind of free-will here, why don't you just tell me which one?!" I demanded testily.

Alice was unfazed by my agitation. Her voice held laughter as she responded, "Gray silk with the lace flowers, near the bottom of the pile.

I'd begun to grimace before the word 'flowers' had even left her mouth. "_That_ one, are you sure?"

"C'mon Bella. You owe me! Think of what I could've done on the first day of school!"

Sighing resignedly, knowing I wasn't winning this one (it'd been a long time since I won _any_ where Alice was concerned), I grabbed the scrap of silk in question, struggling into it with no little amount of difficulty.

A man had obviously designed strapless bras.

Shrugging reluctantly into the dress, I was pleasantly surprised with Alice's fabric choice. The cottony silk whispered coolly and agreeably over my skin. Whirling toward the mirror, enjoying the flutter of the skirt around my legs, something I would never, ever admit to, even if I lived to be a thousand, I tentatively gave myself a once over with critical eyes.

I looked...

Well…

I looked really good.

From my head to my ankles, I couldn't find a single self-depreciable flaw, and it shocked me.

I was used to attractive hair and make-up, thanks to Alice, but even the dress...

Made of a deep, steel gray shimmering fabric, it seemed lighter than air, the skirt shifting lightly, rippling with my every motion. Thin straps led to a v-neck that plunged a bit lower than I would've chosen myself, but was still respectable; a ruffle of material attempted to appease my sense of modesty in that department. The waist was high, marked by a thin, horizontal line just beneath my breasts, and the skirt flowed down to just above my knees.

Huh. Alice had not only forced me into a dress, but she'd made me like it. That... bitch.

Turning away with a little huff (not to make my skirt swish, no, not at all) I found Alice watching me from the door, a told-ya-so smirk all over her face. I scowled uncharitably.

"I won't say it," she trilled. "I'm just glad you like it."

I didn't answer. If I didn't admit it, it wouldn't be true, right?

Apparently taking my silence for assent, she skipped in, her devious smile fairly terrifying. As she raised a small hand, I realized why my initial reaction to that expression was to run for it.

She held a pair of intimidating gray heels aloft; apparently tonight's objective was not for me to have a good time, but to break my neck. As I gawked, Alice simply grinned, tipping her head to one side and declaring decisively,

"You only trip once, and Jasper catches you. No harm done. Don't argue."

I fell back onto the bed, allowing Alice to strap me into the three inch death traps, vowing that she would have a much more difficult time of this when I was changed. I pondered my future vampire vendettas as the shoes' buckles clicked into place with alarming finality; the list was getting awfully long.

Alice patted my feet and encouraged me to stand.

I wobbled coltishly, glaring at my sister all the while.

It was a good thing vampires lived forever.

I was apparently going to need it.

* * *

Several hours later, as I slumped sulkily into the warm leather embrace of the front seat of Jasper's car, I amended that I may very well need _two _lifetimes.

Spread amongst my family, current company not even remotely excluded, I figured that'd give me just enough time to torture them as much as they'd (intentionally or not) tortured me.

Now, don't get me wrong. My night with Jasper had thus far, been pretty amazing. Of course, being my first date, I didn't have a lot to compare it to, but what girl wouldn't love a nice, compliment-laden ride into Port Angeles with an attractive, sweet-talking southern gentleman? Or dinner in a tiny, romantic Italian restaurant, nestled snugly in a quiet corner of town?

Or dancing...?

Yes, what girl wouldn't love dancing around with two left feet next to a man that moved with such fluid grace that it seemed he should be on all fours in a jungle somewhere?

Who in their right mind wouldn't love _that_?

Surprise, surprise. Me, that's who.

As I'd finished a plate of the most delicious Eggplant Parmesan to ever grace this Earth, Jasper had gone and ruined the entire night by informing me that our next stop was a small club that'd just opened up downtown; Noctis.

_I stared at him for what felt like eternity, fork in hand, a lump of masticated eggplant threatening to make an encore appearance._

_He smiled pleasantly right back at me, soft honey eyes laughing as he patiently waited for my mute-spell to wear off._

_Forcing myself to swallow the food that suddenly tasted no better than sawdust, I set my fork on my plate, pushing the place setting away with a frown._

_I opened my mouth to speak, closed it... Cleared my throat... Took a breath..._

"_Why... Exactly did you think this would be a good idea?" My voice squeaked embarrassingly, but really, he was just lucky I hadn't thrown up on him yet._

_He gently pushed my plate back toward me with a lazy grin._

"_It'll be fun, darlin'."_

_The endearment did absolutely nothing to curb by rising panic. My brows shot up as if they were trying to escape my eyes._

"_Fun? Fun?! How...Why... I mean... What?"_

_He took my hand in his cool grasp, pushing the fork back into my suddenly numb fingers. They closed around the utensil obediently._

"_Fun," he responded decisively. "It wouldn't hurt for you to come out of your shell a little."_

_Frowning, I stabbed the food on my plate sullenly. "I'm not in a shell," I muttered._

_His laughter was contagious and I felt my lips tugging upward traitorously._

"_Of course not, Bella. I just think it'd be good for your self-confidence."_

_A surprised gasp forced the bite I'd decided to take to slide down my throat, partially chewed, and I coughed spastically until Jasper's hand on my back forced it free. _

_Eyes watering, I stared at him incredulously, choking out raspily, "You think that having a large group of people witness my klutzy, nearly homicidal stumbling is going to help with my confidence?"_

_He'd apparently decided that whatever detrimental effects were to be had from my not finishing dinner couldn't possibly outweigh those that came with my near-death attempts to actually swallow the food, because he pulled my plate away and pushed my glass toward me._

_I took several thirsty gulps of water, peering at him skeptically over the rim of the glass all the while. When I finally placed it on the mosaic-tiled table, he smiled, that easy smile of his, and declared, "Dancing. You and I. We're going."_

_I heaved a not-so-quiet sigh and grumbled, "Fine... Yoda..."_

Now here we were, speeding swiftly through the dark streets of Port Angeles, on our way to my demise. Or at the very least, the demise of my ego.

"Are you planning on pouting all night?" he suddenly asked amusedly.

I shot him a glare. "The thought had crossed my mind."

For several minutes there was nothing more than the quiet purr of the powerful engine and the staccato rhythm of the rain on the roof.

"Dancing? _Dancing?_" I finally exclaimed, fiddling with the hem of my dress. I didn't want to antagonize him, but he had to know that taking me to do something that I literally considered torture was not in good date form.

"Haven't you ever heard of facing your fears?" His bemused gaze strayed from the road, moving briefly to my anxious hands, before coming to rest on what I presumed was the bit of exposed thigh beneath them. Blood rushed into my face, and I tugged the dress toward my knees, refusing to be distracted.

"It's not me that I'm worried about." I replied archly. "I mean, you're immortal, so you're safe. But all those innocent humans." I shook my head, shrugging helplessly. I had a feeling that, short of being maimed or dying, I wasn't getting out of this. "Just know that I'm warning you in advance. _You_ could stop the carnage before it occurs."

He grinned, the radiant expression almost taking my mind off the fact that we were pulling into a crowded parking lot, where huge flood lights illuminated the shimmering rain. Almost, but not quite.

Small groups of people were huddled together under umbrellas; running for the cover of the dark brick building's wide overhang. As Jasper slid smoothly into a parking spot near the rear, a group of squealing girls ran past, laughing hysterically over the fact that they'd forgotten to bring any protection from the rain. I sighed, rolling my eyes and leaning back in the seat.

"You're really going to make me do this?" I asked dejectedly, glancing at Jasper from the corner of my eye.

He was watching me intently, a ghost of a grin making itself known. "It would appear so."

I looked away from the adorable expression. I was far too weak when it came to sexy little smiles.

"And if I refuse to get out of the car?"

His cool fingertips, brushing lightly over my chin, made me shiver lightly. He gently guided my face back toward his, forcing me to look at him once more. My heart stuttered slightly as his bright gold gaze traced each of my features as though he were memorizing them. As for me, I was singularly fascinated with his lips and the faint flash of white teeth as he spoke.

"I'm not opposed to making a bit of a scene."

My eyes shot to his and I arched a questioning brow.

"Well, I figure I could just toss you over my shoulder and carry you in… little human." Familiar warmth crept into my cheeks as he enunciated the words with a teasing caress, a self-assured smile crossing his lips. Even if the very prospect of that suggestion coming into fruition hadn't made me cringe with imagined embarrassment, that damned smirk would have been my undoing.

I reached for my seatbelt as if my life depended on it, his chuckle echoing in my ears as I hopped out of the car and slammed the door behind me.

Jasper was at my side in a heartbeat, holding what appeared to be a business card in one hand, an umbrella in the other.

"Put this in your purse," he ordered quietly holding the bit of plastic out to me. Rain pattered on the nylon canopy of the umbrella as I reached out and grasped the item, frowning in confusion as I idly flipped it over and was greeted by the sight of my own face smiling up at me.

When had Jasper gotten a hold of my license? I grimaced at the unflattering DMV photo, perusing the information on my I.D. curiously. Hmm…and _when_ had I turned twenty two?

I looked up at him with a smirk. "What, you couldn't just dazzle the bouncer to get me in?"

His laughter was melodic, drawing several stares, and he slid an arm around my waist, tugging me toward the long line of waiting people.

"I figure you'd better get used to lying about your age, seeing as we'll be changing you soon."

Excitement fluttered lightly in my stomach, delicate gilt-edged butterfly wings tickling my insides as his words washed warmly over me. I looked at the handsome man beside me with a small grin, heartened by his vote of confidence in my decision, particularly on the heels of Edward's adamant rejection.

"I suppose admitting to being a hundred and thirteen might attract some pretty weird looks."

He chuckled, touching the tip of my nose with a cold fingertip. "That it would, darlin'."

As we neared the building I glanced over the crowd that would bear witness to my undoubted humiliation this evening. Most of the people looked to be just a bit older than Jasper and me... Well, me anyway.

A young, heavily-tattooed man was whispering to a dark-haired woman, who laughed and slapped his arm in response to whatever had just been said. A small group of lanky boys peered at the ground, listless and unengaged. They looked like they wanted to be here about as much as I did. Meanwhile, a tiny blonde woman darted about the line energetically, a scrap of black fabric tied to her back flapping wildly in the wind.

I did a double-take, escaping Jasper's slight embrace to unabashedly stare. There was no way that that could possibly be... a cape?

The girl ceased her harassment of one of the club's patrons, having noticed my gaze, and leered at me, licking her lips in a manner that made me long for a hot shower. The tips of her canine teeth were visible, sharp and pointed and I squinted through the drizzle, trying to get a better look. Now I knew I had to be imagining things, otherwise, she was wearing fangs.

Brows drawn together in confusion, I caught up to Jasper as quickly as I dared in these death traps heels.

"Hey Jas, did you choose this place yourself?"

He glanced down at me with a grin, taking my hand and tugging me against him once more.

"Actually, Emmett suggested it. I guess he'd come here with his human and he thought we'd enjoy it." He paused, a brief, awkward stutter in which he must have realized he'd brought up an incredibly sore subject for me, before continuing quickly. "He said something about us fitting in rather nicely. Why?"

I didn't respond right away; turning, instead, to peer skeptically at the long line that had formed to our left. If I knew Emmett, and no one knew him better than I did (Rosalie as the exception) something fishy was going on.

Laughing people had clustered off, leaving a few feet of comfort bubble cushion between the small groups, nothing unusual there. There was talking and flirting and giggling. All normal. Still... Something wasn't right.

It hit me with the force of an angry, bloodthirsty Edward, and I couldn't help but press my lips together, staving off laughter as the realization struck.

Rather than the bright, short-skirted dresses and semi-buttoned silk dress shirts that one would expect Port Angeles club-goers to be sporting, the line of people I was staring at had chosen from a wardrobe of the monochromatic variety. More specifically, nearly everyone had donned black, though a few dark purples and reds dotted the backdrop. There wasn't a tan skin tone in sight, and several people appeared to be in costume... Further inspection revealed that the cape industry was apparently thriving.

Emmett... had sent us to a gothy, vampire wannabe club.

Oh Emmett... A slight ache in my chest formed as I thought of my prankster older brother. This was just such a typically him thing to do. A part of me wanted to be mad at him. The part of me that was still livid with his infidelity wanted this act to feed the smoldering embers of fury that I'd been unable to fully extinguish. But it didn't. And I couldn't. I missed him...

"You okay?" Jasper suddenly asked, most likely feeling the heavy weight of my guilt-ridden sorrow, bearing down crushingly on my heart. His face was a mask of concern as his feet slowed.

I took a deep breath, forcing the overwhelming emotion away. There was plenty of time, eternity, in fact, to reconcile with Emmett. I only had one first date with Jasper.

I offered him a tremulous smile, nodding, "Yeah, I'm alright. Just thinking."

He watched me silently for several seconds.

I squeaked in surprised protest as he suddenly veered off the sidewalk, taking me with him into the street. He spun me slightly until we faced one another, drawing the umbrella down, shielding us from interested eyes.

His face, beautifully pale in the dim light, was only inches from my own, and I felt my heart betray me, as it often did, racing wildly and sending blood coursing straight into my cheeks.

"We don't have to do this if you really don't want to, Bella. I just thought..."

His breath, cool and sweet, brushed over my warm face, and I closed my eyes briefly as sanity abandoned me. If I was smart, I'd agree with him. I'd tell him I didn't want to do this, that we should hit the mini-golf course, or go home and watch a movie.

But there was something in the trailing words he'd left between us, something insecure that sounded strange coming from my confident southern vampire. Something that made me want to reassure him that I trusted him.

Plus, the expression on his face when he figured out what exactly Emmett had sent us into was going to be priceless.

Sighing resignedly, I shook my head, smiling faintly. Apparently, I wasn't smart.

"No, no. Let's... Do this."

The sudden touch of his smooth, cool lips to mine, brief, yet lingering, made my heart lurch straight into my throat, where it beat erratically for several seconds, before gently floating back down into my chest.

Jasper grinned lazily, dusting a kiss to each corner of my mouth, before laying the cold iron strength of his forearm around my back and guiding me towards the door; a conspicuous, blood red portal that was going to lead to a night of either crippling embarrassment or ironic amusement.

"Jas, the line starts back there," I protested, dragging my feet as I realized he was leading us right up to the burly bouncer.

He smirked, rolling his eyes as we walked up to the giant of a man, who gave us a look reminiscent of the disdainful glances Rosalie reserved for only the most pathetic of mortals.

"Sorry, fella, you and the lady are gonna have to wait like everyone else," he exclaimed in a raspy baritone that immediately brought to mind a gravel-laden river bottom.

Jasper affected a charming smile, undisturbed by the man's scowl. Reaching into his pocket, I watched in surprise as he withdrew several bills that I was scared to examine too closely.

"You sure about that?" he drawled, holding the money out inconspicuously.

I blinked. There was no way this was actually happening. I half-expected scoffing laughter, or swift expulsion from the premises.

Instead, the man gave us (Jasper, mostly) a quick, assessing glance, before smirking and accepting what I suspected was several hundred dollars. He ushered us inside with the wave of a tree-trunk arm. Angry protestations echoed as we stepped into the building.

The long hall that led into the club's interior was dark save for the eerie blue illumination of some black spotlights, and I laughed beneath my breath as a glance at Jasper showed his skin glittering faintly.

"What's so funny?" he asked with a chuckle, nudging me with his shoulder and steadying me when I inevitably stumbled. A shiver that had nothing to do with the cool air blowing in behind us slithered up my spine as Jasper's grasp, rather than releasing me, slid slowly down my arm. He reached my hand and laced his fingers through mine. I had to remind myself to breathe as his thumb feathered over the pulse that thrummed wildly in my wrist.

It really amazed me sometimes; the strength I knew they possessed and the restraint it must take for them to appear human. I peered down at Jasper's hand, pale and cool around mine, marveling that, should the whim strike him, he could crush my much more fragile appendage without any real effort at all.

I finally murmured, "Nothing," pulling him toward the pulsing, heavy throb of the club's music just ahead.

We emerged from the dim hallway and Jasper gave the large, humid room a calculating glance; the look something that I'd long since come to associate with typical vampire behavior. It always amused me slightly, all things considered, that they were so adamant about scanning for trouble. I mean, what could possibly be more dangerous than they were? A bunch of pale kids in capes pretending to be something they were completely clueless about?

"Anything?" I murmured with a faint grin, the irony of the situation we found ourselves in making it difficult for me to keep a straight face.

Any second now...

He shook his head slightly, messy blonde locks sliding forward to conceal a single topaz eye; my fingers fairly itched to reach up and tuck it back, but I managed to restrain myself. Barely.

"Nothing of any importance," he murmured, a thoughtful frown tugging at his lips as he brushed the irksome hair away. My shoulders shook with repressed laughter as his gaze began to dart furtively, skeptically, over the room and its occupants, taking in details he must have missed in his previous assessment.

The club's interior didn't deviate from the castle fortress theme it'd displayed outside; dark smooth stones making up the high walls (though many of them had been splashed with red paint, like some gruesome backdrop for a low-budget horror film) and black and gray brick had been laid in archaic patterns on the floor. Tapestries of what appeared to be famous scenes from many a fictional vampire story lined the walls, and there wasn't a single piece of furniture that didn't hint at blood, whether in color, material or shape. Red spotlights were tucked into the high ceiling, strobing over the dance floor; dim and stationary over the small tables scattered around the edges of the room. At the bar, a young man in full Dracula attire was serving crimson drinks in crystal goblets, and as Jasper scanned him, I heard a quiet,

"What the hell?"

The laughter I'd been holding at bay erupted suddenly, and Jasper turned toward me so swiftly I barely registered the motion.

"Bella?" He made the single word sound an awful lot like an accusation. As if I'd had somehow managed to orchestrate this whole thing when I hadn't even known where we'd be going.

I shrugged, laughing helplessly.

"_I_ didn't do this! I mean, I suspected, outside," I admitted. "But this is well beyond what I'd expected."

A low growl echoed from the depths of Jasper's throat, and I struggled futilely with my grin. It was quickly becoming apparent that he found this far less amusing than I did.

"Emmett," he snarled quietly, and a low wave of angry disappointment rolled over me unpleasantly. The laughter that'd been so eager to escape previously died in my throat, and I swallowed the bitter remnants with a frown. Why on Earth was he so upset? Did he really care that we weren't in some fancy, schmoozy, horrid little club that neither of us would be comfortable in nor like anyway? I glanced at his face, only to find him watching me worriedly. The expression gave me pause. ...Did he somehow think that my sense of humor had abandoned me so fully that I couldn't appreciate the mockery this club constituted? I tripped over my words, forcing the smile back to my face as I hurried to reassure him.

"Emmett, indeed," I huffed in indulgent exasperation, hoping Jas would pick up on the feelings. "This is so typically him. 'You guys will fit right in,'" I mimicked, dropping my voice an octave. "Well no kidding!" I quickly tugged our joined hands up into view, gesturing at the pale, cool skin of his, before allowing them to drop back to our sides. "You realize, of course, that we're going to have to get him back for this." I tipped my face up to smile radiantly at him, trying my hand at a reverse Dazzle.

I attributed my moderate success to Alice's handy-work. While he didn't instantly melt into a puddle of incoherent hormones, as I was prone to do, the expression of anger faded slowly, until his quiet laughter mingled with mine, making peculiar, bubbly warmth spread through my chest, reminding me of the time Emmett had snuck me some champagne at a New Year's Eve party.

Tipping my head to one side, I tucked my hair behind my ear. "So, are we following through with this craziness, or have you had enough?"

Jasper watched me silently for several seconds, his slow smile making my heart attempt several back flips. "Oh, I'll let you know when I've had enough, darlin'."

My eyes, having been briefly preoccupied with the lazy smirk that seemed so comfortable on his lips, swept up to meet the golden depths of his gaze at his quiet, suggestive tone, and I wondered whether or not he knew the effect that that particular voice had on me. I didn't know how it was possible that he didn't. I tugged my lower lip between my teeth, worrying it lightly, and as Jasper's gaze slipped to my mouth, a trickle of emotion that I was fairly certain wasn't mine surged hotly through my veins; a brief, scalding flash of... of... something. Gasping softly, I quickly looked away, several wildly inappropriate thoughts making me incredibly glad that Jasper couldn't read my mind. His bemused chuckle echoed in my ears as the feeling receded and my eyes came to rest, inevitably, on the dance floor, which, despite its oddly-clothed inhabitants, seemed relatively normal. I silently hoped that Jasper didn't plan to drag me out into the writhing crush of bodies right away. Never mind dancing, I'd be lucky to just stay upright out there.

Thankfully, he guided me to the bar, cool hands finding my waist as he helped me up onto one of the dark red velvet stools. His fingers skimmed over the silken fabric of my dress, coming to rest at the small of my back, and I shivered slightly. Having Jasper touch me, so innocently, yet so familiarly was far too similar to the dreams I'd buried down in the darkest depths of my memory, inciting emotion that I wasn't exactly eager to have him experience second hand. At least not until I'd figured out exactly what _his_ thoughts and feelings were on the relationship that was slowly evolving between us.

"Cold?" he murmured suddenly, his breath tickling the fine hairs near my ear.

Desperately trying (and failing, I might add) to keep my scattering wits about me, I shook my head in the slightest of motions and answered as eloquently as my malfunctioning brain would allow. "Um, no?" Ugh, was I asking him or telling him?

I could feel the weight of his gaze as he peered at the back of my head, but refused to look. I needed a second, just a second, to regain control of my faculties. It really wasn't fair, how easily Jasper was able to make me forget my own name. He uttered a small, noncommittal sound; one that seemed far too amused in my opinion, and dropped his hand. I battled a brief pang of disappointment, knowing that he'd feel it, and shook my head, clearing it of everything it'd picked up on its brief foray into the gutter. It was kind of nice, albeit unsettling, to have Jasper treating me like any human guy might. The flirting. The knowing smiles. The little touches. I sighed contentedly.

Jasper cleared his throat loudly, and I blinked up into his pointed stare, flushing as I realized he must've been speaking to me.

"I'm sorry, what?" I gestured toward the dance floor vaguely. "The music's kinda loud."

His chuckle stirred the hair near my ear. "Imagine how loud it is for me." I winced in sympathy, but he waved it off. "I was just asking if I could get you a drink. You know, maybe something to make _that_--" he nodded toward the cheering crowd that seemed content to jump and twirl about all evening. "--a little less frightening?"

Arching a brow, I felt the beginnings of a smile as I teased, "Why Mr. Whitlock, you're not trying to get me drunk, are you?" It didn't even occur to me to question Jasper's judgment on this. If he thought that a bit of liquid courage was called for, I was more than willing to go along with it. It wasn't like he was going to let me drive, or doing anything stupid.

His face was suddenly close to mine, his lips brushing coolly, delicately against the skin at my jaw. "Why Ms. Cullen, do you really think that I'd need to?" His voice was little more than a murmur of sound, but I heard and felt every word right down to the tips of my toes.

Was he... teasing me?

As I simultaneously attempted to force some of the blood out of my face and back into safer portions of my anatomy, while scrambling for something witty in response (all very futile, really) a slender, crimson drink menu was pressed into my hands.

Glad for the diversion, I glanced over the drink choices with more than a little amusement. It was like a prop from a high school Halloween party.

"Gee, I can't seem to decide between the Hemorrhaging Brain and the Seven Deadly Sins," I mused aloud.

Jasper peered over my shoulder, glancing over the list at vampire speed, before declaring,

"Personally, I think you'd like the Vampire's Kiss."

I grinned. Yeah, he was definitely teasing me, mercilessly I might add, but I couldn't help the blush that stained my cheeks. Lucky for me, the comment didn't quite cause my brain to melt and drip into anatomical regions that it had no place straying into. I tossed a glance over my shoulder, a small, sweet smile (the one I usually reserved for getting my way with Edward) firmly in place.

"Actually, Jasper, I think I'd rather have Gangrene."

He seemed momentarily shocked by my declaration, before he suddenly tipped his head back and let loose a bark of infectious laughter. Snickering, I pulled my (fake) I.D. out of my purse and slid it across the bar to Dracula, placing my order. As his eyes perused the information, I felt a small slither of discomfort. It intensified tenfold as I imagined him asking me to verify the false birth date listed. I was a terrible liar, and it would suck on a monumental level if my bumbling got Jasper and I kicked out.

"Better get used to it, darlin'. There isn't going to be a lot you can tell the truth about once you're one of us."

I glanced at his kind smile, bewildered. "How did you...?"

"Your emotions... I guessed the rest." His shoulders rose and fell in a graceful shrug.

Dracula took that moment to return my ID and placed my drink before me, bowing with a flourish and exclaiming in a heavy accent that I couldn't quite place,

"Enjoy yourrr drrrink, my dearrrr, for it may verrry vell be yourrr laaaast."

As he attended to the other patrons, I turned toward Jasper, a mock pout pushing my lower lip out.

"How come _you_ never talk like that to me?"

He smirked, shaking his head as he gave the room another quick scan. "Because I make a fool of myself often enough without adding that ridiculous accent."

I snickered, sipping at the cool, green liquid cautiously. I was pleasantly surprised to find that, despite the slightly bitter aftertaste, it wasn't half bad. A little minty, with just a touch of something fruity...

"Mmm," I hummed my approval, drawing Jasper's glance again.

"Good?" he asked with a grin.

I nodded, downing the rest of the drink swiftly, enjoying the warmth that spread from my throat to my chest, before tingling outward into my limbs.

He peered at my empty glass as I set it back on the bar, his grin rather sly as he muttered , "I'd have figured you'd draw that out a little longer."

I shot a glance at the tiny puddle of leftover liquid pooled in the bottom of the glass, before frowning at him curiously. "Why's that?"

The smile he gave me was warning enough, but there was nowhere to escape to. Panic sliced through me coldly as Jasper lifted me abruptly from my seat, carrying me easily into the living, breathing labyrinth of people.

"Wait, maybe, I need another drink!" I improvised, struggling lightly against his grasp.

He simply laughed as the crowd parted for us, and we made our way to the middle of the dance floor.

As he set me on my feet before him, I felt a low, calming wave wash over me. I desperately absorbed it and hoped for more.

"Why are you so scared, darlin'?"

I was certain I must look comical for the amount of disbelief that had to be written on my face.

"Let's see here... I'm probably going to make a fool of myself. I could potentially kill or maim someone. And I can just imagine losing this stupid expensive jewelry Alice made me wear!" I was really grasping at straws, and we both knew it. But I figured the more excuses I had for getting out of this the more likely he'd actually buy one of them.

"You're never going to see these people after tonight," he argued in that unfairly persuasive tone of voice. "Though no one's looking at you, and I'm rather certain you won't make a fool of yourself, what do you care what they think of you?"

Glancing at the tips of the designer shoes Alice had stuffed me into, I sighed quietly, almost hoping he wouldn't hear me above the din. "I care what _you_ think of me."

Jasper's hand came to rest on my chin, tilting my face up until our gazes met. "Do you honestly think that anything you do on this dance floor is going to change my opinion of you?" he asked seriously.

I shrugged, mumbling half-heartedly, "I...guess not."

He laughed softly and dusted a kiss to the tip of my nose. For just a moment the heat and noise of the crowd around us faded as Jasper's cool breath brushed over my cheeks. He pulled away slowly with a familiar grin.

"Alright then. As for your other concerns, I solemnly swear that I will not allow you to injure any of this establishment's patrons, or yourself. Even if it means getting rid of those terribly attractive, yet incredibly dangerous shoes of yours." If he thought I was going to protest there, he was sorely mistaken. I nodded my agreement. "And the jewelry?" He reached up suddenly and plucked the barrette out of my hair, tucking it safely away into the pocket of his jeans. I sighed in quiet relief, closing my eyes as his cool fingertips brushed over my scalp, shaking the loose curls free until they fell around my face. When I opened my eyes, he was incredibly close.

"Better?" he murmured as I peered into his honeyed gaze. His large hands tucked several stray ringlets behind my ears, his touch incredibly delicate, and in that instant I knew I'd lost. There was no excuse good enough to save me now. I nodded helplessly, and Jasper grinned.

The sounds of the crowd came rushing back to me as Jasper stepped away, breaking whatever spell he'd placed me under, and I grimaced as someone bumped into me from behind.

"Alright, so... How exactly do I go about this?" I groaned, frowning at the people around us. Several of them appeared to be caught in the throes of seizure, and far be it for me to criticize anyone else's dancing ability, but I did _not_ want to look like _that_.

Jasper's face held an entertaining mixture of disbelief and amusement, and I arched a brow in response to the unspoken question.

"You don't know how to dance?" He verbalized the question skeptically.

I felt an unusual rush of courage, something I ascribed to the drink I'd consumed, as I lifted my nose and responded archly, "I don't know if I do or not... I've never tried."

Jasper's quiet laughter rumbled pleasantly through me, and I smiled up at him.

"It's not difficult," he reassured me, a hand reaching around to press against my lower back, drawing me against the cool strength of his frame. "Simply move your body to the rhythm of the music."

I shot a glance at a small group of girls beside us, jumping about at seeming random. They were either dancing, or having an epileptic fit. It was most likely the former, as I'd never figured epilepsy to provide much in the way of the fun, and they all looked to be having a good time. "Like that?" I queried doubtfully.

He followed my gaze, his deadpan expression making me giggle as his eyes returned to me. Shaking his head, he drew me closer yet as his other hand came to rest on the bare skin of my shoulder blade. He cleared his throat, murmuring finally, "If that's what you'd like."

Laughing softly, I pressed my cheek against his chest, my hands rising of their own accord to lie along the back of his neck. He smelled so incredibly good. I didn't even know how to describe it; it was some enticing combination of vampire, laundry soap and man. Smiling faintly, I turned my head, burying my nose in the fabric of his perfectly pressed button-up.

We stayed that way for some time, swaying slowly to the gentle tempo of the song. Jasper rested his head lightly against my hair, and I listened to his breathing, musing silently over the fact that his heart wasn't beating beneath my ear. This wasn't so difficult after all, why had I been making such a fus--...

The song changed to something more upbeat and Jasper startled me by suddenly grasping my hand and twirling me away from him, only to draw me back quickly, my body pressed flush to his. My head swam pleasantly, a heady mixture of excitement and alcohol making me laugh enthusiastically. Jasper didn't give me even a moment to agonize over my clumsiness or my fear of making a fool of myself.

He spun me around the dance floor at what felt like vampire speed, lifting me easily off of my aching feet as we moved amongst the crowd. One song became two, and then three, and I grew more audacious as the club became louder, its patrons more unruly.

Over the speakers, a woman breathily bemoaned the loss of her cheating lover and I suddenly wriggled free of Jasper's grasp, grinning mischievously up into his curious face. Pushing at his chest lightly with one hand, I began to back away slowly, hips swaying with the beat of the music. His caramel eyes followed me as I slipped away from him; certainly not far enough for him to lose sight, but just far enough for him to lose patience. I tipped my head back with a low sigh, knowing he would hear the soft sound even above the steady thud of the song's bass. My eyes slipped closed as the music wound its way around me, beautifully melodic. I felt my hands lightly grasp the hem of my skirt, closing over the insubstantial material, before sliding slowly up my sides. I pressed my flushed cheek into my palm as it passed my face, before sliding up into the heavy mass of my hair, I buried my fingers in the silken curls, now a bit more wild than when we'd arrived, and lifted them away from my damp neck. Something that sounded suspiciously like a purr escaped my throat as a draft of cool air bathed my warm skin, and I grinned as a pair of strong, cool hands swiftly closed over my hips.

My eyes slipped open and I glanced down at Jasper, who was on his knees before me. Laughing softly at the look of supplication he gave me, I reached down and curled my fingers in his hair, suddenly, intensely aware of the proximity of our bodies. Leaning in slightly, I murmured simply, "The shoes, please."

His fingers were swift and sure as they unbuckled the death traps from my feet. He tossed them aside carelessly and I nearly groaned in pleasure as his hands cupped my sore feet, rubbing the tense muscles there before sliding up my calves. At that, I did utter a low sound of relief.

He rose to his feet gracefully, leaning close to murmur near my ear, "Better?"

I nodded, sighing blissfully as he drew my back against his chest. His cool skin felt wonderful against the warmth of mine.

His fingers closed gently around my wrists, and he crossed our arms across the front of me, locking me against him as a new song began.

I tipped my head back onto his shoulder, allowing him to move us slowly. I felt his breath near my ear, smiling faintly as I realized he was singing quietly to me.

"_Stranded in this spooky town, stoplights are swaying and the phone lines are down. Floor is crackling cold, she took my heart. I think she took my soul. With the moon, I run. Far from the carnage of the fiery sun."_

His hands suddenly strayed to my hips, and I allowed mine to follow. He shifted me slightly, and I followed his lead as he rolled my hips provocatively back toward him. I swallowed softly as the thin fabric of my dress did little to conceal the fact that I was quite obviously rubbing my backside directly against the front of his jeans. My breath hitched slightly and I closed my eyes. I trusted Jasper.

"_Driven by the strangle of veins, showing no mercy I do it again. Open up your eye, you keep on crying, baby, I'll bleed you dry. The skies are blinking at me, I see a storm bubbling up from the sea. And it's coming closer."_

My heart began to race as Jasper leaned in, his lips hovering just above the warmth of my neck. He breathed in slowly and I felt a low undercurrent of something dark spiral out from him. Did he see the pulse that beat quickly, just beneath my skin? Did he want to sink his teeth into the broad vein that connected my heart and head? The unpleasant thoughts were banished as I felt the delicate brush of a kiss dust my skin. When he spoke, the words were murmured against the racing throb of my pulse.

"_You shimmy shook my bone, leaving me stranded all in love on my own. Do you think of me? Where am I now, baby where do I sleep? Feel so good, but I'm old, 2000 years of chasing's taken its toll. And it's coming closer."_

Jasper's hand slid up my side, dragging slowly up my arm, the backs of his knuckles brushing the faint swell of my breast, making the breath die in my throat. He traced slowly over my shoulder and up the side of my neck. He tipped my head toward him and my eyes flickered open. I met his gaze, felt the warmth of his emotions encompass me, an overwhelming combination of lust, love, trust, friendship... and his lips were on mine.

I turned toward him, flinging my arms around his neck as he crushed me against him. His hands roamed my back, one fisting in my hair as the tip of his tongue flickered over my lower lip, seeking entrance. I parted my lips on a quiet moan and he slipped in. I clung to him desperately as he tasted every hidden crevice of the warmth of my mouth, stroked my tongue lightly over his when he sought to withdraw, enticing him to say. I felt the low grumble of his growl in his chest as I carefully stroked my tongue along his teeth. The world swam dizzyingly and I closed my eyes against the sudden motion.

Jasper was the first to draw away, which I realized was for the best as the light-headedness that was assailing me faded with my gasp of breath. He laughed softly against my skin as he pressed light kisses to my jaw and neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake. My inebriated mind wanted more, and I reached behind me, dragging the hand that seemed to content to hold me close down toward the curve of my ass. He obliged me with a low murmur, his hand closing over the soft flesh, kneading it as he pulled my hips tight against his.

"Bella," he whispered against my shoulder, not even bothering with the pretense of the dance any longer as we rubbed against one another like two out of control teenagers.

The murmur of my name prompted my heavy eyelids upward, and I was met by a familiar set of eyes. Not the butterscotch warmth of Jasper's, no, he was laving kisses across the exposed bit of flesh above my dress. But I knew those eyes. That disbelieving set of ochre eyes that stared at me so accusingly.

I blinked slowly, going rigid against Jasper as recognition hit.

"Edward?!"

* * *

**A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed it!**


	25. Screaming Vampire Orgasm

**A/N: Hey guys, here's a new chapter. It was going to be quite a bit longer, but I've decided to take the end and turn it into a mini-chapter that should be up early next week. **

**One quick, but unavoidable thing: **

*****Please be advised that this story is rated M. Per the terms and conditions of this website, if you are not at least 16 years old, you are not to view fiction rated M. If you are below the age limit for this site, please do not continue to read.*****

**Alright. *dusts hands off***

**Let me know what you guys think. Drinks of the mild citrus variety this chapter. Not quite lemonade; more like Tang.**

**~Ex**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 20

Screaming Vampire Orgasm

_Edward's POV_

What could I have possibly been thinking?

In what world would this have been a good idea? At any time? Ever?

As I peered around the crowded nightclub, my throat burning with customary thirst as the steady pounding of mortal pulse's beat against my eardrums, I couldn't help but question my sanity; a silent barrage of berating questions that were spoken, not in the voice of my own internal monologue, but in the voice I associated with Bella's thoughts.

I don't know that I could've made a more foolhardy decision.

I blamed my poor choice on my inability to think clearly around her. And any semblance of good judgment and acumen that I _had_ managed to retain had flown clear out the window when she'd declared that she would be spending her evening with Jasper.

Jasper...

The jealous rage that accompanied recent thoughts of him flashed through me, and a low growl built in my throat, but I swallowed them both bitterly. It wouldn't do to lose control. Certainly not with so many innocents about. Bella already looked at me as she might a monster, I didn't need to provide further evidence to confirm her suspicions.

It would be bad enough if she realized what I'd done. Like any common, mortal stalker, I'd followed she and Jasper to this... I glanced around the ironically themed club disdainfully ...place, and here I skulked, watching my brother and the woman I considered my potential mate from the shadows, wishing that she'd smile at me as she was currently smiling at him. Wishing to tear him limb from limb every time he put his hands on her. I couldn't imagine a more pathetic, nor creepy for that matter, scenario.

Admittedly, Bella had never expressly forbidden me from accompanying her on her date, but if she were to catch me here, the semantics that slightly soothed my own conscience would most likely only serve to further incite her already formidable temper. Despite years of practiced falsehoods, I couldn't concoct a single excuse that would make it alright for me to be here.

This was wrong. And I knew it.

Why did I continually do this to myself? And to Bella for that matter? Why didn't I believe that she knew what was best for her? Why couldn't I trust that she wouldn't suffer some terrible fate if I entrusted her to the hands of another; if I trusted that she could at least take care of _herself_ as well as the average human? Why was this so difficult for me?

The answer was one and the same. Because I loved her. Because I couldn't stand the idea that something might happen to her. Because I could never forgive myself if I allowed something to...

But she didn't deserve this.

Try as I might to justify my behavior to myself, I just couldn't do it anymore. Alice was right. If I kept up at this rate, I'd push Bella so far away that she'd be well beyond my grasp.

Shaking my head, self-loathing settling familiarly around me, I inched out of the corner I'd hidden myself in, determined to make my escape before I completely destroyed the precarious ruin of a relationship remaining between Bella and myself. Loathe as I was to admit it, whatever brotherly feelings Jasper and I had managed to retain over the years had thoroughly burned up in the atmosphere of our respective relationships with Bella. There was a pang of remorse that I didn't feel worse for that, but there was only so much brooding I could do, despite what my family members thought, and right now, it was strictly reserved for my love for Bella. Or more specifically, her lack of reciprocation.

With the best of intentions, I began to ease toward the door; anything too sudden would certainly alert Jasper to my presence. I batted away a frisson of irritation that buzzed in my head like an angry insect. Irritation that he hadn't already discerned my existence, that danger was lurking so near, and he was so busy kissing Bella that he didn't even...

I froze.

Jasper.

And Bella.

Were kissing.

Jasper and Bella... Were kissing!

And rather than witnessing the event secondhand, through vague memories, I was living through every torturous second...

I tried to look away. But like the bystander of some terrible accident, I found myself watching with avid, morbid curiosity.

The demon within stirred, sensing my sudden weakness as rage and jealousy ripped at me with torrid claws, each warring for dominance. Pain began to radiate through my chest, a dull ache that seemed to numb everything it touched as it spread to my limbs.

I needed to leave. Now.

But Fate is a cruel mistress, and it was entirely too late.

Bella, looking more beautiful than I could ever recall, with her fair cheeks gently flushed, her soft mahogany curls framing her face in untamable disarray, opened her eyes. Those cinnamon eyes that beckoned to me, even from a distance, to lose myself in their depths.

And they were trained directly upon me.

Despite the cacophony that surrounded us, her voice, a voice I would recognize anywhere, rose above it all as she gasped in disbelief,

"Edward?!"

I met her thunderous gaze steadily, silently acknowledging the reality that I was not to escape unscathed this evening. Judging by the sudden snarl of murderous thoughts that crossed Bella's mind, I'd be lucky to make it out alive. Relatively speaking.

"Well. How about that?" I murmured, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly.

How about that.

* * *

_Bella's PoV_

"Edward?!" I gasped, pushing at Jasper's shoulders as recognition steamrolled the pleasant, bubbly sensations right out of me. The moment the word left my lips, Jasper stiffened, pulling away jerkily, a frown marring his handsome face. He stared at me intensely for a moment, shaking his head.

"Not exactly, Bella."

I sighed in exasperation as I realized that he must have thought, in my lust induced haze, that I'd accidentally called him by Edward's name. Silly boy. Uttering a poor imitation of a growl, I grasped at his hand as he made to move away from me.

"No! Jasper, look! Edward is _here_!"

"Wha--?" He glanced up sharply, scanning the club's occupants swiftly, until he located his recalcitrant sibling. Their eyes met briefly, before Edward promptly began to examine his shoes. I half expected him to flee. Not that it would have done him any good. I'd already seen him and he had to come home eventually.

An unfamiliar smile began to curl the edges of my lips; a ruthless, dare I say, evil smile?

Edward had gone way too far this time. It was one thing to try and monitor my friends, because he was delusively obsessed with the idea that one of them was making me sick. And I could understand helping me watch what I eat, because he had infinite time to look up just what exactly polysorbate might do to me in the long run. But this. Oh this. He'd just officially crossed the border from Annoyingsville to Tyrantown. And frankly, I was looking forward to Jasper telling him as much. Verbally or with the universal language of a fist to the face, I wasn't picky.

I waited expectantly for a rush of disappointment laced anger, or some sort of desperate longing for vengeance to escape Jasper's control and mingle with the emotions I could claim as my own. Good thing I wasn't holding my breath.

What I got was an undercurrent of amusement and Jasper's quiet laughter.

"You're laughing?" I nearly snarled, brows rising in disbelief as my smile wilted into a vexed frown.

He shrugged, and I bristled, irritation prickling. This was not even remotely acceptable. How could he just not care that Edward had pretty much ruined what had been, thus far, a pretty amazing night?

"Trust me, darlin', if you could feel what he feels right about now, you wouldn't be nearly as angry," he soothed.

A wave of warm calm washed over me and I shook my head furiously, jerking away from him with a scowl. "Don't _do_ that! He _followed_ us here, Jasper! He's spying on us! How can you be so--" My hands gestured without my permission, something vague and waving. "--blasé about this?"

The cool weight of his arm came to rest on my shoulders, and he tried to guide me toward where Edward stood, as still as if he were made of marble.

I shrugged Jasper off, crossing my arms defiantly over my chest. "I have absolutely nothing to say to him."

Jasper simply smiled, ignoring my feeble protestations as he scooped me up in his arms and forced me over to the person guilty of causing me the most gruesomely homicidal thoughts I'd ever had. I'd rather have made up with Lys than listen to whatever pathetic excuses about watching out for me that Edward was about to spew.

Jasper eased me into an empty chair at the table nearest to where Edward was standing, still staring at his shoes as though they held the answers to life's most important questions.

"Edward," Jasper enthused, taking the seat beside me. I peered out at the dance floor, frowning. I wanted no part of this. "Won't you join us?"

There was silence for several minutes; minutes that ticked by like hours as a thin, quickly fraying strand of uncomfortable silence stretched between the three of us. Finally, I felt the table give a shiver as Edward took the last available seat. He tapped a nervous rhythm on the tabletop that brought to mind tiny, finger-sized guillotines.

"Imagine seeing you here," Jasper mused.

I wanted to kick him. Why wasn't he berating Edward? Why wasn't he telling him exactly where he could shove his terrible spying skills?

Despite my apparent detachment, my ears were perked for the inevitably predictable response. I was sure it'd be something along the lines of:

"Bella's safe with no one but me."

Or:

"As a human, Bella is terribly fragile and I can't let her out of my sight for more than a few seconds, because she's bound to get hurt."

Or even:

"I love Bella soooo much, and I couldn't bear the thought of her with you. Boo hoo hoo."

He couldn't have shocked me more when he replied:

"Are you kidding? I come here _all_ the time!"

My head jerked toward him so quickly that I feared I might give myself whiplash.

"I'm sorry, you _what_?" I demanded, the question slicing through the air toward him as sharply as a finely honed blade. I glanced at Jasper from the corner of my eye, to find him grinning lazily, obviously enjoying Edward's discomfort. I really hoped that Edward didn't think so little of us that he thought we'd buy this ridiculous story.

Edward nodded, just a little too earnestly. "Yeah! Where do you think Emmett heard about it from? Every weekend, if I'm not hunting, I'm here. I... Love it!" His hesitation, and the painfully obvious lie, brought a slight smile to my lips, against my better judgment. Perhaps this wasn't something that was going to completely ruin the night, after all.

Jasper leaned forward, elbows on the table as he rested his chin in his hands, brows furrowed in thought.

"Oh yeah? What exactly is it that you love about it, Eddie?" The nickname caused Edward to glower uncharitably. "I mean, I have my own reasons for enjoying it here--", he shot me a pointed glance and my cheeks immediately warmed, "--but please, I'm all ears for why you might return time and again."

Edward shifted uncomfortably, and I couldn't help but smirk as his dark eyes began to sweep the room, obviously searching for some sort of saving grace for the club that he undoubtedly considered an anathema; ignorant humans glorifying something that should be repulsed. Typical.

He must have decided to improvise, because he turned back to us with a genial smile, obviously hoping we didn't notice the lingering look of disgust he delivered to the happy crowd.

I arched a brow, awaiting what would assuredly be a hilarious anecdote.

"Well, I mean, there's all the people. What better way to help bolster my control than by evaluating my limits and testing them?"

Jasper chuckled, observing idly, "You haven't been breathing unless spoken to, Edward."

Edward scoffed, drawing an exaggerated breath. I could only imagine how heightened the smell of the blood was for him, with the warm crush of human bodies so close, and so plentiful. For a moment, just a moment, his gaze changed, darkening, until I was peering into eyes that reminded me of a starless night's sky. My heart skipped a beat as grim memories of the last time I'd seen that empty gaze, peering from Edward's handsome face, swam frighteningly to the forefront of my mind. He closed his eyes briefly, and Jasper lightly reached over and took my arm, watching his brother warily. Edward finally glanced, up, all smiles, his eyes having returned to their only mildly thirsty amber. "See? Control. I'm surprised this isn't more difficult for you." The words, spoken to Jasper, weren't unkind, simply curious.

My date smiled, that half-cocked grin that made my insides melt just a little, shaking his head. "I know my own limits well enough to know not to test them in a crowd of innocent people. I'm breathing as shallowly as possible, through my mouth only, and though the thirst is still there, it's not unbearable."

I glanced at him in surprise. There hadn't been any indication; his eyes were still the color of melted caramel, he was in a good mood... "Jasper!" I admonished. "You should have said something."

He shrugged, and I found myself momentarily distracted by the way his shirt clung to his arms. "The demand is always there, Bella; whether I'm around one human or many. It's something we learn to live with. I was having a good time." He smiled reassuringly, stroking his fingertips over the pulse in my wrist, causing it to stutter rapidly, before relinquishing his hold on me. "Now, Eddie, you were saying."

Edward frowned, obviously hoping we'd forgotten the previous track our conversation had been headed down.

"Well, there's the… Um... The décor. Though it's not to my particular taste, I'm sure that one of the nomadic covens might appreciate its stark, exaggerated, uh... macabre...ness."

"Not to mention the all you can eat buffet," I muttered cynically beneath my breath, drawing the surprised glances of both men at the table. I shrugged, unabashed. I'd been with them for quite some time, and it wasn't like anyone had slipped in a while. I was entitled to the occasional vampire versus human joke. "You were both thinking it, I just said it," I defended with a grin.

Jasper chuckled.

Edward was eying my feet curiously.

"What happened to your shoes?" he asked cautiously, perhaps realizing that his words to me needed to be very carefully chosen, lest my black mood return with a vengeance.

I shrugged, glancing at Jasper, who seemed rather amused. "I'm not sure."

Edward looked up, scowling darkly. "You're not sure what happened to your shoes?" he repeated.

I nodded, smiling serenely. "That's what I said. Their current whereabouts are unknown." I lowered my voice marginally, leaning forward to utter conspiratorially, "Quite the mystery..."

His gaze was accusing as it swung towards Jasper. Uh-oh.

"Has she been drinking? Did you let her--?" He suddenly leaned toward me, sniffing delicately and I turned my face away with a dismissive roll of my eyes. "Have you been drinking?" he demanded.

Though Jasper looked to be on the verge of answering, most likely to defend my actions, I nudged him with my knee beneath the table. I refused to let Edward ruin this night. I refused to be ashamed of what I'd done just because he was of the 'holier than thou', school of thought.

Time to turn the spotlight back on the true star of this twisted little show.

"Yes, I have Edward. Jasper suggested the Vampire's Kiss, but I opted for the Gangrene instead. Do you think I made the right choice? I mean, I know you don't eat or drink, but having been here so _often_, you must be familiar with the drink menu."

Edward scowled, obviously wanting to drop the pretense, but unable to do so without facing the substantially fearsome face of my wrath.

"No, I don't think you chose wisely. I think you should have had..." He grabbed the thin list from the table, pointing, at what seemed to be random, toward one of the drinks listed. "That. You should've had that. It's my _favorite_."

Jasper and I both leaned forward, peering at the selection in question.

Jasper immediately burst into laughter, while I pressed my lips together in order to contain the very same reaction. Oh, poor Edward. He was really in over his head.

"Really, that one?" I asked, threading more than a healthy amount of curiosity into my voice.

"Yes, yes, that's what I said. That one, right there. I have it every time I come," he rattled off the reply quickly, his tone irritated.

Jasper actually doubled over, his laughter shaking his broad shoulders.

"Oh, I'm sure that you do, Edward," he drawled between gasps.

Forgetting that he was supposed to be berating me about the (heaven forbid) one drink that I'd consumed, Edward looked at his choice a bit more closely.

I waited, watching avidly as his face contorted from confusion to concern, and finally to horror-struck mortification.

"Screaming. Vampire. Orgasm," he read, sighing resignedly. "My... favorite."

* * *

_Jasper's POV_

Edward had followed us.

I wanted to be surprised; to have a little faith that my dear old brother was above this kind of shit, but he just made it so easy to assume the worst. Probably because, when faced with two choices, he tended to pick the most selfish and thoughtless. As long as his needs were met, he either didn't care or didn't realize how his actions affected others. I sincerely hoped, and honestly suspected it was the latter.

Bella had been furious. From the moment she laid eyes upon him, until I'd bodily forced her over to our little problem, her anger had escalated until I'd actually begun to fear for poor Eddie's life.

I'd since been feeding her tranquil waves of subtle amusement, the emotion I myself was currently feeling, and I was relieved to see that her smile, albeit slightly strained, had returned.

I knew I should've been upset. And I was, of course, to an extent. But when I looked at Edward, when he'd caught my eyes for the briefest of moments, the mortified shame that he was emanating was almost _painful_. He knew what he was doing was completely fucked up. My tearing his legs off so he couldn't follow us again for a good long while seemed a bit like beating a dead horse.

Besides, Edward's awkward, bumbling lies about how he was a regular patron of this club, the type of place that went against all of Eddie's self-righteous beliefs, were far too amusing, and would certainly prove useful for later blackmailing purposes.

I leaned back, hands behind my head as he uttered for perhaps the third time,

"Sooo…"

The poor guy had been trying to escape for the better part of the past half hour, but Bella was in no mood to offer quarter this evening.

"Sooo…" she replied with a faint smile.

"I think I'm probably going to take off here," he finally mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. He must've realized there was really no graceful way out of this one.

"So soon?" Bella asked, wide eyed with feigned innocence. I coughed to cover my laughter.

He nodded in response, rising swiftly and nearly toppling the entire table in the process. I didn't even bother to hide my laughter this time, despite the furious glare it earned me. He must be completely shaken to plummet so quickly from vampire grace to a level of clumsy that put Bella to shame. I cast out for his emotion, catching nothing solid, but plenty of wispy bits of anger, frustration and shame.

"Sorry to have interrupted your… date," he muttered, righting the table and disappearing into the crowd before either of us could reply.

Bella turned toward me the moment she could no longer see him, while I watched impassively as he strode out the door, leaving a trail of thorny agitation in his wake.

"I can't _believe_ him!" Bella fumed, all traces of amusement vanished now that Edward wasn't around to see how bothered she was. I straightened in my seat, casting my gaze toward her slowly. "I mean… The nerve! And to _lie_ about it instead of just 'fessing up?!" She exhaled sharply, causing several loose curls to flutter upward.

I chuckled indulgently, letting her rant for several more seconds before cutting her off.

"Bella, darlin', letting him get to you like this is just giving him what he wants."

She assumed a sour expression, as though she'd just eaten something incredibly distasteful. "I don't care, Jasper. Why didn't you _say_ something to him?!"

I shrugged, shifting uncomfortably. I was quickly growing bored of this topic, and slightly aggravated in the face of her accusation.

"Bella, please. It's over and done with. I mean, come on, did you really expect anything else?"

She sulkily threw herself back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest and peering out at the crowd of dancers.

I arched a brow, recalling that position as the one she assumed when she was settling in for a long bout of silent treatment. "What, you're not talking to me now?"

She remained mute, and I sighed heavily.

"Alright then, let's get out of here. If you're so intent to let him ruin tonight, it's not even worth it to stay."

That certainly got her attention. "What? We're going to leave already?"

I was briefly reminded of a child who had been forced to attend an outing with its parents; one who complained for the entire duration of the trip, but when told it was time to leave, acted surprised and grieved the sudden departure.

"Are you having _any_ fun sitting there, stewing in your own anger, thinking about Edward?"

She breathed a tiny sigh from her nose. "No, not really."

I gave her a look that implied she had her answer.

Anger that had remained conspicuously repressed while under the battering ram of Edward's shame began to slither to the forefront, and I clenched my hands against the emotion, lest it escape and Bella should feel it.

Leave it to my martyr of a brother to ruin what had been shaping up to be a really good night.

Despite her initial reservations, Bella had been enjoying herself, I was certain of that much. And I could think of no way I'd rather spend my time, and I had an eternity, remember, than watching the gentle sway of Bella's hips as she moved confidently across the dance floor. Or the almost astonished wonder in her eyes as she realized that her feet weren't completely traitorous. Or the gentle curve of an unintentionally sensual smile that graced those rose pink lips.

And the feel of her skin, burning into my palms through the thin fabric of her dress…

Damn Edward…

I glanced up as Bella's voice reached my ears above the teeth rattlingly loud bass line of the current song.

"I'm sorry, Jasper. I just…" She tugged her lower lip between her teeth and my gaze was drawn to her mouth, not for the first time this evening. "…I just wanted this to be perfect, you know? And having Edward bust in was definitely not on the agenda." The corners of her lips quirked with a faint smile and I found myself answering the expression.

I reached over, taking her small hand between my own, awed, as always, by the warmth of her skin.

"Hey, you've got no reason to apologize, alright?" She smiled hopefully, squeezing my fingers. "Let's just forget it ever happened."

Only, there would be no forgetting on my part. Despite my words of wisdom to Bella, 'Forgive and Forget', I was going to have a word with Edward later, and it wasn't going to be pleasant. I wondered if I could enlist Emmett's help…

Bella nodded eagerly, gingerly hopping to her feet and tugging my hand so that I followed.

Grinning in an utterly mischievous manner, she murmured over her shoulder, "May I have this dance?"

Laughing quietly, I followed her onto the floor, wondering if there was anywhere that I wouldn't follow her.

* * *

Bella fell back against the car's front seat with a squeak of wet clothing against leather, laughing breathlessly while I quickly turned the key in the ignition and squealed out of the parking lot.

"Heat, heat!" She demanded, giggling as she rubbed her hands over her damp arms. Her once gently mussed curls now lay plastered to her skin, soaked and disheveled. Dark trails of what I assumed was eye makeup were making there way down her cheeks, flushed with excitement.

She'd never looked more beautiful.

I quickly reached toward the dash, turning the seldom-used heat up to high, barely noticing my own frigidly clammy clothes.

"I can't believe you," I muttered with a lazy grin as we accelerated past the Port Angeles city limits.

Her eyes danced with unuttered laughter as she peered at me skeptically. "Me?! You're the one that nearly got us kicked out!"

I scoffed, though she wasn't entirely exaggerating. "That was all you, darlin'. I thought you were gonna tear that poor little girl's hair right out. Rose would've been proud."

Bella uttered a disdainful little 'hmph'. "She deserved it. She obviously saw that you were with me. And you… You just had to encourage her to get a rise out of me, didn't you?"

I chuckled, recalling the slight trance I'd placed upon the presumptuous girl as she'd peered up at me so hopefully. It hadn't been entirely intentional, but the look on Bella's face, as though she could gladly rip the girl limb from limb, had been enough for me to up the ante just a little. Her jealous anger was adorable. Not that I was unwise enough to mention that to her.

Needless to say, Bella, a bit more outgoing with another drink in her, had not appreciated the advances of a scantily clad human woman toward me.

She'd returned from the restroom to find the woman struggling against my restraining grasp in her fervor to get closer. After a few seconds of inner conflict, indecision apparent on her face, she'd stomped up to us, grasped a handful of the woman's blindingly blonde hair, and yanked for all she was worth. Though she'd seemed appalled by her behavior only moments later, the woman had gone into hysterics, and Bella and I had beat a hasty retreat when the bouncer had headed our way.

"Hey Jas?"

I grinned over at her, listening to the sudden acceleration of her heart with amusement.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

I frowned in confusion. "For what?"

A languid smile lit up her face; the product of fatigue and a couple of drinks, I suspected. "For taking me out tonight. And encouraging me to step outside the tiny zone of comfort that I actually have when it comes to any sort of physical activity. And, you know, for not letting Edward ruin everything." Her voice dropped to a mere murmur at the conclusion of her words, and she watched me as though the sun rose and set with my very existence.

I exhaled quietly as unfamiliar warmth ignited in my chest, a pleasant, expanding sensation that seemed to burn more hotly the longer that I watched the girl beside me. Swallowing quietly, I reached out and placed my hand over hers, where it rested on her knee, giving her fingers a gentle squeeze.

"My pleasure."

She smiled, relaxing against the seat as warm air finally began to flow from the vents. We sat in comfortable silence, and her breathing took on the gentle cadence of near slumber.

She surprised me slightly when she murmured quietly,

"Do you suppose Alice is going to kill me?"

I shot her a puzzled glance. Whatever the reason, I'd like to see the pixie try; she'd have to get through me first.

Bella grinned, lifting one of her feet up onto the dash suddenly. I tried, I really did, not to notice the faint flash of pink lace that was briefly exposed as my gaze followed the smooth, pale skin of her leg down to her foot where her toes were wiggling. It was a lost cause.

"The shoes. I left them," she admitted, slipping her foot back to the floor quickly. I hoped that she hadn't noticed the intensity of my stare.

I peered out at the dark road, trying to get control of myself. What was wrong with me? I was 166 years old, not 15. A glimpse of coral fabric should not have me imaging pulling over, right here, right now and finding out what said fabric felt like.

When I looked back to her, I hoped my smile wasn't strained.

"I'm sure it'll be fine. Just tell her you lost them in a cat fight. She'll be more interested in the details than the shoes," I chuckled.

She smirked, nodding in acknowledgement. "I suppose…"

"Who knew what a scrappy little thing you were?" I mused with a teasing grin, recalling the fury on her pretty face when she'd hefted the other mortal away from me.

She shrugged nonchalantly, "She was putting the moves on my man. I couldn't just stand there and let her, could I?"

I glanced at her with a smile, putting more stock in two of those words than I probably should have. "Your man, huh?"

A delicate blush painted her face, flushing the smooth skin from her forehead to her chest. She peered at our joined hands, concentrating on them intently. I could hear her swallow before she murmured, "Well, I mean, if that's okay with you?" She took a fortifying breath, the rest of her words escaping swiftly. "Because I like you, Jasper. A lot. More than I probably should." The warmth was making an encore appearance in my chest, thawing everything it touched.

Bella didn't notice as I pulled off the highway, into a small wooded rest area; content to keep rambling about things that I'd have gladly listened to for the remainder of my days. "You let me be myself, and you don't treat me like a porcelain doll. I'm comfortable around you in ways that I can't even imagine being around other peop…" I pulled into one of the three parking spots in the abandoned rest stop and killed the engine. Bella glanced up, startled eyes on the windshield. "…What are we... Where are you…?" Curious confusion fluttered toward me from her direction.

I stared at her intensely for a few moments; her wide, dark eyes, the delicate upturn of her nose, her trembling, pink lips, before silencing the half-finished questions by reaching across the small space that separated us, pulling her into my lap, and crushing my lips to hers.

She stiffened against me briefly and I half-expected her to pull away, outraged. Maybe she'd slap me sharply like some affronted damsel.

Instead, she took a quiet breath against my lips, the heat of her mouth nearly my undoing. She shifted slightly in my lap, and I bit back a groan at the subtle friction.

Easing a leg over either side of mine, she straddled me, pressing herself tightly against my chest with urgent strength, her arms winding themselves around my neck. Hot fingers thread through my hair, clenching around the strands, and my hands slid to her hips of their own volition, kneading the smooth, silk-clad flesh.

She kissed me then, gently slanting her lips across mine. She was sweet; an enchanting blend of vanilla and citrus. I never thought I'd find anything that tasted as good as the warm flow of human blood across my palette, but this… I would gladly renounce blood altogether as long as Bella promised that she would always allow me access to these lips. A low growl rumbled in my throat as I hauled her closer.

The tip of her tongue laved tentatively over my lower lip, inviting me to open, and I obliged more than willingly. Her timid tongue stroked mine, a brush of fiery satin, and I groaned. I'd wanted to allow her control, to take things at her own pace, but that innocently sensual touch was enough to shatter my already faltering will. I couldn't have stopped myself from deepening the kiss just then if Edward himself had hopped into the backseat. Bella clung to me as I nibbled delicately at her lower lip, as I explored the cloying warmth of her mouth. I traced the perfect lines of her teeth, battled her tongue for dominance.

She finally drew back, gasping softly, and I silently berated myself for forgetting, yet again, that she needed to breathe. Her slender, feverish fingertips stroked along my face, coming to rest on either side of my jaw. Her tousled hair fell in a dark curtain around us, filtering the dim illumination of the single streetlight into nothing more than shifting, beguiling shadows. I peered up at her beautifully flushed face as she pressed tender kisses to each corner of my mouth, to my nose and jaw. My fingers eased slowly down her thighs to find that the hem of her dress had ridden indecently high up.

Her heavy-lidded gaze found mine, widening slightly as my cool fingertips stroked the bare heat of her silken skin. She shuddered when my thumbs mapped the pink lace that rested high on her leg, and a dark wave of heavy lust pulsed over me, testing my control.

"Jasper," she whispered, her breath fanning over my face, and I wrapped my hands around her slender thighs, pulling her hips toward mine. Her heart thudded wildly at the friction, flooding the confined space with her scent; the ever-present temptation of her blood, the tart undertone of citrus that I associated solely with her, and her sweet arousal.

I slid my hands up her back, laughing quietly at her faint disappointment, to trace the fine skin of her shoulders and collarbone. Leaning up, I pressed my lips to the small indent that lay between them, flicking my tongue out to taste the tiny expanse of skin. Her hips gave an involuntary jerk and we both inhaled sharply.

The heat of her core, even through the fabric of my jeans, was almost too much. I could think of nothing more that I'd like than to drag her into the back seat and feel it without the hindrance of clothing between us.

But I restrained myself.

Just barely.

I took the small straps that held her dress in place between my fingers, tugging them off her shoulders slightly. I glanced up at her, a question in my gaze, and she smiled shyly, nodding.

The steadily growing ache beneath my fly was almost painful by this point, and it was all I could do to continue at this torturous pace. If she were a vampire, I wouldn't have thought twice about dragging her out of the car, pinning her against one of the broad tree trunks, and making her scream my name. But she wasn't. Not yet.

I carefully stroked the straps from her shoulders, easing the silky fabric away from her chest; it fell to her hips with a whisper. Embarrassment tinged the edges of her arousal, and I could feel the heat of her blush as my eyes caressed the snowy skin I'd revealed. She was gorgeous. Every inch of porcelain skin, every freckle and scar, was perfect.

"You're beautiful," I murmured sincerely, leaning forward and breathing deeply of her damp skin. I pressed my lips between the soft swells that met over the center of her bra, feeling the rapid fire rhythm of her heart beneath the kiss. I stroked my fingertips teasingly over her sides, smiling as a breathless giggle escaped her lips.

"That tickles," she whispered.

I laughed softly, easing my hands over her slender ribcage and then further up, to cup the warm, full weight of her breasts.

"How about this?" I murmured, unable to help the fact that my voice was more growl than anything by this point.

She breathed a quiet "Oh", her back arching instinctively into the touch. Her innocent passion was almost too much.

I lightly brushed my thumbs over the hardened peaks of her nipples, eliciting another gasp as her fingers slid to my shoulders, digging into the unyielding flesh.

"Well?" I teased

"Hmmm?" she hummed wonderingly as my fingers continued to move slowly, oh so slowly, over the fabric that concealed her.

"Does it tickle?" I repeated.

She shook her head. "No, it feels…odd…"

With a quick twist of my fingers, I snapped the small bit of fabric and wire that rested between her breasts, letting the intricate undergarment fall away. Her embarrassment was swift and immediate, and I leaned in, before it had a chance to become the dominant emotion, pressing my lips to the heat of her skin.

"Jasper," she murmured hesitantly. I brushed my knuckles over her satin skin, and felt the retreat of her chagrin as excitement flared hotly once more.

"Odd… Good?" I persisted, turning my head slightly and taking her pebble-hard nipple between my lips.

Her fingers were suddenly in my hair, and she uttered a soft, panting cry, holding me against her as though she worried I might suddenly change my mind and abandon her.

The taste of her skin was unlike anything I could have imagined. I sucked lightly, carefully; all too aware of the strength I possessed, and that which she didn't. She pressed closer, her nails scraping over my scalp.

"Yes," she hissed. "God, so good…"

Her hips moved in a slow, persistent rhythm in my lap, dragging her torturous heat across the arousal that strained beneath my jeans. Over and over… At this rate I was going to embarrass myself.

I slid my hands down her sides, releasing her from my lips and eying her flesh, damp from my mouth, hungrily, before turning my head and offering the peak of her other breast the same treatment.

She was trembling as I yanked the hem of her skirt up to her hips, stroking my hands up the length of her legs. I didn't stop as they slid over the smooth skin of her outer thighs, nor did I stop as I traced the muscles that strained along her inner thighs. I pulled away, watching her face with quiet intensity as I brushed my knuckles lightly, teasingly, across the hot, damp fabric at the apex of her thighs.

Her breath caught for a moment, before she uttered a shaky moan, her hips jerking, pushing closer to my hand. Her arousal burned me as surely as the heat between her thighs did; a pleasant consuming fire. I wanted nothing more than to take her, right here, right now.

But, as it would be her first time, my car was not the best choice for such an undertaking.

The thought gave me pause.

What was I doing?

Bella was worth so much more than a fumbling encounter in the front seat of my car… Yet here I had her, skirt hiked up, dress pulled down. I fought a wave of self-loathing.

"Jasper?" Bella asked quietly, stroking her fingers along my face.

I glanced up, saw her lips swollen from our kisses; saw the small marks I'd left across her neck and chest.

"This isn't right," I murmured, shaking my head.

Uncertainty and shame washed over her icily, and she pulled back slightly, crossing her arms over her chest.

"W…What?"

Her expression, a terrible combination of fear and embarrassment, was more than I could bear. I took her face in my hands gently, bringing her close so that I could kiss her.

"Please don't think that it's because of you, it's just that I don't want it be like this; the first time. Not like this, Bella. You deserve much better."

The confusion lingered, mingling with slight relief, until they were both washed away by a tidal wave of angry resentment.

"Alright, then," she muttered beneath her breath.

She rigidly yanked the straps of her dress up, extricating herself from my lap and settling back in on her own side. Shoving her seatbelt into place, she stared quietly out the windshield.

When I made no immediate move, she huffed, "Well? Let's go."

I started the car with a frown, unsure of how else to respond. I hadn't expected this reaction; what girl wants their first time to be a rushed event, in the cramped front seat of a car?

She fiddled with the radio until I brushed her hand away and turned the volume down. Her scent still permeated the small space and I was hard pressed not to pull over and give her anything that she asked for; anything that she wanted.

"Why are you angry?" I finally asked.

She sighed and shook her head. "I'm not angry." The response was sugar-coated acid; bitterly saccharine.

"Empath over here. Can't really hide that from me."

This only seemed to infuriate her further. I didn't bother to attempt to calm her, she'd only begrudge me the effort.

"You can't just…" She scrubbed her hands over her face. "You just, always…"

Her anger was fast fading to mortification, and I couldn't help but smile just a bit. Whatever she was trying to say was something she really didn't want to.

Keeping her hands over her face, she spat, "You can't just keep doing this to me. The touches, and the kisses, and… Dad's a doctor, you know, so I know that this isn't all…" The heat of her blush emanated from beneath her hands, and I couldn't help but wonder why she was bringing up Carlisle. "You keep setting me up with these expectations and never following through! I mean, I know there's more. And you just don't let me have it! And it makes me restless, Jasper. You can't keep making these unspoken promises and then breaking them. Do you understand what I'm saying?" She parted two of her fingers and I saw the dark flash of one of her eyes as she peeked over at me.

Though it'd taken some sorting out, I understood perfectly. She wanted release.

I nodded slowly. "I get you started on the race, but never take you to the finish line?"

That drew a small, defeated laugh from her. "Yeah. Exactly."

I reached over, pulling her fingers away from her face. "You don't need me to finish the race, Bella." I was going to try and go about this as tactfully as possible, but I had a feeling that her embarrassment was inevitable.

We hit the boundaries of Forks and I slowed, knowing it was a particular irritation of hers for us to speed through the small town.

"What do you mean?" she asked hesitantly, as though she knew it was best to just drop the whole subject, but she was unable to help herself.

I cleared my throat, raking a hand through my hair. The memory of her doing the same, of the light scrape of her nails, drove a spike of lust hammering straight through me before I hastily banished it.

"I mean, you could take care of your, uh, restlessness…yourself."

Her hands fairly flew back to cover her face. "Jasper!" she admonished.

I laughed, not unkindly, at her reaction.

"What? Everybody does it, you know."

"Not me!" she exclaimed.

She was probably telling the truth, considering the fact that she never had the house to herself, and she knew how good our senses were. I could only too easily imagine the sounds she might make as she ran her hands down… I quickly cut myself off. Not helping, I silently berated my imagination.

She continued, as though picking up on my train of thought.

"You guys could hear me! That would be…weird. Beyond weird," she wrinkled her nose in distaste.

I chuckled. "Darlin', we hear everybody, doing everything. Rose and Em, Carlisle and Esme, Edward, Alice… There's not a lot you can hide in a houseful of vampires."

Her eyes slid sideways toward me. "Really?"

I nodded. "Comes with the territory."

She seemed to take this into consideration, before uttering simply "Oh," and the topic fizzled into silence.

We pulled up to the house five minutes later, and she hastily made a break for it, just like I knew she would.

I grabbed her arm as she threw the car door open. She glanced at me in discomfiture.

"Bella, I want you know something. I didn't stop because of anything you did or didn't do. Hell, I didn't even stop because I wanted to. I stopped because you, charming, beautiful, witty girl that you are, deserve so much better than a quick fuck in my car."

Her cheeks burned from my choice of words, but she nodded, smiling tentatively.

"Thanks, Jasper," she murmured, jumping out of the car and running into the house.

I sat there for a long time after she disappeared, thinking about our evening.

I was able to boil the whole thing down to one annoying conclusion:

Sometimes, having a conscience really sucked.

* * *

**A/N: There ya have it. Poor Bella is going to spontaneously combust before this story is over. :P No wonder she always feels so hot. ;P**

**As I advised in my previous note, there was a bit more to this chapter, but I've decided to turn it into a mini chapter that should be up before too long. I'm also working on a new chapter of Sweet Catastrophe. **

**Let me know what you think!**


	26. Interlude : Cupid's Chokehold

**A/N: Hey guys. Sorry it took so long, but here's another one. **

**This was a lot of fun to write, and hopefully it's not too confusing. Serious credit goes to my husband/beta for help with the fight scene.**

**It's a constantly shifting point of view between two different scenes. **

**Please let me know what you think!**

**~Ex**

* * *

Calefaction

Interlude 6

Cupid's Chokehold

**Normal Text: Bella POV**

**Italics: Jasper POV**

I ran to my room as though the Volturi themselves were on my heels.

I took the stairs a dangerous two at a time; wobbling precariously at the top before catching myself with the railing and propelling myself quickly down the hall. I didn't want to face Alice's curious questions, as though she didn't already know the answers, and I didn't think I could so much as look at Edward right now without hauling off and decking him square in the face; broken hand or no.

And Jasper…

My cheeks burned with the flood of memory that consumed me suddenly. I crossed the threshold to my room as though it were some monastic sanctuary, slamming my door in a resounding manner that I really hoped signified I was not in the mood for visitors.

I flung myself onto my bed with a low groan. How was I ever going to be able to face Jasper again?

I mean, it's not like I was ashamed of what had happened between us; quite the opposite in fact. I was glad that he had finally let me know that he was interested, but…. I didn't think I could be in the same room as him now without thinking about tearing his shirt off. And running my hands down the solid wall of muscle that was his chest. And then a little lower, to his belt…

Ah!

I shook my head furiously to clear those thoughts away. No, that would definitely not do. Not when you lived with a mind reader.

I buried my face in my pillow and screamed my frustration. It didn't help. All I could imagine was the last time I'd lain in this bed… With Jasper…

I threw myself off the bed as quickly as if it had caught fire.

I paced restlessly, dragging my hands through the mess I'd made of my hair. If only he'd gone just a teensy bit further… Just a little…

Sighing, warm and edgy, I abruptly ripped Alice's dress off, throwing it into the corner, because it was obviously the source of all of my misery, before continuing my sudden mission of wearing a path in the carpet.

As I crossed the length of my room for what must have been the hundredth time, I glanced in the vanity mirror, frowning curiously as I noticed several marks just beneath my neck. What…?

I stepped closer, flipping my hair over my shoulder and arching my neck to one side, trying to get a better view.

The skin looked irritated, flushed a brighter pink than the pale flesh surrounding it. I rubbed at the marks, faint scratches, and shivered lightly as I realized they were rather tender.

I swallowed as I realized that these were definitely not the product of my own bumbling… Jasper had left them.

My breath caught as my eyes slipped closed, and I allowed the memories to sweep me up.

Jasper's cool breath against the heat of my skin. The faintest touch of his teeth. The controlled strength of his hands as they eased up my legs.

His words…

"_You don't need me to finish the race…"_

Despite the sudden rush of blood to my face, I felt my hands moving, of their own accord. They traced lightly down my neck and over my shoulders; I brushed my thumbs along the marked skin of my collarbones. I imagined they were Jasper's hands, despite the damp heat of my palms.

Backing up slowly, I allowed myself to fall back on the bed…

* * *

_It wasn't hard to find him, most likely because he knew I was looking._

_I didn't bother to approach quietly. I needed this verbal confrontation as much as I wanted to feel the gratifying crack of his face beneath my fist._

"_Did you have a good time?" he mused quietly, turning with deceptive laziness from his star-gazing to smile at me pleasantly enough. A hint of something savage lay beneath that expression._

_I took several steps forward, feeling the muscles in my body tensing in preparation for the upcoming fray. There was no doubt in my mind that Edward and I would not be able to stop with coarse words and thinly veiled threats this time. We'd both known this would happen, it was just a matter of how far we were willing to allow it to go, just a matter of a catalyst. And he'd presented me with an untenable one this evening._

_I came to stand beside him, peering up at the night's sky with a faint smile. The cloud cover was so thick that even with our vision there was no way he could see anything._

_I nodded slowly. "Yeah, I did. Did you?"_

_He pondered that for several seconds, before replying quietly, "Not really."_

_I continued to nod. "You know that I can't let this go, don't you?"_

"_I'd have called you a thousand kinds of fool if you did," he admitted, rising to his full height slowly._

_The beast within rose its head, as if scenting the inevitable altercation. It immediately demanded control of my senses, and I gave in without fight as the image of Edward, my brother, transformed into Edward, the stalking martyr who was vying for the affection of the woman I cared for. He didn't deserve her. I was able to acknowledge, somewhere in the rational portion of my mind that I probably didn't either._

_Edward swung to face me, his smile no longer simply hinting at the monster he was, but fully bestial. His eyes were dark, a shade of onyx that even thirst could not bring about, and I knew that mine were as well. _

"_This was a long time in coming," he murmured as he began to circle me. I spun with him, knowing that with his speed, losing him for even a moment could significantly alter the outcome of what was about to happen._

"_It was," I agreed, clearing my mind. I wasn't foolish enough to assume that I was going into this with the upper hand. If I had any chance of winning, I would have to keep my thoughts to myself. Or at the very least, keep my thoughts away from my plans, and on things that would drive Edward into a mindless rage._

_Edward smirked, a merciless mockery of a smile, and a low wave of self-satisfaction rolled off of him. It was obvious that I was not the only one who realized he had the advantage. "Keeping your thoughts to yourself might be the least of your worries," he murmured darkly._

* * *

…My hands mapped the soft valleys that marked the gentle swell of my hips, crossing briefly over the smooth skin of my stomach, before sliding upward. As my palms tentatively dusted my breasts, I recalled Jasper's hands, cool, though they left a path of fire in their wake. I shuddered lightly as I brushed my thumbs over my nipples, much as he had done.

I knew that there might be others in the house, but I simply couldn't bring myself to care. I'd had to listen to Emmett and Rosalie's escapades more times than I cared to remember. And the idea that Jasper might actually hear me… I gasped as a low throb centered itself between my thighs. Perhaps he would come and join me…

I felt the blood that pooled hotly between my hips rush to my face, racing warmly through my veins. Would I actually have the courage to allow Jasper the things that I imagined I wanted, or would I shy away?

My mind strayed to the all-too-brief touch of his knuckles, brushing the damp fabric between my legs, and I knew that I would not be able to turn him away.

Trembling softly, my hands forayed down the soft expanse of flesh between breast and thigh, eliciting a quiet moan and a wave of goosebumps. I whispered Jasper's name into the dim hush of my room, recalling his onyx eyes, burning into my own as he seduced the responses he wanted from my body.

My fingers hesitated, briefly, as they reached the cotton of my underwear, before darting beneath the warm fabric…

* * *

_The first strike would have been invisible to the mortal eye; marked only by a brief blur, and a soft breeze. But I was all too aware of Edward's fist, streaking through the darkness and catching me square on the jaw. If I'd been human, he would have crushed my bone into nothing more than pulp, perhaps even knocked my head clean off my shoulders, but I wasn't. We were on relatively equal footing, and for his efforts, he received my head snapping down, forcing his hand back on his wrist until there was a loud crack of his bones snapping._

_I knew better than to gloat at the small victory. Already Edward's bones were cleanly knitting themselves together. At best, I'd bought myself a couple of extra seconds._

_I knew better, yet I couldn't help myself._

_Edward had vanished the moment the snap of his wrist could be heard, and he materialized now, from the shadows, his look one of absolute hatred. If I'd been in control of the portion of my mind that allowed for sentiment, I may have been upset that there was so little left between us. But there was no room for such things just now._

"_You punch like a girl," I taunted with a sneer. Shaking my head, I pondered briefly. "No, no, I think Bella could probably take you easily."_

_I didn't allow him to respond, hoping my provoking words would be enough to keep him from picking up on the telegraph of my thoughts. I launched myself at him. My left shoulder struck him firmly in chest, the force of it would have shattered every bone in a mortal body, but he was simply thrown backward, into the dark expanse of woods that surrounded our home. I glanced briefly up at the windows that housed my room and saw Alice standing there, illuminated faintly. Her expression was reproachful, but there was no stopping now._

_I sped into the woods. The chase had begun._

* * *

My eyes slipped closed, and I felt the faint tickle of my lashes fluttering against the warmth of my cheeks. I exhaled shakily, my heart racing swiftly, blood roaring dully in my ears.

I traced the fine hairs that led across my lower stomach, the image of Jasper, lying on his side next to me, watching me intensely as his hand explored causing my hips to jerk slightly.

I took my lower lip between my teeth, hissing softly as my fingers slid lower, touching the damp heat between my legs. I was incredibly wet, Jasper's doing, and I eased a fingertip between my folds. I wasn't precisely certain how to go about this, what to touch, what to do…

My fingers brushed the small bundle of nerves at the apex of my sex, and all thought was obliterated, my back arching as I pressed closer to my hand. That seemed like a good place to begin.

I carefully circled the tiny nub, realizing quickly that too much direct stimulation was exactly that, too much. The fantasy resumed without my consent, but I didn't protest; Jasper's big hand nestled coolly between the trembling warmth of my thighs, his fingers easily finding what pleased me. I couldn't imagine anything that he did wouldn't be pleasing.

My head began to move gently from side to side, soft strands of hair clinging lightly to the fine sheen of sweat that glistened on my face. Something was happening… Building…

* * *

_He was close. I could feel the hostility of his anger rolling over me in cold waves. I could hear the quiet rustle as he moved, nearby, yet I couldn't see him._

"_I've got it, Edward, you're fast. Sadly, that seems to be all you have going for you. Why don't you come out, you little cow-"_

_The words died in my throat as his fist connected solidly with the side of my head, pain shuddering down my spine as my ears began to ring. "Fuck!" I spat, clutching my head and willing the white noise to stop. Edward was not the strongest of us, but the speed he'd sent behind the attack was enough to momentarily disorient me. _

_It was his turn._

"_And here, Alice told me you were some great fighter. Trained scores of newborn vampire armies. They mustn't have lasted very long, if this is all you showed them," he spat. "You have how many years on me? Even by mortal standards, it's rather embarrassing to be beat by one's younger brother. What kind of protector will you make for Bella?"_

_His words caused something within me to snap. Between bringing up a past that I wished to forget, and suggesting that I was not fit to be Bella's mate, I found that rage nearly blinded me. Combined with his own, I realized vaguely that we had entered dangerous ground. That this may not end well._

_He made to strike again, an uppercut that would have thrown me feet into the air, but I rolled aside, easily avoiding the blow. Low to the ground, my hand flashed out, striking Edward with cruel precision in the side of his knee. He stumbled, leg buckling, and I gave him a rough shove that sent him staggering ungracefully into a small copse of fir trees. His skull cracked resoundingly against one of the ancient trunks, and I felt a morbidly satisfied smile tug at the corner of my lips._

_In his fury, Edward snarled, grasping the tree and ripping it from the ground, roots still clinging to the soil. He threw the makeshift missile at me, and I dodged, ducking instinctively as it shattered into large splinters upon impact with another tree. _

"_You son of a bitch," Edward snarled._

_I felt a savage smirk twist my lips._

"_Don't talk about Esme that way, Edward," I chastised, before leaping forward. He couldn't have possibly expected what was coming, and with smug satisfaction, I brought my knee up cruelly between his legs. _

_I heard the breath rush from his lungs. Poor bastard. _

_Though it was nearly impossible for mortals to hurt us, with our strength we were not beyond inflicting misery upon one another. And Edward was experiencing just how painful that could be. He collapsed onto the needle-ridden ground, his face even more ashen than normal._

_I shook my head, giving a brief glance at the sky above us, the cloud-cover obscured by the reaching arms of the trees. "And here, I thought you'd put up a fight," I murmured, almost to myself. "But look on the bright side, I've just proven that, though seldom used, you actually have a pair of balls."_

_With a very self-satisfied smile, I glanced down, half expecting Edward to be holding his hand up to me in supplication._

_He was gone._

* * *

My chest heaved as I panted Jasper's name; a soft litany that seemed to only strengthen the images of him in my mind.

Pleasure pulsed through me, dark and heavy in my veins, with each swift stroke of my fingers over slick flesh.

So close… I was on the precipice of something, something that I knew would finally ease the restlessness that I'd been feeling.

I retreated into my memories, trying to find something that would give me that final nudge.

Jasper's cool breath as he took my lips…

Jasper's fingers as they cleanly snapped the material of my bra to get to my skin…

Edward's dark gaze as he pinned me to the museum wall, his thigh between my own…

I froze, fingers stilling as my eyes flew wide.

What…?

* * *

_The blow was as vicious as it was unexpected, and I found myself crumpling to the ground, not unlike Edward had done moments before, as a booted foot struck the middle of my back. I pitched forward, attempting to brace for impact, as my face struck small boulder, causing it to crack down the middle._

_Before I could regain my feet, Edward's foot came down again, a merciless strike to my head. Rather than a dull ringing this time, my head buzzed, and my equilibrium abandoned me. I could hear nothing as I staggered to my feet, leaning against the nearest tree in an attempt to regain my balance._

_Edward was in no mood to wait for the playing field to even out. He came flying at me, foot outstretched as though he meant to kick my head off. I swiftly reached out and grasped his ankle, twisting roughly until it gave a sharp crack, before throwing him with enough force to fell a nearby tree. I'd had enough…_

_I threw myself at him._

_My fists acted of their own volition, striking Edward's face, flashing out over and over and connecting with his marble hard nose, chin and jaw. He struggled, but prone as he was, he was no match for my strength. I reared up with a snarl, bringing my elbow down into the middle of his forehead. _

_He lay stunned briefly, a crack appearing in his skin, a trickle of dark fluid trickling out, before it was swiftly repaired._

_It wasn't enough. I wanted him to hurt, for everything he'd ever done to Bella. For making her feel self-conscious, for not allowing her to live, for interrupting our date, and for nearly killing her… I reared up once more, intending to repeat my previous action, but I was careless in my self-assuredness._

_Edward was fast, the fastest of any of us, and his hands shot up in a blur, a low growl rumbling in his throat. He latched onto my elbow with a horrible grin, twisting with all of his strength._

_I bit back a groan as I felt the bone strain, resisting briefly, before sliding out of its socket. The pain was intense, and for a moment, I saw nothing, bones grinding as my arm went limp. I fell away from him, reminding myself that it would be healed within seconds, that I had experienced far worse. Even as I thought it, I could feel the bones rejoining, knitting muscle and tendons cleanly back together._

_To his benefit, Edward seemed mildly stunned by his own ferocity, standing above me, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides._

_Idiot. _

* * *

Edward…?

How had he managed to invade my thoughts?

I growled softly in frustration. Even in my mind he was ruining Jasper and I's time together!

I shook my head to clear it of it's sudden Edward infestation, and eased back into my Jasper fantasy.

But it was too late… My traitorous mind had latched onto the idea, and there was no going back.

In my head there were now two sets of cool hands that roamed my exposed skin, two voices, one like velvet, the other calm and melodic.

I imagined Edward at my back, cradling me against the lean strength of his chest, his hands stroking over my face, through my hair, his lips on my neck. And Jasper… laving kisses to my chest, my hips, my thighs…

I shuddered, crying out softly as my fingers moved faster now than before, spurred on by these entirely inappropriate, yet undeniably erotic images.

Blood fled my limbs, leaving them tingling as it pulsed steadily between my legs.

Oh god… Just a little more…

* * *

"_Why am I an idiot?" he spat. "Because I'm not going to attack you when you're already down? Because unlike you, I'm in control of myself?"_

_I laughed quietly, recalling his twisted visage at the scent of Bella's blood. _

"_That was… An accident! You cannot even speak on the matter! How many innocent people have you killed? Or turned against their will? At least I managed to stop myself."_

_I shook my head, the ache in my arm subsiding. _

"_It's so easy for you, isn't it? To look down at Emmett, Alice and especially me from way up on your precious fucking pedestal. But you'd better be careful, Edward, because you're not Carlisle, and one day you'll fall. And when you're walking around down here with the rest of us, and catch a glimpse of yourself, you're not going to like what you see. You're going to realize that you're just another monster. And by then? You'll have shit all over anyone that could possibly care for you, in spite of it."_

* * *

It felt like betrayal, to be alternating the names of both Jasper and Edward in my whimpered pleas, but as I neared release, I was helpless to stop it.

And as I imagined each of their cool hands, sliding up my thighs, vying for space between them, I came apart.

For a single, breathless moment there was nothing, and I teetered, as though at the precipice of a very tall roller-coaster. And then…

My throat strained as I bit back a scream, the pleasure rolling over me in steady, sharp waves, causing my thighs to clamp around my hand. I shook like a leaf caught in a harsh wind, and my breath was ragged, as though I'd just run miles. Muscles I hadn't even realized existed clenched, over and over, and every second was exquisite, torturous pleasure.

I rolled onto my side several seconds later, gasping, my hand still caught between my legs.

Smiling sleepily, I buried my face in my pillow.

I knew that I was in trouble, what with my attraction to both Edward and Jasper.

But that could wait until tomorrow.

* * *

_My laughter was mocking, and I saw the anger reignite in his gaze._

"_Don't you ever compare us, we're nothing alike! Nothing!" He knelt swiftly and grasped the front of my shirt, lifting me before slamming me into the ground roughly._

_I grabbed his hands, yanking them behind his back and holding them in place as I spun us swiftly, shoving him face first into the dirt. I pinned his wrists against his spine with one hand, using the other to press his face further into the damp soil. Pettily, I hoped that he'd inhale some bugs, or swallow something he'd have to bring back up later. _

"_Nothing in common, Edward? Do we not both thirst for blood? Do we not both have difficulty keeping this savage demeanor hidden beneath our civilized façade? Do we not both love Bella?"_

_I hadn't meant to speak the words aloud. Perhaps I hadn't even realized the truth of them, yet as they escaped, the fight went out of him._

_Out of both of us._

_I released him quickly, shoving him away from me._

_He pushed himself up, swiping a hand over his face, before sitting beside me._

_We were silent for long minutes, before he murmured,_

"_You love her?"_

_There was no point in denying it, he would catch it from my mind eventually. I nodded slowly._

"_Yes, I do."_

_I loved Bella._

* * *

**A/N: Yay! Who doesn't love Jasper?**

**One quick thing, I haven't had a chance to respond to almost any reviews, but I still read them all, and they are a definite bright spot in my day. **

**So push the button and let me know what you think!**


	27. Revelations

**A/N: Okay, so I can never stick to the updating schedules I give you guys, so I'm just going to stop making promises. I'll update as often as I can. Sorry I can't be more consistent. My muse is a fickle bitch who often takes long vacations, taking my characters with her as hostages. **

**Hope you guys enjoy this one.**

**Thanks to everyone that reads and reviews, it means the world to me. :)**

**~Ex**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 21

Revelations

"A Halloween party?"

I echoed Alice's words obliviously, tearing my eyes reluctantly away from Edward (and the slightly bunching muscles of his back beneath the taut fabric of his t-shirt) where he was seated at the piano, playing something surprisingly cheerful. He hadn't moved for hours; perpetual, buoyant melodies filling our house, blending seamlessly into one another. It'd probably been just as long since I'd sat down to listen to him play, intrigued by these newest compositions, so devoid of his typical melancholy. The uncomplicated notes were fleeting and playful, dancing gently around the listener, like a cool breeze, and lifting them upon the music until it was impossible to even think of being in a bad mood.

Which was good, because the surreal awkwardness of the past couple days was definitely wearing on my attempts at a cheery disposition.

Things weren't bad, per se. Not really.

Just...strange.

_The morning after my 'first place finish', I made my way down to the kitchen for breakfast fully expecting Alice, Jasper, or even Emmett, no, _especially_ Emmett to tease me mercilessly about my previous evening's activities. Despite the frigid shoulder I'd foisted upon him time and again recently, he seemed content to pretend as though I wasn't being a complete and utter bitch. Not that I wasn't without justification, but the response to an angry sneer or the finger generally wasn't a dimply smile or a hair-ruffle. And that's exactly how he continued to respond, as though there was nothing out of the ordinary with our (currently one-sided) relationship. And though I cringed at the thought of sprinkling my morning bowl of nutty bran clusters with a healthy dose of mortification, I found that I wasn't entirely horrified by the prospect of getting back into the brother/sister camaraderie thing with Emmett. I missed him. I didn't want to, but I did._

_So when I crept to the swinging kitchen door as stealthily as a human in a house full of vampires could, hoping to determine just how red my face was going to get this morning, the last thing I expected to hear was my dad's raised voice, stern and chastising._

"_Please tell me that you both have retained enough sense to see that your behavior lately has been completely reckless! Although considering your actions of this past night, I'm inclined to believe that's not the case at all!" He scoffed, and my cheeks burned with a sudden blush as I imagined an uncomfortable looking Jasper sitting in the breakfast nook, being reprimanded for what we'd done the night before. But Carlisle wasn't addressing me directly, and he'd said 'you both'. Who was he talking to? I practically pressed my ear to the door as he began speaking again. "Do either of you realize what could have happened if a human had stumbled upon you?"_

_I heard Edward next, responding archly, a defensive edge coloring his tone. "To be fair, it's incredibly unlikely that a hiker or some other mortal would wander onto our property in the middle of the night. We were not at jeopardy of risking our identities."_

_Jasper's voice uttered a quiet agreement, and then there was silence. I held my breath, curiosity and a fear of being caught making my heart thump wildly. I heard nothing but its steady beating for several seconds, before there was a sudden, resounding crash from within the kitchen, something that sounded suspiciously like the delicate glass canisters that housed our dry goods shattering against the marble floor. I jumped, straightening as I instinctively jerked away from the door._

"_You think this is about our identities?" _

_Despite the distance, I could hear Carlisle's voice ring clearly through the decorated wood, his tone one that I had never heard from him before. My father was a paragon of patience and understanding; he was just and thoughtful and I'd seen him lose control on fewer occasions than I needed a hand to count. Whatever Edward and Jasper had done had apparently pushed him to that rarely reached breaking point. I wrapped my arms around myself with a shiver. I'd take yelling over this calm, arctic derision any day. _

_Neither Edward nor Jasper responded, not that I could blame them._

"_You think my concern here is protection of our damnable secret?" _

_I found myself shaking my head silently, unnecessarily; whatever this was about, it was quite obviously not about preservation of their secret identities._

"_Have you both forgotten that the very thing you so childishly fight over is in fact a mortal? A human?!" _

_Stunned silence met his question, not the least of which came from me. _

_Edward and Jasper were fighting over...me?_

_It had occurred to me, on some level of my subconscious, that they must be at least semi-aware of the relationships I had with each of them. With the gifts they possessed, it was really impossible for them not to know about the kisses, and more, that I'd shared with them both. And I'd also known that they couldn't possibly be on the best of terms considering this. But to hear that they were fighting... ( Did Carlisle mean that they were literally fighting; like fist-fighting?) Well that just didn't sit well with me at all._

"_And did it not occur to either of you that the likelihood of her wandering outside to see what was going on was, in fact, rather high?"_

_A flutter of nauseating fear that was not mine rolled over me, and I grimaced as my stomach clenched. _

"_If she had happened upon you while you were in the state that Alice saw the both of you in, there is no question that you would have killed her."_

_I vaguely heard the both of them denying Carlisle's accusation, but it was dim, barely audible through the annoying buzzing sound that suddenly swelled in my ears. My heartbeat fell away, breath dying in my throat, and all that was left was the white noise. A cold shiver shuddered through me and I lost myself, briefly, in the memory of Edward's furiously inhuman gaze. His taunting words, and his cruel hands. How close I had come to my demise that terrible night..._

_Swallowing quietly, I struggled out of the trap my mind had become, reminding myself that I had not, in fact, wandered outside last night, and neither Jasper nor Edward had made any attempt on my life. These were Carlisle's hypothetical fears. I was in one piece. I was okay._

_I leaned back in to the door, catching the finale of Carlisle's angry admonishment._

"_Bella is my daughter, as much as either of you is my son. If you want to beat one another senseless, I cannot stop you, despite my opinion. However, I will not tolerate either of you putting her life in danger, yet again. We have enough to worry about in terms of her health, and it would be beneficial to all involved if you could both set aside your hormones, and help, rather than hinder, our attempts to keep her safe."_

_I drew back with a frown, trying to process this latest development. My life was really starting to feel like an odd combination of a seedy afternoon talk show and an episode of Buffy. Yeah, things were always interesting, but it might be nice, if just for a day, I could honestly say that nothing at all had happened. That no one and nothing had made an attempt on my life, and I hadn't kissed one of my adopted vampire brothers, and my best friend didn't stab me in the back by causing my brother to betray his wife. Just a little normalcy. Was that too much to ask? I had a feeling that it was; that normality would never truly be a part of my life. Especially considering what I desired to become..._

_I was so lost in thought that I didn't hear Carlisle's quiet footsteps as he crossed the kitchen to the door behind which I stood, still stooped forward slightly in a pose that really didn't lend me a lot of credibility were I to deny eavesdropping. And I certainly didn't hear his hand land on the fine-grained wood and start to push it open._

_But I definitely felt it when the door promptly swung forward and whacked me in the side of the head, the force of the blow sending me flying backwards where I landed rather ungracefully on my butt. _

_I blinked, trying to clear the faint haze that clouded my vision as I peered up at the almost comical expression of shock on my dad's face. It probably wasn't very often that three vampires, two with preternatural sixth senses, and two that were definitely not fledglings, were so caught up in their conversation that they missed the fact that a human was standing just outside, listening._

_It only took him a moment to shake off his surprise, and he was kneeling at my side, cool fingers brushing the slight knot that was forming on the side of my forehead. I winced, drawing a frown from him._

"_Are you alright?" he murmured, and I watched as his clinical eyes scanned over my head, and then my gaze._

_I nodded, the slight pain already receding, my vision clearing. As Carlisle helped me to my feet I noticed Jasper and Edward standing in the open door, watching me with identically uncomfortable expressions. It wasn't a matter of rocket science to know that they were both wondering how much I'd heard. I peered back at them, equally awkwardly as I wondered just precisely how much they both must know._

_Carlisle broke the burgeoning tension by clearing his throat and declaring,_

"_It doesn't look too bad. I'm sorry about that; I didn't realize you were there."_

_My face colored as he shot me a pointed look and I rubbed my head with a small smile. "Um, yeah. Don't worry about it. I was just..." ...Just completely at a loss for an explanation that wasn't incriminating._

_And there we all stood, in silence that grew more painfully unpleasant by the second. I shifted nervously. Edward fixed his gaze on some point just beyond my shoulder. _

_Thankfully, Jasper saved us all as he strode forward suddenly, clapping a hand on Carlisle's shoulder, his signature smirk unwavering._

"_You know, Carlisle. It'd really be best for all involved if rather than injuring the poor girl, you'd help us protect her, huh?"_

Thus ensued a weekend that I really could have done without. Jasper avoided Edward, who avoided me, who avoided Jasper, who avoided... You get the idea. The awkward tension that had manifested itself between the three of us was terrible. Rose was gone, Emmett and I were still on the outs, Jasper and Edward were avoiding me as if they were still mortal and I was a leper, and there was only so much Barbie Bella dress-up I could play with Alice. I spent nearly all day Saturday and most of Sunday morning holed up in my room finishing the last of my make-up homework. A good use of my time, yeah, but not really the way I'd planned to spend my weekend after the great time I'd had with Jasper Friday night.

Plus, the silence left me with way too much time to think about things that I really had no solutions for.

I'd been so grateful for the distraction of Edward's piano playing, that I'd bounded down the stairs at a break-neck pace, and despite his sudden stiffening at my presence, curled up on a couch behind him to listen. Anything to keep my mind occupied.

"Uhhhh... Hello? Earth to Bella?"

I blinked rapidly as Alice's little hand waved in front of my face several times.

"Bella, are you feeling okay?"

The note of worry in her voice finally snapped me out of my reverie and I realized that aside from my initial response to her suggestion, I'd yet to actually say anything coherent to her. The blank look as I stared through her probably wasn't helping my case either.

I shook my head slightly, clearing my throat.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah. Sorry, I was just zoning out a little bit."

She murmured a sympathetic sound, "Understandable." We were quiet for a moment, before she rebounded. "So, what do you think?"

I bit back my immediate "About what?", as I realized that it might be a little insensitive to reveal just how much I wasn't listening to her. Shoot. What had she asked? I looked at her closely, hoping her body language might reveal some clue as to what she'd said.

Alice's pretty face peered hopefully back at me, her excitement a tangible thing. Shopping? No... Maybe a party of some sort...? Oh! Halloween! Yes, that's right, she'd asked what I thought about having a Halloween party! Here... My brief triumph deflated quickly as I immediately realized what a terrible idea that was. I wanted to be open-minded in the face of her obvious enthusiasm, but her suggestion of hosting a Halloween party at the Cullen house seemed rather imprudent, all things considered. Doubt crept into my voice, try as I might to restrain it. "Alice, I don't know. I mean, it doesn't really seem like the best of ideas to invite half the school--"

"The entire school," she interrupted quickly.

I chuckled, rubbing my fingertips across my eyebrows lightly to ease the tension that began gathering there. The entire school, of course; this was Alice after all, and Alice never did anything halfway. "Alright, the entire school, then. I don't think it's such a good idea to invite them _all_ here. To our house." I raised my brows and enunciated the words slowly and carefully, hoping she would get the gist without me actually having to spell it out. Her bright gold gaze showed confusion. I stared at her pointedly. "Where vampires live?"

She suddenly laughed; a melodic counterpart to the quiet backdrop of Edward's music. Her small stone hand landed lightly on my knee. "Oh Bella! We go to school with them all day, nearly every day. I think we're all more than capable of handling a couple of hours with the humans here."

Her words did very little to convince me that this was even remotely a good plan, but I didn't really have any rebuttal for that. They _did_ spend hours a day around humans, and there hadn't been any accidents thus far. Hoping to appeal instead to her sense of perfection, I hastily added, "Yeah, but Halloween's on Tuesday; that's only two days away. Is that really enough time to--"

Again, she cut me off. I battled a small wave of irritation.

"I've already thought about that, Bella. And you are so right." My relief was short-lived. "Which is why we'll be having our party the weekend f_ollowing_ Halloween, that way, we won't be competing with anyone else's Halloween celebration and we'll have more time for planning." She smiled brightly, perhaps a little condescendingly, and I immediately realized that no matter what reasons I might come up with as to why this was unwise, she would have a solution. Why was it so impossible to say no to her?

I glanced at the ceiling in a silent plea for the strength to withstand Alice in party-planning mode, and sighed in defeat, uttering the last-ditch question I always did when I knew I was beat.

"Did mom and dad say it was okay?"

Alice uttered an excited squeal and bounced up and down beside me, her eyes alight. She suddenly began speaking at a mile a minute and I struggled to keep up. "I was thinking we could decorate the entire place to look like a haunted house. You know, ghosts and mummies and witches--"

"And vampires?" I suggested wryly.

From the direction of the piano came an ill-disguised laugh.

Alice simply shot Edward's back a glare before continuing as though neither of us had interrupted.

"Esme was watching the Food Network, and she's got some ideas for these positively disgusting looking, but tasty, well for you humans anyway, treats."

I envisioned the wet noodles and peeled grapes from the grade school class parties I'd partaken in, holding back a shudder and hoping that my mom had better taste than that.

"We can set up a dance floor, and buy some creepy lighting. We'll have to hide a couple of Carlisle's pieces of art, you know, because it would definitely be suspicious, but that shouldn't be a problem, we can just lock them in his study. But first things first, of course..."

When did she find the time to breathe? I mean, they still had to breathe to talk, right?

"...Halloween costumes!"

All thought of vampire physiology faded and my stomach sank as I realized just what I'd gotten myself into. This wasn't just an evening of forced socialization with people that didn't really like us all that much; this was going to be a hellish, whirlwind week of crazed decoration and shopping. As soon as I was changed, I was seriously going to figure out a way to Dazzle other vampires. It seemed like the only solution to calm Alice's frenetic energy.

"Good luck," Edward muttered sardonically, and I very nearly grinned.

"Good luck with what, exactly?" Alice demanded suspiciously.

I heard Edward take a breath, and quickly started talking, lest he reveal my apathy.

"Uhh, he means, good luck... fiiiinding a costume. Err... So close to Halloween, that is."

I thought I saw him glance in my direction with a smile, but chose to ignore it. I was still seriously peeved that he'd interrupted my evening with Jas, even if that t-shirt did fit snuggly against every single muscle of his Adonis-like torso...

"Oh, gosh," Alice exclaimed worriedly, and I'd never been more grateful for the interruption of her soft soprano. "He's right! Those seasonal stores are going to be all out of the good stuff." Her lips pursed, before she actually leapt up in excitement. "Which is why _we'll_ be visiting a Costumer in Seattle! Today!"

The urge to groan was so strong that my throat actually hurt as I swallowed it back. A three hour drive just to get fitted for a costume that Alice would probably pick out against my will, which I'd wear for a single night? Not my idea of a good time.

Still, she was watching me with that expectant, pleading look, and I'd already begun planning what book I should bring for the short car ride. We both knew that I wasn't going to deny her. I sighed.

"Alright, Alice." I managed a tentative smile. Who knew, this might actually be fun. Away from the skimpy Bo Peep and school girl costumes that seemed to take up three quarters of the women's section at most Halloween stores, I might even find something I like. Suddenly, this seemed a bit more like an adventure and a lot less like torture. "When did you wan--"

"Now, of course!" she exclaimed with a contagious grin, grasping my arm and literally dragging me toward the garage.

Let's hope I was right...

* * *

Two hours and forty three minutes later (thank you Alice's crazy driving for shaving nearly forty minutes off our time) we pulled up to a small, cozy looking store situated in an older-looking shopping area. Across the street stood an old dime store, and a Trophy Engraver's bold, demanding signs encroached onto the Costumer's portion of the sidewalk. The single, dusty window was crowded with unique props and two small mannequins boasted intricately detailed pirate and ninja costumes. I was surprised to find the street outside of the shop nearly empty; what with Halloween just around the corner, this place ought to be packed.

"How'd you even hear about this place?" Edward asked as I pushed the front seat forward to let him out of the backseat of the tiny Bug.

I wasn't sure who had been more surprised when Edward asked if he could tag along, me or Alice. But she was definitely the quicker of the two of us to recover from said shock. She'd readily agreed with a chirped, 'The more, the merrier!' without even asking what I thought on the matter.

At least he hadn't said or done anything obnoxious yet.

Still, there was plenty of time.

Alice circled around the car to peer adoringly at the old shop, like one might an old friend that didn't come around often enough.

"Remember the masquerade that Esme threw, about twenty years ago?"

Edward shut the passenger door with a nod and a wry grin.

"How could I forget? You came dressed in the most ridiculously extravagant peacock costume; with, as I recall, a tail made from real feathers?"

"It was, in fact," Alice preened. "And I got it here. It's run by this older lady and her daughter, and they make everything by hand. Kinda pricey, but definitely worth it."

And there was the answer to the question that'd been plaguing me. Most people shied away from spending thirty bucks on a costume; if _Alice_ thought this place was 'pricey' I had a feeling that not too many would actually be able to afford the hand-crafted creations here. No wonder it was dead.

We headed inside with Alice leading the way, fairly skipping with her excitement. A small bell over the door chimed as we entered the musty, dim interior of the shop.

A rotund woman, in her mid-fifties perhaps, bustled over to us, a kind smile dimpling her weathered face.

"Alice!" she exclaimed, sweeping Alice into a tight hug, nearly engulfing our tiny sister.

Edward and I exchanged a surprised glance.

"Elizabeth!" Alice replied, taking the woman's forearms in her hands and giving a light squeeze as she stepped back. I couldn't help but wonder how much this Elizabeth person's warm green eyes actually saw; how much she knew.

She turned toward Edward and I, and I found my view suddenly obscured by Edward's shoulder as he placed himself between us. Alice looked embarrassed on her brother's behalf, while I was torn between irritation and gratitude. Though there didn't appear to be anything sinister about the woman, there was something... Something in her gaze that was far too knowing; something that reminded me just a bit too much of the way Alice watched us all sometimes.

"And who are your friends?" Elizabeth inquired cheerfully. I had a feeling that frowning was a completely foreign expression to this woman.

"The overprotective goon is my brother, Edward. And that's my little sister, Bella."

I felt Elizabeth's gaze linger on me, from where I peeked out from behind Edward, for just a moment longer than was strictly necessary, before she held out her hand to Edward, who shook it stiffly, and then to me. Her warm hand was calloused and I felt the faint marks of scars on her fingers. An odd sense of calm stole over me as she shook my hand, and I realized that whatever this woman knew was safe in these very capable hands. As if Alice had ever given me a reason to doubt her.

"So, what brings three of the esteemed Cullen clan to my shop this afternoon?"

Again, Edward and I shared a look. Cullen clan?

Alice sighed her exasperation at our obvious hesitance, before pointedly let us know that she was ignoring us as she sniffed and turned away, her tiny nose in the air.

"Well, I've decided to throw a Halloween party this year, and you know that I won't stand for anything less than best dressed." Alice paused, glancing about. "Is your mother around, I've got an absolutely fabulous idea, but I'm not sure if it can be completed in a week."

I thought I saw a moment's distress flash upon Elizabeth's face, but it was gone so quickly that I wondered if I'd imagined it. She shook her head slowly, her smile dampening until it was just a tiny curve of her lips.

"Unfortunately, mother died two years ago."

Alice looked appalled by her faux pas. "I'm so sorry!"

"It's alright dear, quite alright." Elizabeth patted Alice's hand. "She went quite readily. It was simply her time." There was a moment of uncomfortable silence, before Elizabeth picked right back up with the excited chatter. "Now, about this idea of yours, you must tell me all about it. I'm certain that it can be done."

As they disappeared into a small back office, I shrugged.

"Guess we can just look around out here then."

Edward rubbed the back of his neck, nodding.

"Guess so."

We shared an awkward glance before splitting up to wander the confined space. Mannequins and costumes filled every spare inch of space while garment boxes, some faded and ancient looking, some bright and new, lined shelf after shelf upon the walls. A glittering case was filled with expensive looking jewelry and hair combs. I had to admit, it was pretty impressive, and a far cry from the typical Halloween store.

I thumbed through a couple of catalogues that lay against the walls, curiously peering at realistic mummy and witch costumes. The final page, a demon of some sort, actually made me give a small gasp of fright. Wow. These were great.

I turned away from the faded photos to browse the selection. The first thing to catch my eye was a gorgeous, gold and silver gown. It looked like it must've been modeled after something from the 1800s, with a beautiful cinched bodice and a huge bustle and train. I reverently brushed my fingers over the silken fabric. It was stunning, but it was also a little flamboyant for me. Rosalie could probably pull that off, but I'd be lucky to remain upright.

The next slender mannequin wore a simple white, crushed velvet gown. Sleeveless, the neckline of the gown was split straight down the torso to reveal the small indent of the dummy's navel. A delicate gold sash lay low on its hips, while a gold heart pendant lay between its breasts. A wig of blonde curls was perched on the mannequin's head, an intricate crown of tiny gold hearts nestled in its hair. I assumed this was supposed to be Aphrodite. It was pretty, but revealed just a bit too much skin for my liking. Again, another Rose costume.

"Wow, Bella, are you actually thinking of wearing that?" Alice exclaimed near my ear, causing me to jump about a foot in the air. I clutched my chest, where my heart was racing, scowling over my shoulder at her.

"Of course not, I could never pull that off."

Alice tutted beneath her breath. "You really don't give yourself enough credit, Bella. You're beautiful."

I rolled my eyes. "Did you get your costume squared away?" I'd suffer hours of costume regaling if it meant we didn't have to talk about my looks.

She nodded excitedly. "Oh yeah. It's going to be awesome."

I didn't doubt it.

"What about you though? Find anything you like yet?" she asked curiously.

I shook my head. "I mean, everything's great and all, but just nothing that I'd really wear."

"How about this?" she asked, as we slipped through the small gaps between the dummies. I glanced in the direction she was pointing, frowning immediately.

"Seriously, Alice?"

What appeared to be real leather armor clad the mannequin, though I didn't imagine that a skirt that short would really protect against much of anything. Small, brown flaps with bright silver studs lay over a darker layer of leather, all of which landed less than two inches below the mannequin's bum. A broad leather belt, decorated with a shining silver stag head lay over a leather chest piece, also decorated with silver studs. More shining silver, molded into the shape of a hawk, lay across the dummy's breasts, offering it a minimal layer of protection, while silver bracers, over a set of leather wrist guards and a pair of leather shoulders, each housing a running silver stag, completed the ensemble. A long bow was slung over the mannequin's shoulder.

"What?" Alice questioned innocently. "It's Artemis. You'd look great in this."

"I'd freeze my ass off in that; literally," I grumbled.

"C'mon Bella, lighten up! It's Halloween. It's okay to show yourself off a little. You're supposed to take on a whole new persona, you know, not be you for a night."

Poor Alice was clearly getting exasperated with my modesty.

"I'm sorry, Alice, I just wouldn't be comfortable in that."

She sighed, loud and long, before nodding, and pulling me along.

We must have looked at dozens of costumes, and I was growing more irritable and dejected as the afternoon wore on. Until finally, as Alice disappeared to confer with Elizabeth about crystal beads, of all things, I stumbled through the last bit of the maze of dummies.

And there it was.

It wasn't the boldest of the costumes here, nor was it the sexiest.

But it was amazing. Subtly beautiful, it was the type of costume that you had to look twice at to truly appreciate just how lovely it was.

I nearly tripped over my own feet in my haste to get closer, as though it might suddenly disappear if I didn't claim it.

It was a dress, circa 1900, perhaps, and a hat that might have put Alice's peacock feather tail to shame.

A black and white creation, it consisted of a delicately patterned white under-dress, made of some material that felt to be a wonderful combination of silk and velvet. Tiny silver beads sparkled from within the embroidery, which lay in indiscernible patterns down the front of the dress. A rippling, black bodice of silk lay over this, its square neckline modest, though it was cut away just beneath the breasts to reveal the amazing needlework on the white fabric beneath. A black parasol was attached to the dummy's hand, and I could just make out the delicately wrought lace. But what really got me, was the hat. It was...big; black and almost ridiculous, yet it drew the entire look together. Wide brimmed, it must weigh a ton, with oodles of broad, sweeping black and white feathers attached to its top.

"Do you like this one, then?"

Edward's voice came as a surprise, and the breath rushed out of my lungs in a hurry, not for the first time this afternoon.

I actually stomped my foot slightly as I whirled to face him,

"You guys have _got_ to stop _doing_ that!" I gasped.

He chuckled quietly.

"Sorry about that."

I simply scowled and turned back to the costume.

"Yes, I like this one," I admitted after a few seconds of silence.

He reached past me and I watched as his graceful, tapered fingers ran lightly over the fabric.

"I can't recall precisely, but I believe this type of thing was in fashion about the time I was turned," he murmured.

His words came as such a shock that it took me several seconds to process them. When I did, I wasn't sure how I should respond. Edward very rarely spoke of his past, or what he could recall of it. This was, perhaps, the first time he'd actually initiated a conversation on the topic.

And for as long as I'd been waiting to discuss this with him, all I managed was a quiet, "Oh yeah?" I could have slapped myself for completely bumbling it.

He nodded slowly, a slight frown marring the skin between his brows, and I realized that I'd missed my opportunity. I only hoped it wouldn't be my last.

We continued to examine the costume in silence, before he spoke again.

"I knew you were there."

Well, he was certainly keeping me on my toes today. I was following these conversations about as well as if we speaking in another language.

"I'm sorry?" I asked.

"Yesterday morning? Outside of the kitchen. I knew that you were there."

He what?! He'd known that I was there? Why hadn't he revealed me to Carlisle? Why hadn't he just said things that he'd known I'd like to hear?

Edward held up his hand, as if to ward off my whirlwind of thoughts.

"I've been thinking, lately, Bella; about the things that you want, and the things that you've asked of me. About the things that you've been going through these past couple of months. And I realized that you're right."

I felt as though he'd dropped me into a bucket of ice water. Shock was setting in so swiftly that I could barely find the presence of mind to speak and I had a feeling that if I did manage, I'd barely be able to stutter out a few syllables so I kept my mouth shut.

Edward thought I was right. What about, I wondered.

"I am selfish. I would do anything for you, as long as I agreed with it," he confessed. I could only stare, wide eyed, as he continued to speak. "I want to blame it all on my nature, on what we are. And some of it is. I'm sorry if that's hard for you to accept, but it is. Yet, I know that some of it is simply me. Who I am. I want what's best for you. I've always wanted what's best for you. But I realized recently that perhaps I don't even know what the best thing for you _is_. When I stand nearly alone, with only Rosalie, of all people, as my ally, when others who I respect, and who I know love you, are arguing that you're making the right decision, well, perhaps I'm being blinded by my own prejudices, biased by my own experiences. And though the very thought drives me to near madness, despite my own emotions, perhaps _I_ am not the best thing for you. Perhaps there is someone out there who is better for you than I am. Perhaps that someone lives beneath our very roof?" He smiled, though it was impossible to miss the bitterness behind the expression. "I want to tell you that I never meant to be selfish, Bella. But I did. I couldn't... I _can't_ bear the thought of anything happening to you. And I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry that the compulsion that drives me makes it difficult for you to live your life."

I was completely and utterly speechless. These were words that I had never, _never_ thought to hear from Edward's mouth. What on Earth had happened to make him say such things?

"Jasper and I talked a bit, a couple of nights ago..."

I absently wondered if this supposed 'talking' included fists.

"...And I just..." He took a deep breath, as though there was more he wanted to say, but couldn't find the strength or will to do so. He abruptly changed topics, and I assumed that that was exactly the case. "So yesterday, when I heard your thoughts, and your heart, I didn't say anything, because I felt you had a right to know. There's very little the others keep from you, I know this, yet I've always worried that anything more than things you absolutely needed to know would... I don't know. Frighten you, maybe? Worry you? And that was wrong. You're stronger than that, so much stronger than I gave you credit for, and I can't continue to treat you like a child."

I was awestruck. By these sudden revelations, and the truth that was finally pouring out of Edward's mouth. It did not even occur to me to question the honesty behind his words, for it rang in each of them; it resonated in the steady bronze gaze that met mine unblinkingly.

I carefully laid my hand on his arm, smiling up at him tentatively.

"Thank you, Edward," I whispered.

The right corner of his mouth turned upward slightly in a crooked grin that I hadn't seen for a while, and I felt my spirits lift considerably.

"I will do everything I can to restrain myself, Bella, but please know that when it comes to you...it's difficult for me. I can't promise to be perfect."

Smiling wistfully, I grasped his wrist, towing him behind me as I headed in the direction from where I heard Alice's shrilly excited voice emanating. Glancing over my shoulder at him, I shook my head. "No one is, Edward. No one is."

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**A/N: Okay, so I'm sorry for those of you that don't like Edward, but I've got to redeem him if I'm going to turn this into the original three way relationship it was meant to be. Rest assured, he's not going to be a saint or anything. He's still Edward after all, he's just going to try and ease up...**

**We'll get a little more of his perspective in a mini-chapter, probably next.**

**Anyway, hit the button and let me know what you think. :)**


	28. Interlude : Love Serving Forty

**A/N: Hey guys. This one is a little short, but I think it provides some much needed perspective.**

**Let me know what you think.**

**~Ex**

* * *

Calefaction

Interlude 7

Love Serving Forty

"_Making a comeback is one of the most difficult things to do with dignity." – Greg Lake_

Edward PoV

"And we've got the cobwebs all set up, right? Jasper, please tell me that you did that last night, I mean, I give you guys the most simple tasks and you can't even--..."

I followed the small, motley group comprised of my siblings at what I hoped was a safe distance. With the Halloween party a mere day away (one of the worst ideas to date, I might add), Alice had abandoned the cheerful pixie façade and donned her general's cap; she was on the warpath. Emmett had nearly been assaulted this morning, when he'd stopped in to change clothes, by the frenetic ball of energy that Alice had become. Though he tried to deny it, I'd definitely seen fear in his eyes when Alice had jabbed her tiny index finger into his chest and demanded to know whether or not the mummy she'd tasked him with was complete. It wasn't, naturally; he'd been spending just a bit too much time at a certain human's house recently to really be expending much energy on Alice's party. I'd honestly feared we might need several members of the clergy and an ancient Latin exorcism text when Emmett had brushed our tiny sister off and told her to 'relax, it's just a party'.

Of course, I_ had _completed the short list of responsibilities Alice had demanded (there was no asking) I do, but with her current mind-set I didn't put it past her to turn on me and begin howling in that terrifying banshee shriek of hers. Frankly, I didn't think I'd be able to handle it diplomatically if Alice decided to gratuitously berate me for doing the things she'd asked.

It'd been a long week. Between my reckless altercation with Jasper, the resultant reprimand from Carlisle, and my admission to Bella, I was feeling rather... rather...

Well that was the problem, wasn't it? Despite the ease with which my acute vampire mind was able to sift through and process the thoughts of others, was able to aggressively scrutinize my surroundings down to every minor color gradient, it seemed to wither to an almost handicapped degree when it came to turning an impartial eye inward. It was far easier to assign blame for my emotions than to acknowledge that the situations causing them were of my own making. Or worse, to accept that some of said situations were completely out of my control. It seemed as though the wisdom I'd imparted to Bella last week was of the 'do as I say and not as I do' variety.

I was beginning to realize that a lot of my advice fell under that category.

I was angry. That much I was sure of. Despite my attempts to quell the seething animosity, I could hear the underlying bitter ring of it in every word I spoke, felt the hard edge it added to otherwise lighthearted smiles.

Now who I was angry with? Well, that was a rather gray area.

Jasper's was the name I instinctively wanted to flagrantly scrawl at the top of that list. I'd confided my feelings for Bella to him, and not only had he thrown them back in my face, refusing to believe their sincerity, but he'd seen fit to begin pursuing Bella himself. And yes, I _was_, without doubt, angry with him. But I knew, beneath the thick-skinned layers of denial, that I was even angrier with myself.

Where had the days gone when the biggest concerns of my day were the fleeting thoughts that Jasper might slip and Emmett might sneak a tiny Bella some chocolate?

When had I become the one to so eagerly relinquish culpability for my actions to our monstrous nature? I never thought that I would find myself riding the demon's coattails; using its existence as an excuse for my mistakes. Wasn't our ability to resist its constant demands what set us apart from the nomadic covens?

Thought it was a sour thought, I had to accept that, for the moment, I was the Cullen liability. I was the one that had, regrettably willingly, torn down the wall that separated human from demon so completely that I was unable to look at the young human we'd come to accept as family and see anything other than the red and blue veins that pulsed beneath the nearly translucent barrier of her fragile skin. If Bella hadn't projected her terrified memories of us upon me, if she hadn't looked up at me with those huge fawn eyes... would I have stopped?

Though my heart was still, it seemed to give a painful lurch in my chest.

It was easy now, when my mind wasn't clouded by bloodlust, to say yes. Of course, I'd have stopped. It was Bella.

But I'd knowingly given myself over to the monster's demands; allowed it more control than I ever had in my rage over Jasper's thoughts. I was not naïve enough to realize that were I not possessed of my particular gift, that haunting night would have ended with Bella's sweet blood damningly staining my lips.

Maybe Jasper was right. How could I proclaim to love her, when it was so rare that my decisions regarding her life had a positive impact?

Still, when I looked at her, there was... _something_ there. Every small quirk of her lips, whether her smile was wry or blissful, made warmth suffuse my chest. Whenever she peered at me with those eyes, those innocent umber eyes, something within me clamored to protect her from anything that would cause that gaze to become jaded. Her tears provoked a fury to rival the most violent of storms and her laughter made my gut tighten with need.

Jasper could refute my claim as strongly as he'd like, but he was wrong. I loved Bella. And thanks to the unwelcome images that Jasper's mind had forced upon me during our little fray, Bella's fury and disappointment with my intrusion, her acceptance of his... affection, he'd unwittingly prompted me to a realization that, though spoken many times, finally came crashing home.

I was effortlessly destroying not only everything I'd ever had with Bella, but any future we might have together as well. With every thoughtless, selfish act, every condescending word... I was pushing her further away, and it was only a matter of time before she was so far gone that there was no reaching her.

The despair that accompanied that idea was so painful that it nearly brought me to my knees.

And though I was able to admit what a difficult undertaking it would be, I knew that there were some serious changes to be made.

I'd started with 'The Apology'. The negativity that hung between Bella and I plagued me, and there was much that needed to be said if I ever hoped to clear the air. I'd rehearsed my words silently at least fifty times, but when I'd finally gathered the courage to approach Bella in the dusty silence of the costume shop, when she'd waited for my words so expectantly, watched me from beneath the soft fringe of her impossibly long lashes, my perfectly arranged script had vanished as though it'd never existed at all. I'd opened my mouth and out tumbled the most random array of incoherent sentiments I'd ever uttered. The longer I'd rambled on, the more inclined I'd been to be mortified, but Bella's mind assured me that I was doing the right thing; that this impromptu speech of contrition went miles further than a stilted, half-hearted apology would have. And I didn't regret it. Her tentative smile and pleasant surprise were balm for wounds that I'd too long refused to recognize I'd inflicted upon our relationship.

"So, you know her better than I do, how long is she going to be like this?"

The quietly curious words pulled me out of my own head, and I glanced to my left slightly, where a bemused-looking Bella was walking as silently as she could next to me.

"Hmm?" I questioned, discomfited to realize that, despite my preternatural senses, I'd managed to miss whatever it was we were talking about.

Bella nodded in front of us, where Alice continued to recite the elementary assignments that she'd given to Jasper, her normally melodic soprano growing more shrill by the moment. A wry grin tugged at my lips as his thoughts revealed a terse countdown that began at a million.

"Ahhh." I shrugged helplessly in response, shaking my head. "I couldn't say, really. Certainly once the guests begin to pile in she'll be back to her cheery self, but before that... I can't make any promises."

Bella laughed and it felt as though someone was shining a warm, brilliant light in my torso.

"How'd you manage to escape?" I questioned, simply because I wanted to hear her voice again.

She grinned coyly up at me, and I was briefly 'Dazzled' by her radiant beauty; the gentle rosy hue of her cheeks, and the excited sparkle in the soft mahogany depths of her eyes.

"I can't say," she whispered playfully, glancing at Alice, theatrically wide-eyed, and I realized that she didn't want Alice to overhear and perhaps force her back into conversation.

I rolled my eyes with a smile, focusing on the familiar voice of her mind with a nod. She immediately began to replay her escape, the hyperbole she used making me chuckle.

In her mind, she moved as silently as any vampire, perhaps even more so, tip-toeing in exaggerated steps. Beside her, Alice transformed from a sweetly smiling angel to a devilish creature with horns and a goatee. I snickered. Jasper was a morose looking matador, reluctantly waving a red cape to keep Alice's attention. Bella stealthily began to slow her steps until she was several feet behind our siblings, at which point she leapt in the air and somersaulted backward, landing beside me in a crouch.

I couldn't help but peer at her skeptically.

"Really?"

She nodded solemnly, pressing her lips together and looking ahead. "Oh yes. That's how it happened. Just like that."

I nodded slowly, the corners of my lips creeping upward.

"Not too bad, for a mortal."

She nudged me in the ribs, a sensation I barely registered, while my Bella promptly scowled and began to rub her offended elbow.

The past four days had been hellish. I had done everything within my supernatural power to keep from stifling Bella's humanity. A grueling, will-power testing task, let me say. _Four days_ and already I'd had to restrain myself on at least a dozen occasions. Like when Jasper had carefully situated her on the back of his bike, so that they could run one of Alice's inane errands. Or when Bella had ordered pizza for dinner three nights in a row. Or, God help me, when Alice, Bella and I had stayed late to work on a project and Alice had taunted Bella into racing her down a long, empty school corridor in her stocking feet. The imaginings this situation had prompted, nearly all of them ending Bella cracking her fragile skull open on the concrete tiles, would have given me heart palpitations had I been human.

Yet, I'd kept my mouth firmly shut, because these scenarios, whether or not I viewed them as dangerous or imprudent or simply suicidal, made Bella..._happy_.

She'd wrapped her arms trustingly around Jasper after he'd patted a helmet on her head, despite her protestations, and never once thought that he might let her fall. She'd gorged herself on the foul smelling cheese and bread combination, giggling gleefully over a cartoon sponge's antics. And though her heart had raced wildly and her arms had flailed, she'd been laughing with abandon while sliding swiftly over the polished floor.

I couldn't recall the last time I'd made her laugh, giggle, or smile with contentment.

I was sick to death of being the one that stood in the way of her happiness.

"Whatcha thinking about?" Bella suddenly questioned, her voice penetrating my thoughts.

I smiled, impulsively leaning down to kiss the tip of her nose.

"You," I answered honestly.

The warmth of her blush brushed my arm even as she grinned and looked away.

"Only good things, I hope," she replied lightly. Her mind revealed that she wasn't entirely teasing.

I took her warm hand in mine, giving it what I hoped was a friendly squeeze.

"Always," I assured her.

Her shy smile prompted a sudden, insistent urge to kiss her, and I leaned forward before I'd even realized that I was actually planning to follow through with the thought. Bella's breath stilled, and she stared up at me, wide-eyed, before the moment was promptly shattered by a frustrated cry.

"You guys! What are you doing back there?! Bella! We have to discuss food here, come on! Am I the only one taking this seriously?!"

Bella and I shared an exasperated sigh, before petulantly trudging toward Alice, who continued to speak as though she hadn't been interrupted at all.

It was impossible not to notice that the warmth of Bella's small hand remained in mine.

A low wave of hostility informed me that someone else had taken note.

I glanced up to find Jasper's less-than-friendly gaze upon me. Arching a brow, I simply smiled.

I may be behind by a few points, but the game was far from over.

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**A/N: Thanks for sticking with me, it means so much that people are still reading, even though my updates are less than reliable. And woo! More than 1700 reviews! You guys are the best. :)**


	29. Three's Company

**A/N: Chapter 22! Finally. And it's crazy long. Something like, 25 pages, 10k words. Bella PoV. Let me know what you think.**

**Also, the outline for this story predicts about 9-10 more chapters, so we'll see things moving along fairly quickly from here forward.**

**Annnnnd. I don't normally do this, but I came across two fics recently that I love so much, I want to rec them. **

**If you like Darkward, you should check out Hide and Drink by Savage7289.**

**And if you like crazy Bella, hate Jacob, and are a fan of vamps with an abundance of southern charm, please take a look at The Quiet Room by givemesomevamp.**

**They are both excellent works in progress that I wanted to share. **

**Thanks for all of the reviews to the last couple of chapters, I hope you enjoy this one.**

**~Ex**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 22

Three's Company

"Bella-a! Telephone!"

I glanced up in surprise as Esme's voice drifted up the stairs, drawing an irritable growl from Alice as the curler she was trying to set slipped out of her hands and landed with a thump on the floor.

"Bella!" she snapped irritably.

I scowled down at the abominable apparatus, feeling a bit of satisfaction that the torturous device now lay useless on the floor. I briefly imagined myself upturning the entire set of curlers in a fit of restless rage, laughing maniacally as they littered the soft carpet like so many tiny skeletons in a macabre hair product graveyard.

"Bella?" Esme prompted, pulling me out of my odd little fantasy. I glanced hopefully at Alice, who threw her hands up in defeat, obviously disgusted that I would rather speak on the phone than submit myself to her ministrations. After two hours and nearly ten attempted and just as quickly abandoned hair styles, there wasn't a lot I _wouldn't_ rather submit myself to at this point.

"Yeah, I got it!" I called in response, hopping up and stumbling just a bit as my legs and bottom numbly protested the complete lack of motion for the past several hours. Grumbling beneath my breath at Alice, who was whistling innocently and carefully arranging her army of styling products on my vanity, I rubbed my sleeping appendages, wincing as circulation was restored. I limped to the phone, mentally scanning the very short list of possible callers. It was either one of my siblings or my dad, both of which seemed unlikely, or Lys, which was even more doubtful. A telemarketer maybe? I frowned and picked up with a hesitant, "Hello?"

There was complete silence on the line; not even the sound of breathing came through the receiver to help me identify who might be on the other end. I glanced at Alice curiously. She was tapping her tiny manicured fingers in a steady rhythm against one of my bookshelves, supposedly perusing my fiction selection. Obviously there was no help forthcoming on that front.

"Hello?" I tried again.

"Bella," a melodic voice acknowledged wistfully.

The shock of hearing _that_ particular voice sped through my veins, causing my heart to falter slightly and my stomach to flutter with that odd butterfly-wing sensation. I pulled the phone away from ear, peering at it for a second in disbelief, before bringing it back and stuttering,

"R-Rose?"

"Hey Bella. How are you doing, sweetie?"

How was I doing? Rose had been gone for weeks, and she wanted to know how _I_ was doing? I shook my head, wide-eyed.

"Me? I'm... I'm fine. Good, even." My thoughts were clamoring around in my head; there was so much I wanted to tell her. About my date with Jasper, and the girl whose hair I'd pulled. About General Alice and her party, and Edward's recent change of heart. I wanted to tell her that I'd been feeling pretty good lately, and I wanted to tell her that Lys' parents had been killed by vampires. Despite all of those thoughts vying desperately to be the first to escape my mouth, there was one thing I wanted to say that trumped all of them. I wanted to know how _she_ was doing. "I mean... I think the more important question here is, how are _you_?"

She was quiet for so long that I thought she might not respond. Finally, there was a quiet breath.

"I'm... Better. Getting better, anyway... I think," she answered cautiously, and I felt relief sweep through me. It wasn't exactly an exuberant 'I'm great!', but it was a far cry from the emotion I'd seen on her face the day she'd left. Everyone had assured me, of course, that 'Rose is strong', and 'Rosalie will be alright', but I couldn't help but worry about her. I guess I just didn't see her the same way that the rest of my family did; as the independent, put-herself-first vampire. On some level, of course, I knew that she was spoiled, but really we all were, weren't we? With all the money, and the immortality... What my family wanted, they got; Alice was a prime example of that, and I certainly wasn't exempt. It wasn't like Rosalie was an exception. And yeah, she _could_ take care of herself, but maybe there were situations where she shouldn't have to. I was still angry that Emmett had gotten to stay at a time when I thought Rose could have used her family most.

She was more than just my older sister. Of course, Esme would always be 'mom', but Rosalie was right up there. She'd been there for me when I felt like there wasn't anyone else I could go to, and now... Now she was just gone.

"I miss you, Rose," I found myself suddenly whispering, eyes prickling. The last thing I wanted to do was make her feel bad about her choice to leave or force her to come home before she was ready, but I just had to tell her; it didn't seem like anyone else was going to. I rubbed away the tears that were gathering in my lashes. "I just..." Just what? Wanted to see her? Wanted her to come home and slap some sense into Emmett? "...Just wanted you to know," I finished, unwilling to verbalize my own selfish needs.

She laughed, a quiet, indulgent sound that brought me right back to my childhood. "I know, Bella. I miss you too." She paused for just a moment, before continuing, "And I'm sorry. For the way that I left, and the things that I said. Especially for the things that I said to you. I was just so angry, and I couldn't think of anything but...but them... I was out of line."

I dismissively waved her words away, though she couldn't see the gesture. I'd long since forgiven the harsh words that Rose had directed toward me that day. She'd lashed out; we were all guilty of it. At least she hadn't tried to kill me... "It's alright. I know you were going through a lot--"

"That doesn't excuse my behavior," she insisted.

"Well, you're forgiven, then," I adamantly replied.

And then there was silence, several awkward seconds of it filled with thoughts that neither of us were willing to voice.

"Hey, maybe Esme and Carlisle will let you come up and visit me in Denali. Tanya and her sisters are vegetarian, like the Cullens," Rose suddenly enthused.

A thrill of excitement chased away the tiny sliver of self-preservation that knew I should be uneasy at the prospect of an unknown vampire coven; I really wanted to see Rose. "Definitely. Maybe for a couple of days over Christmas break or something?"

"That'd be great. It'd be really nice to see you over the Holidays. And maybe Alice could come too?" If she was trying to hide the note of longing in her voice, she was failing miserably.

"I think I can convince her. She'll probably throw a fit over the lack of shopping options, but she'll just have to suck it up."

Alice made a tiny, disgruntled noise, but when I looked up, she was smiling.

"I'll talk to mom and dad, see what they think," I continued.

"Good. Good." There was another breath from her end. I was coming to associate the tiny noise with things that she didn't particularly want to say. "Bella. I just want you to know, it wasn't all Emmett."

I didn't immediately understand the words that signaled our abrupt change of topic.

"What?"

"Emmett and I... Our relationship and the end of it. It wasn't completely his fault."

Ohhh, well that certainly cleared things up. Rose was a crazy person. Why would it be the cheating liar's fault that their relationship had ended?

"What?" I repeated lamely.

"Don't get me wrong, what he's done... It's beyond reconciling. But I never meant for you to be torn between us, you shouldn't have to choose. Alice told me that you two are barely talking, and I don't want that to be because of me. I know you're upset, but he's still your big brother, and I know that he misses you nearly as much as I do. So just know, that even before he did...what he did, things weren't good between us, Bella. We put up a decent front for the family, but when it was just us... There was so much fighting. That's really all I can remember about the past couple of years; the constant fighting. We'd grown apart; we just didn't want to admit how far apart, to you guys or ourselves."

I listened in stunned silence as my sister admitted her marital problems to me. I'd never, _never_ suspected. Yeah, they fought, but it all seemed playful, and they'd always eagerly made up afterward. To hear her talking like this, to realize that Em and Rose had been serious when I'd seen them glare at one another, growling about petty nonsense, it was... Well it was eye-opening to be certain. Compounded with Emmett's frustration about the control he felt he'd ceded to Rose when he'd been changed, I could see how they might not be on the best of terms.

"I'm sorry if that shatters your childhood illusions of us," she remarked wryly, as though reading my mind. "But you're grown up now, Bella, and I think you deserve to know. Just because _I_ want to tear Emmett limb from limb, doesn't mean you have to. I just wish that he'd waited, that'd he'd sought other means, _any_ other means, to ending what we had."

"You deserved better," I agreed solemnly.

"I did," she murmured. "I can't claim to know how he feels about that girl, your friend--"

"She is _not_ my friend!" I hastily interjected.

Alice's eyes rolled skyward at my exclamation.

Rose, at least, seemed to understand the guilt that gnawed at me, for the part that I had played in all of this, and quickly corrected herself. "Right, sorry, the girl, then. I don't know how he honestly feels about her, but I hope he wasn't using her as a scapegoat. I know things were rough between us, more than rough, really, but if he was pretending to lo-- care for her...I guess she'd be just as much a victim as I am in all of this."

My stomach churned as I took in her words and the meaning behind them. Rose seemed almost desperate to pretend that the end was strictly due to the recent strain on her and Emmett's relationship; would rather give the girl that slept with her husband a way out, as long as it meant he hadn't fallen for someone else. She was willing to make him out to be a monster who'd taken advantage of an innocent human girl , rather than acknowledge that maybe things just hadn't worked out. She still loved him.

I knew I had to tell her, but I really didn't want to. Alice stepped forward and laid an encouraging hand on my shoulder, smiling sadly and nodding.

I took a deep, steadying breath. "Rose, there's something you should know. About Emmett... I think that he's pretty serious...about things with...you know... He, uh... He asked... He asked Carlisle to change her." The words came out in a rush, and I doubted that she'd have understood them without her unnaturally good hearing.

The silence that followed my proclamation was heavy; laden with the pain those words had undoubtedly inflicted. "I'm sorry," I added, the inane words feeling inadequate.

"Oh," she breathed, and my heart constricted painfully in my chest. "I guess, I didn't realize how serious he..." Her soft chuckle was bitter. "Well, I guess that's that, then."

"Rose... I'm sorry... I'm sorry I ever talked to her." Guilt slithered from my stomach, where it had sat like a stone for weeks, to wrap tightly around my heart. There were times, regardless of my dad's words, that I honestly wished Emmett had just finished this that very first day.

"Bella, no. You had no control over the decisions they made, and you hold no responsibility for their actions or the consequences. What's done is done."

I shook my head doubtfully, wiping futilely at my leaking eyes. "I guess," I hedged.

"In light of this, I do have something that I think I should probably tell you, though." She began hesitantly but ended on a slightly urgent note, and I found myself pressing my ear closer to the receiver.

"Alright." My mind raced with possibilities. She was never coming home. She and Emmett were getting divorced. She was going to kill Lys?

"Recently, a small nomadic coven was passing through the area, and Tanya invited them to stay with us for a while. They didn't subscribe to the same dietary choices as we do, but they were nice enough, certainly more civilized than most of the nomads."

Okay, not what I was expecting. My brow furrowed at this seemingly random story, but I remained silent, curious as to where she was going.

"There was one girl, Balinda, she and I kind of hit it off. We eventually got around to what had happened with Emmett and I, and she seemed to really understand. It was nice, to talk to someone who didn't know me, or us, or have any preconceived ideas about how we were supposed to be as a couple, you know?"

"Right..." Not that I wasn't happy that Rose was finding new friends, but her previous tone of voice had kind of suggested a bit more urgency than this particular account warranted.

"I mean, she was really sympathetic to my case, telling me how much she hated the girl that had ruined my relationship, and how Emmett should have to pay."

Before I could stop myself, I was blurting, "Rose, what are you trying to say?"

"When they left, Bella..." she whispered, almost brokenly. Fear crept up my spine coldly. "They said they were heading to Nova Scotia... But their trail... When I was out hunting, their trail, it led south. Balinda, she was a tracker, and I think--"

"Emmett, stop that!"

Lysandra's shriek cut through Rose's pained whisper, and I turned just in time to see a flash of red hair as she sped past my open door, Emmett on her heels.

"Watch out little human, or the big bad vampire's going to get you!" he shouted laughingly. I heard her giggles as they raced into the room that he used to share with Rose, slamming the door shut in their wake.

Hatred burned through me, causing my fingers to clench reflexively around the receiver. I whirled on Alice, wide-eyed.

"You invited them to the Halloween party?!"

Alice looked astonished that I even had to ask. "Bella, he's our brother!"

I growled beneath my breath as I angrily turned away from her. The phone in my hand had gone conspicuously silent.

"Rose? Hello?"

The 'off-the-hook' beep suddenly blared loudly in my ear and I jerked the phone away, punching the off button angrily.

"Dammit!" I hissed.

"What is it?" Alice's small hand landed delicately on my shoulder, and I shrugged her off. It was _her_ fault that Rose had hung up.

"Rose was telling me something... Something about a tracker? It sounded important, but we were _interrupted._"

"A tracker?" Alice echoed quietly, and I glanced at her, half expecting that familiar blank look that signaled a vision to come over her. She stared coherently back at me, still mumbling; more to herself, it seemed, than me. "Hm, I wonder if that was the tall brunette I saw headed this way. I'll have to call Rosalie later and verify, but if so, there's really nothing to worry about."

"You saw her coming here?" Panic was swift and merciless in its onset. "Why didn't you say something? Emmett could've been in trouble! Who knows what Rose told this girl?"

Alice simply shook her head, giving a tiny huff of exasperation. "Bella, do you really think I wouldn't have said something if there was trouble? This tracker, and her travelling companion, turned back a few days ago, probably because they realized how foolish they would have to be to show up here so outnumbered."

"Are you sure?"

I may not have been happy with Emmett at the moment, but the idea of anyone (other than me or Rose) hurting him made me feel sick to my stomach.

"I'm sure, Bella. I would never put a member of our family at risk with uncertainty."

I nodded as my racing heart began to slow.

"Now stop worrying, and get back over here, I'm not done with you yet."

I didn't bother arguing, trudging dejectedly back to my padded bench and slumping onto it.

Despite Alice's reassurances, my mind was preoccupied with Rose's almost warning.

Who was this Balinda?

And what did she want with Emmett?

* * *

By the time Alice had finished decorating me as surely as she'd decorated the house, people were already starting to arrive. Laughter, music and the din of steady chatter drifted up into the bedroom, where all thought of Rose's cryptic story had been pushed out of my head by my sudden, overwhelming nervousness.

"You look great," Alice assured me for the tenth time, as I stood, unmoving, in front of the mirror, trying to gather enough courage to join my siblings and classmates.

I nodded slowly. The costume I'd chosen was tailored perfectly for me and Alice had tossed in a few accessories; a cameo neckpiece that was probably really from around the early 1900s, a small pair of antique pearl earrings, and a pair of black boots that pinched my toes, but had a low enough heel that I didn't complain. She'd given me only a light dusting of makeup, though I _had_ been cajoled into some enormously fake eyelashes. My hair was curled into tight ringlets that she'd pinned to my head, letting only a few soft strands haphazardly escape. The giant hat perched precariously atop my head, easily weighing as much as I'd suspected, and Alice had carefully pinned it into place.

I didn't really look like me. But I looked good.

With that final self-confirmation, I tore my eyes away from the mirror, frowning thoughtfully as I realized that I'd monopolized all of Alice's pre-party time and she was still dressed in her jeans.

"What about you?"

She waved off my concern with a little smirk. "Vampire speed, remember? I'll be down in a few minutes."

"Of course," I chuckled.

She smiled giddily at me, taking my hands and giving them a slight squeeze. Her eyes were practically sparkling with excitement. It was a shame that Alice wasn't allowed to be more social, this really seemed to be her thing.

"Ready?" she asked, turning and tugging me toward the door before I had a chance to even respond. She froze in the frame, uttering a small gasp at whatever she saw in the hallway. I leaned over her shoulder curiously.

Emmett and Lys were standing just outside his room, pinned in place by the weight of Alice's stare. Lys actually looked a bit frightened. I realized why as Alice opened her mouth.

"_That_ is _not_ the costume I picked out for you guys!"

I smiled with satisfaction, crossing my arms as I leaned back against the door. This ought to be interesting.

Lys and Emmett were wearing matching costumes, of course. They appeared to be... Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf. My lips quirked against my will. I may hate them, but even I could admit that they'd chosen well.

Lys's red dress was of a conservative length, probably at Emmett's request, and laced over a white peasant blouse. Her red velvet cape fluttered around her ankles, the hood pulled up over her hair, in two curly pigtails that rested on her shoulders. The small wicker basket she held, decorated with bows that matched those on her white ankle socks, was filled with candy. Her red Mary-Jane platforms gave her a couple inches, but Wolf Emmett still towered over her.

My wayward brother's costume was so very him. Rather than going for the scary wolf look, which would have been easy considering his size, he'd donned a hairy gray jumpsuit, over which, he wore what looked to be a flower-patterned muumuu. A sleeping cap of the same fabric covered his head, from which two hairy ears were sticking out. His face was painted gray, a pair of gold-framed glasses perched on the tip of his nose and he'd glued whiskers to his cheeks.

Did wolves have whiskers?

I didn't get a chance to ask as Emmett defended this sudden change of plans.

"Alice, I couldn't wear those tights! Little Em was all out there! For everyone to see!"

I had to bite back laughter, even as a blush warmed my cheeks. Oh Emmett...

"Emmett!" Lys hissed, slapping at his arm and promptly cursing and rubbing the undoubtedly injured appendage.

"I don't care, Emmett! You agreed to what I picked out! Peter Pan and Wendy! I paid a fortune to have a Peter Pan costume tailored in your size!"

I almost hoped Alice would win this so that I could see Emmett in said costume. Graceful as he was, I didn't quite see him as a Peter Pan. I wondered if there would be glitter involved...

"I'll pay you back Alice, but I'm _not_ wearing that. You never said anything about tights!"

I saw Alice's jaw clench, before took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose.

The Cullens had to be the only vampires on Earth to experience stress over these random, domestic things. I lightly touched her shoulder.

"It'll be alright, Al. No one will even notice those two with our awesome costumes. Just, go get ready, and come down and enjoy the party you worked so hard on. Okay?"

She closed her eyes for a second, her frown wavering until she was smiling brilliantly once more. "You're right, Bella. Thanks." She brushed a kiss to my forehead before disappearing into her room, shooting a glare at Emmett's back on her way.

As soon as her door clicked shut, Emmett turned a big smile on me, dimples and all. "Whew, thanks Bells. For a sec I thought she was going to castrate me just so I wouldn't have an excuse not to wear the tights."

It was hard, not laughing, but I managed. I arched a brow, pressing my lips together and pointedly ignoring the curious looks of my ex-friend. "I didn't do it for _you_, Emmett. I did it for Alice. She worked way too hard on this to have your inconsiderate behavior ruin it."

He didn't flinch, and his smile never faltered. Emmett just chuckled, shook his head and hoisted Lys up and over his shoulder, despite her adamant protests. He tugged at one of my curls as he passed, muttering jovially, "_Tights_, Bells."

I waited until I was sure they were gone before I allowed myself a small smile.

I stood at the top of the stairs, listening to the growing crowd welcome Emmett and Lys into their ranks. Emmett made an inappropriate joke, everyone laughed, and someone turned the music up.

The prospect of heading down there, alone, was a fairly nerve-wracking one.

Would anyone notice if I were to slink back into my room and hide out for the rest of the night?

"Alice most assuredly would."

For a second I thought that my subconscious had taken on Edward's voice, until a cool hand landed on the small of my back.

I uttered a quiet gasp, hand flying to my chest as my heart thumped wildly. I turned to chastise him. I mean, how many times had I asked him not to _do_ that, but the words died in my throat.

I stared. And I stared. I might have even stared some more.

He looked...

Wow.

The catty whispers of my classmates suddenly made so much sense. It'd never escaped my notice that Edward was attractive; he was a vampire, they were all ridiculously beautiful. But I'd never really understood the lingering anger of the girls who Edward wouldn't give the time of day. I'd always wanted to tell them to get over it; that it was much better for the sake of their mortality that he wasn't interested.

But now... Well...

Well. It seemed like the most rational thing in the world to obsess over a lethal vampire that had absolutely zero interest in you.

I gave him a once over, noting the amused smirk, but unable to help myself.

He was dressed as... A newsie.

Now, under normal circumstances, dealing with your average seventeen year old guy, this costume choice could have been a colossal mistake. With the pantaloon-like pants and the jaunty cap it was all too easy to look absolutely ridiculous.

Not so with Edward. How he managed to pull this off, looking like he'd stepped out of a retro clothing ad, was beyond me.

A gray shirt, long sleeved cotton, clung to his torso like he'd painted it on, the lean lines of muscle clearly visible through the fabric. The few buttons at the neckline were undone, revealing a small expanse of smooth, pale skin, and the sleeves were pushed up. I forced my eyes to continue on. A pair of black suspenders rested neatly over his shoulders, clasped to the waist of a pair of slate gray short-pants. Black socks covered what should have been his exposed calves, and his boots looked remarkably like my own. A stack of newspapers were clutched under his arm.

And of course, nestled atop the unruly shock of his auburn hair was the infamous newsie cap. He had it pulled down just slightly, casting his handsome face into faint shadow. The soft gold pools of his eyes peered out, seeing far too easily the effect that his appearance was having on me.

I cleared my throat and leaned back into my room to grab the black parasol I'd left laying on my bed. Anything to stop myself from staring like one of the half-wit girls in my class.

"I like your costume," I sniffed primly, resting the recently acquired accessory over my shoulder.

He nodded, the corners of his lips tugging upward in a heart-stopping crooked grin that fit his costume far too well.

"I like yours, as well. May I escort you downstairs?"

Though I was glad he'd refrained from teasing me about my thoughts, that knowing smile was nearly just as bad. Tipping my nose in the air, I shook my head.

"I'm sorry, but I simply can't associate with the likes of you."

I slanted him a glance to find him smiling.

"Right you are, Miss. My apologies." He bowed exaggeratedly, sweeping the hat from his head.

I giggled under my breath and headed down the stairs, Edward trailing behind.

"I still don't approve of this," he muttered as we neared the landing, his eyes scanning the crowded room.

Laughing, I shook my head. "I think it's a little late to be voicing your concerns."

He grumbled beneath his breath and plopped his hat back on his head just as we entered the crush of bodies.

I peered around avidly; Alice had really outdone herself this time.

It looked as much like a decrepit, haunted house as an immaculate home owned by neat vampires could. Cobwebs were stretched in every nook and cranny, plastic and rubber spiders clinging to the strands as they peered eerily out with their beady eyes. Several fog machines gave the room just enough haze to obscure everything eerily. All of the furniture had been moved to the attic, with the exception of dozens of black and red folding chairs that Alice and I had painted. Life-sized mannequins and papier-mâché statues dressed as every conceivable horror movie monster were littered around the downstairs rooms; Emmett had even rigged a witch on a broom to fly above the heads of the people on the dance floor. Refreshment tables were lined with more candy, cupcakes and hors d'oeuvres than even this many people could eat.

It looked great.

As we made our way through the crowd, waving at Esme and Carlisle (Frankenstein and his bride), I couldn't help but be amazed at how many people had actually shown up. We definitely weren't the most popular students in the school, but it appeared as though the entire student body was here.

"Curiosity," Edward murmured near my ear, and I desperately repressed the shiver that wanted to race up my spine. "They fear us, envy us, but they still want us to like them. Quite the paradox."

I peered over my shoulder with a smile, "Not very newsie-like talk, there."

He chuckled and led me to the dance floor Alice had set up. A DJ was playing the corny Halloween music that could be heard in most malls across the nation from October 1st on. I recognized a few of our classmates, laughing and dancing. Emmett was telling a story to several people, his bear paw hands gesturing wildly while Lys stared at him like he was her own personal sun.

Was this what it was like to be normal?

Edward suddenly tossed his stack of newspapers onto one of the folding chairs, extending his hand to me with the patented Edward grin. "May I have this dance?"

I glanced at his hand as though it was something that had crawled out from under a rock, a look I'd seen Rose use on numerous occasions, before sighing heavily. I set my parasol against the same chair he'd used, and slid my glove-covered fingers into his. "I _guess_ that one dance won't hurt my reputation too terribly."

He laughed and pulled me closer to the solid wall of his chest. "We'll see about that." Guiding me around the dance floor with practiced ease, he simply lifted me from my feet when his complicated movements got to be too much for my coordination, or lack thereof. He swung me around and around, righting me just before my hat was about to topple from my head. By the closing of the song, I was breathless with laughter.

"Who'd have thought that grumpy old Edward was capable of such fun?" I teased, panting as Edward led us off the floor.

He didn't reply, and for a moment I was worried that I'd offended him, he was staring at me so intently. I tipped my head to the side curiously. "What?"

"You're beautiful when you're laughing," he murmured thoughtfully.

I blushed furiously at the unwarranted compliment, shaking my head. "Stop that."

His smirk didn't make any guarantees.

Tiny beads of sweat slid down the back of my neck, disappearing into the fabric of my dress, and I realized how thirsty I was. Peeling off my gloves, knowing Alice would be horrified by my defection, I gestured to the refreshment tables. "I'll be right back, alright? Just going to grab a drink."

He nodded his ascent, watching the crowd as he slipped into one of the chairs.

I picked my way back through the crowd, stopping in front of the long table that held five enormous punch bowls. They were labeled with corny titles, like 'Zombie Pus' and 'Vampire Blood', but I knew that they were mostly ginger ale, soda and fruit juices. I grabbed a cup out of the purple bowl, 'Liquefied Intestines' swallowing the entire glass quickly, before helping myself to another.

"Great party!"

I glanced away from the chattering crowd to see a cute guy standing next to me. He was dressed as Zorro, despite his bright blonde hair and the baby face that probably hadn't seen a single hair other than the moustache pasted above his lip.

Still, I found myself smiling, raising my voice to be heard above the music. "Thanks! I can't really take the credit; my sister Alice was the master mind behind all of this, but I'll let her know."

God, was I giving off as many socially inept vibes as it felt like I was?

To his credit, he just chuckled. "Bella, right?"

I nodded, extending my hand. It was still okay to shake hands, right?

"Yeah, Bella Cullen. And you're...?"

He took my hand into the warmth of his. It felt odd; his body heat. I pulled away as quickly as I could without seeming rude. "Mike. Mike Newton. I think we have biology together?"

So that's where I recognized that cheerful smile and bright blue eyes from. I felt a little bad that I didn't identify him sooner, though he obviously knew of me, but I'd been out for a couple weeks, so I was probably entitled to the lapse. "That's right! Mr. Banner, third period!"

"Yup."

The inevitable awkward lull in conversation was cut thankfully short as Mike was called over by a couple of friends. He winked at me from behind his black mask, tossing his plastic punch cup in the trash as he turned.

"Nice meeting you, Bella."

"You too, Mike." I waved as he crossed the room, where his friends began talking animatedly.

"Mike Newton, huh? You've got your sights set high, captain of the football team, varsity basketball..." A new voice drawled amusedly from my elbow. I recognized this one.

"Oh shut it, Jazz. He was just being friendly."

"We'll see," he replied noncommittally.

I shot him a glare, feeling my jaw drop for the second time that night.

I looked him over twice, just to be sure I was seeing things correctly. And promptly burst into laughter. Side-splitting, overwhelming laughter. I was positive that this was not on the Alice 'approved costume' list.

"What the hell are you supposed to be?" I gasped from between giggles.

He looked affronted by my reaction.

"I am a cowboy, obviously."

He was wearing a pair of old jeans, some scuffed cowboy boots, a white t-shirt (it did look good on him, but wasn't really costume material) and a well-worn cowboy hat. Not particularly funny, but the prop he held in his right hand... It was a home-made hobby horse; complete with yarn hair and big googly eyes that rolled about wildly each time he moved its stick body.

I pointed to it, trying to hold back the unceasing laughter. "And that?"

He pulled it against his side with a smile. "My trusty steed."

His words incited another round of giggles.

"Of course. Of course, it is. Has Alice seen your... uh choice?"

"I don't need Alice's permission to wear what I want. I've got a hundred years on her and frankly it's insulting that-- Hell, is that her?" Before I could blink, Jasper had disappeared into the crowd, leaving me laughing at the punch bowls.

He was right though; Alice _was_ making her grand entrance.

My smile threatened to split my face as I caught my first glimpse.

Her costume was perfect.

She was dressed as a nymph, or maybe a pixie of some sort, and I wondered if perhaps in a past life that wasn't exactly what she was.

She'd added extensions to her hair, so that it hung in a silken fall down the length of her back; tiny gold and green gemstones shining from the ebony tresses. Her makeup was amazing. I wasn't certain how she'd even managed it. Covering her left eye was a delicately drawn on maple leaf, shimmering with deep green hues and lined in gold. Long gold-tipped lashes fluttered against her cheeks as she blinked, smiling brilliantly as she stood on the steps and beheld the fruits of her labor. Her lips were painted a pale brown.

Her dress looked as though it'd been fashioned from materials she'd found in the woods; all soft browns and brilliant greens. The material thinned, so that it was sheer over her mid-section, revealing more intricate painting across her abdomen; sweeping tree branches and sparkling leaves. Tiny gemstones glittered from the material, as though she was covered in a fine sheen of dew. On her feet she wore a small pair of golden sandals, her legs sporting even more of the artistry shared by her face and torso.

But the most amazing aspect of her costume...was her wings.

Not overly large, they were still of an impressive size; made of some sort of sheer, glittering material. Hundreds and hundreds of shining baubles dotted the fabric; no wonder she'd been concerned it wouldn't be completed in time.

"Alice!" I called, waving and rushing over.

She laughed gleefully, jumping down the final few stairs to throw her arms around me.

"This was my best idea to date!" she exclaimed.

I grinned and hugged her tightly, her mood infectious.

"I can't deny, I was worried at first, but this is great!"

"Have you seen the others?"

I assumed she meant the rest of the family.

"Yeah, Edward and Em are over by the dance floor, last I saw mom and dad were greeting people by the door, and Jasper..." I gestured vaguely, not wanting to ruin Alice's excitement by pointing out Jasper and his costume. "He's around."

She gave a little squeal, grasping my hands and spinning me around once, before slipping in to mingle with the crowd.

I stood there for a moment, a wonderfully full sensation filling my chest. I heard Carlisle and Esme's laughter somewhere to my right; Jasper was artfully dodging Alice amidst the crowd, and Emmett's boisterous voice echoed whenever there was a lull in the music. It'd been a long time since I felt this content. It wasn't perfect, we were still missing Rose, but she'd be back. I knew she would. Maybe she'd find someone new, someone more mature than Emmett, to make her smile again.

I could feel my grin growing a little goofy, but I didn't care. Hugging my arms to my chest lightly for a second, I headed back toward the dance floor, where the DJ was leading a rousing round of the Monster Mash, and Edward.

He'd been different, lately.

Better.

He was still Edward, no doubt about that. He was the realist that felt the need to keep our feet on the ground when we let our heads get just a bit too far in the clouds. But he was living up to his promise; that he would try not to take things to the extreme. And I was grateful. Things had been too crazy lately to have to worry about Edward's oversensitivity as well.

I approached the chair where I'd left him, only to find it empty. My parasol and his papers were still sitting there, but he was nowhere to be found. I glanced around the dance floor, though I found it difficult to believe he'd be willingly dancing with anyone. My assessment was correct, he wasn't there. I peered at Emmett, thinking that he might have joined the small group gathered there.

Again, he was conspicuously absent.

It wasn't like he needed refreshment or the restroom, so where could he be?

Several minutes passed, and I suddenly realized something else.

Lys was gone too.

I hadn't seen her move from Emmett's side once tonight, and now she just happened to have disappeared at the same moment as Edward? It just seemed like too big of a coincidence, all things considered.

A tiny frisson of fear condensed in my stomach, my heart giving a flutter as I quickly pushed through the crowd, wracking my brain for where they could be. All of the downstairs rooms were open to the party, leaving only the upstairs, the basement, and the back yard as viable options.

I grabbed Emmett's arm in passing.

"Come here," I demanded tersely.

Emmett followed without question.

"What's up?"

"Where's Lys?" I snapped, feeling irritable that he could have even let this happen. Wasn't he supposed to be her big, bad ass protector? He _knew_ that Edward was suspicious of her.

"Oh, uh. She and Edward were dancing, they're probably over... Uh... I mean, maybe she's getting a drink or..."

Both of my brows rose.

"Yes?"

"Shit," he growled.

"Yeah!" I agreed. "Can you like..." I lowered my voice. "Smell her, or anything? Her scent? His?"

He shook his head, eyes growing slightly wild as he looked around. "There's too many people. I'm going to kill him..."

"Stop. Focus. We need to find them. He's probably not going to hurt her." I hoped I wasn't lying. "But you knew he wanted to 'talk' to her. Where would he take her? Where would you take someone to interrogate them?"

His big hand closed over my arm immediately and he pulled me toward the kitchen, where the door to the basement was. It made sense, they wouldn't be heard by neighbors, and it was unlikely for anyone to be stumbling down there, since there were no bathrooms or anything.

When Emmett tried the knob, it was locked.

"Fuck!"

"Break it off!" I exclaimed in exasperation.

"Witnesses..."

"Jesus, Emmett. Do it discreetly!"

He nodded, and we both leaned toward the door, blocking it from view as he wrenched the doorknob off.

I yanked the door open and hit the stairs running. I could hear their voices immediately.

"Listen, Edward. I know you care about Bella--..."

"I love her," he retorted brusquely. My cheeks warmed at the comment, though I didn't know why.

"Okay, you love her. I understand that. And I'm sorry that there's something wrong with her. But bullying me? Yeah, it's not going to solve anything, because I don't have the answers you're looking for. I wish I did, alright?"

Emmett and I descended the stairs, and I quickly skidded around the corner to find Lys leaning against the damp brick wall, Edward pacing in front of her like a caged lion.

"What about your grandmother?"

"What about her? She's a frail old lady with a baking addiction. She's not capable..."

"People are generally much more capable of evil than we credit them for," he interrupted coldly.

"Edward, seriously, I don't think--"

He sprung at her in a fluid motion, slamming his hands on either side of her head, causing her to utter a quiet shriek as he effectively caged her in. Emmett snarled and leapt forward.

"Why wouldn't she be capable, naïve human? Because she enjoys seeing her grandchild traipse about with a vampire?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" she argued, spine stiffening.

"Edward, no!" Emmett growled, but it was too late.

It was like watching a car wreck. Horrifying, yet with morbid interest, you find yourself unable to look away.

"Your parents were killed by vampires," Edward murmured softly, very close to her face, before stepping away.

I thought I might be sick; the expression on her face was... It was too much. God help me, I hated her, but no one deserved to hear this...

"Edward!" I gasped.

"Wh...What..." Lys' chest had begun to rise and fall very quickly, her face ashen beneath the rosy cheeked makeup she wore. "What are you talking about? No! No! You're wrong, they were camping...and the bears... Why would you... Why would you say that?!" Even from the distance at which I stood, I could see her begin to tremble.

"Jasper looked at the coroner's photos, while we were doing some investigating. It's quite the coincidence that you move in, parents murdered by our kind, and Bella suddenly falls ill."

"Vampires... My parents..." She echoed, apparently unable to process anything other than that. I stepped forward, feeling as though I should do _something_.

Emmett beat me to it. A single swipe of his hand sent Edward flying backward, where he landed in a neat crouch. His small smirk of satisfaction made my blood boil. Emmett took Lys by the shoulders, looking down at her, his face a mask of concern.

"Are you alright?"

She was staring at him as though she didn't know him. And maybe she was realizing that she didn't, not really. Her expression so closely mirrored how I'd felt after Edward had attacked me. It was the realization that the civilized façade was exactly that; that there was a much darker side than she could have possibly imagined.

Lys stared at the floor, still on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Did you know?" she whispered brokenly. I didn't see any tears, but I knew they weren't far off.

"Red, please," he murmured.

"Did you know?!" she suddenly demanded, jerking away from him with a shudder.

I glanced at Edward, who was staring at me quietly.

_I can't believe what you've done, _I thought balefully.

He glanced away.

"Yes, I knew," Emmett finally confessed.

Lys closed her eyes tightly, pressing her small fists against them, as though she could take it all away just by pretending it didn't exist. I understood that feeling all too well.

"But I only just found out, you have to belie--" He reached for her.

"Don't touch me!" she yelled, flinching away.

"Red..."

"I have to leave," she murmured, though her feet didn't move.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Emmett murmured mournfully.

"I have to leave." And like an Olympic sprinter, she was off, dashing for the stairs as though staying in this house for even another minute would kill her.

Perhaps it would have.

Emmett rounded on Edward, his gaze midnight black. I'd never seen the expression on his face; never. I stumbled toward Edward, terrified that Emmett might actually hurt him.

"What have you done?" he snarled softly, the words rumbling from deep within his chest.

"I did what I had to do to protect this family," Edward responded icily, suddenly grasping my shoulders and pushing me behind him. "Which is more than I can say for you."

"If I've lost her because of this..." He stopped, his face contorting with pain, before uncoiling swiftly, his hands suddenly fisted in Edward's shirt. Even in his grandma wolf costume, he was incredibly intimidating. "I will kill you, Edward."

Edward didn't so much as flinch. "Despite what you think, she deserved to know. Even if she has nothing to do with this, she had a right to know."

Emmett laughed incredulously. "And you just happened to think this was a good time to tell her?" He suddenly shook Edward. "This isn't over, _Eddie_." He released Edward roughly, racing up the stairs.

My heart thudded wildly in my chest, my pulse loud in my ears. So much for my sudden happiness.

"Are you okay, Bella?" Edward turned, looking me over with concerned eyes.

I quickly snapped out of my fear-induced paralysis.

"What were you thinking?!" I asked sharply, stepping forward and shoving at his chest. He didn't move.

"I didn't think she was being honest, and frankly, I didn't think it was right that Emmett was keeping that from her."

I scoffed. "Bullshit, Edward. You hoped it would encourage her to tell you if she knew anything. And as you can see, it didn't."

He frowned. "Why do you care so much? You hate her, remember? You don't want them to be together. I've just done you a favor."

"You haven't done _anyone_ any favors here. No, I don't want them together. But I didn't want them to end like that. Emmett was supposed to realize that no one could compare to Rose! Lys wasn't supposed to have a mental breakdown!"

He shrugged, and I felt my fury grow hotter.

"Don't act so nonchalant! You shouldn't have done that! Ugh! The ends justify the means, isn't that it? That's how it always is with you! It's not right!"

"Alright!" He held up his hands to ward off my verbal attack. "I'm sorry. You're right. I may have used a rather heavy hand... I'll apologize to Emmett."

"It's too late! Sometimes the things you say have irreversible effects. God, how many years have you lived and you haven't figured that out yet?!"

I felt my cheeks warm, undoubtedly red from my outburst. Closing my eyes, trying to calm myself, a wave of disorientation washed over me, as though all the blood was simultaneously attempting to drain yet fill my head. I swayed woozily, opening my eyes, watching the room blur slightly.

"Bella?! Bella!"

Strong arms caught me as I slumped toward the floor, chest tight. The weight of my ridiculous hat finally toppled from my head, and I heard the feathers whisper over the concrete floor.

"Bella, answer me!" Edward demanded, fear in his voice.

I focused on the sound, following it out of the darkness that threatened to consume me. Swallowing convulsively, I lifted my head off his arm.

"I'm... I'm alright," I breathed, watching the room come back into focus. "Just... Got over excited or something."

Edward was glaring at the stairs, and I knew what he was thinking. He upsets Lys, and I just happen to have a fainting spell. It _was_ odd, but I didn't believe his suspicions. The first few times this had happened, I didn't even _know_ the girl.

"Over excited. Yes, I'm sure that's it," he replied sarcastically.

* * *

It'd taken ten minutes, but I'd finally convinced Edward to let me walk back upstairs on my own; the idea of everyone making a fuss, or worse, mom and dad sending everyone home when the party was just really getting started, was not appealing in the slightest. He guided me upstairs with a hand on my back, as though I wasn't capable of walking without his help, and I shook him off in irritation, running up the last few steps on my own.

Alice had pinned my hat back into place without asking too many questions, probably because she already knew the answers, though Jasper was currently seated beside me, badgering me for information.

"How you feelin'?" The backs of his knuckles grazed my cheek, and I blushed as I realized I immediately tipped my head into the touch. I straightened up quickly.

"Fine. Better. It was nothing to worry about. Just the excitement or something."

Jasper nodded slowly, taking me at my word. "So, Edward told her, huh?"

I sighed quietly, allowing the calm he exuded to wash over me, lest I get too worked up.

"Yep. It really wasn't his place."

"I'm sure he had good intent..." My eyebrows shot up, and I looked at him. "Nope, never mind. You're right."

I nodded. "It's a shame, I was having a really good time."

Jasper chuckled. "Darlin', the night's hardly over."

"I know, I'm just preoccupied with Emmett... He was so upset." Where was he now? Was he trying to patch things up with her? Was he plotting ways to get even with Edward?

"Emmett's a big boy, Bella, he'll be alright. Guess he's getting a taste of his own medicine, huh?"

I frowned. I'd thought that's what I wanted... For the two of them to feel the pain that Rose had, but really, I suppose I just wished we could go back to a time when no one had to feel that way at all.

"Don't frown, Darlin'. C'mere." He stood, tugging at my hand. I sluggishly followed his lead, reluctantly allowing him to lead me toward our dancing classmates. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling my back against his chest as he leaned in, brushing his lips to my ear. I shivered lightly at the contact. "I'm sure I could take your mind off of Em's problems..." he murmured, his breath cool as it dusted my skin. I pulled my lower lip between my teeth, biting back the tiny sounds that were building in my throat. I glanced over my shoulder, into the molten gold pools of Jasper's eyes. He smiled lazily and something in my stomach tightened.

"Alright," I whispered.

He chuckled, nodding firmly, before spinning me to face him. He led my arms to his shoulders, and I clasped my hands around his neck, toying with the ends of his hair that stuck out from his hat. He made a small noise of approval, something that sounded suspiciously like a purr, and I found my absentee smile making a reappearance.

Jasper led me easily around the floor, letting me tromp clumsily on his feet; I was suddenly reminded of the dream I'd had several weeks ago. The dancing...Jasper allowing me to make mistakes, Edward carrying me. And their request that I choose...

"Whatcha thinking about? The frown is back."

I smiled, shaking my head. "Nothing. Just a stupid dream I had."

He nodded, not pressing me for more information.

Jasper encouraged me to dance with nearly everyone on the dance floor. I passed through tens of arms, including a couple dances with the very sweet Mike Newton. Of course, they were incredibly short dances, as, much to my amusement, Jasper had cut in all three times I'd danced with him. Alice was a riot on the dance floor, break-dancing and getting into ridiculous 'dance-offs' with several people.

As the night began to wind down, the DJ played a couple of slower songs, and I found myself in Jasper's arms for nearly all of them. I liked it there. Probably too much. And of course, I inevitably found myself thinking of the one other time I'd danced with him. The dancing that had led to kissing, which had led to his car...and...Yeah...

I had a feeling that he knew whenever I'd think of it. He'd smirk just a little, and give me a wink that made my heart stutter. It was criminal how easily he could wreak havoc on my senses.

The dance floor was getting crowded when the quiet strains of a familiar song played over the speakers, and a cool hand came to rest on my shoulder. A glance showed Edward, watching Jasper pensively.

"Can I cut in?"

I stiffened slightly. I really wasn't at the forgiveness portion of our argument yet. Jasper must have felt it, because he drew me closer, shaking his head.

"'Fraid not."

A muscle ticked in Edward's jaw.

"Bella, I just wanted to talk to you. To apologize."

I stared at him, my face emotionless. "So, apologize."

He sighed. "Please?"

I frowned, disengaging myself from the comfort of Jasper's grasp to turn, allowing Edward's arms to encompass me.

"Fine," I said on a long-suffering sigh.

His arms tightened, and I rested my fingers on the soft cotton of his shirt. I felt Jasper at my back.

"I'm sorry if I upset you tonight. I'm trying, I swear I am. Just...the thought of anyone, of anything hurting you...I can't even think straight."

It was an excuse I'd heard hundreds of times. "I know, Edward."

"I didn't mean to hurt Emmett. I didn't think out the repercussions of my actions."

"No, you didn't," I chastised quietly, as we began to sway to the song. I slid my hands up to the cool skin of Edward's neck.

"I'm sorry. And I will apologize to Emmett. And Lysandra."

I nodded. "Damn right you will."

He chuckled, leaning forward suddenly to kiss the tip of my nose. Maybe I wasn't so far off from that forgiveness phase, after all. Why was it so tough for me to stay mad at him?

Near my ear, I heard a soft growl, and I glanced over my shoulder, startled to see Jasper still close.

He rested his hands on my hips suddenly, just beneath Edward's, tugging me back slightly. I followed his lead, though Edward stepped closer, until I was nearly sandwiched between the two of them.

"You guys," I squeaked in protest. This was bringing some seriously inappropriate memories to the forefront of my mind; memories that Edward did _not_ need to see.

He peered at me curiously, and I quickly began mentally singing along to the song playing.

_The how, I can't recall. Now I'm staring at what once was the wall, that separated east and west, and now they meet amidst the broad daylight._

Edward laughed lightly, sliding his hands up to my waist, and I realized I was pretty much dancing with the both of them. It was odd, and I glanced around nervously, worried what people might think, but it was so crowded, no one was even looking our way.

I relaxed slightly, with the comforting presence of Jasper at my back, and the crookedly smiling face of Edward before me.

Jasper reached up, gently tugging my hat from my head and tossing it onto a nearby chair with athletic precision. His arm came around my hips, anchoring me to him as he reached up and ran long fingers through my neatly pinned locks, causing my hair to tumble down around us in soft curls, bobby pins scattering to the floor. Edward tucked several of the strands behind my ear.

I tipped my head back onto Jasper's shoulder, fiddling with the hair at the nape of Edward's neck, eyes closed.

Why weren't they fighting? Why didn't Jasper take me away from Edward or vice versa?

I glanced up into Edward's loving gaze, peering over my shoulder into the heated depths of Jasper's...

_And who's to say it's wrong. And who's to say that it's not right? Where we should be for now..._

What was I doing...?

Carlisle's words echoed in my head, "..._vampires tend to be very possessive and jealous... You mustn't lead them both on."_

Something lurched in my stomach, an emotion that seemed to be appearing more and more often lately; shame. Was I leading them on? What were they expecting of me? Was I supposed to choose one of them over the other? I froze, jerking away from Jasper and ducking out from under Edward's arm. I couldn't do this to them. I loved them both, so much, and it just wasn't fair. I needed to make a decision...

They were both staring at me, their expressions of concerned shock identical.

"Are you okay?"

"What's the matter?"

I shook my head, backing away from them. I bumped into a couple, apologizing quickly, before waving Jazz and Edward off. "I'm fine. I'm just...really thirsty. And I have to go get..."

I didn't finish, turning and heading for the back door without another word.

* * *

The cool night air was refreshing after the heat of the house, and I sat on the swinging chair beside Esme's garden for nearly an hour before I heard the quiet tap of someone's feet on the stone path.

"Bella?"

It was Alice. Relief flooded me. I didn't think I wanted to have to explain what I was doing out here, and Alice probably already knew.

"Yeah, Al, I'm over here."

Her costume glittered beautifully in the moonlight, and I found myself smiling just a bit. She sat beside me, giving us a push, so that the wide chair swung slowly back and forth.

"What're you doing out here, Bella? Not having a good time?"

I hastily shook my head. I didn't want her to think that all her hard work had gone to any waste.

"I was having a great time. Probably too good," I mumbled.

"Oh?" She scooted closer and the weight of her cool arm came around my shoulders.

I nodded miserably.

"What's the matter, Bella?"

I sighed. "I figured you'd know."

She chuckled. "Edward's the mind reader; I can just see that your path is incredibly uncertain."

"Figures," I sighed.

I didn't know what to tell her. How much should I say? Which of my thoughts should I share? I hardly understood them myself.

"You can talk to me, about anything," she murmured.

"What am I doing?" I suddenly blurted. Like a stream of vomit, the words came out without my permission and with very little thought. "It's wrong, I know that, but I like them both, Alice. I _love_ them both. Jasper is so easy to be with, he's there for me whenever I need him, and he understands me nearly as well as I know myself. And that should be it, right? If I had to make a choice, that would be the right one, wouldn't it?

Because Edward is overbearing, and condescending, and... But he's trying Alice. For me. To prove to the both of us that I'm strong and capable, and worth more than just his concern. And he makes me feel safe. Isn't that ridiculous? After everything we've been through, after he tried to kill me..." I drew a breath that was half laugh and half sob. "Edward will never let anything hurt me. And that shouldn't be enough, because he drives me crazy. But it's not always bad...I don't know. I don't even know what I'm saying!"

If Alice was taken aback by my sudden outburst she showed none of her surprise, drawing my head down to her shoulder.

"Bella, shhh, it's okay. No one is asking you to choose..."

"They are, though Alice. They already have and they will again. They don't even know it yet, but they will. It's so selfish of me...but why can't I have them both? I want the easy-going Jasper, and the argumentative Edward. But I can't ask them... They wouldn't..."

"Wouldn't they?" Alice asked, apparently able to follow my barely coherent babble well enough.

I shook my head furiously. "No. Carlisle said, he said that they're possessive and jealous, and it just can't work...It won't work."

"Well, you seem to have your mind made up that it won't work."

"Maybe I'll just forget them both and ask Mike Newton out," I laugh-cried.

Alice drew me up, looking into my eyes seriously. "And stay human?" she asked.

I blinked slowly, before hesitantly shaking my head. I'd experienced a lot of the normality that I'd longed for tonight, surrounded by humans who had no knowledge of the supernatural, laughing and dancing and eating... But it just wouldn't be the same. I didn't want any of it without my family. "No. I still want... I can't be without you. Without any of you."

She wasn't able to hide the relief behind her smile.

Taking my hand in hers, she squeezed lightly, giving us another push. We swung our legs gently as I gathered my composure.

"You just have to trust your heart, Bella. Whatever it tells you. And the rest will fall into place."

I smiled faintly. "You sound like a Hallmark card, Alice."

She giggled.

"Do they have Hallmark cards for encouraging your sister to date both of your brothers? New from Hallmark, the "Menage a Trois" selection!"

"Alice!" I laughed, despite the sudden blush that burned in my cheeks.

She shrugged.

"Trust me, Bella. As long as you don't over think things, you will end up happy."

Don't over think things?

Easier said than done.

* * *

**A/N: I apologize for any editing errors. I had to redo all the spacing after I'd written it so, yeah. :P**

**Thanks for reading!**


	30. Flapdoodle

**A/N: Hey guys, I know it's been a while, but this one took some cajoling to get out. It got away from me a little bit, at nearly 10k words, but I hope you enjoy it.**

**As for the title? Well, some craziness happens this chapter, and a well-known thesaurus website has assured me that Flapdoodle is a synonym for insanity. Personally, I just like the way it sounds. :D**

**As always, thanks to everyone that reads!**

**~Ex**

* * *

"_I'm not gonna lie; I'll not be a gentleman. Behind the boathouse I'll show you my dark secret… I'm not gonna lie, I want you for mine…" -Toadies, Possum Kingdom_

Calefaction

Chapter 23

Flapdoodle

I would never understand the machinations of the high school social hierarchy; not even if I grudgingly attended for as many years as Edward had.

Apparently, a successful Halloween party was all it took to catapult an entire family out of 'social pariah' status, where they'd languished for months (not that I was bitter), and into the overrated heights of popularity. It was crazy.

On Monday morning I pulled into my usual spot in the parking lot, expecting the typical 'fun-filled' day of repetitive World War II quizzes (did they really think that we didn't realize they taught us the same thing every other year?) and mortifying attempts at volleyball, better known by me as 'smash-Bella's-ego-to-bits-ball'. Gym class was the hour a day where I definitely missed Emmett the most and I was more than willing to admit that it was for strictly selfish reasons. Without his athletic frame hovering over me, catching my stray bludgeons and righting me when I tripped, my coordination, or lack thereof, had become a weapon of mass destruction. I was really starting to question the wisdom of my request that he keep his distance; since his absence I'd sent seven people to the nurse's office, and made the dreaded trip four times myself.

Hopping out of the car, smiling my thanks as Jasper caught my elbow when my foot promptly slid on a small patch of late autumn ice, I reached for my backpack. Edward beat me to it, the corner of his mouth curling upward in a crooked, devastating grin as he offered it to me with a gentlemanly bow. The effect was somewhat ruined when he gave Jasper a quick shove, but I couldn't help but laugh as Jasper good-naturedly retaliated by pulling the neck of Edward's immaculate Polo up and over his carefully mussed hair. Rolling my eyes, I grabbed Alice's arm and turned toward the school, nearly choking on my chuckles as I drew a sudden gasp of surprise. Peering back at me, a bit too close for comfort, was a pair of eager, cobalt eyes.

"Mike?" I cried breathlessly, my hand flying to my heart where it was stuttering in surprise.

"Bella!" he enthused, his eyes straying nervously toward Jasper and Edward, who were suddenly, suspiciously quiet. I could just imagine Jasper's bemused, and Edward's threatening expression. Poor kid.

Resisting the urge to snap my fingers in front of his face, I opted for a less obvious distraction, smiling and questioning, "Hey, what's up?"

He gave a nervous shuffle as his eyes returned to their original focus, which just happened to be me. "Well, I know you've got Phy Ed first period, and I was wondering if I could, uh... Walk you over there?"

My face went from pink to crimson in about three seconds flat as Alice quickly disengaged herself from my side. Her hushed encouragements that Jasper and Edward should head to class were heard, before I realized that Mike was still talking.

"I think we're starting badminton today, and I know Clapp is going to pair us up, so..." He took a quick breath, glancing at his shoes and rubbing the back of his neck. "You know, I figured we could save a couple kids a trip to the nurse if you and I teamed up?" He suddenly looked up and smiled broadly, revealing a rather cute dimple just above his left cheek.

For a second, I was speechless; I wasn't sure if I should be offended or amused by his candid suggestion. Of course, I was used to the quiet snickers and mocking whispers of the more athletic girls in our class whenever I'd flail about in Gym, but for a virtual stranger to blatantly call me out on my clumsiness? It was a first, to be certain.

Ingenuous blue eyes watched me worriedly, and I realized I'd just been staring at him, silently, for several seconds. I also realized that with his earnest smile, which was rapidly deteriorating at my continued silence, I just couldn't find it in me to be even slightly annoyed with Mike's teasing.

"I'm sorry, Bella, that was rude of me to say, I didn't mean-."

I cut him off with a shake of my head, a raised hand, and a grin. "No, no. It's alright. We both know I'm about as graceful as a gorilla in a china shop."

Mike shot me an amused glance, his shoulders shaking with repressed laughter.

"I thought it was a bull in a china shop?"

Chuckling, I shook my head and replied as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Bulls don't have opposable thumbs."

"You know, Bella," Alice chimed in from behind me. "There are many species of gorilla that are quite agile."

"You may assume, _Alice_, that for the purposes of my idiom, I am not one of the graceful variety, 'kay?" I replied archly, shooting her a glare, which she acknowledged with only a sugary sweet smile. My eyes widened slightly as I took in Edward and Jasper, standing on either side, and slightly behind my petite vampire sister; both wore identically furious expressions and both were directed at the young man beside me. Frowning, I shook my head. I expected such behavior from Edward, but Jasper? I hastily looked away, grasping the edge of Mike's sleeve and tugging him toward the Gym.

"I accept your chivalrous offer, Mike. Though I can't promise that you're going to come out of this unscathed." I really couldn't see the harm in allowing him to be my badminton partner, regardless of my vampire beaus' overreactions. He seemed like a nice enough guy, and who knew? I might actually make some friends this year, yet.

Laughing, though I noticed the slightly apprehensive look he sent behind us, he gave me a gentle nudge with his shoulder. Miraculously, I didn't tip over.

"That's a risk I'm willing to take," he assured me.

Nudging him right back, I smirked. "You're a brave man, Mike. Incredibly foolish, but brave."

It was the first of many strange encounters...

* * *

"Alright, everyone grab a racket and pair up."

I swear, Coach Clapp actually sent me a fearful glance as he announced our instructions for the day.

Nervously tugging at the hem of my standard issue, over-sized gym t-shirt, I reluctantly hopped up. The racket felt awkward in my hand; not an extension of my already homicidal limbs, but some weapon they'd procured for their evil assassination plots. Fun.

So, try, if you can, to imagine my shock, as I fumblingly swung the racket a few times, when not only Mike ran up to greet me, but several other students scampered over as well, including a guy I'd actually knocked unconscious during self-defense training.

"Hey Bella!" An energetic girl who I recognized, but whose name I couldn't recall bounded up to me with a grin. Her pony-tail gave a little bounce every time she moved, and I found myself almost hypnotized by its erratic motions. As she spoke, I silently tried to predict which way it was going to swing next. "That Halloween party was a-mazing!" Barely registering her words, I nodded absently, scowling as her hair twitched to the left when I expected it to move right. She seemed taken aback, presumably by my expression. "Are you alright?"

I blinked, focusing on her confused face, which boasted the most unnatural looking tan I'd ever seen. "Huh? Oh. Yeah, sorry. The uh, party? That was all Alice."

She giggled. "Alice has the most amazing fashion taste!"

It was strange, to hear this girl speaking of Alice as though she knew her, never mind that they were good things coming out of her mouth.

"Yeah, she's pretty into that stuff," I agreed with a half-hearted chuckle. Why was this girl talking to me? Why were there ten other assorted members of the student body listening to our conversation? What the hell was going on?

I didn't get a chance to come up with any answers when the girl suddenly held up her badminton racket. "Anyway, I was just wondering if you wanted to be my partner today?"

"Uhhhh," came my eloquent response.

"Whoa, whoa," the victim I'd knocked out with my misplaced karate kick suddenly interjected. "I want to be Bella's partner."

"Like Bella would be _your_ partner," a pretty blonde exclaimed.

I exhaled slowly, one brow rising, the other furrowing. Was this some kind of alternate universe? Was I dreaming? This could be an episode of the Twilight Zone... I scanned the room for anything out of the ordinary, only to find a fairly uncomfortable looking Emmett with a similar circle of admirers.

Seriously? I could see the connection, as shallow as it was, between the party, and this sudden popularity, but I refused to believe it. These people hated-slash-feared-slash-envied us! How could a single night elicit such a response?

Thankfully, I was saved from further badgering as Mike confidently looped his arm with mine, ducking my stray racket swing like a pro, and smiled at the small group. "Sorry guys, already asked Bella this morning if she wanted to be _my_ badminton partner."

Despite the uncomfortably possessive tone he'd taken with the word 'my', I began to nod, latching onto his words like a drowning person would a life preserver. To say that I was uncomfortable with all of this attention would be a severe understatement. "Uh, yep, that's right. Mike asked me before class, so. I'm good. Thanks though."

Mike was the recipient of a few scowls, before everyone began to pair up.

Thirty three minutes later, I had the feeling that Mike was wishing he hadn't been so nice.

Thus far, I'd tripped over my own shoelaces and toppled us both to the floor, gotten tangled in the net and pulled it down, and hit him or myself with my racket no fewer than eleven times. I'd actually managed to hit him with his own racket at one point.

As I cringed away from the shuttle, wildly waving my racket, somehow losing my grasp, and flinging it halfway across the Gym, Mike finally turned toward me with a strained smile.

Wincing, I shook my head. "I'm sorry! I tried to warn you."

He closed his eyes briefly, taking a deep breath; I assumed he was digging for some hidden spring of patience.

"Look, you're the one that encouraged me to participate," I began testily, my own tolerance waning quickly.

"And I tried to tell you-"

A cool hand on my shoulder cut my words short, and I turned to find Emmett standing beside me, my wayward racket in hand. His eyes narrowed slightly as they came to rest on Mike.

"I believe you lost this," he teased.

I grabbed it out of his hand, and Mike ducked as the backswing nearly hit him in the face. "Thanks, Em," I grumbled, my sudden flush having nothing to do with exertion.

Emmett was chuckling now, and he nodded in Mike's direction. "For a first-timer, you're pretty good at that."

"Pretty good at what?" I demanded, though Mike apparently needed no clarification, and grinned widely.

I whirled back to Mike, seeing Emmett in my peripheral jump out of the way of yet another of my ungainly swings.

Mike smirked. "You're not too bad yourself."

Realization sinking in, I scowled darkly at the both of them, tossing my racket on the floor, before I did any more damage. "Okay, we get it. I'm clumsy!"

Emmett ignored my outburst, shrugging. "Years of practice, let me tell you."

"Hilarious, guys," I grumbled.

And that put me well beyond the threshold of my humiliation limit for the day, so I turned to find Coach Clapp. He waved me off to the locker room before I'd even finished telling him that I wasn't feeling well.

As I dressed, my annoyance was slightly appeased by the knowledge than in less than a year's time, I would possess more grace than any of those prancing jerks. Well, except maybe Emmett, but I'd work on that.

Of course, I'd also be a crazed, bloodthirsty newborn vampire, but that was just a minor detail.

Sighing, I trudged out to sit on the benches, feeling a peculiar, annoying sense of loss that I was able to crush my newfound popularity so quickly. I didn't want friends for reasons other than them liking me, right? So who cared that I just proved their previous thoughts about me right? Right?

"Bella!" The peppy brunette from earlier skipped over, much to my surprise. "Wow. I can't believe how bad Mike was making you look! I mean, how hard is it to set up a serve?"

Glancing over my shoulder, surprised when I didn't find another Bella sitting behind me, I looked back at her with a slight frown. Was she blind? Compared to me, Mike looked like an Olympic gold medalist.

"Uh... Yeah," I responded hesitantly.

"Jess! Let's go!" someone called from near the locker room door.

Ah, yes! That's where I recognized her from. Jessica Stanley, sixth period Algebra, constantly ogling Alice's outfits. A little ditzy, but mostly a nice girl.

"See ya later, Bella!" she called with a wave, and I returned the gesture.

I sat there for a few minutes, as the Gym cleared out, thinking it one of the oddest things I'd seen when Mike and Emmett laughed together all the way to the locker room.

Had Alice seen the response her party would invoke? Had it been her intent all along? She always encouraged me to live normally, but with my siblings being...what they were, I'd never really had the opportunity. With only eleven months to go, maybe this was her way of making up for that.

Or maybe it had nothing at all to do with me. With Alice, I could never be sure.

I was certain of one thing, however.

I couldn't wait to find out how Edward was dealing with all of this attention.

* * *

The rest of the morning passed in much the same way.

In Civics, three guys got yelled at for ignoring our seating arrangement and trying to sit next to Alice. Edward first skipped Biology, leaving me with no lab partner, though several people were more than happy to take his spot, and then Spanish, where grudges be damned, I pleaded with Emmett to keep the crazy people away from me. In every class, I found myself on the receiving end of more unwanted attention than I'd ever had before. Even my last bully hadn't bothered me this much!

When lunch finally rolled around, and I slid into my usual spot, at our usual table, I was desperately wishing that the day was over.

Alice sat down beside me with a grin, her tray more full than usual.

I plucked the chocolate milk from amidst her small city of drinks, as I couldn't bear the thought of standing in line with my sudden admirers, and arched a brow.

"You know, Alice, there are kids in this world who don't have anything at all to eat, yet you took all of this food, knowing full well that you're only going to throw it away."

Her laughter tinkled merrily through the crowded room, drawing several gazes.

"Oh, I didn't buy all of this. Or any of it, in fact," she declared. "The cookie is from Tyler, and the soda is from Eric, and the bagel-"

"I got it," I interrupted, stealing said bagel and scowling at the absence of cream cheese.

"What the fuck is going on around here?" Emmett questioned cheerfully as he took the seat across from me. I tried to restrain myself, but I couldn't help but stare at him curiously. Emmett hadn't sat with us since Rose left.

Well, I hadn't _let_ him sit with us since Rose left, but that was mostly due to the company he chose to keep, and his human companion was notably absent today. I couldn't help but wonder how much damage Edward's shenanigans had caused. Not that I cared...

Alice shrugged unconvincingly. "Whatever do you mean?"

Emmett smirked, grabbing the small cup of cream cheese off his tray and sliding it across the table to me suddenly. I smiled a bit warily in thanks. Just because he was playing the role of sweet older brother today didn't mean I'd fully forgiven him for what he'd done.

"Of all the foolish, ridiculous, hare-brained schemes, Alice..." Edward's arctic tone of voice left no question as to how he felt about all of this. He nearly slammed his tray onto the table as he stiffly sat down beside me. "You knew this would happen," he hissed accusingly, leaning over me to glare at Alice.

"'Course she knew, it's Alice," Jasper agreed smilingly, giving our little pre-cog a nudge so that he could take her spot on my left.

"Where were you in Biology and Spanish?" I demanded, looking at Edward's nearly barren tray and deciding I wanted his fruit salad. He pushed it my way without even glancing at me. "You left me completely alone with these people!"

"Hey, I took care of you in Spanish!" Emmett protested, poking a Jell-o cube before picking it up to sniff lightly.

"You won't like that," I assured him, taking the jiggling orange gelatin away.

"I couldn't take it!" Edward replied. "Two hours of giggling, flirtation and idle chatter. Someone had the gall to slap me on the back, Bella! A boy...touched me!"

I choked on the laughter that I tried to bite back.

"The nerve!" I agreed as solemnly as I was able.

"It's not funny."

Jasper decided it was a good time to chime in, drawling lazily, "I think it's pretty funny."

"Yes, well you're rather easily amused, aren't you?"

Emmett had snatched the Jell-o back. He gave it a slight squeeze, before popping an entire cube into his mouth.

Conversation died for a moment as we silently watched him chew thoughtfully. His expression swiftly morphed from curiosity to horrified disgust.

He promptly spit it back onto his tray.

"Ugh, tastes like shit!"

Leaning forward, a 'told-ya-so' smirk curling my lips, I questioned, "Eat shit often?"

He laughed, and I realized, just then, how much I'd missed that sound; how much I'd missed being the cause of it. Damn him.

"Well, Bella, wrestling with the wildlife isn't exactly the most clean of tasks..."

I wrinkled my nose. "Ew."

"Can we _please_ get back to the subject at hand?" Edward demanded. I half expected him to stomp his foot.

"What's the big deal?" Emmett asked. "Just scowl all scary-like at them, insult their intelligence, and be a dick. You're good at that. You'll fend them off in no time."

Edward sullenly opened and closed his bottled water over and over, not even bothering to look offended. He was good at driving people away, we all knew it. "I've tried all of that. It just seems to encourage the idiots. One insipid girl actually had the thought that I was mysteriously sexy. _Mysteriously sexy_. Humans are far too susceptible to the ridiculous propaganda of the media these days."

I snickered.

"Calm down, Edward," Alice soothed. "The worst of it will blow over in a few days."

He scowled, and I marveled that he could still look so handsome with that petulant expression on his face.

His eyes were slightly startled as they suddenly swung toward me, and I hastily averted my gaze, poking a lumpy piece of watermelon with my spork as I willed my cheeks to lose some of their color. Darn mind readers.

"What I don't understand is why you bothered with all of this in the first place," he argued, rather feebly. Most likely because, despite their amazing powers, we couldn't go back in time and change what had happened. Now it was just a matter of dealing with the consequences. The reasoning behind Alice's plotting was irrelevant.

"Well, Edward, not that you could possibly understand this, being so detached from your humanity, despite your claims of empathy," Alice declared, much to my surprise, "but Bella here, needs friends." Emmett opened his mouth and Alice mercilessly cut him off. "_Human_ friends, Em. Regardless of our misgivings, or apathy on the subject," she glanced at Jasper who simply smiled in response. "She doesn't have much time left, and though I know that she's had a good life with us, I don't think she truly knows what she'll be giving up when she's changed."

I frowned at my sister. It was the first time she'd ever voiced any misgivings to my change. "Alice," I protested. "I don't care what you think I'll be giving up. I want to be with you guys. Forever."

Though he'd been protesting the most loudly to the situation created by Alice's scheming, Edward now appeared to be its biggest advocate. He nodded. I sighed. Here we go.

"No, she's right Bella. Think about it. For as long as you can remember, haven't you always had us at your side, easing your transitions, and assisting you when we were able? You've access to hundreds of years of knowledge, you want for nothing, and we leap at every opportunity to solve your problems before they've truly begun. Aside from your brief friendship with Emmett's dalliance, who was questionably normal, you've had no real concept of humanity."

My temper flared, anger igniting like wildfire spreading through my veins at his presumption. I bit my cheek, attempting to calm myself, before I shouted something that the entire school did _not_ need to hear. A cool hand came to rest on my back, easing beneath the hem of my shirt to rub a soothing circle on my skin. Tranquility seemed to flow straight from Jasper's palm and into me, causing the red haze that tinted the edges of my vision to recede. I gave him a slight smile in thanks, and he nodded.

Swinging my eyes back to Edward, I was careful to keep my tone quiet and level.

"Edward. I sincerely hope that you did not just tell me that I wasn't aware of my humanity. Because let me tell you, being adopted by _vampires_," I hissed the word, "I am nothing _but_ aware of it. Hyper-sensitive to it, even. Aware of every weakness and fault. Aware that I'm growing old and essentially _dying_ while you all stay the same. Aware that the slightest cut could mean the death of me. Aware that I am privy to information that I should not be, and that _that_ could mean the death of me!"

Alice reached over Jasper to lay her hand on mine, drawing my gaze. She smiled kindly, though it held a hint of melancholy. "But that's just it, Bella. You see being human as such a negative thing. You're more than happy to relinquish it, because you've come to hate it. You unfairly compare yourself to us, but the gift of mortality is just as valuable as what we've been burdened with."

I pulled my hand away from her grasp, clutching it with the other in my lap. She was wrong. I knew some happiness in my humanity, but I also knew that I would be happier once they'd made me immortal.

"Look around, darlin'," Jasper encouraged.

I nearly groaned. Et tu Jas? The last thing I needed right now was a lecture on the virtues of humanity. My decision was made. Why did we have to do this?

He must have felt my frustration, because he chuckled and gave me a gentle nudge with his shoulder. "C'mon Bella, just humor me."

I did as he bade, unable to deny that extra Southern inflection he wove into his words. I took in the familiar scene of the cafeteria, so full it was nearly overflowing. A few tables over, Mike and his friends were throwing food at each other as stealthily as possible, laughing like mad. To their left were Jessica and an assorted group of kids, flipping through magazines and talking animatedly. And over there, a quiet group of studying students, arguing good-naturedly about some fact or another. All around us there was the din of cheerful chatter, and I was suddenly, acutely aware that I was in no way a part of it. Other than my family, I had no friends, I didn't participate in anything I didn't have to, and far too many of my thoughts were obsessed with my eighteenth birthday, and not for the normal teenage reasons.

"Oh," I said quietly, understanding dawning. I was so desperate to become a vampire, so focused on all my human faults, that I didn't really allow myself to enjoy humanity at all. Well geez, if they wanted to put it that way.

"Look, Bella. I'm not trying to change your mind. Quite the opposite," Alice murmured. "I just want you to experience things while you can fully enjoy them, untainted by the inevitable darkness that comes with this life. You've always had a foot in each world, and I think you need to live with both feet in your human shoes for a bit."

The corners of my lips began to tip upward, despite my silently willing them not to. "Let me put it to you in a way you'll understand, Alice. My human shoes are ten dollar heels from Walmart. And you guys are all wearing Louboutins."

Alice giggled. "I didn't think you'd paid attention to my designers! But really. Give them a chance, break them in. They're better than you give them credit for."

"We'll see," I hedged, shaking my head. Only Alice could appreciate a 'living life to the fullest' shoe metaphor.

The warning bell took that moment to ring, and I hopped up. Alice grabbed my hand, and I curiously peered down into her onyx gaze.

"Just think about it, Bella. They're not all bad. Give them a few days to get over the fawning stage, and let them in. They might just surprise you."

I took a quiet breath, thinking over the words. No, I couldn't have a completely normal life, but that shouldn't prevent me from actually having friends, should it? I was old enough to understand the reasoning behind keeping our secrets and, Lys aside, the implications of revealing them... I nodded slowly.

"Alright."

Alice smiled happily, before turning to pin her gleeful gaze on Edward.

"Oh, but Edward? Watch out for the blonde next period. You may have rejected her once, but she's not about to take another no for an answer. I believe the word she'll use is...mysterious."

He sighed, rubbing his hand over his eyes.

"Why, Alice?"

Laughing, she grabbed him by the arm and hauled him out of his seat.

"Because it amuses me, Edward, and that's all the reason I need."

* * *

I sat next to Jessica Stanley in Algebra.

It was strange; not sitting with Alice or Edward, but it was also kind of nice. She didn't know what I was going to say before I said it, she only knew the emotions I decided to show, and the one time her gaze grew blank, the vision she was experiencing was a daydream about our oddly attractive math teacher.

We talked about Mike Newton, who, it turned out, she had a 'huge crush on', and struggled through the math assignment together. By the end of the period, she seemed genuinely interested in me, and not just because I was Alice's sister.

As we walked out, she suddenly turned to me, "Hey, a bunch of us are going to the movies this weekend, did you want to come with?"

To my surprise, I was nodding before I'd even realized I'd made up my mind.

The rest of the week passed in a blur of unfamiliar social activity. Two trips into Port Angeles for shopping (Alice had invited herself to those), a nature hike, and a trip to the beach all over the course of four days... Who knew that having friends could be so exhausting? I had plans for breakfast with Mike & Co. on Saturday morning, a movie with Jess on Saturday night, and a study session with Angela Sunday afternoon, at her place, of course.

It'd become increasingly easy to identify who actually enjoyed me, just because I was me (Angela, Jes, Mike), and those that were mostly interested in my last name and the imagined glory it entailed (Lauren, Tyler, my self-defense victim). I was surprised by the number of people that actually wanted to befriend me, once my siblings allowed them to.

For obvious reasons, they couldn't allow themselves to be quite as social as I was, but they were cautiously joining in; Emmett and Alice especially. And shockingly, Friday afternoon at lunch, Edward asked if I wanted to go miniature golfing with him.

I actually choked on my pizza. Emmett, who was still on the outs with Lys, slapped me on the back roughly.

"Geez, Em, I thought you were trying to save me, not do more damage!" I reprimanded.

He grinned rather bashfully.

"Choking suicide... Not quite the reaction I was expecting," Edward admitted with a wry grin.

I looked at him, shaking my head. "I was just surprised that you were asking me out." My face flamed as something occurred to me. "Wait. _Were_ you asking me out? Like, on a date? Or is this just a family type of..."

"A date," he interrupted.

Pursing my lips, I nodded. Of course, my life couldn't be easy. Rather than _just_ a charming Southern vampire suitor, I had to have an angel-faced martyr who both infuriated and inspired me competing with him. Add my traitorous brain who had decided I should have both, and this was a recipe for disaster.

I glanced at Jasper, who watched me impassively. We hadn't gone out again since that single date, and he hadn't indicated that he was interested in continuing anything physically with me. Would he be upset if I said yes? Did I want to say yes?

"Sure," I finally agreed, unable to come up with any good reason not to.

Edward smiled; the lop-sided little grin that always had detrimental effects on my pulse.

"Great. I'll pick you up at seven," he teased.

Rolling my eyes, I failed to notice the deep frown etched on Jasper's face.

* * *

I didn't let Alice help me get ready for my date. I had enough to worry about without her fretting over my eyelash length and lip plumpness. (Seriously, these are things that worry her)

Instead, I gently declined her offer and dug the most worn pair of jeans out of my closet. The zipper had a habit of slipping down at inopportune times, and there were several small holes along the knees and thighs, but they were my favorites. Easing into them was almost a sort of home coming.

I paired them with a purple and black plaid hoody and pulled my hair into a ponytail. A sheen of lip gloss, a touch of mascara and just a spritz of perfume, and I was good to go. Ten minutes. Take that, Alice.

Walking out of my room, I almost had a heart attack as I turned toward the stairs, and nearly ran right into Jasper, who was leaning against the wall beside my door.

"Jasper!" I gasped, stumbling back.

He caught and steadied me, but didn't respond otherwise. His pensive gazed moved almost restlessly over my face. I took in his unusually messy blonde locks, and the general disarray of his clothing. There was a smudge of what looked to be dirt on his white t-shirt, and his boots were leaving bits of debris on Esme's clean carpet; he'd most likely just come from a hunt. Personally, I didn't think the mess detracted from his appearance one bit, but I was probably a bit biased.

When I finished my perusal, he still hadn't said a word.

"Jas?"

The word seemed to incite something within him, and he gently, yet firmly, pushed me against the wall, caging me in with his much larger frame. My heart seemed to halt for a moment, before resuming double time; the wild thudding loud to my ears. I was aware of every inch of his lean body; the cool, hard planes scant millimeters from my own soft warmth.

"Jasper?" I murmured, mortified at the breathy tone of my voice. I didn't get a chance to dwell on it as his lips suddenly descended, crashing down on mine as though he were afraid he'd never get this opportunity again. I melted immediately, abandoning all sense of sanity as I wrapped my arms around him, raking my fingers through his hair. He gave a low growl of approval and I felt the vibration all the way to my toes.

His tongue laved a cool path over my lower lip, leaving a trail of fire in its wake, and I uttered a quiet whimper as it burned straight down to my stomach, and then lower. He took my parted lips as invitation, and probed tentatively, before venturing in to taste every warm crevice of my mouth. He cupped my face tenderly, a sharp contrast to the fiercely possessive kiss, and I shivered.

Lust rolled off of him in palpable waves, feeding the embers of my own, until the blaze that was ignited was well beyond either of our control. Jasper's hand skimmed down my side, just grazing the side of my breast, brushing the indent of my waist, kneading my hip... His hand closed around my thigh, dragging it up so that my leg was hooked around him. I murmured in surprise as his hips pressed against mine, and proof that he was still interested, at least physically, made itself known.

He pulled away when I was light-headed with my need for oxygen, and I panted softly as he dusted gentle kisses over my jaw and neck, his lips lingering on my racing pulse. His hand slipped upward, fingertips just grazing the curve of my bottom, before sliding down to tease against the denim-covered heat between my legs. I stiffened; a current of electricity crackling through me. Awareness of his hand, and where exactly it was touching was amplified to an almost painful degree, and I wasn't sure if I wanted him to withdraw, or never move his hand again.

His fingers curled, just slightly, and the pressure intensified, drawing a breathless cry from my throat.

I knew that I should stop him, right now, before this _really_ got out of hand, but I just couldn't bring myself to push him away. I didn't want to push him away, even knowing that Edward was sitting in his car, just outside of the front door, waiting for me.

Luckily, Jasper was able to keep some semblance of self-control, even when I'd long since abandoned mine.

He drew back slowly, free hand braced against the wall by my head, his breath cool as it bathed my warm face, the sweet scent dizzying. His other hand, however, did not depart. No. He hitched my leg higher up, sliding his hand over the seat of my jeans before it came to rest directly between my legs, his palm pressing exactly at the very center of my thighs. I thought I might spontaneously combust. Pleasure caused my lower belly to clench, and my hips moved of their own volition.

When he spoke, a low, rumbling tone against my ear, I nearly came undone. Goosebumps raced across my arms, and I wanted nothing more than to pull Jasper into my bedroom and find out what that touch would feel like with a whole lot fewer clothes between us.

"Listen, darlin'," he growled. "I can understand how you might be confused, what with everything that's been going on, but there's something you should know." His fingers flexed and every nerve ending from my waist down seemed to contract and tingle. My hands slid to his shoulders, gripping them tightly as I attempted to stay upright. "I want you, and I know damn well that you want me." His palm pressed pointedly against the small bundle of nerves at the crux of my sex, and I shuddered, any hope I had of coherent speech promptly failing me. "And Edward or no, I intend to have you."

His lips lingered for several seconds; seconds that felt at once brief, yet endless.

And then he was gone.

The whole thing left me a lot more shaken up than I cared to admit.

Without his support, I slid to the floor in a boneless heap, remaining there for nearly fifteen minutes until my brain functions decided to resume.

I couldn't decide if I was relieved or irritated by Jasper's behavior.

Yes, I was glad that he'd decided to remind me that he _was_, in fact, interested in pursuing something between us... What that might be, I wasn't sure, but had he needed to do so just minutes before I had another date? And with a _mind reader_, no less?

It was the first time that I'd seen that side of Jasper; that mile-wide possessive streak that Edward displayed so proudly. And now that my thoughts weren't singularly revolving around a very specific portion of my anatomy, I found myself mildly annoyed with him. I could admit to myself that it was mostly in principle; that knee-jerk self-righteous, 'I don't belong to anyone' spiel that stemmed from a primal response I wasn't sure I wanted to acknowledge, but I was still aggravated.

He had some nerve, staking claims that he never seemed willing to follow through on. I wasn't so naïve that I couldn't see the potential dangers; his strength and my fragility, Edward's inevitably terrible reaction, but was _some_ relief too much to ask for? His hands were just so much more adept and agile...

Scrubbing my hands over my face, as though that would clear away the insidious thoughts, I forced myself to my feet.

Now was definitely not the time to be contemplating such things, not with Edward waiting.

Thankfully, Alice walked by at just that moment and I grabbed her sleeve.

"Distract me!" I demanded.

If her expression was anything to go by, she was unsurprised by my request. Of course. Her smirk grated on my nerves, but I was far too desperate at the moment to call her on it.

She looped her arm through mine and began guiding me slowly down the stairs.

"So, did I tell you how Lauren practically mauled Edward in class the other day?" she trilled.

By the time I slid into the passenger's seat of Edward's car with a smile and an apology, Jasper was the last thing on my mind.

* * *

"Of all the ridiculous..." I grumbled irritably as I waded through the chlorinated, man-made river my ball had flown into.

"Right there, Bella!" Edward called far too cheerfully, as my fingers fumbled over several rocks and what felt to be an empty can.

The irony of the situation really wasn't lost on me; the place that I had assumed Jasper was going to take me on our first date was the place that Edward _had_ taken me for ours. Apparently I didn't know these two nearly as well as I thought I did; not when it came to dating. Of course, given our familial history, that was probably a good thing...

"Coming?" Edward called, and I grit my teeth so hard that they actually hurt.

Who'd have thought that Edward could be so competitive? It was miniature golf, for God's sake.

It'd all started well enough. We'd arrived at the carnival-esque Putt and Go, and Edward had immediately indulged my junk food requests of a funnel cake, a corn dog, and a chocolate malt so thick I couldn't even suck it through the straw. His expression of mild disgust was rather amusing as he peered skeptically at the golden-battered hot dog on a stick, but it quickly faded into a smile as he saw how much I was enjoying myself.

Dinner? Check. Wildly successful in my humble opinion.

Then we'd taken a spin in the go-karts. Edward had checked my helmet at least a half dozen times, but I didn't mind too much, particularly when his fingers caressed lightly down the side of my neck, and he grinned crookedly as my breathing hitched. We were both left dusty and laughing by the time we made our way around the dirt track several times, and I actually managed to pull ahead and win the race, though Edward teasingly complained that he had a defective car.

Phase one of the entertainment? Complete. Equal parts fun and enlightening as I saw a side of Edward that I never had before.

But the miniature golfing? Hrmm...

I didn't have any expectations of winning coming into the game, not against Mr. Vampire, with his perfect hand-eye coordination and mastery of all things physical. But I also hadn't expected him to be such a poor winner!

I'd seen it a few times before, when he and Jasper or Emmett had been competing against one another in something trivial, but he'd certainly never done it to me, and last I checked? Throwing your date's loss in her face was considered seriously poor form.

By the time we got to the sixth hole, and (surprise, surprise) Edward got another hole in one, his pointed smirk was enough to make me want to quit. I desperately tried to mask my true thoughts while secretly wondering how much damage my little pink putter could do to his face.

And now here we were, hole nine of twelve, and I was wading through this revolting little stream, littered with disgusting things that I'd rather not think of, squinting against the harsh glare of a flood light as I searched for my ball. Edward stood on the bank, smiling and offering 'helpful' advice.

"There! You've practically got it."

He was right. My knuckles brushed the pocked surface of the ball, and I wrapped my fingers around it, giving a swift, hard tug. Unfortunately, I'd misjudged just how stuck it was, which wasn't very, and the force of my yank sent me toppling backward into the filthy water.

I imagined, as I flew out of the water with an angry shriek, that I probably looked and sounded a lot like a furious cat might in a similar situation. I scrambled up the embankment and threw the neon pink ball at Edward's feet.

"That's it! I'm done!" I shouted into his handsome, laughing face, pushing my bedraggled ponytail over my shoulder.

He just smirked, ducking to grab the ball. "C'mon Bella, it's just a little water. We've got another couple holes to-"

"No! We don't!" I knew that I was overreacting, at least a little bit, but I couldn't stem the rising tide of anger any more than I could have stopped a rampaging bull with my bare hands. "You bring me here, and you set me up to have this great time, and then you just revert to this smug, arrogant...poor sport!" The lame insult only served to further infuriate me. "You may not be writing anything down, but I know your stupid superhuman brain is keeping score! And you're just a little too self-satisfied about my being over par by like a zillion-"

"Twenty-three," he scoffed.

Face hot, I growled, "I'm done; I want to go home!"

He stared at me silently a moment, a sculpted brow rising in response to my sudden tirade.

And then he surprised me by saying one of the most unexpectedly human responses I'd ever heard pass his lips.

"Seriously, Bella? What are you, like five?" He held my club and ball out to me, rolling his eyes.

I gaped, the anger I'd been clinging to so tightly slipping from my grasp in favor of shock and if I was honest with myself, a touch of amusement. Edward had never spoken to me in such a way. He'd chastised, praised, condescended and cajoled. But never had he taken my temper in stride and thrown back such a coolly amused response.

"Come on, let's finish our game."

I mutely took my ball and club, my feet moving of their own accord as we headed toward the next hole. I was literally stunned into silence. Every thought that flitted through my head never made it to my lips; I wasn't sure what I should even say.

Edward placed his yellow ball on the artificial green, easily hitting it through the windmill's rotating blades and into the white cup on the other side. A small red light atop the windmill flashed and Edward turned back to me with an easy smile.

"Your turn."

Shivering lightly as a cool evening breeze whisked over my wet clothes, I stepped forward, setting my ball on the green. I peered at the hole, which suddenly seemed much further away than it should, and pulled back my club.

"Too far," Edward murmured.

I glanced over my shoulder with a scowl.

He shrugged. "Just trying to help. You have to remember, that ball doesn't weigh much and you're not trying to send it flying. Just a tap should be sufficient."

"Not all of us are gifted with the coordination you have," I grumbled, turning back to the game.

My next set of shivers had absolutely nothing to do with my quickly freezing limbs.

Edward stepped up behind me, close enough that I could feel the outline of the zipper on his sweatshirt pressing into my back. Like two iron bands, his arms came around me, his hands resting atop mine on my club. When he spoke, his breath, sweet and cool, dusted my cheek, and I forgot how to breathe.

"It's easy, let me show you."

I followed his lead without protest, my brain on some sort of extended vacation, as he brought the club back, just a bit, and swung it forward. He did that several more times, making me acutely aware of the tightening of the muscles in his arms and abs. Never mind that my bottom was currently nestled between his hips.

"See?" he declared, jerking me out of my silent admiration of his physique. "Simple."

I nodded, fighting irrational disappointment as he stepped back. Had he been as aware of our proximity as I was? Or was I just making a complete fool of myself?

"Simple, right..."

I brought the club back, trying to replicate the motion he'd shown me, though I hadn't been focused on it at all, and hit the ball. It sped down the strip of green, just made it past the windmill's trap, and sank into the cup on the other side.

For the second time within a matter of minutes, I was speechless.

"You did it!" he declared jovially, suddenly grabbing me up and swinging me around. I laughed, dropping my club and wrapping my arms around his neck.

He only set me back on my feet when I warned him that he was about to experience my corn dog for the second time.

Chuckling, he steadied me as I regained what little equilibrium I possessed, his dark toffee eyes scanning my face. A thoughtful frown crossed his face as he peered at my lips, which I figured must have a slightly bluish tint by now.

"Cold?"

"A little," I admitted, my teeth giving a belying chatter.

He shrugged out of his gray sweatshirt, draping it over my shoulders. I tried not to notice how good he looked in his fashionably worn jeans and button up, his yellow tie loose around his neck.

"It's not warm," he apologized wryly.

Slipping my arms into the long sleeves, I zipped it up, hoping I wasn't obvious when I pressed my nose against the collar and breathed. It was a combination of cologne and something sweetly vampire. In other words, it smelled incredibly good.

"It's dry," I argued.

Grinning, he picked up our clubs, retrieved our balls and headed for the eleventh hole. I followed behind, wringing excess water from my hair in an attempt to stave off hypothermia.

When we came to hole eleven, I decided that somebody had it out for me.

It was a lighthouse. Surrounded by murky, yucky water.

I must have groaned aloud because Edward laughed.

"It's not that bad."

"You're trying to kill me," I disagreed.

He tried to hand me my club and I pushed it back toward him.

"No, thanks."

Clucking his tongue in disapproval, he easily made his shot, followed by mine.

"Wow, I'm doing a lot better now that I'm not actually playing," I teased.

He rolled his eyes, though they held laughter.

I strode toward our balls, intending to scoop them up, when my shoelaces, which had come untied at some point, decided to try their hand at homicide. I tripped, and the familiar sensation of falling came over me as I squeezed my eyes closed, bracing for impact with the chilly water.

Impact that, thankfully, never came. Edward's arms closed around me, and I wondered if he'd moved at human or vampire speed as we flew several feet away, landing in the soft grass with a thud.

Edward's concerned gaze came into focus as his hands began to move quickly over me.

"Are you alright?" he breathed.

A quick, mental evaluation decided that, though there was a small pile of rocks digging into my hip, I seemed to be alright. I nodded, unable to speak just yet, the breath knocked out of me from our fall.

"You didn't hit your head?" His fingers probed lightly over my scalp, and a curious warmth tingled over the back of my neck.

"No," I gasped softly, wanting to reassure him and erase the concern that drew his brows together in such a fierce scowl. I reached up, rubbing at the small creases lightly.

He peered down at me, holding himself up on one hand, his knees on either side of my legs. A stray lock of auburn hair had strayed from its neatly tousled brethren, and I brushed it back. It still amazed me how such breathtaking beauty could hide such terrible darkness...

Edward's hand slid slowly from the back of my head to cradle my neck in its sure strength, the smooth pad of his thumb feathering over my quickly accelerating pulse.

"Darkness that you are so willing to submit yourself to," he murmured with a frown.

I swallowed against the sudden dryness of my throat. I knew firsthand just what Edward, and the others, were capable of when their precarious control slipped and the civil façade dropped away. Jasper had struggled for years, Edward had attacked me, and there had been plenty of mistakes.

But I also knew of their capacity for love and goodness. Carlisle had saved far more lives than he had taken. And they'd accepted me unconditionally as family. They chose to be better than the monsters they so easily could be.

I watched Edward's face as these thoughts flitted through my head, not expecting the brief pain reflected in his expression.

He leaned closer, and I pushed up on my elbows, meeting him halfway as his lips descended.

The cool touch of his lips on mine sent a jolt of electricity through me. His long fingers made quick work of my ponytail, releasing the damp curls before running gently through them. I reached up, pulling him down as I wrapped my arms around his neck. He uttered a quiet moan against my lips.

He settled carefully over me, easing one of his legs between mine and pressing his body flush to my own. His teeth nipped at my lower lip and I gasped. His tongue darted in to take advantage of the moment, cool and sweet as it tasted the warmth of my mouth.

My head began to swim as warmth tingled pleasantly through my limbs. Edward drew back and I gasped for air I hadn't even realized I'd needed. He used his grasp on my hair to pull my head to the side, raining light kisses to my neck and jaw.

It was reminiscent of Jasper's kisses earlier...

No... I shouldn't think of that right now...

I opened my heavy-lidded gaze and looked at Edward, reminding myself who I was with; he was frowning.

"I'm sorry," I murmured regretfully.

Edward shook his head, silencing my apology. His eyes, dark now, held a hint of something primitive.

"He kissed you?"

I tried, I truly did, to keep the encounter from playing out in my head, but it was futile. Edward must have seen it all; Jasper's kiss, his teasing touches, and possessive words, as well as his sudden withdrawal.

And then he was smiling, a self-assured smile that made me equal parts nervous and curious.

"Never? He's never brought you release?" Edward murmured, his voice like velvet against my already overactive nerve-endings. I felt blood flushing my face, and though I wanted to refuse him answer, he'd already seen. I shook my head.

"Then let me remind you, my love, just who you are with."

Pale fingers ghosted lightly over my torso, and I was almost painfully aware of every touch, despite the thick layers of wet cloth between us. He brushed over my nipples, eliciting a startled gasp from my lips, before smoothing down the flat expanse of my stomach. I followed his hand with my gaze. What was he about?

And then, as his fingers easily slid the button of my jeans open, I realized, and I quickly grasped his wrist.

"Edward! What are you... You can't... We're in public!"

His lop-sided grin made a small thrill of excitement spiral down between my thighs.

"There's nobody here but us, Bella."

I shook my head, tugging at his now immobile hand resting just inside the waist of my pants. His cold fingers brushed against the very top of my underwear, and I gave a slight jerk.

"Edward," I pleaded.

"Bella, let me show you what you've been missing," he breathed, leaning in to press his lips to mine once more.

Under the influence of his kiss, my resistance waned. He would know if someone was coming, well in advance of our being caught, wouldn't he? And I so desperately wanted to know what it was like to come apart at the hand of someone other than myself. I wanted the completion he was offering.

But what about Jasper... What would he think? Hadn't he made me the very same promise this afternoon... What kind of girl would do this to two...

And then coherent thought was no more.

Edward had pulled the zipper of my jeans down, and his hand was pressed into the opening it provided, and it was moving. Oh God, it was moving. His knee pushed my legs further apart, and his fingertips were brushing lightly back and forth against the damp cotton between my thighs. It felt amazing... I couldn't even compare what he was currently doing with what my own inexpert hand had attempted.

My fingers clutched his wrist tightly, no longer attempting to pull him away, but encouraging further exploration. He pulled away from the kiss.

"Look at me," he commanded, his voice no more than a murmur.

Obediently, my eyes fluttered open, though I found it nearly impossible to focus.

"You're beautiful, Bella."

I couldn't tell if the blush that suddenly warmed my cheeks was due to his words, or his touch, as his cool fingers suddenly pushed aside the material of my underwear so that he had unobstructed access to my flesh.

His fingertip slid, slowly, oh so slowly, down, pressing just between my lips, and I gripped his shoulders as though he would disappear if I didn't. I shuddered as his finger moved back up, circling the swollen bundle of nerves that was capable of bringing such pleasure.

"Edward!" I gasped, as he circled it, and he growled quietly in response.

My hips were moving restlessly; this time I knew what they were seeking.

"Please," I murmured, and our eyes met.

His groan was guttural as he leaned in, his breath on my face making it even more impossible to think. His fingers slid down, circling the entrance to my body, and then, he was inside of me.

It was unlike anything I could have imagined. There was pressure; the initial penetration of his finger almost uncomfortably odd, but then...

I cried out sharply, writhing at the sudden wave of dark pleasure that melted through me. Heat, electricity... it all centered between my legs, building as Edward's finger withdrew, only to press in once more. I could feel muscles that I'd never used before, clenching around the invasion, whether to reject or welcome it, I couldn't be certain. All I knew was that I would die, I would die right now, if he stopped.

"I won't stop," he whispered, his gaze avid.

His thumb circled the nub at the crux of my sex, easing around it several times, before brushing it directly, which must have been equivalent to being struck with the most pleasant of lightning. He set a rhythm with both fingers, a steady plunge and withdrawal in tandem with the small circle, and I quickly began to unravel.

Something was building, something that threatened to sweep me away in the tidal wave it would create, and my heart raced wildly in fearful anticipation.

This was actually happening. I was allowing this. And it was going to change everything...

I peered down and saw Edward's hand, moving insistently beneath the fabric of my jeans, and liquid fire pooled low in my belly.

I wanted this. I needed it.

I closed my eyes, allowing the current to carry me away.

Edward suddenly gave the slightest of pinches to the most sensitive of areas, and I was undone.

His lips crashed down on mine as the tension that had been building caused me to shatter. My cries were lost in his mouth as pleasure wracked me, my fingers and toes going numb, limbs buzzing with energy. My head was pleasantly light, devoid of anything but the sensations Edward provided; a steady pulse of pleasure throbbing between my legs.

This was what it was about... This was what I'd been missing...

I came down several amazing seconds later, gasping.

"I love you, Bella," Edward murmured near my ear.

I almost flinched, the words dragging me out of the pleasant haze I'd been content to wade through. God, I wanted to say it back to him, because I knew he wanted to hear it, but I wasn't sure... about my feelings at all, and until I was, I couldn't do that to him.

"Thank you," I whispered, leaning up to brush a kiss to his lips.

A low rumble was our only warning as the skies suddenly opened up, and a deluge of frigid rain came pelting down out of the sky.

Laughing, Edward pulled me to my feet, his hands swiftly righting my clothing as we made a mad dash for the car, our clubs and balls abandoned.

So that's what I'd been missing...

* * *

**A/N: What'd you think? Don't worry, Jasper will be getting his turn very soon. ;P**


	31. Impossibilities

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry about the incredible delay on this update. (An understatement to be certain) Between quitting my job and the holidays, unfortunately, my writing has really been put on the back burner. But hopefully, now that things are settled, I'll be able to get back into it!**

**Thanks to everyone that sent pms and reviews making sure I was still alive and providing encouragement. **

**So, this chapter was originally something like 20,000 words, but, deciding that was too long, I broke it into two parts. This is kind of a transition chapter, without a ton of action, but hopefully it'll still be up to par. The other half of this chapter is already written, so I'll probably post it in a couple of days. It contains some very yummy Bella-Jasper time! (Spoiler alert :P)**

**Thanks again for sticking with me and my ridiculously erratic updating schedule.**

**Meet me at the bottom for some info about a Valentine's Day Countdown I'm writing for!**

* * *

Calefaction

Chapter 24

Impossibilities

Edward PoV

"Hey."

Jasper didn't look up as I approached, nor did he respond to my tentative greeting. Not surprising, really, considering I'd just chased him nearly 100 miles north of the house; pointedly ignoring his obvious need for solitude in favor of the chance to speak with him regarding a matter that had been weighing rather heavily on my mind. He'd led me on a merry little chase along the Pacific coast and up into the rugged Canadian wilderness, felling trees and churning up great clods of earth in his wake; as though the destructive obstacle course would deter me. I followed him at a respectable distance, knowing he had no hopes of outrunning me, until he finally realized the same. As we reached a deep, craggy ravine he shot a wary glance over his shoulder and came to a halt, perching on the lip of the canyon with his feet dangling down into the misty depths.

He didn't speak.

Despite my persistence, neither did I. I didn't know how to broach the necessary subject, and more importantly, I had no idea how he would react when we finally peeled back the layers of subterfuge to reveal the true problem at the heart of our contention. There was a great deal that needed to be said, and I didn't expect any of it to be pleasant.

But after everything that had happened there were no further doubts in my mind that it was time for Jasper and I to set aside our egos, if such a thing were even possible, and sincerely discuss Bella's role, both current and future, in each of our lives. Loathe as I was to admit it, I could no longer deny that Bella's interest in Jasper was not the shallow, passing infatuation I'd hoped it to be; her feelings...her love for him ran far deeper than I'd first ascertained. However, neither could Jasper deny that I had taken a firm root in Bella's heart, despite her initial fear and misgivings. He may never admit it to me, but I was certain he could feel the love Bella and I shared, burgeoning and new though it may be.

And we could argue who she loved more until we were as ancient and out of our minds as the benefactors of the Volturi, but none of it would change what I had seen last night. The image I had plucked from Bella's lust-hazed subconscious, an image that had both horrified and intrigued me, was what had spurred this insistent pursuit.

Still, I did not speak. How, precisely, did one go about asking his vampire brethren if they were interested in_ sharing_ the human girl that had lived with them as a sister for years, and whom they both loved? It wasn't really a query that rolled off the tongue. And honestly, I wasn't certain that _I_ was in favor of the idea, myself. When something as simple as a shared smile between them was enough to unleash my demon in all of its snarling fury, it was difficult to imagine willingly sharing her affections.

Yet I'd realized something, recently. Something that had eluded me during a hundred year study of nearly every academic subject, something that seemed as instinctual to Bella as breathing.

Happiness; true happiness, was a selfless emotion.

It wasn't imposing your will on others to ensure that they did as you bade, because that was what you deemed safe or correct. And it certainly wasn't selfish acts that were achieved at the detriment to those closest to you.

It was spending several torturous hours in the mall with your sister, helping her pick out the 'perfect' yellow cardigan, because the excitement that lit up her face when you finally found the size extra small hidden on the clearance rack made your dead heart feel like it was beating again. And it was letting go of outdated notions in favor of letting the woman you loved be herself.

I _needed_ to make Bella happy. Her happiness and well-being were inextricably linked to my own. And this was something she wanted, even if she was too reticent to actually voice her request.

"Do you suppose a fall from this height would hurt?" Jasper questioned, interrupting my thoughts. He must have grown weary of my continued silence.

I strode toward the mouth of the ravine, crouching down to peer into it skeptically. It looked to be a five hundred foot drop or so. I briefly tried to envision the descent; the cool air rushing past my marble frame in what would probably be the closest I'd ever come to flying, followed by the jarring landing. I finally glanced up, shaking my head. "Probably not," I replied. "Would you care to find out?"

He chuckled, laying back on the dark, damp rocks and folding his arms beneath his head. "Nah, maybe some other time."

I nodded, taking a seat beside him as I tried to think of a way to introduce the topic without having him laugh in my face or take off running; both responses were equally likely.

The late evening sun hung heavy in the sky, its light refracting glittering rainbow beams from our skin onto the black stone around us. While it was certainly better than spontaneously combusting, as lore dramatically suggested, I had to admit that I'd always found the reaction peculiar-.

"Eddie, you didn't follow me all the way up here to spend time bonding. What do you want?" Jasper blurted, pragmatic as ever.

I sighed, rubbing my hand over my face. "It's about Bella."

"It always is," he smirked. "Come to tell me that you love her and ask me to back off? Or lament your unworthiness?"

Rather than take offense at the sarcastic remarks, I found them amusing. "If only," I laughed, thinking this would be so much easier if it were one of the old standbys.

He arched a brow, glancing at me curiously from the corner of his eye. His thoughts were masked by a steady stream of Lynyrd Skynyrd songs.

It was useless; there was _no_ delicate way to do this. So I took a page from Jasper's book and leapt in, head first. "Look, we have to decide what we're going to do about her. Forever is a rather long time to be bickering like children over a shiny new toy."

"I agree," Jasper answered noncommittally. It was obvious that he still expected me to ask him to bow out.

"Bella and I had our date last night," I segued.

His 'Sweet Home Alabama' blockade tumbled for a moment and all I could read from him was jealous fury. He reined it in swiftly, clearing his throat.

"That's right. How was that?"

My thoughts flashed to the night before, and I felt myself smiling widely. Despite the poor sportsmanship we'd both displayed on the golf course, what it'd led to had been...amazing. Nerve-wracking, considering my lack of experience, but amazing thanks to the guidance of her thoughts and my otherwise useless medical degrees. The feel of her hot, soft skin beneath my hands was something I would not soon forget, and fates willing, something I would be allowed to experience again.

"It went... well," I evaded.

He scoffed. "If those ridiculous grins you were both sporting was anything to go by, it went better than just well."

I chuckled, inclining my head slightly in agreement. "_Very_ well, then," I acceded.

He was quiet for a moment, but his fists were clenched in the short, dry grass beneath him, tearing the withered stalks from the earth. Every few seconds, a string of thoughts burst from the mental barrier he'd erected, incoherent without context.

When he spoke, he was quiet, and I knew that he regretted the words before he'd even voiced them. "Glad you two had a good time. But just so you know, _I_ primed that pump."

He'd never spoken that way about Bella, objectifying her in such a lewd manner, but I didn't call him on it. If I were in his shoes, I'd probably have said much worse.

"I suppose thanks are in order, then," I dead-panned.

He immediately stood, back rigid, but I grasped his sleeve and yanked him unceremoniously back to the ground.

"I'm not finished."

"I am," he growled, shaking my hand off. But he didn't leave.

"I'm sorry, alright?" I finally murmured, exasperated with the entirety of the situation. "Do you think that I want it to be like this?"

"I think you damn well enjoy throwing that shit in my face," he spat.

I rubbed my hand over my face tiredly. "Alright, I _do_ like that," I admitted. "But that's not why I'm here. I'm not interested in arguing with you, Jasper. We need to work this out. Before it gets any more out of hand."

His quiet laughter held no amusement. "What do you suggest, Eddie? There ain't no easy way about this. You love her. I love her. She loves the both of us. It's not like we can just share-" His silence was sudden, his eyes wide with disbelief as they swung toward me almost wildly. "Wait a second. You're not suggesting..."

I peered at the darkening sky silently, unwilling to look at him or affirm the thought. When he spoke it so incredulously it truly did seem like a ridiculous idea.

He jumped up, shaking his head back and forth. "Edward, seriously. I know you're not saying what I think you're saying. Are you saying-?"

"She wants it," I declared, cutting off his barely coherent tirade.

"What? Did she tell you that?"

"She didn't need to. I saw it. Last night, when we...on our date. She, uh... Well she's thought about it before, I can tell you that much."

He was pacing, dragging his hands through his hair, a mannerism I was fairly certain he'd picked up from me.

"What do you mean? Explain."

I smirked, arching a brow. "Do you really want me to go into detail about this, Jasper?"

"Yes!" he exclaimed. "Fuck your misplaced modesty."

Shrugging, I held up a hand as if to ward off his harsh words. "Alright, then." I picked up a handful of rocks and began tossing them into the cavernous maw, listening to the steady clacking as they bounced to the bottom. "She, uh. She took your advice-"

"What advice?" he snapped irritably.

"I can't believe you're making me say this..." I muttered, fairly certain that if I still had the ability to blush, I'd be rivaling some of Bella's finest at the moment. "When she was frustrated, she decided to take matters into her own hands. Literally."

He chuckled, a wry grin crossing his lips. "Oh, _that_ advice."

"Yes,_ that_ advice. She's thought about it a few times, and try as I might to leave those very private thoughts private, I've gleaned a few things. Most of which I wish I hadn't."

"Like?" he prompted, and impatience was foremost in his mind. He didn't believe that I was being truthful about Bella's desires. He thought this was an elaborate ploy to remove him from her affections.

I was annoyed that he would think so little of me. At the very least I'd have chosen a far less humiliating means of destroying my competition if that's what I was out to do.

"Like the fact that she was thinking about you when she, er... began," I muttered, hating the taste of the words in my mouth, but knowing that I'd need to be honest if there was any chance of this even being considered, let alone working. He seemed far too smug for my liking, so I finished quickly, anxious to wipe that look off his face. "But images of me continually snuck in, until by the end, they'd combined into a joining that she found rather pleasing."

"The three of us," he grumbled in summation.

I nodded slowly, watching the sun dip below the horizon, glittering stars blinking to life against a backdrop of royal violet and beryl-streaked navy.

"That's it?" he asked.

"No. Unfortunately, not. I wouldn't make such an assumption with so little information."

He ceased his obnoxious pacing to crouch on his haunches beside me. "Out with it."

"Alright, but I warn you, you won't like this."

"Edward, I think we should establish, right now, that I very rarely like _anything_ that comes out of your mouth."

I laughed quietly, despite the antagonist words. "Well, in the interest of tradition then... Last night, after you got Bella so worked up? Well, I saw to her needs, and she-"

Jasper stiffened at my side. "You 'saw to her needs'?" he growled, his tone dangerous as he interrupted me. His mind was a blank slate, not hinting at anything he may be planning to say or do.

I tensed slightly, muscles coiling in preparation for fight should it be necessary. "You asked for everything, Jasper. And yes, I did."

"On the first date? Like some cheap whore-"

Whatever else he meant to say was silenced as I rose in a blur of motion, the front of his shirt fisting in my hand before I threw him to the ground with a reverberating crack. Fury; pure, undiluted rage poured through me, and I pinned him to the rocks with shaking hands, leaning in to snarl, "Do not _ever_ call her that again, or I _will_ kill you."

"You fucking hypocrite," he growled, staying his struggles. His eyes were black with frenzied anger. "Do you honestly think I left her unfulfilled because I _wanted_ to? I did that out of respect for her, she deserves better than a fuck in the backseat of your car."

Confusion crept in, slowly pushing the madness back. "What? I didn't...we didn't..." I released him slowly, scooting back to my former position as he rose, straightening his shirt front.

"But you said..." he argued in bewilderment.

"No. God, no. I would never. Not like that. There are _other_ ways, Jasper," I laughed quietly.

"I'm surprised the poster boy for abstinence would know about that," he baited.

"I put my medical degrees to use."

"Alright, well that's about as much information as I need regarding that," he murmured dismissively. "Just tell me what you saw."

I shrugged helplessly, wishing that the memory of her thoughts was hazy or could have been misinterpreted, but there it was, crystal clear in my photographic vampire mind.

"I don't believe she even realized what she was thinking, she'd probably be mortified that I'm even telling you about this, but if there's one thing I've learned in my numerous psychology classes, it's that the subconscious is a powerful thing. And if this is something she truly wants..." I shrugged again. "She envisioned the three of us together, not just sexually, though that was certainly a factor. She imagined us laying in her bed, reading your copious civil war collection. She and I teaching you to play piano. Cooking in the kitchen. Making snow angels. Tangled together on the white sand beaches of Isle Esme, though of course she wasn't entirely certain what they looked like." I released a quiet, unnecessary breath. "This is not something she takes lightly; it's not an adolescent fantasy. When she thinks of the future, she honestly sees all three of us. Together."

He was silent for several long seconds, and I listened to his thoughts, hoping for insight he refused to voice. He didn't even attempt to block me.

He believed me, but I could see that he honestly thought it would never work; he'd already firmly made up his mind on that. He was angry that I'd brought it up, as though I'd somehow altered his image of Bella. And he was upset that this could only end in someone inevitably being hurt, he worried it would be him.

I frowned at the finality of his thoughts, there wasn't even an inkling of acceptance. "Just like that, Jasper? You always struck me as more of a fighter."

"No," he snapped. "It won't... We can't. No. Count me out."

And then he was gone.

* * *

Bella PoV

"Wow, a whole turkey. Expecting some company?"

I watched in surprise as Esme tossed the large bird into the shopping cart Emmett was pushing, laughing beneath my breath when he inevitably leaned in and sniffed the fowl before grimacing and pulling away quickly.

"That's disgusting," he opined with a smirk.

"You're disgusting," I argued, swatting at his arm lightly.

He uttered a long-suffering sigh, murmuring mournfully, "It's times like these when I really miss certain bodily functions. I mean, that's the perfect setup!"

I did my best not to laugh, but c'mon. I could easily see Emmett cutting loose a belch, or worse, just to prove how disgusting he was.

Esme grinned despite herself and kept walking. I caught up to her and jumped onto the back of the cart, giving Emmett a brief evil eye that warned I'd better not end up on the floor.

"Soooo… The turkey? You guys thinking about another change of diet?" I teased.

She laughed easily, the melodic sound invoking pleasant childhood memories. "No, no. That's for you, sweetheart."

I chuckled, peering into the cart wide-eyed. "Alright, mom, now I know I can put it away, but even _I _can't polish off an entire turkey. Of course if Em was still human, I'd tell you to get two, maybe three…"

He laughed boisterously, leaning in to ruffle my hair playfully, pushing the strands messily into my eyes.

"Stop!" I chastised, batting him away before stumbling my way off the cart and linking my arm with my mom's.

"It's for Thanksgiving tomorrow."

"Thanksgiving?" I echoed dumbly.

Carlisle had made it a point to volunteer our time on Thanksgiving and even Christmas Eve to food shelves or homeless shelters for as far back as I could remember. He always impressed upon us the importance of giving back to the community we were a part of; a notion that I'd have found bizarre coming from a vampire if they were anyone but my dad. I never minded the work. In fact, it seemed to serve as a healthy dose of reality; reminder not to take my life and everything in it for granted.

Emmett chimed in from behind, "Yeah, Thanksgiving. You know, the annual celebration on the fourth Thursday in November to give thanks to God-"

I glared at him over my shoulder. "I _know_ what Thanksgiving is, Em, thanks."

He shrugged, all wide-eyed innocence and dimples.

Esme guided me down an aisle, nodding absently. "Carlisle and I decided that since this is your last year as a mortal we'd like you to experience the tradition."

The corners of my lips hitched in a faint smile. "Alice put you guys up to this, huh?"

She suddenly looked at me, laughing softly. "Perhaps."

I arched a brow at the evasive answer and she relented.

"Alright, alright. She said that your last Thanksgiving as a mortal shouldn't be spent eating a t.v. dinner."

Hungryman pilgrim platter?

Delicious.

No, really.

"I don't mind. You know, we kind of have our own tradition anyway.""Forget it, Bells," Emmett interjected decisively, leaning over the cart and tugging at one of my curls. "They've already made up their minds. Besides, soon enough you'll have about a zillion Thanksgivings at the shelter to look forward to."

I nodded in absent agreement.

It was hard to believe that it was already late November; what with my new human friends, reconnecting with Emmett and being the rope in Edward and Jasper's constant game of tug-of-war; the weeks had flown by in a blur.

Emmett and Lys had finally made up; after seeing Edward talking to her in the hall at school one day I pretty much saw it coming. And surprisingly, I was actually happy for him. I'd had some time to really think about his monumental mistake, and I'd realized that family had to stand together. I could forgive my big brother without betraying the love I felt for Rosalie. I didn't have to choose sides because it wasn't my battle to fight.

Besides, moping Emmett was a far cry from fun Emmett; if I had to watch A Lot Like Love one more time, I was going to snap.

Forgiving Lys, however, was an entirely different matter. Emmett had betrayed Rosalie, but Lys had betrayed me. And even at the very bottom of my heart, where the faintest of kindness still resided for the young parents who'd abandoned me and the insecure bully who had made me her target, there was nothing for the girl that had torn my family apart.

Carlisle had been pestering me to sit down and talk with him and Emmett about the situation, but I didn't think I was quite ready to delve into all of that. I told him simply that I would prefer if she were not changed, but that I understood it wasn't my choice. I trusted that in the end, he would make the decision that was best for the family.

Besides, I had my own relationship issues without having to worry about cleaning up the messes that Emmett was making.

Since my date with Edward, my very _interesting_ date with Edward, he and Jasper had been driving me completely crazy. Not the 'pull-my-own-hair-out-because-of-sexual-frustration' crazy, but the 'if-I-didn't-think-I-might-break-all-of-my-fingers-I'd-smack-you' crazy.

It was a constant show of one-upmanship with those two. If Jasper wanted to hang out, Edward would demand twice as much of my time. If Edward kissed me, Jasper would pull me aside and thoroughly grope me. The attention was nice, more than nice really, but I didn't want it like this.

The only problem was, how did I make it stop? Attempting to get them to talk to one another was completely futile; the few conversations they _had_ engaged in were short, terse and seemed to be a word away from coming to blows. I hated the idea of being the catalyst to those explosive encounters. And to think that I might have been the figurative straw that broke the back of their very tenuous relationship...

I sighed softly, dragging my fingertip along the canned vegetables we passed.

I was such a coward.

For the past several weeks I'd been standing on the sidelines, watching the discord unfold with very little protest. They were vampires, I was a measly human, and if they wanted to fight I couldn't stop them.

Except that I probably could.

Guilt churned agonizingly in my stomach and I wrapped my arms defensively around my mid-section.

All it would take would be a couple of words. A simple, "hey guys, I want you both, is there any way we could work that arrangement out?"

Easy peasey, right?

Yeah right. Even hearing the words in my head caused my cheeks to flame with mortification. Not only was it an extremely unorthodox solution, but I had to wonder how fair that would be to them.

Then again, was it fair of _them_ to try and force me to choose?

It was all so confusing, despite Alice's encouraging words.

My intentions were good, if not entirely philanthropic. I wanted to see the two of them smile at one another like they used to, when I was a child. I wanted the comfort, love and protection that we could provide one another. I wanted happiness for the three of us.

It just didn't seem attainable. They were barely civil, and when it came to me not even that. I was pretty much convinced that should I even mention this to them, an idea that terrified and mortified me in equal parts, I would lose them both.

And that was one thought that I simply couldn't bear.

But neither could I imagine choosing between the two. I'd tried, in the sanctuary of my bedroom when I was certain Edward wasn't within 'hearing' range, to pick one, weighing the pros and cons, looking into my heart, envisioning the future, and found it next to impossible.

I knew, the longer I waited, the worse this would all end. I just wished there was some way of knowing… Which was the right choice? Was there any hope at all for the one thing I truly wanted?

It didn't seem like there was an outcome to this that wouldn't leave at least one, if not all, of us heartbroken.

So, I selfishly dragged my feet as though the soles of my shoes were melting, allowing the hostility to fester so that I didn't have to make difficult decisions. It was only a matter of time, I knew, before everything exploded.

"Did you like the stuffing that we had a few years ago?"

I blinked as Esme's voice effectively pulled me out of my gloomy ponderings, glancing at the pre-boxed dinners and pasta with some confusion. "I'm sorry, what?"

She was attentively studying the back of a red Stove Top box as she murmured, "Stuffing, did you like it?"

"I didn't," Emmett reminded us unnecessarily.

I rolled my eyes. I couldn't think of a single human food that he'd tasted and actually liked.

"Really Em, why do you even bothe-"

"Shit! Alice gave me a list!" He suddenly tugged a crumpled piece of paper out of his pocket, smoothing the creases and staring at the words as though they were written in some indecipherable foreign language.

"Quick! Where would I find...'festive...Thanksgiving plates'?" He dashed off before either of us could reply.

Laughing quietly, I took over cart-pushing duty. Esme gestured as to whether or not she should toss the stuffing into the cart.

"Yes? No?"

"No thanks. Soggy, spicy bread really isn't my thing."

She chuckled and replaced the box on the shelf, falling in step beside me as we continued onward.

"Something on your mind, sweetheart? You're awfully quiet this evening," Esme asked, four aisles later.

I sighed tiredly. As much as I wanted to relieve myself of the burden sitting so heavily on my shoulders, I couldn't imagine bringing the subject up with my mom.

"Just...stuff," I evaded.

She wrapped an arm around my shoulder. "Boy stuff?" she queried with an amused smile.

"What?" I asked in surprise, wondering if perhaps she was hiding a little mind-reading gift of her own. I hadn't mentioned my quandary to anyone since Halloween, when Alice and I had chatted. I hurried to change the subject. "No. No way. Boys? Ha. Yeah right. Hey look, refried beans." I felt the warmth of a tell-tale blush begin circulating in my face and scowled. I had to be the worst liar of all time.

"No?" Esme led us into the produce section, smiling at an elderly woman who was surreptitiously squeezing plums. "Because with the way Edward and Jasper have been acting lately, I figured you'd be knee deep in boy troubles. I hope the three of you work something out soon."

My jaw dropped, mouth working as if to create words, though none were forthcoming.

My impression of a fish out of water lasted for several seconds, at which point I still only managed to croak, "What?"

She grabbed a bunch of carrots, putting them into a bag and then into the cart, her smile knowing. "Carlisle and I may not interfere with our 'children's' lives unless asked to, but that doesn't mean that we're not paying attention."

Ice condensed in my stomach, spreading quickly into my limbs as horror rushed through me. Did that mean? Did she…? How much did she know? What must she think of me? My fingers were clutching convulsively at the cart, white-knuckled and trembling. She would definitely notice if I turned and ran, wouldn't she?

Cool fingers suddenly brushed my cheek and my eyes focused on Esme's beautiful, smiling face.

"Bella," she soothed in that voice that only mom's seemed to have. "Hey, it's alright."

I began to feel less like a deer in headlights as her words trickled into my brain.

"It is?" I replied, my voice small.

She nodded slowly, leaning in to kiss my forehead. "Of course it is. Carlisle and I understand that you love both Edward and Jasper, and they love you in return..." She frowned thoughtfully. "...though not cooperatively."

"Oh my God," I muttered, the heat in my face reaching unbearable levels. "This is so embarrassing."

"Why? Love and passion aren't tidy, straight-forward emotions, Bella, at least not when they're done right."

Was I following this conversation correctly? I couldn't be. This was obviously a nightmare or something.

"Certainly you don't think you're the first person, immortal or otherwise, to contemplate taking more than one mate. "

I covered my face with my hands, desperately praying for an architectural anomaly to cause the floor to open up and swallow me. "Oh my God," I squeaked.

Esme grasped my hands, pulling them down and tilting my chin up so that I looked at her. "Bella, sweetheart, I'm not trying to embarrass you. I just want to remind you that we're family. Whatever your decisions, we support you."

As I peered into her loving topaz eyes I was able to see past the humiliation of my _mother_ talking to me about a cooperative relationship between Jasper, Edward and I; I was able to accept the support and understanding that she was offering and take comfort in the knowledge that should I make it to Oz and the Wizard finally granted me courage, my family wouldn't be ashamed of me.

"Thanks, mom."

She nodded, smirking as she turned away. "I just hope you know what you're getting yourself into. It's no easy task that you've got ahead of you."

I smiled. "I seem to recall a very wise woman once telling me that nothing worth having ever came easy."

Her voice was amused as she grabbed a bag for a bunch of celery. "That was Rose."

Flushing, I frowned. "Was it…?"

"Hey you guys!" Emmett skidded around a corner, nearly took out creepy plum lady, and came to a halt in front of us, the stacks of paper plates in his arms teetering precariously. "You gotta help me out here!"

Esme and I exchanged a knowing smile and I gestured for Emmett to show me what he had. "Okay, let's see."

Now _this_, was a decision I could make.

* * *

I woke the following Thursday to the single most delicious smell I could ever recall; the scent of cooking turkey wafted up from the kitchen to hang heavily on the current of warm air coming into my room.

I stretched languorously; turning on my side and burrowing into the warmth of my comforter, watching the hazy gray landscape outside my window with heavy-lidded eyes. It was one of those perfect mornings; the kind that seemed as though it could last all day if you were feeling just lazy enough to stay in bed. I could hear the quiet rustling and chatter of my family from downstairs; Emmett and Alice laughing while Carlisle scolded in a voice that he couldn't quite keep the amusement out of. Rain pattered steadily on the roof, a soothing, familiar sound, and thunder rumbled half-heartedly in the distance. If I listened closely, I could just make out Charlie Brown's dejected voice coming from the television in the living room.

I smiled softly, burying my face in my pillow. Despite all of the dramatics and chaos, especially lately, I knew that I was still incredibly lucky to have the life and the family that I did. I closed my eyes on a contented sigh, wondering if I'd ever get over the awe that accompanied that constant realization.

Perhaps a half hour later, I started out of my doze as the doorknob gave a quiet click, warning me that my pleasant solitude was about to be interrupted. I tensed slightly, half expecting Emmett to come barreling in, dive bombing into bed with me. The other half of that expectation belonged to Alice and her army of beauty products. I turned warily to identify the intruder.

Who I _wasn't_ expecting to see was Jasper; wearing blue plaid pajama pants that hung low on his hips and a white t-shirt, his blonde hair softly tousled, he looked as though he'd just gotten up himself. It surprised me, as he stood there, framed by the door, how human he looked. Pale, but human.

"Mornin', darlin'," he drawled softly, and I found myself smiling and gesturing him into the room. I was very aware of the fact that he kicked the door closed with his heel. Not that it really mattered around here...

"Mornin', Jazz." I stretched, flipping onto my back with a slow smile." Sleep well?" I teased.

Chuckling, he walked around the room, casting an appraising glance at my newly stocked bookshelves. "Oh yeah, best night's sleep I've ever had," he replied playfully.

I studied him as he trailed a long finger over the spines of the books, admiring the graceful cords of muscle running the length of his lithe frame; I couldn't ever remember being more jealous of an inanimate object than I currently was of those books. Watching his hands it was all too easy to recall the feel of them, cool and strong running along my flushed skin, impatiently pushing clothing away only to slow down and tease...

_Empath in the room... Warning, warning!_

Common sense issued the alert just in time and I reined in my wayward lust, clearing my throat and hastily tucking the enticing images back into the gutters of my mind. Was it too much to hope that he hadn't picked up on those distracting emotions? My eyes reluctantly strayed back to Jasper's face, and of course, he was watching me, a bemused smirk playing on his perfect lips.

I tried to stop the predictable blush that immediately caused my cheeks to flame, but the harder I tried, the more I thought about what had caused the heat in the first place and the warmer my face got. I finally gave up with a small sigh and ducked under the covers.

Several seconds later the mattress beside me dipped beneath his weight.

"You know, these are the times when I wish Edward and I could trade abilities," he declared, obvious amusement in his voice.

I pushed the blankets down to stick my tongue out at him.

He grinned unapologetically, broad shoulders shrugging. "Sorry darlin', but sometimes I'm mighty curious to know what's going on in that pretty little head of yours."

"You could just, oh I don't know, ask me," I replied, managing to keep the sarcasm to a minimum.

Jasper simply chuckled in response, glancing down at me from where he reclined against the headboard. "Alright, what are you thinking about right now?"

I sniffed primly, shaking my head. "Oh, I can't say. It's completely inappropriate."

The sound of his laughter echoed softly in the dim light of the room, and I decided that this was something I could far too easily get used to.

I turned and snuggled into Jasper's side, laying my head against his stomach and curling my fingers in the soft fabric of his t-shirt. His arm came around me, his fingers toying with the ends of my disheveled hair.

We lay like that for several quiet minutes, content in one another's presence, before I asked drowsily, "Do you ever miss it?"

"Hmm?" he murmured, and I met his gaze.

"Sleeping," I clarified. "Dreams. I mean, don't you ever feel tired?"

His soft laughter rumbled gently beneath my ear. "Yeah, but not in the same way you do. Physically, I don't know that I actually have much in the way of limits, but mentally... Well, it'd be nice to be able to shut down for a little while."

I nodded, curiously pondering, "I wonder _why_ you can't sleep. I suppose it's probably for the same reasons as why your heart doesn't beat and you don't need to breathe."

I was surprised by the terse edge in his voice when he responded. "The same reason that we require blood to survive. We're dead, and what animates us now requires less, yet entirely more, than the average human."

I frowned, uncertain of how to answer that. Jasper had never said anything to me about dissatisfaction with his current life. Would he rather be human, if he had the choice? Without knowing the details of his story, I couldn't even hazard a guess. And unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to ask.

"Bella?" he suddenly murmured; hesitant. It was a quality that I didn't hear too often in Jasper's voice, and it drew my immediate attention.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

I grinned wryly. "You've never asked permission before."

He squeezed my shoulder lightly. "Well, no. But what I need to ask you, it's kind of personal."

I wanted to tell him that he'd had his hands in places that only one other person had, and I didn't see how it got much more personal than that, but I just bit my lower lip and nodded.

He didn't respond immediately, and I looked up at him, studying the sharp angles of his handsome face in the murky light.

"I know that you're feeling torn, Bella, with decisions and confusion about Edward and I; and I know that we haven't been making it any easier on you."

I shifted uncomfortably, immediately uneasy with this conversation and where it might potentially be headed. Jasper anchored me to his side with his arm around my shoulders.

"Edward said somethin' that got me thinking... If it were an option... Would a relationship that included..." he paused, his face contorting slightly. "...the three of us be something that you'd be interested in?"

I desperately tried to clamp down on the confusion, humiliation, and anger that began to churn somewhere in the depths of my stomach; knowing that it'd be as good an answer as a resounding 'YES!' to Jasper, but it was hopeless. I pushed against his chest futilely, wanting to get away from him and the entire mortifying conversation, but his grasp simply tightened.

"Let. Go!" I demanded, uttering a soft cry of surprise as I suddenly found myself flipped onto my back, my hands pinned to the bed on either side of my head. The cool length of Jasper's body lay just above mine, caging me.

Why couldn't he have wanted to wrestle _prior_ to delving into portions of my psyche that _I _didn't even like touching?

"Answer me," he commanded, leaning close so that his cool breath bathed my face, the sweet scent inviting me to respond. His topaz eyes bore into mine, and I felt myself quickly falling into their honeyed depths.

"Don't!" I shrieked, slamming my eyes closed and holding my breath against his attempts to Dazzle me. Like many of the Cullens, Jasper was a man who was used to getting his way; by whatever means necessary.

His hands tightened around my wrists to a point just short of pain. "Look at me," he growled, and fear crept up swiftly; it was the first time in a long time that Jasper hadn't dispelled the emotion with calm. Instead, his own confused anger beat at my consciousness, fueling the discordance surrounding us.

And it was from this dissonance that a long-dormant survival instinct flickered to life, calmly advising me that to act submissive right now would be a very bad thing. If I acted like prey, he would treat me like prey. My eyes blinked open and I defiantly met Jasper's gaze.

"What do you want me to say Jasper? That I'm sorry? Because I am. If I could make it different, I _would_! But I can't. I can't stop what I feel."

"Shut up," he snarled softly, his fingers at my wrists causing me to wince as they tightened for just a second. I was having tremendous difficulty reconciling _this_ Jasper with _my_ Jasper, because there was no way they were the same person. Yet I must have known instinctually that the easy-going man I loved was still in there somewhere, because it didn't even occur to me to call for help.

I watched in trepidation as he closed his eyes, lowering his face to my neck and breathing deeply, silent for several long seconds. I'd be a liar if I said that having his mouth that close to a major artery when I knew he was upset didn't scare me, but my fears were unfounded. His hands slowly released their hold upon me, stroking down my arms gently before falling away all together. Finally, I felt a serene wave of calm break against my anxiety, lowering it by several notches though not dispelling it entirely.

Jasper pulled away from me, his movements almost exaggeratedly slow, as though he didn't want to frighten me further, and sat on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands.

I scrambled upright, pushing myself against the headboard and clutching my knees tightly to my chest.

"I'm sorry, Bella. You see, _this_ is why what you want would never work. I can't even imagine... When I think that you and he might... I..." He looked up suddenly, his expression pained. He reached out to me, but dropped his hand before it made contact. "I'm in love with you," he finally murmured.

And without further ado whatever barrier he'd erected to keep those feelings hidden from me fell, and the tidal wave of emotion that comprised Jasper's love washed over me. It was like stepping into the sun after weeks of nothing but rain; beautiful, but nearly painful in its blinding intensity.

I closed my eyes, gasping softly as the raw, undiluted emotion assaulted me. Happiness, contentment, pride, jealousy, joy, desire... love. My heart swelled until it felt as though it might burst and my stomach fluttered as the gilt-winged butterflies that lay dormant there were awakened. My limbs tingled with an undercurrent of phantom energy and a curious throb began low in my belly.

If this was what it was to be loved by Jasper, I didn't think I could ever get enough.

And then, just as swiftly as it had begun, it stopped; reined in and contained once more in whatever place inside of him that he buried it.

I desperately gathered my scattered wits, rubbing my damp palms on the legs of my pants as I took a trembling breath. I was bereft in the wake of what Jasper had shared with me; I wanted more. All memory of our terrifying encounter only a few minutes prior had been banished so completely that I didn't falter for even a moment as I leaned forward and laid my hand lightly on his rigid shoulder. "Jasper, I didn't... Wow," I breathed softly.

His smile was rueful as he reached up to take my hand in his, pulling it down to his lap where he peered at my fingers as though they were the most interesting things he'd ever seen. "Don't think I'm trying to sway you, Bella... I just... I want you to understand. What I feel for you..." He shook his head, dragging his free hand through his unruly hair. "Well, you felt it. It's so... consuming; nearly uncontrollable. In a hundred and fifty years, I've never felt anything like it. And it fucking scares the shit out of me."

I smiled faintly at his less-than-eloquent words, moving closer until I knelt at his side, absently sweeping my thumb across the back of his hand. "Why?"

He frowned thoughtfully, tracing the lines of my palm with his forefinger as though telling my future. "You ever notice how I seem a bit apathetic? Maybe I don't react as strongly to things as, say, you or Edward might?"

That was certainly an understatement. From Emmett's betrayal to Edward's intrusions, Jasper always seemed to have the ability to keep a level head. It was an ability that I envied, yet found infuriating all the same.

"I might have noticed something like that," I chuckled, my breath feathering the hair at his temple. I watched in fascination as he closed his eyes and a languid pulse of lust emanated from him. I couldn't help but wonder what other reactions I might be able to incite, were I so inclined.

He finally dragged in a breath, peering at me from the corner of his eye. "You ever wonder why that might be?" Before I could respond he continued. "It's 'cause broadcasting your emotions? Well, it gives other people power over you, darlin'. Anger, love, jealousy, sorrow; they're all weapons. The kind of weapons that, used properly, can destroy you so completely from the inside out that there's nothing left." He smiled, though the expression was mirthless. "How do you think I get to Eddie so easily? Even without my gift, he wears that shit on his sleeve. I don't."

I frowned, rocking back on my heels and shaking my head incredulously as I digested what he was saying. "You can't possibly believe that, Jas. You _can't_ believe that there's _no one _you can trust; no one who not only would never wield your emotions against you, but who wouldn't even see them as weapons?"

"Not nobody, but most. I learned the hard way, a long time ago, that the people you think you can trust are usually those that you can't." He gazed across the room silently for several long minutes and I realized that though he was staring at the brightly painted wall of my bedroom, he was seeing something else entirely. It didn't take a genius to put the pieces together.

Anger and sorrow warred for control at the thought of someone hurting my Jasper so terribly that he felt the need to wear a near-constant mask of indifference. How could he believe that his emotions were a weakness; a tool to be manipulated and used against him by those callous enough to do so? "Who betrayed you?" I whispered, swallowing hard against the lump that was fast forming in my throat.

"Maria," he replied simply. His tone betrayed no emotion, as if the very thought of this woman had caused him to retreat back into whatever shell she'd forced him to build.

I waited silently, but he didn't elaborate, and despite my gnawing curiosity, I didn't ask him to. It was more about his past than he'd ever shared with me before, and I worried that if I pushed now, he'd close right back up.

Unfortunately, he did just that anyway. His gaze grew lucid and he slowly shook his head, as though clearing it of the unwanted memories.

"The point is, Bella, you wield more power over me than anyone has before. You create these emotions that refuse to be ignored, that I can barely contain."

I clasped both of his hands, leaning in with a small smile.

"Jasper, you can trust me. I will _never_ intentionally do anything to hurt you. I promise."

He moved closer yet, and I was acutely aware of the cool strength of his frame, so very near to my own. His cold lips just touched the end of my nose in the lightest of kisses, and I giggled softly at the tickling sensation. His low, sweet sigh bathed my face and it took everything I had to keep control of my mental faculties. "I believe you, Bella. I would've never shown you how I felt if I didn't trust you. Hell, I don't think you have a deceptive bone in your fragile little body."

I rolled my eyes, nudging his shoulder playfully. "So, what's the problem?"

He paused, before blurting his words in such a rush that if I hadn't been listening so closely, I probably would've missed them. "The closer to the surface I allow my emotions...these volatile emotions specifically, the harder it is for me to control myself around you; the easier it is for me to bend to the will of my baser instincts." He shook his head, blowing out a long breath. "Fuck, I sound like Edward."

I laughed, falling back on my hands as I peered at him with a skeptical brow arched.

"What's that look for?" he demanded with a slight scowl.

I shrugged, answering with honest simplicity. "I don't think you'd ever hurt me."

His expression grew serious as he murmured, "Did you ever think that Edward would hurt you?"

The question sobered me immediately as nightmarish images of Edward's lapse filled my mind. His cruel hands and emotionless eyes; his mocking words that denied the worth of my life. I shook my head numbly, the sound of my swallowing audible in the silence that had descended. Cool hands on my face drew me out of the minefield my own mind had become. I blinked to find Jasper's concerned gaze only inches away.

"Why did you say that?" I murmured brokenly, hating that the memory of that night still held such sway over me; how easily I could be transported back to the horror that had changed everything.

"I need you to understand," he murmured, running his thumb along my cheek slowly. "Carlisle likes to pretend that we have this sweet little civilized family, but the truth of it is, we're vampires. First and foremost, Bella. Some things rile us easy: blood, protecting our coven and mates, sex, fighting... And some things take us by surprise, like Edward telling me that he and you... well that you two..."

I blushed about twenty shades of red as I realized what he was talking about, holding my hand up and desperately muttering, "Don't...don't say it."

"Well, darlin', I just about ripped his head off when he told me. Literally."

"What?" I gasped softly, glancing up in surprise. Fighting was one thing...no one had mentioned potential dismemberment. And I definitely hadn't signed up for decapitation.

He shrugged helplessly. "I'm not going to lie to you. Whatever it is inside me, my demon or whatever the fuck it is that replaced my soul... It recognizes you as its own. And it's not real keen on the idea of sharing you."

"I don't... You don't have to... I'm not asking..." I stuttered the half-formed denials as I desperately scrambled to sort out the completely fucked up mess I'd created.

Jasper interrupted me with an easy smile. "You do and you are," he argued gently. "Edward told me what's been on your mind. I just... I don't get it, Bella," he admitted.

Humiliated tears prickled my eyes and I swiped the back of my hand over my face roughly. "I don't get it either, okay Jas?"

"Is he fulfilling some need of yours that you think that I won't be able to?"

"No, of course not," I snapped irritably, feeling as though I was being stretched too taut; as though I was incredibly close to some sort of breaking point.

"Keeping your options open?"

I simply glared.

"Bella, I'm trying to understand, but you gotta help me out here."

I rubbed my eyes with my fingertips. "I barely understand it myself," I breathed defeatedly. "I just can't stand the thought of not having the both of you in my life. I need you, both, so much. And that's selfish, God, I'm selfish, but I know that if I choose one of you, the other one's going to leave, just like Rose. I don't want that. I don't want to hurt either of you." The stupid tears had started, and I sniffled miserably, knowing there was no stopping them now until they'd run their course.

Strong arms suddenly closed around me, and I found myself in Jasper's lap, my face pressed to his chest. I cried for what felt like hours. Tears for the friendship lost between the two men I loved. Tears for the heartache I'd already cause. And tears for the inevitable decision I would be forced to make.

* * *

**A/N: Part one of two. Sorry it's not very action-packed, but there's still a lot of stuff that needs to be worked out.**

**Annnnd!**

**I'm writing a one shot and participating in a collab fic for the awesome Breath-of-twilight's Countdown to Valentine's Day. Posting starts February 1st****, two one-shots (rated M) a day until the 14****th****, at which point the collab fic will be posted. Keep an eye out for my Jasper/Bella oneshot "A Love Eternal".**

**Thanks for reading!**

**~Ex**


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